This Is Who I Am
by pattyrose
Summary: Edward Cullen, successful business exec/playboy/all around bad boy. Bella Swan, divorced mom/graphic artist/unwilling to trust her heart to the likes of someone like Edward again. Will she give him a chance? Does he even deserve one? AH, AU ExB
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey there everyone! I've got a new story for you guys below. Give it a read and let me know what you think. **

**This'll be rated M for language, and eventually some limes.**

**Thanks to my lovely Beta Danna0274, who's helping me out with this little baby now. Love you lots girlfriend!**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just moving them over to the East Coast for a while.**

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**Chapter 1 – First Impressions **

_First Impressions are a constant in society. However, their product, the period that proves or disproves their validity is not; good ones are pleasant and long-lasting, bad ones long and difficult to disprove. __**- Diego Velasquez**_

_**EPOV**_

"Shhh. Jesus, keep it down!" I whispered roughly into Lauren's ear. Her moans were getting annoyingly louder. I fisted her short bleached hair within my palms, trying to communicate the need for her silence right about now, but that just seemed to get her more worked up. I rolled my eyes in the low light of the closed conference room.

Truth be told, I was having a hard time seeing what the hell she was so excited about. I mean, for Christ's sake, we were both still fully dressed here. Granted, she'd been hinting at getting me alone in this conference room for months now, but she was going to have to get a grip or we'd both be knee deep in some serious shit if we got caught.

"Sorry!" she giggled quietly, her clumsy hands working on my shirt buttons with an almost amusing eagerness. I had to press my lips together to keep from laughing out loud. Sighing, I leaned my head back against the wall and let her continue with her efforts. When her hands reached the last button, she looked up at me triumphantly and I rewarded her with the grin I knew drove 'em all crazy. Dazed, she fumbled with the button, unable to get it open and finally giving up. She threw her arms around my neck and greedily attacked my lips instead.

"Oh God Edward," she moaned, pulling my head forward. "I can't believe I'm here with you!" In her zeal, she pushed me back against the wall with a loud thump.

I grabbed her wrists and pulled her arms off of me. "You seriously need to calm down or we're both fucked," I hissed.

"Well, that's the idea!" she giggled again, winding her arms around me once more. Her lips landed sloppy kisses all over my face. I smirked and gave up, letting her have her way with me. She was right, after all. _That_ was the basic idea here.

'_What the hell am I doing here?'_ I wondered, during a short moment of clarity. Emmett would friggin' castrate me if he found out I was locked in one of our conference rooms with an employee. As one of the owners of Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock, or CCW for short, the fastest growing privately-owned ad agency on the East Coast, there were certain standards I was expected to abide by; certain rules and regulations to follow. Or so Emmett and Jasper constantly reminded me. I was pretty sure a quick hook up with one of the agency's Graphic Artists in a locked conference room wouldn't fall under one of those standards.

But _damn it,_ what was I supposed to do? For months now, Lauren had been all but physically jumping me every time I so much as glanced her way. She'd give me her please-do-me-now eyes from across the conference table during meetings, bend down and stick her junk out to pick up invisible objects whenever she saw me coming. Hell, lately she'd graduated to "accidentally" bumping into me and shoving her hooters right in my chest. I mean, shit, there was only so much a man could take before looking like a total pussy.

If anything, I was doing her _and_ the agency a favor here. The girl obviously had only one thing on her mind when she came into work every day. By letting her finally have her way with me, maybe she'd finally stop with the less-than-subtle advances and get her ass back to work.

A win – win situation all around, right?

'_Yeah, good luck getting Em and Jazz to see it that way,'_ the small part of my brain not currently in my pants snorted. They'd hang me by my balls for this. I sighed and closed my eyes, while Lauren continued her ministrations. Was this shit seriously even worth the trouble?

Lauren must've mistaken my sigh for some friggin' sign of encouragement or some shit. Her hands moved down to my belt buckle, and the small part of my brain that had still been in my head took a quick trip south. A crooked smile formed on my lips.

_Oh yeah. This was going to be worth it. _

But Lauren was either dexterity-challenged, or her continued over-eagerness kept messing with the competency of her fingers, and she fumbled with the buckle, her fingers pulling and yanking with no regard for the noisy clanking metal.

"Shh" I hissed in her ear, making her quiver and fumble even more.

I rolled my eyes and smirked. Her over-eagerness was going to get us so unbelievably busted.

And just as I was thinking that, a light tapping on the door wiped the smirk off of my face. Lauren's floundering hands stopped instantly, and although it was dark as hell in here, I was sure the look of horror suddenly pasted on her face mirrored mine exactly.

"Fuck!" I whispered roughly into her hair, lifting my hands to her shoulders to keep her still. "I told you to keep that shit down!"

I covered her mouth with my hand and waited, not daring to breathe. After a few seconds of silence, I sighed in relief and quickly began doing up my shirt and adjusting my belt. Even in the dark, I could see OverEager Lauren's annoyed smirk, as if I'd just snatched a cookie out of her hands. I shot her a look that said 'What the hell is your problem?'

The girl was definitely nuts. Was she _trying_ to find her ass unemployed in this type of job market? She worked in Rosalie's department, and Rose would have her eager ass on the street in a heartbeat if she ever found out about this. And knowing Rose, she wouldn't hesitate for a second to rat me out to her hubby Emmett. That traitor quickly forgot who the hell introduced them to each other in the first place.

Scowling, Overeager adjusted her clothes and smoothed down her short, bleached-blond hair.

And then we heard it again.

Knock, Knock, Knock.

Three little rasps; like the sound of tiny pebbles scraping against the door.

_"Shiiit!"_ I mouthed, nervously running one hand through my hair.

Suddenly, a sweet, honey-like voice called out. "Hello? Who's in theugh?"

It was a kid's voice; a very young one.

What in the hell was a little kid doing in our offices?

I frowned, looking over at Lauren. But instead of looking as confused as me, Lauren wore an annoyed smirk on her face.

Knock, Knock, Knock.

Again.

If we hadn't been twenty-two stories up, I may have seriously considered jumping out the window.

"Hello? I left my Angie dolly in theugh," the tiny voice called out timidly. "Can I peez have huh back? I miss huh."

My frown deepened. My confusion grew. Abruptly Lauren rolled her eyes and sucked her teeth, before walking towards the door. As soon as I realized what she was about to do, I grabbed on to her arm to stop her.

"Relax!" she whispered before turning the door knob. "It's the new girl's kid. I'll take care of her."

Before I could protest, the light from outside the room streamed in, blinding me momentarily. I pressed myself up against the wall, trying to make myself invisible to whoever stood outside.

"Hey Macie!" Lauren cooed in a sickeningly sweet voice. "What can I do for you?"

"Um, hi miss," the little girl answered shyly. "I left my dolly in theugh. Can I get huh back peez?" Her pleading tone almost broke my heart, which was surprising, because I hadn't even been aware that shit worked.

Her peculiar enquiry though made me quickly scan the room, and my eyes landed on a small rag doll with two pigtails, smack in the middle of the conference room table. Funny how it had gone completely unnoticed while Lauren had me up against the wall.

But Lauren was already answering the little girl.

"There's no doll in here honey. Sorry. Now run along and go play by the water cooler. There's some cups there you can pour water into and get all nice and wet. Doesn't that sound like fun?" she purred.

The little girl was silent for about three seconds. "Peez?" she begged in an almost whisper. "Can I just get Angie? I miss huh, and she must be scauhd." Her tiny voice cracked at the end.

And I felt as if my heart were cracking with it.

But I had no time to examine the meaning of that, because apparently it did nothing to the heartless witch at the door.

Lauren sighed, annoyed. "Look, I told you. There's no doll in here. Now run along and-"

She didn't get a chance to finish her sentence. In two quick strides I'd snatched the doll of the table and, glaring at Lauren with a look that called her the word I'd been taught by my mother to _never_ call a woman, I passed her and knelt in front of the little girl with the angel voice.

With an encouraging smile, I held out the small rag doll, meeting her eyes.

Huge, chocolate brown eyes locked on mine, momentarily startling me. I'd never seen such a tiny face with such big, expressive eyes. Something clenched inside my chest.

But once again, I had no time to examine what that meant, because quicker than I could've imagined such a tiny being moving, she grabbed her doll and started running.

I stepped out of the conference room, my eyes locked on the tiny thing running at full speed.

"Hey. Wait!" I called out, needing to find out who the little girl belonged to.

Two things happened at once then.

A brunette I'd never seen before suddenly rounded the corner, relief coloring her pale face as she caught sight of the little girl. But before my eyes and my mind had enough time to fully register that scene, out of my periphery, I saw Rosalie step out from the opposite corridor. I closed my eyes and cursed under my breath.

_Shit!_

I was going to have to play this one carefully. I was still standing in front of the conference room. Lauren was just behind me, right at the door. My office was one floor above, between Emmett and Jasper's offices, and there was really no reason for me to be on this floor right now. I ran a frustrated hand through my messy hair, wondering how well I'd fixed myself up before stepping out of the conference room.

I was so screwed. And not in the way I'd been hoping to be a couple of minutes ago.

But then the already crazy morning got even crazier. My eyes fell on the little girl - who'd turned around when I'd called her – and when her eyes locked on me again, a huge smile lit up her tiny face, like she'd just won a shopping spree at F.A.O Schwartz or something.

But _that_ wasn't even the crazy shit. The crazy shit was _my_ reaction to that smile. That…that _thing_ inside my chest clenched tightly again, and I swore I felt it grow two sizes; like I'd just returned a bag full of presents to the citizens of Whoville or some shit. I couldn't even help the wide grin that covered my own face in response, regardless of the fact that Rosalie now stood a few feet from me, her hands on her hips and eyeing me suspiciously. Like a warden out of friggin' Alcatraz.

I ignored her for the moment while I studied the little girl. She was definitely a beauty. Tiny – no more than five I'd say, with a face like a porcelain doll. Her long, brown hair flowed almost to her waist. Her big brown eyes looked like pools of melted chocolate, and her little button nose turned up slightly at the end, like a little cherub. I suddenly got the strange urge to protect this little girl, to keep her safe from everything and everyone that would ever want to mess with her.

Abruptly, she skipped back over to me and stopped just inches away.

"I'm sorry mistuh! I fowgot to say thank you. But my mommy would be looking fuh me and I didn't want huh to wouwy. Thank you!" she exclaimed, looking much happier than she had just a few seconds ago.

"You're very welcome," I chuckled, ignoring the way Rosalie's eyes were piercing a hole through my brain. At that moment, I couldn't have cared less about the shitload of grief I knew I was in for.

The little angel hugged her doll close to her and gave her a soft kiss on the head, looking up at me through long, dark eyelashes. Just then, the brunette reached her.

"Maddie," she breathed, both relief and slight reproach in her tone. "I told you to stay in my cube while I went to the copy room. You almost gave me a heart attack." She knelt down and hugged the little girl to her.

"I had to get Angie mommy," the little girl explained, her voice muffled in her mother's hair. Hair that I was now noticing was the same exact shade as her daughter's. "The nice man heeuh found huh fuh me."

"He did?" the brunette asked, pulling her daughter far enough away so that she could look into her tiny face. "Did you thank him?"

"Uhuh," she answered sweetly, but looked back up at me. "Thank you so much mistuh!" she repeated.

"Call me Edward," I encouraged, surprised by the mellowness in my own voice. I couldn't remember ever having used that tone. "Mister is my father," I added, and then regretted it right away. I could've listened to her call me 'mistuh' all day.

The little girl giggled.

"Thank you, Edwood," she corrected herself.

My mouth turned up in a smile. Scratch that. I could listen to her call me 'Edwood' all day.

And then my smile faltered.

Rosalie decided to open her mouth.

"Edward. Emmett told me you were back from your extended _business_ trip. What are you doing on this floor?" She looked pointedly at me, arching one perfectly shaped eyebrow and then looking behind me towards Lauren. I chanced a quick look back and almost cringed at Lauren's obviously guilty expression, like someone who'd just swallowed a canary.

It wouldn't have made a difference anyway. There were many names I liked to call my sister-in-law Rose, but 'stupid' wasn't one of them. She'd seen Lauren making her not-too-subtle moves on me on a few occasions, and I could see the wheels churning in her head. I hesitated for just a split second before turning to face her.

"I had a meeting with Lauren this morning on the Wheat-a-Bits account," I lied as smoothly as possible. I couldn't help the irritation that seeped into my voice though. Rosalie had a curious way of forgetting who was who's boss around here. True, she was married to my brother Emmett, and that, combined with her undeniable talent and big balls gave her as much power as I had around here. But shit, would it fucking kill her to at least _pretend_ to let me be in charge in front of the rest of the employees? I mean damn, it was _my_ last name on the Agency's plaque downstairs in the building lobby.

(But I guess it was hers too, by marriage. Even if she was one of those hyphenating women, as in Rosalie Hale-Cullen).

And true to character, Rosalie was in no mood to disappoint today.

"Really?" she questioned, arching her eyebrow amazingly higher.

I always wondered how women did that.

She crossed her arms in front of her. "Well, since Lauren works for _me_, how come _I_ didn't know about this meeting?"

Oh yeah. She was out for blood.

And being the ass that I was often accused of being (namely by Rose), I let her goading get to me, and responded with the worst possible answer I could've given.

"Because I'm the boss, and I don't have to clear my meetings with you."

I regretted the words as soon as they were out of my mouth. But the brunette was still kneeling in front of her daughter, and I could feel her eyes on me. And for some strange reason, I didn't want to look like an ass in front of her.

Rose's eyebrow arched impossibly higher, almost right off her forehead. Her nostrils flared. Never mind Emmett and Jasper. Rosalie was going to castrate me herself. And probably right here, in front of the little princess and her mom.

So much for not looking like an ass.

But Rosalie was always professional, no matter what. Her eyes flared with anger, but she said nothing. That offered me no relief whatsoever. I knew from experience that just meant she was biding her time, and that I was going to get the royally fucked treatment for that one some time in the not-so-distant future. I swallowed hard, but otherwise kept my face blank. She was like those rabid dogs, you couldn't show her any fear or else she'd come in for the kill.

"Hmph," Rose finally said before refocusing her irritation in Lauren's direction. "Are the touch-ups for those elves I sent you ready yet?" she barked. Lauren jumped at Rosalie's tone, and I had to suppress my laughter. The overeager witch deserved it, after the way she'd spoken to the little princess.

"Um…not yet," Lauren answered timidly. _Yeah, now she was timid_. "They were next on my to-do list."

Rosalie smirked. "Yes. I'm sure they were next on your _to-do _list," she drawled, glaring from me back to Lauren. "Make sure you have those on my desk before noon," she demanded. Lauren nodded quickly and high-tailed it back to her cube.

Rosalie turned her glare back to me. I stared back at her defiantly, refusing to be the first to look away. But then I heard that sweet little nightingale voice again, and without thinking twice, my attention turned back to the little princess, my curiosity about what she was saying taking precedence over everything else at the moment.

"Mommy," she asked, her big brown eyes looking pleadingly at the pretty brunette in front of her, "can I come with you to the copy woom? I want to make a copy of my hand again."

The princess's mom stood up quickly and took the little girl by the hand. Her eyes flickered momentarily towards Rosalie and me before turning herself and her little girl around and trying to walk away as quickly as possible without actually dragging the little girl. Someone had apparently given her the memo about running the other way when Rose came around.

"Um, maybe later baby. Mommy has to finish up some work first," she whispered to the little girl while she tugged her along.

And I should've made a run for it too; tried to get away from Rosalie before she really got down and dirty. But for some reason, I was frozen to my spot and couldn't look away from the little girl and her mom.

"Bella, can I talk to you for a moment please?" Rose called out. Her voice was authoritative, but the venom that had been lacing it just a few moments earlier was gone. Still, I could tell by her tone that she wanted to have a few words with the little girl's mom, Bella.

_Bel-la_. I liked the way the name flowed in my mind.

_Bel-la_ stopped dead in her tracks at Rosalie's request. With her back still to us, she drew in a sharp breath before turning around with a look of defeat on her pale face.

And once again, I got that strange, overwhelming feeling I'd gotten just a few minutes ago towards the little princess. The desire to stay and protect – but this time it was directed towards her mom.

What the hell was going on with me here today?

I took advantage as _Bel-la_ approached Rose and me warily and got a good look at her.

She and her daughter shared a striking similarity. They both had the same long brown hair; but where the little girls' was straight, Bella's was wavy, thick and shiny. They had the same striking brown eyes, a soft warm brown that made me think of chocolate and warm nights and just a general sense of contentment.

What the hell?

Bella's complexion was fairer than her daughter's, yet it had a healthy glow to it. And as she reached us and stood before Rose anxiously, I realized just how beautiful she was. It wasn't that in-your-face beauty, like Rose had. It was a more natural beauty; a beauty that didn't need tons of makeup to stand out. A beauty that you sometimes didn't appreciate fully until it was right in front of you.

Well, it was right in front of me now.

Rose looked down at the little girl first, who was holding on tightly to her mom's hand.

"Hey Maddie," she began, in a gentle voice I'd never heard her use in the whole ten years I'd known her, "did you know you can see almost all of Central Park from those windows there?" She pointed at a set of windows a few feet away from us. Maddie's eyes widened in surprise and she shook her head. "Well, you can! And a bunch of Manhattan, and super tall buildings, and if you look really hard, you can even see some of New Jersey just across the river," Rose added in a hypnotic tone. "Why don't you go take a look and tell me what you see?" she coaxed.

Maddie turned to her mom excitedly. "Can I mommy?" she pleaded, looking up at her mom with those big brown eyes.

Her mom nodded her head in approval. "Sure, go ahead," she encouraged. Maddie turned away and skipped happily toward the windows, while the three of us stood there smiling at her retreating form.

As soon as she was out of earshot, Rose turned back to Bella and pursed her lips.

"Bella, this is the second time this week," she began, but Bella cut her off.

"I know Rosalie, I know. I'm really sorry. I'm doing my best to get this taken care of."

I wondered what the problem was.

"Shouldn't she be in school or something?" I thought out loud.

Bella's eyes flew to me as soon as I'd spoken the words, and she shot me a look that surprised me. It clearly said 'mind your fucking business asshole.' But she said nothing and turned back to Rose.

"She hasn't adjusted well to the last couple of pre-schools I've tried. She's not used to all the commotion. Back home she just had a babysitter, and even that was just for a few hours each day. She's not used to being away from me for so long, or with so many people."

Rose sighed. "Bella, I sympathize, I really do."

I looked at her and smirked. How the hell could she sympathize with something like that? As far as I knew, she didn't have any kids, and if she did, she'd neglected to mention them to my brother when they got married.

Rose either didn't see my smirk or chose to ignore it. "Maddie's a sweetie, and she doesn't bother at all when she's here. It's just that if I continue to let you bring her in, others around here are going to want to bring their kids in too. And with clients walking in and out all the time, how would it look to have so many children running around this office?"

I chuckled. "Hey maybe we can change the Agency name to Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock, Childcare Center?" I joked.

This time both women glared openly at me. And while I was used to being glared at by Rose, Bella's angry gaze made me wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.

Rose sneered at me. "Bella, in case you haven't figured it out yet, this…_gentleman_ here – I rolled my eyes at her sarcastic tone – "is my brother-in-law, Edward Cullen, one of the co-owners of the agency. He's been away for a few weeks, so you haven't had a chance to meet him yet. He doesn't usually spend so much time on our floor" –she smirked- "so you probably won't be running in to him too much, other than client meetings or conferences. _Official_ conferences," she added under her breath, only meant for me to hear. "Edward, this is our new Graphic Artist, Isabella Swan. She goes by Bella."

Bella turned begrudgingly towards me. Her cheeks suddenly flushed with the most amazing crimson color, but her expression was impassive, her lips drawn in a tight line. She refused to meet my eyes as she mumbled a polite, yet perfunctory "How do you do?"

At that moment, I knew she knew. She'd figured out what the whole conference room debacle a few minutes ago had been about, and Rosalie's little comment a few seconds ago had probably confirmed it. For some reason, I felt my own face flood with shame and, strangely enough…guilt.

I replied nervously, "Nice to meet you." I couldn't understand why her obvious dislike for me upset me so much.

"Anyway," Rose broke in, and for once I was grateful for her interruptions, "as I was saying, you've got to find-"

"How old is she?" I asked, earning an exasperated sigh from Rosalie and another pointed glare from Bella.

"Excuse me?" Bella questioned with a frown.

"Maddie. Um…your daughter," I clarified. I wasn't sure if she'd want me addressing her daughter by name. "How old is she?" I repeated.

"She's four," Bella answered slowly, narrowing her eyes at me warily. "Why?"

"Um…well I was just thinking" and as I spoke I really hated myself, because I NEVER said 'Um'. 'Um' as far as I was concerned, was a syllable reserved for idiots and people who had nothing worthwhile to say.

But damn if that wasn't exactly what I felt like now.

"Does she have to be in school?" I asked.

Bella narrowed her eyes at me further, but didn't respond.

Rosalie on the other hand spoke to me in an exasperated voice. "Edward, she _can't_ come here every day, we simply aren't set up to take care of children." She turned her whole body directly towards me and shot me a look that clearly said, _'I know you're just trying to get laid here so cut the shit out!'_

I ignored her implication and continued speaking, my eyes on Rosalie now.

"Because if she doesn't have to be in school yet, _Rosalie_, maybe she can go to a babysitter?" I offered.

Bella responded quickly in an annoyed tone. "I can't find anyone I can trust-"

"Rose, doesn't the Agency keep a list of approved child care workers?" I wasn't very familiar with it, but I thought I'd heard of something like that being talked about a couple of times around the office.

Rose stared at me suspiciously for a split second before turning her attention to Bella.

"Actually, he's right Bella. We do keep a list of approved child care workers to help our employees with families. Every child care worker on the list has had their credentials fully checked out by our HR Department. HR makes sure the child care workers on the list remain up to date with all their CPR and other child care related trainings, and they even compile a list of references from our own employees for each child care worker."

Bella's big brown eyes grew even wider with surprise. "I…I didn't know about that," she stammered, looking between Rose and me.

"Why don't you go up to HR and look into it?" I suggested gently, afraid that she'd shoot me another death glare.

"Um…yes, I think I will. Thanks for the information. I'll go up there on my lunch break," she murmured shyly now. That unbelievable shade of red crossed her cheeks again as she spoke, and she looked away from me quickly and down to the floor. I had an overwhelming urge to lift her chin towards me so I could see how long that color would actually stay on her cheeks.

At that moment, I also decided that the word 'Um' couldn't possibly be reserved for just idiots and people who had nothing worthwhile to say. Because it was obvious by just looking at her that Bella Swan was anything but an idiot, and I found myself extremely intrigued to know what she had to say, about anything and everything.

"Actually Bella," Rosalie chimed in "it's still fairly early in the morning, and it should be a slow day. Why don't you head up there now, since it might take you a while to sort through everything and get in touch with any references you may want to contact?"

Bella's face lit up with gratitude. She breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks Rosalie. I am pretty anxious to take a look at that list now," she confirmed.

"Don't thank me too much Bella," Rose snickered in a tone that was supposed to be intimidating, but I could tell she wasn't putting as much effort into it as she usually did. "I just want this whole business taken care of ASAP. I need to make sure that when you're here, your mind is one-hundred percent focused on work," she finished in a serious tone.

"I'll try to take care of it right away Rosalie. I promise," Bella affirmed.

She turned to leave, ready to go claim her little girl from the window, but then paused for a split second before turning back. Her brown eyes focused in on me, and that thing inside me gave a startled jump.

_What the hell was that?_

"Thanks again…Edward," she offered in a low voice, her cheeks turning red again. A strange warmth coursed through me at the sound of my name from her lips.

"You're welcome…Bella," I managed to respond, my voice as low as hers.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Rosalie eyeing me curiously, but I kept my eyes on Bella. It was a much more pleasant sight than my annoying sister-in-law slash co-worker.

Bella turned away from me quickly. "Maddie sweetie, we have to go upstairs for something. Come on," she called in a soothing voice.

"You mean on the elevaytuh mommy?" Maddie asked excitedly, skipping back to her mother.

"Yes honey." Bella responded, putting her hand out so that Maddie could take it.

"Yay! I love the elevaytuh" Maddie exclaimed.

As she passed us with her hand securely in her mom's, she addressed us politely. "Bye Miss Wosalie. Bye Mistuh Edwood."

Rose smiled at her and I chuckled heartily. "It's just Edward princess. And may I call you Maddie?" I asked, looking between her and Bella. Bella gave her daughter a smile and nodded.

"Shooah. It's my name," Maddie answered with a shrug, as if I'd just asked the most inane question. We all laughed.

"Okay. See you laytuh," she exclaimed as her mother led her out to the elevator banks.

I watched them disappear through the doors to the elevators, and then turned back to Rosalie.

She was staring at me again with that weird, curious look of hers.

"What?"

Rose seemed to debate whether to answer for a couple of seconds, which in and of itself was strange. Because Rosalie _never_ debated whether to speak or not.

"Don't even think about it," she finally blurted out in a hushed voice. "She's not your type."

I snorted. "First of all, I don't know what the hell you're talking about. Second of all, what do you know about what my type is?"

Rose sucked her teeth and pursed her lips, giving me a look that said 'Seriously?'

"You know very well what the hell I'm talking about. Don't think I didn't catch you checking her ass out while she walked away." I chuckled guiltily and started walking. It had been a _very_ nice ass actually. "And based on your activities this morning," she continued, "your type has apparently been downgraded to anything with a willing hoohah between its legs."

I stopped in my tracks and turned to glare at her. "Seriously, you have to be the most crass woman I've ever met."

Rose smirked and moved in closer, taunting me. "Anyway, trust me, you couldn't handle someone like Isabella Swan."

I scowled, looking down at her with a look that usually intimidated the hardest of men. But Rosalie just stepped in closer, giving me her own intimidating glare.

"Trust me dear sister-in-law, you have _no_ idea what I can and can't handle." She stared at me and gave me one hard chuckle, completely unfazed. I turned and started walking again, and she fell in step next to me, switching into prosecutor mode again. I sighed and continued looking straight ahead.

"So what the hell was that in the conference room?" she hissed, turning to face me as we walked. I flinched slightly and groaned internally. I'd been stupidly hoping she'd forgotten about that. I kept walking without answering, hoping she'd just give up. But she walked along with me, refusing to let me get away.

"That was nothing," I finally replied in a low and even tone.

"Bullshit!" she hissed, lowering her voice even further. "What the hell is your problem Edward? Do you know how dangerous that little stunt could've been? Do you have any idea what could've happened if anyone other than that little girl had found you two in there?"

"Maddie didn't see anything," I hissed back. For some reason, the thought of the little girl seeing me with Lauren made my stomach turn. And then for some stranger reason, I pictured her mother being the one standing outside that door when we'd walked out. I suddenly felt like gagging.

"That's not the point!" Rosalie continued. "That little stunt of yours could've gotten us all in a shitload of trouble!"

"You know, you're such a damn hypocrite!" I retaliated, on the defensive even though I knew she was right. "You think I don't know what's really going on when you and your hubby close the door for your 10 minute meetings?"

Rose smirked. "That's different Edward and you know it. We only do that when the rest of the employees have gone home, after hours. You know no matter what, Emmett would never risk the reputation of the Agency that way."

Once again, I knew she was right. But knowing that made me feel even shittier. Because that's what I'd almost done. I'd almost risked the company's reputation for a quick piece of ass. And we'd all worked too hard to get where we were for me to go blow it all like that.

"When are you gonna grow up Edward?" Rosalie admonished as we headed towards her office. "When are you going to realize you're not some young frat boy anymore? You're twenty-eight years old for God's sakes. You run one of Money Magazine's top 10 new Agency's of the Decade. You belong to one of the most powerful and well-respected families on the East Coast. Yet you can't seem to keep your name out of the Page Six headlines and the tabloids. When are you going to finally get your head out of your ass and realize your potential?"

We walked into her office and she shut the door behind us, walking over to her desk and sitting down all queen-like on her black leather chair.

Why had I followed her in here? Why was I subjecting myself to this speech? I could've just gone back upstairs to my own office and saved myself this aggravation.

Except that, as much of a pain in the ass as Rosalie was, as much as she and I butted heads and argued, deep down - so deep that I rarely acknowledged it to myself, much less to anyone else - I actually loved and respected my sister-in-law. And even though she was tearing me a new hole right now, I knew I deserved it.

But I'd never acknowledge that to her.

I sat down on one of her guest chairs and put my hands behind my head, interlacing my fingers together.

"Do you know how much you sound like my father right now?" I teased her. "For someone who's only twenty-seven, you sound more like a fifty-year old," I goaded.

Her eyes flared and she pursed her lips, shaking her head at me viciously. "You're a real asshole. I'm trying to give you some advice here and you're being a jerk. When are you finally going to start thinking with that head on your shoulders instead of with the one between your legs?"

I sneered at her. "Jesus, I see why you and Emmett got together in the first place. You have to be the two most vulgar people I've ever known."

She snorted, very unladylike. "Oh yeah…because you're the patron saint of decency," she laughed.

I had to laugh with her on that one. I hadn't been the paparazzi's golden boy for the past few years for nothing. I was in the gossip pages of one or the other of those tabloids and magazines at least a couple of times a week. And even though half of the things they printed were total bullshit, I couldn't have cared less. It was no one's business how I lived my life anyway. And all the girls who got their pictures taken with me over the years didn't seem to mind the attention. Sure, every now and then one of my crazy exploits would earn me a tongue-lashing from either my parents or one of my siblings, but hey, I was young and free. I had no one but myself to answer to. And as much as Rosalie liked to say otherwise, I worked hard helping to build this Agency to where we were today, and they all knew it. I put my heart and soul into this company, and I deserved to have my distractions.

In a round-about way, that brought me to my next question.

"So tell me about the new Graphic Artist. When'd she start?"

Rosalie watched me through narrowed eyes before answering. "She started a couple of weeks ago, a few days after you left on your latest adventure."

"What's her background? Where'd she come from?" I figured I'd start with basics.

Rose inspected her well-manicured nails while she spoke. "She's actually a relocation from the Northwest. She attended the University of Washington. This is her first position in an ad agency, but her designs impressed me. Anything else?"

I glared at Rose. "Married?"

Rose sighed dramatically, still inspecting her nails. "Divorced. _With_ a kid, obviously."

I sucked my teeth. "Shit, you're really going to make me drag every bit of info out of your mouth, aren't you?"

Rose looked back up at me, an angry glint in her eyes now. "Look, I've told you everything you're required to know as her employer. Even more actually." She leaned across her desk. "Are we done now, _boss_?" -she hissed the last word sarcastically- "Because I've got some real work to get to now."

This was her pay back for the 'boss' incident in front of Lauren and Bella. I knew I wasn't going to get anything else from her now. I glowered at her for a few seconds, but she simply smiled back at me evilly. Frustrated, I stood up and stormed out of her office, slamming her door behind me and stalking to the elevator bank.

_Bel-la…_

The name resounded in my head, repeating itself like a chorus. Those large brown eyes had intrigued me; that was for damn sure. But as I pressed down impatiently on the 'Up' button for the elevator, I realized it didn't matter that Rose had refused to give me more information on the new Graphic Artist. I'd gathered all the information that I'd really need on my own this morning.

She had a kid. Maddie.

Granted, the kid was the most beautiful and sweet little girl I'd ever laid eyes on. But she was still a kid.

Baggage.

The last thing I needed was to get involved with someone with a kid. It just wasn't conducive to my lifestyle. I liked partying, drinking, coming and going as I pleased. I wasn't the type to let anything tie me down, or to – God help me – commit to anyone. Just the thought made me shudder. And I was pretty sure a kid was the biggest tie-down of all.

No. Way.

Isabella Swan and her big brown eyes and blushing cheeks and thick wavy hair were definitely on my hands-off list. And even though a part of me had an unexplainable urge to find out every bit of information I could on her, I wasn't going to give in. She wasn't what I needed in my life.

Then I chuckled once to myself as I recalled those dagger-infested looks she'd thrown at me earlier. I was pretty sure Isabella Swan had no desire to get to know me either.

And that was fine by me. It was a big enough agency where our paths wouldn't have to cross very often. We were both on different floors, and she reported to Rose, not to me.

_'Just stay away from her'_ I told myself as I got on the elevator back up to my floor.

When I got back to my office, I sat down heavily on my own big leather chair. I swiveled around to gaze out of my floor-to-ceiling windows, at the city outside. New York City. The City that never sleeps. If you could make it here, you'd make it anywhere.

The bright blue sky above was perfectly clear today, not a cloud to be seen for miles. The warmth radiating through the windows into the office on this late August morning should've come from the bright yellow sun shining from above the skyscrapers surrounding me. Yet when I looked up, it wasn't the blue skies, or the yellow sun that I saw. It was two warm brown orbs - sparkling with undiscovered secrets - that were filling me with the unexplained heat now coursing through my insides. They saturated me with a glowing warmth the likes of which I'd never felt before.

_What. The. Fuck?_

* * *

**A/N: Alright guys. What do you think? What kind of impression would our Eddie have made on you? **

**I've got a couple of more chapters written out, just need to get them Beta'd so you should have the first few chapters within days of each other. Then it'll probably be a week or so between chapters.**

**Hit the little button below and give me your thoughts. **


	2. Chapter 2 We're Not Always As We Seem

**A/N: Some more background info in this chapter. Some more questions raised; some answered. Don't worry, everything will be answered eventually. Some of you are speculating about who Maddie's dad is. You'll find out soon. Bella hasn't had it easy, as you'll all start to see soon. **

**And it seems that everyone has fallen in love with little Maddie. She is adorable; I know. **

**Thanks to my darling Beta Danna0724. She's a busy little bee, but she still manages to catch my many blunders and add her own two cents to make this story make sense! Love ya girly!**

**All characters in this story belong to Stephenie Meyer; I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a while.**

_Things_ _are not always as they seem; the first appearance deceives many.__** – Phaedrus (Roman Poet).**_

**BPOV**

**Chapter 2 – Not Always As It Seems**

Maddie and I sat on the soft, black leather sofa in the waiting area of the Human Resources Department. I watched my daughter as she spoke quietly to her little rag doll Angie, her safety doll.

"But Angie, I was only gone a little while. Besides, the nice man took good care of you. He protected you from the mean lady."

I inclined my head and stared at her curiously. I could feel the worry lines creasing my forehead. "Sweetie, what nice man and mean lady are you talking about?"

My daughter looked up at me innocently, with those big brown eyes so much like my own, yet filled with a softness and trust that mine would never again possess. "The nice man we met downstairs mommy," she replied matter-of-factly, and then her face scrunched up into a cute little scowl, "and that mean lady that was in the room with him."

I bit my lip, trying to hold in the expletive that was on the tip of my tongue. I'd hoped Maddie hadn't realized that Mr. Cullen and Lauren had been locked in the conference room together, but as usual, my daughter had been extremely observant. Of course, being only four, she had no idea what she'd witnessed, and I was definitely not going to enlighten her. She didn't need to know the type of behavior adults with no morals engaged in. I'd shield her from that type of knowledge for the rest of my life if I could. A part of me thought of how ironic it was that it was keeping her from that type of knowledge that had us here in this city instead of home in Forks right now. Yet as I thought of that I also wondered what it was that had her calling Mr. Edward Cullen a 'nice man', while Lauren took the title of 'mean lady'. I personally thought they were both disgusting pieces of shit.

Not that he wasn't one of, if not _the_, most perfect looking specimen of a man I'd ever laid eyes on. Holy Hell, the pictures of him in the newspapers and magazines did him no justice! Not that I'd ever gone out of my way to buy one of those mags or read one of the articles about him. But they were pretty hard to avoid. His face showed up on either one of the gossip newspapers or magazines pretty regularly. And based on the crooked grin that almost always plastered his face, he enjoyed the attention tremendously. Cocky son-of-a-bitch.

But as I'd rounded the corner downstairs a few minutes ago, looking for my Maddie, and come face to face with the one owner of the Agency I hadn't met yet, the initial impression I'd received from him had been completely different. He'd been holding out Angie, Maddie's doll; his arm outstretched as he gazed down sweetly at my daughter, and my heart had stopped momentarily. Both from relief at having found Maddie, even though she'd only been out of my sight for a couple of minutes and I knew she had to be somewhere nearby, but also from the sight of this beautiful man gazing down at my daughter with a look of total innocence and bewilderment. It had momentarily stunned me that a man like this, who'd _never_ met Maddie before in his life, could look at her with more awe and emotion than her own father ever had. I'd felt my eyes grow wide with shock. But before I could make heads or tails of the scene in front of me, I'd noticed Lauren, one of the other Graphic Artists in our department, with her head sticking out guiltily from the small conference room. As I'd looked between her and Mr. Cullen, their actions had become plainly obvious to me. Lauren's hair was a disheveled mess, very different from the carefully coiffed hairstyle she'd been sporting earlier this morning. Her skirt was skewed and the top two buttons on her blouse were undone. And Edward Cullen's shirt was a crumpled mess, his pants all wrinkled, and his hair pointing in fifty different directions. Very unlike the impeccably dressed playboy that graced the gossip columns. I'd had to hold in a disgusted snort.

And as if their clothes hadn't been a dead give-away, the look of horror that crossed Edward Cullen's face as Rosalie appeared behind him completely confirmed my suspicions. He was totally busted, and he knew it. Yet instead of acting contrite at having been caught with his hands in the cookie jar, or up that skanky Lauren's shirt, he tried to play the "I'm the boss" card with Rosalie. If he hadn't actually been the boss and I hadn't been scared as hell at having been busted by Rosalie myself with Maddie here again, I would've laughed out loud when Rose gave him the 'I'm gonna fucking hang you by the balls when I get you alone' look after he got smart with her. _'Good for his dirty ass,'_ I'd thought to myself.

But part owner of the Agency or not, I hadn't been able to suppress the 'shut the fuck up and mind your own goddamn business' look I'd given him when I'd thought he was going to give me trouble about Maddie. I may not have been the most business-savvy person, but I more or less knew the hierarchy in this Agency. Edward Cullen, along with his older brother Emmett, and his college friend Jasper Whitlock, had started this Agency five years ago. In the past five years, it had grown into one of the top five marketing agencies in the Northeast, and one of the top ten in the country. The trade publications all credited the Agency's success to the immense hard work, dedication, and talent all three men possessed in different aspects of the marketing field.

However, Rosalie Hale-Cullen, Emmett's wife of three years, had come to work for the privately-owned Agency a couple of years ago. The marketing field had immediately hailed her as an invaluable asset to the company, and her extreme talent and hard work had earned the Agency some of its biggest and most important accounts. Today, Rosalie Hale-Cullen was as much a boss in the company as the Cullen brothers and Mr. Whitlock were. It was she that had hired me a couple of weeks ago. And as such -and knowing that her word was just as important in this Agency as that of the three men whose names appeared on the plaque in the lobby downstairs- I was sure that it was her I had to answer to, not to this man in front of me who'd just been fondling one of his employees and who now had the balls, I thought, to be giving me hell for bringing my daughter to work.

So I'd been completely taken off guard when he'd actually brought up the child-care list available up here in HR. And just like that, he'd confused me again. Because why would this selfish, immoral and cocky man care about my problems with my little girl? And why had he looked all nervous and confused? Like there was something he wanted to say, or ask me? And why did I have this overwhelming urge to touch him, to put my hand on his arm and give him a grateful squeeze, when he softly suggested that I come up to Human Resources?

I shook my head now, trying to clear it and focus on what I'd come up here for; to see if I could finally find someone I could trust my baby to during work hours. I had to stop thinking of Edward Cullen. Regardless of how helpful he'd been by telling me about the Agency's Child Care List, the fact was that he was an obvious player, and more than that, my boss. He was exactly the kind of person I didn't need in my life. The man could literally have any woman on this planet. And from what I'd heard and read, and now seen for myself, it was not beyond him to try to do just that. We were in two different worlds, and when you could have caviar, the only reason you'd try deviled eggs would be to experiment. And I was done being anyone's experiment. I chuckled to myself, because this was Edward freakin' Cullen I was thinking about. He didn't need to try deviled eggs. The only reason he'd probably even thought of the Child Care list was to make sure that as one of his employees, I worked at my full potential, without having to worry about how my little girl was doing all day.

I looked back at Maddie. My little Maddie. I still wasn't sure if I'd made the right decision for us, for her, by bringing us to this big city where we knew no one. But Forks had just gotten…unbearable. I missed my dad. I missed Jake…But even that had gotten so hard…

"Ms. Swan, here's the list you needed," came a voice from behind where we sat, breaking me out of my reverie. Mrs. Cope, the Human Resources Manager was handing me the well-researched Child Care List. I quickly snapped back to the present and stood up to take the list from her, holding it with reverence and hope that this paper might finally hold the answer to a peaceful night's sleep. Peace that had eluded me since I'd first arrived in New York City a little over two weeks ago to work as a Graphic Artist in this Agency, a job I'd somehow managed to get after two initial interviews with CCW headhunters in Seattle before Rosalie herself had flown down to interview me. And standing here, almost 6 weeks after that interview, I still didn't know how I'd managed to impress such a difficult woman enough to convince her to hire _me_, a woman fresh out of college, a few years older than most graduating in my class, with no real experience in the field, and who would cost the company relocating costs. I'd graduated at the top 5% of my class, that was true, but I was sure Rosalie could've found someone better qualified than me in this big city. All these weeks later, I still wasn't sure what had possessed her to go recruit across the country, rather than in her own back yard.

"Thank you, Mrs. Cope." I smiled up at the kind woman before sitting back down next to my daughter to peruse the list. I took a quick glance through it and noticed there were about 30 names on the list, some of them were names of people, while some of them were names of child-care centers, nursery schools, and the like. Before moving to New York City, my dad's old friend Sue Clearwater had taken care of Maddie while I went to work and school over in Port Angeles. Between my dad and me, we were able to juggle our schedules so that one of us was with her most of the day. So Maddie wasn't used to being around a bunch of kids. I knew it was something she had to get used to eventually, she'd be starting Kindergarten next year, but this move to New York had been such a traumatic and life-altering experience to her little mind to begin with, throwing her in with a bunch of other children was making it even harder for her to adjust.

But at the same time, I knew no one here. No one I could trust enough to watch her while I was at work. This list sounded like a godsend. The Agency had put their trust and reputation into the names on this list. Next to each name, just as Rosalie had mentioned, were the names and phone numbers of Agency employees who trusted their children to these people, and who I could call as references. As my eyes scanned the list, I could feel my tense muscles relaxing slightly for the first time in weeks, as my hope that I'd find someone reliable on this list increased.

My eyes stopped at a name. Sue Collins.

It was the same first name as Maddie's caretaker back in Forks. But it was her address that caught my eye. She seemed to be located just a few blocks from our apartment in Brooklyn, in a little neighborhood called DUMBO, which is where the Agency had been able to find me a place that I could afford. Next to Sue's name was a long list of contacts, Agency numbers, which meant that I could call them right now and hopefully get there opinions on this Sue now.

"Mommy, can we go back down to your cube now?" Maddie asked quietly. She'd been sitting patiently next to me while I scanned the list.

"Just a few minutes baby, and then we'll go back down," I whispered as I pulled out my cell phone and started dialing the first reference on the list. My cube downstairs wasn't very private; I had people on either side of me, and I didn't really want them hearing me make these phone calls. No one else besides Maddie and me were out here in the HR Waiting Area, so I'd have more privacy making the phone calls from here.

Maddie didn't answer, but her little brown eyes registered her disappointment, and she looked down and began talking to her doll quietly again. I immediately felt guilty. My poor daughter shouldn't have had to be sitting in a boring office all day. She should've been out in the fresh air somewhere, having fun, with kids her own age. For the thousandth and one time, I questioned my decision to move us to New York. She could've at least been running around in the fresh beach air right now, with Sue Clearwater and her granddaughter, instead of trapped within these four walls…

The first reference answered. It was another woman who worked for CCW and who'd taken her son to Sue Collins for two years before he started Kindergarten. She had nothing but wonderful things to say about Sue. I spoke to her for about five minutes before calling the next reference. It was a man this time, whose daughter had gone to Sue Collin's about 4 years ago, when the Agency was still very new. Again, he had nothing but high praises for Sue. She was responsible, caring and trustworthy. She wasn't the type to keep the children home in front of a TV all day. She took them to the park, the zoo, lunches out. I called the next reference. This next woman informed me that Sue still took care of her 10 year old daughter after school. The school bus dropped the girl off in front of Sue's house and the girl stayed there until one of her parents picked her up.

I was starting to feel lighter, as if a huge weight were being slowly lifted off of my chest. I called a few more references. Some didn't have their children going to Sue's anymore if the children were old enough to be in school full day. Some still had their children going to Sue's either full or part-time, a few days a week or for the full week, before school, after school, all varied schedules. But there was one thing they all agreed on, Sue Collins was Mary Poppins personified.

After about a half-hour of phone calls, I hung up with the last reference and dialed the number to Sue Collins herself, my heart feeling like it was ready to jump out of my chest from anticipation.

"Hello?" came a strong yet soothing female voice on the other end.

I crossed my fingers and continued.

Forty-five minutes later, Maddie and I were back in the elevator, headed out of the building this time and back to Brooklyn, to our own neighborhood. I'd had a pleasant phone call with Sue Collins, and we were on our way to meet her. I'd felt nothing but good vibrations emanating from her from our phone call, and she'd agreed to meet with me immediately after I'd explained to her that we'd just moved here from Washington and Maddie was having a bit of a hard time adjusting. She sounded genuinely sympathetic, and asked if she could meet Maddie today. From years of experience, she continued, she immediately knew once she met a child if they would thrive in her care.

I rushed into Rosalie's office, knowing full well I could possibly get fired for doing just that. But hell, at this point, if I didn't find someone capable and trusting to watch Maddie for me I'd have to quit by the end of the week anyway and return to Forks with my tail between my legs. I was basically out of options at this point. Luckily after explaining the situation to Rosalie and doing some serious groveling and promising to work through my lunch break for the rest of the week, she agreed to let me leave early.

Unfortunately, the elevator decided to go up one floor, instead of down. I huffed out some air and rolled my eyes, anxious to get going. As the doors began to close again, I pressed on the 'L' button impatiently, itching to be on ground level and to get to Brooklyn. But before the doors were fully closed, two strong hands appeared and pried the doors open.

Edward freakin' Cullen.

I had no idea why my heart stopped as he walked into the elevator. My pulse quickened and I felt the blood rush to my face. My hands felt sweaty all of a sudden, and I hoped Maddie didn't notice as she held my hand tightly.

Edward's eyes found mine immediately. He stepped in quickly and the doors closed behind him, trapping the three of us in here alone.

"Bella," he breathed, except to my overactive imagination it sounded like a sigh of relief or something, as if he'd been hoping to bump into me again all morning.

"Edward," I managed to respond in a weak voice. A huge, glorious crooked grin formed on his perfect lips, taking me completely by surprise. I blinked twice, like a dazed idiot, and it took me a couple of seconds to realize that I should probably at least offer a small smile back in return, or maybe even have addressed him formally, as "Mr. Cullen," even though everyone else went by first names in the office. It would be the polite thing to do, at least. As I stared at him, his smile faltered slightly. I realized I probably looked like a deer stuck in headlights, and that I was reacting exactly like an awestruck bimbo. I looked away immediately, trying to figure out why he was having this effect on me, and promising myself that he'd never know about it.

"Edwood!" I heard Maddie exclaim happily and when I looked down at my daughter she was wearing a blissful smile. It made me both happy and wistful at the same time; I hadn't seen a smile that carefree on her little face in a long time. Her baby brown eyes sparkled up at him expectantly.

"Maddie!" Edward responded, his voice matching her enthusiasm at seeing each other. I again wondered at the strange reaction they both seemed to have towards one another. He stood facing me and Maddie, his back to the elevator doors. "Where are you going?" he asked her, sounding genuinely interested. Out of the corner of my eye, my eyes focused intently on my daughter, I saw his eyes flicker back up to me momentarily before going back down to Maddie.

"We're going to Brootlyn!" Maddie responded cheerfully. "To meet my new babysittuh!" she continued.

"Aah, so the list seems to have helped then!" he exclaimed. He kept his eyes trained on Maddie. After a couple of awkward seconds, I wondered if he was waiting for me to say something. Either way, it was too late to respond now.

Edward's eyes came up to me. "So you're sneaking out early then huh?" he asked. When I looked over at him he had an eyebrow arched furtively, as if he were waiting for me to let him in on a little secret.

His arched eyebrow and the fact that he'd just accused me of sneaking sent a quick shot of irritation through me. He'd hit a nerve. I responded quickly and firmly. "No. I'm not sneaking out. I spoke to Rosalie and she knows perfectly well I'm leaving early. I'm going to make the time up later on in the week. _I_ don't sneak around."

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I wanted to kick myself. Not only did I sound guilty and defensive, I was sure I'd stressed the 'I' in my last sentence a little more than I'd meant to. I felt my face go hot.

Edward stared at me with an unreadable expression before finally speaking. "I was just kidding Bella. I didn't mean to imply anything." _'Unlike you just did,_' I finished for him in my mind. My cheeks burned with mortification. I'd just accused one of the owners of the Agency I worked for of being sneaky. Perfect.

Thankfully, he turned his attention back to Maddie. "So Brooklyn, huh? I've got a sister that lives in Brooklyn," he told Maddie, in a soft velvety voice. I bit my lip and stared at the elevator wall.

Of course. How could I have forgotten? Of course he'd be Alice Cullen's brother!

Alice Cullen had stormed like a little cyclone through the doors of the Art Department of CCW two days after I'd started working here. She'd walked right into Rosalie's office, unannounced and without knocking. I'd been sitting across from Rosalie, in an informal meeting, and she'd almost blinded me with the brilliant smile she'd shot at me before scurrying right up to Rosalie and exclaiming in a sweet yet excited voice,

"Barney's is having its twice yearly sale! Grab your purse and let's go!"

Rose had rolled her eyes at Alice before turning back to me. "Please excuse my rude sister-in-law, Alice Cullen. As the only one of the Cullen siblings without a stake in this company, she forgets it doesn't run itself."

"Yeah, yeah whatever," Alice had responded impatiently, bouncing up and down in front of Rosalie. "Say whatever you want, just grab your purse and let's go! You know the best things are the first to go!" she whined. And although I hated whiners, something about her way made me automatically smile.

"Alice," Rose continued in an exasperated tone, "you see I'm in the middle of a meeting. I can't leave now."

Alice turned to look at me, and her face lit up sweetly, her green eyes sparkling with barely contained energy. "So bring her with us! You can hold your meeting in the fitting room! You like shopping, don't you?" she asked me, but it sounded more like a plea.

"Um…" I'd mumbled, looking between Rosalie and her sister-in-law quickly, and not knowing what to respond. The truth was I hated shopping, but I got the feeling that that wouldn't deter little Alice Cullen from her little excursion. Not that I thought Rosalie would entertain the idea of a meeting in Barney's for a second.

Shockingly though, Rosalie looked right at me, as if waiting for my response to whether we should continue the meeting while trying on $800 leather skirts and $500 silk blouses.

That was my first clue that the Cullens were definitely in a class all their own.

"Uh, I guess we can continue this meeting later? Rosalie, I'll have those draft sketches ready for you when…"

Rosalie turned back to Alice, a smirk on her face. "Alice, Barney's will have to wait until after work." She turned to face me. "Bella, I think you've got a good handle on what I'm looking for. Get started on those sketches and I'll take a look at them later this afternoon."

And with that, I'd gotten up to leave, watching Alice Cullen glare at Rosalie with a sad pout on her face. Her face suddenly brightened again and she turned to look at me once more.

"Hey, are you the new Graphic Artist then? Rosalie mentioned you! You're the new girl from Washington!" she smiled at me eagerly.

"Uh, yes. I'm Isabella Swan. Bella, for short," I clarified in a low voice.

"Bella! That's a beautiful name!" she exclaimed. "So, how are you liking CCW so far? Is Rosalie treating you nicely?" -her eyes flickered to Rosalie quickly and she gave her a playful sneer- "How do you like New York City? Is it very different from Washington? Where do you live?" She shot each question out back to back, never giving me a chance to respond to any of them, until she got to her last one and waited quietly for my answers.

I wasn't exactly sure which question to respond to first. "CCW is wonderful so far, thanks. New York City seems nice, but I haven't really had a chance to see much of it so far. It's pretty different from where I grew up-"

"What do you mean you haven't had a chance to see the city yet?" she cried, shocked. "Where do you live?"

"I live in Brooklyn, in a neighborhood called DUMBO?" I clarified. "It's just-"

She cut me off again. "You're. Freaking. Kidding." She looked from me to Rosalie again. "Rose, why didn't you tell me she was living in DUMBO?" she asked with disbelief. Rosalie just pursed her lips and rolled her eyes again. She mumbled something incoherent, but it sounded like "…..Bella…..head start…..threw her…..your crazy ass."

Alice turned back to me. "Bella," she put one hand on her chest before continuing, "I live in DUMBO too! With Jasper, my fiancée! We have a cute little loft right by the river!" she continued with a huge, happy grin on her face. I smiled back at her warmly. Her smile was definitely contagious.

Even though I'd only been here for two days at that time, I already knew Jasper Whitlock, one of the owners, was engaged to Alice Cullen, sister of Emmett and Edward Cullen, the other two owners of the company. It seemed most of the employees in this agency, while hard working and dedicated to their jobs, also couldn't get enough of the Cullen's personal lives. And while I wasn't actively listening to any gossip, some of it made its way to my ears as I sat in my cube, or as I walked down the corridors, or in the elevators, or in the ladies' room, etc.

Alice had walked me back to my cube, chatting away excitedly, and we'd discovered we lived fairly close to each other. She was so full of energy, like an atom getting ready to explode. Yet I immediately felt a warm connection to her, feeling as if I'd found someone I could connect with in this big, demanding city. It made me feel strangely content to know she lived so nearby. She'd walked into my cube and immediately seen the picture I had of Maddie in the little 5x7 frame.

"Oh. My. God! Is this your daughter?" she'd cried, picking up the picture to admire it. I'd nodded my head proudly.

"She's an absolute angel! What's her name?"

"Maddie. Short for Madisen," I'd responded quietly.

"Madisen. Like Madison Avenue!" Alice had giggled.

I'd shrugged my shoulders. "I guess. Except with an 'e' at the end instead of an 'o'."

"That is such a cute name. It suits her perfectly. She's adorable."

"Thanks," I'd breathed, with obvious pride in my voice.

I'd seen Alice's eyes flicker quickly to my left hand, before going back to Maddie's picture. "So, you're married?" she'd asked trying to feign nonchalance.

"No. Divorced," I'd murmured.

"Oh. Sorry," she'd responded in a more subdued tone.

And for some reason, the honest look in her eyes made me answer in a way I'd never expected myself to, especially with someone who was practically a stranger. "Don't be. I'm sure as hell not."

Alice's eyes had registered surprise at my unexpected response. And out of the blue, we'd both broken out into quiet fits of laughter, until I felt tears stinging my eyes from the force of my outburst.

Alice's chortles finally died down and she looked at me with a sparkly gleam in her eyes. "Bella Swan" she'd declared, "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

So for the past couple of weeks, Alice would come down to the office a few times a week, and after visiting Jasper, she'd come down to our floor and pop in on Rosalie and me for a quick hello. I'd come to see that she and Rosalie were good friends. It was becoming obvious to me that the Cullen's were a tight knit family. Emmett came down to our floor a couple of times a day to see Rosalie. He was a huge, muscular and handsome man, and he had an infectious brawny laugh that could be heard across the entire floor when he was here. I'd met him in Rosalie's office my first day here, and he'd been very courteous. His green eyes matched his sister's, and both had the same wicked sparkle in their eyes.

I met Jasper the same day I met Alice. She'd come back down to say goodbye before she left and had dragged her fiancée down with her. And although he wasn't a Cullen, I couldn't help but notice how attractive Jasper Whitlock also was. He was tall and blond, with bright sky blue eyes, and a quiet disposition that immediately put you at ease. He apologized profusely to me for not having been down to introduce himself earlier, but he said he'd had some pressing matters to get to, and as he'd spoken I'd noticed the slight but present southern drawl he had, and it had made me smile.

So it was that I realized that the Cullen siblings, as well as their significant others, had the most amazing personalities I'd ever encountered, and I could immediately see why the public was so taken by the Cullen Clan. I'd found myself wondering if the last of the Cullen siblings that I had yet to meet, Edward Cullen, who'd been currently away on a business trip, would be as amazing as the rest of his family.

And on my first encounter with him, he'd been apparently holed up in a small conference room, feeling up one of my co-workers. So much for that great personality.

I was snapped back to the present by my daughter's response to Edward's comment about his sister.

"Really? We live in Brootlyn too! Right mommy?" Maddie tugged on my arm while waiting for my confirmation, and Edward looked back up at me.

"Yes honey." I answered quietly, keeping my eyes on her.

Maddie turned her attention back to her new hero. "Mommy's got a friend that lives in Brootlyn like us. She's really nice. She bought me ice-cream the other day when I was heuh!"

Thankfully, the elevator reached the lobby just as Maddie finished speaking. As the doors popped open, I let out a breath I hadn't even realized I'd been holding. Edward stepped out first and held his arm out to hold the elevator door.

"Thanks," I murmured as I stepped out with Maddie.

"Where are you going Edwood?" Maddie questioned as we walked through the lobby, with Edward on Maddie's other side.

"Oh, I'm just stepping out for a quick cup of coffee," he answered her gently.

"Mommy drinks coffee sometimes. Don't you mommy?" Maddie asked while pulling on my arm again.

"Sometimes," I agreed, keeping my eyes straight ahead and focusing on my footsteps. I'd always been more or less on the ungraceful side, and even though at 25, I'd finally outgrown my clumsiness, I still found myself tripping and stumbling every once in a while, and I wanted to make sure this wasn't one of those instances.

Edward looked back over at me. "Would you like a cup of-"

"No thank you." I answered quickly, not even giving him a chance to finish his sentence. I cringed internally, for my obvious rudeness, but I didn't want him to think I went around coaching my daughter to trick strangers into offering me a cup of coffee. The last thing I needed was Edward Cullen thinking I was one of his new groupies.

Edward simply nodded and looked away from me as we finally exited the building. It was a hot late-August day; he'd left his jacket upstairs, and had loosened his tie. I glanced at him quickly while he scanned the busy Manhattan streets, watching as the bright sun sparkled off of his emerald green eyes. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, he was good-looking. His strong, sharp profile was so perfect it appeared to be chiseled out of stone. His jaw was almost perfectly square, and I watched, almost mesmerized as his Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed; looking slightly nervous for some reason.

I noticed he wasn't wearing the same clothes he'd been wearing earlier. These pants, although dark like the ones he wore earlier this morning, were well ironed, and his white shirt was immaculate, not a wrinkle in it. His hair was still unruly, but as I watched him pass his hand quickly through it, I realized that it was _his_ hands that made it that way, rather than someone else's. For some reason, that knowledge brought with it a sense of relief. Not that it made any difference in my life, one way or the other. For some unexplained reason, the thought filled me with a sudden pang of sadness. But I had one and only one priority in my life; the little girl holding on tightly to my hand right now. And I neither wanted nor needed anything else.

Edward turned his eyes back to Maddie, but before she looked back up at him I thought I saw some confusion in his eyes. Yet as soon as she turned her attention back to him, that look disappeared and the look of awe that I'd thought I'd detected earlier returned. He gave her a huge, dazzling smile, and she giggled up at him, completely taken.

"Well Princess Maddie, it was truly the highlight of my day meeting you, and your fair mommy." He shot a quick glance up at me. I gave him a small, quick smile. Maddie continued giggling. "Will you promise to come visit us again soon?" he asked hopefully.

"If my mommy lets me," Maddie responded. She thought for a moment before continuing in an excited voice. "Can you come visit us in Brootlyn? I can show you my toys, and the fishing pole my grampa Charlie made me, and the dream catcha Uncoe Jake made me and my mommy" – Edward's eyes flickered quickly to me before smiling back down at Maddie – "and we can draw together, and mommy can show you her paintings, and we can be friends foreva," she finished hopefully.

My mouth hung open in stunned silence. My shy, four year old daughter had just invited a perfect stranger to our house, and what's more, had in one sentence opened up to him more than she'd opened up to anyone –except perhaps his sister Alice- since we'd arrived in this City. Including the teachers at the two pre-schools I'd tried with her so far. She hadn't mentioned my dad or Jake to _anyone_ since we'd gotten here, holding them and her memories of them like a secret she wasn't ready to share with anyone yet.

Edward also seemed to be taken back by Maddie's invitation, and unsure of how to answer her, he glanced up at me quickly.

"Um, Maddie honey, Edward's pretty busy my love. I'm sure he'd love to come see your toys but-" –I could see Maddie's face starting to fall, and the corners of her little mouth turning down –

"Tell you what," Edward began, cutting me off and looking at me as he spoke, "why don't you bring that fishing pole and that dream catcher with you next time you come, and make sure your mommy brings you up to my office so that you can show them to me and tell me all about them." He looked back down at Maddie and continued with an easy smile. "And I've got tons and tons of paper in there and we can do all the coloring you want. How does that sound?"

Maddie looked up at me expectantly, and I smiled softly at her, nodding to let her know Edward's suggestion sounded fine. She smiled hesitantly at first, but then her eyes twinkled and her smile grew. She looked back at Edward excitedly.

"You promise you'll draw with me? And you promise to be my friend foreva?"

Edward slowly knelt down to her level. He looked at her curiously for a couple of seconds, his eyes narrowed in confusion again, as if he was trying to figure out something himself. "I promise to draw with you as much as you want, and I promise to be your friend for as long as you want my friendship."

And like a flash of lightning, before I could stop her, Maddie threw her arms around Edward's shoulders, catching us both by surprise. I could see Edward's eyes widen in shock, but then slowly, carefully he put his strong arms around her gently, and quickly looked up at me, as if afraid he'd done something wrong.

And honestly, under normal circumstances, I wouldn't have been too happy about a man I'd just met holding my daughter. But…all I could do was stare at them, completely dumbfounded, because unlike Edward, I knew how unbelievable this really was. Maddie had been locked up within herself since we'd left Forks, not sure where she fit in now, not sure who to trust, and in one morning, she'd opened herself, and her heart it seemed, to none other than Edward Cullen.

What was going on here?

Maddie slowly pulled away from Edward, a huge, satisfied grin on her face. "Bye Edwood, see you soon!" she exclaimed, appeased now.

Edward chuckled lightly. "Bye Princess," he laughed. His face grew serious suddenly, and he looked back up at me.

"Are you taking the subway home?" he asked intently.

"Um, yes."

He seemed to debate something for a second before turning back to Maddie with a firm look.

"Just make sure you hold your mommy's hand tight on the train." He sounded genuinely concerned.

Maddie giggled. "That's just what mommy says!" she confirmed. Edward chuckled and stood up. He looked at me, his eyes unreadable, yet searching. He gave me one of those signature crooked grins that I was so used to seeing on the cover of magazines, but here, in person, I couldn't help but thinking that it seemed much more real, much more genuine than it had in the papers.

"Have a safe trip home." His voice was sincere. "And good luck with the sitter. I hope everything works out well for you."

The intensity in his smooth voice confused me, and all I could manage was a simple "thanks" before turning and walking away, feeling his eyes on me all the way to the subway station down the block.

What. The. Hell?

**A/N: Alright guys, hoped you enjoyed this second installment. Do me a big, personal favor and hit the button below and leave me a REVIEW please? Let me know what you think of this so far. Let me know who you think Bella's babydaddy is. What do you think was going on in Forks that made it so hard for Bella? Hell, speculate on the weather for all I care, just leave a review please!**

**Thank you!**

**REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. **


	3. Chapter 3 Strict Avoidance

**A/N: Hey there! The third installment in our new story. Hope you guys are enjoying it so far. I've gotten lots of speculation as to who Maddie's father is, and why Bella decided to leave Forks. You'll find out soon enough, don't worry. **

**You guys also seem to love Maddie. I'm glad. You can credit her little speech impediments to my daughter. I know I should correct her, but I just love listening to her speak that way. Anyway, in a few years she'll be talking about boys and I'll be missing her little speech problems.**

**Thanks to my lovely Beta, Danna0724. She's come up with the best nickname for our Edward in this story! I'll let you know in the next chapter, because you'll get it more then. But I LOVE IT!**

**All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just moving them out to the East Coast for a while.**

_I have been a selfish being all my life, in practice, though not in principle.__** – Mr. Darcy, Pride and Prejudice**_

**Ch. 3 – Strict Avoidance**

**EPOV**

I hadn't spoken to Bella in two weeks, not since that semi-conversation we'd had in the elevator the day I'd met her, the day she'd gone to meet the new babysitter for her daughter, little Maddie. Just as I'd planned, I'd stayed away from her after that day, avoiding the 22nd floor as much as possible, keeping myself busy in my office. But the fact was we worked in the same company and we were bound to have to interact, especially considering I was, technically, her boss.

So although I hadn't actually spoken to her these past two weeks, our paths had crossed. Rosalie had brought her into a couple of our big accounts - she appeared to be extremely happy with Bella's work – and we'd therefore had a couple of meetings together, planning and strategizing on how to deliver a superior product to the clients she'd be working with.

Since Rosalie was the Agency's Creative Director, Em, Jazz and I let her run most of those meetings with Bella; it was she whom Bella had to get the A-OK from before her work ever made it to any of our desks. Although I was the head of Traffic and Production, it was Rose who was in charge of the Creative Team; my job was to make sure that whatever ideas Rose and her team came up with made it to the light of day, so to speak. As head of Account Planning, Emmett's job was to make sure the client's views and needs were being well-represented by our agency, and as head of Media, Jasper's job was to organize the timing and scheduling of our ad campaign.

Em and Jasper had of course put their two cents in during these meetings, but I'd remained quiet; avoiding looking directly at Bella unless absolutely necessary; directing any comments or questions towards Rose. It wasn't that I didn't want to hear her voice. On the contrary, my eyes may have been elsewhere while she spoke but my ears and mind were always strangely attuned to every syllable that popped out of her mouth. But because it had been plainly obvious during our last encounter that Bella realized what had happened, or almost happened, with Lauren in the conference room, I was clearly not her favorite person in the office. In addition, every time I looked at her, the world suddenly spun on its axis, and I had the strangest feeling that I was falling. My heart rate would accelerate like a freakin' race horse, my pulse would inexplicably quicken, my mouth would go dry, my palms would get sweaty, and I'd feel strangely dizzy; like I was on some sort of weird drug or something.

And it wasn't that the feeling was entirely unpleasant. It definitely wasn't. But it was the most mind-fucking feeling I'd ever had in my life. I didn't know what to make of it. And I wasn't used to not knowing what to make of things. I could tell she avoided looking and talking to me just as much, if not more, than I did. I didn't want to make her uncomfortable, when she so obviously hated my guts. So I continued with the strict avoidance policy as much as possible.

But I'd see her. I'd see her in the mornings sometimes as she'd rush in quickly, looking straight ahead and not noticing anyone around her. She'd cross the lobby down to our elevator banks while I'd sit over by the windows, having a morning cup of coffee and reading the paper before heading upstairs myself. I'd chuckle and shake my head; the girl was so obviously not from the city. She paid no attention to her surroundings, focused solely on getting upstairs and starting her work day.

It was weird though. Sometimes it downright rattled my nerves to see how unaware she was. Anyone could've just come up to her and caught her by surprise. The thought would make me uneasy while I sat there watching her with a tight knot forming in my chest. She was all alone in the city, I'd more or less gathered, with no one to take care of her or little Maddie. That bothered me…

But sometimes I wondered if she really was as unaware as she seemed. A couple of times, while I'd watched her waiting for the elevator, I'd seen a puzzled look suddenly cross her face. And then slowly, she'd turned around and her eyes would start searching, as if looking for someone, or as if some sense told her she was being watched. I'd quickly hid behind my newspaper while she scanned the area, knowing how low she thought of me already and not wanting her to add 'crazy stalker guy' to her list of my wrongdoings.

My feet would itch to follow her into the elevator on those days. I wondered what it would be like to be trapped inside that small box again with her for a few short seconds, just long enough to get answers to all the questions I was dying to ask but was too chicken shit to; not even to myself.

Things appeared to have worked out with the babysitter. I'd gathered - after another damn round of teeth-pulling with Rosalie - that Bella had come into work much more relaxed the day after meeting the babysitter. For some reason, that knowledge had relaxed me too. Because if Bella was relaxed that meant Maddie was happy, and as weird as it was, that seemed to matter to me. Rosalie had watched me curiously while I'd let out a large sigh of relief at the news, and then she'd shaken her head and marched out of my office.

Sometimes, at the end of the workday, I'd sit downstairs in the lobby again and I'd catch a glimpse of Bella leaving for home, rushing out of the building even quicker than she'd rushed in. Anxious, I was sure, to get home to Maddie. A couple of times I'd almost followed her out, wondering if she'd accept a ride home from me. The idea of her having to ride in those crowded subway trains – with all sorts of strange, sweaty, suspicious characters - irritated me. But then I'd remember my policy of strict avoidance, and the fact that she'd probably just shoot me another one of her 'get the fuck away from me' glares, like she had in the hallway and in the elevator that day.

So yeah, we'd done a pretty good job of avoiding each other for the past couple of weeks. And here I sat now, in my large corner office, looking out of my floor-to-ceiling windows at the Manhattan skyline before me; the sun high in the sky and casting a brilliant glimmering glow off of the mirrored skyscrapers lining Park Avenue. As kick ass as the view from my office was, I couldn't seem to be able to see past the two chocolate brown orbs that had been blocking my view for the past two weeks.

The door to my office opened abruptly and Emmett burst in like a huge tornado, his loud gruff voice breaking me out of my brown-eye-induced trance.

"Hey bro, do you have the print samples for the EverSoft Cream account? Johnson's been calling me all morning asking for them, even though I told him the samples wouldn't be ready until tomorrow." He plopped himself down on my guest chair, spreading himself out comfortably. "But I've gotta get him off my back," he continued, clasping his hands together like he was about to pray, "so please tell me you've got them ready so I don't have to choke that pain-in-the-ass over the phone?"

I stared at him blankly for a few seconds, even though I'd heard him clearly. My mind just wasn't ready to let go of those hypnotic brown eyes yet. Emmett stared back at me, waiting for an answer. Once he realized he wasn't getting one any time soon, he reached out with his huge arm and snapped his fingers twice in front of my face.

"Hey! Hello? Earth to Edward, did you hear what I said?"

I blinked a couple of times and shook my head quickly, forcing my mind to focus on Emmett. "Yes Emmett, I heard. And yes, the samples are ready. I'll send them over to Johnson myself."

"Alriiight!" Emmett smiled. "Good!" He leaned back happily; satisfied. He watched me again for a few seconds, a bemused look on his face.

"Hey, Ed man, you okay? You've seemed a bit out of it lately. Something on your mind?" he asked with some concern.

I furrowed my brows and shook my head. Emmett and I had always had a good relationship, and I usually had no problem opening up to him about the women I met, or anyone who'd caught my eye. He'd usually shake his head at me and laugh, calling me a lucky bastard or something, even though we both knew he no longer had any inclination to play the field. He and Rosalie were crazy in love with each other, emphasis on the crazy part.

But that wasn't what this was. I hadn't _really_ met anyone recently, at least not in the way I was used to meeting women. And this thing I was feeling, this pull – I had no other way to describe it - was too confusing to put into words. Too complicated. Too wrong and impossible the direction in which I felt myself being pulled. A part of me kept hoping that maybe if I ignored it enough, if I didn't voice my confusing feelings out loud, eventually they'd go away. And anyway, even if I'd wanted to, I couldn't have voiced my feelings out loud. Because I had no fucking idea _what_ was going on with me. I took in a deep breath and let it out before answering my brother.

"I'm just tired I guess," I sort of lied.

Emmett chuckled, but he didn't look entirely convinced by my answer. "Yeah, I guess I'd be tired too if I lived your party hardy life." I turned to give him a short chuckle before turning my attention back to the window.

"So who's this week's lucky lady?" he continued in a lower voice, but it seemed like there was something else he wanted to ask instead. "I haven't been keeping up with my Page Six gossip. What have you been up to lately?" I pressed my lips together and rolled my eyes, keeping them on the windows.

"Em, you know better than to believe the shit in there," I chided.

He laughed heartily. "Well, it's the only way to keep up with you lately man. These past few months your life's been a whirlwind of activity, girls coming and going like you're a damn revolving door. Then you go off to Europe with barely a word to any one of us – which by the way – freaked out mom and dad no end. Jasper and I had a hell of a time reshuffling your meetings and accounts at the last minute like that," he finished in a more accusatory tone.

Which I fully deserved. I'd known this was coming, and I'd been waiting for it. The "business trip" I'd taken late last month had been anything but. I'd left for London suddenly, with the excuse of researching potential overseas clients. But the truth was that for the past few months, something just hadn't been right. I'd started feeling like…I didn't even know. Like something was missing. Like there was something I was supposed to be doing, or something I was supposed to be looking for. And even though I was constantly surrounded by beautiful women, even though I had enough money to buy whatever I wanted, even though I was lucky enough to have a great family, it just wasn't enough.

So Emmett was right; the past few months I'd started partying harder than usual. But strangely enough, all the partying and women just made the void grow even more. So I'd added long days and evenings of work to the mix. I'd stay at the office until nine or ten at night, and then head off to a club or something until the early hours of the morning. But none of it worked. Instead, I could feel the void getting bigger, as if there were some sort of hole festering inside of me, eating away at me. Last month it had finally gotten so unbearable that I'd just needed to get away. I'd booked a flight to London with little warning to my family, and I'd been gone for three weeks. And although the time away had helped to calm me down – at least the hole didn't feel like it was festering anymore – I'd still come back with the void; with the feeling that something was missing. Looking back, that's probably why I'd been so ready to lock myself in a conference room with Lauren that day, to see if maybe the thrill of possibly getting caught would help fill the void. It hadn't worked of course. And now every time I recalled that incident I felt extremely disgusted with myself. And I'd also managed to disgust _her _in the process, not that I knew why I even cared about that.

Yet, strangely enough, that day had also been the first time in months that I hadn't felt the void, but not because of the conference room incident. It was afterwards that the void seemed to be healing; to be filling up. It was once I'd caught sight of the two brown-haired beauties that had been waiting outside, one sweet and innocent, the other intense and mysterious. The void had been replaced with hunger now, but a different hunger from that which I was used to feeling. It was a hunger for knowledge of all things related to Bella Swan. But Bella Swan was forbidden fruit; so the hunger would have to continue until I starved it out.

And she hated my damn guts anyway.

I finally turned back to my brother. "Emmett, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have just up and left like that. It was really irresponsible of me."

Emmett pursed his lips together before breaking out into a grin again. My big brother. His huge size and muscles were enough to scare the shit out of Schwarzenegger, but he could never stay upset at any one of us for longer than two minutes. "Pfft! Don't worry about it!" he reassured me. "Rosie was the one that was pissed off the most." I rolled my eyes again. Of course, she'd be the one to be pissed off. "_You_ were supposed to handle the Seattle trip. She wasn't too thrilled about having to be the one to fly up there to interview the potential hires the headhunters had lined up for us. You're really damn lucky she found Bella Swan out there or else she would've really had your head if the trip had been for nothing."

At the mention of Bella's name my heart rate picked up and my eyes widened.

"So Rose seems to be happy with her new hire so far huh?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

Emmett snorted. "Happy? You kidding me? She's proud as piss at her find! You know how hard my Rosie is to please. Well, _I_ know how hard she is to please," he added with a snicker – I looked away from him and rolled my eyes again at his sick innuendo, but then turned back to him. I didn't want to discourage the turn our conversation had now taken - "but Bella Swan's doing some great work. Rosie's already put her on the Wheat-a-Bits and EverSoft accounts, and you know those are her pride and joy. She's only been here about a month, but Rosie's confident that she can handle the work. And I trust Rosie. If she thinks Bella can handle it, then that's enough for me."

I nodded my head quickly. "Yeah, I'm sure she can handle it," I agreed emphatically.

Emmett watched me curiously. "Really? I was kind of under the impression you had some reservations regarding Bella. I've noticed you don't really interact with her too much, especially during the couple of meetings Rosie's included her in."

I stared straight ahead, trying to figure out what to say to ward off Emmett's suspicious stare. "Uh, no. I've been extremely impressed with her and her work. She just seems like the quiet type and, I don't really know…"

Emmett cut me off before I could figure out how to finish. "Well, yeah, she does sort of stick to herself. She's divorced and she's got a kid it seems, came out to the city to start fresh or something I guess. But as quiet as she is, she knows when to speak up and when to stand her ground, which is one of the reasons she's been able to impress Rosie. You know Rosie has no respect for ass-kissers or spineless morons."

I chuckled; knowing very well the only way to earn Rosalie's respect was to stand up to her. "Rosie's told me of a couple of instances already when Bella's refused to change her designs because of some criticism from Lauren or James."

The thought that someone with basic mediocre talent like Lauren, or that spineless James - the other Graphic Artist working in Rosalie's department - would have the nerve to criticize Bella's work totally pissed me off. Just because I didn't look directly at _her_ during our meetings didn't mean I hadn't seen her work. There was no denying she was extremely talented. Her designs were bold, fresh and she seemed to have an almost instinctive grasp on what the clients were looking for. It was no wonder she'd been able to impress Rosalie so thoroughly in such a short time.

Yet those other two morons had had the fucking balls to criticize her? I had to fight an almost overwhelming urge to go down there and put 'em both on the unemployment line right then.

"Bella's even held her ground with Rosie a couple of times!" Emmett continued, laughing, "When she didn't agree with Rosie's modifications to her work. And the shit is the girl was right! The Wheat-a-Bits guys loved Bella's original designs. I thought Rosie would've killed the girl for disagreeing with her, but she's absolutely thrilled with her find. You know she's totally taking credit for that hiring," he chuckled. "Although you know my Rosie, she'll never admit to being that impressed."

Imagining Bella standing up to Rosalie and being right brought a huge smile to my face, and I couldn't help but chuckle. Rose wasn't used to being wrong. Yet she was professional enough to not let it get to her as long as the client was happy.

"Seems kind of young to be divorced, any idea what happened there?" I ventured, hoping my extreme curiosity wasn't too obvious.

His face registered surprise at my switch to more personal questions. But then he just shrugged and shook his head. "No idea, but I did hear from Rosie that-"

Before Emmett could continue, the door to my office opened up once again and in walked my sister Alice, as giddy and jumpy as ever.

"There you two are!" she exclaimed. "I was hoping I'd find you both in here." She walked over to each one of us and planted a quick kiss on our cheeks before flinging herself onto the small black leather couch I had by the window. "You two haven't forgotten what today is?" she whispered conspiratorially.

"Wednesday?" Emmett and I both responded at the same time.

Alice pursed her lips angrily and glared at us. "No you idiots! It's August 30th!" We continued to stare at her blankly. "Jasper's birthday!" she announced, exasperated. She glanced at the door before continuing in a low voice. "You guys are coming tonight right?" Her eyes were pleading.

I laughed at my tiny sister, watching as she sat there, completely inflamed. Her short spiky hair stuck up all over the place, even worse than mine. "Alice, you do this every year. Every year you remind us that it's Jasper's birthday, and every year you have a party for him. And have we ever not shown up?" I asked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

She stuck her tongue out at me, watching me through narrowed eyes. "Well, I just wanted to make sure." She looked directly at me before continuing. "It's very important that you come this year."

"And why is that?" I questioned.

Alice seemed to scramble for an answer. "Well, it's just that…I've made some changes to the loft I'd like you all to see," she finished.

"So what?" Emmett asked. "We've all seen your loft before. How different can it look?" Alice turned to look at him now, narrowing her eyes even further until they were just two small slits.

"It just does. Okay?" she hissed. She turned back to me. "But you are coming Edward, right?" she repeated.

For the past three years that Alice and Jasper had been together, she'd hold a not-so-surprising surprise party for him on his birthday. And I'd gone every single year without complaint. Except this year I honestly didn't feel up for it. The thought of standing there, alone, surrounded by dozens of both familiar and not so familiar people didn't exactly appeal to me tonight.

"Alice, I don't know." I ran my fingers through my hair and leaned back in my chair. Alice's face fell in disappointment.

"Edward, please. Come on! You've got to come this year," she pleaded again.

I sighed. "Alice, you know I'm usually the first one up for a party, but seriously, I just don't think I can tonight. I'm really tired." I tried the same excuse I'd used with Emmett just a short while ago.

Alice's usually soft face hardened. "Yeah, I guess I'd be tired too if I was out screwing around with skanks like Tanya until the wee hours of the morning!" she spat.

I laughed at her. "I keep telling you all, don't believe everything you read on Page Six. They're full of shit."

"There was a picture Edward," she exclaimed dryly.

I laughed again. "Alice, that doesn't mean anything. That picture was probably months old. I haven't seen Tanya in weeks," I confirmed. Alice had always hated my on again, off again girlfriend Tanya.

"Isn't that slander or libel or something then Edward, if they print a picture with a caption saying they just spotted you with her last night if it isn't true?" She arched an eyebrow, not entirely convinced.

"It's libel, actually," I clarified, "_if_ the person being libeled has the time or the patience to do anything about it." I shrugged my shoulders. "But I don't care what they want to say or print, and they all know that. Who the hell cares if they want to say I spent the night with Tanya yesterday? Doesn't bother me, and I'm sure as hell it doesn't bother Tanya," I added, winking at her.

Alice glared at me, pursing her lips in disapproval. "Well you _should_ care big brother. One of these days they're going to say something you won't like in those papers, and then you'll be royally fucked," she finished, surprising both Emmett and me with her cursing. It wasn't very Alice-like. She only let the f-bomb fly if she was extremely annoyed, as when Tanya was involved.

"Yeah well, when that day comes, I'll sue them then."

"By then it may be too late to sue them," Alice added in a warning tone, as if she could already see the future. She'd always had an uncanny way of predicting things. But she was starting to piss me off now.

"Alright look, I'll come over tonight if you get off my back about the Page Six crap." Alice bounced up and down on her seat and clapped her hands happily.

"Yay! Now remember, it starts at 8:00. Try to be on time please!" she whined.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." I waved her off. "Now if you two can please leave my office. I've got real work to get to."

"Fine!" Alice huffed, feigning indignation. "I'll just go downstairs and pop in on Rosalie quickly before I go see Jasper," she muttered, standing up.

Emmett turned around to address her before walking out of my office, "I think she's in a meeting with Bella right now. By the way," he continued, "did you invite B-"

"Emmett!" Alice screamed, cutting him off before he was able to finish what he was about to say. "Um, I think I hear your phone ringing in your office! You'd better hurry, it might be someone important!" she yelled, pushing him out the door with her little, unnaturally strong body.

I left work early that afternoon, after completing what was becoming my daily P.M. routine - hiding behind my newspaper in a quiet corner in the lobby and watching Bella Swan head home, looking as intriguingly distracted as ever. There was no denying she was a beauty – her long brown hair swayed softly back and forth as she quickly scurried out, her forehead creased in concentration as she focused on the quickest path out of the building. But what made her beauty stand out was the unassuming way in which she carried it; there were no false airs, no sexy walk or revealing clothes. If she wore any makeup it was minimal, at least that's what I'd gathered from the first day we'd spoken and the few times I'd let myself quickly steal a glance in her direction. She was completely natural and refreshing, yet she put any other woman standing within one hundred feet of her to shame. And based on the looks I'd seen many of the suited up monkeys in the building giving her as she'd pass them by – completely oblivious to the heads turning in her wake – I wasn't the only man who thought so. And once again I found she brought out another urge in me – the urge to go up to every man she passed and beat the living shit out of them as they eyed her walking by.

I snorted quietly to myself as I stood behind my newspaper. If this strange hunger didn't die down, and soon, Bella Swan was going to be the death of me.

I opened the door to my Central Park West apartment and made my way right into my bedroom, dropping my messenger bag on my unmade bed and heading straight to the bathroom. I needed a shower. A very cold one. It was a hot and sticky summer evening, and I'd started sweating just from the walk from the garage to my building. My shirt clung to my chest uncomfortably and I began to dread having to head out into this heat again tonight. I regretted having promised Alice that I'd show up to her little party. I would've much preferred to stay in tonight, alone with a couple of beers and my daydreams about a certain pretty brunette. I laughed to myself, realizing how weird that sounded. A few weeks ago the thought of staying in, alone, after work would've never sounded appealing. Yet for the past couple of weeks that's basically what my routine had become. Going to work and coming home, going for a jog over at the park for a couple of hours, sitting by the lake for a while, listening to my Ipod and thinking, or coming home, taking a bath and then sitting by the TV and thinking. Always thinking. And always about the same thing, the same person…

Sometimes I'd take the elevator down a few floors and hang out with Emmett and Rosalie – they lived in the same building - just to break up the monotony. But those visits were always quick. Rosalie usually got pissed off if Em and I played video games for too long and started ignoring her. And if we let her play, she'd beat the shit out of us and then she and Emmett would end up in a shouting match. Inevitably that would lead to both of them throwing down their controllers and Emmett grabbing Rose and throwing her down on the couch under him. It was some weird, sick sort of foreplay for them. Then, as usual, I'd let myself out before there make-up slash make-out session grew even more heated, completely grossing me out. Those two had no self-control.

After my shower, dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, I decided to lounge about for a while before getting ready for Alice and Jasper's party. I turned on the TV in my bedroom and lay across my bed, hoping the current episode of 'Friends' would distract me enough to get my mind off of those soft brown eyes that haunted me everywhere. Yeah, fat chance.

My eyes scanned the room and came across the telephone answering machine sitting on my nightstand; the red message light blinking annoyingly on and off. I pressed the play button and listened to the various messages, a mix between annoying telemarketers, my mother reminding me she'd barely seen me since my return from London, Emmett asking if I wanted a ride with them to Alice's (no thanks I thought, the last thing I needed was to watch those two groping each other and giving each other sex eyes all the way to Brooklyn), and then, the last message, from Tanya.

"_Edward dahling, I haven't seen you or heard from you in so long. Where are you hiding yourself? Give me a call so we can…get together?_ – she giggled mischeviously – "_I miss you dahling. Call me. Soon."_ Click.

Ah, Tanya. Always ready. Always up for anything. The last person I wanted or needed to see right now. Tanya had a hard time understanding what 'we're broken up' meant. She still called me at least a couple of times a week, even if it was usually my answering machine she spoke to. When I'd been partying it up hard a few months ago, she'd made sure she showed up wherever I went, always trying to come home with me once I got wasted enough to leave wherever we were. And even though I'd made it clear that I didn't want to be with her any more, she continued to act like she was my girlfriend whenever we were out in the same place, glaring at any other girl that dared to come my way. Most of the time, I just laughed it off. I couldn't care less if she managed to scare away one girl or another, there were always more ready to brave her wrath. None of them really mattered to me anyway, one way or another. And as long as we were _all_ clear on that, there was no problem.

So my initial reaction to her message was to press the delete button and ignore it, the way I'd been doing for the past few weeks, since I'd returned from London. She'd been pissed as all hell that I hadn't invited her on my trip, and the Page Six columns had announced that since I was off in London doing my thing there, Tanya Denali, famous heiress to the Denali chain of high-class hotels, had decided to pay her "boyfriend" back by screwing around with a different man every night. Whether the story was true or not really didn't make a difference to me, although I suspected she'd planted the story herself. It wouldn't be the first time she'd planted her own name as part of a scandalous headline. Tanya was a sneaky one. And she loved the spotlight. And either way, I didn't really care.

I turned back to the TV, watching Phoebe try to explain to the rest of the gang why Rachel was Ross' lobster. And somehow, of course, that ridiculous conversation between fictional characters on TV got me thinking about Bella. Damn.

Everything nowadays got me thinking about her. I ran my hand through my hair, frustrated. It had been two weeks since I'd first laid eyes on her. How long was it going to take for this bizarre fascination to finally wear itself out? What the hell did I have to do to finally get her off my mind?

The answer seemed so clear all of a sudden that I wondered why I hadn't thought of it before. I needed a distraction. I needed something, or rather someone, to get my mind off of Bella Swan. And it was suddenly so clear who that someone should be, who was always ready and willing to help distract me.

Tanya.

I picked up the phone and dialed her number quickly, before some other part of me, the part that deep inside I suspected was probably the only rational part of me right now, convinced me not to. Tanya picked up on the second ring.

"Edward dahling?" she breathed seductively.

"Tanya. How are you?" I answered, shaking my head slowly and laughing at myself; the realization of what I was actually doing hitting me. This fucking screamed mistake.

"Lonely dahling. I've been missing you. Why haven't you called me?" she asked, letting her slight accent show through even more, like she did whenever she was trying to be cute.

"I've been busy. And I've had…a lot on my mind lately." It was true.

"Edward, you work too hard. You know what they say, 'All work and no play makes Eddie a dull boy.'" She giggled at her joke. I rolled my eyes and smirked.

"What are you doing tonight Edward? Why don't you come get me? We can go out and have fun." I didn't answer, and after a few seconds, she added in a low, throaty voice. "Or I could come over to you and we can just…stay in…"

"Actually, I'm going over to Alice's in a little while. She's having a birthday party for Jasper."

"Oh", was all Tanya responded, but I could picture her sneering on the other end. Alice and Tanya had never quite hit it off. As a matter of fact, no one in my family had ever really been fond of Tanya.

I was about to leave it at that, but then I remembered the purpose of my phone call, to distract myself. I needed to get my mind off of Bella, and I couldn't stand the thought of spending another night dreaming about a girl I'd barely even spoken to, a girl who obviously disliked me anyway. The words popped out of my mouth before I'd gotten a chance to really think them through.

"Do you wanna come with me? To Alice and Jasper's?" I clarified.

"I'd love to _come_ with you anywhere dahling, you know that," Tanya breathed into the phone suggestively.

I ignored her little hint and continued. "I'll pick you up at 8:00 then?"

She laughed. "That sounds fine. I'll be waiting," she sang.

I pressed the end button on the phone, but my hand and the phone remained in the air, as I finally questioned the sanity of what I'd just done. I didn't want to lead Tanya on, but the fact was all I'd done was ask her to my sister's party. There was no reason for her to expect anything beyond that.

Except I knew Tanya. She would've expected something if I'd just invited her to church. I snorted, pinching the bridge of my nose and wondering what kind of shit I'd just gotten myself into. Well, one thing was for sure. I'd be thoroughly distracted tonight.

I pulled up in my black Audi in front of Tanya's Tribeca loft at exactly 8:00 pm. I got out and walked over to ring her doorbell and let her know I was here. I knew better than to try to go upstairs.

"Edward?" Tanya asked over the speaker.

"Yes Tanya. Are you ready?"

"I'll be down in a minute," she confirmed.

I went back to my car to wait. After a few minutes, I saw her coming out of her building wearing a short, slinky, black dress that clung to her tightly. I got up to open the car door for her.

"Edward, still so punctual, aren't you?" she said, giving me a soft, lingering kiss on the cheek.

"Actually, Alice wanted me there at eight, so we're running late already," I answered while holding the door open for her.

"Oh that's too bad," she began, and then paused before climbing in the car. She turned to look me in the eyes. "I was going to ask you if you wanted to come upstairs and…have a drink before we were on our way."

"I'm driving Tanya," I responded, holding her gaze.

"We could always take a cab…afterwards," she suggested in a low voice.

"We're late Tanya. We'd better go," I answered, holding the door. She stared at me for a few seconds before smiling and turning around to get in the car.

Alice and Jasper's Loft was located right on the Brooklyn side of the Hudson River, in an old converted warehouse. Just 10 years ago, the entire area where Alice and Jasper lived had been no better than a war zone, with burned down and abandoned buildings littering the neighborhood, drug dealers doing business on the corners, and all sorts of illegal activities scattered around. Eventually, someone had finally figured out the potential the area held, located right on the river, with an amazing view of the Manhattan skyline and a quick and easy commute into the city. Today, the area was teaming with converted warehouses that now housed high priced lofts, boutiques scattered around instead of drug dens, and quaint little cafes occupied the spaces where the burned down buildings used to be. Once Jasper and Alice had decided to buy a place together, Alice had initially started looking in Manhattan, close to where Emmett and I were. There was no way she was going into Long Island, she said, where our parents lived. But then one day, she'd gone to visit a friend in Brooklyn that she'd met while on tour in Paris, and had immediately fallen in love with the area, DUMBO, which stands for Down Under the Manhattan & Brooklyn Overpass. It was trendy and up and coming, just like her, she'd professed. Jasper, who didn't care where he lived as long as he was with her, had agreed easily, and within a couple of months they'd found the loft they lived in now. Coincidently enough, it was within that same time period that she'd found the perfect space for her dance studio, in an old abandoned building just a few blocks from her loft. As with everything with my sister, it was as if it had been meant to be.

As Tanya and I walked into Alice's building, Tanya looked around with disdain.

"How can your sister live here? The area is so bohemian, so classless!" she scoffed.

I chuckled, knowing full well how spoiled Tanya was. As far as she was concerned, New York City consisted only of one borough, Manhattan, and even that was confined to no higher than Central Park.

"I think it's rather nice actually," I disagreed. "I could see myself waking up to that view every morning," I said, signaling to the Manhattan skyline just across the river.

"Ugh!" Tanya continued, unconvinced. "You would live here among all these barbarians?"

I nodded.

"I don't believe you" she challenged. We were riding up the elevator now. She put one hand firmly on my shoulder, and shot me a challenging look, "Edward Cullen, face it, you and I are the same. Rich, spoiled and greedy. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that."

I glared at her but didn't answer, wanting to disagree, but not sure if I actually could. The elevator opened and we stepped out quickly.

As we walked over to Alice's loft, I could hear the music playing inside, as well as the sounds of people laughing. I was suddenly glad I'd invited Tanya after all, it would at least give me an excuse to leave the party early if I got tired of talking to all the people Alice and Jasper had probably invited. For a second, before Jasper pulled the door open, I found myself wondering who exactly, besides the regulars, had been invited this year.

Jasper gave me an easy smile as he opened the door, looking over at Tanya and unable to hide the surprise in his face at seeing her with me. Always the Southern gentleman though, he quickly recovered himself and greeted Tanya cordially.

"Tanya. How are you? Please come in."

"Jasper dahling. It's so good to see you again," she claimed while giving him an 'air' kiss.

Jasper smiled at her hospitably, before turning back to me.

"Edward, Alice has been waiting for you." He gave me a bemused smile before glancing between Tanya and me quickly. "You'd better go find her and let her know you're here before she sends out a search party for you." I rolled my eyes and scanned the large living room for my sister. I spotted Emmett and Rosalie standing off to the side with our father and some other acquaintances. My dad's eyes met mine and he smiled, nodding his head in greeting. However, his smile quickly fell as soon as he spotted Tanya next to me. For a split second I saw the disappointment in his eyes, but he gave her a gentlemanly nod before turning back to Rosalie. Emmett had a beer in his hand and was laughing loudly, and I could tell it wasn't his first beer of the night. Rosalie's hands were empty, and I guessed she'd be doing the driving tonight. On the other side were a few other people we knew, friends Jasper and I had gone to school with, as well as some other people I wasn't familiar with. I spotted some people from work around the room too, some standing around talking to each other pleasantly, as well as some taking advantage of the open bar Alice had booked for the night. One of the guys was James Smyth, a Graphic Artist in Rosalie's department. I watched him ordering a drink from the bar, wondering what he was doing here. The guy had always rubbed me the wrong way. But my thoughts were quickly interrupted as a small, yet strong hand grabbed my arm from behind, squeezing it so tightly that if I hadn't known it was Alice's way of grabbing me when she was extremely mad at me, I would've turned around swinging.

"Ow! Shit Alice. What the fuck?" I blurted.

I looked at my unnaturally strong, tiny sister. She glared at me through narrowed eyes, her lips drawn in a tight line; her whole frame exuded extreme irritation. She took a long, deep breath before speaking, as if to reign in her fury.

"Edward. You're late!" she accused.

"Yeah, I had to stop by and pick up Tanya. Damn! Shit! I think you left a mark," I groaned, rubbing my arm.

Alice ignored my complaints and turned her death rays on Tanya. "Tanya," she spoke through pursed lips, "I wasn't expecting to see you tonight," she said, glaring between the both of us.

"Alice, dahling!" Tanya began. She made a move to approach Alice and give her one of her 'air' kisses, but upon closer inspection of Alice's scowl, she appeared to think better of it, and remained frozen to her spot. "I simply love your little loft! It's so…chic!" she offered. "And the neighborhood is simply adorable, so…different."

Alice continued glaring at her before answering. "Really? I would've expected you to hate it. To find it barbaric actually. After all, not everyone running around here is as rich and spoiled as you are."

Tanya's eyes widened in shock at my sister's accusation, she looked over at me with eyes full of blame, as if I'd somehow told Alice exactly what Tanya had said downstairs and in the elevator. She had no way of knowing that Alice had always had a weird and uncanny knack for knowing things, as if she'd seen it happen or something. It was strange, but our family was used to strange from Alice.

My lips twitched from the effort it took not to burst out laughing.

"I wish you would've told me you were bringing a date tonight Edward," Alice hissed quietly.

I smiled teasingly at my sister. "I wasn't aware I needed your permission." I'd expected her to smirk at me or stick her tongue out at me, like she usually did when I teased her, but her face remained a stoic, angry mask. I was momentarily confused by her extreme irritation. I mean, I knew she wasn't very fond of Tanya, but what the hell.

Alice took another deep breath before addressing me again. "I've got to go mingle. I'll catch up with you later." Her tone made it sound like a warning. She turned to walk away but then paused and turned back to us again, forcing a smile as she addressed Tanya. "Tanya, why don't you go get yourself a drink at the bar?" she suggested, her voice strangely sweet now. "And Edward, why don't you go look for mom? She's been waiting for you, says she's barely seen you since you got back." She smiled at me sweetly, putting me immediately on alert. "I think she's over by the bedroom balcony," she offered, her hands clasped behind her back while she bounced on her toes gracefully. I looked at her questioningly before nodding. She walked away giggling.

I turned to Tanya. "Tanya, I'm going to go find my mother. She's probably not too happy with me since I haven't seen her much lately," I warned her, knowing it was best if I spoke to my mother alone first before she saw me with Tanya. Even though Esme Cullen was no where near as direct as Alice was, I wanted to share a few pleasant moments with her before her eyes clouded with the same disappointment my father's had when he'd spotted me with Tanya.

Tanya smiled agreeably. "Would you like me to get you a drink?"

"No thanks. I'm fine. I'll be back in a few minutes." I added, hoping she'd get the hint and not come looking for me.

As I made my way to the bedroom, I wondered how I was going to get myself out of the situation I'd created with Tanya tonight. It'd been obvious on the ride over here and by the way she kept acting and talking that she expected the night to last way beyond this party. And a few months ago, she may have been right. But I sick and tired of playing these games with her; with anybody for that matter. Even though I'd only invited her to my sister's party, I knew what Tanya was like, and I knew what she'd make of it. I'd been an asshole to call her in the first place, and now I was going to have to make it clear to her that this wasn't what I wanted. I sighed, entering Alice's bedroom, knowing Tanya was gonna give me a hard time when I dropped her off tonight.

I froze momentarily, stopping dead in my tracks as I looked over at the balcony.

I would've recognized her from miles away; would've known it was her with my eyes closed. Her intoxicating and unique scent floated through the late evening breeze and made its way to my nostrils, and my eyes closed momentarily as I drank in the heavenly scent. She had her back to me, standing by the balcony railing looking over at the city skyline just across the river. Her hair cascaded softly down her back, waving lightly in the summer breeze, and the edges of her skirt billowed gently back and forth.

Bella Swan.

My heart stopped for three seconds, before picking up like a race horse. I felt my pulse quickening.

Bella Swan? What the hell was she doing here?

**A/N: So our sweet Alice is up to no good again, as my friend Danna puts it. And Edward is beginning to question his man-whore ways. Hmmm. **

**And how much are we hating Tanya? Let me know. I warn you, she'll get even more hateable throughout the story. **

**Just to let you know, I'm going to try to stick to the EPOV, BPOV alternating in this story, but sometimes, some of my characters have more to say than at other times. Which is the case for the next chapter! EPOV isn't over! He'll be back for the next chapter again, and then we'll go back to BPOV**

**Leave me reviews if you guys want the next chapter quickly. I'm holding it hostage unless every single one of you reviews. Ha, ha.**

**Seriously though, reviews please. I'd love to know what you guys are thinking about this story. The more reviews I get, the quicker I update.**

**And can anyone guess what nickname Danna's come up with for Edward? It's one of those '_ward' names. Take a guess!**

.


	4. Chapter 4 Stalker

**A/N: Alright, so I received a few really cool suggestions for our little '_ward'. Some of my favorites were Whoreward, Cluelessward, Slutward. **

**RingTheBella came up with a really cool one that I looove: Adward! (Get it, 'cause he works in advertising?) For this chapter though, my Beta girl Danna0724 takes the cake. You'll see what it is at the end of the chappy. It'll make more sense that way. But I'm really liking Adward…**

**Anyway, thanks go to my Beta Danna0724, for checking this little doozy. **

**I know some of you are waiting for the next chappy to IWBAIINE, I promise to have it posted by Wednesday, so keep an eye open for it.**

**All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I've just moved them out to the East Coast for a bit.**

'_Cause it's a bittersweet symphony this life. Trying to make ends meet, you're a slave to the money then you die. I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down. You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet, yeah. No change, I can't change, I can't change, I can't change. But I'm here in my mold. I am here in my mold. And I'm a million different people from one day to the next. I can't change my mold, no, no, no, no, no. __**–**_** Bittersweet Symphony, The Verve.**

**Chapter 4 – Stalker**

**EPOV **

Like a vision dreamt up subconsciously, without my having even been aware that _this_ was what I wanted or what I _needed_, Bella Swan was standing in the middle of Alice and Jasper's balcony.

What in the hell?

What was _she_ doing here?

Without conscious thought, my legs moved in her direction. In the back of my mind - as I watched her slender form standing there, completely relaxed while she gazed at the sun setting over the tall, sparkling skyscrapers - I knew my strict avoidance policy was out the window. Because city skyline or not, setting sun or not, I'd never seen such a beautiful sight in my life.

She didn't hear me approaching as I stepped into the balcony. Always so unaware of her surroundings.

"Beautiful view," I murmured. I wasn't referring to the skyline, but she didn't need to know that.

She jumped, spilling red wine from the glass she'd been holding. Her eyes grew wide when she saw me. We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity until she shook her head quickly and looked down at the balcony floor, at the spilled wine.

"Damn, I made a mess!" she complained.

"No. Don't worry about it." I turned and scanned Alice's bedroom. Seeing a set of towels on her dresser, I crossed the room to pick one up. I walked back to the balcony quickly and knelt down to dry the floor.

"Here, let me do that," Bella insisted, kneeling down across from me. "It's my mess."

"I've got it," I assured her, and quickly dried up the spill. I looked up to where she knelt beside me, and my eyes went straight to hers. I grinned at her like a helpless fool. After what seemed like some sort of debate, she offered me a hesitant smile in return.

Unlike her makeup-less days at the office, she wore red lipstick this evening.

Jesus, Lord Almighty.

Red.

It took all the will power I had to force myself to look away from those ruby reds and keep my eyes on hers.

"Thanks," she breathed, the hesitant smile still in place.

"For what?" I asked, confused. Had I complimented her choice of lip color out loud?

"For cleaning up the wine, Alice would've killed me." Her smile relaxed.

"Oh," I shook my head, feeling like an idiot. "Don't worry about it. I'm sure she wouldn't even have noticed," I lied. That little OCD Pixie noticed when one of her vases was two millimeters off center.

We remained there quietly, both of us still kneeling on one leg. Just behind Bella, the setting sun made its way past the tall buildings and down into the river, casting an orange and pink haze across the sky and illuminating the river and everything around it in a glowing, celestial light. As Bella knelt across from me, the sun's rays bounced off of her hair, making it seem like a bright and glorious halo encircled her entire frame. She looked absolutely breathtaking. I had to repress a gasp.

After a few seconds, I realized I needed to say something before she added 'gawking weirdo' to her list of my wrongdoings.

I cleared my throat. "How are you Bella?" I managed to squeak out.

"I'm fine, thanks," she answered in a low voice. Awkward silence. "And you?"

I smiled. "Pretty good." _And you and your ruby red lips can be thanked for that._

I suddenly realized we were both still kneeling on the floor. "Here, let me help you," I offered, putting a hand out to help her up. She stared at my hand for a split second before taking it. Fireworks exploded inside of me when her small hand touched mine, sending a jolt of heat throughout my body and momentarily shocking me. Wide eyed, I looked at Bella and noticed that her chocolate brown eyes had grown just as wide, and her cheeks turned a tempting shade of red, almost matching her ruby red lips, and infinitely more impressive than the color created by the setting sun surrounding us.

Neither of us said anything though as we stood and, begrudgingly, I let go of her hand. I continued to gaze at her though, unable to make myself look away.

I finally found my voice again. "I'm surprised to see you here. I didn't know Jasper invited you."

Her blush grew and she turned away from me, looking across the river again. "Actually, Alice invited me."

"Alice?" I asked, confused. "You know my sister, Alice?"

She turned back to me, chewing on the inside of her lip. I suppressed a groan, forcing myself to look away from her lips again. "Yes. I mean, well, I sort of met her through Rosalie, when she came to visit her at the office, and we kind of hit it off I guess."

"Oh." I was still a bit confused. "Alice never mentioned she knew you, or that you'd be here tonight," I said, thinking aloud.

Bella watched me, her forehead creasing for some reason, and then turned back to the view of the city. We were quiet again for a few seconds, and I wondered for about the thousandth time since I'd met her a couple of weeks ago, what she was thinking. When it became apparent she wasn't going to speak again, I broke the silence.

"How's Maddie?" I'd been wondering how her little girl was doing for days, remembering her small, warm arms around my neck as she asked me to be her eternal friend.

Bella's face brightened. She turned to face me, and this time, a wide smile graced her beautiful face. "She's very well, thank you," she responded in a lighter tone. "That list you suggested, it was a godsend. We found a wonderful babysitter, and only a few blocks from where we live. Maddie hasn't been this happy in months. Every morning she wakes up asking if she's going to Sue's house. The past couple of weekends" – she chuckled - "she's actually been disappointed when I tell her it's not a 'Sue's house' day." She frowned but the smile still played on her lips, obviously anything but offended by Maddie's fondness for her new sitter. "She's over there now," she added. "Sue's grown really fond of Maddie in the past couple of weeks too."

I chuckled. "It's not hard to see why."

Bella smiled. "Alice kept insisting that I come tonight. Eventually I relented and asked Sue to watch Maddie. It's kind of strange really. I haven't been out without her in so long…" She trailed off.

Listening to Bella, I suddenly realized that this was the longest conversation she and I had ever had. I laughed at myself internally. This was so freakin' ridiculous. How could someone with who I'd barely shared ten words with before have such an intense effect on me?

"I'm really glad to hear Maddie's doing well. She's a beautiful little girl," I said sincerely.

Bella's face brightened even more. "Thanks," she beamed.

"You think you'll be bringing her around the office soon?" I was honestly hoping she would. "She owes me a serious drawing session. I'm talking crayons, markers, finger paints, the works!"

Bella laughed heartily, throwing her head back and almost making me melt where I stood. If watching her smile widely was mesmerizing, hearing her laugh was like listening to the choirs of heaven singing.

Jesus, this woman was definitely going to be the death of me.

"Yes. I've heard," she agreed. "She hasn't forgotten. Every time she draws something at home, she tells me she's going to draw it again with her friend Edward when she sees him."

"You mean 'Edwood'" I joked, remembering the cute way little Maddie said my name.

Bella giggled. "Yes. _Edwood_," she agreed. We both laughed; she had one of those infectious laughs you couldn't help but join in on.

"Seriously," I said, once our laughter began to die down, "bring her in soon. I'd love to see her again." I felt a strange, unfamiliar tug inside, thinking of Maddie's sweet, cherub face.

Bella watched me curiously suddenly, her brows meeting in the middle, as if she were trying to read something in my eyes. "Yes. I think she'd like that too," she finally answered in a low voice.

We were quiet again. Both of us turned towards the balcony view, not sure what to say next.

"So…you live around here then?" I asked. I remembered Maddie mentioning they lived in 'Brootlyn.'

"Not too far," Bella answered. I hoped she'd elaborate, but after a few moments, it was obvious she wouldn't.

We continued gazing at the view before us, even though I would've been much happier gazing openly at the view next to me. Still, I examined her on the sly out of the corner of my eye. She wore a simple black dress, but it hugged her slim form just right, fitted enough to show off her delicate curves but not so tight that it left nothing to the imagination. Her hair cascaded loosely down her back and I found myself gripping on to the balcony railing tightly, my knuckles turning white as I fought an almost overwhelming urge to reach out and touch it. She would've seriously thought I was some sick bastard if I suddenly ran my fingers through her dark, rich hair. I gripped the balcony even tighter.

"It's a beautiful view isn't it?" I asked again, trying to distract myself from her hair.

She sighed, but kept her eyes across the river. "Yes, it is," she agreed finally. "Different from what I grew up with, but just as beautiful in its own way."

"What kind of view did you grow up with?" I used the excuse that she'd spoken to me to turn and face her again.

She sighed again before answering. "I grew up in Washington. In a small town called Forks that you've probably never heard of," she laughed, glancing at me quickly.

I chuckled. "Um, no. Can't say that I have."

She chuckled too. "I didn't think you would've. Anyway" -she continued- "Forks has the distinction of being the rainiest town in the Continental U.S."

I raised my eyebrows, surprised.

"It's also surrounded by plenty of beautiful, majestic mountains." She drew in a deep breath, her eyes taking on a far away look. "So on your typical Forks day, I'd step out of my house and look up, and instead of seeing tall buildings and skyscrapers, and the bright sun shining high overhead, I'd see these deep, rich green mountains, almost hidden beneath a heavy blanket of gray and white cloud cover. The tallest evergreens you could ever imagine would rise gracefully from the gray morning, as if they'd refused to fade quietly and had won some overnight battle with the darkness. And the mountains" –her voice became a hushed whisper, almost entrancing- "the mountains themselves seemed to reach all the way up to heaven. The constant cover of clouds usually made their peaks obscured, but it also gave them an air of Olympia. Sometimes I'd imagine that the gods themselves were hidden up there somewhere, watching over us, and I'd wonder…" her voice trailed off. Suddenly, she blinked a couple of times, as if shaking herself out of some far away memory. "Well, it was really very beautiful in a way you can't really appreciate until you don't have it anymore," she finished wistfully.

I gazed at her, open-mouthed. I had no idea how to respond to what she'd just said. The passion with which she'd just described her hometown overwhelmed me. But it also filled me with new questions. Like why she was here, so far away from a home she so obviously missed. Not that I wasn't thanking those hidden Olympic mountain gods that she was here.

"But this is pretty too," she added abruptly, pulling me out of my stupor. The simplicity of the statement made me laugh, and she laughed quietly with me.

"Yeah. No mountains though," I added apologetically.

"No, no mountains," she agreed.

"So do you at least get to see the river from where you live now?" I asked. I felt like she deserved some sort of compensation for having lost the view she'd described when she moved over here. For some reason, I really wanted her to like living in New York.

She chuckled, giving me a mischievous smile before turning back to the river. "No." She picked her head up high, as if she were about to say something extremely enlightening. Her voice was strong and serious. "Where I live now, when I walk to my living room window and look out, there before me, glowing bright and yellow and proud is a neon sign announcing that Ming's Dynasty Restaurant is available for eat-in" –she paused, giving me and impish grin- "or take-out."

We laughed hard.

"So that's my view, compliments of CCW." No sooner were the words out of her mouth that her face distorted in horror.

"Oh, I didn't mean it like that!" she added quickly. "I really love my apartment! It's close to everything, to the subway, to Sue's, to Alice-"

I frowned at first, confused, until I realized she thought she'd offended me somehow. But that was in the back of mind, because all I could feel was an instant concern that she and Maddie were now living in an apartment below the standards they deserved.

"Is it bad Bella? I can call Mrs. Cope from Personnel right now and have her start looking for something more suitable-" I had my phone out already, scrolling down the list for Mrs. Cope's private number.

Bella became very agitated; her look of horror growing. "No, no! Please don't do that! It's fine. I was just joking! Please forget I said anything! My apartment's perfect. Really! And the rent is affordable-," she continued.

I narrowed my eyes, my concern growing exponentially. Was affordable rent the deciding factor for her here? I was definitely going to have to look into this more. "Bella-" I started, but before I could say anything further, we were interrupted by a soft, warm voice behind us.

"There you are Edward. Alice told me you'd arrived." Esme approached me with a soft, gentle smile and put her arms around me when I turned to greet her. I hugged her back.

"Hey mom." Esme pulled herself away slightly to look at me. As she gave me the parental once-over, I studied her back. I had to admit, even though she was my mother, she looked as beautiful as ever. Her long, bronze hair, a shade lighter than my own, was pinned up neatly in a bun. She gave me a soft smile, her green eyes flashing as she examined me up and down, and even though the smile was full of love, she also somehow managed to throw some reproach in there with it, the way only a mother could.

"You've been keeping yourself well hidden these past few weeks Edward," she admonished gently. "I was beginning to worry."

"I've been busy mom," I tried to explain, but the purse of her lips told me that she wasn't buying it.

"Yes, I'm sure you have," she said, bringing her hands down to grab my own. "We have lots of catching up to do." She grinned and her eyes sparkled in the setting sun. She turned quickly to look at Bella, who stood off to the side, quietly watching us.

"Bella, has Edward been keeping you company?" she asked, letting go of one of my hands to reach out and place her hand on Bella's arm. I furrowed my brows, confused by the friendliness in the gesture; as if they already knew each other.

"Um," Bella stammered, returning my mother's smile, "Yes," she replied in a low voice, chewing on her lip again.

"Oh, good then. I'm sorry if I left you here alone but I needed to go greet some people quickly, lest they say Esme Cullen has bad manners," she laughed, taking her other hand and pressing it lightly to her chest.

"No, that's fine," Bella assured her quickly. "I was just admiring the setting sun over the skyline." I watched her closely as she spoke. She continued worrying her lip, and once again, I was momentarily distracted by the action. But from the corner of my eye, I could see Esme watching me curiously, before quickly glancing back over at Bella. Her head might as well have been made of glass for how clearly I could see the wheels starting to turn in that well-groomed head of hers. Immediately, I tried to compose my features into some sort of blank, meaningless expression, but I was almost sure it was too late. No woman had ever been able to read me like my mother could; I'd never let any woman get close enough to try.

"So Edward, Rosalie and Emmett tell us that Bella's been a real find for the Agency." Bella's face turned crimson. "And Alice and Jasper are simply in love with her and her little girl." She paused before entwining her free arm into my own, bringing Bella and I closer, and making us face each other directly. I almost smirked at her obviousness.

"What do _you_ think of her?" Esme was nothing if not direct.

Both of us spoke at once.

"Um, we don't really…"

"I think…"

Esme's smile widened as she looked from Bella to me and back. She smelled a quick and easy victory.

"Edward dahling. I've been waiting for you!" Startled, we all turned towards the bedroom, the direction from which the voice had come. Tanya quickly approached me, sliding her arm through my free one. My mother's smile - so wide and triumphant just a couple of seconds ago - faltered, and she quickly dropped her arm from me, as if she were afraid to catch Tanya-cooties just by being physically linked to me while Tanya was. So much for the quick and easy victory.

"Tanya. I wasn't aware you were here." The corners of my mother's mouth twitched down in disapproval before she quickly composed herself and put on a blank face. Esme Cullen had been raised to keep her composure above all else. Only those of us closest to her could tell when she was really upset. She clasped her hands in front of her. "How have you been?"

"Esme dahling. I've been well, thank you." Tanya glanced quickly at Bella, who still stood facing me with Esme at her other side. Eyeing her up and down, she quickly pressed herself into my side and brought up her other arm to hold onto me even tighter. She looked back at Esme and offered her a fake smile. "Even better now that Edward's back from his holiday abroad."

"I wasn't on holiday Tanya," I clarified.

"Of course you weren't," She looked up at me, pouting. "Because, I wasn't there with you."

I pursed my lips and sighed, wanting to remind her about how things stood between us. But here and now was not the time or place to get into it with her. I'd set her straight – again – later.

I turned back to face Bella, painfully aware that common courtesy dictated that I now had to introduce the witch hanging off of me to her, and really not wanting to. Bella watched us both now with cool, inexpressive eyes. I cleared my throat nervously. "Uh Tanya, this is-"

"Edward," Tanya cut me off, pulling me by the arm and dragging me over to the edge of the balcony. "You were right! This view is beautiful! It's almost as lovely as the view of Central Park from your bedroom window! I could certainly see us waking up to this too!"

"Uh," I began, having no idea what to say. What the flying fuck was she talking about? I sure as all hell didn't remember using the pronoun 'we' when I'd mentioned waking up to the river view before.

Behind me, my mother cleared her throat. When I turned, I could tell by her expression that she was clearly upset at the rude and shitty way Tanya had just acted. Bella just looked cool and unreadable, which was making me freakin' nervous.

"Edward, I'm going to take _Bella_ and introduce her to your father." She gently put her hand on Bella's arm again. We _will_ talk later," she confirmed, giving Tanya's back a hard glance before moving her disappointed eyes back to me.

As both women turned around, I stole one last look at Bella, offering her a small smile. She watched me expressionless before turning to leave. I could hear them talking as they walked away slowly.

"Esme, I'd love to meet Alice's dad quickly, but I really should be going. I promised the sitter I'd pick up my daughter by nine-thirty. She's not used to being up past nine, and its going to be a late night for her as it is." I heard a quiet snort coming from Tanya, whose back was still turned, facing the river.

"Of course Bella," my mother said gently, patting Bella's arm. Esme spared me a quick look backwards on her way out of the bedroom. "I'll see you later Edward."

I sighed deeply as both women exited the room, and turned to face Tanya. I spoke to her in a low and hard voice, wanting her to know that I hadn't found her behavior amusing or cute. "Tanya, that was really rude."

"What was rude dahling?" she purred, turning to face me and placing both her palms across my chest. She pouted her lips, trying to be sexy, but it did nothing for me. Her dress was too short and tight and her red lipstick made her look slutty. Once again I asked myself what in holy hell I'd been thinking to call her up tonight.

I pursed my lips, a stream of expletives all directed at her burning a trail from my lungs to my tongue, but I stopped myself before calling her the one word I'd been forbidden by Esme to ever call a woman. As much as she deserved it, I just wanted to get her the fuck home and hopefully never hear from her again. Tanya could be a vengeful little witch. It would be better to just get her out of here, let her know this was the last time she and I ever went anywhere together, and that would be that. I didn't want to start any more arguing than completely necessary tonight. "Just…forget it."

She smiled at me seductively. I rolled my eyes and turned from her, facing the skyline. Eventually, she turned also, going on and on for a few more minutes about the differences between Manhattan and Brooklyn or some shit. I tuned her out, closing my eyes. Behind my lids, all I could see was the memory of the glow of the setting sun, illuminating Bella Swan like an angel.

After about five minutes, I couldn't listen to Tanya's annoying voice anymore. I felt restless pull, as if some invisible magnet were tugging me in another direction.

"I'm going back to join the party," I explained to Tanya, pushing myself away from the balcony and walking away without waiting for a response from her.

"I'll come with you," she answered, grabbing on to the bottom of the back of my shirt and pulling herself along from it. I rolled my eyes and kept walking.

When we reached the party, I scanned the room quickly. Bella was standing in the middle of the room with my family, a knitted shawl wrapped around her shoulders. She faced my father, who was laughing pleasantly at something she'd said. Even from this distance, I could tell he was already completely taken by her. His mouth relaxed into a crooked smile, something I'd inherited from him, and his deep blue eyes danced with obvious approval. Without stopping to think, I started moving in their direction, Tanya still trailing me behind.

Bella had her back to me as I approached, still in deep conversation with my father. Alice was the first to see me. She frowned as she glanced behind me.

"Edward, Bella was just telling us the funniest stories about her home town. Too bad you missed it all." Her tone sounded like she was anything but sorry I'd missed it.

Bella turned around quickly upon hearing Alice. When she caught sight of me, she shot me another cold, hard stare, which wouldn't have jarred me as much if her features hadn't immediately morphed into a pleasant and warm smile once she turned back to my father and the rest of my family.

And although anybody with half a god-damned brain should've known better at that point, I tried to join in. "I'd love to hear your stories," I offered hopefully, coming to stand next to her. Unfortunately, I hadn't thought it through just right, since Tanya, like a literal friggin' tail, was still right on me.

Seeing me next to her, Bella turned to face me again and her eyes were even colder now, if humanly possible. I repressed a shiver, and not a pleasant one. Her look clearly said 'Are you fucking kidding me or are you out of your god-damned mind?' before she turned back to Alice with a huge smile. _What the hell? Why did she keep doing that?_

"While I'd love to stay and chat with all of you, I really do have to go." Disappointed groans came from everyone in my family.

"Bella, are you sure you don't need me to call you a cab?" Jasper asked from just behind Alice.

Bella looked over at Jasper warmly. "No thanks Jasper. You know I'm only a few blocks away" – _He did?_ –"It's a nice night. I'd rather walk."

She stuck out her hand to shake my father's. He took it kindly. "It was great to finally meet you Bella. Alice hasn't been able to stop talking about you."

"It was good to meet you too, Dr. Cullen," Bella responded.

"Please, call me Carlisle," my father insisted. "Dr. Cullen's my father." I rolled my eyes. Jeez, and he wondered where I got my lines from.

"Carlisle then," Bella agreed, turning to face Esme.

"Now Bella, don't forget about brunch this Sunday. I'm just dying to meet your little girl," Esme exclaimed as she gave Bella a warm hug.

"I won't forget," Bella confirmed, turning to give Alice a hug now.

"I'll pick them up bright and early mom. Don't worry!" Alice grinned.

Bella turned to Jasper and Emmet and gave them each a big smile and a warm wave. "See you both at work," she exclaimed. "And thank you again for inviting me. I had a great time."

She turned, sparing me a quick glance. I thought I saw her eyes flash to Tanya behind me, although almost imperceptibly, before quickly returning to me for one brief moment. All the warmth that had been there as she said her goodbyes to my family had now leached out of her eyes. "Edward," she said in parting, in an inexpressive tone, and turned away.

_What. The. Hell_. What was _that?_ Everyone else got a hug, a happy wave, friggin' sunny, cheery smiles, and I get one word. One. Freakin'. Word. And just my own freakin' name at that.

Pissed off and confused but still unable to make myself break away, I followed her to the door with my eyes. Through the crowd, I saw James Smyth making his way towards Bella. She stopped a few feet from the door, adjusting her pocketbook and her shawl. One look at his face let me know exactly what his intentions were. He held a wine glass in each hand, and when she looked up from her pocketbook, he tried to shove one of them into her hand. She gave him an apologetic smile and said something. He leaned in and whispered something in her ear, making her creamy cheeks turn pink as he pulled back. She shook her head at him slowly, saying something in response, before smiling one last time and walking towards the door.

And without thinking about what I was doing, I started walking over to him, ready to bash his fucking brains in. Thankfully, I'd finally lost my tail; it'd made a beeline over to the bar once Bella had turned to leave.

When I reached James, I could see his eyes still following Bella's retreating form, his gaze intently on her ass. "Motherfucker," I gritted through my teeth angrily, bumping into him forcefully and causing him to spill his white wine on the crotch of his pants.

"Hey, watch where you're-" he began, before looking up to see me. His expression changed and he forced a grin.

"Edward. Oh hey man, don't worry about it-" he started, missing my murderous glare and thinking I had any fucking intentions of apologizing for making him look like he'd just pissed himself.

"Maybe if you'd kept your fucking eyes on what you were holding, then that shit wouldn't have happened," I growled. Confusion crossed his face before his slow ass finally figured out what I was talking about. He tried to disguise his scowl with a chuckle.

"Thanks for the advice," he mumbled.

"It'd do you good to remember it," I hissed, my fists clenching and unclenching at my sides.

"What-"

Jasper came up behind me and clapped me on the shoulder, turning me around before I could knock the shit out of James.

"Edward, I've been looking for you." He pulled me away, his voice breaking me out of my homicidal urgencies.

When we were a few feet away he turned to look at me. "What the hell was all that about?"

I drew in a deep breath, still feeling agitated and ready to pummel James into oblivion. "Nothing," I lied.

"It didn't look like nothin'."

I shook my head. "I've just never liked that guy. What the hell is he doing here anyway?"

Jasper shrugged. "I don't know. I just invited a few people from the office. Didn't know you had it out for him," he chuckled.

"Yeah, well…" I didn't know what else to say. I hadn't known I had it out for him until tonight either.

"He seems to have taken a fancy towards Bella Swan. Been oglin' her since she got here, guess he's out of luck since she left early. Waited too long to make his move."

My nostrils flared involuntarily and my jaw locked. I could feel my breathing coming in hard and heavy.

Jasper watched me curiously. "Hey man, you okay?"

I nodded, unable to trust myself enough to speak. What would I tell him anyway? The way I'd reacted was completely irrational. I had no right to Bella, and I had no right to keep any other man from taking his chances with her. But that didn't mean watching it happen wasn't like driving a freakin' stake through my heart.

We reached the rest of my family. I looked around; Tanya was standing by the bar, keeping a few of the guys there entertained and having them hanging on her every word, just the way she liked it. And that was just fine by me; whatever kept her as far away from me as possible.

I was in a shitty mood now though. The rest of the party went by in a blur. My mother and Alice barely said a word to me, and my father kept looking at me with a frown on his face. My bringing Tanya to this party reconfirmed for him what he'd thought of me for years. That I was a complete and total screw up. That life to me was one big giant party. I'd been the black sheep of the family in his eyes for years.

Whatever. I had other things to think about anyway. Like how the hell I could go from adhering to my policy of strict avoidance so well for the past couple of weeks, to almost knocking the shit out of a guy for offering Bella a glass of wine and staring at her ass. And furthermore, how Bella could go from smiling and sharing with me one minute, to shooting daggers at me the next?

And most importantly, why the fuck did I even care?

"I thought you'd broken up with Tanya." My father's voice was deceivingly mild as he came to sit next to me. I looked over at him. He was trying really hard to keep his disappointment in check, but it showed through anyway. The slight twitch at the edge of his eyes gave him away. I took a gulp from my beer before answering him.

"I did."

Carlisle was silent for a few seconds. "Then what's she doing here with you then?"

"I needed a distraction."

Another long pause. I could practically feel the herculean effort to keep his mouth closed, to not say the words that were burning at the tip of his tongue. In the end, it must've been too much of an effort. "You needed a distraction? A distraction from what exactly? Your whole life is one big distraction."

I sighed, bringing down the bottle of beer on the coffee table with a loud thud. "Jesus, are we really gonna do this now?" I asked under my breath, looking at my father in his deep, blue eyes. "Now? In the middle of your daughter and future son-in-law's party?"

My father answered in a matching low voice, meeting my gaze. "I'm not doing anything here son." He spoke in that authoritative voice he used with the rest of his colleagues at the hospital. Unfortunately, part of the problem was that I wasn't one of his colleagues. "I just can't help wondering when you're finally going to leave that life behind" – his eyes wandered to Tanya, who had the men by the bar tripping over themselves to get near her now, including that dickhead James – "and grow up."

I stared down at the beer bottle I'd set down on Alice's coffee table, coaster-less. She was gonna raise hell when she noticed that later, but I'd be long gone by then. Let Jasper deal with her crazy shit. I was pissed off at her too. She should've freakin' told me…

Anyway, that wasn't the matter at hand right now.

"In case you hadn't noticed," – my voice was low but I could hear it shaking. Nothing, and I mean _nothing,_ got me as riled up as my father's periodic 'grow up' speech – "I've been a big boy for a _long_ time now. I've got my own place, I run my own business, and I haven't touched one damn cent from grandmother's trust fund in years. I make my own way and pay my own bills." I picked up the bottle again and took another big gulp, before facing him again. "I _am_ a man now, and I'm sorry if it's not the man you want me to be."

My father's steady, even gaze didn't waver. There was a reason he was the top medical surgeon in the Northeast. The man had nerves of fucking steel.

"There's more to being a grown up, to being a real man Edward, than paying your own bills and running your own business."

"Oh yeah? And what's that? Why don't you tell me what else I need to do to prove myself to you and then maybe we can save ourselves this little speech every few months? What else, other than going back to medical school, can I do to make you happy?"

Because that's what this was all about. He'd never forgive me for dropping out of med school. It didn't matter that I was the only one of his three children who'd ever even shown an interest in following in his footsteps once. It didn't matter that I'd graduated from Dartmouth at the top of my class. It didn't matter that I was doing the same thing Emmett was doing, running the same Agency. He'd never given Emmett anything less than his full support and encouragement. But when it came to me, it was all different. Because when Carlisle looked at me, all he saw was a failure. I'd failed at carrying on the Cullen Medical Legacy, and he'd never forgive me for that.

"Edward, this has nothing to do with medical school. That was years ago," he insisted. I pursed my lips and grunted. Yeah right. "And I can't tell you what it is you need to do to grow into the man I know you can be. That's something you need to figure out on your own."

I put my bottle down again with an even louder thud, which got Alice's attention from where she stood talking to some people I didn't recognize. Her eyes narrowed and she shot me an irritated look when she saw the bottle didn't have a coaster. _Yeah, fuck you too, _I glared back at her. I'd had enough of this party. I stood up, looking down at my father, who looked as cool and composed as always.

"Well, then I guess these little father/son talks'll have to continue, because I'm at a complete loss."

He stared at me for a moment with those cool, blue eyes, before something like frustration seeped into them. "I know you are. That's the problem."

"See you later dad."

He continued to look at me with those discouraged eyes. "Goodbye son."

I walked over to the bar where Tanya was still entertaining. "I'm leaving Tanya. Are you ready?" If she'd decided to go home with one of these assholes, it would save me a lot of trouble.

She looked back at her flock of followers apologetically. "Sorry boys. I've gotta go." Disappointed groans followed her departure. I rolled my eyes as I walked away. The problem with Tanya – well, one of the problems with Tanya – was that her own rules didn't apply to her. While we'd been together, she'd always had a tit fit if I so much as looked at another girl. But she'd never had a problem throwing herself at any man that caught her eye while I was around. And the thing was I'd never given two shits any way.

I walked over to the kitchen, where I'd seen Esme enter last, and found her in there helping Alice clean up, putting glasses in the dishwasher and emptying trays of left over hors d'oeuvres into the trash bin. Esme smiled when she saw me, but her smile tightened when she caught sight of Tanya beside me.

"Edward sweetheart, are you leaving?" she asked as she came to take my hands.

"Yeah. I've gotta be in the office early tomorrow."

"Will you be joining us for brunch on Sunday?" she asked with hopeful eyes. I hadn't heard about any brunch plans, but before I could answer, Alice cut in from the fridge, where she was putting some food away. She didn't even bother looking my way as she spoke.

"No mom. I'm sure Edward has other things to do. It'll just be us girls on Sunday. You can catch up with Edward some other time." She mumbled something else under her breath I didn't understand. Her voice was impassive, but she was obviously irritated.

And I'd had enough of her shitty attitude since I got here. Friggin' begs me to come to her stupid party and then she treats me like shit the whole time.

I glared at her tiny back, where she continued to stuff leftovers into her Subzero fridge.

"Goodbye to you too, you nasty witch."

That did it. Alice whirled around furiously to face me. She was one of the few people that knew what I really meant when I called a woman a witch. We'd been brought up by the same woman, after all; taught the same rules of behavior.

"Go to hell asshole!"

"Kids!" my mother scolded.

"See if I come to one of your dumb ass parties next time!"

"See if I invite you next time!"

"Alice and Edward!" my mother's voice rose an octave. She took a deep breath before addressing me again in a slightly calmer voice. "Edward, I'll give you a call during the week. Maybe you and I can get together at some other point this weekend?" she offered, trying to keep the peace.

"Sure mom." I gave my mother a crooked smile. I knew she loved them. Behind her, I could hear Alice muttering to herself under her breath while she continued to shove things into her packed fridge.

"See…favor…again. …no…what….missed…"

"What are you muttering about over there Shorty? You got something to say, woman up!"

Alice wheeled around.

"Kiss. My. A-"

"Alice!" my mother reprimanded. "That is enough!"

I grinned at my sister triumphantly. I'd always been mom's favorite. Alice scowled back. After a couple of seconds, she dropped the scowl, opting for an evil smile instead. "It's really a shame you won't be joining us on Sunday Edward. You see, while you're in bed Sunday morning, having the same tired, cold, boring crusty leftovers for breakfast," –her eyes flickered purposefully to Tanya- "we'll all be enjoying warm, fresh food and warm, fresh" – her eyes quickly went to Tanya again – "company."

Now it was my turn to scowl. Unfortunately though, I couldn't think of one damn smart comeback for her. "I won't be having _any_ leftovers on Sunday, or any other day of the week for that matter. Not that its any of your business," I clarified, knowing damn well we weren't talking about food. "So I don't know what the hell you're talking about."

"Whatever Edward." Alice turned her back on me again, continuing to clean up her kitchen. "Enjoy the rest of your night," she exclaimed, waving her hand in the air dismissively. "

Before I said something I'd regret to my extremely annoying little sister, I marched out of the kitchen, Tanya trailing just behind me. Not the brightest star in the sky, she'd completely missed Alice's insinuations.

"Self-righteous witch!" I mumbled to myself through the elevator ride. Tanya just looked at me, saying nothing. Although she had no idea what Alice and I had been talking about, she knew better than to try to talk to me right now.

Although if I were to put aside how pissed off Alice and my dad had gotten me tonight and just be completely honest, I'd be able to admit they were completely right about my bringing Tanya over. It had been a huge mistake, and I'd known it since I'd let the invitation pop out of my mouth.

Once we were in my car and my irritation started to wane, Tanya jumped right in and started chewing my ear off, talking on and on about all the different parties she'd been to lately, the same spoiled and shallow people we'd been hanging around with for years making the same empty circuits. And honestly, up until a few weeks ago, it'd been me making those same rounds, partying it up with those same people. I'd been one of them, without a doubt.

Except I didn't feel like one of them anymore, and I didn't _want_ to be like one of them. I wanted more. I _needed_ more.

But more of _what?_ _That_ right there was the million dollar question. Or was it?

We pulled up in front of Tanya's Tribeca building in record time. I'd been a bit liberal with those yellow lights, trying to end the night with Tanya as quickly as possible. As soon as I cut the engine, Tanya turned to me with an unmistakably - or what would've been unmistakably to anyone else - seductive smile.

"Come up for a nightcap Edward." It wasn't a request.

I took a deep breath, knowing full well this was my own damn fault, and preparing myself for Tanya's tantrum. "Tanya, I want to thank you for coming with me to Alice and Jasper's party tonight, especially on such short notice." Tanya began moving in closer to me as I spoke, bringing one hand to rest dangerously close to my nether region. I cleared my throat, shifting in my seat uncomfortably and trying to move away from her wandering hand. I had to speak quickly; it was starting to get pretty hot in this car, and for once, not in a good way.

"But-" I shifted away again, my ass practically bumping up against the driver's side door. "But we both know it probably wasn't a good idea."

Tanya's roaming hand came to rest right on my crotch. Her other hand came up to my forehead, where she tugged playfully on a few strands of hair that had fallen over my face. I could feel the beads of perspiration starting to form where my hairline began. She gave me a bemused smile. "Why not dahling?" she breathed into my face.

Trapped and unable to move back any further without opening up the car door and letting my ass fall out, I grabbed both Tanya's hands carefully yet decisively and placed them on her lap. She rolled her eyes, but the seductive smile remained on her lips. I looked right in her eyes as I spoke, wanting to be as unambiguous as possible. "Because you and I, we're just too different now Tanya. We want different things."

She chuckled but kept my gaze. "Oh I don't think so dahling. I think we want exactly the same thing," she purred, bringing both hands up to my hair.

I rolled my eyes. Gripping her arms again, I pulled them down and placed them firmly on her lap. "No Tanya. We don't," I clarified. I remembered what she'd said to me earlier tonight. That she and I were the same, rich and spoiled, and that there was nothing wrong with that. "I don't want to keep living day by day for nothing more than simple gratification. Money and sex," I grimaced, disgusted by what I'd let my life become. "That's not enough. There's got to be more to life than just that."

Tanya snorted, her seductive smile turning impatient. "Oh Edward. You've become such a philosopher lately." She dropped the smile altogether. "Let me make things clear for you dahling." She spoke slowly, as if explaining something obvious to a five-year old. "There. Is. Nothing. Else. There is you. And there are your desires. Luckily for you, you're in a position to fulfill any one of those desires at your whim." She sighed, appearing exasperated at having to clarify something so self-evident. "That is what this life is all about. We need to be grateful that we're part of the privileged few that can fully appreciate this life, and take full advantage of it."

Disgusted by her twisted logic, I turned away, facing the windshield. In the night's reflection, my features looked hard and tired. "I'm sorry Tanya, but I just don't buy it. I refuse to believe that. I refuse to continue living that way."

Tanya laughed loudly, like I'd just told the funniest joke. I kept my eyes on the windshield. Her laughter died down suddenly, and out of the corner of my eye, I could see her watching me with one eyebrow raised, as if a new thought had abruptly occurred to her.

"What's really going on here Edward?"

I didn't answer her; I was done trying to explain myself. I just wanted her out of my damn car already.

Her eyes widened, as if she'd just figured something out. "It's that girl isn't it?"

I felt myself stiffen. "What girl?"

"Don't play stupid! The girl from the party tonight! The one you were eye-fucking when I found you on your sister's balcony! What is she, your latest flavor of the month?"

Irritation seeped into my veins at her crude insinuations, but I tried to control myself and not give in to her obvious goading. The last thing I wanted right now was to stretch out this argument by adding fuel to the fire. "First of all, that's disgusting Tanya. Second, I don't know what the hell you're talking about."

Tanya was quiet for a few seconds, studying me intently. Her staring was starting to make me uncomfortable, but abruptly, she broke out into fits of laughter again. "Wait a minute! You're thinking she might be more than just your flavor of the month, aren't you?"

I didn't answer her.

She began cackling uncontrollably. "The hard-to-get-single-mommy type? Is that what you're into now?" she chortled. "Oh dahling, you are just too precious sometimes!"

My jaw tightened and I had to fight the urge to turn and shove her cackling ass out of my car. She finally stopped laughing and began gathering up her pocketbook and straightening out her short skirt. I sighed in relief, thinking she was finally going to get the fuck out of the car without another word, when her hand suddenly shot out like a flash and landed forcefully right on my testicles, tightening around them hard. I winced in unimaginable agony.

"After you've fucked her brains out and grown tired of playing house, give me a call. We'll have some real fun dahling."

As infuriated as her words made me, I was in too much pain to be able to make any coherent retort. All I could think of was whether it was possible for testicles to actually shrivel and fall off, because it sure felt like that's what was happening to mine. After what felt like hours, she took mercy on my contorted face and let go, opening the door and walking out slowly, as if she hadn't just greatly reduced my chances to procreate.

I struggled to catch my breath, and after taking more than a few deep breaths and letting them out slowly, the pain finally receded just enough for me to turn the car on. I drove away, pissed off as all hell and just wanting to get my ass home and soak my balls in some ice-cold water. Crazy freakin' witch!

Freakin' Alice and her stupid parties. I should've just kept my ass home tonight.

But if I hadn't gone to Alice's party tonight, I wouldn't have gotten the chance to see Bella in a setting other than the office. I wouldn't have had a chance to see her in her beautiful little black dress, with her hair billowing gently in the late summer breeze. I wouldn't have had the chance to see the sun setting behind her while she spoke to me about Maddie, about her hometown, about her apartment in Brooklyn. It'd been a short and simple conversation, but the truth was, those five minutes I'd spent talking to her were so worth the shit I'd had to endure with my dad, with Alice _and_ with Ball-Buster Denali, that witch, a thousand times over. Those five minutes with Bella had been the highlight of my day; hell, if I were being honest, the highlight of the last few months.

"What the hell is wrong with you man? You gotta stop thinking that way," I mumbled to myself, making the turn off of the Brooklyn Bridge towards the Gowanus Expressway. My eyes opened wide, realizing too late what I'd done. "Shit!" I yelled, banging on the steering wheel with one hand. Lost in my thoughts about Bella -about a woman who obviously wanted nothing to do with me and who I had no business thinking of in the first place- I'd wandered back into Brooklyn instead of down the FDR towards Central Park West, where I belonged. "Damn it!" I growled, turning back down into Alice's neighborhood and looking for some place to make a U-turn back onto the bridge. Under normal circumstances, I would've just stopped in at Jasper and Alice's again for a few minutes before heading back uptown. But I didn't want to see anyone up in that loft anymore tonight. I didn't want to see anyone. Anyone except for maybe…

Bella.

She didn't live too far from Alice. She'd told me that herself out on the balcony, and then as she was leaving she'd reminded Jasper that she was only a few blocks away.

But a few blocks in what direction?

I had no friggin' clue.

Jasper and Alice obviously knew. But Alice was being a Grade A witch tonight. There was no way in hell I was going to try to ask her. I could've asked Jasper. He could've at least pointed me in the right direction. But what would I tell him? 'Hey Jasper man, you mind pointing me in the direction of Bella Swan's apartment? I need to drop in on her at eleven p.m. on a Wednesday night to discuss one of her designs.' Yeah right, as if that shit would fly.

And damn it, what the hell would I do even if I did know where she lived? There was no way in hell she'd ever open the door for me. And what excuse would I even give for showing up on her doorstep? She'd probably call the fucking cops on me or some shit, and I'd spend the night in jail, covering my ass with both hands; a perfect ending to a perfect night. I could see the Page Six headline already: Millionaire Playboy Edward Cullen Arrested for Stalking Employee. I snorted and shook my head, wandering aimlessly down the streets of DUMBO. I watched people, still wearing tank tops and shorts and flip flops, making their way home on a late weeknight; or wandering into cafés that still remained open, taking advantage of the last few weeks of warm weather; or some, like me, wandering the streets without a predetermined destination, looking for friends, looking for entertainment, looking for love…

I pulled the car over as soon as the sign caught my attention. At first, I couldn't understand why the sign seemed so familiar. I knew I'd never been in there. Hell, I didn't even like Chinese food all that much. I sat in the car, my eyebrows furrowed and my head tilted to one side, staring at the glowing, bright yellow neon sign that proudly announced that Ming's Dynasty Restaurant was available for eat-in or take-out.

I'd found her.

Or at least, I'd found her block.

My eyes grew wide as I scanned the area surreptitiously, studying every brown-haired female in the vicinity carefully. My heart felt as if it were about to jump out of my chest every time I spotted someone with the slightest resemblance to Bella, until common sense finally hit me and I remembered that it was eleven freakin' o'clock on a Wednesday night. That Bella was probably upstairs in whatever apartment she lived in, safe at home with little Maddie, watching TV or something, or comfortably tucked into her own bed for the night.

God, I was such a fucking loser.

But shit, since I'd already come this far, and I was already way beyond denying I was one sick mother-fucker, my eyes went back to the Ming's Dynasty Restaurant sign. What was it she'd said about the sign? She could see it from her living room window.

I looked across the street from the restaurant. That meant she had to live in one of the buildings directly across the street, otherwise she wouldn't be able to make out the sign from her window. I studied the buildings carefully. From my perspective, I'd say there were three that fit the bill, from where one would be able to see the yellow sign clearly from their window. My eyes traveled up and down the windows of each of the three buildings, looking for some sign, for some clue, that would tell me which window Bella and little Maddie lay beyond.

I snorted again, completely disgusted with myself. "Un-fucking-believable," I muttered, turning the key in the ignition and getting ready to hightail it outta there before I did something really stalkerish, like maybe get out of the car and go read the names off every mailbox in each one of those buildings.

Hmm.

"Ugh!" I grimaced, realizing what I was doing. "You are really one sick moth-"

A sudden flash of movement from one of the windows across the street caught my eye. With my hand still on the ignition, I turned and looked up towards where the movement had come from.

Behind one of the curtained, second floor windows in the building right in the middle of the block, a slender figure remained paused; the top of her frame bent slightly forward as if she'd been walking by and for some reason had stopped suddenly. I couldn't make out too much, except for a basic shape and long, flowing hair; the light-colored curtain was too heavy, providing the person behind it with the privacy she deserved in her dwellings.

But I knew it was Bella.

Not because of anything definite in her shape; not because of mad spying skills; but just because…because I could _feel_ it damn it! Somewhere deep inside of me, I could _feel_ that it was Bella I was looking at. I felt the same acceleration in my heart rate, the same quickening of my pulse that was always present whenever she was around. My hands dropped down to my sides, and the sides of my mouth turned up in a huge, involuntary grin.

God, I was pathetic, and I couldn't have cared less at that point. I was looking at Bella, albeit behind a closed curtain, but what the hell, it was something.

My mind flooded with questions. What had she been about to do? Why was she still up? Had she been watching TV? Was Maddie still up too? Was Bella a reader? What kind of books did she read? Did she like the classics or more modern literature? Had she been reading a book with the light turned low, on her soft, living room couch, or maybe even in bed? The thought of Bella's bed took my mind in a new direction. I could imagine how soft and warm it would feel to lie in her bed, to feel the warmth of her emanating under a soft goose-down, like a giant space heater set on high, to feel the tickle of her hair on my face and jaw as I put my arms around her gently, pulling her into me and tickling her face with my-

"Hey buddy," a loud, gruff voice suddenly broke me out of my thoughts. "Whatsa matta? Can't read the signs or sumthin'? This here's a no stopping zone. Move it out!" The traffic cop banged on the roof of my car twice with the palm of his hand before moving on down the block, looking for more violators of our city's fine traffic regulations. I sighed deeply, irritated at having been broken out of my stalker fantasies. Only in New York would there still be traffic cops out at this time of night.

I took one last look at the little window to paradise that lay across the street. Bella's shadow had moved away already, maybe back to her book, maybe back to the TV, maybe back to bed. I begrudgingly pulled the car out, turning it back towards the Brooklyn Bridge, towards my large, cold and lonely apartment on Central Park West. "Good night, sweet Bella. Good night little Maddie," I murmured to myself as I drove down the dark city streets with a huge smile plastered on my face. I was so elated by the small glimpse I'd caught of Bella, and by the peace it brought me to imagine her and Maddie safely snuggled into their beds for the night, that I couldn't even feel guilty about the shameless stalker in me. Nor could I honestly claim that I wouldn't do it again, even if it was just to catch a glimpse of Bella walking by her window on her way to pick up a crayon Maddie had left on the floor, or to serve dinner for her and Maddie, or to switch off a light, or any of the other thousands of things I could imagine her doing behind that closed curtain.

Crawled into my own lonely bed that night, I formulated another plan for dealing with the Bella issue.

I wasn't an idiot, and I wasn't blind. I knew what all the magazines and papers said about me. Just because I'd inherited many of my father's physical features, as well as his money, it was automatically assumed that I was, as the papers would say, a catch. But I knew better.

I was a fake. A phony. I'd spent the past few years living a selfish and reproachful existence, not caring for anyone other than myself; and my family at times; but even they had fallen by the wayside while I pursued my own self-absorbed interests. But knowing that didn't make me any better of a person now. Because even though now I felt as if I were beginning to wake up from some long, deep haze I'd been living in for years, even though something inside was telling me that there was more out there, I had no fucking clue what to do next. I was a fucking mess, and it would be even more selfish and self-absorbed on my part to try to involve anyone else in my mess.

But that didn't mean we couldn't at least be friends, did it? And Maddie. I could be a friend to little Maddie too, if Bella would let me.

I chuckled humorlessly in my empty bed, turning over roughly to my other side. Fuck, I didn't even know if she'd even want to be my friend. For all I friggin' knew, she had no interest in having any other interaction with me beyond the office. The thought of that sent a sharp spasm of pain through the organ in my body that I was just now beginning to see still worked, and I cringed, alone in my bed.

I _had_ to somehow convince her to be my friend. It was crazy, this need I suddenly felt. But I couldn't deny it to myself any longer. And maybe, just maybe, once we were friends, I'd be able to breathe a huge sigh of relief, letting go of this aching knot inside of me, and that would be enough. That _had_ to be enough. I smiled to myself and closed my eyes, feeling my consciousness drift away in a cloud of dreams about a certain brunette standing out on a balcony with the sun setting majestically over her.

**A/N: So on top of everything else, our little Stalkerward (that's what Danna named him) has daddy issues. Who still loves him anyway? (Raises both hands up high!)**

**Bella'll be back next chapter. Let's see what she thinks of our little Edward now, after the whole Tanya debacle. Jeez, if its not one girl all over him, its another. **


	5. Chapter 5 I Won't Look In Your Eyes

**A/N: Alright, so last chapter we got a glimpse of Edward's struggle to figure out his feelings. Time to get into Bella's head now…**

**Thanks to my Beta Danna0724 for helping me out with this baby.**

**All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a while.**

**Chapter 6 – I Won't Look In Your Eyes**

_You were disgusted with the women who were always speaking and looking, and thinking for your approbation alone. I roused, and interested you, because I was so unlike them. -__**Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen**__  
_

**BPOV**

_**PAGE SIX**_

_**Sept. 6, 2010**_

_**A Real Central Perk.**_

_**LUCKY females out for an evening stroll in Central Park yesterday evening got their La Perla panties in a bunch when they spotted hunky millionaire Edward Cullen enjoying a leisurely jog around the West Side running track. Though drenched in perspiration and dressed in dark sweats and sneakers, he apparently still looked good enough to get these women to stop and stare, mouths hanging open, as he passed them by. Guess he gives new meaning to the Styx lyrics, 'Hot times, summer in the city!' "He could sweat all over me any time!" said one gaping spectator; that is, after she was finally able to pick her drooling mouth off the floor and form a coherent sentence. Wonder what on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali would think about that…**_

'Ugh!' I grimaced, flipping the page quickly. It was just disgusting how they wasted editorial space in these newspapers. Worse, was the shameful waste of resources used to print this garbage. Apparently there was nothing more important going on in this city than tracking every single step Edward Cullen made. For how big New York City appeared to be, it still seemed to have a small town mentality; not too different from Forks, I supposed. Nosy neighbors who couldn't mind their own business…

I mean, really. Who cared if Edward apparently jogged through Central Park every damn evening? Who cared if he'd been spotted in Long Island last weekend taking his family's yacht out for a ride? Who gave a hoot if he'd been spotted last Wednesday night, the night of Alice and Jasper's party, picking up his -quote- on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali -close quotes- for a night out?

_Apparently you do_, a little voice inside of me reproached. Ugh. I closed my eyes, fisting my hands around the sad excuse for a newspaper currently on my desk. Why _was_ I reading this crap? I had so many better things to do than read about Edward Cullen's sordid life. Like finish prepping for the client meeting we were having with the heads of EverSoft in five minutes. I was nervous as all hell. Not just because I needed to make a good impression and assure EverSoft that I had a really good understanding of the message they wanted to convey to the marketplace, but because Edward Cullen was going to be there.

Edward. Ugh, just _thinking_ his name started a weird, ticklish sensation in the pit of my stomach, sort of a cross between the sensation you got when going up a steep, bumpy rollercoaster, and the feeling you got when you'd had one too many plastic cups of spiked fruit punch at your senior prom. Funny how both feelings ended in the same result, wanting to puke your brains out.

Ever since that embarrassing incident at his sister's house last week, when his -quote- on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali -close quotes- had stopped just short of peeing on him to stake her claim, I'd made even more of an effort to stay away from Edward Cullen.

Not because I was scared of _Ms._ Denali. Pfft, I snorted to myself at just the thought. I was no fighter, but having been raised by a man most of my adult life, and a police chief at that, had taught me how to defend myself, physically at least. I could take that bitch. She was tall, yes. She probably had a good five to six inches on me. But I got the feeling she hadn't hung around with a bunch of rowdy, teenage Quileute boys most of her life, the way I had. And when your best friend was a hulking six foot seven giant who'd made it his mission for the last few weeks before you moved to the big city to teach you how to defend yourself against 'assholes who'll think you're easy just 'cause you're from a small town,' well, somehow a five foot ten strawberry blonde didn't seem like too much work to take down.

Whatever. I had no plans to take the bitch down anyway. I had no plans, in fact, to get anywhere near her or her little boy toy. I cringed again, remembering how stupid I'd acted last week at Alice's, when Edward had first come out on the balcony. I blamed the glass of red wine. It was the first time I'd had any alcohol in my system since…well, since the afore-mentioned spiked fruit punch incident.

And it wasn't hard to see why. It'd just been a couple of sips; it'd felt nice to feel more like a grown-up for a little while. It'd been so long since I'd been to any sort of party, so I'd decided to dress the part, put on a little bit of lipstick, and then what the heck, had a little bit of wine when Alice offered it to me. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid. No sooner had I started feeling relaxed than who should step out onto the balcony? None other than Edward Freakin' Cullen.

Apparently, two sips of wine had been enough to hear the hallelujah choirs singing as soon as I laid eyes on Edward; enough to make me forget what he'd been doing the first time I'd met him, as well as everything else I'd heard and read about him. Two sips of wine was all it took to turn me into a gaping, fawning idiot, just like the ones in today's Page Six article.

'_But he'd seemed so different,_' I thought to myself for the millionth time since that night. When he'd walked out on the balcony, dressed casually in dark slacks and a white striped short sleeved shirt, well, my already fuzzy brain had gotten even fuzzier. God, you'd think I'd never seen a man's biceps before. But the thing is, it wasn't even that. I mean, not that he didn't have the sexiest arms I'd ever seen; those puppies were practically straining at the leash under his short sleeves. Lord Almighty, I would've never guessed what lay under those perfectly starched white business shirts.

But it was more than just that; it was his face…no…his _eyes_ more than anything that had made him seem so different from the first time I'd seen him. I hadn't really allowed myself to look at him that closely for the past couple of weeks; he and I seemed to have an unspoken agreement about avoiding each other. But that night at Alice's he'd looked so…innocent. Innocent and sweet and fresh and beautiful and smart and genuinely thrilled to see me. God-damned wine.

Apparently, two sips of wine was all it took to loosen me up and make me forget about our mutual avoidance agreement, and to get me talking about private things like Forks, and Maddie; things I had no business talking about with a stranger. A cocky man-whore stranger.

It was a blessing really, I kept trying to tell myself, as well as a cold splash of water to the face, when his crazy -quote- on-again off-again girlfriend -close quotes- Tanya Denali walked out onto the balcony, reminding me that the man I was giggling away with like a school girl with was Edward Cullen, man-whore extraordinaire. He was also technically my boss, and his name appeared on my paycheck, a check Maddie and I depended on to get by.

Ugh! What _had_ I been thinking? I cringed again in my little office-cube. Only God knows how much _more_ of a fool I would've made of myself if Edward had arrived after I'd downed the _whole_ glass of wine. I'd probably be a not-so-proud member of the not-so-exclusive 'I did Edward Cullen' Club right now. An image of Edward and me rolling around naked in my bed flashed through my mind involuntarily. I squeezed my eyes shut tight, trying desperately to dispel the image and waiting for the wave of disgust to hit me. Unfortunately, all I felt was that weird, ticklish sensation deep in the pit of my stomach again. "Please God, let that be a wave of nausea coming on now" I prayed quietly, because it sure as hell didn't feel like disgust, and I _needed_ to be disgusted. "Please God. Please, please, please…"

"I hope you're praying that everything goes well at the client meeting, and I hope you're a good, God-fearing Christian woman and that God likes to answer your prayers, because you're out of time. Let's go." Rosalie stood at the entrance to my cubicle, looking as beautiful and confident as always, and with an amused grin on her face.

James and Lauren were with her; they'd be joining us this morning also. James gave me a wide grin, while Lauren stood off to the side, smirking. She and I had pretty much failed to hit it off after I'd started working here; I assumed the fact that I knew she was a hooch –as Jake would say- had something to do with her standoffish attitude towards me. Whatever, I didn't care. Unlike her, I was here for one thing and one thing only…to get my job done. And also unlike her, _not_ the kind of job where I needed a quick hand and a weak gag reflex.

Ignoring Lauren and her smirk, I smiled back weakly at Rosalie and James. "Yes Rose. Let's go." I stood up, gathering my laptop and prints. We all followed Rosalie quietly through the halls, towards the elevators that would take us to the main conference room one floor above, where the heads of EverSoft would be meeting with us, as well as Jasper, Emmett and of course, Edward.

My nerves grew as we exited the elevators on to the twenty-third floor. Rosalie, who'd been walking ahead, turned around to look at us, pursing her lips as she caught sight of me.

"James, Lauren, I need to speak to Bella. Wait for us in the conference room," she ordered.

Once they were out of earshot, Rosalie turned to me. "What is it Bella? You look like you're either going to pass out or puke on me any second. And if it's the latter please keep in mind that I just took this suit out of the cleaners. So just make sure you turn your head towards Lauren if you plan on tossing your cookies."

I chuckled weakly. "I'm just kind of nervous."

Rosalie frowned and crossed her arms, glaring at me. She uncrossed her arms and put one hand encouragingly on my forearm. Her voice was low and firm. "Listen to me Bella, EverSoft is one of our biggest clients. I worked hard at getting this account, and we all work really hard at keeping them happy."

Aah…there was the nausea I'd been praying for before.

Watching my face, Rosalie rolled her eyes. "What I'm trying to say is that if I didn't think you were ready for this, I wouldn't have asked you to join us. I wouldn't jeopardize this account on a red-faced, small-town hick who didn't know what she was doing" - she leaned in closer to whisper – "just because she happened to be me and my family's new brunch buddy." She moved back and winked at me conspiratorially.

I knew in Rosalie-speak, she'd just complimented me, even though she'd also just called me a red-faced hick. I'd come to realize in the past few weeks that compliments were few and far between when it came to Rose. You had to take them in any form they came.

Taking a deep breath, I nodded and started walking towards the conference room again.

"A couple of last minute tips," she murmured as we approached the conference room, "the Cartwright brothers started the EverSoft business twenty-five years ago, and as such, they're very set in their ways. Once they find something they're happy with, they're not likely to want to change. Keep that in mind." I nodded quickly.

"And one last thing," Rosalie whispered hastily right before we walked in, turning towards me and swiftly doing up one more button on my blouse. "They're a couple of middle-aged perverts. Keep your legs crossed and your ta-tas covered."

Before I could process that last part, we were in the room, and I realized I had bigger problems than hard-headed perverted middle-aged men.

Edward was in here already, standing between Jasper and Emmett, and for all intents and purposes looking like he'd just stepped out of an ad for Armani. I mean, Jesus Lord Almighty, he was a walking advertising campaign himself. All Armani would ever have to do to get every man in this world to buy one of his suits would be to have Edward model one. It didn't even take a marketing expert to figure that one out.

Every nerve ending in my body tingled, and somewhere in the background the Hallelujah choirs started singing again as my eyes involuntarily trailed up to his face. But I forced myself to turn away before I could meet his eyes. I had a feeling that if nothing else, _that_ would be my downfall.

'_Man-whore, man-whore, man-whore'_ I repeated in my head to keep myself grounded. _'Bella, what is wrong with you?'_ I asked myself, taking a seat next to Rosalie. _'This is your physically-gifted-yet-shady boss for God's sakes! Get a grip!'_

Unfortunately, sitting next to Rosalie put me directly across from Edward, making it harder than usual to avoid his eyes. I sucked in a deep breath and looked over at Rosalie, who'd already started talking.

"…like to introduce Isabella Swan to you gentleman. She joined our agency a few weeks ago, and we've all been very impressed with her creativity as well as her dedication to delivering a superior product."

Through my peripheral vision, I could see Jasper, Emmet _and_ Edward all nodding their heads in agreement to Rosalie's words. I could feel my cheeks going red.

"You gentleman have seen much of her work already, and I'm confident that you've been extremely pleased. We've asked her to join us today, so that you may put a face to the products you've been receiving, and also to give you an opportunity to exchange thoughts and ideas with her, since she will continue to be quite involved with your account.

"Ms. Swan, it's wonderful to meet you." The younger of the Cartwright brothers, John, who appeared to be in his late forties, perhaps early fifties, stood up and walked over to me, hand out. I swiveled my chair around to shake his hand. When he took it, he wrapped it between both of his sweaty palms before letting his eyes quickly flash to my legs. I smiled tightly and removed my hand from his as soon as courteously possible. The older Cartwright brother, Mark, waited behind him, performing the same identical handshake, only his eyes roamed quickly towards my chest. Boy, Rose hadn't been kidding. These two had a serious case of Wandering Eye.

Behind me, someone cleared their throat loudly. "Gentleman, please take your seats so that we may begin." The voice, achingly familiar despite myself, sounded sharp and annoyed, as if something had upset him. I swiveled back around quickly, taking care to avert my gaze from him, and focused instead on Jasper and Emmett, on his either side. I could see Jasper watching him with slight disapproval, as if he'd also picked up the strange, sharp tone Edward had just used with the Cartwright brothers.

If there was some deliberate sharpness in Edward's tone, the brothers appeared to have missed it, jumping in swiftly and agreeably to the business at hand. The brothers turned their attention to Lauren first, the artistic lead on our current EverSoft campaign.

The campaign itself had been pretty much the same for the past couple of years; the Cartwright brothers were resistant to any sort of change, as Rosalie had confirmed right before the meeting. And while it was working just fine – sales numbers remained at a consistent level for the past couple of years, according to Gannett figures - I personally found the campaign pretty boring. I mean, Cammy the Cow was cute and all, but seriously, who associated cows with soft skin? Sure, suede was soft, but suede wasn't human skin.

I turned my attention to Emmett, who was speaking to John Cartwright now. Emmett's booming, friendly manner was in total contrast to the cold, glaring stares that, even just from the corner of my eye, I could see Edward shooting John Cartwright.

Wow. I hadn't been aware Edward had such a strong dislike for the Cartwright brothers.

Edward's cold glare was making me nervous, even just through my periphery. _What was he doing?_ Admittedly, I was the least experienced in the room, but I was pretty sure scowling at one of your biggest clients from across the table wasn't accepted business practice. I decided to turn my eyes in a different direction. Unfortunately, I happened to turn towards Lauren, who was openly ogling Edward from across the table. She held her pen between her forefinger and middle finger and halfway in her mouth, in what I could only assume was supposed to be an attempt to look sexy and tempting, based on the slutty smile plastered on her face. Nevertheless, she was obviously oblivious to the fact that, although Edward was too busy scowling at our client to notice her, Mark Cartwright was watching her surreptitiously, one eyebrow arched and a crooked smile on his face. _Ugh, gross!_

I turned to Rosalie, who was speaking now.

"…all I'm saying gentlemen, is that although the current campaign is still going smoothly, I don't think we should get too complacent. We all know how quickly the marketplace shifts. It would be wise to be proactive, rather than reactive to any changes."

Ah. Rosalie and I were on the same page on this. I hadn't realized she'd been thinking about Cammy the Cow too.

The Cartwright brothers frowned and tapped their mouths with their forefingers, not entirely convinced.

We all turned to Lauren to see what her thoughts were, since she was the artistic lead on the campaign. Unfortunately, Lauren didn't seem to have been paying too much attention, too engrossed in leering at Edward while she stuck the pen in and out of her mouth slowly. After a couple of slow seconds, she finally appeared to realize all eyes were on her. She jumped in surprise, letting the pen fall to her lap. I heard a low rumble from Rosalie at my other side.

"Um," Lauren began, trying to figure out what we'd been discussing. "I think…if it's not broken, then there's no need to fix it."

Rosalie gave an audible growl this time. Giving Lauren a sideways hard glare, she turned back to the Cartwright brothers. "How about this? Why don't you just let us brainstorm some ideas? We could present them to you in a couple of weeks. If you like them, we can prepare some more definite sketches, some copy to go with it from James." She turned to James and he nodded his agreement. She turned back to the Cartwright brothers. "If you don't like them, no harm has been done. We'll just continue with Cammy. How does that sound?"

"I don't know…" John Cartwright grumbled.

"I have an idea." I could feel my face burning red as everyone turned to face me, including Edward. Queue butterflies _and_ nauseous sensation.

"Really?" John Cartwright asked, sounding intrigued.

I bit my lip nervously. Rosalie was going to kill me if this idea sucked. I should've run it by her before opening my big mouth. But it was too late. All eyes were on me now, and I couldn't run away. I turned to face the Cartwright brothers.

"Well, Cammy is cute and all, and Gannett _has_ shown that she's a hit with little kids." The Cartwright brothers smiled agreeably. "But…most research shows that household buying power is more and more concentrated on the decisions and likes and dislikes of the teen and preteen market." Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Rosalie arching a perfectly shaped eyebrow. "Cute cows don't really register with the preteen crowd."

"Says you," Lauren murmured on my other side.

"Let her finish, Lauren," commanded a strong voice from across the table. My heart started beating loudly in my chest as it registered the source. But I couldn't let it affect me right now.

I continued. "Um, I have a four-year-old daughter. When she was first born, I remember changing her diapers and thinking to myself that there was nothing softer than a baby's bottom."

Mark Cartwright frowned, looking confused.

"Well, what if there was something that made _all_ of your skin as soft as a baby's bottom? What if EverSoft Cream was that something?"

Total and complete silence.

Well, it was too late to stop now. Might as well get fired for something good.

"The campaign could be focused on a baby's bottom, no face, nothing else to distract. Maybe the tag line could read something like, "EverSoft cream. For skin softer than a baby's bottom." At the empty stares I received, I went on. "I think it would be a real hit with the older kids. You know, different, a little fresh, a little colorful, just a tiny bit crude. Kids like crude."

I'd always heard the line, 'the silence was deafening,' but I'd never really understood it until that moment. For what felt like years, no one spoke, no one blinked. Everyone just continued staring at me, like I'd lost my mind. Just as I was about to start gathering my things and letting myself out of the building, I heard the most amazing sound. It was a sound I'd heard a few days ago, back at Alice's loft, and I remembered thinking then that it sounded like the most melodious choir singing.

Edward laughed. Really loud.

"That…is seriously…the best idea I've heard in ages. Skin as soft as a baby's bottom," he laughed. And then, finally, I let my eyes go to his.

He was watching me, the emerald in his eyes sparkling with humor. When our eyes met, he gave me a lop-sided grin and a quick wink, making my eyes grow wide. And then all of a sudden Emmett was joining in the raucous laughter, his loud voice reverberating across the entire conference room. One by one, everyone in the room burst into fits of laughter.

"Bella, how the heck do you come up with them?" Jasper asked through his chortles. I shrugged, and he laughed harder.

John Cartwright spoke through his roars. "I love it! It's hip! It's cool! It'll make us the happening brand of the Cream market. Get working on it right away!" he demanded, rising from his chair to get ready to leave.

"We will," Rosalie assured him. "Bella, I'll need some preliminaries by the end of the day."

I nodded, completely dumbfounded by everyone's reaction and unable to say a word. I chanced a glance in Edward's direction again.

He was still staring at me, one corner of his mouth turned up in a lop-sided grin. His bright eyes gleamed with excitement and something else…pride?

And I couldn't help the huge smile that erupted out of me in return; full of gratitude, relief that I hadn't gotten myself fired after all, and…and some other emotion I couldn't quite put my finger on.

The meeting ended on a high note; everyone satisfied and excited with the direction the new campaign was headed in.

I turned to Lauren, expecting her to be as excited for the new campaign as everyone else appeared to be. She was glaring at me. I blinked twice, surprised. I thought she would've been thrilled. Rosalie was constantly reminding us that keeping the clients happy was our main goal, regardless of where the ideas came from. As she glowered at me angrily, Lauren's eyes quickly flashed to Edward. Impulsively, I stole a quick glance myself then. He was still smiling brightly at me. Surprised, I quickly looked away and turned back to Lauren. Her scowl had widened, and she stood and briskly shook hands with the Cartwright brothers before storming out. I frowned. People sure were temperamental around here.

I stood up to shake hands with the Cartwright brothers also.

"Bella, we'll be back in two weeks. I expect you'll have that idea of yours completely flushed out by then, final draft sketches and copy, distribution plans, traffic and production plans?" Mark Cartwright asked. Even though he was discussing business, his eyes still managed to wander south of mine a couple of times.

Out of nowhere, Edward materialized next to me. He put himself between me and the brothers and shoved his hand into Mark Cartwright's, forcing him to let go of mine. "_We'll_ be working on it," he responded coolly. "And her name is _Isabella_." The lightness had completely left his voice, taking on the cold, sharp tone from earlier in the meeting. "I think you gentlemen know the way out." My eyes snapped to him, surprised by his tone and what was to me, at least, his obviously dismissive remark. His jaw was strained and he stood rigidly; completely opposite to the laughing man from a few minutes ago. _What the hell? _Did he have some sort of Jekyll and Hyde complex on top of everything else?

Thankfully, the Cartwright brothers were either too dense, or too elated at having a new campaign to want to rock the boat. "Er, okay then. We'll see you all soon. Thank you for everything."

Emmett walked over to us quickly, shooting Edward a hard glare. "Thank you for coming," Emmett said, shaking hands with the brothers.

Rosalie signaled for me to walk with her. I drew in a deep breath and took one long look around the room. My eyes automatically found Edward, who stood off in a corner with Emmett and Jasper now; Jasper appeared to be reading him the riot act as quietly as possible while Edward, looking down, nodded stoically. His eyes suddenly shot up, locking on mine and causing my stomach to do that weird tightening thing again. And although I could see Jasper still motioning angrily to him, Edward's mouth turned up on one side and he raised his eyebrows and shrugged at me, as if saying _'Oh well.'_

Confused by the record number of times our eyes had met in the past hour - considering the fact that we hadn't seen each other in days and that I thought we were supposed to be following our unspoken agreement to avoid each other – I had no idea how to respond to him. So I shot him a blank stare in return before turning back around and following after Rosalie.

She was waiting for me by the elevators. "I've got a few things I need to take care of. Why don't you meet me in my office in half an hour so we can flush out this baby's ass idea a bit more?"

"Of course," I agreed, sighing quietly in relief that she hadn't tore into me for not speaking to her first about my idea.

The doors to the elevator opened up and we got in, pressing the twenty-second floor button.

"And by the way," she continued, once we were in motion, "the next time you take me by surprise like that in front of one of our biggest clients, I'm going to tear you a new hole bigger than the one I'm about to tear Lauren."

I nodded dumbly. The elevator doors opened up and she stepped out ahead of me.

"Good job, by the way," she called out as an afterthought, walking away without a backwards glance.

"Thanks," I mumbled to her back. As incredible as it was to believe, in the past few weeks, Rosalie and I had actually become friends outside of the office, thanks to our mutual friendship with Alice, and now Esme. But I knew that friendship took a backseat once we were in the office, which made me respect Rosalie all the more. Because I knew where I stood with Rosalie; I knew I'd earned whatever praise or criticism I received from her and that it had nothing to do with how we interacted out of the office. I tried to remember that as I walked back to my cube after being threatened with a new hole.

When I reached my cube, I threw myself on my chair, twisting it around towards my desk and resting my head in my hands. The morning had been mentally draining, and Edward's strange behavior had made it even more so. What was with the bipolar act? And what the heck happened to our unspoken agreement to avoid each other? What happened to change _that_? My eyes landed on the newspaper I'd been secretly looking at this morning, still open to the 'Page Six' headlines.

"_He can sweat all over me any time."_

"_Wonder what long time on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali…"_

I thought back to the way Tanya Denali had hung all over Edward back at Alice's party, and the way Lauren had been sucking on that pen during the meeting, leering at Edward like she wanted to be sucking on something else. Like maybe she'd _already_ sucked on _his_ something else.

Ugh! I couldn't think about it anymore, I didn't _want_ to think about it anymore. I needed something to clear my mind, something to relax me. Rose wasn't expecting me for another twenty-five minutes. That gave me plenty of time to run down to the Starbucks on the corner for a soothing cup of hot chocolate.

_Mmmm._ Chocolate.

I grabbed my purse from the bottom cabinet and quickly walked out of my cubicle, towards the elevators.

The line at Starbucks was long; apparently mid-morning was a popular time for city people to reload with some caffeine. While I waited my turn to order, I thought of my Maddie. I wished she were here with me now; she and I both loved hot chocolate, regardless of the weather outside. I wondered what she was up to at that moment. I smiled; knowing Sue, she was probably off at the park or the zoo.

I glanced at my watch. I'd been in line for ten minutes, and there were still two people in front of me. I sighed impatiently.

My mind went back to Maddie, remembering the large mug of hot chocolate with mounds and mounds of whipped cream Esme Cullen ordered for her at brunch last Sunday, when she'd found out how fond Maddie was of that particular drink. We'd had a really great time at the café Alice had picked out, a few blocks from her loft, with outdoor seating right by the Hudson River.

It'd been curious to watch how quickly Maddie had taken to the Cullen women, and vice versa. Esme especially had fawned all over her, and for a split second I'd felt a pang of sadness as I'd watched Maddie giggling with her so easily. Esme, although a wonderfully warm person who I'd immediately taken a strong liking to, was no relation to Maddie. Yet in one afternoon, she'd treated Maddie with more warmth and tenderness than either one of her grandmothers ever had. Although Esme had no grandchildren herself yet, she seemed so comfortable around Maddie, playing patty cake with her, and running her fingers affectionately through Maddie's long, dark hair. Around the Cullen women, Maddie was nothing like the shy, introverted little girl she'd been when we'd arrived in this city. And then when she'd met Edward…

I was interrupted out of my thoughts by the young female Barista, who glared at me impatiently. "Excuse me Ms., are you ready to order or what? 'Cause we've got a long line behind you."

"Oh, yes. Sorry. Uh, can I please have a tall hot chocolate, no whip cream, with skim please?" I placed my order as quickly as possible, hearing anxious grumbling coming from the woman behind me. Jeez, people in this city were always in such a rush.

The young barista silently rang up my order without sparing me another glance. "That'll be $3.87," she confirmed in a bored voice.

I quickly opened up my purse to pull out my wallet, digging through tons of papers, wayward crayons, barrettes and little plastic rings. An impatient teeth sucking sound rang out behind me, increasing my anxiety and making me dig deeper. My face started to get hot. But no matter how much I dug around, I couldn't find my wallet. "Shit!" I gritted silently through my teeth, remembering now that I'd taken my wallet out of my purse this morning to contribute five dollars towards the birthday cake for Sally, one of the secretaries in the office. Apparently, I'd forgotten to put it back in my purse. _Shit!_

"Come on lady, either pay for your stuff or get off the line so the rest of us can order," someone grumbled from behind me. I glanced up quickly at the young Barista, who was rolling her eyes in frustration at having to wait for me. As if she'd be anywhere else but here right now whether I had my money or not.

Just as I was about to tell her to cancel my order, I heard another voice from behind me, although this one was much kinder than the others, and as smooth as velvet. "Julie, I've got it. As well as anything else she orders."

I swallowed hard before turning around. There stood Edward, watching me with amusement in his eyes. He walked slowly towards the front of the line, coming to stand next to me.

I shook my head quickly, feeling that weird sensation in the pit of my stomach. "You don't have to do that. I'll just come back down later."

"Don't be ridiculous Bella," he responded, with a smile on his lips. "Get your coffee." He turned towards the counter, his eyes scanning the window display full of cookies and brownies and all the indulgent snacks I'd just been eyeing. "Pastry?" he asked, jerking his head towards the display.

I stared at him, quickly shaking my head. "Really Edward," I insisted. "I can't let you-"

He cut me off. "Of course you can, and you will."

We heard another loud, irritated sigh from behind Edward. He chuckled. "Come on, you're holding up the line. People get very impatient around here when you keep them from their coffee." He turned his attention to the Barista, who'd magically transformed into a completely different person in the last few seconds.

"Your usual Mr. Cullen?" she asked sweetly.

"Yes, please." He pointed towards a sinfully-rich-looking confection in the display. "And I'll take that brownie there too." He turned back towards me, another crooked grin gracing his face when he caught me watching the young girl remove the yummy brownie from the display. "Sure you don't want one?"

And although the brownie looked good as all hell, I was having a hard enough time letting him pay for my hot chocolate. There was no way I was adding dessert to that list. I shook my head again.

He shrugged. "Suit yourself."

He pulled his wallet out from his back pocket and handed the young girl a twenty. All smiles now, she took it from him eagerly. I didn't miss how she let her hand linger over his for just a split second longer than necessary while she handed him his change.

"Here you go Mr. Cullen. Have a wonderful day!" she gushed, gazing at him longingly.

"Thanks Julie. You too," he responded in a friendly tone, avoiding her gaze. "Shall we?" he asked, walking with me to the side to wait for our drinks.

Finally off the line, I forced myself to look up at him. My stomach contracted even more when I looked into his undeniably rich, green eyes. "Uh, thanks Edward. But I can't let you pay for my hot chocolate. I'll pay you back as soon as I get upstairs."

He rolled his eyes. "Will you please stop? It was just a cup of…what? Hot chocolate? Not even coffee? I'm not going to take your money for that. Esme would skin me alive if she ever found out. And you didn't even get a snack." He broke off a piece of his brownie and stuck it in his mouth, moaning quietly as he savored it. "Mmmm." My eyes widened. The sight of Edward Cullen enjoying the chewiest looking brownie I'd ever laid eyes on was just too much temptation for one person to handle. I forced myself to look away.

The young man behind the counter signaled, and we approached the counter again to pick up our drinks. Before reaching out for my drink, I turned back to Edward. "I'm serious. I can't accept it unless you agree to let me pay you back."

Edward pursed his lips in disapproval, breathing in deeply. He glared at me like I was being a seriously difficult child. Suddenly he smiled again, as if something had just occurred to him. "Alright then, you may pay me back. What's a good time for me to stop by your cube to collect my money?" His eyes twinkled with amusement.

"I'll…let you know."

He chuckled. "Fair enough." He turned back to the young man and reached out to pick up both drinks from him.

"Here you go Mr. Cullen. I put four sugars in, just like you like it," the young man offered eagerly. He gazed at Edward with a little more enthusiasm than entirely necessary when handing over the over-priced drinks, and, like the girl at the register, it took him a split second longer than necessary to let go as Edward took them from his hands. With his eyes intently on our drinks, Edward thanked him.

"Thanks Jim."

"You're _very_ welcome Mr. Cullen," he gushed. "_Anytime."_

Oh brother. I rolled my eyes. Apparently this obsession with Edward Cullen crossed all gender lines.

Edward handed me my hot chocolate, and we walked out of Starbucks.

"So what's with the hot chocolate?" he asked, as we headed back towards the office. "Are you cold? It's like eighty degrees today."

"No, I'm not cold." I answered. "I needed something to calm my nerves after that meeting, and hot chocolate just works better for me." I glanced quickly at his cup of coffee. "And coffee is just as hot."

"Yes, it is," he agreed with a grin. "But it's a much more socially acceptable drink, especially since its still technically summer. Who drinks hot chocolate in the summer? Around here at least, we leave our hot chocolate for the cold weather months. I mean, I don't know how they do things in Forks…" he teased. "Tell me, apart from being known as the rainiest place in the continental U.S., is it also like, the hot chocolate capital of the country or something?" I smirked at him. I knew he was totally teasing me just to be a smartass, but part of me couldn't help feeling pleased that he'd remembered what I'd told him about Forks.

Well, if he could be a smartass, so could I.

"Well, you see, the problem with your assumption there is that you assume that we in Forks concern ourselves with what you East Coasters deem socially acceptable behavior." He chuckled. "But nevertheless, to answer your question, no. Forks is not the hot chocolate capital of the country. While we may not be as sophisticated as you big city folk are here, we're not complete social misfits. Most people there do tend to prefer coffee. Hot chocolate just happens to be me and my daughter's thing. I apologize if you find that weird."

He snorted. "No, I don't find either of you weird." He turned to smile at me, raising an eyebrow. "Intriguing maybe, but definitely not weird." I didn't respond to that. We were quiet again while we waited for our elevator. "So Maddie's a big hot chocolate fan too?" he asked curiously. Again, I was surprised by how easily and comfortably he spoke of topics I still felt pretty private about; even possessive of.

But even more surprising was the way I kept answering him. With detailed answers instead of short, direct ones. "Well, it's not something I let her indulge in every day, considering the fact that she's only four and I don't want her bouncing off the walls every night. But yes, she loves her hot chocolate. We're both big fans of chocolate."

"Really?" he mused, bobbing his head up and down slowly, as if he were considering this bit of information intently. I bit my lip, wondering why I seemed to have a need to elaborate on my answers with him, and why he kept acting like he cared.

When the elevator arrived, he put a hand out to hold it open for me while I walked in. The doors closed and I realized we were the only two in the elevator. He broke off another piece of brownie and placed it in his mouth. "Mmm, mmm, mmm. I don't know how they make these so soft and chewy." I watched him, unable to make myself look away this time. He met my gaze, raising an eyebrow when he caught me staring. "Are you sure you don't want a piece?" he offered again once he'd swallowed.

I had to press my lips together tightly for a second to prevent myself from saying yes. His lips twitched. "No thanks," I lied, shaking my head.

He raised both eyebrows and shrugged again, as if saying, 'your loss.' "Well, next time I see Maddie, I'll buy her a nice warm cup of hot chocolate _and_ a big brownie. Maybe _she'll_ accept them gracefully, without putting up a big fight." And there he went again, talking about my daughter as if they were old friends. "Is she allowed to have brownies?" He voice sound almost hopeful.

I studied him carefully, wondering about this strange curiosity he seemed to have with my daughter. And even stranger was the fact that she seemed to have an equally strange fascination with him. Ever since she'd met him that day in the office, she hadn't stopped talking about him. You'd think they were old friends, rather than someone she'd only met once, and for a short while. She'd even brought him up a few times during our brunch with his family, much to my embarrassment. I didn't want them to think I went around talking to her about him.

"Yes, she's allowed to have brownies occasionally," I answered. "But your mom and Alice already indulged her this weekend with enough. I'm afraid she's banned from sweets for a while."

He raised an eyebrow again. "Oh, that's right, Alice and her Sunday brunches." He pursed his lips and snorted. His expression made me wonder if I was missing something.

"Well, then. Maybe I'll get her some rice cakes and carrots instead," he joked. "Does that sound healthier?"

For a split second, I debated telling him that he shouldn't be worrying about what snacks to buy my daughter, that maybe he should give Tanya Denali or one of his other girlfriends a call and ask them what sort of snacks _they_ were in the mood for.

I stopped myself before the words could spill out. Where had that thought come from? That would've been extremely rude. Not to mention more than just a little spiteful. A small part of me wondered why the thought of him with Tanya, or Lauren, or hell, even the Baristas across the street at Starbucks now, female _and_ male, aggravated me so much.

"Yes, I supposed that's healthier." _'Stick to short answers Bella'_ I told myself. There was no reason for me to hold a conversation with Edward that wasn't related to work. Besides, what were the chances he'd see Maddie again, or that he'd ever color with her as he'd promised her a couple of weeks ago, or buy her a hot chocolate and brownie for that matter?

Edward smiled widely at my answer, as if he were pleased with something. We were silent again for a couple of seconds. "That was a great idea up there, by the way." He jerked his head up, signaling towards the conference room above us. I looked down, feeling slightly embarrassed. "I was really proud of you."

My eyes shot up to him quickly. His words shouldn't have surprised me. Of course he'd be proud that I'd made the agency look good. But the words had sounded so…honest…so…intense.

Thankfully, the elevator reached my floor. As the doors opened, I smiled carefully at him. "Thanks Edward," I murmured, and walked out before he could say anything in return.

"Your welcome Bella," he called out behind me in a voice so low I wasn't sure I'd been meant to hear it. As the doors closed, he called out more loudly, "Call me when you're ready to pay up." I froze for one second, before realizing he'd been referring to the money I owed him for the hot chocolate.

That night, after getting Maddie in bed, I curled up on the couch to read for a little while. My mind was too wound up from the day's events to sleep. Between the meeting with the Cartwright brothers and my strange encounter with Edward, I couldn't focus on one word. When I looked up at the clock, I realized I'd been sitting here for half an hour without turning the page once. I kept reading the same paragraph over and over and still had no clue what the book was about.

Just as I was about to give up on the book and pull out my laptop to get some work done instead, the phone rang. I sprang up quickly to get it before it could wake Maddie. I grinned to myself as I caught sight of the name on the Caller ID.

"Hey," I smiled into the phone.

"Hey yourself," Jake answered. "Am I calling too late?" His voice was a low whisper, as if his speaking loudly over the phone would wake Maddie up. Even one month later, Jake was still having trouble remembering the time difference between Washington and New York.

I laughed quietly. "Well, if you wanted to speak to Maddie, she's asleep already."

"Damn! But it's only 8:30 here," Jake complained.

"Jake, its three hours later here, not earlier," I reminded him with a laugh.

"Oh, damn!" he said again. "I keep getting mixed up."

I chuckled.

"So why the hell are you still up?" he asked.

"I couldn't sleep. Too wound up." I answered honestly.

"What's got you wound up?"

"Oh," I breathed into the phone, "just stuff at work." I explained vaguely. I could never tell Jake the truth about what, or rather who, my mind was on. We just weren't in that place yet, although I hoped with the distance I'd put between us, we would be some day. But I was sure that, if I told Jake right now that some guy had me all tied up in knots inside, and that that guy happened to be none other than my world-famous employer Edward Cullen, he'd be on the next plane out to New York boxing up my stuff and moving me back to Forks faster than I could say '_New York Minute,'_ especially since he'd been completely against my moving to New York in the first place.

"What is it? Are they working you too hard? You know there's no shame in coming back if it's not working out Bella." He continued quickly without pausing to let me get a word in edgewise. "Your job is still here, waiting for you. Sue Clearwater misses Maddie like crazy. Your dad misses the both of you like crazy." Now he paused. "_I_ miss you both like crazy."

I closed my eyes, feeling the tears stinging at the corners. "We miss you guys too Jake, but everything's fine here." I tried to make my voice sound light. As much as I loved talking to Jake every couple of days, it also killed me. Because his voice brought back all the longing for Forks, for my dad. I did miss them all terribly, but I couldn't go back, for their own good, as well as for mine and Maddie's.

"Bella, _he's _been gone for over a year now, I don't think _he's_ ever coming back." Jake continued, his tone hopeful that this would be enough to convince me this time. Even though we went through the same conversation almost every time he called.

"Jake, you know that's not the problem. If his leaving would've taken it all away with him…" I trailed off, "but it didn't. With or without him there, the mess I made was affecting Maddie. And it was affecting you and my dad too. I couldn't let that continue. I didn't care what everyone thought of me, or how they looked at me, you know that. But I couldn't let them keep looking at Maddie…or at you like that."

"First of all Bella, you gotta stop blaming yourself for what happened. You didn't make that mess, _he_ did. You had no other choice but to handle things the way you saw best for you and Maddie." All this time later, I still wasn't completely convinced of that, but I knew there was no arguing it with Jake, so I just let him continue without interrupting. "Second of all, I'm a big boy Bells. They could say and think whatever they wanted. I didn't care. All I cared about was being there for you and Maddie."

I drew in a deep breath, letting it out slowly before answering him. "I know you didn't care what they said or thought Jake. That was part of the reason I had to leave."

Jake was quiet for a while. "So I guess that means absence hasn't made your heart grow fonder of me then, huh?" he tried to joke, but I could hear the hurt in his voice.

"Jake, you know I love you. Just…"

"Just not that way," he finished for me. I didn't say anything for a few moments. I didn't know what to say. I knew Jake still hoped that someday my feelings for him would morph into something different, something more. But I knew that would never happen. And it had gotten too hard watching him drive everyone away to protect me. It wasn't fair to him. It was one of the reasons I'd left.

"So how's Maddie doing with the sitter?" I sighed in relief, grateful for the subject change. Jake was my best friend; he had been for years. But ever since the divorce, I knew he'd hoped something more would develop between us. It'd made our interactions so much more strained. I longed for the days when we'd just been two carefree friends and I hoped that somehow, this separation would bring those days back.

"She's doing really well Jake," I responded enthusiastically, trying to bring back some levity into the conversation. "She's really very happy with her. You should see Maddie," I laughed, "she's all smiles now, and the nightmares are all gone. She sleeps with your Dream Catcher every night." I could practically feel him grinning proudly through the phone.

"Well, I'm glad she's doing better." Jake had been as concerned as my dad and me about Maddie's initial reaction to our move. "Even though I guess that means it'll be even harder to convince you to move back." I groaned and he laughed.

"So when are we going to see you? You're still planning on coming back over Thanksgiving right?" His voice was wary. He asked me the same question every time we spoke, as if afraid I'd change my mind.

"Of course Jake, where else would I spend Thanksgiving?" I pictured my dad trying to prepare a Thanksgiving meal on his own. I could see it now; he'd pull the oven open only to reveal a Turkey so burnt and dry it looked like an old piece of leather. Maybe like a crispy version of Cammy the Cow. I could never leave my dad to that; he'd spent so many years alone after my mom divorced him and moved us to Phoenix. When I'd finally returned to him and seen what passed for a meal in his bachelor's home, I'd been surprised he hadn't actually died of starvation. Besides, where else would I spend Thanksgiving? Here? With who? Alice and I had become good friends over the last few weeks, but she had her own family.

Involuntarily, my mind went to Edward. I wondered how he spent his Thanksgivings, with his family, in their house on Long Island, or with Tanya Denali or one of his other girlfriends?

I shook my head to clear it and focus on my conversation with Jake again. "How's Charlie doing?" I asked.

Although I spoke to Jake almost every other day, my phone calls with my dad weren't as often. Not because I didn't miss him as much, and I was sure he missed Maddie and me as much as we did him, but Charlie had never been the most talkative man. Most of our phone calls were punctuated with long moments of silence and awkwardness. So to avoid those moments as much as possible, we kept our phone calls to once a week, giving us more to talk about when we did.

"He's doing well." Jake confirmed. "You know how Forks is; he doesn't do much more than stop the occasional speeder and hand out a traffic ticket now and then, but Billy tries to keep him busy. They spend a lot of time watching their games, and they still go fishing every weekend. And I've heard Sue stops by every few days and brings him some dinner and stuff."

I sighed again, relieved. I'd felt so guilty about leaving my dad alone again, after so many years. But it'd gotten to the point where I could see what the strain of dealing with the gossip was doing to him. My usually quiet and reserved father had gotten into more than one argument defending me, and I'd been afraid it would take a toll on his health, as well as his job. Leaving had definitely been the right decision.

"And how's business at the garage?" I asked.

"Well, you know, can't complain." I knew Jake wouldn't brag about it, but he was the best mechanic within one hundred miles of Forks. His garage was usually pretty busy. It was where I'd worked until I'd moved to New York. It was where I'd met _him_…

"Leah's driving me crazy though." I chuckled, picturing it. Leah Clearwater, Sue Clearwater's daughter, had taken over my job when I'd moved. Although she was Jake's friend, and mine too, Leah had a very…abrasive personality. She was difficult to warm up to, to say the least. "No one could run that office the way you could Bells. And that website! It's a mess, Leah has no idea how to work it."

I laughed. "Look I can take a look at it for you from my laptop and make any adjustments that are needed."

"Yeah, but how 'bout all those cool posters and promotions you used to come up with? No one here can do that! Come on Bells, I need you!" he moaned.

"You don't need me," I joked, "you need a local marketing group to run your advertising and promotions."

"That's not true Bells." Jake's voice was serious again. "I need _you_."

My heart sank. Would we ever get past this? "Jake, someday you're going to meet somebody, and she's going to blow your mind. And you're going to wonder why you ever wasted so much time-"

"How 'bout you Bells?" he interrupted me. "Have you met anyone yet? Is there someone in the big city that's blown _your_ mind?

And before he'd even finished his sentence, my thoughts turned to Edward again, picturing him today; his crooked smile as he shoved a piece of chocolate brownie in his mouth; knowing exactly how he was tempting me with all its chocolaty goodness and…and maybe with more…

_No!_ I thought to myself, shaking my head as if Jake could read my thoughts over the phone. I could imagine what he'd say if he could read my thoughts. It was the same thing I told myself now. _Don't be stupid Bella! Don't even think of him that way! You didn't leave Forks to end up with the same kind of problem in New York!_ I knew the game Edward played. It was the same sort of game _he'd_ played; the game remained the same, only the player and the playground were different.

"I didn't come here to meet someone Jake. I came to make a better life for Maddie and me, and to give you a chance to make a life for yourself."

I heard Jake let out a sigh of relief on his end, and I closed my eyes, wishing he wouldn't still hold out hope for something that would never be.

"So what are you doing for your birthday next week?"

I laughed weakly this time. "Nothing! I haven't told anyone about it. Not even my friend Alice I was telling you about."

Jake chuckled. "I can't believe you. I've never met anyone who hates celebrating her birthday as much as you. Usually women don't start ignoring their birthdays until they're twenty-nine or something. You've still got three years for that."

We laughed together.

"You should at least treat yourself to a nice dinner out with Maddie or something."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, she _has_ been wanting to take a ferry ride across the river to this area called The Seaport. It's supposed to have little shops and restaurants and stuff. Maybe we'll go there," I said thoughtfully.

"Atta girl," Jake encouraged. We spoke for another five minutes or so before hanging up on a lighter note than we'd started. Exhausted by the day and the time, I finally went to bed.

The next day at work, I put four single dollar bills in an inter-office envelope and addressed it to Edward Cullen, Executive, Traffic and Production, and signed it Isabella Swan, Graphic. Inside the envelope with the four dollars, I placed a note that simply read 'Thank you,' and put it in the outbox, to be collected and delivered.

My phone call with Jake the night before had served to clear my mind and remind me of things that I'd apparently begun to forget. I wasn't a stupid teenaged girl anymore. I could feel my attraction to Edward, and I had a feeling he felt some sort of attraction to me. But I would never let that happen. I had no desire to become one of Edward Cullen's groupies. I had Maddie to think of now, and I couldn't afford to play the games men like Edward Cullen played.

That afternoon, while I was working on our proposal for the Cartwright brothers, a new message popped on my iNotes screen. I clicked over to my inbox to see what it was.

Who: Edward Cullen.

Subject: Hot Chocolate.

Ms. Swan:

Thank you for compensating me for the cup of hot chocolate I purchased for you yesterday. As I was sitting at my desk this morning, a loan shark I usually do business with walked into my office, uninvited, and threatened to break every bone in my body unless I immediately paid him the two-hundred dollars I've owed him for the past six months. Well, you can imagine my horror when I opened my wallet and all I had was one-hundred and ninety-six dollars.

Luckily for me, just at that moment, I spotted your inter-office mail and opened it quickly, hoping against hope that you'd decided to pay me back for the cup of hot chocolate I'd so begrudgingly purchased for you. The relief that washed over my body as I opened up the envelope and found those heavenly four dollar bills was unimaginable, and I am slightly ashamed to admit that, I may have soiled my pants.

So thank you once again, Ms. Swan. I don't know what I would've done had you not returned those four dollars to me so swiftly. I owe you my life (or my legs, at the very least), and I fully intend to repay you somehow.

How about some hot chocolate (**and** a brownie)?

Sincerely,

Edward A. Cullen

Executive

Cullen, Cullen and Whitlock Advertising

Traffic and Production

(212) 555-8168

Sitting at my desk, I laughed so hard I think I may have soiled _my _pants.

God-damned smartass.

**Reviews are as sweet as **_**Ad-ward's**_** sweet tooth. Feed into his sugar addiction.**

**Edward **_**and**_** Maddie are back for the next chapter. I know a lot of you have missed their interactions! **


	6. InterludeEmail Chain

_**Because I've broken my foot, and apparently have too much time on my hands right now…**_

_**Okay guys, this isn't exactly the next chapter. I'm working on that also. This is more like an Interlude, I like to call it; an in-between of sorts. An email conversation between E and B. It's not necessarily in anyone's POV; it's just a record of their email conversations.**_

_**Keep in mind, when you get an email chain that started a few days ago, the oldest messages are on the bottom, the latest ones on top. Remember that as you read this. If it gets a bit confusing, you may want to try scrolling down to the beginning of the email chain, and then reading your way up. Sorry if it's confusing, but I just felt like doing it this way! Thought it added something to it. I'm sure you'll all let me know if I'm wrong.**_

_**This has NOT been Beta'd. Sorry Danna honey; I just wanted to send this out right away so I can send out a real chappy later this week. Don't hate me and don't abandon me, please, please, please!**_

_**And please forgive any formatting errors or confusion. This crap was driving me crazy. Fanfiction is a pain in the 'baby's bottom' sometimes!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

**Interlude – Email Chain**

(Email Chain between Edward and Bella: Remember, oldest emails are on the bottom, latest on top)!

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
****Monday, September 12, 2010 4:51 pm  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan **

**Good afternoon Bella,**

**First off all, I have to say that no, I am absolutely not exaggerating. It **_**is**_** that big. I'm talking bigger than your standard eight inches or so. Mine is at least eleven inches long. I'm willing to show you mine if you show me yours. **

**Second, I'm so sorry to be getting back to you so late, but my Monday turned out to be extremely hectic. Crystal Clear Organics moved up some of the deadlines for their prints, and Rose and I spent most of the day scrambling to rearrange priorities. Rose must've still been playing that "I'm tired" card, because she was sure moving slower than I've ever seen her move. But we managed to get it all squared away pretty well.**

**Third, I'm really glad you had a good time with the girls this weekend. Brunch sounds like it was fun. Alice keeps her little Sunday brunches 'by invitation only', and I haven't gotten an invite for the past couple of weeks. I did something that ticked her off a couple of weeks ago and she's punishing me by keeping me away from poached eggs and Canadian bacon. I'll have to try to get back into her good graces; sounds like I'm missing out. Maybe then I'll get a chance to buy you your hot chocolate and brownie. And little Maddie too.**

**I really wish I could write more, but I have to get going. That thing I like to watch starts in less than ten minutes, and I've got to get downstairs before I miss it. You and Maddie have a safe night.**

**Sincerely,**

**Edward A. Cullen  
****Executive  
****Traffic and Production  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-8168**

**P.S. – I'm glad you like my new closing.**

* * *

**Isabella Swan  
****Monday, September 12, 2010 10:07 am  
****Subject: Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Edward Cullen**

**Good morning Edward. Sorry I didn't get back to you on your previous email, but I didn't see it until this morning.**

**Maddie and I had a very good weekend, thank you. We ran some errands on Saturday and we spent most of Sunday morning and early afternoon with Alice, Rose and Esme. Maddie is really taken with them, and Rose and your mom stayed with her for a couple of hours at Alice's while Alice took me on a shopping trip from hell. Remind me never to go pick up "a few things" with your sister. I guess Rosalie knew what she was doing when she bowed out by claiming to be "tired."**

**Dartmouth. Hmm. That's a bit of a long story, but basically it just comes down to the old poem about 'two roads diverged in a wood.' The one I took has definitely made all the difference in my life, and no matter what, I'd take that same road all over again if it led me to the same little princess.**

**Speaking of Dartmouth, their diplomas can't be any bigger than the one I received from U. of Washington on your basic 8 1/2" x 11" paper. I think you're exaggerating.**

**As for the hot chocolate and brownie, thanks, but I'll just take Emmett's word for it. Rosalie's waiting for some sketches for Wheat-A-Bits. **

**Sincerely, **

**Isabella Swan  
****Graphic Artist  
****Creative/Design Department  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-4121**

**P.S. – Like I've said before, there is no right or wrong temperature for hot chocolate.**

**P.P.S. – I like your new closing. Dartmouth would be proud.**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
****Monday, September 12, 2010 9:01 am  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Good morning Bella. How did you and Maddie enjoy your weekend? Based on all the gushing my mother did last night over the phone, I'd say it's safe to say brunch was a big hit again yesterday. **

**So…How about today? It's pretty cool outside. Great day for a nice warm cup of hot chocolate. I hear tell the brownies are exceptionally chewy today (or so Emmett informed me, but since he refused to break me off a piece, I can't be sure). Only one way to find out though. What do you say?**

**Sincerely,**

**Edward A. Cullen  
****Executive  
****Traffic and Production  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-8168**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
****Friday, September 09, 2010 8:48 pm  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Bella,**

**I had a feeling you'd be sending me another one of your late emails, so I'm checking my work emails at home tonight (something I hate doing, by the way) and of course, lo and behold, there's a message from you. I'm starting to think you do it on purpose…**

**I wish you would've told me, or Rosalie would've told me she was going to be late. I would've taken over the conference call; you shouldn't have had to be on it alone (James doesn't count). I'll have to pop in on Em and Rose in a few; see what's going on with her. I can't remember her ever having gone in late to work since the day she started. I swear the woman lives for that place.**

**To set your mind at ease, you're right; there never was a loan shark. Although the Dartmouth thing is true enough. The diploma is pretty big. **

**You were accepted to Dartmouth? How come you didn't attend? That would've been interesting, meeting you in college…**

**Good night Bella. Hope you and Maddie have a fun and safe weekend.**

**Sincerely, **

**E****dward A. Cullen  
****Executive  
****Traffic and Production  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-8168**

**P.S. – I've decided to rearrange my closing. If I get ridiculed for it, there'll be hell to pay.**

* * *

**Isabella Swan  
****Friday, September 09, 2010 4:51 pm  
Subject: Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
To: Edward Cullen**

**The reason I send you emails so late in the work day is because I'm doing exactly that, working. I know; novel idea isn't it? But I don't think the owners of the company would appreciate it if they found out I was spending my days sending emails back and forth that were totally unrelated to work. :)**

**And the reason your "pitch" at selling me on a cup of hot chocolate isn't working is because, like many of the pitches in this business, it's a big fat lie. There was never any loan shark after you (or at least I hope not, for your own good). You forget what we do for a living, sell people half-truths and convince them that they desperately need something that they don't. There is a big difference between a want and a need. And while I may really, really want a cup of hot chocolate, I think I'm better off without it. **

**I'm pretty familiar with Dartmouth, having been accepted there once myself. They wouldn't take your diploma away (and besides, the diplomas are not all that big).**

**Anyway, Rosalie came in late today, said she wasn't feeling well, and Lauren was out today, so it was up to James and me to deal with John Cartwright on the conference call this morning. It was a long morning, to say the least. Hot chocolate just wasn't an option today.**

**Sincerely,**

**Isabella Swan  
****Graphic Artist  
****Creative/Design Department  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-4121**

**P.S. – You won't acknowledge any of my postscripts because you know they're all true.**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
Friday, September 09, 2010 9:03 am  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Good morning Bella. First off I'd like to ask, why do you insist on sending me emails after 4:45? As I've informed you, I have to leave the office a few minutes before five every day, but I hate thinking that there's an email out there from you that I haven't responded to.**

**And yes, I know John Cartwright wants draft drafts of the Baby Bottom Campaign. Usually we call draft drafts 'rough preliminaries,' but the Cartwright brothers are in a class of their own. (Actually, I think they're originally from Washington State or somewhere around there...) :)**

**I'm sorry most of the work seems to be falling on you, but who told you to go and have such a great idea? Seriously though, if there's anything I can help with, please let me know. Anything at all. And don't let Rosalie work you so hard. That woman forgets there's a world outside of this office sometimes…**

**You're actually making me doubt my resourcefulness, if I must be honest. In case you haven't noticed, I'm having a really hard time here convincing you to let me repay you for my life. This really wouldn't look good on my resume, considering I'm supposed to be some sort of advertising and marketing pro capable of convincing an Eskimo to purchase ice, yet I can't even get my co-worker to have a cup of hot chocolate with me. If Dartmouth could see me now, they'd take back the huge diploma they granted me six years ago. **

**Help me keep my huge diploma Bella. It looks really impressive in my office. **

**Hot chocolate?**

**Sincerely, **

**Edward A. Cullen  
Executive  
Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
Traffic and Production (212) 555-8168**

**P.S. – I'm not even going to acknowledge any of the statements in your latest postscripts.**

* * *

**Isabella Swan  
Thursday, September 08, 2010 4:48 pm  
Subject: Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
To: Edward Cullen**

**Rose and I have been busy non-stop today. I don't know if she told you, but John Cartwright called and he'd like to see some _draft_ drafts for the Baby Bottom Campaign (whatever the heck a draft draft is. Must be an East Coast thing). So we were pretty busy today sketching all sorts of baby behinds to show the Cartwright brothers and their people by next week, while James comes up with some sort of copy.**

**And thanks for the hot chocolate/coffee offer again, but really, once again, it wasn't necessary. You don't owe me anything. I'm sure you would've come up with four dollars somehow. You seem to be a resourceful man.**

**Sincerely,**

**Isabella Swan  
****Graphic Artist  
****Creative/Design Department  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-4121**

**P.S. – I'm not going to argue it with you anymore. If you insist on sending out emails with your closing all backwards, there's nothing I can do about it.**

**P.P.S – No, I wasn't upset by the brownie-snatching comment, I have tougher skin than that (although the comment itself was entirely false). And I was only staring because you had a huge piece of chocolate stuck between your teeth. **

**P.P.P.S – Now _I'm_ just kidding. You did not have chocolate stuck between your teeth (it was actually hanging from your chin).**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
Thursday, September 08, 2010 9:12 am  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie?...Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Bella,**

**Sorry I didn't respond to you yesterday, but I didn't see _your_ response until this morning. I've been leaving the office a few minutes early for the past couple of weeks. There's something on at 5:00 I don't like to miss.**

**I sincerely hope you remembered our agreement from yesterday and left your place sans hot chocolate this morning. What time is good for you? I can stop by your cube or meet you at Starbucks; which ever you prefer.**

**Sincerely,**

**Edward A. Cullen  
Executive  
Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
Traffic and Production (212) 555-8168**

**P.S. – No Bella. As much as I hate to disagree with you, you're just plain old wrong on this one. Company name, then Department.**

**P.P.S. – I really was just kidding with the brownie-snatching comment yesterday. I hope it didn't upset you.**

* * *

**Isabella Swan  
Monday, September 12, 2010 4:47 pm  
Subject: Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
To: Edward Cullen**

**No Edward. I hate to disagree with you, but the department name comes first. Everyone knows that.**

**Have a good night.**

**Sincerely, **

**Isabella Swan  
****Graphic Artist  
****Creative/Design Department  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-4121**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
Wednesday, September 07, 2010 10:06 am  
****Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie?...Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Bella,**

**You shouldn't worry about your paycheck. It's not the first time I've been threatened with bodily harm due to one reason or another, so I've left it in my will that _all _CCW employees will receive their salary in perpetuity regardless of the manner of my death. You're covered there.**

**Glad to know at least my sister would miss me if I were to go. You wouldn't know it by the number of times she's hung up on me in the past few days…**

**If today is out of the question for me to pay you back for my very life, then please keep tomorrow open. DO NOT HAVE HOT CHOCOLATE AT HOME. Somehow I don't think Swiss Miss can hold a candle to Starbucks. And don't worry about my loose change. I've learned my lesson and have now started a loose change collection can that I keep handy. It's right on my desk if you'd like to come and contribute…**

**So you caved with the brownie, huh? Can't say I'm surprised. You should've seen your face yesterday. One more second in that elevator and I do believe you would've snatched it right out of my mouth.**

**Just kidding Bella.**

**Sincerely, **

**Edward A. Cullen  
Executive  
Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
Traffic and Production  
(212) 555-8168**

**P.S. – My closing is not backwards. Yours is. Of course the company name comes before the department.**

* * *

**Isabella Swan  
Wednesday, September 07, 2010 9:57 am  
Subject: Re: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
To: Edward Cullen**

**I'm really glad to have been of service. I would've hated for the loan shark to have beat you to death. Who would sign my checks then? Oh wait, Jasper and Emmett would still be around…**

**Regardless, I'm sincerely happy you survived the ordeal. As much as Alice complains about you, I'm sure she would've missed you. **

**Thanks for the offer to repay me, but it's really not necessary. I had my cup of hot chocolate at home this morning, before leaving for work. Besides, you should keep all your loose change handy in case someone else you've forgotten you owe money to suddenly decides to collect…**

**Finally, regarding the brownie, I caved yesterday afternoon and bought myself one on the way home. I have therefore taken care of my brownie fix for at least another week.**

**Sincerely,**

**Isabella Swan  
****Graphic Artist  
****Creative/Design Department  
****Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
****(212) 555-4121**

**P.S. – Your closing is backwards. Your department should go before the company name.**

* * *

**Edward Cullen  
Wednesday, September 07, 2010 9:32 am  
****Subject: Hot Chocolate? Brownie? Coffee?  
****To: Isabella Swan**

**Good morning Bella. I just wanted to let you know that I am still feeling extremely grateful to you for saving my life. I haven't received a response for my email yesterday, but I wanted you to know my offer still stands. If hot chocolate doesn't interest you this morning (in case you've decided to join the dark side with the rest of us New Yorkers) and would like a cup of coffee instead, I think I could scrounge up enough change to manage one of those too.**

**And I think we both know you'd love a brownie to go with either one of those.**

**What do you say? **

**Sincerely,**

**Edward A. Cullen  
Executive  
Cullen, Cullen & Whitlock Advertising  
Traffic and Production  
(212) 555-8168**

**

* * *

**

_**A/N: A real chapter should be posted by the end of the week, as well as one for IWBAIINE for those of you who are waiting for that. Hope you guys enjoyed this a little bit. Reviews make the updates come quicker. Leave a review and let me know what you thought of E & B's email convo.**_


	7. Chapter 6 Happy Birthday Bella

**A/N: Alright, here's our next chapter. Edward's working on gaining Bella's respect and trust. Let me know how you guys think he's doing. **

**Little Maddie makes an appearance here. I know she's got her own fans reading this.**

**Thanks to my Beta, Danna0724. Without her, my stories wouldn't make a drop of sense half of the time. **

**All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a while.**

**Chapter 6 – Happy Birthday Bella**

_Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love._ – **Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey**

**EPOV**

Isabella Swan was, by far, the most stubborn woman on the face of God's green earth. I was sure of it as I sat at my desk, leaning back on my leather chair and scrolling through the long email chain we'd created in the past few days. I clicked out of my inbox, closing my laptop with a little more force than probably necessary, and swiveled around to my window. I was beyond frustrated.

I mean, it was just a cup of hot chocolate, for God's sake. I shook my head quickly, trying to clear my mind. My thoughts were all a mess lately. Nothing I thought made sense. Nothing I did made sense. I hadn't been out in weeks. I hadn't _wanted_ to be out in weeks. I hadn't wanted to be _with anyone_ in weeks. Well, almost anyone. Fuck, all I could think of lately was how to get Bella Swan to go on a coffee break with me. A God-damned coffee break! I got up and walked over to the windows, standing before the dark and damp day outside with my hands securely in my pockets. The soft rain of the cool September morning pelted insistently against the thick windows. As I gazed outside, I caught sight of my reflection looking back at me sullenly, appearing to ask one question of the man before it, _"Who are you, and what have you done with Edward Cullen?"_ I didn't have an answer.

A light rapping at my door broke me out of my thoughts, and I turned around and walked back to my desk, while calling out, "Come in."

I should've kept my mouth shut.

"Good morning Edward." Lauren walked in slowly, walking towards my desk like she thought she was on some sort of runway or something, and gripping a sketch pad tightly to her overly exposed chest. I repressed an eye roll and quickly diverted my gaze back to my laptop.

"Good morning Lauren," I responded formally. "What's going on?"

Lauren crossed over to my side of the desk, and leaned down over me to place her sketch pad in front of me. Of course, in this position, her tits pressed right up onto my shoulder. I drew in a deep breath before quickly swiveling my seat a few inches away from her.

"I wanted to show you some drafts for the new EverSoft campaign." She spoke in a low purr. "I thought you might enjoy them."

I pursed my lips and turned away from my laptop to look at the sketchpad she'd placed in the middle of my desk. As I flipped it open, I asked, "Have you shown these to Rosalie and Bella yet? They're heading up that campaign and you know Rose needs to see all initial sketches before I…"

The rest of my words got caught in my throat. The first sketch, as expected, was a drawing of a behind, which in and of itself wasn't surprising. The latest campaign was in fact, unofficially titled the 'Baby's Bottom Campaign.' What did shock me was that the bottom that Lauren had apparently sketched most definitely did not belong to a baby.

"Lauren what is this?" I asked coolly. "The campaign calls for a baby's bottom, not a woman's."

She giggled. "I know that silly. These are more like…how shall I say…self-portraits I thought you might enjoy looking through."

"Lauren, I don't have time for this…" I hissed.

"Oh, it won't take too long," she purred again, moving closer to me. "I thought maybe you and I could come up with some copy to go along with these sketches. Maybe if you take a look at the real thing, it'll inspire you to come up with something..."

I gritted my teeth. Once again, I knew I had no one but myself to blame for this shit. A few weeks ago, I probably would've jumped up to lock the door, especially considering the self-imposed dry spell I was in. But damn it, I hadn't even so much as glanced Lauren's way since that day in the conference room. And God knows she'd been trying to get my attention. What the fuck was her problem anyway? How many ways could I make it clear that I wasn't interested in fucking around with her anymore? How dense could she be? She'd picked the wrong fucking day for this shit, not that any other day would've gotten her much better luck at this point. I was a man on a mission, and that mission was to befriend Bella, not to screw Lauren. Between the gloomy day outside and my growing frustration at my inability to complete my mission, I was in no mood for Lauren's bullshit.

"Lauren, please leave my office. Now. In the future, if you have any sketches or samples you'd like to discuss, please show them to Rosalie first. You've been here long enough to know the protocol. I don't need to see any of your work until it's been approved by Rosalie." Lauren rolled her eyes and smirked. "And in this case, Bella should see them first too. Are we clear?" I hoped she got the hidden meaning behind the words. _'Leave me the fuck alone.'_

Lauren's face went from bone white to a deep red. Once I mentioned Bella, a firm scowl formed on her face.

"Bella? Why should I have to clear any of my work with her? She's been here for what, a month?"

"How long she's been here isn't the issue. This whole campaign was her idea-"

"Yeah, and a really stupid idea at that! I can't believe everyone bought into that."

I closed my eyes and counted to ten before responding to Lauren. That she'd have the fucking nerve to criticize Bella's idea infuriated me to the point where I wanted to knock her and her fake tits against the wall.

"Regardless of what _you_ think of the idea" –I began, my voice rising a couple of octaves - "the client loved it. And their opinion is the one that matters. Now I suggest if you really have any valuable input to contribute, you go speak with Bella."

Lauren glared at me, seething. Her over-made-up eyes narrowed into tiny slits, making her look even more snake-like than usual. With a loud huff, she turned on her high heels.

"Can't believe this crap. Now all of a sudden I've got to clear my ideas with _her,_" she mumbled, gripping her sketch pad. "Yeah, sure, I'll go meet with her as soon as she gets back from her coffee break-," she fumed sarcastically.

I ignored the sarcasm and focused only on that last part. "Did you say Bella was out getting coffee?"

Lauren answered warily. "Yeah…"

I nodded slowly, trying to put up my best poker face. "Alright then Lauren, that'll be all," I dismissed her.

Lauren's eyes narrowed. She glared at me suspiciously for a few seconds before turning back around and marching out with a loud slam of the door.

I quickly gathered up my suit jacket and threw it on, grabbing my umbrella and counting to thirty before stepping out, and praying that that was enough time for Lauren to be long gone.

"I'm going down for coffee," I called out quickly to Angela, my secretary, before walking swiftly towards the elevators.

"But Edward, you have a call in five minutes!" Angela reminded me.

The elevator doors opened and I dashed for them. "Reschedule it!"

Bella was just ordering when I ran into Starbucks. I quickly made my way towards her, just as Julie handed her a brownie while Bella held up a bill to her. I swiftly put my hand up to Bella's and brought it down gently, while using my other hand to take my wallet out of my back pocket.

"I've got this." I wondered if she noticed the small shudder that ran through me at the shot of electricity that having her hand in mine caused.

Bella turned to me quickly, her eyes growing wide in shock before morphing into a frown of disapproval. She shook her head.

"Thanks anyway, but I remembered my money this time." She loosened her hand from mine and attempted to hand the bill back to Julie, but I took hold of her hand again. God it was so warm and soft. Completely unlike the hard glare she was giving me now.

I tried again. "Bella…"

"Edward, no."

I sighed, exasperated. Why was she being so difficult about a freakin' cup of hot chocolate for heaven's sake? What was her big hang up with letting me pay?

"Can _somebody_ pay already? The rest of us would like to place our orders too, you know," somebody called out in an irritated tone from the long line forming behind us.

"Edward, let go," Bella commanded. I gritted my teeth. I'd need two hands to remove the bill from my wallet, and it would just take her an instant to hand her money over to Julie. I groaned and let go of her.

Bella cracked a huge, impish smile and with a triumphant grin, turned to Julie and handed her the bill.

"The usual?" Julie asked, batting her eyelashes at me while she handed Bella her change.

I turned to focus on Bella and nodded. Bella chuckled and took a huge bite of her brownie. Jesus, those things had never looked so good.

We walked away to wait for our drinks.

"Why wouldn't you let me pay?"

Bella chuckled again. "My father taught me to never accept gifts from strangers."

"I'm not exactly a stranger."

"You're not exactly someone I know very well either."

"You know, that really hurts, considering all the emails we've shared over the past few days."

Bella rolled her eyes playfully. "Haven't you heard about the dangerous sorts of characters that lurk in cyberspace, pretending to be something they're not? For all I know, you could be some sort of deranged ax murderer or something."

"I think you would've heard on the news or in the papers if there was a deranged ax murderer out on the loose in the city."

She arched a pretty eyebrow, considering this for two seconds while she continued to enjoy her brownie. "Maybe, maybe not…after all, dozens of decapitated bodies washing up on the Hudson's banks can't _possibly_ be more important than a certain young ad exec shopping for a gift for his girlfriend at Tiffany's last night," she deadpanned.

I jerked my head back, surprised that she'd seen that headline in today's Page Six. I was about to tell her I'd been shopping for Esme, whose birthday was coming up, when Jim signaled us over to pick up our drinks. I took them both from him, averting my gaze and pulling my hands away as quickly as possible. When I turned, I saw Bella watching us with a smirk.

I handed her her drink, and we walked out of Starbucks. The constant rain had turned into an even drizzle in the late morning. I quickly popped open my umbrella, preparing to shield Bella with it, noting she didn't carry one of her own.

But Bella surprised me, as she'd continually done so since the day she'd turned the corner in front of that conference room a few weeks ago. Instead of hiding from the rain under the umbrella, she moved away when she saw I was going to cover her with it. And in an action that appeared to have been instinctual, almost without thought, she tilted her head up to the sky, closed her eyes and inhaled deeply as the small drops of drizzle fell on her face; a small smile playing on her lovely lips. The whole thing lasted about four seconds, but as I stood there, watching her intently, I felt like I'd just witnessed one of the most special and purest moments of my life. Watching her worship the clouded skies above us was probably the closest thing I'd had to a religious experience in years.

After what felt like ages, she opened her eyes, and catching me gazing at her, a red blush crept up her cheeks.

"I love the rain," she tried to explain quietly. "It feels…cleansing to me. I've missed it."

"Rain is good," I agreed thoughtfully. And for the first time in my life, I actually believed it.

I closed the umbrella and walked quietly back towards the building with her. We made unimportant small talk on the ride up in the elevator, but Bella refused to look directly at me the whole time. She seemed a lot less comfortable talking to me face to face than she had over email all week. I didn't like it. This wouldn't do if we were going to be friends. Friends interacted more than just over the computer.

Sooner than I would've liked, the elevator doors opened up on the twenty-second floor. Beside me, I thought I heard Bella let out a sigh, almost as if she were relieved.

"Guess I'll talk to you later Edward." She spoke in a low voice as she exited the elevator.

"See you in cyberspace," I promised, already missing the strange warmth I felt whenever she was within a few feet of me, and wondering what I could do to finally befriend this woman.

Tuesday afternoon, I was in a shitty mood. I'd had a crap load of phone calls, production meetings, reviews and all sorts of traffic scheduling going on for the past couple of days. I hadn't even had time to send Bella an email since yesterday morning.

Nonetheless, I'd waited - as had become my daily habit - to catch a glimpse of Bella on her way home – hidden in my usual corner. While I waited, I'd given myself a second or two, once again, to examine the craziness that had become my mind over the past couple of weeks.

What the fuck was I doing?

In what universe did this make sense; cutting my work day short every single day just so that I could stick myself in this little corner and watch a woman who apparently wanted nothing to do with me, unless it was through a computer? And as if that wasn't enough to prove I was definitely going bat shit, this morning when I'd woken up and turned my head towards the window and found another dark, rainy day, I'd actually smiled. _I'd fucking _s_miled_. I _hated _the rain; always had. Who the hell smiled when they saw it was going to be a rainy day?

Bella Swan apparently did. She smiled and relaxed and sighed in contentment. And fuck if that didn't make the rain my best friend now.

But this afternoon, Bella had never passed through the lobby. Somehow, I'd missed her, even though I always made sure I was down here by ten to five, at the latest, just in case. She'd either passed right by me and I hadn't noticed –yeah, like that was even possible- or she'd left work early today.

Now I was worried. Why would she have left early? Did she not feel well? Was something wrong with Maddie?

As I sat in traffic still only a couple of blocks from CCW, these were the thoughts running through my head. Was I really going insane? Was this obsession way beyond normal? I already knew the answer to that one, but I pretended not to.

Out of the corner of my eye, all the way down the block where the steps leading down into the underground subway station were, a figure caught my attention, quickly exiting away from the steps, along with about a dozen other people. But all the other figures fell into a blurry background as I realized who the main person walking away from the station was; she might as well have been the _only_ person on the entire block.

Bella walked back up the block quickly, an annoyed expression on her face.

And at some unknown point during this, I'd apparently pulled my car out of traffic somehow, and parked it in a 'No Parking Any Time' zone, and was now walking towards her.

Bella saw me when I was about two feet away, and stopped in her tracks. When she looked at me, I could tell that she was definitely upset.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

She closed her eyes and opened them back up slowly before speaking. "The goddamned train, I've been waiting for forty-five minutes and _now_ they announce that due to some goddamned track fire or something, it's delayed. No shit it's delayed. Forty-five goddamned minutes _later_, and _now_ they announce it's delayed. "

Surprised at how many times she'd taken the Lord's name in vain and the fact that she'd said 'shit', it took me a couple of seconds to answer.

"That's the New York City Transit system for you. That's why I always drive to work."

She smirked at me. "Well, good for you, I'm sure Mother Earth wouldn't want _you_ sacrificing yourself like the rest of us or anything." Oh yeah, she was upset. She moved her eyes away from me, scanning the streets as if she were looking for something. "Now I've got to figure out how to take the bus to Brooklyn. I promised Maddie I'd be home early today, and instead I'm going to be later than usual."

I didn't have to think twice. "Come on Bella. I'll drop you off."

Her eyes moved back to me quickly, growing wide in surprise. "What? No! I'm going to take the bus-"

God, this woman was so freakin' stubborn. "Bella, you don't even know what bus to take. I was headed towards DUMBO anyway; I'm going to stop by and visit Alice tonight." A total lie, but what the hell, I supposed it was time to make up with my bratty little sister in person, since phone calls weren't doing the trick.

Bella, of course, was not easily convinced. "No, that's fine. Thanks anyway. I'll just ask someone."

I sighed. "Look, you said you promised Maddie you'd be home early tonight. Well, by the time you figure out what bus you need to take, and then actually get on it" -I pointed at the lines of people situated at different intervals along the next couple of blocks; her eyes widened again as she realized these were the bus stops – "its going to be later than usual. Plus, you don't have an umbrella and you'll catch something and then pass it on to Maddie." I saw a slight look of alarm cross her face. For a split second, I felt slightly guilty to be using scare tactics to convince her, but hey, if it worked… "I'm going in the same direction, and if anything, you'll be doing me and Mother Earth a favor here by carpooling with me."

Bella stared at me, biting her lip and appearing to weigh her options. Finally, and more than a little reluctantly, she nodded. "Okay, thank you."

I grinned widely and led the way back to my car, opening the door for Bella and jogging back to my side before she could change her mind.

As soon as Bella was buckled, I pulled back into traffic. Glancing over at Bella, I noticed she was sitting as far away from me as possible, practically up against the passenger side door. She seemed nervous and tense.

"You know, you don't have to be so ready to bolt. I don't bite."

He eyes shot over to me quickly, and she seemed to realize how tense she was. Her lips twitched for an instant and then she smiled, relaxing slightly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to appear ungrateful. It's just that I'm really anxious to get home tonight."

"Don't apologize to me Bella." I grinned at her. "I promise. I'll get you home to Maddie as quickly as possible."

"Thank you," she repeated once again. We were quiet for a few minutes, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence.

"Nice car," Bella exclaimed suddenly, looking around. I grinned proudly. I loved my cars, and the Audi was definitely one of my favorites. I suddenly found myself wondering what Bella would look like in the front seat of the Porsche. That was weird. I'd never let _any_ girl inside the Porsche.

"Thanks. Did you drive back in Forks?"

Bella's smile turned wistful. "Yes, I had a truck. A 1968 Chevy actually. Chief Swan, my dad, got it for me when I got my license. I drove it 'til the day I moved over here."

I raised an eyebrow, forcing myself to keep my eyes on the road. "A truck? Really? I wouldn't have pictured you in a truck."

I could see the smirk on Bella's face out of the corner of my eye. "Why not? What kind of car _would_ you picture me in?"

Pursing my lips, I gave it some thought. "I would've thought a nice little sedan or something." I turned to study her quickly. "Maybe a Volvo?"

Bella laughed out loud now. "That's funny because that's actually the kind of car I'd like to get someday. Nice and safe."

"A Volvo? Interesting." I liked Volvos. I'd actually been thinking of adding one to my collection, but my father always complained when I brought another car up to the house in Long Island. _'Another toy Edward?'_ he'd reproach. And then I'd get the whole 'grow up' speech all over again.

We made some more small talk, until we'd crossed the Brooklyn Bridge into DUMBO, and Bella gave me directions on how to get to Sue's brownstone. I found a parking space right in front.

"Well, thanks for the ride. I really appreciate it." Bella put her hand on the handle to open the door.

"I'll wait for you."

Bella turned around to face me, one leg in the car, one out. "You don't have to do that. I'm only a short walk from here."

I rolled my eyes. Had she really thought I was going to let her walk home? And with a slight drizzle still falling? I mean, I knew she had a thing for the rain and all, but there was just no way. I realized then, Bella was really independent. Stubborn and independent and she seemed to have a thing against being taken care of.

"Bella, there is no way I'm going to let you and Maddie walk home in the rain. I'll wait, and then I'll drop you off and be on my way. Alice probably hasn't closed the studio yet anyway." There was no room for argument in my tone. I could be stubborn too.

Bella bit her lip, looking like she was going to argue, but the look on my face must've told her it was useless. I wasn't going anywhere until I dropped her and Maddie safely off at home. She inhaled deeply and stepped out of the car, mumbling, "I'll be out in five minutes."

The rain suddenly ceased as soon as Bella stepped into the brownstone, and I took advantage of the peaking rays of sunshine and stepped out of the car; leaning up against the passenger's side to wait for Bella and Maddie. It was September thirteenth, and the days were beginning to get shorter and cooler; might as well take advantage of every bit of sun and warmth left in the year.

Bella walked out exactly five minutes later, holding Maddie in her arms. And as soon as my eyes caught sight of the little girl, my heart did a double-take, and I was suddenly anxious to have her nearer and look into those big chocolate eyes set between that sweet, caramel face. But Maddie wasn't looking my way just yet, her face was intently focused on her mother's, chatting away excitedly about something while Bella, looking slightly anxious, appeared to be attempting to explain something important to Maddie in a low voice.

"Okay Maddie?" Bella asked Maddie quickly, just a few short feet away now. Bella looked at Maddie anxiously, seeming desperate for confirmation to whatever she just whispered in her ear. "Remember what I said okay?"

"Okay Mommy," Maddie responded quickly before going back to whatever she'd been telling Bella. "…and then we saw the penguins come out and they were black and white, and Juliana said huh mommy's gonna get huh a penguin and Sue said penguins only live in zoos and Antica and Juliana said huh penguins gonna live in huh house and I said penguins can't live in your house and she said huh penguins gonna sleep in huh bed and I told huh penguins can't sleep in your bed 'cause they'd get too hot and she said…"

Just then, Maddie turned her face away from her mom and spotted me. And although she was only four, and she'd only met me once about three weeks ago, and although it made _no sense whatsoever_, when her eyes locked on mine, her whole face lit up, and the double-take in my heart wasn't even a double-take anymore. It was an intense pull; like her eyes were magnets able to reach some part of me I hadn't been aware existed and pull me in with just those baby browns.

"Edwood! Edwood!"

Maddie wriggled herself out of Bella's arms so quickly that Bella had to let go of her before she knocked them both to the floor. And just like the flash she'd been three weeks ago in the office, she ran the last few feet towards me so quickly that I was picking her up and twirling her in the air before I even knew what was going on.

"Maddie!"

I could hear the excitement in my own voice, even if I couldn't understand it. It was incredible how absolutely overjoyed I felt at seeing her again. As if something of mine had gone missing, something I hadn't even _realized_ had been missing. But now that it had finally been returned, it made me that much more whole.

"Edwood, did you come to play with me?" she asked excitedly as I placed her carefully on the ground. Her warm, small hand slipped into mine quickly, holding on to me tightly as if she were afraid I'd leave if she let go. "Are you going to come see my house and my toys? I want to show you my dream catcha!" Abruptly, her already excited eyes brightened even more as a new thought occurred to her. "Are you coming to eat dinner with us at the Seaport? For mommy's bowthday?" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Bella grimace before closing her eyes tightly and shaking her head.

"Maddie honey, I think Edward was on his way to see his sister Alice-"

"Actually, Alice wasn't expecting me. It's your birthday Bella?"

Bella pursed her lips and sighed in resignation before nodding once.

"Oh peez Edwood, peez, peez, peez! Peez come eat with us for mommy's bowthday." She turned around to face her mother, her hand still wrapped tightly around my own. "Mommy can Edwood come with us? Peez?"

Maddie looked up at Bella with eyes full of hope and trust and innocence, and I immediately knew Bella wouldn't be able to deny her, because there was no way _I_ could've denied little Maddie anything at that moment.

Bella sighed loudly, giving me a nervous glance before bringing her eyes back to Maddie. "Well, sure he's welcome to come along if he wants to, but he's probably got plans already honey-"

"I don't have any plans actually. I'd love to come along."

"Yay!" Maddie cheered, squeezing my hand even tighter. I was amazed at how warm her hand felt. "Edwood's coming with us!" I looked down at her and grinned.

Bella took Maddie's hand then and mumbled something else about going to borrow a car seat from Sue, and Maddie let go of my hand reluctantly and took Bella's. As she walked away, Maddie turned around.

"Pwomise you won't leave?" she asked, the corners of her mouth turning down slightly at just the thought.

"I'm not going anywhere princess. I'll be right here when you come out," I promised, and her little mouth turned up again as she skipped back into the brownstone with Bella.

When Bella and Maddie came back out, Bella appeared to have relaxed a bit, and I felt better about forcing my company on her.

"So where are we eating?" I asked, once we'd installed Maddie's car seat and fastened her safely. Well, once _Bella_ installed Maddie's car seat and fastened her in safely. I had no clue how those things worked.

"Pizza!" Maddie cried enthusiastically from the back seat. I smiled at her through the rearview mirror. "Do you like pizza Edwood?" she asked, watching me through the mirror herself.

"I love pizza. It's one of my favorite foods."

"Me too! But mommy says I can't have it too much. She says I have to eat healthy food, like fuuts and vegebles. Do you like fuuts and vegebles Edwood?"

"Yes I do. I like strawberries and broccoli."

"I like stwawbewies and bwottoli too! And so does mommy. Don't you mommy?"

"Yes, my love."

"See? My mommy makes me stwawbewie shotecake, and she makes me sau, sau, sau-"

"Sauteed, sweety."

"Sautee bwottoli. And she makes me lots of other yummy stuff."

"Sounds like your mommy's a great cook," I agreed, smiling over at Bella. She kept her eyes trained straight ahead, but I could see a small smile on her lips.

"Mommy can make anything. When you come to my house, mommy can make you whatever you want. Can't you mommy?"

"Um-"

"What kinds of pizza do you like Maddie? Do you like pepperoni?"

"Peppuhwoni's yucky! I only like cheese on my pizza. But my mommy likes peppuhwoni. Don't you mommy? Do you like peppuhwoni Edwood?"

I chuckled. "Yes, princess. I like pepperoni."

"Then you can shaeuh with mommy. Mommy says it's good to shaeuh. But Matthew doesn't shaeuh with me at the pahk. He pushes me off the swings."

"Who's Matthew?"

"Matthew's my friend at the pahk wheuh Sue takes me and Juliana. But he's mean to me sometimes."

"What does he do to you?" I wasn't smiling anymore.

"He pushes me and tells me I'm too little to play with him and Petuh."

I turned to Bella. "Did you know about this?"

Bella looked at me, her eyebrows raised. "Sue keeps a close eye on things. She's told me Matthew can be a little rough sometimes, but Sue makes sure it doesn't get out of hand."

I focused on parking the car by the river as she spoke, not as satisfied with Sue's handling of the situation as Bella appeared to be.

I turned the car off and turned to Maddie.

"Maddie, next time Matthew bothers you, you tell him Edward's going to come have a few words with him, man to man, about respecting little ladies."

Bella's head whipped back around to me. "Edward!"

"What?"

"He's a six year old boy!"

"So? He's old enough to know better."

Bella stared at me incredulously for a few seconds. I stared back at her, confused.

"Sue can handle it Edward. Maddie'll be fine."

"Oh, alright then," I agreed reluctantly. Having never really dealt with toddlers, unless Alice counted, I couldn't argue with her. But I made a mental note to find out where this park was. Maybe I could take a stroll down there one of these afternoons…

Walking towards the water taxi that would take us to the Seaport, Maddie took hold of my hand and skipped happily along with Bella at her other side. When the water taxi arrived, Bella tried to carry Maddie in, but she refused to let go of my hand, and Bella finally relented and allowed me to carry Maddie in.

Maddie looked all around the boat excitedly. "This boat's bigguh than grampa's mommy!" she exclaimed, getting on her knees on the bench and turning around to face the water.

"Your grampa has a boat?" I asked curiously.

"Uh huh, he takes me fishing sometimes. Sometimes Uncoe Jake comes too."

I looked at Bella, who was sitting on Maddie's other side. "You have a brother?"

"No. Jake's more like my…best friend…sort of…"

"Oh," I said. I wondered what that trail-off at the end there meant…

"Do you have a boat Edwood?" I turned my attention back to the little doll next to me, looking up at me with wide, curious eyes.

"Yes, my family does. Maybe one day your mommy will bring you to Long Island," –Bella glanced up at me- "with my sister Alice or my mother Esme, and you can go fishing with us on our boat."

"Is it as big as this one?" she asked, wide eyed. I didn't want to brag that it was bigger, and definitely a lot more luxurious.

"It's about this size."

"Wow. That's big." She turned her brown eyes towards Bella. "Mommy doesn't like to fish."

I laughed.

"Mommy, when we go fishing with Edwood, will you come with us?"

Bella reddened, her eyes quickly jumping up to me before trailing down to her daughter again. "Peez Mommy? Can we all go together? Peez?"

"Sure Maddie, why not?" Bella answered, but her facial expression didn't match her words.

Once the water taxi reached the Seaport, I picked Maddie up and hoisted her carefully off the boat, putting my hand out to help Bella. She took it carefully, and for a split second, with Maddie safely in one arm and Bella's hand in my other, I felt a strange awareness, as if at this moment, the universe was in perfect alignment, and everything around me was exactly as it should be.

But as soon as both of Bella's feet were on land, she let go of my hand quickly.

We walked down the pier towards Uno's Pizzeria, where Bella had promised Maddie we'd eat. I would've preferred to take them to one of the nicer restaurants in the area, but I didn't want to 'rock the boat,' so to speak.

Two teen-aged girls walking in the opposite direction looked directly at me, giggling quietly with each other. I averted my gaze and looked down at Maddie; still, I could hear them whispering. "OhmyGod, ohmyGod! It _is_ him! Oh. My. God!" I rolled my eyes.

A loud sigh from Maddie's other side caught my attention. I looked up at Bella, who was biting her lip and glaring at me.

"Can you do me a favor?"

"Sure, whatever you want," I answered quickly.

"Well, it just seems that, well…you know…you attract a lot of attention, and well, Maddie and I really value our privacy. Can you like, maybe make yourself less recognizable somehow?"

I stood there, dumbfounded. This was definitely different. I'd never been out in public with someone who wanted me to be _less_ recognizable. How exactly was I supposed to do that?

Just then, I caught sight of a vendor's table in front of one the little stores we'd just passed. A display of baseball caps, 'I Love NY' mugs, 'I Love NY' T-shirts, sunglasses and a bunch of other touristy crap lay carefully spread out on the table. A large sign that read "Souvenirs" hung off the side. Turning to shoot Bella a quick smile, I quickly jogged back towards the table. I could hear Maddie's little footsteps following eagerly behind me.

Gingerly, I picked up a pair of dark shades; cheap plastic, but they'd do for now, and a dark blue Yankees cap. No way in hell I'd be caught dead with any other teams logo anywhere on me.

Maddie watched me as I put the shades and the cap on, her eyes wide. "Uncoe Jake wears a cap like that too. His is blue too," – her little brows furrowed in the middle and she wrinkled her little nose, as if she were trying to figure something out –"'cept his has a biiig S in the middle," she continued, pointing at the letters 'N' and 'Y' that were merged in the middle of my cap.

I held in a smirk. 'Uncle Jakey' was probably a Mariners fan. Those losers had never even won a title.

"Yeah, well you're a New Yorker now princess. And here in New York, it's all about the Yankees. That big S means nothing down here." I heard a snort and looked up at Bella, who was listening to my speech with pursed lips, but I could see the corners of her mouth twitching.

Sporting my cheap shades and my cool Yankees cap, I turned back towards the souvenir table. Spotting a cute, pink Yankees cap, I picked it up and carefully placed it on Maddie's little head, adjusting the Velcro in the back until it fit her almost just right. It was still a little too big, hanging just a bit past her big brown eyes, but damn it if it didn't make her look impossibly more adorable.

"There we go," I said, as I pushed the cap back a bit so it didn't cover her eyes so much. "Now you look like a real New Yorker." She giggled up at me.

Taking out my wallet, I pulled out some money to pay for my purchases. Suddenly, a delicate, warm hand was on my arm, soft but determined.

"Edward-" Bella began in a warning tone, "you can't buy that cap for Maddie."

"Why not?" I asked, confused.

Bella sighed. Her forehead wrinkled up with worry lines. "I know it's not a big deal to you," -she spoke in a low voice, so that Maddie couldn't hear her- "but it is to me." She sighed again. "Whatever Maddie really needs, _I _can provide for her."

"Bella, it's just a cap."

Bella stared at me for a split second, but her expression didn't waver. Abruptly, she reached into her purse, fumbling for her wallet.

"Bella stop." She didn't listen to me, pulling out her little wallet and opening it up to get her money out. "Please," I finally begged, putting a hand out to stop her from pulling out her money. "_Please_ just let me get her this. It would mean a lot to me."

She closed her eyes then, seeming to struggle with some internal decision. She finally looked up at me, and again, she had that look she'd given me before, on the water taxi, equal parts confusion and frustration. But she also looked resigned now. She nodded slowly, and put her wallet away.

"What do you say to Edward, Maddie?" Bella coached from her other side, as we strolled down the pier.

"Thank you so much Edwood! I love my cap. Wait 'til I tell Grampa and Uncoe Jake about it!" I smiled, despite the mention of 'Uncle Jakey'…again.

"You're very welcome princess, it fits you perfectly. Like you were born to be a Yankee girl." I heard Bella chuckle lightly. I breathed a sigh of relief; that she was starting to loosen up again.

We made our way into Uno's, waiting to be seated by the hostess. Glancing down at the little princess gripping tightly to my hand, I pulled the cap off of her playfully, feeling strangely ecstatic at the fact that I'd bought it for her, and placed it back on her head backwards. Little loose strands of dark hair hung loosely at the sides, adding to the cuteness factor.

Maddie let go of my hand momentarily to pat down on her new cap. "Uncoe Jake tuhns his cap backwuhds too," she giggled.

I stiffened involuntarily. I quickly took her cap off and readjusted it. "Actually, why don't we keep it facing forward?" I suggested, keeping my tone even. Uncle Jakey was seriously starting to piss me off.

Maddie shrugged, swinging our hands between us. "Shooah," she agreed.

The hostess arrived and led us to a small table outside. She stared at me curiously as she handed us our menus, but I was pretty sure she didn't recognize me. Nevertheless, she smiled widely at me as she left to get our drinks, and I turned away quickly. Maddie had already begun coloring with the crayons and paper the hostess had handed her.

"Edwood color with me peez?" she asked sweetly, gazing at me through her long, dark eyelashes.

I picked up one of the crayons. "Of course princess, I've been waiting to color with you for weeks." Maddie smiled widely, and we proceeded to draw and color a very interesting picture full of strange shapes I couldn't recognize, but which Maddie assured me were dogs and cats and rabbits. Eventually, Bella joined in, drawing perfect and whimsical stars, clouds and mountains. When our food came, we put the picture aside and I watched with pure rapture as the little girl before me and her mom put away two whole pies. Those two could pack it in. As I stared at Bella while she picked up her fourth slice of the evening, she smiled mockingly.

"What?" she asked. "Not used to eating with girls who actually enjoy their food?"

I laughed, but didn't answer, surprised at how well she'd read me.

Maddie finished drawing while Bella and I finished our pizza. We did, indeed, share a pepperoni pie.

Maddie finally looked up from her masterpiece. "Edwood, look what I dwew!"

There were the cute but misshapen animals I'd helped her with earlier, as well as the background her mother had added. But now, Maddie had drawn three people, standing in front of the mountains, hand in hand. A man whose hair had been colored in brown and red crayon, a child with long brown hair, holding his hand, and on her other side, holding her other hand, was a woman with the same long brown hair.

"It's me, you and mommy togethuh!"

I could see, out of the corner of my eye, Bella's eyes open wide, the last of her pizza hanging in mid-air, where her hand stood frozen. She swallowed audibly.

"Maddie-"

"That is the most beautiful picture I've ever seen," I assured Maddie.

"It's for you," she confirmed in a happy voice, handing it over to me.

I took it from her. "Thank you. Can I take it home with me?"

"Shooah. I dwew it fuh you 'cause you're my best friend. But don't tell Juliana 'cause she's 'posed to be my best friend."

I chuckled. "I won't tell her," I promised.

I looked over at Bella, smiling, but the look on her face made me frown. She appeared extremely uneasy and pale. Without looking at anyone, she put her slice down and said, "I think it's time to go."

After threatening to let everyone in the office know tomorrow that today had been her birthday, Bella finally relented and let me pay for dinner, as long as I promised not to make the Uno's staff sing her 'Happy Birthday.'

Outside, the day had grown darker, signaling the approach of twilight. "Stay close to mommy Maddie. Don't run too far ahead," Bella called out as we walked silently side by side. Maddie had wanted to go to the river's edge, to see Brooklyn from this side, and Bella had agreed reluctantly. She seemed anxious to have the night over. It was the first time all night Maddie hadn't been less than a few inches away from us. And as much as I'd truly enjoyed being with her, I couldn't deny that strolling down the pier semi-alone with Bella, with the sun setting behind us, wasn't sending a pleasant tingling sensation down my spine.

Still, the first words that came out of my mouth had to do with Maddie. "She really is a beautiful little girl." The words were unplanned, almost instinctive, as I watched her skipping happily just ahead of us, talking to little Angie.

Bella, chuckled, keeping her eyes carefully on Maddie. "I sure think so," she agreed. She sighed.

"What is it?"

She was silent for a moment before answering me. "It's just…it feels good to see her finally settling in, you know?" I looked over at her and tilted my head in question, because no, I didn't know. She cleared her throat and swallowed. "She had a bit of a hard time those first few weeks after we moved here."

I frowned, the pleasant feeling traveling down my spine turning to concern now. "She's okay now though, isn't she?"

Bella smiled. "Yes, she is. I guess it was just a matter of getting used to such a different situation." She exhaled. "You know, as a parent, you try to shelter your child from everything, but sometimes you can't do that, no matter how hard you try." She sighed again, almost sadly. "Eventually, she'll grow up, and she'll start to see for herself that no one's perfect, and that…that we all make mistakes." She let out a huge gust of breath again. "Even her heroes." I watched her intently as we walked on slowly, tilting my head and trying to understand what exactly she meant. Just then, we passed by a news booth; the owner was bringing the metal gates down, getting ready to close for the night. I saw Bella's eyes trail up to the magazine covers lining the booth's wall. _**'Millionaire Hunk Ed Cullen **_(I hated that nickname)_** Having Baby With Brit Brit!'**_, two pictures split side by side, one of Britney with a huge grin on her face and one of me with a surprised look, lay below the headline. I rolled my eyes and caught Bella's stare. She averted her gaze, but not before I'd caught a hint of disapproval in her expression. I tilted my head to the side again, studying her. She had to know that was a total lie. Didn't she?

Bella looked back at me, smiling dryly. "Don't worry. _Your _status as Maddie's hero should be safe. She can't read yet."

I smirked. "Bella, you know that's not true, don't you?' I asked, referring to the headline. "I've never even met Britney, much less gotten close enough to her to father her latest child. I don't think we've ever even been in the same room together. And...and the other day, I was shopping for Esme at Tiffany's, no one else." I wasn't sure why, but I needed her to know that.

Bella raised an eyebrow at me in question. "Doesn't it bother you then, if they're lies; seeing yourself up on display like that all the time?"

I shrugged, "_I_ know what's true and what's not. That's all that really matters." But even as I said the words, I wondered if it was really true anymore, because why then had I been so anxious to make sure Bella knew what was true and what wasn't?

Bella watched me intently, as if she were trying to figure something out. "I guess it's different when you only have yourself to worry about," she finally said. There was no harshness in her tone, only a statement of fact. Nevertheless, her words left me with an empty feeling.

"You really value your privacy, don't you?"

"Don't you? Doesn't it bother you for everyone to know every aspect of your life all the time? Do you really enjoy having everyone examine every move you make?"

"I…don't really care what people that I don't know want to think or say of me Bella. They don't know me enough to judge me."

"But they _do_ judge you Edward, whether they know you or not. They judge you on every decision you make, on every mistake you make. And…" –her eyes took on a far away look, as if she were remembering something that had hurt her deeply- "and not only do they judge you, but they judge your family based on the things you've done. Or what they perceive that you've done based on all the facts they think they have." She looked up at me, and her expression was wry, almost angry. "People can be very malicious Edward. And what you think is your own private business sometimes turns out to be a most exciting soap opera for the lives of a bored, misinformed and unwanted audience. They think it's their right to comment on your life. And when what they think and say starts affecting the lives of those you love, well then…then you do care what they say."

I nodded, feeling suddenly ashamed. What she said was basically along the same lines as the warning Alice had been giving me for years now, but from Bella, it seemed more…personal. Like perhaps she'd had to live like that once. But Bella Swan wasn't, as far as I knew, any sort of celebrity. At least not to the general public; it may or may not have been a different case in my book. So how would she know what it was like to have people you didn't know judge your life and your decisions, both good and bad ones?

Before I could respond though, Bella was quickly rushing forward, reaching out for Maddie. "Madisen Grace Swan! Slow down! You're too far ahead!" Without thinking, I was running off in front of her, quickly catching up to Maddie, who'd wandered extremely close to the river's edge. I grabbed hold of her and hoisted her into my arms, swinging her around in a circle so as not to frighten her.

"Slow down there Speedy Gonzalez, you almost gave your mom and me a coronary."

"Whose Speedy Gonzez, and what's a corary?"

I laughed as Bella caught up to us, just then realizing how quickly my heart had begun beating.

Bella reached up for Maddie, and I placed her in her arms. "Maddie, don't you ever run off like that again." She hugged Maddie close to her.

Maddie's muffled voice answered from under Bella's chest. "Sauwy Mommy."

Bella looked up at me with Maddie still nuzzled against her. "Thanks," she mouthed.

I nodded quickly, and then Bella turned away and started walking again with Maddie in her arms. But it took me a couple of seconds to move. Something she'd said had surprised me.

Madisen Grace _Swan._

Earlier, when Bella had called her father Chief Swan, I'd assumed Swan was her maiden name.

But then how come _Maddie's_ last name was Swan?

Before I could give it anymore thought, I caught site of Maddie and Bella by the waterfront now. Bella was sitting on a wooden bench, watching Maddie perform the most complex ballet moves I'd seen a four year old do since Alice had been that age. I watched her, completely enchanted and in disbelief.

Bella turned around. She tilted her head and frowned when she saw me still in the same spot.

"Everything okay?" she asked once I'd caught up to her.

"Yeah, everything's fine. Where'd she learn to dance like that?" I asked.

Bella chuckled. "Not from me, that's for sure. Sue Collins, her old babysitter, had a thing for ballet." She shrugged. "I guess it rubbed off on Maddie."

I watched as Maddie pirouetted in a graceful circle, completely oblivious to the passersby who watched her.

"That's more than just it rubbing off on her. Has Alice seen her dance?" I asked.

Bella smiled. "No, I don't think so. Not yet."

I sat next to Bella, my eyes still on the little prima ballerina and her graceful dance. "Well, she should." I looked over at Bella now. "You know Alice owns a dance studio in your neighborhood." Alice Cullen, although barely twenty-five, had earned the reputation of perhaps the best ballet instructor in the tri-state area. She'd once had a very promising career as a prima ballerina herself but…well, the accident had taken that away from her. Her naturally feisty spirit forbade that from bringing her down though, and since, she'd used her talent to instruct other little girls in her favorite art. A space in her dance studio with her as instructor was a very sought after goal among young girls in New York City.

Bella rolled her eyes, but the small smile was still on her lips. "Yes, I do know that."

"And?" I questioned, wondering why, with Maddie's obvious talent, even to someone with my untrained eye, Bella hadn't tried to get her into one of Alice's classes.

"And," Bella answered, shaking her head and looking towards Maddie again. She hesitated before continuing. "Things like that, well," she bit her lip, looking down at her lap, "I just can't right now."

I watched her, wondering what she was talking about, when it suddenly hit me. And when it did, it made me angry. Not with her, but at myself, that I should be so stupid; because it wasn't something I would've ever had to consider. And angry that it was something she and Maddie should have to consider.

"Has Alice told you about the discount program for CCW employees?" Another lie. But the words just popped out of my mouth.

Bella's head shot up. Her eyes met mine, and I could tell she didn't believe me.

"What discount program?" she asked skeptically.

"Well, Alice gives a fifty percent discount to her school to all CCW employees and their families."

Bella pursed her lips, still doubtful. "Really? How come I never heard of that?"

"Well, you'd never heard of the Child Care List until I mentioned it either," I replied, thinking fast.

Bella looked over at Maddie to make sure she was okay and then turned her eyes back to me, narrowing them. "I don't believe you."

Without hesitation I answered, "Ask Alice yourself if you don't believe me." I was digging myself into a deep hole, but damn it, Maddie had some serious talent. Bella had to put her in Alice's classes. I pulled out my cell phone and as I did so, I knew this would go either of two ways. Either Alice would tell Bella I was lying, in which case there went any chance of Bella ever trusting me. Or my other hope, that Alice's knack for scheming would kick in, that she'd forget she wasn't speaking to me at the moment, and that she'd be willing to lie to her friend for me. Yeah, my chances didn't look too good as I dialed Alice's number with Bella's wary eyes intently on me.

"What do you want Edward?" Alice answered her cell phone. She wasn't going to forgive me until I admitted to her that taking Tanya to her house a couple of weeks ago had been a stupid thing to do. And while I agreed that it had been moronic, I wasn't in the habit of admitting my mistakes to my little sister.

"Don't hang up," I hissed into the phone, and then added quickly, "I'm at the Seaport with Bella and Maddie."

That seemed to get her attention. She was silent for about two seconds. "I'm listening," she finally said.

I went straight to the point. I was either royally fucked or not at this point; there was no point in delaying it. "Have you seen Maddie dance yet?"

"Uh, no. Why? Should I?" Alice asked, excitement seeping into her voice.

"I think you should. How come you never told Bella about the discount CCW families get at the dance school?"

"What?" Alice answered. I repressed a groan.

Bella's hand suddenly shot out, reaching towards the phone. "Let me speak to her," she asked. I cursed internally, but slowly handed her the phone.

"Hey Alice..." I could hear Alice's high pitched voice on the other line.

"Well, I just…I didn't…"

I flexed my jaw, wondering what Alice was saying on the other line.

"Are you sure? I never…well, only if you're sure…" Her eyes shot back to me, and they were no longer as doubtful, although still slightly wary. "Alright, we'll talk more about it later then. Let me put your brother back on."

I took the phone from her, not daring to breathe. "Yes Alice?"

"I told Bella CCW employees get half off lessons. She's going to bring Maddie during the week so that I can evaluate her."

I let out a breath when Bella got up to walk over to Maddie. My sister had always had an uncanny way with knowing exactly what I was up to. It wasn't always a good thing, but in this case...

"We'll talk later," I whispered quietly into the phone. I wasn't stupid. I knew there was no way in hell Alice wasn't going to demand more information.

Alice giggled mischievously, her irritation with me all but forgotten. "Oh I _know _we will. I'll be waiting once you drop them off at home. See ya bro!" She hung up. I closed the phone and groaned quietly.

Back in my car a short while later, as I was driving Bella and Maddie back home, I made a huge mistake.

"How'd you know to make that right on Smith Street?" Bella asked me, giving me a curious look.

My hands tightened around the wheel. "Well, you live by Alice, right? And this is the way I'd go to Alice's from here."

"Oh."

I let Bella direct me the rest of the way back to her place.

Maddie had fallen asleep in the back seat. One minute she'd been talking happily about how much fun she'd had tonight, and how she couldn't wait to show Juliana her new Yankees cap, and the next, I'd looked in the rearview mirror and her head was leaning back against the car seat we'd borrowed from Sue, turned to the side; her little cherub face looked happy and peaceful as she dreamt of penguins and rabbits and Yankee caps and pizza. I smiled, turning my eyes back to the road.

When we'd pulled in front of Bella's building, I turned the car off and quickly moved to the other side to help Bella get Maddie out of the car.

"Do you need help?" I asked, watching Bella hold a sleeping Maddie in her arms.

"Oh no, I've got it, thanks," Bella whispered. I nodded, even though I hated that she wouldn't let me help.

We stood there for a few moments, neither one of us knowing what to say next.

Bella broke the silence. "Well, thanks Edward...for tonight, for the ride home, for…coming with us to dinner."

I chuckled. "Sorry if I intruded on your night on the town with Maddie."

She laughed once. "No, you didn't intrude." She hesitated. "Look, I apologize if I wasn't the best...company tonight, but birthdays just aren't my thing."

"Bella, I enjoyed both you and Maddie's company immensely. I had a great time," I said seriously.

She cracked a small smile and looked down. "Edward…I just want to tell you" –she paused, organizing her words- "I can see that Maddie really likes you, and you seem to really like her." I nodded, because it was true, of course.

Bella looked up, meeting my gaze again. "But…you really shouldn't tell her that she can come fishing with you, or that…that you're going to be her friend forever." She sighed. "She's only four. She takes these things to heart."

I frowned. "When I said I wanted her, _and you_, to go fishing with us one day, I completely meant it. And when I said I wanted to be her friend, I meant that too. I'll be her friend" – _and yours_, I thought- "for as long as she wants; until she grows tired of me. I don't say things Bella, unless I really mean them."

Bella bit her lip; that frustrated and confused look plastered on her face again.

"Look," I continued, "I know the things you see and hear about me…well, they probably make you wonder…" -a recollection of Bella rounding the hallway just as I stepped out of the conference room with Lauren behind me flashed through my memory, making me cringe- "but Bella, that's not who I am, at least…not anymore."

"Then _who_ _are_ you?" Her voice sounded frustrated, and the piercing way she gazed at me through those deep brown eyes left me momentarily speechless.

When I finally found my voice again, I answered honestly. "I…I don't know that right now." Her eyes turned down; as if she were unsatisfied with my answer. "But I do know that I want to be someone who can hang out with you and Maddie without having to wear cheap shades and a cap," I finished.

Bella looked up again, considering this answer, before her face suddenly broke out into a grin. "Yeah, good luck with that," she laughed.

I grinned back at her, grateful that my answer seemed to have been enough. For now, at least.

"Are you sure you don't need help?" I asked her once more, my arms aching to reach out and carry Maddie for her. Bella was so petite, so fragile-looking, but at the same time, I knew she could be extremely strong.

She smiled and shook her head, smirking as if she could read my thoughts. "Good night Edward," she murmured quietly before turning around and walking towards her building with Maddie asleep in her arms. I watched them, torn between a need to thank God for tonight - because it had been so many thousand times better than a friggen hot chocolate at Starbucks - and the strange overwhelming sensation that, as great as this night had been, something about it wasn't quite right; that Bella and Maddie shouldn't be walking _away._

But no matter what my feelings may have been, tonight, this was where it ended. "Good night girls," I answered in the same low voice. "And happy birthday Bella."

**So? Thoughts? Comments?**

**Bella POV next. **

**Reviews please and thank you.**


	8. Chapter 7 Importance of the fine arts

**A/N: Hey everyone. Sorry, I know it's been a while. Summers are hectic. Don't really have much to say so let's just get to the story, shall we?**

**Thanks to my Beta Danna0724, for catching all my faux-pas and discrepancies.**

**All characters belong to S. Meyer, I've just moved them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 7 – The importance of the fine arts**

_**Close your eyes. Give me your hand, darling.  
Do you feel my heart beating? Do you understand? Do you feel the same?  
Am I only dreaming? Is this burning an eternal flame? **_**– Eternal Flame, The Bangles**

**BPOV**

I was in deep trouble.

I could feel the heavy pounding in my heart; my pulse racing anxiously. The bright red 'Warning!' lights blinked insistently in my mind, cautioning me that I was treading into perilous territory.

But what was I supposed to do, damn it? How much could a hot-blooded woman resist? God knows I'd been trying for weeks now.

Yet all those efforts were quickly going out the window right about now. I could see the proverbial white flag waving proud and true as I took in the scene before me: Edward kneeling down on one knee, a look of tender concern etched clearly across his strong features as he cradled Maddie gently in his arms. She clung to his neck with both hands as he wiped away her tears and murmured something in her ear I couldn't quite hear from where I sat with Alice and the rest of the Cullens. But whatever he said had the instant effect of turning her frown into a giggle and completely dissolving the tears which had been falling so insistently.

Watching them both interact with each other, I had to literally wrap my feet around the legs of the chair to keep from doing or saying something I thought I'd already decided I'd live to regret. If nothing else had broken my resolve to stay away from Edward, the undeniable affection between him and Maddie was about to do it.

Why was the scene before me affecting me so?

Oh Yeah. It was what Alice said a couple of weeks ago.

A couple of days after my birthday, I'd relented and taken Maddie to Alice's studio, Eclipse. Alice had us come after her last class ended, so that she could evaluate Maddie privately.

"Do you like The Nutcracker Maddie?" Alice asked her sweetly, kneeling down to her level.

"What's The Nutcrackuh Ally?" Maddie responded, using the term of endearment she'd come up with for Alice.

I looked around the dance studio while they did their thing. Alice's dance studio consisted of a large reception area, where parents could sit and wait comfortably while their children danced in the dance room. A large flat-screen hung on one wall, and it was from this TV that I watched Alice and Maddie in the other room, the dance room.

Two very large, framed pictures hung on either side of the door leading into the dance room; the first was an almost life size black and white portrait of Alice. She was in a beautiful white tutu, standing on the very tips of her toes. One arm was bent gracefully by her waist while the other was bent in a similar pose over her head; a small but sure smile played lightly on her beautiful face. I marveled at how easy, how simple she made it look to just stand on your toes like that. I remembered being a young child and attempting to do that, to stand on my toes for more than just a fraction of a second. I flinched, remembering the twisted ankle that accompanied that attempt.

The other picture was a large collage of Alice and all her different classes. All the girls smiled happily in their little tutus and buns.

My eyes wandered back to the picture of Alice; obviously taken during a major performance of her short, yet successful career as a ballerina. She looked so…_inspiring._ When I heard the soft sounds of Tchaikovsky's _Waltz of the Flowers_, I pulled my gaze away from the portrait to pay attention to what was happening on the large TV screen.

"She's a natural Bella," Alice had declared once they'd finished. She came and sat next to me in the studio's waiting-area and we both watched Maddie dancing happily by herself in the next room. "I can't believe you never told me she likes to dance!"

I chuckled. "It never came up," I said, but that wasn't entirely true. Of course I'd known about Alice's studio, but it wasn't something that fit into my budget. So when Alice had confirmed what Edward said the other day at the Seaport, that CCW employees received a half-off discount on tuition to her dance school, I'd hardly been able to believe it. I needed to give Maddie this, this little bit of childhood that shouldn't be denied to her. I couldn't help feeling guilty about everything she would miss out on because she was the child of a single parent.

"Well, anyhow, she shows a lot of promise. Especially for a four-year old. My four to six year old class meets for forty-five minutes on Wednesdays at 6:15 pm. Can you and Maddie make that?"

"I could try," I hedged skeptically. In the past few weeks, I'd come to realize train delays were more the rule than the exception in New York City. And then by the time I picked Maddie up from Sue's and got her to Alice's studio…

Alice regarded me thoughtfully for a few seconds. Abruptly, she reached for the phone in her purse and quickly began punching in digits. I opened my mouth to ask who she was calling but she put one small hand up to silence me. When her call went unanswered, she huffed indignantly and hung up. Quickly, her face brightened and she was punching in more numbers.

"Alice who are you-" I began, but she put one finger up to her lips. I sighed and waited.

This time, I heard a deep, smooth voice answer. "Edward, do you know where Jasper is?" Alice asked.

My eyes widened involuntarily at the mention of Edward's name.

I heard his loud retort. "What the fuck Alice, am I the one wearing his engagement ring? Why the hell would I know where he is?" I fought the smile that threatened at the corners of my mouth. I couldn't hear the rest, but by the way Alice rolled her eyes and pulled the phone away from her ear, I figured he wasn't being very polite.

"I'm trying to find him because Bella's here with me and I need to ask him something." Alice paused. I heard nothing but complete silence on the other line. She smirked and continued. "I just saw Maddie dance, and you're right, she does belong with me. God knows none of those other places that pass for ballet schools would do her justice," she snorted.

I heard Edward say something on the other line, but it was muffled.

Alice continued with a mischievous gleam in her eyes. "Yes, well, that's why I was trying to reach Jazz. We have a problem and I need his help."

My brows furrowed.

"The problem is that my Little Ballerina's class is Wednesdays at 6:15, which is cutting it kind of close for Bella. So I was going to ask Jazz if he'd mind driving in to work on Wednesdays, so he could drive Bella home and-"

I began protesting quickly. "Alice, please don't bother Jasper-"

But Alice put a finger up to silence me again, ignoring me. She grinned impishly from ear to ear as she listened intently to whatever Edward was saying on the other end.

"Hey, I hadn't even thought of _that_!" she cried. "Are you sure you don't mind? I know Bella wouldn't want to put you through any trouble…"

It took me half a second to figure out what Edward was probably suggesting on his end. "Alice, no!" I choked. She continued ignoring me.

"Well, if you're sure you wouldn't mind, that would certainly be the most logical solution," she shrugged. "Since you drive in to work every day anyway." She gave me a pointed glare. "And I'm sure Bella won't mind making the sacrifice to drive home with you once a week, since it's the _only_ way to make sure she'll make it to class on time."

How could I argue when she put it like that?

"What did you just do?" I screeched after she'd hung up.

"What?" she asked too innocently.

For the past couple of weeks, I'd been having a hard time focusing on Edward as nothing more than one of my bosses, and brother to the girl who was quickly becoming my best friend. It had seemed a given, at first, that that was all I could ever see him as. Especially with his reputation. But as the days went by, with his sweet, yet confusing emails, and the way his eyes lit up whenever our paths crossed in the office – making my heart skip a beat every time - and with how warm, and safe and _just right_ it had felt to walk and talk with him at the Seaport the other night….it was becoming increasingly difficult to remember why I needed to keep a professional distance.

And I was sure spending at least half an hour alone once a week in the confines of his warm car wouldn't help keep me focused.

"I…" – I closed my mouth, not knowing what to say – "It's just that…I…" – Alice watched me with an amused expression.

I took a deep breath. "Alice, I appreciate your help, _and_ Edward's offer, but I'm not sure it's such a good idea."

"Why not Bella? It's just a ride home."

How could I explain this without giving away my crazy crush? "Well, for one thing, it's completely out of his way. I don't want to bother-"

"Hah!" Alice choked. "Trust me, he's anything but bothered right now." She crossed her arms in front of her. "Try again."

"Well, what if…" – the thought of being in a car, alone, with Edward ran through my mind, startling me with a wave of not-entirely-unpleasant flutters in my stomach. Even more reason to try to get out of it.

"His girlfriend may not like him driving around-"

"Wait what girlfriend? Edward doesn't have a girlfriend!"

"Sure he does. Tanya Denali," I reminded her. "She was at Jasper's party. Tall, beautiful, strawberry blonde? Sort of bitchy? Ring a bell?"

Alice burst out laughing. "Please Bella. They've been over for months."

I pursed my lips and raised an eyebrow. "You mean, they're off again, for now."

Alice frowned. "No. I mean, they're off. _Forever_."

I stared at her dubiously.

"What? You don't believe me? Ask him yourself!" She pulled out her phone and started punching in numbers again.

"Alice, no!" I yelled, wrapping my hands around her cell phone and making her hang up. "Fine! I believe you! I believe you! But it's none of my business anyway."

She laughed at me before sighing and pursing her lips, staring at me thoughtfully. "Bella, Edward was a major dumb-ass for bringing Tanya to the party a few weeks ago, but there was nothing going on between them then, and there won't be anything going on between them ever again. I'm sure about that. His tastes have...improved significantly, you could say, in the past few weeks."

I stared at her, curious as a cat, but refused to ask what the heck that meant.

"Bella, Edward's been mixed up for a long time now. He and our father had a sort of falling out a few years ago, and I think Edward's way of dealing with it was just to…rebel against him in every way possible." She rolled her eyes. "Childish? Yeah, but that's a man for you." Her face softened. "I think though…that something happened _more recently_ that has him rethinking his ways, and wanting to get back on track." She shrugged. "He just needs some…encouragement that his feelings are returned."

I chuckled once. "Edward doesn't strike me as the sort of guy who needs encouragement."

"You'd be surprised. He may act all confident when the outcome doesn't really matter to him, but when it comes down to the real deal" – she gazed at me meaningfully – "apparently he's just as unsure as any guy would be."

It took me a second to figure out where Alice was going with this. "Alice," I began firmly, "I hope you're not thinking…" – the look on her face confirmed that that was _exactly_ what she was thinking.

I gave one hard, humorless chuckle. "Oh Alice. Trust me. You're way off the mark on this. I'm sure whatever Edward needs right now, it's not…" I couldn't even get myself to finish that thought. "And besides, I could never take that chance." I took a deep breath. Despite our growing friendship, there was still so much I hadn't been able to get myself to share with Alice.

"My ex-husband…he messed with my mind so badly …he was really good-looking and friendly and popular with women…and when we fell in love…I thought it was too good to be true." I laughed bitterly. "And of course, it was." I met her eyes, begging her to understand why this was so hard for me, not just talking about it, but letting anyone else in after that.

"Can you see why maybe I'd have a hard time trusting men again, especially someone like-" I cut off abruptly. No matter how close Alice and I had grown over the past few weeks, I didn't think she'd appreciate me finishing that sentence.

Alice frowned, biting her lip as if she wanted to ask more. "Bella, Edward's not like that," she said softly. I didn't answer because I didn't want to contradict her. "Look, I know from what's said about him and the stories you've probably read…" –she sighed- "I can understand how someone might be wary of trusting him, but Edward's fiercely loyal to those he really loves. And I know that once he finds the right girl, he would never-"

"What makes you think _I'm_ the right girl?" I cut in. "Alice," I said seriously, "I'm sure Edward's a great guy but…I'm not looking for anything like that right now." I said it with a finality that indicated I was ready to change the subject, and then looked away, because for some reason saying those words made my heart ache, and I didn't want her to see it.

Alice sighed, but she wasn't so easily deterred. "Someday," –she started carefully- "when you feel more comfortable, I'd like you to share with me exactly what happened between you and Maddie's father. I know it was more than just …a divorce." I looked away from her.

"You never talk about him, and Maddie never mentions him either." She made the comment more like a question, but the soft voice she spoke in let me know she wouldn't push if I wasn't ready.

Nevertheless I surprised myself by giving her more of an answer than I'd planned to, although it was still nowhere near the whole story. "It's hard for me to talk about him. Things between us didn't end on very friendly terms." I snorted, because that was the understatement of the year. "And Maddie…" - I looked at the flat screen again, where Maddie danced happily, oblivious to any discussions related to a man she'd barely known – "I'm pretty sure Maddie doesn't even remember him. He…made a very conscious decision to never be a part of her life." I tried to smile bravely, because even though I no longer loved her father, I couldn't help the sharp stab of pain I felt every time I remembered how little he cared for her.

Alice covered her mouth with one hand, obviously distressed by this little bit of information. She put her other hand on top of mine. I looked down and smiled gratefully.

She looked up at the flat screen at the little girl with dark hair and dark eyes, who'd captured her and her family's hearts in the short time they'd known her. "How could anyone that's ever known her not want to be a part of her life?"

I shrugged. "My ex-husband's the type of man who's used to getting everything he wants. Maddie…was just another novelty to him; someone, or something else he could say he had. But once he realized what it really meant to have a child…to be part of a family…"

"Then he bailed?"

I nodded. But there was much more to it than that, and I hoped Alice wouldn't ask, because as much as I liked her, and as much as I trusted her, I wasn't ready to share it…not yet. Nonetheless, I knew that as my friendship with her and the rest of her family continued to grow, I'd eventually have to explain a few things to them. Why I'd left the only family and friends I had back in Forks, and why Maddie carried my last name instead of her father's. I knew Edward had figured it out, that Swan was my maiden name, the other night at the Seaport. I'd seen it in his face after he caught Maddie before she fell in the river, when I'd called her by her full name. But thankfully, he'd been thoughtful enough not to ask about it.

And remembering that got me thinking about how thoughtful and respectful he was, and how – regardless of what he said otherwise – he _did_ seem to understand the value of privacy. Could Alice be right? Could it really be possible that his celebrity image was so off the mark from who the real Edward Cullen was? But those were dangerous thoughts I couldn't allow myself to consider.

Thankfully, Alice decided to change the subject, somewhat at least. Her eyes went to her portrait on the wall. She gazed at it wistfully. "When we have more time, I'd like to tell you about how my dance career ended, and my real life began."

Although we'd never discussed it, I vaguely recalled reading about it once; how some sort of accident had almost paralyzed her. It'd been months before she'd even been able to walk, much less dance again. And although she'd been fortunate enough to recover full use of her legs, the accident had ended her very promising career.

She turned back to me suddenly.

"Don't worry Bella, I'm fine," she assured me after reading the sadness in my face. "Way past fine actually. I couldn't imagine my life any differently than it is now," she said in a bright tone. She breathed in deeply. "But believe it or not, I know what it's like to be so totally disappointed in life that you don't even want to look any further for happiness."

I gazed at her incredulously. I couldn't even imagine an Alice that wasn't completely vivacious and giddy and totally in love with life.

"I know right?" she laughed, as if reading my thoughts. "Who would've thought?" She sighed, looking past me. "I wasn't looking for Jasper after _that_ either, but…" she trailed off and brought her eyes back to me.

"But what?" I finally asked.

Alice held my gaze intently. "But Bella, just because you're not looking for something…that doesn't mean it won't find _you_."

I didn't answer. My eyes moved to the large TV screen, where Maddie danced happily.

"Alice, even if…" -I trailed off- "It's not about what _I _want or what _I _need." I turned to face her. "I've got to focus on what Maddie needs."

Just then, Maddie bounded through the dance room doors and threw herself onto my lap. Alice picked a hand up and pushed back some loose strands from Maddie's little bun. Maddie raised a hand to Alice's cheek, tracing under her eye with one little finger.

"Ally, your eyes are the same coluh as Edwood's," Maddie breathed, with the sort of amazement only a four-year-old could convey over something like that.

Alice laughed. "That's because he's my brother silly. We're family."

Maddie's face took on a curious expression. She scrunched her eyebrows up thoughtfully. "I wish Edwood was my family too."

My eyes grew wide. They flew over to Alice, who looked as startled as I was, but she recovered herself quickly and smiled softly, as if –given a couple of seconds- Maddie's statement had made perfect sense to her.

"The thing is Bella," Alice whispered, pulling Maddie onto her lap, "I get the feeling Maddie's needs and yours are more similar than you realize."

Despite Alice's encouragements and Maddie's strange comment, I still felt I had to keep things between Edward and me strictly professional; work acquaintances at the very best. I was careful around the office not to stray too far, to keep to the safe area between my cubicle and Rose's office. I studiously avoided Starbucks, and the few times when Edward and I did cross each other's paths, I made sure our conversations were purely professional. And like the coward that I was, once I found out Edward would be attending, I'd bowed out of Sunday brunches, claiming I had too many weekend errands to run. I caught him giving me questioning looks around the office a couple of times, but things had been too hectic lately to allow for anything other than work.

The deadline for the Eversoft Presentation loomed imposingly around the office. It had been postponed a couple of times already by the Cartwrights, due to other business affairs they claimed they'd needed to take care of, which had frustrated Rosalie no end, but a firm date the first week in October had been set now. The pressure from the campaign was weighing on everyone, and Rose and Edward were at odds even more than usual, arguing about everything possible. Rosalie had been on a rampage for the past couple of weeks, her already erratic moods swinging even more wildly than usual. She came into the office every morning looking green and cranky, but by mid-morning, she was usually back to herself; just plain old cranky without the greenness.

Having been there myself once, I suspected the cause, but if she didn't offer the information, I wasn't going to ask. Rose and I were similar in that way; we both valued our privacy.

Thinking about privacy sent my thoughts straying to Edward. He'd sent me an email early in the morning asking me to wait for him in the lobby today; it was Maddie's first dance lesson.

So I waited with my nerves on edge. I watched as the elevators emptied and suit after suit walked out quickly, rushing to cars, trains and buses. I jumped when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

Lauren glared at me. I'd come to realize in the past few weeks I wasn't her favorite person in the office, a fact which didn't bother me in the least; she was far from being my favorite person too.

"Bella, Rosalie wants me to show you the latest sketches for the EverSoft campaign," she said in a clipped tone. "What time do you want to meet tomorrow?"

"Oh. Um, how about nine? We can meet in the-"

And then I saw Edward walk out of one of the elevators. His eyes found me immediately and in a few quick strides he was in front of me.

"Bella," he breathed. I thought I detected a note of relief, for some reason. "Sorry I made you wait. I got a phone call from one of the clients. Are you ready?"

He looked so beautiful and sweet, and I suddenly felt horrible. I hadn't been completely unfriendly or anything these past few days, but I'd definitely been avoiding him. And as I looked in his deep, green eyes, I couldn't for the life of me remember why that had seemed so important.

"Um, sure," I answered; more than just a little aware of Lauren staring a burning hole into the side of my face.

"And where are you two off to?" she asked, trying to keep her tone light, but I could hear the angry undertones.

Edward suddenly seemed to realize that she'd been standing there. He glanced at her – surprised but otherwise uninterested - before turning his green eyes back to me. He didn't answer her question.

"I'll wait for you outside Bella." His eyes flashed once between me and Lauren. "Don't take too long; we don't want to hit too much rush-hour traffic," he warned with his crooked smile, before walking away.

Lauren glared at me silently. She raised an eyebrow as if waiting for me to say something. When she realized I wasn't going to volunteer any information, she huffed indignantly, "Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow at nine then Bella." She snorted. "Have a _great_ night," she purred and walked away quickly, her heels clicking on the marble lobby floors.

The ride with Edward was made even more awkward after the scene with Lauren. Images of Edward and Lauren in the conference room invaded my mind; they were up against the wall, clawing at each other and breathing hard while they undid each other's clothes; on the table, Lauren moaning quietly while Edward hitched her skirt up higher. Ugh! I cringed and shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

"Everything okay?" Edward asked, glancing at me sideways.

"Sure," I lied, feeling strangely irritated with him.

Awkward silence.

"So, are you ready for the Cartwright's?" Edward broke in.

"Almost."

"Are you nervous…about the meeting, I mean?"

"No."

"Bella, did I do something to upset you?" Edward asked suddenly.

"No, of course not," I replied quickly, feeling shame color my face. He was doing me a huge favor by going out of his way to take me home so that Maddie wouldn't be late to her dance class, and I was making him uncomfortable in his own car. And anyway, I reminded myself for the thousandth time, Edward and his love life were none of my business.

"I…it wasn't you." I shook my head quickly.

He was silent for a few seconds. "Did…did Lauren say something to upset you just now?"

And just like that, he'd hit the nail on the head. I hesitated for just a split second too long before answering. "No."

Edward mumbled something under his breath. He leaned back in his seat, pursing his lips.

"Bella" -he began, as we took the ramp onto the Brooklyn Bridge- "the problem with Lauren is that, while she has her moments of inspiration, she tends to lose focus of what she's at CCW for. Lucky for her, she usually knows how to keep the clients satisfied; at least she used to. Behind conference room doors, she's usually a completely different person."

He seemed to realize what he'd said as soon as the words were out; evidenced by the way his face contorted in horror. But my own mouth was forming words before I could stop them.

"Yeah, I'm sure you'd know exactly what she's like behind those doors."

I thought I felt the car swerve slightly, and somewhere nearby, a horn blared angrily. I felt Edward regain control of the car, but my eyes were already closed tightly while I prayed to our dear Lord in heaven that he take me from here right now and never make me face this man again.

I opened one eye carefully. I was still in the car.

"Oh God, Edward. I'm so sorry. That was so out of line. I'm so, so-"

"No, no, Bella. Don't apologize." He chuckled, looking slightly embarrassed. Drawing in a deep breath, he said, "Wow. I'm actually kind of…glad that's finally out in the open."

I gave him a puzzled look.

"Ever since that day…I've wondered how much you saw."

I laughed nervously. "Not as much as you probably did, thank God."

He looked shocked and slightly mortified again, until he glanced over at me and saw me fighting a chortle. His face relaxed, although he still looked embarrassed.

"You know what I mean," he smirked. I was surprised to see his cheeks appeared to be sort of flushed. Edward Cullen, man-whore extraordinaire, was blushing? "Anyway, I can imagine what that must've looked like," he continued.

I raised one eyebrow. "What it must've looked like? Are you trying to say it wasn't what it looked like?"

He swallowed thickly before answering. "It wasn't…I mean we didn't…I mean…" He sighed heavily and picked up one hand and ran it through his hair. "What I'm trying to say is, nothing _really_ happened," he said finally.

"Edward, please. You don't need to tell me about that," I said quickly. I needed to end this conversation and the unwanted images it was conjuring. "It's none of my business. I'm really sorry I said anything. It just…popped out. Please, can we just forget it?" I begged.

He gave me a sideways glance before answering. "Okay, but can I just add one thing before we drop it?"

"Sure," I mumbled.

Edward sighed. "Remember what I told you the other day? At the Seaport? About wanting to be someone that can hang out with you and Maddie without having to wear a disguise, or hide behind any sort of mask?"

"Yes." Of course I remembered. Those words had kept me up all night, trying to figure out what they'd meant.

"I won't deny I've done lots of…things I'm ashamed of. And I'll readily admit to any of them. I'm not a hypocrite, or a liar Bella. So when I say nothing happened, I hope you believe me." He suddenly turned his eyes and locked me into his gaze intently. "Nothing happened."

"Okay, fine. I believe you." I said quickly. "Will you please keep your eyes on the road now?"

He chuckled.

"Now can we drop it? I'm about to die of embarrassment here," I informed him.

He laughed. "Hey, you started it."

I flushed with embarrassment and turned away from him.

He chuckled again. "Alright, let's drop it."

I sighed in relief. "Thank you."

We were silent for a while as we made our way through Brooklyn Heights. The tension in the air felt thick and uncomfortable again. Edward sped down Court Street going much faster than the allotted thirty five mile an hour speed limit. The light at the intersection turned yellow, and just as I expected him to slow down and come to a stop, he sped up and went through the light as it went from yellow to red.

"Man, Alice wasn't kidding. You really do drive like a maniac."

Edward smirked, but his face looked smug, as if I'd just complimented him. Nevertheless, he said "Alice talks a lot of crap. I hope you've realized that by now." Underneath his words though, I could detect a deep fondness for his annoying little sister.

I chuckled. "Well, as much as I like her, I have noticed…" I trailed off, smiling sheepishly.

Edward laughed really loud, making me smile wider. The sound of his laughter seemed to fill the entire car and sent an unexplainable feeling of comfort through me, like a warm breeze caressing my skin on an early fall day.

"Please don't tell her I said that," I asked.

He turned and winked at me. "Don't worry, your secret's safe with me." I had to look away to keep my heart rate under control.

He seemed to get thoughtful all of a sudden. "She does seem to have her uses sometimes though," he finally said, and though his voice sounded playful, there was something else in it.

"Like what?" I asked.

He glanced at me for a couple of seconds; I thought I saw something like hope in his eyes.

"Ever since we were kids, she's annoyed the hell out of me and Emmett with her predictions."

I gave him a puzzled look. He tried to explain further. "She'd say things like, 'Emmett, I'm warning you, if you try to climb that tree, you're going to fall off and twist an ankle.' And sure enough, Em ignored her and climbed the tree, and not only did he fall off, he ended up with a twisted ankle. Or she'd say something like, 'Edward, leave the neighbor's dog alone or one of these days he's going to bite your ass and you won't be able to sit down for weeks', and sure enough, the damn dog bit my ass the next day. Hurt for weeks. Or 'Edward, don't even think of trying to kiss Jen Butler, 'cause you'll just end up with a big slap mark across your face. And sure enough-"

"Hold, on. I think I see a pattern here," I cut in. "Jen Butler slapped you, didn't she?" I smiled.

"Had five finger marks across my face for days. It didn't exactly make me popular with the rest of the girls, if you know what I mean."

"It doesn't seem to have affected you in the long run," I ribbed.

He laughed, shaking his head.

When our laughter died down, he added, "Let's just say my family and I stopped betting against Alice a long time ago."

I turned back to my window thoughtfully, going through the conversation she and I had had at her studio a few days ago. I suddenly felt a jolt of electricity go through me, and turned to find Edward looking at me. This time though, it was more than just a quick glance; his entire body was angled towards me, and for a second, I panicked, thinking that if he didn't turn back to the road, Maddie would be left an orphan.

Then I realized we were already parked in front of Sue's brownstone. I looked at the clock on the windshield. It was only 5:35 – the man sure drove like a maniac, but I'd have plenty of time to get Maddie to class. When I turned back to Edward, he was still gazing at me with a thoughtful expression.

"Bella, have you ever felt like…something was missing, and you hadn't even realized it until…until you found it?"

"That's how I felt when I had Maddie." I smiled, remembering the feel of her tiny, warm body in my arms for the first time.

Edward grinned, his perfect teeth dazzling me with their snowy brilliance. I blinked a couple of times. He sat back suddenly, his eyes moving past me as if picturing something. "Yeah, I can see how that moment would be like finding a missing part of yourself."

I swallowed nervously, wondering what Edward was thinking about. He turned his eyes back to me and I froze, holding my breath. His eyes were so intense, so determined, all of a sudden. His scorching eyes searched mine, as if asking a silent question. I saw him draw in a deep breath, as if bracing himself to do or say something extremely important, something that would somehow change everything. "Bella…" he breathed, and slowly moved in closer. I held my breath, terrified all of a sudden, because although I thought I knew what was coming, I still wasn't sure how to respond to it.

Something in his expression shifted, and suddenly he was leaning back; the determination gone out of his eyes. "So Alice says I'm a crazy driver?" he asked finally in an unsure voice, looking as if he were trying to compose himself. "She's one to talk," he scowled. He sounded frustrated.

Confused by the sudden shift in the atmosphere, it took me a second longer to respond. Slowly, I smiled. What was going on with me? What had I thought was about to happen?

"I'm sure she was just joking. I mean, anyone can see you've got obvious skills behind the wheel."

He chuckled smugly again, but there was something off about it.

"A piece of advice though," I continued, trying to relieve the tension in the air, "for future reference, yellow means slow down, not speed up."

"I'll try to remember that," he laughed, but it sounded shaky; nervous. "Especially when you're in the car with me."

We both turned away, facing the windshield, but neither one made any effort to get out of the car.

And I was aware of how small the space in this car was, how quiet it was in here; the only sounds were those of our breathing. I bit my lip, aware of the way we'd both unconsciously turned towards each other again, of the intoxicating scent floating off of him; not some strong, overpowering cologne meant to charm the female population, like Maddie's dad liked to wear. Edward's scent was clean; soap and fabric softener and…and something else I couldn't quite identify, something strong and musky and unique and…_entirely Edward. _

I could feel the electric charge in the small, confined space, drawing me to him like a magnet drawn to its other half. But that was a crazy though, wasn't it? And while I thought these things, my rational side commanded me to back up, but my quickening heart beat and the blood racing through my veins said something completely different.

A loud horn blared from a yellow cab just then, at a stop right outside my window. The angry sound made me jump and broke the overwhelming tension that had just been threatening to undo my tenuous control.

I moved away, straightening myself out. My movements seemed to break the spell, the electric charge that had invaded Edward's car. I thought I heard him let out a deep breath, and appearing to realize the angle of his body at the same time, he moved back too, straightening out and staring out the front windshield again. He ran his hand through his hair.

My mind cleared enough for me to speak, I knew I had to get out of here, and fast. "If we're late to Alice's class, there's going to be hell to pay," I joked in an unintentionally husky voice.

It took Edward a few moments to answer. Finally he said, "You think you're joking. Believe me, if there's one thing that sister of mine hates is lateness." I thought I detected a note of disappointment in his voice. "We'd better hurry," he added, putting a hand on the door handle, but making no attempt to actually open the door.

"Alice isn't that bad," I said, putting a hand on my own door handle. "You're lucky to have the family you do," I added.

I remembered what Alice had hinted at the other day, that Edward and his father, Carlisle, didn't have the best relationship. The thought made me sad, both because I couldn't imagine not being on good terms with Charlie, and because, the few times I'd met Carlisle, I'd genuinely liked him. I thought he seemed very similar to Edward. I couldn't imagine what could've happened between them.

Edward looked down at his lap. "I suppose they're not too bad" - he agreed reluctantly - "though they all have a hard time minding their own business."

I chuckled. "It's hard to reason with well-meaning people who have a hard time accepting your decisions."

He smiled knowingly. "I take it you've met my father?"

I narrowed my eyes, puzzled and aware that I'd unwittingly hit upon a sore subject. "Actually, I was more thinking of a…friend of mine." I thought of Jake. What would he think if knew where I was right at this minute? He'd be extremely pissed off, that was for sure. "He means well…but he's very protective of Maddie and me. He wasn't too happy when we moved over here."

Edward's demeanor shifted. His face grew serious. "Gave you a hard time, did he?"

"A bit," I admitted. I smiled wistfully remembering the tantrum Jake had thrown when I'd told him I'd been hired by CCW and was moving to New York City.

"But it's only because he worries about us. He's not too comfortable with the idea of Maddie and I being all alone in this big bad city," I joked. "I swear, if I had a penny for every time he quotes me the crime rate statistics of Brooklyn versus Forks-" I laughed, glancing sideways at Edward and expecting to see that wonderfully wry smile on his face.

But he wasn't smiling. His jaw was tight, and his whole body seemed stiff.

"Well you should tell Jake" –he spit out 'Jake' almost as if it were a curse – "that you're _not _alone. You've got Alice, and Rose and Esme, and…" –he met my eyes- "and you're not alone," he almost growled.

I gave him a startled look; his eyes were suddenly very dark. "How did you know I was talking about Jake?"

That seemed to catch him by surprise. "Didn't you say Jake?"

"No, I'm pretty sure I didn't."

"Oh." He ran a hand through his hair; a gesture I was beginning to realize meant he was nervous for some reason. "Well I guess it's because you got the same look talking about him now that you did when you mentioned him at the Seaport the other day. Some far-away look, like your thoughts were suddenly thousands of miles away."

"Oh." I wasn't sure what that meant.

Edward's eyes narrowed. He caught my gaze and stared at me like he was trying to read something.

"Well, _Jake_ sounds like a dumb-ass. And he doesn't sound like much of a friend if he can't accept your decisions."

Instinctively, I felt my defenses go up.

"No. Jake is _not_ a dumb-ass. He's a great guy, and a great friend. I owe him…I owe him a lot," I defended him. "He's been there for me. That level of friendship, of commitment to another friend…well, I guess it's not easy to understand."

Edward went still. I was suddenly aware that his breathing seemed louder, more labored. I suddenly realized that as comfortable as I felt talking with Edward, I didn't feel comfortable talking to him about Jake.

"I _can_ understand friendship Bella. And commitment. " His voice was cool and impassive.

"No. I wasn't implying that…" I sighed, feeling sick all of a sudden. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get defensive like that. It's just that…well I guess I'm just as protective of Jake as he is of me. We've been through a lot together, and he's stuck by me through some crazy times. At the expense of his own…" I looked away, watching as the street lamps turned on with the fading of the setting sun. I was talking too much. "Well, let's just say he's sacrificed a lot for me, and he doesn't deserve anyone thinking less than the best of him."

I looked back at Edward. His face was blank; unreadable, but his eyes still seemed to search mine for something. He gazed at me for a moment longer before drawing a deep breath. This time, he did open the car door. "You'd better go get Maddie before we're really late," I heard him mumble.

Not entirely sure of what had just happened, I started to get out of the car, when I felt a strong, warm hand on my arm. I stopped just short of gasping as Edward's touch filled me with an undeniable warmth that traveled all the way down to my toes.

I turned back to face him. He looked upset and his eyes were full of remorse. "Hey," he said, tightening his grip on my arm. "I'm sorry." His voice was apologetic. "I shouldn't have said those things about your friend Jake. It sounds like he's been…extremely good to you, and I'm…glad you have someone like him in your life."

I smiled gently. "It's alright Edward. And I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to imply you…look, I want you to know I really appreciate you helping me out like this. I know it's taking you out of your way, and there are probably better things you could be doing right now-"

He snorted and shook his head. "Bella, believe me when I say there's _nothing_ better I could be doing right now." He held my gaze, and I noticed that the intensity had returned. He hadn't let go of my arm yet, and although I was wearing a sweater - the late September days having turned colder - I thought I felt his thumb caressing my arm ever so lightly. I was afraid to look down to confirm it.

"I want you to know something too Bella. In case you really haven't figured it out already." He paused, and when he opened his mouth to speak again, he seemed to change his mind about what he was about to say. "You really aren't alone here. Even though we've only known you and Maddie for a short time…my family and I, we're _all_ here for you, when you need us." He focused on me intently, trying to convey the truth of his words through his gaze.

"Thanks Edward. That means a lot. Your family's been very kind to me." We sat there completely still for a few more moments, locked in each other's gaze.

"I'd better go get Maddie," I said suddenly.

Edward exhaled. "Yeah, you probably should."

I went in to get Maddie from Sue's, while Edward waited outside. Sue had Maddie ready with her brand new pink leotard and tutu on and her hair done up in a nice, neat bun. Maddie was so excited to be going to her first real dance class that she looked like a little jumping bean ready to explode.

"Guess who's waiting outside?" I asked her as I opened the door to the street.

"Who mommy?" she asked happily as she skipped through the door. As soon as she saw Edward, she ran to him excitedly.

"Edwood!"

Edward's eyes lit up when he saw Maddie, and whatever had caused his strange shift in attitude a few minutes ago suddenly disappeared. He picked her up and twirled her around while she giggled happily in his arms. And once again, I was struck by the inexplicable awe in both their eyes as they gazed at each other.

"Edwood, are you going to see me dance today?" Maddie asked hopefully.

"Of course!" Edward replied. "How could I miss your first day of dance lessons?"

The blood drained from my face for a second, as I realized those were words I would've once expected another man to utter. But Maddie giggled happily again. I watched them, as puzzled as always by their peculiar reaction to one another, before suddenly remembering I'd forgotten to borrow a car seat from Sue.

"Maddie, do you want to come in with me, or do you want to wait out here with Edward while I run in and borrow Sue's car seat?" I asked the little girl who was barely paying me any mind at the moment.

Before Maddie could answer – and probably tell me to leave her alone with her superhero – Edward turned to me.

"Um, Bella, you don't need to borrow a car seat." His eyes moved to the back seat of his car. I followed his gaze to find a shiny, black expensive looking car seat tethered tightly in the back.

"You bought a car seat?" I asked incredulously.

His hand, the one that Maddie wasn't holding on to, moved up to his hair again.

"No, no. I…uh borrowed one. From a friend who doesn't need it anymore." My eyes trailed back to the brand-new looking car seat. I lifted an eyebrow at him.

"We'd better go," he suddenly insisted, opening the car door for Maddie to climb in and turning away from me. I bit my lip, not completely convinced but lacking any proof.

Alice's studio was just a few blocks away, and we arrived with a few minutes to spare.

"You don't have to stay," I told Edward when he started to walk into Alice's studio with us. The studio was crowded, about a dozen little girls and a couple of boys around Maddie's age all laughed and played while they waited for the current class to end and their class to start.

"Of course I'm staying," Edward answered, as if I'd just suggested something ridiculous. "Didn't I just tell Maddie I would?"

"Oh." I was about to say something else, when a flash of perfect blond hair caught my eye, and I looked beyond the little girls and their parents to see Rosalie and Emmett sitting in the waiting area. Emmett was watching the crowd of screeching little girls with amusement, while Rose looked more than a little overwhelmed by the entire scene. They saw us walk in and walked over to us.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked.

Rosalie smiled coyly. "Alice told us Maddie was starting her dance lessons today, and we thought we'd stop by and say hi."

I jerked my head back, surprised. Were the mommy instincts starting to kick in early for Rose?

"Yeah, we thought we'd come by and check out the little ballerina." Emmett added, smiling down at Maddie and ruffling the top of her head with his big hand. Maddie giggled.

"Hey man. Be careful. You're gonna take her head off with that big bear paw of yours." Edward snapped at his brother. He stood protectively behind her.

Emmett guffawed loudly, giving Edward a humorous glare. "Take it easy bro," he laughed. Edward glared at him. I thought I heard him mumble something about messing up her bun too.

"Well," Rose said in a nervous voice. "So this is what a room full of five-year-olds is like."

I could see the terror in her eyes. I suppressed a laugh. "You get used to it," I tried to comfort her vaguely.

"I guess you do," she answered just as vaguely, though she didn't sound too convinced.

"Bella! Maddie!" I suddenly heard from behind. When I turned around, Esme was standing there, smiling at me. Edward turned to give his mom a quick peck on the cheek, but there was absolutely no surprise on his face at seeing her there.

"Ms. Esme!" Maddie cried, letting go of Edward's hand for the first time since we'd gotten out of the car to hug Esme.

Esme knelt down to hug Maddie. When she looked up at me, I gave her a confused look. "Esme, what are you-" Before I could finish my sentence, I saw Jasper open the door to the studio, strolling in quickly. His eyes reached us and he walked over to where we stood.

"Did I make it?" he asked hurriedly.

"Make it to what?" I asked, thoroughly confused now.

"Maddie's class hasn't started yet, has it?"

"Did you come to see Maddie too?"

"'Course," he answered. "Can't let the little lady start her first dance class without our support," he smiled.

"And you too Esme?"

Esme stood up to face me. "Of course Bella," she answered, in the same tone Edward had used when I'd asked him if he was staying. Her eyes quickly moved between Edward and Maddie, and I saw a knowing smile grace her lips before returning to me. "Edward happened to mention that Maddie was starting dance lessons today, and I couldn't resist coming to see her. Carlisle would've come to, but he's at the hospital tonight. I hope you don't mind we've come," she added quickly, a small frown threatening on her forehead.

"No." I said quickly. "No, of course I don't mind. I'm just a bit…surprised to see you all," I said honestly.

Surprised was an understatement. I was thoroughly shocked to see the entire Cullen clan crowded into Alice's dance studio, all here to see Maddie during her first dance class. I felt a strong tug at my heart, a feeling of closeness and of belonging, something I hadn't felt since the day my dad, Sue Clearwater, and Jake stood with me at Sea-Tac Airport, waiting to see me off, even though they didn't completely agree with what I was doing. Because that's what family did; they offered support and encouragement.

Strangely, that's what this felt like.

Almost as if he'd read my mind, Edward leaned into me and whispered, "See. I told you." I turned to him, and his green eyes were so, so close, and I felt his hand graze mine, sending wonderful shivers up my spine. He smiled and moved towards my ear again. "You and Maddie aren't alone."

That was the first time I truly felt at peace with my decision to move to this city.

And that was also when I realized I was in more than serious danger of losing my heart to Edward.

So for the next couple of Wednesdays, Edward drove me home to Brooklyn to pick up Maddie. Then we'd drive to the studio with Maddie safely buckled into her _borrowed_ top-of-the-line car seat, where the rest of his family waited, all crowded into the waiting area. We'd all sit and talk and watch Alice and Maddie on the flat screen TV, and then after class Edward would have a few pizza pies delivered to the studio, -because Maddie liked pizza- and we'd all sit on the chairs and talk and eat until it was time to go home, and Edward would drive me and Maddie home, even though it was just a few blocks.

The electric energy ever-present in the car as we drove home from the office never left, although I made sure to keep my body angled away from him after that first day. It was too dangerous. I didn't trust myself. I knew it would take very little, almost nothing, for me to give in to the overwhelming charge I constantly felt between us.

The hardest part of those nights would be when we'd get home; those first few seconds, as I unbuckled Maddie and Edward waited patiently behind me to say bye, were always so awkward. The desire to invite him up for just a cup of coffee or something was almost overwhelming. But it was my inability to define that _something_ that kept the words from coming out of my mouth. So instead I'd mumble a quick thanks and see you tomorrow, and he'd smile and say bye to us before getting back in his car.

But I couldn't deny to myself anymore that Wednesday had become my favorite day of the week. I couldn't deny the almost palpable charge of energy present whenever Edward and I were together. But I'd promised myself I wouldn't take this risk again. I couldn't. Not with Maddie to take care of now.

No. I needed to think of Maddie. Of what she needed. It didn't matter that I hadn't felt drawn to someone as much as I felt drawn to Edward in years. Or if I were being honest with myself, _ever_. What mattered now were Maddie's needs. I was decided.

And then, about three weeks into our strange arrangement, Maddie fell. One second, she was skipping happily around Alice's dance studio. Everyone else had left and the only ones there were Maddie, myself and the Cullens. We were all talking and eating our pizza while Maddie played and danced around the studio. Until she tripped over how own two little feet (I suppose even she couldn't escape the Swan curse entirely) and ripped her tights and started crying. I got up to go to her but somehow, Edward beat me to it.

"I wipped my pwitty pink tights," she bawled into Edwards shoulder, wetting his shirt with her tears and runny nose. "They wuh all spahkly and shiny, and now I bwoke them."

Edward looked at her with a pained expression, as if he were about to cry too. "Please don't cry princess. I'll get you another pair of tights. A dozen of them. With sparkles and glitter and unicorns. They'll be the prettiest tights ever made. You'll see." His voice was pleading. "Alice, where can I get more tights?" he demanded, keeping his eyes on Maddie and stroking her hair gently.

"Edward, its past seven. All the stores around here are closed," Alice answered with amusement. I looked over at her and her eyes were twinkling. I suddenly remembered the incident with Jasper and the unanswered phone call. If Maddie weren't four years old and my daughter, I would've sworn they planned this somehow.

Edward mumbled something under his breath about hating Brooklyn. "I'll get them first thing tomorrow morning. I promise," Edward murmured softly to Maddie. "And I'll send them home with your mommy."

Maddie stopped crying for a second and turned to whisper something in Edward's ear. His eyes moved to me and he smiled softly before turning to whisper something back in her ear. She giggled happily, completely forgetting her torn tights and bounding off his knee to continue her skipping.

I looked back at Alice. The gleam in her eyes was pure triumph. '_Never bet against Alice.'_

'_The thing is Bella_,' Alice had said, '_I get the feeling Maddie's needs and yours are more similar than you realize.'_

That night, after I'd unbuckled Maddie from her car seat, I turned around and let them say their goodbyes.

"Bye Edwood!" Maddie exclaimed, taking hold of Edward's hand.

Edward smiled softly and raised his other hand to her cheek, pinching it very gently. "Good night sweet Maddie. Sleep Tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite." Maddie giggled and skipped to the door of the building.

I looked up at Edward, feeling the familiar fluttering in my stomach, only intensified more now that I knew the fight was going out of me.

"Good night Edward," I murmured quietly, expecting nothing more than the usual good-bye we gave each other.

But there must've been something in my voice, or maybe in the way I was looking at him. Maybe, knowing that I was losing the battle, I'd let down my careful guard in the way I looked at him; the way I spoke to him.

His eyes widened, and he stared at me with a slightly confused and astonished look before letting his lips curl into that wonderful crooked grin of his. But there was something different in his smile too, something that spoke of relief and quiet understanding.

He took a deep breath. "Good night sweet Bella. Sleep well. See you tomorrow?" His voice sounded hopeful. He already knew we'd see each other tomorrow at work, but his question held more to it than the obvious meaning.

And for the first time in a long time, I wasn't afraid to let my feelings show.

"Yes, Edward. I'll see you tomorrow."

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**A/N: Alright guys. Thoughts, comments? Reviews make my day! **

**Also, for those of you waiting for the last two chappies of IWBAIINE, they are in production, I promise!**


	9. Chapter 8 A nondescript morning in NYC

**A/N: There will be references to court matters in this chapter. Please note that I am in no way, shape or form an expert in these matters. In the interest of this story, I've done **_**some**_** research on the subject, but we're talking half-an-hour or so here. So please forgive me if anyone finds anything glaringly wrong in the next few chapters. **

**A side note: So far, I've tried to alternate the POV in this story every chapter. But for the next couple of chapters, it will be in Edward's POV. Hope you guys don't mind.**

**Thanks to my Beta Danna0724, for reviewing this chappy here.**

**All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 8 – A Nondescript Morning in NYC**

**EPOV**

**A few days ago:**

"Ha!" Emmett yelled. "I caught something!" His big arms flexed as he reeled in his line and fought with the sea creature he'd caught, pulling it in with a huge grin on his face. Our father gave him a congratulatory pat on the back before turning his attention back to his own line.

"Lucky bastard," I heard Jasper growl from his other side, scowling at his line, which hadn't moved all morning.

I snorted and turned back to watch my own unmoving fishing rod. Like Jasper, I hadn't caught a thing all morning. But I wasn't worried. I had more important things on my mind.

It was early October. The days were getting shorter, and the mornings were darker and definitely cooler. This was probably the last time this year we'd be taking the yacht out for our fishing expeditions. The women in the family had all bowed out this morning, complaining of the cold sea air in the Long Island Sound this time of year. That suited me just fine; I preferred our fishing trips to be just us guys. Well, except for lately. There was a certain brunette I would've loved to see sitting next to me on our family's yacht, keeping me company while I waited for the fish to take the bait.

I sighed, looking around the large boat. Emmett, Jasper and my father all remained forward, while Uncle Aro and me had taken up our position aft of the boat. Carlisle, as usual, wasn't too happy with me this morning.

"So what'd you do to piss off your dad now?" Uncle Aro, Esme's younger brother, asked with a knowing smile.

I shrugged. "I purchased another car."

"Another one?" Uncle Aro chuckled. "What? Are you trying to catch up to Jay Leno or something?"

"I bought a Volvo. I need something safe and dependable to drive." I waved a frustrated hand in Carlisle's direction. "_He's_ always talking about how I need to be more responsible. I thought he would've been happy."

Uncle Aro frowned, a curious smile on his face. "Since when are you worried about safety and dependability?"

An image of Bella sitting next to me in the Audi, and Maddie asleep in the back seat, popped into my head.

"Since I've discovered there are things in this world worth protecting."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Uncle Aro raise an eyebrow.

After a pause he asked, "So Vicki tells me you and Tanya are still 'off-again'?"

I smirked. My cousin Vicki was unfortunately one of Tanya's good friends. "Tanya and I are off, _period_."

"I'm sure _that_ news at least should make your dad happy."

"Like the rest of the National Enquirer reading world, he chooses to believe the break up's only temporary."

"Well, in that case, I guess time will have to tell."

Uncle Aro had always served as a mediator between my dad and me, especially in the months following my withdrawal from med school. As a corporate lawyer, he'd completely understood my interest in the business world. Unlike my father, who'd seen it as a personal betrayal to the proud line of Cullen doctors. A sharp, powerful businessman, Uncle Aro wasn't the worst role model; he was also a good man at heart. But, much to my father's chagrin, he had a knack for fast cars and fast women. And the closer I'd grown to Uncle Aro, the more I'd imitated his behavior.

"So who's the lucky woman, or maybe I should say women, keeping you company these days Edward?" Uncle Aro asked.

Again, Bella's creamy face popped into my mind, but I just smiled and shook my head in response.

I'd always had an easy time talking to Uncle Aro about women; he'd been divorced three times, so he definitely had experience. And Lord knows I couldn't talk to my father about the women I dated.

But I couldn't see myself discussing Bella with my uncle. For one thing, it wasn't as if she and I were dating anyway. Despite the indescribable pull I felt towards her - and at times I could've sworn she might have felt towards me - Bella always made sure to keep enough distance between us to leave no doubt that – regardless of what she may or may not have felt – what she _wanted_ was nothing more than friendship. So there was nothing to tell, apart from a one-sided obsession on my part.

For the first time in a long time, I found myself wishing things between Carlisle and I were different, and that it was easier for me to talk to _him._ I let out a frustrated sigh.

Uncle Aro knew me too well.

"Come on, godson," he laughed, clapping me on the back. "It's obvious some woman's got your boxers in a knot. You expect me to believe there's no action in your corner right now?"

I chuckled, turning my eyes to the swelling waves of the Long Island Sound. "There isn't."

"Edward, reading people is how I make the big bucks. Come on, tell me all about her."

I shook my head again. "I told you uncle, there's nothing to tell."

He smirked and changed the subject, for now at least. "So how's the agency going then? Emmett and Jasper were telling me you guys have a big presentation in a couple of weeks."

"We're building a new campaign for one of our biggest clients. Our new Graphic Designer, Isabella Swan" – I cringed internally at the way my voice quivered on her name – "came up with this great idea for a new campaign, and the clients jumped on it."

Aro was quiet for a few seconds.

"Sounds great," he finally said. "Tell me more about her…idea."

I started telling him about the Baby's Bottom Campaign, when his cell phone went off. He pulled it out of his jacket with a groan.

"God-damned office! Don't they know it's Sunday?" He pressed the send button and barked into the phone, "Aro Volturi!"

With Uncle Aro's attention on his call, my mind drifted, or rather, re-drifted to Bella.

"Yeah, it's a great idea," I continued, talking to myself. I stared out into the ocean. "But really, it's no surprise. She's the smartest friggin' woman I've ever met. And she's really talented too. Her designs are better than any one's I've ever seen."

I snuck a glance at Uncle Aro. He was growling something about anti-trust regulations. Assured that he was safely occupied, I continued.

"She's really beautiful too. And she's got the sweetest little girl. And she's got these eyes…they both do actually. But Bella's eyes…they're like deep pools of chocolate. I mean, they make you want to swim in them. And when you look into them, man, it's like you can get lost in there forever, like she's looking right into your soul. But you don't care; you _want _her to see everything inside you. Everything you've never even thought of showing anyone else. Shit you didn't even know was in there."

Uncle Aro's phone conversation started winding down. I cleared my throat and stopped my ramblings.

With a scowl on his face, he turned off his phone and turned to me. "Just my god-damned luck we'd get reception in the middle of the fucking Sound. These vultures won't even leave me alone on Sundays."

"Like you said," I reminded him, "that's how you make the big bucks."

He snorted. "Yeah, yeah." His face suddenly brightened. "Speaking of big bucks, a week from Thursday is the company charity auction. You're coming aren't you?"

I hadn't missed one of my uncle's charity auctions in years. I was about to say yes, when I remembered something.

"I'm not sure that'd be such a great idea Uncle Aro. There might be some people there it'd be better if I didn't bump into right now."

As one of Vicki's closest friends, Tanya would probably be at the auction. Despite the not so pleasant way she and I had left things last time we saw each other, she'd started calling me again. I ignored her phone calls and erased her messages without listening to them. But Tanya was a crazy witch. If she saw me at the Charity Auction, she'd try to talk to me again, and I'd have a hard time not cursing the shit out of her. Despite the fact that, in the past few years, I'd ignored lots of the lessons I'd been taught as a kid, I knew better than to embarrass a woman in public. It would be better to just avoid her for now.

Uncle Aro gave me a quizzical look. Then he nodded as if a light bulb had gone off. "Ah, you mean Tanya. Edward, son, don't tell me you're going to let a woman chase you out of your own playground?"

I shrugged. It wasn't as if she was keeping me away from anything I particularly missed.

"Come on," he insisted. "You never miss these. Vicki's got more friends she can introduce you to."

I tried to suppress a scowl. Vicki and her friends were just varied versions of Tanya.

"Or, you can bring your new graphic designer friend. I'm sure she'd be impressed to see how generous you are, not just with yourself and your cars, but with those less fortunate."

My eyes flashed to him in surprise.

He chuckled. "Edward, I'm not one of the top corporate lawyers in the country for nothing. It's my job to see all and hear all, even if I do seem to be occupied with other things. And then after I see it and hear it, it's my job to put two and two together."

"It's…it's not like that. She hasn't seen the car yet; it won't be ready until next week. And things like that don't impress her anyway. That's not why I bought it."

"Oh come on," he smirked. "All girls are impressed by money and cars. Some just hide it better than others." It was comments like these that irritated my father, and I suspected, why my uncle, although decent deep down, still hadn't found the right woman.

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter anyway. We're just friends." I felt a sharp pang of disappointment suddenly.

My uncle stared at me. "Whatever you say Edward, but you know if you want to talk, I'm here."

I didn't answer. My uncle's eyes flashed towards my father before coming back to me. "And Edward, you can talk to your father too, you know."

I smirked. "Thanks unc."

**Present Day**

I got off the escalator on the ninth floor of Barney's, shaking off my hair and my umbrella from the early fall weather outside. Based on how quickly it had cooled off in the last couple of weeks, it was going to be one cold mothereffing winter.

Looking up, I found an arrow pointing towards the children's section of the floor, and quickly followed it. My feet stopped abruptly when, as far as the eye could see, I came across rows and rows of miniature clothing.

Holy Hell. How was I supposed to find dance tights in all this?

"Can I help you?" asked a grandmotherly saleslady, seeing the flustered look on my face.

"Yes, thank you." I breathed in relief. "I'm looking for little girl's tights?" Now I felt my face get hot.

The saleslady either didn't notice or ignored it. "I can sure help you find that," she offered with a smile. She started walking and I followed silently.

"We've got all sorts of tights. Nylon, ribbed, cotton, footless." We arrived at a wall filled with at least four dozen hooks full of tights in every material, size, shape and color.

"Here you go." She motioned towards the selection with her hand. "My name is Lydia if you need any further assistance," she said, and started to walk away.

"Um, Lydia?" I called out, before she could get too far. She turned around, and seeing the bewilderment in my face, walked back towards me.

"Do you know what sort of tights you need?" she asked.

"Sparkly ones?"

Lydia grinned patiently. "Well, what's your daughter going to be using the tights for?"

I was about to correct her, when an unexplained feeling coursed through me.

"She needs them for her dance class," I answered instead.

"Ah, now we're getting somewhere," Lydia teased warmly. She sorted through the hooks until she came across some that seemed to satisfy what she was looking for.

"Aha, here we go; sparkly dance tights. We've got them in black, white and pink. What color do you need them in?"

I thought for a second. "Can I have a pair, actually two pairs" – what if Maddie accidentally ripped them again? – "in each color?"

"Of course," she agreed. "Now, what size can I get them in for you?"

Shit.

Lydia smiled gently. "How _old _is your daughter?"

"Four," I replied without any hesitation. In the back of my mind, I wondered if maybe, I was being a tad bit insane? _Aw, fuck it,_ I thought. Who would ever know?

"Ah, that's a wonderful age, isn't it? I have a four-year old granddaughter myself. They're little princesses at that age."

"Yes, they are."

"They grow up so quickly. You and your wife better enjoy her while you can."

I was loving Lydia more each minute. I grinned widely and said, "Thanks. We will."

She smiled again. Turning to sort through the different sizes, she asked, "Is she a big four-year old, or a small four-year old?"

I put my hand up to my upper thigh. "She's an up-to-here four-year old."

Lydia gave me a knowing look. She picked up two pairs in each color and handed them to me. "These are size four to six. They should fit her nicely."

I thanked her.

"You're welcome," she answered. "I hope your daughter likes them."

"Well, she specifically requested sparkly, so these should be just right," I smiled. I could've stood there and talked to Lydia for hours.

She patted my arm and moved in to say, "Your little girl's very lucky. Not many daddies would go shopping for their dance tights, much less put in so much effort to get exactly what they asked for."

I couldn't help the proud smile that lit my face.

"Good luck," she added, before walking away.

When it was my turn to pay, the woman at the register asked me if anyone had helped me out on the floor.

"Lydia helped me," I answered immediately. "And she should get a freakin' raise and a promotion for being the best god-damned assistant in this whole store."

I arrived at our midtown office late, but feeling lighter than I had in weeks, thanks in part to Lydia, but mostly thanks to the look Bella had given me last night as we said goodbye.

In the past couple of weeks, Bella had become such an enigma to me. There were times I could've sworn she felt as attracted to me as I did to her. Especially that first day I drove her to Maddie's dance class. It'd gotten so hard to resist her in the small confines of my car, and I'd found myself moving towards her, consumed with only the thought of tasting her soft lips on mine. And the shit is, at first I could've sworn I saw the same desire in her eyes. But all of a sudden, a look of total terror had crossed her face and I'd stopped dead in my tracks, which hadn't been a fucking easy thing to do.

Then, as if that wasn't enough of a hint to stay away from her, she'd mentioned that god-damned Jake guy. The tenderness in her voice when she spoke about him and how much he cared for her and Maddie felt like a hot dagger through my heart. And she'd gotten all pissed off at me after I'd called him a douche. I swear if his ass had been in front of me right then I would've beat the ever-living shit out of him. I'd never really considered myself to be the jealous type. I couldn't have cared less what Tanya or any of the other girls I'd ever dated did when I wasn't around. But maybe that was the key: I couldn't have cared less. That didn't seem to be the case anymore.

But when I calmed down, I realized that if Bella had feelings for Jake, my acting like an asshole wasn't going to change it. I'd have to accept her as a friend, and be grateful for that much, at least, as well as for the time I was allowed to spend with Maddie. I hoped that wherever that mofo Jake was, he was fucking thankful he had someone like Bella. But that didn't mean it didn't sting like a motherfucker.

And Alice ranting and raving since the night of Bella's birthday – when I'd taken her and Maddie to the Seaport – that she was sure that Bella and I were 'meant to be' – wasn't helping any. Although my family and I had learned to rarely doubt Alice's 'visions', I waned to stick a hot poker through that proverbial third eye of hers every time she started on that. All it did was remind me of what I couldn't have.

But then last night, when Bella had said good night, she'd looked at me so…differently, as if there was something she wanted to say, but didn't know quite how to. At first, I'd thought I had to be imagining things; wishful thinking and all that shit. But when I'd asked her if I'd see her tomorrow, I couldn't disguise the hope, the unequivocal desire in my question. What the hell, I figured. What else did I have to lose? At least this way, she could put me out of my misery once and for all.

And the way she'd answered, so open, so unguarded, I'd had to physically stop myself from doing a fist pump in the air and yelling "Yes!" as I'd quietly gotten into my car.

So despite the colder than normal temperature outside this morning, and all the fucking rain falling, it was one mighty fine morning in my book. And I could hardly wait to see Bella.

I had the perfect excuse too. When I'd promised Maddie last night that I'd send her a brand new pair of tights home with her mommy, she'd taken my face in her tiny hands and whispered in my ear, "Can _you_ bwing them home fuh me? Peez?"

How the hell could I say no to that?

After making a few morning phone calls, I turned to my laptop and, unable to hold off any longer, typed off a quick message.

**To: Isabella Swan**

**From: Edward Cullen**

**Good morning Bella. How are you on this beautifully rainy morning? The weather forecast calls for all-day showers and colder than normal temperatures. I was wondering if you'd like a ride home today?**

As I pressed the send button, I prayed that today would finally be different, and she wouldn't say no to me.

I made a couple more phone calls. Then I reviewed some files and preliminaries. I checked my email. No response yet. I went and spoke to Jasper about the Springtime Organics account. I came back and checked my email; still no response.

Feeling impatient, I paced back and forth across my office. What excuse could I use for going down to see her? I thought of the file Rosalie had sent me this morning, with Bella's latest designs for the Baby Bottom Campaign. The problem was, the office protocol called for me to direct my comments to Rosalie, who would then discuss them with Bella. And anyway, the designs had been perfect; there wasn't really much more input I could give on them. I checked my email one more time.

Nothing.

Screw it. I printed out the file and headed out of my office. I'd come up with some excuse on my way down.

Too anxious to wait for the elevator, I took the stairs down instead. It was only one floor. My heart began to beat faster knowing that I'd soon be talking to Bella. Maybe this would be the morning she let me buy her a cup of hot chocolate…

Lost in my thoughts, I barely heard the quiet whispers on the floor below until my mind registered who the voice belonged to.

"Are you sure Jake?" Bella asked. Her voice trembled. Like a man stuck in quicksand, I suddenly couldn't move.

"No Jake. Don't say that. It's not your fault. I should've known."

She was quiet for a few seconds.

"I don't know what I'm going to do," she finally said, her voice cracking. And then she was sobbing quietly. My hands fisted at my side. What was going on?

"I'll be okay Jake. Don't worry. I'll figure something out," she cried quietly.

Unable to bear it any longer, I quietly took the last few steps down, until I was on the step right above her. Bella sat at the bottom step, her head bent down as she spoke into her cell phone. When she heard me behind her, she turned quickly. My heart broke at the sight of tears streaming down her face. Her brown eyes grew wide and I wanted that motherfucker Jake in front of me so I could pummel him into oblivion. He had to be the dumbest prick in the world to hurt Bella.

"Jake, I've got to go. I'll call you back later." She hung up and stood, never taking her eyes off me.

We were both silent for a moment.

"Um, sorry," she mumbled finally. She appeared to be struggling, both for words and to keep her composure. "I'm, uh, uhm…I…I'm almost done with the last graphic for today's meeting with Rosalie. I should have it ready before-"

"Bella, what happened?" I interrupted.

She seemed confused. "I- Uh, I…I'll go get that last graphic done." She made to move past me, towards the door to her floor. Instinctively, I wrapped my hand around her arm and tugged her back gently, meaning to stop her and just get her to calm down before she walked back into the office. She looked like she was about to have a nervous break down.

But she turned and threw her arms around my neck, and suddenly, Bella and her warm body were wrapped around me. She held on as if for dear life, and without a second thought, my arms went around her waist and I held on to her just as tightly.

I knew she was upset. I could feel her chest rising and falling with her sobs. But I'd never imagined such a feeling in all my life. I'd never known you could feel so warm, so safe, so…_right_. I'd never known someone could fit in your arms so perfectly, as if they'd been made just for you.

I didn't care that apparently another man had just broken her heart. I didn't care that she just needed me to comfort her. I'd be here for her, no matter what. Always. And it was then, at the bottom of the twenty-second floor stairwell, on a nondescript, rainy Thursday morning in New York, with Bella crying in my arms, that I realized what she really meant to me.

She broke down, just as I'd expected her to, and the sound of her crying pierced my heart.

"Shh," I murmured, raising one arm to stroke her hair. God, it smelled even better and felt softer than I'd dreamed. "It'll be alright." And as much as I wanted to call that prick Jake every name in the book, I knew that wasn't what she needed to hear.

I turned my mouth towards her ear and whispered, "Bella, you deserve someone who'll appreciate what a treasure you are. Someone who'll wake up every morning and thank his lucky stars that-"

She pulled away from me, and my arms physically ached for her again.

"What?" she asked, with a puzzled look.

"I- I'm sorry. But I overheard your conversation with Jake. Bella, if he doesn't see what a gift he's got in you…in _both_ you and Maddie-"

"What?" she asked again. A muffled sound escaped her throat. She brought a hand up to cover her mouth before quickly sitting back down on the last step of the staircase, as if she feared that her legs would give out under her. She hung her head in her hands and started to cry again.

I stood there, confused and unsure as to what to do. After a few seconds, she looked up at me again. Her brown eyes bored into mine and drew me in, the way they always did. But in them, there was more fear and agony than I could've ever imagined, and all of a sudden, I knew this was more than just a broken heart.

I was abruptly gripped by a sharp pang of fear.

Kneeling down in front of her, I whispered, "Bella, what's going on?"

Bella's eyes searched mine, as if looking for something that would guide her in her response. Slowly, she lifted a shaking hand towards me. She was holding some papers I hadn't noticed before.

"I was served with these this morning, before I left for work."

With my own hands shaking now, I took the papers from her and opened them.

**State of Washington First District Family Court**

**Clallam County**

**In the matter of:**

**Paul Andrew Forrester, Plaintiff**

**vs.**

**Isabella Marie Swan, Defendant**

**Docket No. 99D-0010**

**To: Isabella Marie Swan, Legal Guardian of Madisen Grace Swan, minor.**

**You are hereby ordered, by the State of Washington, to appear before the Probate and Family Court at Port Angeles in the County of Clallam on the thirteenth day of October in the year 2010 at 9 o'clock am.**

**You are summoned to a hearing regarding the matter of: Madisen Grace Swan (previously Forrester) and the paternity rights of the Plaintiff regarding such child.**

**You are required to appear before the Magistrate of this court on the date and time scheduled above. You must bring with you the notarized results of a legal and official DNA examination to determine the paternity of the above minor, at which point any and all rights of the Plaintiff will be determined, as well as custody arrangements for the minor discussed.**

**You are strongly advised to bring Counsel with you to these hearings. If you fail to appear at the above-mentioned time and date, you forfeit any and all rights to a hearing and you will be forced to comply with any and all determinations and/or findings of this court. You will also be subject to such pains and penalties as the law provides.**

**If you have any questions before this hearing…**

I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath. It felt as if a huge weight had been hurled at my chest at a hundred miles an hour. My mind struggled to make sense of what I'd just read.

Bella's quiet sobs broke me away from the flood of questions invading my mind.

"He doesn't even want her," she whispered, her hands cradling the top of her head. "I tried getting a hold of Jake all morning. I finally got through to him now. He told me," – her voice broke again – "he said he hadn't wanted to worry me so that's why he hadn't told me that Paul, my ex-husband came back to Forks a couple of weeks ago."

For some reason, I felt my hands curl into fists at my sides.

"He's been asking around about me. Wanting to know where I went but…I only told a few people I was coming to New York. None of which would ever tell him." She drew in a deep breath, as if the act of speaking was physically hurting her. "Jake wouldn't tell me all the details, but apparently he and Paul got into some sort of…argument after Jake refused to tell him where I was." – I noticed she kept saying her ex-husband was asking where _she_ was, not where _they_, as in Bella _and Maddie_, were. "He told Jake it didn't matter anyway, if he didn't tell him, because he knew exactly how to bring me back to Forks and make me stay."

She finally raised her eyes to me. Silent tears streamed down her face.

"He's never wanted her Edward. At least…at least if I knew he really cared about her. I would've never separated my daughter from a father who really loved her. But he barely even acknowledged her existence, or looked at her. And he _never_ looked at her the way you-"

She looked back down without finishing her sentence. Her hands moved nervously around each other.

"He's just using her," she continued. "He's using her to-"

"To get to you."

She let out one hard, bitter chuckle. "The thing is, he doesn't really want me either. He's like a spoiled little boy who's had the candy jar hidden from him. No one would tell him where I was, so he got the courts to find me. And now he's pretending to want Maddie."

Two thoughts, separate but still related suddenly suspended themselves in my head.

_They're mine. Protect them._

I took another look at the letter still in my hand.

...results of a legal and official DNA examination to determine the paternity…

I'd suspected...I'd sort of known Maddie carried Bella's maiden name instead of her father's. There were so many questions…

"What am I going to do?" Bella moaned quietly, again bringing me back to the real priority here. She seemed to be asking the question more to herself than to me. Nevertheless, I yearned to pull her back into my arms and tell her everything was going to be alright. But Bella needed help, not empty reassurances.

"Do you have a lawyer?" I asked gently.

She drew in another deep breath. "I used this man my dad met through work, Stan Michaels, for the divorce. They used to fish together," she whispered. "He did fine, I guess. I waived any rights to alimony, and Paul...he made some accusations…I didn't contest them. I just wanted it over. When I changed Maddie's last name, Paul didn't contest that. That pretty much took care of everything. There was no need for child support determinations. Other than that, we didn't have much." She snorted. "Pretty cut and dry."

Every word she spoke had my mind burning with more and more questions. But I had to stay focused.

_They're mine. Protect them._

There was no way in hell Bella's father's fishing buddy was going any where near this.

I reached out slowly and took one of Bella's hands. She looked up, surprised, but didn't pull away.

"Bella, let me make a couple of phone calls. I might know someone-"

She tilted her tear-stained face, puzzled by my words. "What?" She seemed so confused, so broken. I hadn't heard her ask that question so many times in one day since I'd met her.

She suddenly closed her eyes and shook her head quickly before opening them back up, looking at me as if she'd just realized everything she'd shown me and told me.

"Edward, no. Look, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-" She closed her eyes again. "Just- Just forget about this? Okay? This isn't something you need to worry about." She looked down at the court summons in my hand and slowly took it away from me.

She stood up and straightened herself out, wiping the tears off her face. "I've got a meeting with Rosalie and the rest of our team in ten minutes. I've got to go get ready for that. The last thing I need right now is to find myself without a job."

I stood up and faced her. "Bella-"

She shook her head again. I could see the tears threatening at the corners of her eyes once more. Fear was evident in every fiber of her being. How the hell was she planning on getting through the next ten minutes, much less the rest of the day?

I took her face in my hands and forced her to meet my gaze. "Bella, I'm going to make some phone calls." She started to protest, but I spoke over her. "Go to the meeting, and I'll call you." My tone left no room for argument.

Her eyes met mine and the defeated look in hers rocked me to the core. This wasn't the Bella I knew.

I wanted to hold her against me again and tell her that they'd take Maddie away from her over my dead body. "Bella, no one's taking Maddie away," I told her, tightening my grip on her face instead of pulling her to me like I really wanted to.

"You don't know that. You don't know…him."

"I may not know him, but I know other people. Please Bella. Let me help you."

She must've seen something in my eyes. She gave me a small nod, and I offered her a small smile in return. "Now go. Everything will be okay Bella."

We stood there silently for a few moments, her face still between my hands, until I felt her starting to pull away and I automatically dropped my hands from her face. Without another word, she turned and walked out of the stairwell.

I stood frozen in place for about five seconds before my feet sprung to action and I took the steps three at a time back up to my office.

Ignoring Angela's messages about the calls I'd missed while I'd been away from my office, I called out, "Hold all my calls. And if anyone comes looking for me tell them to come back later," before rushing into my office and closing the door behind me.

I dialed my uncle's cell phone number quickly, cursing when he didn't pick up. I hung up and dialed again, and again it went straight to voice mail.

"Fuck!" I growled, hanging up and dialing his office number. His secretary picked up and told me he was in a meeting.

"Can you please get him and tell him it's his nephew, Edward, and it's an emergency."

Silence filled the other line for a few seconds before his secretary answered, "Mr. Cullen, Mr. Volturi has given strict orders not to be disturbed when he's in a-"

I let out a huge gust of air, running my hand through my hair. "Look, you've got two choices here. Either tell him I'm on the line and need to speak to him RIGHT NOW, or be ready for me to bust down your office doors if I have to come down there-"

"Hold on Mr. Cullen," his secretary quickly said in an annoyed voice.

Just as I was getting ready to hang up and make good on my promise, Aro came on the line.

"Edward?"

"Uncle Aro. Sorry to take you out of your meeting."

"That's fine. Family comes first, you know that. What's going on?" he asked in a concerned voice.

"I need some help."

"Sure. What is it?"

I hesitated for just a split second. "I need the name of the best family attorney you know, preferably someone with experience in paternity cases."

"What? Why? What is this about Edward?"

"He needs to be available right away. I don't care how much-"

"Aw shit Edward!" Uncle Aro interrupted. "Don't tell me you made a money shot in the night deposit box! Aw shit! Son, how many times have I told you? No glove, no love! Cover your stump before you hump! If you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it!"

"Uncle Aro-"

"I thought you were smarter than that Edward!"

"Uncle Aro! This isn't about me! I've got a friend-"

"Uh, huh…a friend…"

"Aro, damn it, listen to me!" Silence on the other line.

"I've got a friend whose ex-husband is trying to get custody of...their daughter."

"Full custody, or partial?"

"I'm not really sure."

"Well, if he wants to share custody, that should be his right, shouldn't it?"

"Aro, this man...from what she's told me…he's not a good guy Aro. And he doesn't want the little girl because he loves her, but because he's trying to get back at B- at his ex-wife."

Aro was silent again. "How do you figure into this Edward?"

"I told you. She's a friend of mine."

More silence. "Would this friend happen to be the pretty new Graphic Designer-"

"Aro, do you know someone or not? Because I don't have time to waste. I'll start making other calls-"

"Relax, Edward. Relax." I heard him sigh on the other line. "The guy I used for my last divorce. He's tops. Jeanine tried to say the little bun she had cooking in the oven was mine, but I knew better. I made sure I wrapped it in foil before I checked her oil," he chuckled. Uncle Aro was fond of euphemisms. "Anyway, the guy cost me a fortune, but it was worth it, would've cost me more to support a little bugger that didn't belong to me."

"His name's Jay Jenks. He's got a huge office in midtown, not far from you actually. Want the number?"

"Yeah. Thanks," I breathed, supporting my phone between my ear and my shoulder while I grabbed for a pen and paper. I quickly scrawled down the number my uncle gave me.

"Now listen Edward," Uncle Aro continued after he'd given me the number. "This guy doesn't come cheap. I think I single-handedly paid for his summer house in St. Lucia."

"That's not an issue," I answered.

He was silent once again. "I hope she's worth it Godson."

"Thanks for the information unc," I answered, ignoring his comment. "I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah, talk to you later Edward."

I hung up and quickly called the number Aro had given me. Jay Jenks' secretary took my name and put me on hold for five minutes.

A gruff voice finally came over the line. "Edward Cullen, to what do I owe _your_ call?" I could already tell by his tone that he'd come to a similar conclusion my uncle had on why I needed to call him.

"I got your name from my uncle, Aro Volturi. I have a friend that needs your help."

"I'm listening."

I explained what I knew, which wasn't much.

"If she's due in Court in the State of Washington in less than a week, we're going to have to see her right away. I can probably put one of my junior attorneys on the case."

"What? No! No. My uncle said you were the expert. _You _need to take the case." I wasn't letting him hand this off to some snot-nosed junior attorney. I thought of Bella and the way she'd looked in the stairwell this morning. Then I thought of Maddie, and the way she'd held on to me yesterday after she'd fallen, and how her big brown eyes had lit up when I'd told her I'd be stopping by tonight to bring her her new tights.

"I'll pay you triple whatever your biggest client is paying you now. Hand one of _them_ over to your junior attorneys."

I heard Jay Jenks sigh on the other line. "Son, I've got a shitload of cases on my desk right now. I've got a rap artist who's got three different women claiming he's their baby daddy, and-"

"Listen to me Jay," I started, "I don't give a flying fuck about any stupid fucking rap artist that doesn't know better than to cover his funnel before entering the tunnel," – my uncle was starting to rub off on me – "I've got a little girl here with only one real parent, and a fucking sperm donor that wants to take that little girl away from her mom just to prove a point. I think that trumps your dumb fuck of a rap artist any day."

I could hear Jenks breathing hard on the other line. I closed my eyes.

"Have her in my office in an hour. We've got a lot of work to do."

I blew out a huge gust of air and opened my eyes again.

"Thanks Jenks."

"Don't thank me yet Cullen. I don't know jack shit about this case yet. And if your friend wants my personal services, you better make sure she's ready to pay a fucking premium for them."

"That's another thing," I said. I sat down. "I need you to tell Ms. Swan that you'll be taking her case pro bono."

"WHAT?" Jenks yelled into the phone. "Pro Bono! Now wait a minute. I don't do any fucking pro bono-"

"Calm down Jenks. I'm not asking you to actually take the case pro bono. Just tell her that you are. You'll be billing me for everything, every last cent. And don't spare any expense Jenks. You do whatever you need to do to make sure this asshole doesn't fuck with Ms. Swan or her daughter again."

Jenks chuckled. "Hey, now I'm seeing the resemblance between you and your uncle."

We hung up, agreeing that Bella would meet him at his midtown office in an hour.

I stood in front of my window for a moment, watching as the umbrella clad people on the ground rushed to and fro. Yellow cabs whizzed by, honking angrily at pedestrians that refused to stop at the sight of them. This was New York; there was no such thing as the right of way.

To everyone below, it was just another typical rainy morning in New York. They were unaware that somewhere above them, there was a mother terrified of losing her daughter. And in a large office, staring out of his floor-to-ceiling windows was a man terrified of losing his…

His what? I ran my hand down my face. It was one thing to pretend with a stranger in the middle of the sales floor of Nordstrom. But this morning's events weren't pretend; this was real fucking life.

I took a deep breath. "Okay," I said, forcing my focus back to what had to be done now. I quickly strode back to my door and opened it, rushing back out.

"Edward, the VP of NBC has called twice. He wants to discuss-"

"Not now Ang. Tell him I'll call him back," I called out as I rushed to the stairwell again. I heard Angela let out a sigh of frustration behind me.

Bella would be in the meeting with Rosalie and the rest of the group now. How the fuck would I explain barging into the meeting and taking Bella out? I sighed. Well, there wasn't really any other choice. Jenks needed Bella at his office right away. I couldn't wait for the meeting to be over.

Rosalie's secretary, Margaret, frowned at me when she realized I was going into Rosalie's office even though the door was closed.

"Edward, Rosalie's in a meeting."

"I know Margaret," I responded and turned the knob.

"…need to move the angle of the shot about twenty degrees to the…" Rosalie stopped, looking up from the screen that she and the rest of her team had been concentrating on. She frowned when she saw me standing by the door.

"Edward. What is it?"

I couldn't think of any excuse. "Uh, I need to talk to Bella for a second." I glanced over at Bella. She looked startled, and completely out of it, as if she hadn't been able to focus on one damn thing since this morning.

Rosalie looked confused. She opened her mouth to say something, and then closed it again. "Right now? We're in the middle of a meeting."

"Yeah, it's uh- I've got someone on the phone and uh- I need to…" I had no fucking idea what I was saying. I stared at Rosalie, pleading with her with my eyes-

"Well, go ahead then," Rosalie agreed, to my complete surprise. "Try to hurry it up though, we've got some changes to make to this board and I need her input."

I nodded quickly, glancing around the room. James watched me curiously. I couldn't give a shit what he thought. Lauren on the other hand, had her eyes narrowed suspiciously, a small sneer playing on the corners of her mouth. I couldn't be bothered to care what she thought either.

Bella rose from her seat, avoiding everyone's eyes. "Excuse me," she mumbled quietly before walking out the door. I followed her out and closed the door behind me.

"Come on." I said to her, once she met my eyes. She looked lost. We walked in silence towards the stairwell, and I opened the door for her and followed her half-way down the steps, where we both came to a stop at the landing.

"I found a lawyer who specializes in family law; specifically, paternity cases."

Bella's eyes grew wide and her cheeks flushed, as if what I'd said had embarrassed her somehow.

"I told him about the hearing. He needs to meet with you right away though. His office isn't too far from here. If you want-"

Bella frowned. "Edward, how did you- What-" She closed her eyes as if trying to organize her thoughts. She drew in a deep breath and reopened her eyes, wrinkling her forehead. "Who is he?"

"He's a friend of my uncle's. His name is Jay Jenks." I pulled out the paper I'd scribbled his name, phone number and address on and handed it to her.

She stared at my hand for a few seconds before slowly taking the paper from me. She looked at it as if she were having a hard time understanding what was on it.

A single tear streamed down her face. It took all my effort not to lean into her and kiss it away. Or to pull her into my arms again, the way she'd been less than half an hour ago. I knew at some point, I'd be reliving that moment again, but now wasn't the time for that.

When she looked back up at me, she had tears in her eyes again. "Edward, I appreciate everything you're trying to do. But…" She crumpled the paper in her hand. "I can't afford a hot shot-"

"He's offered to take the case pro bono."

Her eyes widened again. "What?"

"Yeah," I lied smoothly. "My uncle…well, he's given him a lot of business, so…" I shrugged.

Bella opened her hand and looked at the paper again. She bit her lip, as if debating something. I didn't want to give her too much time to think about this.

"He's waiting for you, at that address."

She looked back up at me quickly. "But what about work? The meeting? Rosalie's waiting for-"

"I'll take care of Rosalie," I assured her. Slowly, I reached out and took her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. If was as if, having finally felt her, having been given a taste of her warmth, I couldn't keep myself from touching her anymore. Bella looked down at our hands, but didn't pull away.

"Bella. Everything's going to be okay. I swear to you."

She shook her head. "There's so much you don't know. Paul…he didn't fight the divorce too much, or Maddie's name change, because it suited him at the time. But when he fights, he fights dirty. He'll do or say anything…He's used to getting his way."

A burning fury suddenly took hold of me. What had that motherfucker done to Bella and Maddie?

"That may be," I began, "but unfortunately for him, _so am I_."

I held on to her hand, and with my other hand, I lifted her chin with my thumb and forefinger until her eyes met mine. I gazed at her intently. - "And _I_ say, _no one_ is taking Maddie away from you."

In my mind, I amended it slightly._ From us_.

* * *

**A/N: So we find out who Bella's ex-husband is. Surprised? Let me know what you think. And yes, he's an a-hole.**

**Like I said, Edward's POV will continue next chapter.**

**Leave me a review, and I'll give you a sneak peak of the next chapter!**


	10. Chapter 9 Bittersweet

**A/N: Hey everyone, I know it's been a while. Sorry, been sick, kids back to school and homework, yada yada. Here's the next installment. A couple of quick things first.**

**Sorry if I didn't get back to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. Like I said, it's been hectic. I know I promised a sneak peak to this chapter to all who reviewed, but as I wrote it, I had to make a few changes, and while the sneak peak will still make an appearance, it'll be in the chapter after this one. Sorry about that.**

**This is the second chapter in a row from Edward's POV. The next chapter will be from his POV too. Sorry if this upsets anyone, but I kind of forgot to mention at the beginning of the story that while this is an E & B story, it is mostly Edward's (as you may have been able to tell from the title). While I will try to keep the POVs alternating as much as possible, there may be times such as these when E's POV takes more than one chapter to tell. Again, sorry.**

**Ofcourse, thanks to Danna0724. I told you yesterday, but I'll tell you again, you mean the world to me sweets. **

**All characters belong to S. Meyer, I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

**Anyway, here we go:**

_Song Rec for Chapter: __**I'm Yours**__ by Jason Mraz_

**Chapter 9 - Bittersweet **

**EPOV**

Rosalie stormed into my office later that day, after Bella left to meet with Jenks.

"What the hell Edward? Where's Bella?"

"She had a family emergency and had to leave," I replied evenly.

Rosalie glared at me through narrowed eyes, her hands at her waist. For a long minute, she just stood there, watching me and not saying a word. Studying me. I kept my body angled towards my laptop as I fiddled around with it and tried to ignore her.

"Edward, I'm going to say something."

_Obviously_. I sighed loudly and brought my eyes up to meet Rosalie's, massaging my temples with my fingers. Already, I could feel the effects of her words on my brain. "Go ahead."

"Now you know I don't give out compliments lightly, but in the short time Bella's been here, she's proven herself to be extremely capable and talented at what she does."

"I agree," I nodded.

"I'd like to see her go far in this agency. I…" – she paused – "In a few months, the dynamics in my office may change" – I frowned, but she went on before I could ask what the hell that meant – "and I'd like to see Bella take on more responsibility. I think she'd handle it extremely well."

She stopped and, setting her lips in a tight line, shot me a piercing look.

"And?" I prompted.

"And…I wouldn't want people around here to question Bella's increasing role in this agency. To insinuate that there were reasons other than her talent that helped her move ahead."

I leaned forward, raising my eyebrows. "Who exactly would insinuate that, and why?"

Rosalie came closer to my desk, placing four fingers from each hand on the edge. "Let's just say there are certain people on my team who haven't missed the" – she raised an eyebrow – "extra attention Bella's received from…certain execs in this agency. And maybe, a certain person on that team may have been under the impression that her…talents, and I don't mean her work-related talents, would help her advance here."

"I never gave anyone here that impression," I hissed, placing both palms down in front of me and leaning in even closer.

"Don't interrupt," she hissed back, and continued, although leaning back slightly. "Anyway, that team member might not be too happy if she thinks she's being replaced by Bella."

I drew back before responding, but my jaw remained tight. "First of all, you're not very subtle Rose. Second, you've got it _all_ wrong. All of it."

"For Bella's sake, I really hope so. Believe me, no one knows better than I do how good she is at this, or how hard she works. She deserves to go far," Rosalie said coolly before her face softened somewhat. "The fact is Edward, I really like Bella. She's smart and tough and she knows how to get results. She doesn't deserve to be played around with, or to have her very promising career put in jeopardy by a thoughtless _asshole_" – she added through narrowed eyes – "who hasn't thought through to the consequences of whatever game he thinks he's playing."

I snorted and shook my head. "Believe me Rose, playing games is the last thing on said 'thoughtless asshole's' mind right now."

"Like I said, I hope so. Because Bella's not like that other team member that dumb ass was fooling around with before. And she and her daughter would have a lot to lose if that asshole fucked it all up somehow."

We glared at each other, neither one of us saying another word, for what seemed like forever. She looked like she was waiting for something, some sort of explanation, or confession, or plea. But her intimidation techniques didn't work on me, let her save that shit for my brother.

"Are you done?" I finally said.

"I suppose," she responded through pursed lips. She eyes me suspiciously for a few seconds longer before turning around and walking out of my office.

When the door closed behind her, I let out a deep breath. Shit. I lowered my head to my hand and pinched the bridge of my nose.

It wasn't even Rosalie I was irritated with. Not really. Fucking Lauren. Fuck, I wished I could go back in time and change that day and tell her to fuck off when she oh-so-subtly let me know she wasn't wearing any panties under her skirt and that the conference room was nice and empty. What the hell had I been thinking?

I snorted and shook my head. Fuck. I couldn't even really blame Lauren, could I? Just like I couldn't blame Rosalie for what she'd just accused me of. After the way I'd acted, not just that day, but for years, of course she'd think I was just playing games. It's what I'd done best, for so long. I snorted again, wondering what Rosalie would say if she knew I hadn't had sex in almost three months.

The hours passed by achingly slow, and the work day ended without my having heard a word back from Bella. At home, I couldn't concentrate. I changed into sweats and grabbing my cell phone, headed across the street to Central Park for a jog.

I tried to block everything out as I ran, the stares from strangers, the sounds of ambulances and fire trucks racing down the city streets, on their way to only God knew where. How many emergencies and fires could actually occur in this city a day?

The sound of Claire De Lune coming from my cell phone made me trip over a rock and I almost fell on my ass as I reached into my pocket for the phone. I was so anxious I picked it up without bothering to check the caller ID.

Warning: Always, Always, Always check your caller ID.

"Edward dahling, I've been calling and calling. I've missed you."

"Tanya," I breathed in frustration. I stopped and leaned over, bending my knees and placing one hand on top of one.

"Yes, dahling. I know it's been too long. You don't come to any of the clubs anymore. No one's seen or heard from you in weeks. If I didn't know better I'd think you were avoiding me."

"That's because I have been." Silence. I picked up the bottom of my t-shirt and brought it up to wipe the sweat off my face. Behind me, I heard some distinct gasps and giggles. Rolling my eyes, I started walking towards a park bench.

"Look Tanya, I've gotta go. I'm expecting a call and-"

"Edward," Tanya purred, and I rolled my eyes, "I know I was a bad girl last time we saw each other. I shouldn't have hurt your…pride that way."

"My _pride?_" I snorted, sitting down. She'd practically ripped my balls off in that car that night. Pride had been the last thing running through my mind at the time. I vaguely remembered wondering if she'd killed my chances to father children.

"I'm sorry baby. Let me make it up to you. When was the last time you had your…pride stroked properly?"

And being the fucking man that I was, my _pride_ – no matter how involuntarily - stood at attention at that question.

Yeah, it'd been a while since my pride had been stroked. I leaned down and placed my elbows on my knees, feeling uncomfortably exposed.

"Tanya," I sighed, "You and I, we gave it a try, a few actually, and it didn't work out."

Instead of hanging up, she laughed, sounding amused.

"Dahling, I'm not calling to see if you want to get back together. I just wanted to see if you needed some company tonight. You and I were always so good together baby. Let me make you feel good and then…well, we'll see where it goes from there."

Ah. A one-night hookup. That's what she'd been hounding me for. One meaningless, lustful, carnal night. A quickie to relieve all the pent up sexual frustration that had been building up over the last three celibate months I'd been through.

Funny thing. I wasn't tempted. Now that my brain had had time to process the words and their source of delivery, my downstairs head realized there was nothing to get excited about; and my…_pride_ was at ease again.

"Tanya, look. You don't seem to understand. I'm. Not. Interested. Period. Not in a one-night hookup, not in a relationship. It's over. Maybe someday we can be friends, but right now-"

She laughed again. I gritted my teeth and cringed. Her cackling had always gotten to me. The witch had a fucking way of getting under my skin and completely ignoring what I was trying to tell her.

"Look Tanya, I really have to go-"

"So," she interrupted me, "Are you still trying to work your way into the single mommy's pants, or did you get in already?"

"I'm hanging up now."

She giggled. "Did you flash her that special little grin of yours? I'm sure she must've dropped her panties faster than-"

I hung up.

When the phone rang again five seconds later, I was fuming.

"Listen Tanya," I hissed, "I don't know what the hell you want, but-"

"Edward?"

I closed my eyes and my face contorted. _Shit_. That soft, sweet, silky voice definitely didn't belong to Tanya.

Again, Warning: Always check your Caller ID.

"Bella?"

"Uhm, yeah. Sorry. Am I…were you…I didn't mean to interrupt if you were in the middle of something…"

"No! No! Please! You aren't interrupting. I mean, I wasn't in the middle of anything," I stuttered. "Bella," I breathed, "how are you? What's going on? What happened today?"

"I uh…" - she paused, hesitating – "I would've called earlier, but I wasn't sure- I mean, I called Alice because she'd been leaving me worried messages all day." I rolled my eyes. Rosalie must've told her Bella left work early because of an emergency. "I sort of told her, you know, what happened today, and I told her about my meeting with Jenks. She said maybe I should call you, and let you know how it went? But if you're busy-"

"Bella no," I interrupted her. "I told you, I wasn't busy. Please, tell me what happened with Jenks."

She was silent for a couple of seconds. In the background, I could hear pans clattering together and the clicking sound of a stove burner being switched on. Maddie's little voice sang along with some tune from the TV.

'_Dora, Dora, Dora the Explorer…'_

"Well, Jenks says he feels pretty confident that the law is on my side, and that…Paul," – she seemed to have trouble saying his name – "won't get very far with this."

I frowned. Pretty confident could be a shitload of miles away from confident, especially in crooked lawyer terms. _No offense Uncle Aro_, I thought.

"When I got divorced my lawyer filed some paperwork where Paul basically gave up his rights to Maddie, so he really shouldn't have a right to bring this claim forward now." I wondered incredulously what kind of father would voluntarily sign away his rights to his child, but I didn't ask. I could tell by her voice that although she wasn't as freaked out as she'd been this morning, she was still uneasy.

"So that's good then, right?" I asked.

I waited for her answer with growing apprehension. My eyes took in the reservoir surrounded by the five mile running loop around the Park. The still, dark waters reflected the scene around me. Large brown boulders protruding from the ground, some small, several large enough for both tourists and lovers to climb; the former for better pictures, the latter to lay down blankets and kiss under the large cypress trees; prickly needles turning brittle and coppery-bronze, making their way down slowly like dark drops of rain in the cool, fall air and encircling both tourists and lovers alike.

She sighed finally. "Yes, as long as he filed the right one. Jenks says there are basically two different Affidavits that can be filed for that type of action, which one gets filed depends on the circumstances of the case. But with one, all rights are relinquished, with the other, things are a bit less clear."

"Which affidavit did your lawyer file?"

"I'm not sure." She stopped. "God, I know how stupid that sounds. I should know this right? I mean, Jesus, probably one of the most important documents I'll ever have filed on my behalf, and I'm not even sure what it said."

I cursed internally for not having gone with her to Jenks' office today. I'd seen how terrified she'd been, I should've offered to come with her. But I knew there'd be personal matters she'd probably have to discuss with him, and as curious as I was, I hadn't wanted to intrude.

"Bella, don't beat yourself up over it. Just take a look at it-"

"It's not that easy. I don't have any of the divorce papers with me. They're all filed away at my dad's house in Forks. I know I should've brought them with me but" – she huffed loudly – "I just wanted to forget all of it when I left. I wanted to make believe that part of my life had never happened."

My heart sank. "So you have to go to Washington to get your documents?" I'd been hoping Jenks would find a way to make the whole thing disappear without Bella having to leave the state. For the kind of god-damn money he was planning on billing, he should've had a fucking magic wand and a black top hat to stuff Paul into permanently.

"No matter what, I still have to appear in court next week. Jenks says depending on how my old lawyer filed the Affidavit with the court, he may have to issue a couple of subpoenas for testimony on my behalf-"

"I'll testify," I offered.

She chuckled softly. "Thanks Edward, but it doesn't really work that way. He's got to subpoena a couple of people who were involved in my divorce, and…in the paternity issue."

"Jacob?" I asked, cringing when I realized the implications of what I'd just asked.

An uncomfortable silence filled my ears.

"Yes, Jacob," Bella answered quietly.

I wasn't sure how to respond, so instead focused on ordering my mind not to stray enough to wonder how Jacob figured into a paternity question involving Maddie. But my fucking mind apparently had a mind of its own, and it started straying.

"Anyway, the whole point is," Bella continued, bringing me back, "I've got to fly back to Washington right away, and dig up all the divorce papers, the paternity waiver, and Jenks said he's going to see if he can file an injunction on the DNA testing. There's no way in hell I'm putting my daughter through that. He's going to get things rolling from here, and then he'll meet me in Washington on Monday." She took a deep breath. "I won't be back at work this week. And I'll probably be out all of next. I'll miss the Cartwright meeting."

I closed my eyes and swallowed hard. Those douche bag Cartwrights were the last thing on my mind right now.

"Bella, that's not even, don't even worry about that."

"It's just, I know I'm still new, and to be taking so much time off-"

"You concentrate on doing what you need to do. This'll all still be here when you return."

She sighed in relief. "Thanks Edward."

I suddenly had the thought that Bella might not have called me because she needed to speak to me, as a friend, but because she needed to speak to me as her boss. Was that all I was to her, her boss, one of the owners of the agency?

I felt abruptly exhausted. Drained from the long fucking day, and tired of this roller coaster ride of emotions, of wondering what she felt and of wondering if she had even an inkling of how _I _felt.

"Bella, you know I'm here for you right? Not just as your…co-worker. I'm here for both you _and_ Maddie, in any way you need me."

She was quiet again, and I held my breath, wondering again what she was thinking. She had to know what I meant, didn't she? Did I have to be clearer? God, I felt like such a girl; so 'Dear God, it's me Edward' like. When had I lost my peen and grown a vagina?

"You _have_ been there for us Edward," she finally answered. "And I want to thank you again, for everything. I need you to know that I truly appreciate how great you've been to both of us."

For a second, I reveled in the sweetness in her voice; in the way her tone warmed me, until an unpleasant shiver ran up my spine and I focused more closely on what she was actually saying.

"Why do you sound like you're saying-"

"I don't know if I'll be back Edward," she murmured.

I sat up straighter, taken aback by her words. "What do you mean?" I finally asked.

"If things don't go well, if somehow my ex-husband gets his way-"

I stiffened. "Bella, listen to me. He is not getting his way. I promise you that." As I said it, I knew that no matter what, I'd make sure those words were true.

"You don't know Paul, Edward. When he wants something-"

"I told you. He is not getting his way. Not this time."

In the time I'd known Bella, I'd come to see she was a woman with a quiet confidence. She wasn't the outwardly tough she-devil Rosalie was, or even the happy-go-lucky banshee Alice was, but she had a reserved strength that was all her own.

But the Bella I'd seen today was frightened and unsure, and it infuriated me that whatever her ex had done to her had left her so wary. She was so young, so strong, so _beautiful_. She should've been made to feel happy and safe always, both she and Maddie; cherished like two invaluable treasures. I was struck by the realization that her ex-husband had once had the chance to make her feel happy and safe, and somehow he'd thrown it away and done the exact opposite. How stupid was this man? To have once been able to call Bella and Maddie his, and to give that up? Insane.

My muscles coiled at the thought that whatever he'd done must've broken her spirit so badly that she'd lost all belief in herself. My fists automatically curled, feeling a sudden need to hit something, some_one_ in particular. Not having any way to release my irritation, I stood up and started circling the bench like a beast circling its prey, only I had no idea where my prey was. Not exactly. And once again I found myself contemplating the same thoughts that had instinctively jumped to the forefront of my mind earlier in the day, when I'd found Bella crying by the stairwell.

_They're mine. Protect them._

I wasn't crazy enough to think that they were really mine. I had no right to call them that. But there it was. The thought I couldn't escape from; the thought I didn't _want_ to escape from. No matter what, I _would_ protect them both.

"Bella, I could come to Washington with you and Maddie." I didn't know where the words came from, but once they were out, I didn't want to take them back. If nothing else had told her that my interest for her went beyond that of a friend or co-worker, that sentence had to do it.

"I don't think that would be a good idea Edward."

I closed my eyes in defeat, sitting down hard as if my legs had lost their ability to hold me up.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Well, for one thing, you need to be here for the Cartwright meeting. You can't miss that," she pointed out calmly. "For another…" – she hesitated, and when the words poured out, her voice was shaky, not quite so calm anymore – "You've been really great to me Edward. And Maddie, she worships you, she really does. And I can tell you feel really close to her too. The way you are with her, the way you treat her and talk to her, I can't tell you what that's meant to me. It's so much more than what she ever got from her…from Paul. I'm so grateful for you Edward, and I know you want to be there for Maddie now, and make sure everything works out, but you've already done so much for her, more than I could've ever hoped for. I don't expect any more than that."

I could hear her uneven breathing on the other line.

"What if I want to give more than that?"

She didn't answer. Her silence was aggravated by the sudden quiet settling over the Park, now that the reds and oranges of sunset were giving way to an increasingly navy sky. Runners, children and lovers headed home; tourists headed to their overpriced hotels. Early fall evenings in the city were unpredictable, and this one had cooled considerably once the sun disappeared for the night behind the smooth silver buildings, leaving only the bright lights of the skyscrapers to illuminate the concrete jungle; Manhattan's ritzy version of stars.

"Bella, everything you just said about my feelings for Maddie, that's all true. You _know _that, you can see how special she's become to me. But is that _all_ you see Bella?" I could hear the intensity in my voice, and I hoped she knew what it meant.

More silence.

"Don't you see that I may want to be there not just for her" – I swallowed thickly – "but for you?"

I heard her take in a sharp breath, and I closed my eyes in relief. For a split second, I'd been afraid she'd hung up.

"I don't know Edward," she whispered softly.

I opened my eyes again with renewed intensity and increasing determination. The softness in her voice belied her words. "What don't you know? You don't understand what I'm trying to tell you? Don't you hear it in my voice? Don't you see it in my eyes when I look at you? Or is it that you don't know if you _want_ me there for you?"

"Edward, let's not do this now. Not like this. Not over the phone."

Now it was my turn to be silent.

"It's just…with this whole thing now…it's just not good timing, you know? I can't think about anything beyond this hearing. I can't...consider anything other than that. And I feel like there's things I'd need to tell you, and questions you'd have, and honestly, questions _I_ might have, and I just can't do that right now. Not with this hearing looming next week."

"We can put all that aside for now; any questions and answers. It can all wait."

She laughed, but it wasn't a happy laugh.

"Put it all aside for now?" she repeated. "Edward," – she sighed heavily – "I've been trying to put it aside for years. You have no idea how much drama I've got in my life. I mean, it's been like a god-damn soap opera. And now it's all starting up again."

"I know you won't be able to focus on anything other than the hearing now Bella. I wouldn't expect you to. Hell, I don't know how _I'm_ going to get through the next few days. I'm not asking you for anything; no explanations, no clarifications. Just let me be there for you."

"But Edward, that's just it. I can't let you be there for me without letting you know exactly what that means." She continued more slowly, as if measuring her words. "It wouldn't be fair to ask that of you. It's not…my life is not what you're used to Edward. I don't dance, I don't party, I don't smile pretty for the camera, I hate having my life scrutinized and examined from every angle, I _like_ my privacy, I like my anonymity. I don't like being judged by others. My idea of a perfect night is staying home with my daughter, playing with her, and then curling up with a good book once she's gone to bed. Definitely not the glamorous life People Magazine would right a cover story about. And you know what? That suits me perfectly."

As if to magnify the meaning of her words, a bright white light flashed in the distance, and when I automatically turned towards it, a young man with a large lens camera snapped another quick picture before scurrying away. I scowled and put my head down, beginning to realize how little my life belonged to me.

"Bella, those things, those aren't me either. I mean maybe they used to be. But all the partying and dancing, that public life, that's not how I want to be seen. Not anymore. That's not what I want."

She was quiet for a while. I could hear her moving around, the clanking of cooking tools and things being poured and mixed. In the background, Maddie was quiet now, whatever show she'd been singing along with now ended. I wondered what else she did in the evenings while waiting for her mother to get dinner ready. Did she read? Did she color or draw? What would it be like to be in that little apartment right now, watching Bella cook, or helping her, or playing with Maddie? What would it feel like to share Bella's version of a perfect night?

Bella's quiet voice startled me, so lost had I been in my internal musings.

"Edward, this hearing, it's going to bring to light everything I've been trying to put behind me for the past couple of years. All the pain and embarrassment I've been trying to keep my dad and Jake from, it's all going to come out now." I heard the sound of a chair scraping against the floor, and then she huffed and the kitchen clanking stopped momentarily. I could picture her sitting down, exhausted, frustrated. She laughed again, but this time I could clearly hear the bitterness behind it. "I can practically hear the small-minded folks in Forks panting in excitement."

"Jesus, Bella. What the hell did they do to you over there?" Anger flared inside me at the thought of her having to face all those people in that little podunk town, who for some reason considered her problems their past-times. It had never been like that for me. I'd lived my life in the public eye for so long now, but I'd never cared. I'd never had anyone's life in my hands, no one else but myself to care about. All of a sudden, I hated the public eye.

I had no idea what had happened to Bella while she lived in Forks, but I knew it wasn't anyone's business but her own.

She sounded tired when she answered. "_They_ did nothing to me Edward. _I_ did it all to myself. And to Maddie, and my dad, and Jake…" –she sighed- "I did some things, I made some decisions in the past, and right or wrong, now they're coming back to haunt me. So you see, when you say you'll be there for me, you have no idea what that means."

"Bella, I don't care about any of that. If and when you decide to tell me what happened, I'll be more than willing to listen, but it doesn't change…it doesn't change how I feel."

When she spoke, she sounded almost like she was surrendering. "I'm going to be gone for at least a few days. I think…it would be a good time for you to stop and think. I won't be upset at you Edward, I promise, if you want to keep things the way they are now. Your friendship means a lot to me, and you're relationship with Maddie means the world to her. I don't want to ruin either one of those."

"I _will_ be doing a lot of thinking while you're gone Bella," I answered. She was quiet. "But it won't be about what I want. I know that already. I've known it for a while."

Another long string of silence. I was starting to feel the cold chill seeping through my sweatpants and t-shirt. The five mile loop around the park had kept me warm at first. But now, sitting on this cement bench in the cool darkness and wondering if Bella would give me a chance, give _us_ a chance, I could feel my body shivering.

"If I come back-"

"When you come back," I clarified.

She half-chuckled, half snorted. "When I come back, we can talk more…if you want. I'll tell you everything then. I can only imagine what you must be thinking of me…after the things you've heard today."

"The only thing I think of when I see you with Maddie is what a strong, beautiful and loving mother you are. Anything else you want to tell me beyond that is up to you, and I know it won't change that impression."

I didn't want to push her. I knew she wouldn't be able to focus on the possibility of 'us' with this hearing going on. And honestly, I agreed with her. I didn't want to do this over the phone. I wanted her in front of me when I told her how I felt about her. I wanted to show her. I wanted her to see it in my eyes. And Jesus, I wanted to kiss her. I needed to feel her soft lips finally melding with mine. I needed to lose my hands in her dark hair and pull her towards me and feel her warm body pressed up against mine. God, just the thought of a kiss with Bella was enough to get me worked up. For a second, I wondered if _this_ stand at attention had anything to do with the self-induced dry spell I had going on. I shook my head, knowing full well that had nothing to do with it.

"When are you leaving?" I asked, resigned to stay behind, for now.

"Tomorrow morning. Alice is giving us a ride to the airport."

There was no way I wasn't going see her before she left.

"Let me take you to the airport."

"Edward, you have to go to the office."

"One of the perks of being one of the bosses is being able to come and go as you please."

She chuckled. "I don't know…" I heard her take in a breath. "Still got your cap and sunglasses?"

I smiled. "Yup. They're tucked away in the car's glove compartment." Scowling again as I thought of the dumb ass that had just snapped my picture, I made a mental note to upgrade my disguise.

"Well, alright then. I'll call Alice and let her know."

"Everything'll be fine Bella. You'll see." I tried to convince myself of the truth of my words as much as I was trying to convince her. "You and Maddie'll be back next week, and everything'll go back to normal."

"I hope you're right," she breathed, before we said goodbye and ended the call.

When I got back upstairs to my apartment, a message from Alice awaited me.

"What's up?" I asked when she answered her phone.

"What the hell is going on Edward? Why didn't you call me and tell me what happened this morning? Why do I have to hear from Rose that Bella had a family emergency and had to leave? Why do I have to hear from Bella that you knew all about it and didn't even bother to call me and tell me?"

I rolled my eyes while I waited for my sister to come up for air.

"I'm sorry Secret Agent Cullen. I guess I forgot to make my nightly covert phone call to report Bella's every move."

"Edward, you know that's not what I mean." She was quiet for a few moments, surprising for her. "I'm just…really worried. I love those two." I smiled into the phone, not at all surprised at how quickly she'd come to feel that way. "And Maddie, she reminds me so much of me at that age."

"First of all Alice, how could you remember yourself at that age? Second, God help Maddie if she's anything like you."

"Oh shut the hell up. She's just like me and you know it. Sweet and pretty and talented."

I snorted.

We settled on a time for me to stop and pick her up in the morning. I would've been fine with her not coming along at all, but considering the talk Bella and I had just had over the phone, I didn't want to risk making her uncomfortable if only I came to the airport with her. She said she wanted to wait until she came back to discuss anything further, and I'd abide by her wishes, even if it killed me.

Alice said Bella had told her she was going to call Rosalie and let her know what was going on, and that she wouldn't be at work for the next few days. I could imagine how nuts Rose was going to go when she found out Bella would be missing the Cartwright Presentation next week. I could only hope she'd find her heart under all those layers of designer clothes and realize the meeting was nothing in the face of what Bella was going through now. But freakin' Rose had been PMSing so much lately, I had no idea how she'd react.

The next morning Alice and I parked in front of Bella's apartment.

"Come on," Alice jerked her head towards the building as she opened the car door, signaling for me to follow.

Alice rang the downstairs doorbell and Bella buzzed us in. My heart begun beating a little quicker as we entered the small elevator and Alice pressed three. She appeared familiar with the surroundings. I wondered how often she visited Bella.

As we exited the elevator and Alice quickly made a right turn down the hallway, she mentioned nonchalantly, "I'm here about two to three times a week."

"Good for you," I answered, not even stopping to wonder how she'd known what I was thinking. That was just Alice.

I pressed my finger to the doorbell, hoping she didn't see the slight shiver that ran down my spine when Bella called out "Coming!"

She opened the door and looked slightly surprised when she saw me there with Alice.

"Edward," she smiled, "I wasn't expecting you to come up." She blushed nervously. "I mean, not that I mind, I just-"

Just then, Maddie peeked her head out from behind her mom.

"Edwood! You came up to see me!" She flung herself at me and wrapped her small arms around my legs.

My own arms instinctively moved around her small shoulders. "Good morning princess," I chuckled.

Quickly, she dropped her arms and tugged me by the hand, making Bella move out of the way quickly. I gave her an apologetic look that I was entering her apartment without her invitation, but she just smiled.

"Come see my room Edwood! You can see my pictures that I dwew, and the pretty pictures mommy painted on my walls, and the dream catcha Uncoe Jake gave me. I'm going to see him today, and my grampa Charlie!" Maddie quickly led me down a narrow corridor to a door and flung it open quickly.

The first thing I saw was a huge mural painted on the left wall. A sparkling white castle stood shimmering in the center of a bright green forest full of deer, rabbits, squirrels and all sorts of woodland creatures. One solitary unicorn stood to the side of the castle, his horn pointed down and one front leg bent slightly. Next to the mythical creature stood a little princess in a flowing pink tutu glittering with jewels and flowers. Her long brown hair cascaded in ringlets down her back and her feet were pointed out in one of those poses I'd seen Alice in so many times. Her small, caramel face was identical to that of the little princess holding on to my hand tightly and looking up at me through huge, brown eyes.

"Do you like it?" she asked expectantly.

I picked her up in my arms. "Is that you princess?" I asked, pointing to the painting.

"Uh huh," she nodded proudly. "My mommy painted that fuh me, because I missed dancing in the fahwest. But now I don't miss it so much anymore, because I get to dance with Ally and my fwends, but I still like to look at it. And today I'm going to see the fahwest again!" she clapped happily.

I couldn't help grinning at her excitement, even though I couldn't share her exuberance over her trip. I looked over at the mural again.

"Beautiful isn't it?" I heard Alice's voice from behind me and turned to find her and Bella standing by the door.

"You did this?" I asked Bella. I'd already known she was a great artist, but this was different. Nowadays, a lot of the graphic work done in advertising was electronic, and while talent played a huge part, there were programs that could do much of the work for you. But this…this mural was a true, hand drawn work of art.

She nodded sheepishly.

"It's perfect," I murmured, taking in all the small details, the blended green hues of the forest, the soft lines of the trees, the perfect dimensions of the unicorn, the chocolate shade of the dancing princess' eyes.

"Thanks," she whispered, a slight blush rising to her cheeks.

"And I dwew those!" Maddie exclaimed, pointing to her door. A large cork board held a few of her own works of art. She leaned towards them and I walked us closer.

"That one's of me and mommy having dinnuh, and that one's of me in Ally's ballet class, and that one's of me and Grampa and Uncoe Jake fishing" - and then with sparkling eyes she turned to me before pointing to the last picture – "and do you see that one theuh?"

She pointed at a picture of a little stick figure girl with long dark hair lying on a bed while a stick figure man with messy reddish brown hair sat next to her, with something on his lap.

"That one's of you reading me a bed-time story."

I stared at the picture, slightly speechless. Before I could think of anything to say, I heard Bella's voice behind me.

"Maddie honey, we have to go or we'll miss our flight." I looked at Bella and noticed her cheeks had flushed even redder.

"Where's the luggage Bella?" Alice asked once we were all in Bella's small living room.

Bella pointed at two small carry-ons propped up by the front door. "They're right there."

"Where's the rest of it?" Alice questioned in confusion.

"That's it. That's all there is."

Alice looked at the two bags incredulously. "That's _all _you're taking? God, that's not even enough room for my make up."

Bella rolled her eyes and went for the bags.

I reached them first and picked them up in one hand while still cradling Maddie in my other arm. "I've got it."

"Thanks Edward," Bella smiled, grabbing on to the bag's handles. "But they're not that big. I can manage them."

I smirked, seeing her independent streak rear its head. Though with what I'd learned in the past twenty-four hours, it was easier to understand why she was always struggling to prove how self-sufficient she was.

"I know you can manage Bella," I said, gently yet firmly tugging the bags away from her, "but I'm here. You don't have to do it on your own." I held her eyes in mine, hoping she understood what I meant. She stared at me for a moment, a hesitant look on her face, before letting go of the bags.

"Thanks," she murmured.

We arrived at JFK quickly; morning rush hour on the Belt Parkway had mostly died down by the time we left for the airport.

Bella checked herself and Maddie in with the airline, and then there was nothing left to do but wait.

The three of us sat in a quiet corner of one of the waiting areas before Security, while Maddie flitted around excitedly, looking forward to the airplane ride. Alice and Bella did what I supposed was the usual girl talk thing, with Alice jumping up every few seconds on her chair whenever Bella said anything that excited her, which didn't take much with Alice. Bella sat with her legs folded in front of her and her arms encircling them, but they bounced up and down nervously. Though she was trying her best to let Alice distract her, I could tell that she was nervous. It would be a six hour flight to Seattle, during which she'd have more than enough time to think. I sighed quietly as I watched her, wishing I could just reach over, take her in my arms and stop her nervous bouncing.

The airport wasn't very busy at this time of morning, but still, I hadn't wanted to risk being spotted by the crazies, or worse, by the paparazzi again. My conversation with Bella last night had left me aware of another change I had to make, and I'd added a large, dark hoodie to my cap and shades. I pulled the hoodie up higher and hoped the baggie jeans I wore completed my everyday 'guy from the hood' look. I'd never really made an effort at making myself un-noticeable.

Bella looked over at me and laughed, her eyes sparkling in amusement. "You know, you're not fooling anyone with that getup. One good look at you and all these tourists will be in camera-flashin' heaven."

I put on a hurt face. "You don't think I look all that?" I asked, tilting my head and putting both hands up in front of me pointed at each other with only my pinky and ring fingers down, in my best imitation of a homeboy pose.

She laughed harder this time, throwing her head back and rocking backwards with her arms still encircling her legs. For a second, she looked so carefree, and it felt so damn good to know I could make her forget her problems, even if just for a short moment.

"Oh please Edward. As if you don't know that you're _all that_," she said, imitating my pose and making me laugh this time. "Do you honestly think all those newspapers and magazines would trip over each other to get a picture of you if you weren't so...easy on the eyes?"

I arched an eyebrow, but I wasn't sure if she could see it through my shades. "Easy on the eyes?"

She grinned sheepishly and looked away, blushing furiously.

This reaction only encouraged me. "Easy on the eyes?" I asked again, leaning over to her. "What exactly do you mean by, 'easy on the eyes?'

She turned back to look at me with a mischievous expression, and I held my breath as I waited anxiously to hear what she was going to say. But before she could answer, Alice giggled loudly. For a minute there, I'd forgotten about her, and by the way Bella's blush deepened, I got the feeling she had too.

"Bella, please stop giving him a bigger head than he already has." She turned to me and flicked a finger at my hooded head.

"Ow, you little witch! That hurt!"

Alice laughed. "Big freakin' baby. Easy on the eyes?" she repeated, laughing. "Easy on the eyes is the last thing you are right now. You look like Eminem exploded all over you."

I glared at her.

"Easy on eyes," she laughed again, shaking her head.

I scowled and leaned back into my seat, mumbling. "Dumb witch."

"What'd you say there Slim Shady?" Alice asked.

I ignored her. But Bella was laughing hard by now. "I swear, watching you two together is enough to distract anyone for a few minutes. You're like the sibling version of Abbott and Costello."

Alice elbowed me. "Wanna do our impression of 'Who's on First?'"

I pursed my lips and turned away from her, irritated that she'd ruined my moment with Bella. I wondered what she'd been about to say, and was still pretty shocked she'd basically told me she thought I was good-looking. I mean, I knew the opposite sex tended to find me attractive, but hearing Bella say it was something else entirely.

Alice turned her attention back to Bella. "Now you make sure you call and keep us informed about what's going on," Alice reminded Bella once again.

"I will Alice. I promise."

"And Rose says to tell you not to worry about that big meeting you guys have next week. She says you've got it in the bag, and since you finished up all the graphic thingies or whatever, they've just gotta finish organizing the presentation."

Bella smiled, but her jean-clad legs were doing the nervous bouncing thing again. "Tell her I said thanks."

"And she says Emmett says to let him know if you need someone to go do some ass-kicking up there."

Bella laughed again, but I frowned. What the fuck, if she needed someone for that, I could do it just as well as he.

"And Jasper said he'd help."

I rolled my eyes.

Bella looked at her watch. "Well, I guess we'd better be heading through security. It might take a while."

Alice sighed. "Okay." She stood up and walked over to Maddie and picked her up, giving her a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek and telling her she'd miss her and would see her next week. When she put her down, I moved over to Maddie.

I took off my stupid glasses and knelt in front of her, putting my hands on her little shoulders until her big brown eyes met mine. I wasn't going to say good-bye. That, in my mind, wasn't even a possibility. I wouldn't even think it. And it wasn't denial. I just knew there was no way in hell I would allow that to happen.

"Now you listen to your mommy on the airplane okay?"

"Okay."

"And you make sure you wear your seatbelt like a good little girl. Even when the seatbelt light goes off, you keep it on anyway, okay?"

"Okay."

I drew in a deep breath. "I'll see you in a few days, princess."

Her little brows furrowed and she scrunched up her cute little button nose. "Edwood, why do you always call me pwincess?"

"Because that's what you are."

"Grampa calls me Maddie Mo, Uncoe Jake calls me Mad girl, and everyone else calls me Maddie."

"I won't call you princess if you don't want me to."

"No! Peeeeez! Peez don't stop calling me pwincess! I like it! No one else calls me that."

I chuckled. "Okay then. You'll be your grampa's Maddie Mo, Uncle Jake's Mad girl," I said, trying not to roll my eyes at the stupid nickname, "and my little princess."

"Yaaay!" she cried and threw her little arms around my neck. "Edwood, you're my very best fwend evuh!"

I swallowed thickly and held her tight for a few seconds before releasing her. "You're my best friend too princess. Take good care of yourself, and of your mommy."

"I will."

"Maddie, come over her for a second honey. I've got something to show you," Alice called out. Maddie skipped over to her. I looked up at Alice and she met my gaze, jerking her head in Bella's direction before taking Maddie's hand and walking with her towards the duty-free shop. "How 'bout a nice bar of Toblerone for the flight?" I heard her offering.

I stood up and turned to Bella. She was watching me with a funny expression on her face. We approached each other slowly.

"Please call me when you get there Bella. Just so I'll know you arrived safely."

She was silent for a few seconds.

"If you're sure you want me to Edward. Like I said, you've done so much for us already. You don't need to…you don't _have_ to involve yourself in this any further." I could hear her unspoken words.

I reached out and grabbed her hand, feeling goose bumps rise all over me when she let me, and even tightened her grip slightly, sending little shock waves - like thousands of pins prickling my skin - all the way up my arm.

"Bella, I'm going to have a hard enough time functioning for the next few days. Please try to keep me informed of what's going on. I need to at least know you're _both_ okay."

I hoped she heard _my_ unspoken words. Not that I'd have any problem speaking them right now. I only held back for her.

"Okay then, I'll call you," she whispered.

"Take care of yourself...and of Maddie."

"I will."

"Tell her…tell her I'll have her sparkly dance tights waiting for her when she comes back."

Bella chuckled. "I will."

"I'll be waiting for your call."

"I'll call you soon," she promised.

I smiled, despite the fact that I wouldn't be seeing her for at least a few days. I refused to think beyond that.

Her mesmerizing dark eyes looked up, practically hypnotizing me as soon as I looked into them. Her long eyelashes fluttered softly, and I found that even if I'd wanted to, I couldn't have made myself look away. It was as if I was under some spell, but not a bad one. One that had me trapped in the most wonderful of ways, trapped in her gaze, in the deep pools of chocolate I saw in my nightly dreams and in my day dreams as well, every single day of my life since I'd met her.

And suddenly I couldn't wait any longer. Any attempt I'd been making to resist, to hold back, melted away in those eyes. With my heart beating so loudly in my chest that I was momentarily worried airport security would come after me, I leaned into her slowly, unable to stop myself. Had she pulled away, I would've made myself stop; I would've dug as deep as I had to and found the strength to pull back. But she didn't pull away. She stood frozen, her wide eyes moving between my eyes and my lips, but she remained perfectly still.

Yet as I drew in closer, I thought of what she'd said on the phone yesterday. She had enough things going on right now. We'd figure out this thing between us when she came back. And as much as I was dying to kiss her, to feel her against me and whisper in her ear that I didn't need time or explanations, at the same time, I didn't want to pressure her. It wasn't for me that I was holding back, it was for her.

The old Edward would've said fuck it, and thrown caution to the wind. But I didn't want to be the old Edward. I needed to be someone better, someone worthy of this woman and her daughter.

With a new resolve in place and no fucking clue where the hell I was getting the strength for it, I moved my lips to her forehead and placed a soft kiss there, and God, even that felt better than anything. She was so unbelievably warm and soft, and I could smell the scent of strawberries wafting around her hair. I closed my eyes, resisting the almost unbearable urge to pull her into me and bury my head between her neck and her hair and inhale, and heard her sigh softly; relief no doubt, that I hadn't gone against her wishes.

"Be safe," I murmured, pulling back slowly and meeting her eyes again. Her expression puzzled me; I could've sworn she looked almost disappointed. But her eyes changed suddenly, became deeper, more…determined. Her gaze moved from my eyes to my lips again, and one second I was watching her bite down on her lip, the next, those lips were on mine.

The electric shock that coursed through my body in that moment was mind-blowing. It was as if I'd been jolted by a live wire. As if every nerve ending in my body had been awakened. Every part of my body tingled in that instant, from the roots of my head, to the tips of my fingers, to the soles of my feet, and God, I didn't even want to think what else. And in the next millisecond, every single one of those nerves traveled with searing heat to my lips, until the rest of me became numb and the only part of my body that I was aware of were the lips that were being lightly traced by Bella's lips.

At first, her touch was as light as a feather, just a couple of slow, maybe even hesitant brushes of her warm mouth on mine. Before I could react, she pulled back ever so slowly, as if she were ending the kiss. And even though that would've been enough to keep me up all night, she shocked me even more by meeting my lips again, this time with hers parted just enough so that the very tip of her tongue grazed between my lips for a fraction of a second. And this time when she pulled away, her lips gently pulled mine with her as she backed away and brought her lips together again.

My legs almost buckled out from under me and I was left standing there breathless, in disbelief, and more than a little light-headed. I was grateful that her hand was still in mine, holding on tightly.

When I was finally able to focus, I noticed her cheeks were flushed a pretty red and her lips were still slightly pouted. Her eyes flashed up to me, sparkling. "I'm sorry," she murmured quietly. "I just had to." And then she turned and loosened her grip.

But I didn't loosen mine as I waited for her to face me again. "Don't ever apologize to me Bella," I said, when she met my eyes hesitantly. I gave her a crooked smile. "Especially not for _that._"

She gave me a shy smile. "Goodbye Edward."

I took her chin in my hand. "Hey. It's not goodbye." She bit her lip. "I promise you. It's not goodbye," I whispered intently. And then she smiled and nodded, and slowly walked away.

***** A/N: So, I hope that little kiss made up for the long wait, at least a little bit.**

**Okay, like I said, next chapter will still be from Edward's POV. Hope you guys don't mind too much.**

**And please, don't hate Rose for telling Edward off. She's been around him for a long time and she's seen him in action. Some people just have a harder time detecting a change in others, especially since she's got her own stuff going on right now, which we will be getting into later. But go ahead and feel free to hate Tanya as much as you want. Yes, she will be trouble.**

**So let me know what you think is going to happen with the hearing. Are we anxious to see Paul? or would we rather do without him? Let me know what you guys think happened between him and Bella (I'm curious to hear what you're all imagining.) I promise, the whole truth will be out in the next couple of chapters.**

**Reviews are better than watching Edward pull up his shirt to dry the sweat off his face (well, no, they're not really better than that! But they're pretty good anyway)!**


	11. Chapter 10 Hero

**A/N: Um, hello? Hi everyone. I'd like to greet the newest members to our little family here. Since last week, we've had a large influx of newbies to this story, and I want to thank each and every one of you. I've been truly amazed by your feedback, and am seriously happy you've enjoyed the story so far. From what I gather, this story got rec'd by ****LadyExcalibur2010**** on her story 'The Bigger They Are,' which is an amazing piece of fic, by the way. Thank you so much LadyEx, and if I can bring even a fraction of the number of readers you brought my way to you, it still won't be enough thanks. So welcome one and all, and I hope I don't disappoint too much.**

**For those of you who've been with me for a while, you guys have probably figured out by now that sometimes when I start writing, things grow bigger than I expected them to. That's what happened with this chapter. So...you'll have to bare with me through one more chappy from Edwood's POV after this, and then we should get back to Bella. The good news is that the next chapter is mostly done, so you shouldn't have to wait two weeks for it; it'll hopefully be up in less than a week (as long as my BB Danna can do her magic with it)!**

**Thanks to my lovely Beta Danna0724, still loving you lots girl.**

**And thanks to my reader ****twisagafan**** who guided me through the legal mumbo jumbo for this chapter. Hope I got it all straight, but just as a reminder, I am not a legal expert, and I tried to keep things as true to life as possible. Please bare with me.**

**All characters belong to S. Meyer, I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 10**** – Hero**

**Song Rec. – Hero, by Enrique Iglesias **

Bella and I sat stiffly on the uncomfortable chairs behind the small, rectangular wood table. From underneath, out of the watchful eyes of the rest of the court room, I took one of her hands, trying to offer her some encouragement. When she looked up at me, the terrified expression on her beautiful face sent a ripple of pain through my heart. Nevertheless, I tried to muster up a confident smile. It was all I could offer her at the moment.

If Bella was my beauty, Maddie was my princess; she sat quietly on a chair in the middle of the large, imposing courtroom, swinging her small legs playfully back and forth, blissfully unaware of what the next few minutes might bring. For that much, at least, I was grateful. Her long brown hair draped her tiny porcelain face as she looked down to whisper something in the ear of Angie, the little ballerina doll that accompanied her everywhere. Someone had placed Maddie's chair between where Bella and I sat, and where _he_ - Paul Forrester - sat.

Jenks, furiously scribbling notes on the other side of me, leaned in to whisper, "The judge is on his way. Get ready." I nodded once and adjusted the buttons on my suit.

We all stood quickly once the judge walked into the courtroom. Bella's grip on my hand tightened.

I had a hard time hearing what the judge was saying. His voice droned like a far away echo, like a dull horn. Confused, my eyes strayed to the rest of the courtroom - to the transcriber typing away furiously; to the tall bailiff standing rigidly to the side of the empty witness stand – before stopping on the rectangular table directly across from where Bella, Jenks and I stood.

Paul Forrester and his Counselor. The asshole threatening to take away the little girl that - along with her mother - had in the last few weeks become the center of my universe.

_Over my dead body fucker._

I tried to focus on Paul's face, to read him. What was motivating him? What was in his eyes? Did he really want to be a part of his daughter's life, or was this all just a desperate attempt to trap a woman who no longer wanted him? But Paul Forrester's eyes - as well as the rest of his face - were as blurred to me as the judge's voice was muffled. I squinted, but I just couldn't get my eyes to focus.

Despite my distorted vision, I could _feel_ _him_ looking right at me. I could _feel_ the hatred, the absence of conscience seething like a dark poison out of every pore in his tall, dark frame. Some sixth-sense also told me that the mother-fucker was definitely sneering, confident that he'd walk out of this court room the victor.

He'd have to get through me first.

The abrupt fury burning in my bones distorted my vision further, and suddenly the entire court room was just a hazy fog. Blood pulsed wildly in my temples, adrenaline rushed through my veins. My body stiffened and my free hand clenched at my side. I bit my lip, hard, fighting the instinct to turn to the judge and yell "fuck you all" before grabbing Bella and Maddie and booking it the hell out of there. I tried to control the maddening impulse to rush over to the blurry faced man and connect my fist to his face, effectively wiping the invisible, smug sneer off.

A warm hand abruptly tightened around mine, breaking me out the rage and reminding me why it was important to stay calm. I looked down and Bella shook her head slightly, as if to say, 'not now.' I forced my attention back to the judge.

"…therefore, this court has determined that full custody of Madisen Swan, daughter of Isabella Swan and Paul Forrester, should be handed over to her biological father. Isabella Swan will be granted visitation rights on a temporary basis, until a more permanent schedule is determined by this court…"

"No!" Bella screamed, and before anyone moved, I'd swept Maddie out of her chair and was holding her between us, holding both of them tightly to me with my head buried in between them.

Jenks voice sounded from somewhere behind me. "Edward, you have to let them go. The judge has made his ruling. They're not yours; neither one of them. They never were, and they never will be."

I knew it was true. But God, I couldn't let go of either one of them. I just couldn't.

Someone snickered. "Yeah Eddie boy. They're not yours. _They're mine; both of them_."

My head shot up, searching for the culprit, but my eyes were met by Bella's agonized gaze. "Edward, I can't leave her. If she stays with him, I stay too."

"No," I whispered, my dry mouth barely able to form the word. "Please, no."

My eyes swept the entire courtroom then, and I was startled to find some of my family here. Alice stood off to the side by herself, watching me through large, swollen eyes.

"Edward, I'm so sorry. I guess I was wrong about you and Bella."

Further behind her stood Rose and my father, shaking their heads at me.

"Edward, let them go son. You wouldn't know how to take care of them; how to be the man they need you to be."

"No. I _can_ be the man they need," I hissed.

"I told you Edward. There are consequences to your actions. But no, you had to do things your way," Rosalie smirked.

The rest of their words were completely lost on me though, because a soft, frightened little voice caught my attention. I looked down and my eyes locked onto a sweet, caramel face with big brown eyes.

"Peez, peez don't make me go with him," Maddie - my princess - begged, holding on to my arms with all the might a four-year old little girl could possibly muster. A lump formed in my throat; an unbearable tightness gripped my chest. "Peez daddy, don't make me go with that man. I want to stay with you and mommy."

And suddenly, nothing else mattered. Not the judge's insanely fucked-up ruling, not the bailiff glaring at me, daring me to defy the judge's orders, not my own father's lack of faith in me, and most definitely not fucking Paul Forrester.

All that mattered were the woman and the little girl in my arms.

I bent down and placed a kiss on her forehead. "You're not going anywhere with him Maddie," I promised. Paul snorted, but I ignored him while the indescribable joy I felt at what Maddie'd just called me waged an internal battle with the indescribable need to put my fist through his mouth.

"Daddy'll keep you safe," I vowed, the determination in my voice unwavering. Bella and Maddie were my priorities. First I had to make sure they were safe; I'd beat the shit out of Paul afterwards.

When a hand suddenly gripped my shoulder, my first thought was 'Do you mind? I'm having a moment here with my daughter,' before the anger returned.

"Time to stop playing house Cullen. Get the fuck away from my family."

With the last of my self-control, I shook his grip off of me. I turned to Bella and handed over Maddie to her.

"You and Maddie go sit with my father." Although not exactly at the top of my favorite persons list right now, I knew he'd take care of them. After all, I'd inherited my protective instincts from him.

"But-"

"Go."

Once they were with my dad, I turned around.

The burning fury that had only licked at the corners of my mind before now took center stage and morphed into a mind-blowing, blinding rage. Blood boiled in my veins; adrenaline pumped through my body so hard and fast that I felt as if I were about to explode. My vision turned to red; like a bull ready to charge, and when my eyes moved to the motherfucker trying to destroy our lives, I narrowed my glare, forcing my focus on his blurry face.

Bull's Eye.

I stalked towards him. "Your family?" I hissed. "_Your _family?" His mouth turned up in a sneer, still stupid enough to try and mock me. "They are _not_ your family," I snarled. "_You_ gave them up a long time ago. _You_ didn't want them." My chest heaved; my hands curled into fists. "_They're my family now. _And you're not taking them away."

He laughed then. A maniacal laugh that did away with any semblance of restraint I had left, and suddenly my fist was smashing his face. From behind me, I heard Bella scream and my father begging me to stop, but I couldn't stop. This fucker wasn't taking _my family_ away from me; not now, not ever.

"They're mine!" I growled, hearing the crack of his jaw under my fist.

"They're mine!" I repeated. Somehow, faceless fucker still managed to laugh again.

"Mine!" I repeated, delivering more blows to his face, his ribs, anywhere and everywhere. He kept on laughing.

"Mine!"

"Mine!"

"Mine!"

I sat straight up, gasping for air against the cold darkness of my bedroom. A thin sheen of sweat covered my bare chest, dripping down my abs and glistening in the streaming moonlight through the window. I shivered.

"Fuck," I groaned, running my fingers through my dampened hair. I took a deep breath, letting it out in one large gust, and tried to calm my racing heart. I could hear it beating wildly in my chest, louder than the car horns beeping relentlessly outside my window.

"Fuck." I threw myself back against the pillows, using one arm to cover my face. It was the second time in as many nights that I'd had this nightmare. I snorted, wondering what ever happened to the nocturnal dreams I used to have, the ones that left me with a racing heart and a stiffy instead of a racing heart and dark circles under my eyes. I'd slept so little in the past few days I was starting to look like a fucking vampire.

I looked at the clock; the bright green glowing digits flashing three forty-three in the morning. I groaned again, very awake and knowing there was no way in hell I was falling asleep any time in the near future. With a final grunt, I lifted myself off the bed and stalked into the bathroom to wash the sweat off of me.

I squinted when the light came on in the bathroom, scowling impatiently while my eyes adjusted. I played with the temperature of the shower, waiting for the steam to rise before throwing off my boxers and jumping in, slamming the shower door behind me. Once in, I let the hot water pound against me, turning my face up into the spray and letting the water slide down my shoulders and my chest, slowly washing away the stress of the night. After a couple of minutes, I turned under the shower and lowered my head, letting the flow of water massage the back of my neck now. With a sigh of frustration brought on by the recurring nightmares, as well as by the knowledge of what tomorrow could possibly bring, I let my forehead rest against the cool, marble tiles of the wall.

My mind trailed back to Bella. It was almost one in the morning on the other side of the country, in a little rainy town called Forks in the State of Washington. I wondered what she was doing, if she was doing a better job at sleeping than I was. I doubted it; not tonight. I drew in a deep breath and picked up the bar of soap, scrubbing myself roughly while my mind replayed every detail from the past few days.

My cell phone vibrated just as I'd been letting myself into my apartment. I pulled it out quickly, but made sure to check Caller ID before answering. My mouth turned up in a wide grin. It had been one long god-damned day.

"Bella," I breathed, unable to disguise the relief in my voice.

"Hey Edward," she answered, and maybe it was just wishful thinking, but I thought I detected the same kind of relief in her voice.

"Are you and Maddie okay? Did the flight go well?" I threw my bag and keys on the small table by the door and walked straight through towards the balcony, sliding the glass door open quickly and stepping out into the cool, evening air.

"Yes, we're fine. The flight was okay. Maddie behaved pretty well through most of it, though I had to take away the Toblerone bar Alice bought her half-way through the flight, when she started bouncing in her seat and opening and closing the tray in front of her like there was no tomorrow. Alice is gonna pay for that one when she has her own kids. Who the heck gives a four-year old a giant chocolate bar ten minutes before a six-hour flight?"

I couldn't help chuckling. "Alice does, that's who. So other than a slightly hyper four-year-old, everything else went fine?"

"Mm hmm. It's been a long day though. We just got in a little while ago."

"What's Maddie doing?" I felt a sharp pang, knowing I wouldn't be seeing her sweet little face for a few days. _No more than a few days_, I told myself.

"She's inside with my dad and Jake. She'll be keeping them busy with her stories for a while, so I figured I'd come outside and breathe in some fresh mountain air and…call you. I hope you weren't busy-"

"Bella, stop asking me that. I'm never too busy for you. You should know that by now." She remained silent, which of course, puzzled me no fucking end. I would've thought after the way we said good-bye at the airport, she'd know she and Maddie were my priorities.

"Jay Jenks called me," she said, as if she were trying to change the subject. "He wants to meet with me Sunday, so we can go over everything before the week starts."

"Good. Get all your stuff together, meet with him, and then I'm sure he'll tell you that everything's going to be fine." _And then you and Maddie can come back…home…to me._

"I hope you're right. I want this over with as quickly as possible."

A sudden thought occurred to me. "Bella, your ex-husband, would he come looking for you-" My hand involuntarily tightened around the phone.

Bella half-chuckled. "Paul's not that stupid. He won't come near my dad's house. He knows the Chief would shoot first and ask questions later. And besides, he wouldn't…not with Jake around…"

In some deep part of me, the part that was trying really hard to be a decent guy, I knew that regardless of what that meant, I should've been glad that Bella's ex-husband apparently wouldn't try anything as long as Jake was around. But the rest of me, especially the jealous fuck that hadn't existed until I met Bella, couldn't help the way my grip tightened around the phone even more, until I could hear the thin metal of my cell protesting under my hand.

"I'm glad you have someone there to protect you and Maddie." I cringed once the words were out, not because I didn't mean them, but because although I'd really fucking tried, I knew I hadn't been able to hide the tone of jealousy underlying the words.

"Edward…" – she took a breath – "Jake, he means the world to me, and he's been there for me through a lot. But…even though things between he and I are kind of…confusing right now, he's just my friend."

I wanted to ask what exactly that meant. Friends had so many meanings nowadays. There were college friends, and work friends, old friends and new friends, casual friends, friends with benefits…

And then she'd said he had something to do with the whole paternity issue…

I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath. Bella wouldn't be the type to have those kinds of friends. Besides, I reminded myself, this was exactly what she'd meant when she'd said there'd be things she wouldn't be able to answer right now. Later, but not now.

"Bella, just- be safe. Take care of yourself and take care of Maddie. That's all I care about."

"I will. Edward I-" she started saying something and then stopped abruptly. "Coming dad!" she yelled out. "Um, I've gotta go actually."

"Oh. Okay."

She huffed. "I'll call you in a few days?"

I would've preferred sooner, but I didn't want her to think that after one kiss I thought I owned her.

"Call me whenever you get a chance. Let me know what's going on, okay?"

"I will."

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"Everything's going to be fine."

I heard her draw in a deep breath. "Okay."

"And Bella?"

"Yes?"

"I'll be…thinking about you. And Maddie."

"We'll be thinking about you too."

"One more thing Bella."

I heard her chuckle once. "Yes?"

"I'll be thinking about…the airport too," I breathed out quickly.

"Edward?"

"Yes?"

"I'll be remembering that too. A lot."

And I couldn't help the huge grin that erupted on my face.

"I'll call you soon," she promised. I wouldn't push her for more.

"Alright then."

"Bye Edward."

"Bye Bella."

The next day crawled by, and by Sunday, I was more than just a little stir crazy, so I took my mother up on her offer and went up to Long Island for the weekend.

Esme prepared one of her delicious dinners, and afterwards, we all went into the snug theater room to suffer through our heart-burn in front of the large screen TV. My father lit the large fireplace; Esme and Carlisle lived right off the water, and over here, you could feel the crisp fall nights much more than in the city. Emmett and Rose had brought a boot-leg movie to watch, and halfway through, my mother left her spot next to my father and quietly made her way to me.

I turned to glance at her, smiling, before turning my eyes back to the movie. Not that I was paying much attention. It was the third installment in one of the vampire sagas that were so popular lately and, while the lead actress was cute, she couldn't act her way out of a Cracker Jack box.

My mother reached out and brushed a few strands of hair off of my forehead.

"How are you doing Edward?" she whispered.

"I'm good mom," I whispered back, keeping my eyes on the screen.

"I hear things have been hectic at work."

"Yeah, you know how it is. Come fall everyone's getting ready for their spring campaigns, come spring, everyone starts getting the fall campaigns ready. Yada, yada." I shrugged.

"Hmmm," she hummed with raised eyebrows, trying hard to feign interest. I chuckled.

"It makes me really happy to see you more lately." I smiled and took her hand across the seat. I knew I hadn't been the best son to her for the past few years. She'd always been a great mother to me and my siblings.

"Your uncle tells me you said you might not make the charity auction this week?" Esme was big with charity auctions. She sat on the board of several, and ever since I could remember, she'd been involved in running or organizing some sort of benefit.

I shrugged again. "I don't know." I thought about how my uncle had suggested I invite Bella to the auction. I pursed my lips and shook my head, thinking how there wasn't a chance in hell of that happening now; not with thousands of miles between us.

"What?" my mother asked, having caught my head shake.

"What?"

"Why'd you shake your head?"

"What? Oh. Nothing. I was just uh…thinking that if I was the guy in this movie I would've thrown the dirty mutt out of that tent hours ago," I said, jerking my chin towards the screen.

"Oh," Esme nodded, turning her eyes to the large TV. "Well, you know, he's a good friend to her."

"Pshh," I snorted. "He just wants to get in her pants."

"Edward!" she hissed, shoving my arm with her hand. She tried to hide a smile.

I chuckled. "Sorry mom, but it's the truth."

She was quiet for a few minutes, and I thought she'd turned her attention back to the movie.

"My brother also tells me he had an interesting conversation with you last week on the yacht."

"Did he now? What exactly did he say?"

"Not much. Just that from the way you sounded, he's confident that Tanya and you were permanently over this time, thank God. Not that I mean to judge," she said quickly, putting one hand up apologetically, "but honestly honey, you could do so much better.

She was so wrong for you." She shook her head vigorously. "And he also said that…"

"That what?" I asked, turning to her with a raised eyebrow.

"Really, nothing more. It was just the way…it just looked as if there might've been more."

Uncle Aro was turning into a gossipy old lady in his forties. Thank God it seemed he hadn't said anything about the lawyer for Bella.

As if on cue, Esme cleared her throat and asked, "How's Bella?"

I turned and narrowed my eyes at my mother. "What do you mean?"

She gave me a confused look. "It's not a trick question my love. How's Bella? We're all pretty worried. Alice says the hearing's on Wednesday?"

I looked at her suspiciously. "Yeah, I spoke to her the night she left, but I haven't heard from her since."

"Well, she must be really busy over there."

"Yeah, I think she probably is."

"I really hope everything goes well. They've both become really special to this family."

"Yeah mom. I know they have."

Her eyes narrowed. She watched me through her green eyes the way only a mother can. "And you?"

"And me what?"

She opened her mouth, but then hesitated. When she spoke, I was pretty sure she'd meant to say something else.

"And you're okay?"

"Yes mom. I told you. I'm fine."

She kept my eyes locked with hers for a few more seconds and then finally released me.

"Well, if there's anything you want to talk about Edward, you know your father and I are here."

I suppressed a smirk when she mentioned my father, but as always, she caught it.

"Give him a chance Edward. He's been trying harder these past few weeks. I know things were rough between you and him for a while, but believe me, he wants to fix that. He loves you very much. He always has."

"Yeah mom. Okay," I agreed, more to placate her than anything else.

My phone vibrated then, and when I saw the phone number, I excused myself quickly and flew out of the room, walking swiftly as I pressed the 'talk' button.

"Bella?"

"Hi Edward. Is this a bad time?" Her voice sounded low and somewhat shaky.

"No. No of course not," I responded while I quickly opened the front door to the house and walked out into the chilly night. I lifted my shoulders and pressed my arms against my sides, sticking my free hand in the front pocket of my pants to keep it warm. A shiver ran through my body.

"What's going on? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," she answered, but she sounded off.

"Is Maddie okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, she's fine Edward." I exhaled in relief before I heard the quiet sobs.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry Edward. I know I shouldn't keep bothering you with my problems. But I'm just so mad at myself. I just needed-" – she stopped and drew in a deep breath – "I needed to talk to…I needed to talk to…I needed,"

"It's okay Bella. Just calm down and tell me what happened."

Her words poured out fast. "I met with Jenks this afternoon and we went over the divorce papers and the paperwork my old lawyer had drawn up to terminate Paul's parental rights." She started crying harder.

"Shh. Relax Bella. Relax." I closed my eyes. Damn it, why didn't I go to Washington with her?

"What did Jenks say?" I asked, once her tears subsided.

"He did it all wrong Edward. The affidavit wasn't enough. We needed to file a petition to terminate and then present it to the court."

I had no idea what the fucking difference was, but it didn't sound good.

"So what exactly does that mean?"

"It means that in the eyes of the court, Paul has as much right over Maddie as I do and that come Wednesday…he's still legally her father," she finished in a hopeless voice.

Before I could say anything, she called out, "I'll be right there Maddie," and I could hear the strain in her voice. "Edward, can I call you back? Maddie and my dad are waiting for me. We're supposed to go out for ice cream."

"Do you want me to call you back in an hour or so?"

"Yeah, okay." She paused. "Edward, I'm sorry. I don't mean to burden you with my problems, but I can't let my dad know how frightened I am, because he's likely to put a bullet through Paul." I was having a hard time seeing what the problem with that would be. "And Jake, Jake's even worse."

I bit my lip. It wouldn't have been a good idea to let her know all the different ways I planned to mutilate her ex-husband if I ever got my hands on him.

"Bella, I told you at the airport, don't ever apologize to me. For anything. I'm glad you called me. I'm here for you, in any way you need me. We'll figure this out. Don't worry."

I told her again I'd call her back in an hour, and as soon as we hung up, I scrolled through my contacts until I found the number I needed.

"Jay Jenks here."

"Jenks. It's Edward Cullen. What the hell is going on?"

"What's going on? What's going on?" he repeated. "What's going on is that that sumbitch hillbilly lawyer Isabella used for her divorce must've gotten his degree online or something! How the hell do you not know the difference between an Affidavit and an application for termination?" He sounded as if he'd been asking himself that question all evening.

I ran my hand through my hair and slowly down my face. "So what now?"

"Well, the fact still remains that the little girl has had no contact with Forrester for over two years. And, he was well aware of the documentation to relinquish his paternal rights. That should be enough to at least grant us a temporary stay on the DNA order. Jenks remained quiet for a few moments, and I thought he was done talking. Abruptly, he continued. "Forrester's hired himself a big-shot from Seattle to handle this case for him," Jenks chuckled. I frowned, missing the joke.

"You don't sound concerned."

"Well, there's always the chance _something_ might go wrong." Fucking lawyers could never give a straight answer. "But Cullen, I've been in this business since you were in diapers. I've seen it all at this point. I've got a pretty good picture of what type of character this Forrester guy is, and I've got a few surprises up my sleeve for him."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," he began, and then hesitated.

"Look, I'm not asking you for any information that would break your confidentiality agreement, I just want to make sure you're on top of this. I just spoke to Isabella, and she sounded pretty upset." It was a weird situation. Bella was his actual client, but I was secretly footing the bill.

"Ah fuck. I guess that's my fault. I was just so pissed off at her cluster-fucking lawyer. I'm on top of it alright, though. That bumfuck did set us back a bit, but I've always got a contingency plan worked out in my head. Without getting into specifics, let's just say that Forrester isn't the most upstanding citizen."

I groaned, wondering how this shit could get any worse, but Jenks went on, perfectly at ease.

"There are a few…facts I've uncovered about Mr. Forrester that the court would be interested to know, and I'll be disclosing to his counsel tomorrow morning that I plan to present these facts in court on Wednesday. There's also years of medical and child support that haven't been paid that he has to consider if he wants any kind of access to his daughter. If Forrester really wants the little girl, he's gonna have a ton of shit to answer for first."

I thought of what Bella had said to me over the phone the other day.

_I would've never separated my daughter from a father who really loved her. _

I was silent, and Jenks laughed.

"Relax Cullen. That's what you're paying me the big bucks for. And believe me, you _will _be paying some mighty big bucks. This case is taking me away from a pretty irate rapper back in New York. He's already threatened to put a cap in my ass if I don't get him out of _his_ legal troubles."

I rolled my eyes, not interested in his problems with the hip-hop world. "What if Paul doesn't really want the child? What if it's something else he's after?"

"Well, then it depends on how badly he wants whatever it is he's after."

I let out a huge gust of air from my nose.

"Cullen, listen to me. I know this guy's type. I feel pretty confident." – There was that term again; he'd been pretty confident before and that had apparently gone to shit – "This should be enough to get him to back off. And then we can try to fix the mess Isabella's old lawyer created. File the correct paperwork and hope that once Forrester sees Isabella doesn't have a fucking retard for a lawyer anymore, he'll be more willing to cooperate. There's no guarantee he won't regroup at some point and come back with bigger guns, but there's plenty that can happen between now and then. Ms. Swan may not _always _be alone," he added.

I wasn't sure what that meant, but I didn't have time to think about it now.

"What happens if Forrester doesn't back down?"

Jenks exhaled loudly. "Then we come at him with everything we've got. But I've gotta be honest with you Cullen, if that's the case, it's very possible he'll end up with some sort of visitation rights, at the very least, until the court determines his real intentions."

I brought the phone's mouth piece closer. "You just do whatever it takes to make sure that neither Isabella nor her daughter have to deal with that asshole again," I growled. "Whatever. It. Takes."

We hung up. Even though it'd been less than a half-hour I started dialing Bella's cell.

A voice from behind startled me. "Edward, is everything okay?"

I wheeled around quickly, surprised to see my father standing just outside the door. I hit the end button on the phone.

"Everything's fine dad," I lied smoothly. "I just came out for some air."

Carlisle eyed me for a second before stretching out an arm towards me. "Yes. Your mother sent me out to give you this." He was holding my Dartmouth sweatshirt. "She says its cold and you'll get sick, even though I reminded her you don't catch a cold from the weather, but you know how she worries," he rambled. His eyes never left mine as he spoke, and I could tell that, although his voice was as calm and composed as always, he'd caught some part of my phone conversation.

I reached for his outstretched hand. "Thanks," I said, keeping my face as blank as possible. I pulled the sweatshirt over my head and hoped that by the time my head popped out he'd be gone. No such luck.

"Downright frigid tonight, isn't it?" he said, blowing into his hands and rubbing them together. He'd moved closer to me.

I stuck my hands in my pockets, gripping my cell phone anxiously. I needed to call Bella back. The last thing I wanted was small talk with my father.

"Yeah, I suppose it is," I answered shortly.

He stared straight ahead. "I suppose we'll have to turn on the fireplaces tonight."

"Yeah, sure," I agreed distractedly. With my anxiety to get back to Bella growing, I began, "Listen dad, I have to make-"

But Carlisle cut me off. "Edward, I've got to say, I was very happy to hear from your uncle that things with Tanya are over for real this time."

I smirked and rolled my eyes. "Yes dad. But I told you that already, didn't I?"

He raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "Can you really blame me for not believing you? I mean, it wouldn't be the first time you said you'd ended things with her only to get back together the following week. And the tabloids said-"

"Maybe you should stop believing everything you read and just believe me for once."

He'd picked the wrong time to mention the tabloids. All those nosy assholes were on my shit list at the moment.

"Yes, you're right," he agreed warily. "I probably should've listened to you."

My head jerked back in surprise. I hadn't expected him to actually agree.

"Um, that's…okay," I hedged curiously. "I guess I can see why it would've been a bit hard to believe. She and I did yo-yo back and forth there for a while."

Carlisle nodded. Just as I thought we were done with the father son thing for the season and was getting ready to excuse myself once again, he said, "Listen, good luck with the presentation this week. Emmett tells me you've all worked really hard on this for the past few weeks. I'm sure all that hard work will pay off."

Again, I was momentarily shocked. In the five years since we'd started CCW, my father and I rarely, if ever, discussed anything related to its projects or progress. In his mind, our discussions should've revolved around aortas and clogged arteries and the latest advances in surgical instruments. I was supposed to have been the one to continue the Cullen Legacy, not develop cereal commercials.

After the initial surprise wore off, I recovered myself and answered, "Yeah, it's been a lot of long days and a few long evenings, but we're pretty confident." – I smirked, realizing I'd just used Jenks' token phrase – "The initial idea was Bella's, and it was a great one, so we've pretty much got it in the bag."

Carlisle nodded again, as if he were considering this. Keeping his eyes trained on the dark night ahead, he slowly asked, "And…how's Bella doing? Your mother and sister tell me she's got some problems with her ex-husband at the moment?"

This is where I started to get suspicious. To anyone else, to his friends or colleagues, those two questions would've been just small talk between a father and son. The way he asked them, slowly and calmly, without a hint of anything else in his voice. But I'd dealt with my father's calm, rational questions for years now, and I knew how they worked.

Involuntarily, I swallowed before answering; cursing myself as I did, because as well as I knew my dad's tells, he probably knew mine even better. Staring out into the darkness, I answered,

"Apparently mom and Alice have all the information." I tried to keep the irritation out of my voice; the less ammo I gave him the better. "So you should probably ask them anything you want to know. Not that I think they should be discussing Bella's business so openly," I threw in petulantly.

It was as if I could feel the atmosphere around us changing, morphing into the charged, tense air that usually surrounded conversations between my father and I. Carlisle seemed to hesitate for just a few seconds before asking,

"Edward, who were you on the phone with just now?"

My jaw tightened. "That was a personal call."

"What's going on?"

I drew in a deep breath. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him watching me now, waiting for an answer that wasn't coming.

Carlisle inhaled deeply, letting it out slowly. "I don't know exactly what's going on Edward, but I urge you to stop and think. She's not the kind of girl you're used to."

The irritation I'd been trying to hold back now seeped to the forefront, but still, I struggled against it. I knew showing my father how his words cut me to the quick would just give him the upper hand.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I mumbled without looking at him.

But Carlisle wasn't deterred. He continued in that maddening, calm demeanor of his that had always rattled me.

"Son, like I said before, I'm really glad you finally ended things with Tanya. From the very beginning, your mother and I felt that your association with Tanya was…dangerous. Your mother feared she'd break your heart," – we both smirked – "but I feared she'd destroy your character. She brought out the worst in you. While you were with her, it was like you enjoyed showing the world just how bad you could be."

I closed my eyes, trying to block out the images of what those last few months with Tanya had been like. Sex, parties, drinking. More sex, more parties, more drinking. In the end, I'd felt nothing but a void inside me that all the debauchery in the world couldn't fill.

Carlisle didn't need my verbal confirmation. He saw it all in my face.

"I'm glad you seemed to have tired of that son. I've noticed a change in you, in the past few weeks, and I'm happy to see that you seem to be trying to figure out who you really are."

Again, I didn't answer, but I couldn't help feeling somewhat pleased by his words; feeling…gratified by his apparent approval. Shit, did I _finally_ get something right? How long had it been since my father had been proud of me? A memory of myself as a young, skinny kid popped into my head, holding up the Little League World Series trophy my team and I had just won after I'd brought home the winning run; my dad standing proudly in the bleachers watching me. Afterwards, he'd taken the whole team out for ice-cream, and as he'd handed me my triple chocolate brownie cone, he'd looked me in the eye and patted my shoulder. "I'm really proud of you son," he'd said.

I hadn't heard that line very much as an adult.

And after hearing the next few words out of Carlisle's mouth, I realized I wasn't going to hear them any time in the near future.

"But you don't go from being 'Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy' to 'Edward Cullen, Superhero' overnight. And you certainly shouldn't be experimenting with an innocent woman and her child, who have enough problems of their own. It's irresponsible."

My head shot around to face him, and I couldn't control the shock, the resentment, the fucking _hurt_ in my voice. "What? What are you-? What are you joking me? Experimenting? You've got no idea what you're talking about!"

He stared at me patiently, as if he were waiting for me to get over one of my childhood tantrums. As always, it only served to increase my indignation.

I rounded my whole body to face him, leaning in closer. "You don't know what's going on in my head," I hissed, "so do me a favor and stay out of it! You don't know me. You never have and you never will. You don't know what I feel, or what I think, or why I do the things I do. And you have _no clue whatsoever_ about what's really going on." I was seething by the time I finished.

By contrast, Carlisle was the picture of calm, cool and collected. Why hadn't I inherited _that_ from him?

"On the contrary Edward, I'm pretty sure I've got a clear picture of what's going on. You're tired of your old games. And like I said son, I'm really glad about that. Along comes a beautiful young woman and her little girl. They're all alone in the city and you see this as your chance to do something different, to play the hero instead of the bad guy. She needs a ride? You give her a ride. Her little girl needs help getting to her dance class? You step in and make it happen." He paused and met my eyes. "She needs a lawyer, you pay for the top family law counselor in the country."

I stared at him through wide, shocked eyes. "How…"

Carlisle sighed, the only outward sign he ever gave of being distressed. "Edward, hopefully someday you'll have a family of your own son, and then you'll understand that no matter how old, a child never stops being a child in the eyes of his parents. Every mistake they make is your mistake, just like every right move they make is cause to make you proud. You pick up on the most subtle changes, remarks, comments. Sometimes…you accidentally overhear things, and then all of a sudden, your mind puts two and two together."

I wondered if he could see the infuriation in my face at his gall.

"Unfreakin-believable," I muttered, shaking my head. "Do you know what color boxers I'm wearing too? I hate to disappoint you yet again, but I've gotta tell you dad, you've done a real – pardon my French – shitty job at piecing together this puzzle."

"So you didn't have a hand in getting Bella her lawyer?"

I glared at him but didn't answer, which was confirmation in itself. I was going to have a few choice words for my favorite uncle next time I spoke to him. And he could kiss my ass about going to his charity auction this week.

"And are you going to tell me you're not paying for him?"

I'd had enough at this point. I was a grown fucking man, I didn't have to answer to Carlisle. And I _needed_ to call Bella back. I needed to tell her everything was going to be okay, that I wouldn't let anything happen. Yes, goddamnit, I'd be her hero if she let me.

"You know what dad? I'm not doing this with you. I've got a phone call to make, and frankly, I don't want to be disrespectful, but none of this is any of your business." I started to walk away.

Suddenly, my father's voice was no longer as calm. "Edward, what happens when you tire of playing superhero?"

I wheeled around. "What?" I asked, confused.

"What happens to Bella and Maddie when you grow tired of this role?"

I walked back over to my father quickly. "Did you ever stop to think that maybe, just maybe, this isn't a game to me? That I'm not experimenting, or trying to _play_ hero?" I thought I saw his eyebrows rise slightly in surprise, but it was so hard to read Carlisle's calm face. I swallowed thickly. "Did you ever stop and think that perhaps, this is real to me? That _she's_ real?"

We stared at each other for a long time, neither one of us saying anything or looking away. We were exactly the same height, my father and I; we had the same build, although being older, his shoulders rounded slightly more than mine. I had Esme's eyes and hair color, but I could see that what the papers said was true. Physically, I was a younger version of Carlisle. Unfortunately for him, that's where the similarities ended.

He put one hand on my shoulder, almost apologetic. "Son, for years everything's been a game to you." He paused. "I'm afraid you'd just end up hurting Bella and Madisen."

I sneered and shook my head, moving my shoulder away. His hand dropped back to his side. "Your confidence in me, as always, is heartwarming." This time, when I walked away, I headed towards the driveway. "Say goodbye to mom for me."

"Edward wait," he called out and I could finally, finally hear something in his voice.

I didn't bother waiting to hear what it was. It would just be a variation on what I'd heard for years. Throwing the Audi into reverse, I backed out of the driveway and drove away.

A few miles down the Long Island Expressway, I turned into a rest stop. Sitting there with the car on park, I quickly replayed the conversation with my father.

I snorted. To think for a second there I'd thought we were finally starting to get past our issues. But it had all been a trick. He'd just been trying to bring my guard down so he could once again remind me of what a fuck up I was. That hadn't hurt so much; I was used to hearing that from him. But for him to insinuate that I'd ever purposely hurt Bella and Maddie? That I was playing some kind of game?

Taking a deep breath and pushing the whole incident with my father to the back of my mind, I quickly took out my cell phone and dialed Bella's number

"Edward," she breathed when she picked up the phone, and automatically, all the tension, all the hurt melted away with that one little word from her mouth. I could tell, from just that one word, that she felt better too.

I closed my eyes and smiled.

"You sound better," I said.

"Yeah," she agreed, with a smile in her voice. "I just got off the phone with Jenks. I was so upset before that I didn't listen to what else he had to say. But he seems to be pretty confident" – I rolled my eyes – "that we can still get out of this." She paused. "There are…things my ex-husband would probably prefer to keep out of court, and Jenks thinks just letting him know we plan to present those things to the court might be enough of an incentive to Paul to drop the whole thing. And he reminded me that no court in their right mind would grant Paul immediate custody with his background."

I thought for a moment. "What do you think? Do you think he'll back off?"

She took a quick breath and let it out just as quick. "I'd like to think this is just another one of those things Paul does on a whim, without actually thinking it through, and without a well thought out plan. It would fit his personality."

I swallowed. "I wish there was more I could do Bella, than just sit here and tell you everything's going to be alright."

She chuckled once. "You already have."

I shook my head, feeling so useless. "What did I do?"

"Just…talking to you before. I felt…calmer after I got off the phone with you." She sighed. "Just hearing you say it's going to be alright, it helps."

"How?"

"I don't know." The way she said it, as if she really had no clue. "It just does."

We talked a bit more, about how Maddie was settling in, and then I heard a gruff voice, an older man, call her, and Bella quickly said goodbye.

That night at home, I fell asleep thinking of Bella, of Maddie, of Jenks. Of my father and what it meant to be a father…and a man. That was the night I first had the nightmare.

Tuesday was hell. The following day was the court hearing. Unfortunately, it also happened to be the Cartwright presentation, and while I should've been getting ready for that, my mind was entirely somewhere else. No matter how I tried, I couldn't focus. I couldn't get my mind off of my nightmare, or off of the possibility that the hearing wouldn't go Bella's way the next morning.

She called me that evening, thank God, because I was starting to go bat-shit.

After filling me in on Maddie's afternoon, which involved fishing with her grandpa and Jake, she fell silent, and I knew she was worrying about the hearing the next day.

"It's going to be okay, you'll see," I said, with more conviction than I actually felt.

"Yeah…I know," she agreed, but I could hear the fear in her voice. "Edward, I've been thinking, about what we sort of talked about before I came to Washington." Her voice was low, almost a whisper.

I felt myself stiffen. Had she changed her mind?

"What I said to you, about understanding if you wanted to keep things…the way they are now, I meant it. I hope you know that. You're friendship means a lot to me. I don't know what I would've done these past few days without you to talk to. My dad, Jake, I love them but all they can think of is kicking Paul's ass. They don't see that this goes way beyond physically hurting Paul. This hearing tomorrow affects my daughter's entire life; who she has to call daddy. And Paul's just not…" – she took a deep breath – "he was never up for that job. I know I can't protect her forever Edward, but she's only four. And if I don't protect her, who will?"

And for a split second, I felt an agonizing sharp pain in my heart. Because something told me this was all wrong; Paul should never be the one Maddie calls daddy. I almost said it, but I bit down on my tongue.

"I don't want to ruin our friendship, or Maddie's relationship with you, by turning this into something…different." She stopped, but it sounded like there'd been more she'd wanted to say too.

"I don't want to ruin our friendship either Bella, so I'll leave it completely up to you where this goes when you return. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't want more than just…friendship."

She sighed. "Should I call you tomorrow, after the hearing?"

I snorted and shook my head. "What kind of question is that? If you don't, I'll probably lose my mind."

She was quiet for a few moments, in which I wondered once again what she was thinking. "Good night Edward," she whispered.

I inhaled deeply. "Good night Bella," I murmured, wishing she wasn't almost three thousand miles away.

"And Bella, everything _will_ be okay. Please believe that."

"I'll try to Edward. I really will."

The decision to fly to Washington that night was almost subconscious. One minute I was sitting there on my couch, cell phone in hand, the next I was throwing clothes in a duffel bag, zipping it up and throwing it over my shoulder. In the cab on the way to the airport, I called Emmett to let him know I wouldn't be in the office the following morning.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Emmett yelled into the phone. "Where the fuck are you going?"

"I've got something I've got to take care of."

"You realize tomorrow's the fucking Cartwright meeting, don't you?"

I winced, pounding a fist into the worn seat next to me. I'd completely forgotten about the Cartwrights.

"I'm sorry Em. Apologize to the Cartwrights for me, and…"

"Apologize to the Cartwrights?" Emmett yelled. "Apologize to the Cartwrights? Have you forgotten that Bella's gone too? How the hell are we supposed to explain to the Cartwrights that not only is the person responsible for the entire idea missing, but so is one of our heads?"

"Look, I-"

"No, you look. Bella I can understand. She's got some asshole ex giving her shit, but where the hell are you going?"

"It's personal."

"I don't want to hear that 'it's personal' shit!" Emmett rarely lost his temper; he was more like our father that way. But when he did… "You pulled that 'personal' crap last summer when you disappeared for three weeks, and I put up with it then Edward, because you looked like shit and I knew you needed to get away. But enough of this! You've been spaced out for days, and tomorrow we've got one of the biggest fucking presentations of this agency's short career. You fucking _need_ to be here!"

I knew no matter what I said, Emmett was going to be pissed off. "Emmett, I've got something important-"

"Something important? Something important?" – I pulled the phone away from my ear when he began to repeat himself. "What the hell could you possibly have going on in your life that's more important than this meeting tomorrow? Huh? Some party in London you're missing? Some skank in Miami or LA offered you good head?"

"Here, give me that!" I heard Rosalie say before snatching the phone away from her husband.

"Edward," – I rolled my eyes - "I'm only going to say one thing. Think. About. What. You're. Doing." She let out a frustrated sigh. "There _will_ be consequences to your actions. Make sure you're willing to pay them first."

Were we still talking about my missing the Cartwright meeting?

"I have thought about the consequences, and yes, I'm willing to pay them."

She was quiet, and in the background, Emmett was still yelling. Abruptly, Rosalie snorted, "You're such an idiot," and then hung up.

I shook my head and put my phone away.

A few miles from the airport, my cell phone buzzed. I looked at the caller ID. Alice. Ignoring the phone call, I put my phone away again.

My cell buzzed again. Jasper. I ignored it. Emmett had apparently put out an APB on me.

Another buzz. Emmett again. Ignore.

Another buzz. Alice.

I rolled my eyes when the phone buzzed again and I saw they'd involved our poor mother in it.

Climbing out of the cab at JFK, my phone buzzed again. I pulled out my phone and saw my father's name on the Caller ID.

Fuck.

Shaking my head, I stuck my phone back in my pocket, and got on line to buy my ticket. When the phone buzzed again, I considered ignoring it completely, but what if it was Bella? Reluctantly, I pulled out my phone again only to find that it was Carlisle. Again.

Again and again and again, the phone vibrated in my pocket. After the umpteenth time, I groaned in frustration and looked up to find the lady in front of me staring, wide-eyed. For a second, I thought I may have startled her but then out of the corner of my eye, I saw that the girl who'd been standing behind me was now next to me, openly ogling me with the same wide eyes the women in front of me was.

Slowly, I moved my head from side to side and realized that there were a handful of people now, both on the ticket line and off, gaping openly at me.

Damn it. I'd been made. In my hurry to get to the airport, I'd completely forgotten about my disguise.

"Edward Cullen," I heard whispered, as more and more people recognized me. I lowered my head. The not-so-hushed-whispers around me grew. I was stuck with nothing to do but try and ignore the stares, the loud whispers, the angry vibrating in my pocket, the stares, the loud whispers, the angry vibrating in my pocket, the stares, the loud whispers, the angry vibrating in my pocket…

I groaned again, louder this time, not caring that I had an audience, and pulled out my cell phone. I was sure that if nothing else, whatever my father had to say would at least distract me.

"Yeah dad," I mumbled into the phone, keeping my head down and pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Edward, what are you doing?" I was surprised by how ruffled his feathers sounded.

"Judging from how you've been blowing up my phone, I'd say you have a pretty good idea."

He exhaled, and I could practically hear his eyes rolling. "Where are you?"

"Aren't you always two steps ahead of me? Haven't you guessed-"

"All I know is that I received a frantic phone call from your brother and his wife, saying you've disappeared again and you're planning on missing that meeting tomorrow. I thought that was important to you?"

I watched the uniformed airline teller signal for the next person in line to move up. Everyone else move up quickly, anxious to buy their tickets to wherever they were headed.

"There are more important things than that meeting."

Silence. "Does she even know you're going over there?" There was no point in keeping up pretenses anymore. Carlisle knew exactly where I was headed. Nevertheless, I didn't answer.

What _would _Bella say when I showed up at her father's doorstep? Would she be happy to see me there? Or would she think I'd gone against her wishes? Would Jacob be there? Would my presence make things uncomfortable; awkward? I moved up again as the teller called another person up to the front. There were less than a handful of people left in front of me.

"Have you thought this through Edward? I mean, really thought this through?"

"I…I need to be there for them."

My father sighed. "Edward, son, listen to me. You were right the other night. I don't know exactly what's going on. But I know enough to know that, even though I know you only want to be there for them, your presence in that courtroom can only hurt Bella right now, not help."

"How could it possibly hurt her?" But even as I asked the question, the answer glared at me through the eyes of every single person staring at me right now.

"Edward, once you buy your ticket, how long do you really think it'll take the newspapers and tabloids to put two and two together? Once you rent a car over there, how long do you think it'll take them to figure out where you're headed, and why? And once you show up in the courtroom" – he paused – "do you really think that sort of publicity will help Bella? You're right Edward, I don't know exactly what's going on. But I know enough to know that the media circus that would follow you into that courtroom would be disastrous."

I closed my eyes, exhaling angrily through my nose.

"Next," the teller called. I looked up to see that it was my turn. I hesitated. "Next!" she called out again, huffing impatiently.

"Dad, I just _need_ to be there for her…for _both_ of them."

"I know that Edward. I know. And from what I've seen, you _have_ been there for her, and you can keep being there by not making things harder for her. And by showing her that you can be responsible, as well as helpful."

In the back of my mind, I could hear the words he'd repeated to me so many times over the years.

_Be the man I know you can be_.

Is this what he meant? Did it really have nothing to do with medical school, or following in his footsteps, or even falling in love with the right person? Was it just about knowing things like when to go…and when to stay? Putting someone else's needs before my own?

"Ex-kee-use me Mr. Cullen? While ah am tuhruly enjoyin' watchin' you from over here, the line behind you is growin', and mah supervisor's gonna have mah head if I don't keep it movin'!"

I took a few deep breaths. The teller arched an eyebrow. With a final long pull of air, I got off the line and walked away.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews are almost as good as getting a sneak peak of Edward in the shower. Leave one.**

**One more chapter from Edward next, and it should be ready in a few days. Then we get to Bella.**


	12. Chapter 11 Baby You'll Be Famous

**I want to thank all of you who reviewed the last chapter. I really enjoyed reading your thoughts. Most of us seem to agree that while listening to Carlisle may be hard for Edward, it's for his own good. They've had a difficult relationship for the past few years, but hopefully that'll improve once Edward straightens his life out.**

**This next chapter is probably one of my favorites so far. Read and let me know what you think.**

**Muchas gracias to my beta Danna0724, for turning this monster of a chappy around so quickly. To quote you, 'love ya hard!'**

**All characters (except for my Maddie) belong to S. Meyer, I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 11 - Baby You'll Be Famous**

**Song Rec. – Paparazzi by Lady Gaga**

**EPOV**

The next day at the office, Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper were too preoccupied with the Cartwright meeting to give me any shit about what had almost gone down the night before. Good thing. I couldn't put up with their crap this morning. Bella's hearing in Washington was just a few hours away.

The Cartwrights arrived at ten, and we met them in the large conference room. The room was surrounded on two sides with floor to ceiling windows, giving an impressive view of Columbus Circle below, as well as a large stretch of Central Park in all its glory. I tried to hide my scowls while I watched them ooh and aah at the view. I couldn't stand them; two fucking dirty old men in expensive suits. Ever since they'd practically undressed Bella with their eyes at our last couple of meetings, it was all I could do to keep from spitting in their faces every time I saw them. So I greeted them as politely as possible, and then kept a safe distance. The situation wasn't helped any by the anxious knot in my stomach as I wondered what was going on in Washington.

Rosalie guided everyone through the presentation, with James backing her up, and occasionally, Lauren. I had to hand it to Rose, she gave full credit to Bella where it was due, which really, was for most of it. Lauren on the other hand, was obviously anything but happy to be there. She played her part so poorly that I was sure – from the huge scowl on Rosalie's face - she would be the recipient of some serious Rosalie ass-kicking before the day was over.

The meeting went on for a couple of hours. When the grandfather clock at the end of the room chimed twelve, I inhaled deeply, drawing in a shaky breath. It was nine a.m. in Washington; the start of the hearing.

"That was just wonderful! Simply wonderful!" John Cartwright cried out a few seconds after Rosalie closed the presentation. He clapped his hands together appreciatively, glancing at his brother, who looked as pleased as he. "Ms. Swan's idea is simply marvelous, and you and your team have worked together perfectly to turn it into a wonderful campaign for our company. How soon can we get it out there?"

That's where I came in. "We can have it all in production in a couple of weeks. Everything is ready to go; we're just awaiting your approval."

John Cartwright went on and on for a few minutes, how we definitely had their approval, how impressed he'd been by the presentation, how he was so extremely sorry that the lovely Ms. Swan wasn't able to join us today, how impressed he'd been by her, again how lovely she was, what a lovely addition she was to our team, how he'd make sure he thanked her personally next time he was at our offices. _'Yeah, over my dead body fucker,'_ I thought, glaring at him. His expression suddenly changed and a flash of fear crossed his face. For a second, I thought I'd said it aloud. He quickly dropped the subject of Ms. Swan and all her loveliness. _Yeah, I thought so_. Turning towards Emmett, I found him giving me one of his 'Dude, what the fuck?' looks. I shrugged and turned away.

12:15 p.m. – While Rosalie made plans with the Cartwrights and the rest of the team for all of us to go out to lunch and celebrate, my mind wandered back to Washington. What was happening? Had they started the hearing? Was that asshole ex-husband of Bella's giving her trouble at this moment? My hands tightened around the edges of the mahogany conference table. For the thousandth time, I wondered if I'd done the right thing by not going to Washington.

12:20 p.m. – "Hello? Earth to Edward." Emmett called, standing above me with a puzzled look on his face. "Everyone's by the elevators already. Let's go!" he smiled curiously; all his anger from last night evaporated in light of a successful campaign.

"Go where?"

"Are you on something Edward? Is that what's going on here? We're all going out to celebrate. Let's go!" he repeated, clapping my shoulder twice. I followed him out reluctantly.

At exactly 12:38 p.m., just as our group was being seated by the hostess at the steakhouse, my phone vibrated. Hoping though not really expecting it to be a call from Washington, not so soon, I pulled out my phone. My heart jumped when I saw the number, and then a stab of fear hit me. What did such a quick response mean? I excused myself quickly and walked out of the restaurant.

"Bella?" I asked, holding my breath.

"Edward, Paul never showed up!" It took me a few seconds to register the words, and when I finally did, the corners of my mouth turned up in a huge grin.

"That's good right?" I asked carefully.

She laughed. "Yes, that's good."

"Yes!" I yelled, doing a fist pump in the air. A few heads turned and looked my way, but for the first time in days, I didn't care.

Bella laughed, and God, was it the most beautiful sound I'd heard in a while. "Jay and I waited, and I was scared Edward, because I kept thinking he was going to pull some last minute stunt. But then someone handed the judge a letter, and she shook her head and told us that Paul and his lawyer had decided to withdraw their petition!" The relief in her voice was palpable. My smile widened.

"So what happens now?"

"Well," she said, "Now Jay wants to speak to the court about filing the correct petition to terminate Paul's paternity rights. Since Paul did sign the last document, and since he didn't show up for today's hearing, Jay wants to see if he can convince the court that getting this document filed would be in the best interest for Maddie."

Maddie. Maddie would be coming back. Bella would be coming back. I felt a sudden ache to hold them both near me.

"How soon do you think you can get it taken care of?"

"Jay says he's pretty confident we can have it all wrapped up by the end of the week."

Pretty confident. By the end of the week.

"So you'll be home, I mean, back in New York, this weekend?" I smiled.

"Yeah, I think so," she agreed softly.

"Good," I breathed.

"Very good," she chuckled. "As much as I love being with my dad and Jake, I'm…anxious to get back."

A sudden warmth radiated throughout my whole body. There were so many things I wanted to say to her. So many thoughts and feelings I wanted to confess that I hadn't let myself think of before. The thoughts, the words were dripping from my tongue, but I didn't want to keep telling her these things over the phone.

"So what are you doing now?" I asked her instead.

"Jay's taking Jake and me out for breakfast, to celebrate."

"Oh. Jake's with you?" I couldn't help the sharp pang of jealousy.

"Mm hmm. Jay says he wants to take us to this place his friend told him about in Seattle, where they apparently make these amazing lobster and truffle omelets? Sounds pretty pricey to me, but he says not to worry. It's generous of him, I guess, but I just want to eat quickly so I can get back home to Maddie."

Oh yeah, pretty fucking generous of him, I snorted to myself, especially since I'd be the one picking up the tab. But that wasn't what was bothering me.

"Jake went to court with you then?"

"Of course," she answered. An awkward silence followed.

"So what happened with the Cartwrights?" she asked abruptly.

The Cartwrights. I'd completely forgotten about them and the rest of our party inside the restaurant.

"Actually, the meeting was a success. We're out celebrating too."

"That's great!"

"Yeah…" I trailed off. "I've got to get back inside. So…call me later? Let me know how your lobster omelet was, and how everything else went in court?"

"Okay, sure," she answered, her tone more subdued than it'd been when she'd first called.

After we hung up, I made my way back into the restaurant, feeling better than I had when I'd walked in. But I felt uneasy too. Because although I didn't know him, I was pretty sure that even if Bella just considered Jake a good friend, Jake didn't see it that way.

Bella called me back that night, while I was out for my jog around the park.

"How was your omelet this morning?"

"Blah!" she moaned, making me laugh. "Thank God Jake's an unending funnel. I would've hated for such an expensive dish to go to waist."

"So he's a big guy, is he?" I asked, looking down at myself smugly, proud of the way I'd always made it a point to keep myself in shape.

"He's huge!" she agreed. "If I didn't know him better, I'd swear he used some sort of anabolic steroids or something to pump up those biceps."

My smile faded. "Oh. So...any plans for the rest of your stay in Washington, now that you've got that hearing out of the way?"

"Not really. I haven't really been able to enjoy my time with my dad, so I think I'll just take it easy with him and Maddie. How about you? Anything fun going on for Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy?"

"Bellaaaa," I groaned, and she laughed, making me laugh.

"I'm just kidding. Besides, I thought you didn't mind all the nicknames and attention?"

"I never _used_ to mind. I find myself looking at things differently lately. Wanting things to be different."

"Oh really? Like what?" I could hear the smile in her voice.

"Like…" I looked across the large pond and saw the sun disappearing behind the trees. "Like watching the sun set on a cool afternoon after a long jog, and suddenly wishing there was someone here watching it with me."

"Mmm," she murmured. "That sounds nice. What else?"

I smiled and took a seat on a bench. "Like…like buying one of those huge brownies in Starbucks? You know the ones with the chocolate and nut pieces? And for the first time actually _wanting_ to share it with someone who loves chocolate _almost_ as much as I do."

She laughed. "_Almost_ as much? We'll see about that."

I chuckled, and before I knew it, I was saying, "Like…like remembering the feel of a pair of warm, soft lips on mine, moving softly. And wanting to taste them again so badly it hurts."

She was silent, but I could hear her uneven breathing on the other line. I chuckled again.

"Actually," I began, reminding myself I didn't want to do this with her over the phone, "my uncle is having this charity auction thing tomorrow. I wasn't going to go but…I don't know. I think Esme kind of wants me to make an appearance…"

"Tomorrow huh?" she asked, as if she had something else on her mind. Then she quickly added, "I mean, that sounds like fun. And if Esme wants you there, you should definitely go."

I remembered how I'd originally wished she could've come with me, before I'd known she was going to be out of town.

"Maybe…maybe next time you could come with me. I mean, you know, maybe we can go somewhere, when you get back."

"Maybe." She hesitated. "What about Maddie?"

"Maddie? Maddie would come too, of course."

She didn't answer right away, but then spoke quickly. "Edward, have you thought about what I said, before I left? I'm not sure, I mean, things were so crazy for the past few days and I couldn't think straight, and now," -she slowed down, speaking each world distinctly – "I don't know what to make of this. What you want or expect this to be." I heard her swallow. "I'm. Not. Like. Tanya. Or even Lauren for that matter. I've got my daughter to think of, and I don't do casual hook-ups- Oh God, now I've made myself sound like a hawk and a prude in the space of two sentences. What I mean is-"

"Bella, I'm not looking for a casual hook up," I confirmed. "I meant it when I said I'm seeing things differently. I want different things. I want…"

What could I tell her that wouldn't make me sound like a friggin' weirdo right now? Could I tell her that watching her come and go from work every day were the highlights of my day? Could I tell her that the short amount of time we spent together going to Maddie's dance class were the highlight of my _week_? Could I tell her I daydreamed of what it would be like to spend a cool evening snuggling up with her? That while I couldn't deny dreaming of having her in my bed, it wasn't the thought of having sex with her that kept me up at night – well, it was – but it was more than that too. It was the thought of holding her warm body in my arms afterwards, having her fall asleep with her head on my chest and her arms draped around me, hearing her quiet, steady breathing while I buried my head in her hair – _that's_ what warmed me.

But there was more. How could I make her understand that in the short amount of time I'd known her, I yearned for the feel of Maddie's small hand in mine, that my heart jumped when she looked at me with those big, innocent brown eyes, that when I watched her do her little turns in Alice's class I wanted to clap and cheer as loud as the next parent? How could I explain these things to her, when I didn't understand them myself?

In the end, all I could say was, "I want a chance to show you that I can be more."

"Hmm," she murmured thoughtfully. For a while, she said nothing else. "Edward, just do me one favor. Don't show me someone you're not."

"Is that what you think I'm doing?"

"I don't think so, but…" She drew in a deep breath. "Let's make an agreement Edward. I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

"Come again?" I choked.

She laughed softly. "What I mean is, I'll tell you all about the real Bella Swan, as long as you promise to tell me about the real Edward Cullen. Not the one I read about in the papers, the one behind all that. Deal?"

"Okay," I agreed reluctantly. "I warn you though, it's not pretty."

"Ditto," she chuckled.

A voice suddenly called her name. A loud voice. And this time, the voice didn't sound gruff or older. It was a younger man's voice, and it sounded impatient and confused.

"Coming!" she called out. "I've gotta go Edward. But I'll…"

"Let me know when you have your flight information, so I can pick you and Maddie up."

"You don't have to do that, I can take a cab."

"Bella," I huffed, sounding just as impatient as the person who'd just called for her. "I'm picking you up."

"I'll call you soon," she said. I didn't miss how she hadn't actually agreed.

After we hung up, the uneasiness I'd felt earlier gnawed at me even more. It hadn't been her father calling her that time, I was sure of it. And the way he'd said her name…with a possessiveness that only another man feeling the same way would pick up on.

Yeah, Jake was going to be a fucking problem.

And as if that wasn't enough to screw with my mind, Bella's request that I bare myself to her was. Could I do it? It wasn't that I wanted to hide anything from her, it was just that while I knew there wasn't anything she could tell me about herself that would scare me away, I wasn't sure if it would work the other way around. Would the asshole I'd been in the past make her run for the hills without looking back?

I called Uncle Aro the next morning, to let him know I'd be going to his auction after all.

I also wanted to let him know I knew exactly what a gossiping, backstabbing woman he'd turned out to be.

"So you and my parents have been having a grand ole time trying to figure me out lately?" I accused, before we hung up.

He chuckled shamelessly. "Aw come on Godson. Don't go all biblical on me. I didn't betray you or anything. Whatever they've pieced together they've done on their own. You're not as covert as you seem to think yourself."

"Yeah, whatever," I said begrudgingly.

"So…are you bringing P L Double G with you tonight then?"

"What the hell is a P L Double G?" I asked.

"Pretty Little Graphic Girl," he answered, as if that should've been plainly obvious.

"I'm not bringing anyone with me tonight. And her name's not P L whatever."

"Oh really? What is it then?"

"Good-bye uncle Aro. See you tonight."

He chuckled. "See you tonight Edward. Wear something spiffy. Vicki's bringing a bunch of her friends, and if P L Double G won't be in attendance, then it's a whole new ballgame." I smirked and hung up.

As soon as I made the turn onto Park Avenue that night, the first thing I noticed were the dozens of paparazzi standing behind the red ropes on either side of the Waldorf-Astoria. I sucked my teeth and groaned, dreading having to face them with their flashing cameras and their senseless questions.

Stepping out of the Aston-Martin and handing the keys over to valet, I kept my eyes trained straight ahead while the flashes went off around me.

"Edward, who are you wearing?"

"Edward, are you meeting up with anyone here tonight?"

"Edward, is it true you're the father of Britney's baby?"

I rolled my eyes and kept walking, slightly gratified to hear the pap's confused murmurs as they wondered why the hell I wasn't answering any of their questions, or giving them a crooked grin to plaster all over their tabs the next morning.

The Grand Ballroom inside the hotel was done up perfectly, as usual. My mother's signature touch could be seen from the way the pink and white roses sparkled on every table, to the pink ribbons tied around each chair. This was, after all, one of Esme's favored causes.

I made my way through the large room, looking around and recognizing most of the faces. The mayor, the governor, the state senator, Derek was here again this year, and so was- oh shit, Britney. I'd have to make sure I stayed far away from her, before those stupid rumors ran rampant. Just as I was about to turn away, she turned and looked right at me, winking and giving me an amused smile before quickly turning away.

As usual, there were only a handful of reporters actually allowed into the auction. These were mainly from what were considered 'more reputable' publications, such as the New York Times and such, but everyone in here knew how easily stories and pictures got leaked anyway. Leaked, altered, fabricated, anything to ensure high sales of their publications. It was a dirty business, one which I'd never given a second thought to until lately…

I felt a soft hand on my shoulder. "Edward honey, you made it." I turned to face my mother, who was smiling radiantly. "Aro said you were coming, but I wasn't sure. Everyone else is here already." She frowned. "Except Alice, I'm not sure where she is. Jasper said she had to go help a friend with something, but- Oh, there's the mayor's wife. Honey I'll catch up with you later," she said quickly, starting to walk away. She frowned again, deeper this time, before turning back to me. "Edward," she paused, "Why don't you go find the rest of our family? Don't walk around here alone okay?"

The way she said it, as if she were afraid I'd get into some sort of trouble by myself, made me chuckle. "Yes mom. I'll go look for my dad and my big brother."

She opened her mouth as if she wanted to say more, but then gave me a nervous smile and walked away.

Just as I'd promised my mom, I searched the crowded ballroom for Emmett, for Jasper, but I couldn't spot them. Giving up for the time being, I headed towards the tables where the items up for auction were located, to see this year's pickings. In the past, I'd gathered a few nice items for myself from these auctions. The Aston-Martin, a ski trip to Vale. Sure, they were luxury items, but I soothed away the guilt by reminding myself that the proceeds went to charity, so it was a win-win situation all around, right?

Scanning the table, I was having a hard time picking out something to bid on. More cars, more trips, more things I didn't particularly need. Besides, I'd just bought a new Volvo and I'd finally be picking it up tomorrow. Just in time for this weekend. Just in time to pick up Bella and Maddie…

A shiny, glittering item suddenly caught my eye. It was a string of pear-shaped diamonds leading to an oval blue sapphire nestled in between more diamonds, all in an elegant strand of platinum. It sparkled brilliantly in the middle of the large table, and I could've sworn a heavenly light was shining down on it as it called my name.

_Edward, bid on me. You know you want to. You know for who. Go ahead. Don't be shy_.

The pretty little necklace was paired with a set of sapphire and diamond stud earrings.

My mouth turned up in a grin, picturing the surprise on Bella's face when I gave this to her, and picturing the way she'd turn around and lift her long hair up, giving me access to her creamy neck…imagining myself clasping it carefully, and then lowering my lips to the back of her neck as she held her hair up for me while I pulled her in closer, feeling the warmth of her body envelop me…

The pen trembled in my left hand as I wrote down my bid for the necklace. She wouldn't take a present like this right away; I knew that much about her. But maybe in a few months…maybe for Christmas…

"Is that for me dahling?" a shrill voice whined in my ear. I clenched my jaw and closed my eyes, wondering what I'd done to deserve this now. I'd hoped she wouldn't show up tonight, but I guess that would've been too much to ask for.

"No, it's not for you Tanya," I answered curtly, without looking at her.

"Oh, too bad. Sapphires have always been one of my favorite. Although I do think I look better in diamonds."

I finished writing down my bid information and straightened up. Tanya stood in front of me, in a black dress so short it would make the corner hookers blush. Had I actually once found her sexy? I fought back a shudder of disgust.

"What do you think?" she asked, splaying one hand in front of her chest, where a huge diamond sparkled brightly from between her surgically enhanced cleavage.

"I think it's obscene," I replied, my tone making it obvious I was referring to more than just the large jewel strategically hanging between her barely covered tits.

She laughed and moved in closer. "Funny…you never thought that before. As a matter of fact, if I recall correctly, you were once rather fond…of my assets."

"Yeah, well, as I keep trying to tell you, that was then and this is now. Now if you'll excuse me." I made to move past her, but she grabbed my arm.

I closed my eyes and counted backwards from five. "Tanya, let go."

She giggled and draped herself over me, leaning into my ear. "Oh come on Eddie," she breathed, "let's stop playing these games and take me home already. I haven't had you in so long…"

I jerked my arm away from her, scowling into her face. "You know, you're making it very hard for me to be a gentleman," I hissed, turning my back to her and walking away before I lost control and cursed her out in front of the whole god-damned ballroom.

"Then stop trying so hard," she called out after me. I ignored her and kept walking.

When I reached the bar, I ordered a double shot of tequila to calm me. That fucking wench had a way with unnerving me. I raised the shot to my lips and found Jasper on the stool next to me.

"Can't shake her can you?" he asked with a bemused smile.

I threw back the shot and slammed it down on the bar, signaling the bartender for another.

"She's like a fucking leach that refuses to get cut off." I threw back the next shot.

Jasper laughed, turning in his stool. I followed his gaze to Tanya, who stood on the other side of the room with a couple of guys who were openly admiring her 'diamond' and its surrounding décor.

Jasper tilted his head to the side, studying her. "Hmm. I'd say more of a…piranha. Armed and dangerous."

We both watched as the poor dumb fucks she'd lured into her trap looked on at her helplessly, already beyond saving. Disgusted, I wondered if I'd ever looked like one of those assholes.

"And ready to eat her victims alive," I added.

I shook my head and shuddered, making Jasper laugh again. "I hate to say we warned you," he chuckled, "but-"

"Yeah, yeah," I cut him off. "Can we change the subject please? Where's your wife?" I hadn't seen Alice yet. I knew she tried to make these events every year, and I wanted to get her opinion on the sapphire set I'd bid on. I knew if anyone in my family could appreciate it, it'd be her. Shiny, glittery things were right up her alley.

Jasper took a swallow from his drink. "She said she'd meet me here later if she could. Had to go help a friend with somethin' or other. Emmett and Rosalie are around here somewhere though, with your uncle. And I just saw your dad talkin' to the mayor." He hopped off the stool. "Wanna go look for them?" He chuckled, glancing over to Tanya, "Or you wanna wait here for the Piranha from the Amazonian Deep to come lookin' for you again?"

"No! I'm coming. I'm coming," I said, hopping off the stool quickly. "Give me one for the road," I called out to the bartender.

We found Emmett and Rosalie placing a bid on a baseball signed by Jeter and the rest of the current Yankee line-up. Emmett won that bid for Rosalie every year. The collection was her pride and joy.

Once we'd all placed bids, we took our seats at our table, where Uncle Aro and Vicki joined us.

"Hey cuz," Vicki said, taking a seat next to me. "Long time no see."

"Hey Vic." I stood up to greet her and pull out her seat. The room swayed a little, but it wasn't too bad. It'd been a while since I'd pushed back a couple of shots. Vicki was wearing a dress almost as short and revealing as Tanya's. They both resembled each other a lot actually; both tall and slim with a big head of hair. But while Tanya's was more of a strawberry-blonde, Vicki's hair was a shock of red curls. It was easy to see though, who the influencer in the friendship was.

"Where've you been hiding yourself?" Vicki asked. "Tanya says you seem to think you're too good to be seen with us lately." I could tell by the way her mouth curled up in a wry smile that Tanya had been saying more than that.

I tried to keep a blank face as I responded. "Vic, if I were you, I'd stop putting so much stock in what Piranya Tanya says and start thinking for myself." I laughed at my own joke. Not a good sign.

Vicki giggled, sounding a little too much like Tanya for my liking. I repressed a gag, not sure if it came from the liquor or from watching my cousin turning into Tanya.

"Hey she's right! You are being pretentious!" Vicki giggled again.

I was about to say something ungentlemanly when my uncle called out from across the table. "Vicki, leave your cousin alone. He's just upset because P L Double G isn't here. Don't worry nephew, there's always a next time." He winked at me conspiratorially.

I glared at my uncle, willing him with my gaze to shut the hell up. Unfortunately, it was obvious by the flush of his cheeks that he'd already had more than a couple of drinks, and instead, he just laughed at my expression.

"What the hell is P.L. double whatever?" Vicki asked, furrowing her brows. I looked around at the different faces watching me around the table, obviously asking themselves the same question.

"I have no idea what your father's talking about," I answered evenly, but I couldn't suppress the slight pull at one corner of my mouth. Damn Cuervo.

Vicki narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Double G? What is that, a bra size?" Her eyes suddenly widened. "Oh. Wait, is that that girl Jay-Z and Beyonce just walked in with, the one they just signed to their label?"

"Vicki honey, pay attention," Aro said to his daughter. "I said P L Double G isn't here. Therefore it can't be the girl that just walked in, can it?"

Vicki glared at her father accusingly. She was about to tell him something before another thought occurred to her. She turned back to face me with raised eyebrows.

"But then, P.L. Double C-"

"Double G," both me and my uncle said at the same time,

"Double Whatever," she repeated through clenched teeth, "_is_ a girl." I didn't answer, but it didn't matter. It hadn't been a question, and whatever she saw in my face confirmed it for her anyway. And I could tell by the pleased look on her face that she had enough information to go back to Tanya with successfully. I shrugged, not really caring anyway. _Go little bee, go back to the queen bee._

Thankfully, the results of the bids started, and the conversation was forced to end. I was starting to feel sick, and the Kamikaze in front of me probably wasn't helping, but what the hell. Unfortunately I had to sit through a bunch of other shitty bids and wins being announced before they'd get to the sapphire set.

When the winning bidder of the signed baseball was announced, Emmett almost had a stroke.

"What the hell?" he yelled out, standing up and throwing his napkin on the table. "What do you mean the winner is Mark Stevens? Me and my Rosie _always_ win that auction! We've been robbed! I demand a recount!" he ordered, pumping a fisted hand in front of him.

Esme, her face red as a tomato, walked calmly over to her firstborn son and put her hand on his flexed bicep to lower it slowly. "Emmett honey, it's not a vote. There are no recounts. Mr. Stevens must've just bid higher than you."

"But that's not possible mom," Emmett whined while our mother lowered him back to his seat. "Me and Rosie always win. Don't we Rosie?" he asked, turning towards his wife, who sat stiffly next to him with her elbows on the table and her hands covering her face. She didn't answer him.

I looked down at my plate and chuckled. Knowing Emmett, he'd find a way for that baseball to be in his possession by the end of the night. Nobody was taking that away from his Rosie.

The results on the bidding for the sapphire jewelry set finally began.

"The winner of the auction for the Harry Winston Sapphire and Diamond drop necklace and matching earrings is…Mr. Edward Cullen, with a bid of-" – the announcer's eyes grew wide as he read the number off his little paper.

The room went silent and everyone's eyes turned to me when the bid was announced. My family watched me with shocked expressions and more than a couple of hanging jaws.

I looked at my mother - who was watching me in disbelief - and shrugged. "It's for charity, isn't it?"

Suddenly my uncle's loud, gruff laughter broke the silence. Holding his drink up to me, he exclaimed, "P.L. Double-G, you've got yourself a winner here!" We both laughed and took another gulp from our drinks.

I wasn't waiting for the auction to end. Once I'd completed the transaction to have the jewelry set delivered, I said my goodbye's to my family and to the varied people in attendance I needed to be pleasant to, for business' sake, and headed out of the ballroom.

I'd had a few more drinks tonight than I'd expected to, what with the shots I'd needed after my encounter with Piranya Tanya - I chuckled again at the name - then a few more drinks I'd needed to ignore the curious stares from everyone after the bid for the jewelry had been announced. So instead of driving home, I spoke to the front desk at the hotel and instructed them to have my car delivered to me early the next day. Then I went outside to hail a cab.

While I waited, I pulled out my cell from my coat pocket. It was almost twelve midnight here in New York, which meant it was a little before nine in Washington. I scrolled through my contacts and let the phone dial Bella's cell number. Thank God I had her on speed dial; I wasn't sure if I would've been able to focus enough to dial each number one by one.

For the past few days, I'd been letting Bella determine when we spoke, letting her be the one to initiate the phone calls. But I suddenly needed to hear her voice. And emboldened by more than a few drinks, I wanted to tell her exactly how much I'd been thinking about her, how much I needed her back in New York so that we could get this thing, whatever it was, between us going. I wanted to tell her the story of my life from beginning to end.

But Bella's cell phone went straight to voice mail. Disappointed and a little pissed off, I hung up without leaving a message. I'd been ready to bare my soul, like she'd asked me to, and now she couldn't even be bothered to answer her phone?

I tightened my coat around myself to ward off the abrupt chill in the air. Where was she? Why hadn't she answered her phone? Had she gone out, to celebrate yet again with Jake? I closed my eyes tightly, trying to dispel the images now swimming in my head and mixing with the higher than normal levels of alcohol I'd consumed tonight. Instead, all I saw was Bella off in some quiet little corner of the Washington woods with a tall, dark, overly muscular guy, pawing at each with pure abandon, just like two wild little grizzlies.

I tried calling her again, but again, it went straight to voice mail.

"Ugh!" I groaned, scowling, my eyes still closed and fighting off the nausea – I wasn't sure what was causing it more, the images in my head or the countless shots.

Where the hell was she, and why wasn't she answering her phone?

I thought of the way she'd so nonchalantly mentioned that Jake had gone to court with her, that Jay Jenks was taking her and Jake to celebrate. That Jake protected her. That Jake had been there for her when she'd needed him. And then the way he'd called her. Like he owned her. Like there was more there than just friendship…

I tried to clear my mind while I waited for a cab to stop - Only in fucking New York would you have trouble hailing a cab at twelve midnight. I knew I wasn't thinking logically. I'd had too much to drink. I wasn't thinking straight. These weren't really my thoughts. But no matter how much I tried to suppress them, there they were.

Bella and Jacob. Jacob and Bella. Bella and Jacob. Jacob and Bella.

Where the hell was _she?_

A cab finally came to a stop a few yards away, and I walked towards it quickly, anxious to get home and to bed and to stop these stupid thoughts from swimming around in my head.

And then, as if in some hazy dream, a long pair of legs in red stilettos danced around, opened the cab door in front of me and sat down, crossing those long, naked legs slowly and giving me a clear view of what lay between them. The field was clear and the landing strip ready.

I stood there, staring at her in disbelief, and a little too drunk to react with any sort of urgency one way or the other.

Tanya smiled at me seductively, a cigarette in one hand and the other one caressing her upper thigh. She reached out suddenly with her free hand and took mine, trying to pull me into the cab with her. I stumbled and almost fell on top of her, but righted myself as quickly as my drunk ass would allow.

"Enough with this bullshit Edward. Take me home and fuck my brains out. You know you want to, so just stop fighting it." Blunt. To the point.

Anger flared out from every crevice in my body, heating me up where I'd been cold just a few seconds before. Because what the fuck? _How many ways did I have to fight this woman off?_ And _why_ again was I fighting her off? She was sitting there, in her barely there dress and six inch heels, offering herself to me in _every_ way possible, begging me to _fuck her_ for shit's sakes, and pouty lips and all these images swimming around in my head, me slamming into her hard, and Bella and the tall muscular guy in the dark woods, and Tanya's loud moans asking me for more, and my pants suddenly felt tight and uncomfortable, and God, I hadn't fucked anyone in so long, and my brain hurt from thinking so much, and where _was_ Bella? Why wasn't she answering her phone? And then there was a memory of warm arms around my neck, needing _me;_ not for sex, but for support, and soft lips pulling on mine, a sweet tongue, barely there but enough, enough to make me want more, so much more. And then suddenly Maddie, sleeping quietly in her bed in her grandfather's house, with Angie in her arms, and...and what the hell was I doing? _What was I doing? _

I leaned into Tanya, my face just inches from hers. A wicked smile played on her lips and she took a drag from her cigarette, blowing it out next to my ear.

"You want me to fuck your brains out Tanya? Is that what you want?" I hissed.

Her smile widened; a triumphant gleam in her eyes. "Yesss," she hissed, leaning in closer.

I gave her a long, hard look while she licked her lips, readying herself for me. Who had I been before? _What _had I been? My father's words came back to me, as if from some faded dream.

_She brought out the worst in you. While you were with her, it was like you enjoyed showing the world just how bad you could be_

Forcing myself to focus through my drunkenness, I met her eyes. "It's not gonna happen Tanya. Never again. Never. Again."

I raised myself up and closed the door on her, tapping the hood of the car for the cabbie to go. As I stumbled away, I could faintly hear the profanities spewing from the closed cab.

ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

"Oh God, make it stop!" I moaned. The ringing in my ears grew louder, and for the hundredth time that night, I cursed my god-damned uncle for his yearly god-damned auction. I cursed Tanya for showing up and pissing me off. I cursed all the nosy fuckers staring at me after my winning bid was announced. And most of all, I cursed Jose Cuervo, creator of Cuervo Gold, for making a tequila that went down so smoothly. Damn you straight to hell Cuervo.

The ringing continued insistently, pounding through my head like a giant sledgehammer. I groaned and brought a pillow over my head, trying to stop the banging, the ringing, the spinning, the splitting.

But the ringing kept getting louder. Reluctantly, I pushed off the pillow and opened one eye slowly. A faint sliver of sunlight streamed through the window, as reluctant to usher in a new day as I was. Hesitantly, I opened my other eye only to have a sharp stab of pain from the glare hit me right between the eyes. I winced and closed my eyes again.

The infernal ringing continued. Louder. More insistent. I put the pillow over my head again. And then another. And then the covers. But the banging in my brain continued. And so did the ringing. Ring, ring, ring. Ring, ring, Ring. Ring, ring, ring.

"Fuuuuck!" I growled, throwing off the covers and the pillows and sitting up all at once, which one should never ever do during a hangover. The room spun in a perfect circle and I almost tossed what was left of Cuervo on the carpet.

The phone. The constant ring, ring, ring was coming from my land line. I reached over and snatched it up quickly. "Hello!" I growled hoarsely.

"Mr. Cullen! This is Rick from Manhattan Volvo. I've been trying to get in touch with you all morning." My eyes scanned the clock quickly. The glare from the digits hurt my eyes, but I could more or less make out an eight with some other unreadable numbers after it. Shit, I was going to be late to the office.

Suddenly, I remembered it was Friday morning. My new Volvo was supposed to be delivered today. Just in time for Bella and Maddie to come home. I could pick them up from the airport in my new, safe, dependable Volvo.

"Yeah Rick. What's up? Is the car ready?"

"Well…there's just a small problem Mr. Cullen. One of my fellow salesmen accidentally sold and delivered your car to another customer yesterday, and it'll be a few days before we can get another silver Volvo with all the upgrades you requested."

I groaned and threw myself back on the bed. Another thing you shouldn't do with a hangover. With the splitting headache I had going, it felt more like throwing myself back onto a wall of bricks.

My brain rattled and I winced in pain. I yelled into the phone, "What the hell kind of dealership are you guys running over there? In my business, if I delivered the wrong product to the wrong client, I'd get a foot up my ass!" – I pictured Emmett and Jasper beating the shit out of me for making that sort of mistake.

"You're right Mr. Cullen, you're right. We're very sorry. Here at Manhattan Volvo, we pride ourselves on our service-"

"Good! So get me my car today like I was promised!"

"I'm afraid we can't do that. But to show you how sorry we are and how much we appreciate your business, we're going to throw in a couple of upgrades for free."

"I don't want any more god-damned upgrades! I want my car! Today!"

"I'm really sorry Mr. Cullen, but that's just not going to be possible. Now, we can throw in a year's free Satellite radio service and-"

"I don't want free Satellite."

"Please Mr. Cullen. What can we do to make you happy?" Rick begged.

I lowered my head and pinched the bridge of my nose. This shit was making my headache a thousand times worse. But I was starting to feel bad for Rick. From the sound of his voice, I got the feeling he _would_ be getting a foot up his ass if he couldn't find a way to fix this situation and keep me happy. I exhaled. Well, apparently there was no way I'd be getting the Volvo today, or in time to pick up Maddie and Bella from the airport, so what could I get for this screw-up? The whole point of getting this car was to have something safer to drive Bella and Maddie around in. To make them more comfortable.

"Hey Rick, you know what you can do for me? I need a built-in car seat and a DVD player."

ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

The pounding in my head continued as I made my way into Starbucks for a much needed cup of coffee. Of course, as luck would have it, the line was practically out the friggin' door. While I waited in line, I thought about calling Bella, but then remembered it would only be a bit past six in the morning over in Washington. I felt anxious, uneasy, and when the memories of the thoughts running through my head last night finally surfaced, I felt guilt and shame color my face. Thank God Bella hadn't answered the phone last night. Who knows what kind of crap would've spewed from my mouth in the condition I was in. Rubbing my temples, I tried to get rid of the pounding in my brain. No way could this morning get any shittier.

But when my eyes happened to glance at the paper the lady in front of me had open, my whole body froze and I realized that, oh yeah, it definitely could.

'**Eddie C. Back to Old Games, Old Flames'** read the headline to Page Six.

Below the headline were various pictures of me from last night at the charity auction. One of me standing next to the bidding table, with Tanya draped all over me. Another of me throwing back a shot at the bar. Another one of me throwing back another shot at the table my family and I shared. And then the last picture. _Fuck_, the last picture had me practically on top of Tanya in the cab, when my drunk ass had almost fallen on top of her after she'd tried to pull me in. Apparently – and although I had no memory of it myself – I'd pulled myself up by using her upper thighs as leverage. And although I knew I'd just been struggling to get upright, from the picture it looked like I'd been feeling her up with the cab door open.

I closed my eyes. "Oh fuck, fuck, fuck," I groaned quietly. I opened my eyes again and headed out the door to the nearest newspaper stand. With growing apprehension, I snatched up a paper and threw a bill in the direction of the guy. With a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, I turned to the cursed gossip columns.

**PAGE SIX**

**October 15, 2010**

**Eddie C. Back to Old Games, Old Flames**

**NYC's favorite playboy is back in action! After lying low for weeks, during which we were all starting to worry, Millionaire Playboy Edward Cullen was spotted at the Annual Charity Auction held at the Waldorf Astoria by his uncle, high-powered attorney Aro Volturi of the Volturi Group, LLC. Eddie wasted no time in getting busy with long-time on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali. The two were spotted getting cozy by the bidding table, where Eddie put in a bid for an expensive sapphire and diamond set which he later won. Wonder if we'll see Tanya sporting that little gift around the city? Although one source told us Eddie might have another girl in mind for the set. Our source was only able to give us the initials - PLG! Anyone got any ideas? Afterwards Eddie let loose with more than his fair share of tequila shots around the ballroom. "Drunk or not, he still looked good enough to eat!" exclaimed one happy attendee to the auction. And when the night finally ended for the two love birds, they apparently had a hard time waiting to get home, as we witnessed more than a little groping going on in the back seat of the cab! Oh yeah! Eddie's back!**

"Oh Jesus," I croaked, crumbling the paper in my hands. With blinding fury, I made my way across the street, slamming the crumbled paper into the nearest garbage can. I pushed my way through the revolving doors, my mind racing with a thousand questions while I rode up the elevator to the twenty-third floor.

What the hell- How the hell- Getting cozy? Cozy! And- and Tanya sporting the sapphires around the city? TANYA! And who in the name of God's green Earth was PLG? Where the hell did that come from? I groaned loud, hanging my head and earning raised eyebrows and strange stares from the other people in the elevator – as I remembered the last part of the fucking article, and that final picture of me 'groping' Tanya in the back seat of the cab.

Thank. God. Thank God almighty in heaven that Bella was in Washington, I thought to myself as I stepped out of the elevator. The best I could hope for was that this shit would blow over and disappear before she came back this weekend. This was the last thing I needed if I wanted to convince her that I was trying to change, to be better.

Breathing hard and nostrils flaring, I stormed into my office, not even bothering to greet Angela on my way in. But before I could slam the door shut behind me, Angela got up and walked over to me quickly.

"Um, Edward, good morning."

I pursed my lips, but then felt bad about how obviously uncomfortable Angela looked. "Good morning Angela."

"Uh, Emmett and Jasper wanted me to tell you to meet them in Rosalie's office as soon as you got in this morning."

I rolled my eyes, huffing angrily. Angela's eyes grew wide and she took a step back.

"I'm sorry Angela," I said, feeling like an ass. "I've had a bad morning." She just nodded her head. I sighed. "Please call Rosalie and let her know I'm on my way down." She nodded again and walked back to her desk.

I took the stairs down to twenty-two, my brain pounding painfully into my skull with every step I took. Fuck, how could I have been so stupid, I thought. But then, I hadn't done anything wrong! Everything, from the way Tanya had rubbed herself up against me by the bidding table, to who I'd been buying the necklace for, to why I'd been drinking so much, and finally, to why my hands had been on Tanya's thighs, was wrong! Had been taken completely out of context! I chuckled angrily as I exited onto Rosalie's floor. Two months ago, this wouldn't have meant jack shit to me; I would've completely ignored the pictures and the articles, laughed at them actually. I took a deep breath again, trying to calm myself before stepping into Rosalie's office. Thank God, I thought again, that Bella was thousands of miles away. How would I explain this cluster-fuck to her?

As soon as I opened the door to Rosalie's office, I knew Rose was pissed off at me. And when I glanced down at her desk, I could see why. She had a copy of the New York Post tucked neatly into the corner. I took a deep breath and sat down on one of the chairs.

Emmett and Jasper, sitting on the opposite side of the room, both gave me a wry smile, somewhere between amusement and exasperation. I ignored them.

"Edward, glad you could finally join us," Rose began in a condescending tone.

"I've had a difficult morning," I answered dryly.

"Yes, well, I've heard that's what happens when you nurse a hangover with cheap sex."

I clenched my jaw, a nasty retort on the tip of my tongue, but I didn't want to get into this now, not with Rosalie. "Whatever Rose. Can we just get on with it?"

Jasper answered. "Actually, we've been waiting for you for a while, but you were so late this morning…" - I glared at him – "Okay. Well, a decision had to be made right away so we went ahead and made it without you, but I don't think you'll disagree, so it should be fine."

I raised my eyebrows. "Decision about what?"

Emmett frowned, as if I should've known what he was talking about. I stared at him blankly. He rolled his eyes.

"The Cartwrights called this morning," Emmett said, as if he were reminding me instead of telling me for the first time. "Said they were really happy with the presentation the other day and all." He shifted around his seat uncomfortably. "But we all saw that Lauren didn't play her part too well. What happened there, I don't know. I'll let Rosie deal with that."

"Oh it's been dealt with," Rosalie huffed.

"Basically, what it comes down to," Jasper took over, "is that the Cartwrights aren't happy with her anymore. They want her off the account effective immediately."

I shrugged. "That's fine by me."

Emmett smiled. "Good. Good." He clapped his hands. "Now, we've got to work quickly to bring Bella up to speed with the entire-"

I put up a hand to stop him. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bella? Bella's taking over the account?"

Emmett looked at me again as if that should've been plainly obvious. "Yes."

"But I thought…I assumed Rosalie would take it over again…" I trailed off, looking at Rose.

Rose shook her head. "I've got too much on my plate right now. In fact, I'm trying to hand over some other accounts to Bella. I know she can handle it. And besides, the Cartwrights specifically requested Bella take over the account. It was pretty much a stipulation in order for them to proceed with the campaign."

The Cartwrights. Those dirty old bastards. The entire time I'd known them, they ogled every attractive woman in this office every time they stepped foot in here. From Rose, to Angela, and then Lauren. When Lauren had been placed in charge of their account, they'd practically drooled with delight. And Lauren ate it all up. The way they practically undressed her with their eyes, the suggestive way they took her hand during meetings in the office. And now Bella. Now they wanted to do that to Bella. To treat her like a piece of meat. Eye candy here for their own personal enjoyment.

No way in hell.

"No way in hell," I said.

Rose threw up her hands. Emmett and Jasper groaned and grabbed on to the sides of their chairs.

"Why not?" Emmett asked. "Bella's more than qualified to take over! She's the one who basically got them to the table for us."

"I know she's qualified Emmett. I know she can handle it."

"Then what's the problem?" Jasper asked.

My eyes moved to Rosalie. She was smirking, her eyes daring me.

"The problem is…I don't think…Bella…should be working with the Cartwrights that closely."

"Why not?" Emmett asked again.

"Because." I took a deep breath. "Because the Cartwrights are a couple of old perverts, and I don't think Bella'd feel comfortable working so closely with them."

"That's bullshit and you know it." Rosalie spat. "Bella's a grown woman. She can take care of herself. Besides, the Cartwrights are harmless. All they'll ever do is look; they'd never cross the line."

"And you think that's okay?" I asked through clenched teeth. "You think its okay for them to look at her, at _any_ woman as if she's just a piece of meat?"

"No, I don't think its okay! But it's the reality of the world we live in! Men are going to look, and some a bit more than others. You just have to deal with it and move on."

"Just because you don't seem to mind having a couple of old, wrinkly fucks undressing you with their eyes doesn't mean Bella won't. She deserves to be treated with respect and given her privacy! And besides, this company has a reputation to protect-"

Emmett stood up and walked over to stand in front of me. "Hold on there brother," he scowled, his breathing heavier, "You fucking watch how you speak to my wife!"

I stood up to face him. "I didn't mean-"

"Relax Emmett," Rosalie interrupted, in a calm voice. She stood up slowly and made her way around her desk over to where we stood facing each other, gently nudging her husband out of the way and coming to stand in front of me. Her expression was cool and composed, but from the way here blue eyes burned, practically tinged with red, I knew one thing.

I was fucked.

"I'll take care of this honey," she cooed to Emmett keeping her daggers trained on me. "You have the nerve, the utter gall, to call the Cartwrights perverts, after the way you act around town, the way _you_ treat women."

"If you're talking about what was in the papers today-"

"I don't give a shit about what was in the papers today Edward. It's old news. Just another day in the life of Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy."

"That's-"

"You're going to come in here and talk about perverts, and the reputation of this company, and giving Bella the privacy she deserves, after the shit you've been pulling?"

What to do? Stay shut, or ask her what the fuck she was talking about? The smarter thing would've probably been to just stay shut. But what would've been the fun in that?

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh don't you? You're so worried about perverts and privacy and reputations, maybe you should take a look at yourself. After all, who the hell was locked in a conference room doing Lauren a few weeks ago?"

"What?" Emmett and Jasper barked at the same time. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Yup. Fucked. Royally.

Rose put a hand up to shush them. "And privacy? You're worried about Bella being ogled and her privacy? That doesn't seem to weigh on your mind too much when you stand in a corner like a little pervert, hiding behind your newspaper every morning and afternoon watching Bella come and go. I'm sure your eyes aren't pasted to her pocket book as she walks by."

"Aw shit!" Jasper moaned.

Emmett looked as if he were about to faint. He opened his mouth but no words came out for about five seconds. Finally, all he could manage was a squeaky "What?"

"That's different," was all I could pitifully manage.

"That's different?" Rose snickered. "Oh really? And how is that different? Because it's you? Because your intentions are oh so good and honorable?" she cooed sarcastically. "Oh yeah, you proved last night how good and honorable your intentions are."

"That article's a fucking lie!" I hissed.

"Pictures don't lie Edward! You were practically dry humping Tanya in the back seat of that cab." She shook her head and gave me a disgusted look. "I told you not to play games with her."

"I'm not playing-" – I started, but then stopped. It was useless. I'd never convince Rose.

"Look, believe what you want. But all it comes down to is that I don't want Bella working with the Cartwrights."

She snorted, looking at me incredulously. "So on top of everything else, you're going to be a selfish prick and hold her back just so you can be the only pervert ogling her."

"Stop calling me a god-damned pervert!"

Rosalie eyed me for a while, and then abruptly walked away. "I'm done talking to you," she said dismissively, walking towards her door and swinging it open. "The decision's been made. Now get out of my office."

I stormed over to her, beyond furious, deaf and blind to everything other than the fact that Bella would _not _be another piece of meat for those two assholes. "The decision has _not_ been made!" I hissed loudly. "I want Bella off the Cartwright account, and Lauren back on!"

A sudden gasp, followed by a slight movement in my periphery made me look up, and I froze. Standing just outside Rosalie's door, with a look of hurt and shock, stood Bella.

The room spun, and all of a sudden I felt sicker than I had the whole god-damned morning. But before I could even wonder how the hell she'd gotten there, the shock leached out of Bella's brown eyes and quickly morphed into something else, a frozen, expressionless gaze; no warmth, no feelings, and sure as hell no melted chocolate.

"I'm sorry for interrupting," she said in an eerily cool voice, turning quickly away from me and moving her eyes to Rose. "Rosalie, you wanted to talk about today's changes, but I guess I'll come back." Her eyes flashed to Emmett, then Jasper and finally quickly to me. But there was nothing there to indicate anything more than professional courtesy. Not warmth, not even anger. Nothing at all.

"Gentlemen," she said, giving us a small nod, and then walked away.

Immediately I made to follow her, but Emmett gripped my shoulder tightly, keeping me in place. I turned around to protest but one look at him and Jasper told me I'd be lucky if I made it out of there with all my appendages, much less any time in the near future.

I looked over at Rose, all the fight suddenly gone out of me.

"Rose, please. Just tell her…tell her that's not how I meant it."

Rosalie opened her mouth – ready to curse me out some more, but then her expression changed. She suddenly looked almost sorry for me.

"I'm not going to fix your fuck-ups for you Edward. You're a grown man. What I am going to do is go reiterate to Bella that the changes to the Cartwright account we discussed this morning still stand. She's the new head of the account. I'll say nothing more, and nothing less." She shrugged and shook her head. "The rest is for you to handle."

She walked out, closing the door behind her. I turned back to Emmett and Jasper. In their faces I saw exactly what I'd done that damn day in that godforsaken conference room. I'd jeopardized not only the agency's reputation, but theirs as well. I'd let them down. And now it was time to pay the pied piper.

After about ten false starts, Emmett threw his hands up in the air. "I don't even know where to begin. Lauren? Bella? You do realize these women work for us, don't you?"

"Look, whatever you want to say to me, you're absolutely right. I just need to say two things. First, please don't put Lauren and Bella in the same sentence together. They're two completely different women, and two completely different situations. Second, nothing happened with Lauren in that conference room."

Emmett and Jasper both arched a disbelieving eyebrow at the same time.

"Well, not _nothing_," I conceded. "But we didn't…close the deal, if you know what I mean."

"Ugh," Jasper growled in disgust, walking closer to me. "The conference room Edward? The conference room? Do you realize what could've happened if-"

"I know. I know. I'm sorry. I just…I wasn't thinking with my head."

"Yeah, I think you _were_ thinking with your head, but not the right one," Emmett snickered. I vaguely recalled Rosalie making a similar comment the day of the incident.

"Yeah, I guess."

"And what the hell is going on with Bella?" Emmett asked. "Are you screwing around with _her_ now?"

"No, I'm not _screwing_ around with her," I said with a scowl. "Bella's not like that. She's different. Everything's different with her."

"You do realize you're her boss Edward, don't you? And how completely inappropriate this is?"

The truth is, while I'd thought about it, I hadn't really paid that fact much mind. Now it looked like it wouldn't even matter. I shuddered, remembering how vacant her eyes had been when she'd looked at me.

"Awwhh fuck!" I groaned, running my hand through my hair. "Why the hell didn't any one tell me she was back?" I asked, ignoring Emmett's question.

Jasper gave me an exasperated glare. "We did tell you. We called you and left you a message, told you all about the situation with the Cartwrights and that Bella was back and we were going to talk to her about taking over the account. Don't you check your damned phone? And Alice has been trying to get a hold of you all morning too."

Frowning, I pulled my cell phone from my pocket. Sure enough, there were seven missed calls. Two from the office, three from Alice, and two – _craaap!_ - two from Bella; one late last night and one early this morning. I'd been so drunk and hung over I hadn't even felt my phone vibrating. And all that ringing this morning- it'd probably been more than just Rick from Manhattan Volvo calling.

I shoved my phone back in my pocket and headed for the door.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Where are you going?" Emmett asked, putting his hand up to keep the door closed. "We're not done here."

I turned back to face Emmett and Jasper again. "Look, I know I screwed up with Lauren. I have absolutely no excuse. All I can do is assure you both that nothing like that will ever happen again." Emmett and Jasper glared at me doubtfully. I wished there was something I could say to erase that look from their faces, but right now, I had bigger concerns.

"We can finish discussing this later if you both want, but right now, I need to go speak to Bella." I pulled open the door, and after a couple of seconds of hard glaring, Emmett reluctantly lowered his hand and moved away.

As I rushed through the corridors towards Bella's cube, I tried to think of what to say to her; how to explain why I'd told Rosalie to take her off the account. But even as I formulated my reason in my head, I felt a wave of disgust hit me. Rosalie had been right. It had been a stupid and selfish reason. As much as I hated the Cartwrights, they were too smart to jeopardize the success we'd brought to their brand by crossing any lines. They'd look, but that's all they'd ever do.

I passed Lauren and one of the girls from production as I turned the corner to Bella's cube, vaguely aware of the way Lauren leaned in to whisper something in the other girl's ear as I passed them, and then the sound of their giggles behind me.

Taking the last couple of strides to Bella's small cube, I racked my brain for something to say, some way to fix the mess I'd just created.

"Bella, I-" I began, before realizing there was no one in her cube. She'd stepped away, and I'd have to wait to make my apologies. _That's fine_, I thought to myself. It would give me a minute to regroup. Willing my heart rate to slow down, I took stock of the situation.

It wasn't so bad. I mean, it was bad, but it wasn't the end of the world or anything. Sure, I'd acted like an ass back there in Rosalie's office, but I'd just explain it to Bella. I'd just come clean and tell her the truth; that I wasn't used to dealing with jealousy and I'd overreacted. She might be pissed, but she'd understand, right? She'd said she wanted to know the real me. Well this was the real me, jealous and overprotective and just plain stupid sometimes. I'd promise her I wouldn't overreact again, and then we'd take it from there. We could go to lunch today, pick up Maddie after work and…

My eyes fell on her desk. With a sinking heart and a sick stomach I realized I'd need more words than just those needed to explain this morning.

Folded neatly in half and open to Page Six lay today's New York Post. Its headline glared up at me tauntingly in big, black bold letters:

**Eddie C. Back to Old Games, Old Flames**

**

* * *

**

**A/N: Hmm. Did you all really thing it would be that easy? He's been a player for years. At some point that crap had to come back and bite him in the ass. I think I recall a certain clairvoyant sister warning him about that. And no matter how much we love Eddie, that thing with Lauren was just plain wrong. **

**Anyway, trust me people. What would be the fun of E & B meet, like each other, date, get married, have babies and live HEA? Oh, I know! You guys want to see them getting together already! THEY WILL. SOON. PROMISE.**

**Bella's POV next. Reviews are almost better than a drunk Edward falling on top of you. Leave one. Thx!**


	13. Chapter 12 Let Down

**A/N: Okay, so some of you seem to want to come at me with pitch forks after that last chapter! All I can do is reiterate what I said in my A/N last chapter. Our past tends to come back and bite us in the arse (I love that word). As for Edward not deserving what happened because he didn't really do anything, the reality of life is that it isn't always fair. The public and paparazzi have come to expect certain behavior from him and the only way he's going to turn that around is by staying away from situations that can get him in trouble. ****And for those who wish E & B would've gotten a little further in their 'relationship' before this happened, ask yourselves this. Would it have been harder or easier to understand and forgive now, or if they'd already been in a relationship?**

**A little bonus chapter this week. Danna0724 betad it super quick, so I decided to post it now instead of waiting until next week. Thanks sweets, and thanks for the 'twin guns!'**

**All characters (except for Maddie -she's my baby) belong to S. Meyer. I've just moved them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 12 – Let Down**

**Chapter Song – Torn, by Natalie Imbruglia**

**BPOV**

_The green and yellow leaves rustled in the breeze, falling softly from the huge trees surrounding the red and white brick buildings. I stood in front of one of the structures, the big clock tower that had stood here for over two hundred years, biting my lip nervously. _

_Dartmouth College was everything I'd expected, and more. Much to my bitter disappointment. I'd come on this trip hoping to hate the school. Hoping its portfolio had greatly exaggerated its beauty, its New England charm, the impressiveness of its undergraduate faculty and programs. But much to my dismay, I'd loved it. The way the New Hampshire sun shone brightly in the morning, casting a brilliant light on the old buildings below, the way the student body strolled around campus, studying out on the warm, dry lawn, the faculty's seemingly genuine concern for its alumni. It was a small school; only about two thousand applicants were admitted each year, and this year I'd been one of the lucky few accepted into next year's freshmen class._

_And I was going to throw it all away._

_It wasn't like I could leave Paul behind. We'd argued all week about this trip to New Hampshire. I'd promised Angela months ago, before I'd met Paul, that we'd come take a look at the school in early spring if we were accepted. But so much had changed in the past few months. I wasn't so sure I wanted New Hampshire anymore. But I knew I had to at least come look at the school, at least give myself a chance to change my mind. Deep inside though, I knew my mind was already made up. _

_Angela came up behind me, quivering with excitement. "What do you think?"_

_It was obvious how much she'd loved the school. She'd done nothing but ooh and ahh through the whole tour, pointing out this and that, how state of the art the Chemistry Department was, how friendly and knowledgeable the professors in the Lit Department were. I'd smiled tightly and gnawed on the inside of my lip through the whole thing. _

_"It's okay," I murmured, glaring accusingly at the clock tower – as if it was somehow to blame for my predicament._

_"Okay?" Angela repeated. "What do you mean 'its okay'? It's everything you and I have dreamt of for the past couple of years of high school!"_

_"I'm...not so sure I'd fit in here. I mean, it's so different from Forks. And it's so far away from everything..."_

_Angela glared at me suspiciously. "You mean it's so far away from __**him**__."_

_I didn't answer. I couldn't even make myself look at her. I knew how stupid I was being; like one of those love sick teenagers on those Nick at Nite TV shows Jessica and I used to make fun of. Funny thing was __**I**__ could've done the long-distance relationship thing. But I hadn't been given much of a choice._

_"What's the point?" Paul had asked one day. "If you go to school there, you and I are over. I don't do long-distance relationships." He'd said it plainly; no hostility or threat or desperation or anxiousness in his tone. Just, matter-of-factly. You go, it's over._

_Not much of a choice. At least, that's what I'd thought at the time. _

_"Angela, I-"_

_Angela shook her head and narrowed her eyes at me. "I can't believe I'm hearing this. Not from you Bella."_

_I finally made myself look at her. This disappointment in her expression hurt, but not as much as the thought of not being with Paul._

_"This was our dream Bella," she reminded me._

_"Dreams change."_

_Now it was her turn to look away, to stare up at the clock tower._

_"You know, I've held my tongue for months Bella, because you're one of my best friends, and I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship. And because I hoped that you'd come to your senses on your own."_

_As much as I valued Angela, I couldn't help bristling at her tone. "What the heck does that mean?" I asked, irritation seeping into my voice._

_"It means you're blind when it comes to Paul! I've watched one of my best friends turn into a lovesick fool in the last few months over a guy who doesn't even deserve her!"_

_Love sick fool? Sure, it was pretty close to how I'd just described myself, but that didn't mean I wanted to hear it from someone else._

_"Angela, you don't know anything about my relationship with Paul!"_

_"I don't know anything?" she asked incredulously, throwing her hands up in frustration. "Bella, the whole town knows all the crap he pulls behind your back! I'm tired of listening to it! I'm tired of hoping you'll wake up and just tell him to fuck off before it's too late!"_

_I jerked my head back in surprise. Angela wasn't the swearing type. Neither one of us was. _

_In a weak attempt to defend myself I said, "I don't care what jealous, gossipy people say. You know that Angela."_

_Angela sighed. "Bella, I don't want to get into this with you." Her expression softened and she took my hand. "Look, all I'm going to tell you is to think about this. Please. This is probably one of the biggest decisions you'll make in your life," she stressed. "Don't base it on a guy Bella. Don't let a guy hold you back because he's too selfish to put your needs before his." She took a deep breath. "Think about what's right for __**you**__. What __**you **__need. Because you know what? That's what Paul's thinking of. His needs, not yours."_

_We stared at each other for a long time, her eyes begging me to reconsider a decision we both knew I'd already made. Until a loud noise made us both look up at a large green-and-white-uniform clad crowd heading our way, cheering loudly. The swarm of kids suddenly surrounded us, and in the crowd and pushing and rushing, I lost Angela. Turning around in a semi-circle and searching for my friend, I suddenly felt the strangest sensation, like a warm tingling rising from the tips of my toes to the crown of my head, and then a strange, almost electric pull towards the center of the crowd. I could barely see over the tops of the soccer players heads as they carried someone on their shoulders. The crowd was too big though, and I was too small. And in the end all I glimpsed was a mess of bronze hair waving wildly in the breeze._

_When I was finally reunited with Angela, she had a curious smile on her face. "Did you see him?" she asked._

_"See who?"_

_"The guy they were carrying! The captain of the soccer team!" she squealed, which was funny, because Angela never squealed. "He was Absolutely. Gorgeous."_

_I shrugged and shook my head, feeling strangely disappointed that I'd missed him. Angela put her arms around my shoulders and slowly, we walked back towards town, to the hotel where her parents waited for us._

_"Another reason to come to Dartmouth," she said abruptly, as we walked, "very cute guys." I laughed. She turned me towards her. "Who knows? Maybe if you play your cards right, you might even date that gorgeous soccer captain someday." _

_I rolled my eyes, doubting it highly. _

_Back at Forks a couple of days later, Jessica twiddled her fingers nervously while we hung out in my room. It was clear she had something on her mind. I put down my book and looked over at her, where she sat anxiously on my windowsill._

_"Okay, spill," I finally said. "I know you've got something to say."_

_Jessica smiled apologetically, but it was hard to buy, considering how anxious she seemed to talk. _

_"I've got something to tell you, only I don't know how you'll take it."_

_"Just say it, whatever it is."_

_That's all the encouragement she needed. The words spilled out of her like an overflowing cup, and with more excitement than apology. "Well, a bunch of us were at Tyler's house last week? Just hanging out you know? And Paul showed up with Jared and a couple of other guys from La Push, and well..." she trailed off, looking up at me sheepishly through her eyelashes. Except I knew there was nothing sheepish about Jessica._

_"And..." I prompted._

_"And well, you know, there were a couple of girls there from school. You know Cindy, the cheerleader?"_

_I pursed my lips. "Yeah, I know Cindy." Well, I knew of her. Cheerleaders and Bella Swan didn't exactly run in the same circles._

_Jessica sighed dramatically before continuing. "Bella, Mike caught Paul making out with her in the kitchen. I mean, from what he says, they were really going at it. I'm talking heavy groping and panting, and-"_

_I cut her off. "Alright Jessica, I get it." I felt sick, nauseous, hurt, betrayed. Strangely enough, I wasn't surprised. That right there should've been a sign to high tail it to New Hampshire on the first plane outta there. But I was, as they said, a lovesick teenager._

_Jessica walked over to the bed and sat down next to me. "I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you Bella. But I thought you deserved to know." _

_I stared at her hands, unable to meet her eyes. Even though she'd said she was sorry, her voice didn't sound it. In fact, she sounded almost...buzzed about the whole thing._

_The next night, while we sat outside my house in Paul's car after the movies, I confronted him with what Jessica told me. _

_His lips, which had been trailing up and down my neck, froze, and I felt him stiffen beside me. But when he sat up there was nothing contrite or remorseful in his expression. In fact, he was wearing a wry grin. _

_"This fucking waste-of-time trip of yours to New Hampshire's been more trouble than it was worth."_

_**What the hell does that mean?**__ I thought. I wrinkled my brows. I'd been expecting a denial, or an apology, some begging and groveling maybe. And his bringing up my trip again - after I'd already told him I'd decided to go to Washington State, with him - just fanned the flames that had been burning inside all day and all night._

_"I shouldn't have to worry about what you're doing every time I turn my back," I hissed. The tears burned in my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Paul wasn't the type to be affected by signs of weakness anyway. _

_He snorted, and in a flat tone answered, "If you were so worried, maybe you shouldn't have left." _

_I stared at him incredulously, even though he wouldn't meet my gaze. "So what are you saying? Once I'm out of state, anything goes?"_

_"I didn't say that."_

_I rubbed my temples, the confusion growing and giving me a horrible headache. "__**So what are you saying?**__" I repeated, hating the way my voice trembled._

_Finally, he turned to face me. His dark eyes were cool, completely unperturbed. "I'm saying if you'd been here, you would've been the one with me at Tyler's house."_

_I felt as if a ton of bricks had landed on my heart. "So you're admitting-"_

_Finally, something cracked in his expression, some sort of emotion. But when he met my gaze, it wasn't with a look of shame, or apology. It was frustration lining his dark brow._

_"All I'm saying Bella, is that I had a few drinks and got a bit wasted. I probably ended up in the kitchen at some point at the same time as that chick, and your jealous pussy of a friend Newton turned it into more than what it was. Now are you going to believe me, or are you going to believe that prick?"_

_I glared at him, my emotions warring inside of me, my stomach tied in painful knots. _

_"Well?" he asked after a few moments, more defensive than anything else._

_I took a deep breath. "Next time watch how much you drink," I scowled. "I don't like coming back to Forks and having to hear all these rumors about what you were doing while I was gone."_

_He chuckled, completely unfazed by my irritation. "Don't leave again and you won't have to."_

_I kept glaring at him. All of a sudden he laughed and threw his arms around me, pulling me into him until I felt my body betraying me and molding itself into his arms. _

_He chuckled, cold, and calculated. Like someone patting himself on the back. _

_"Look Bella," he said, pulling away enough to grab my face in his hands. At the time, his next words had thrilled me, had made me feel wanted, needed, loved. "Here in Forks, with me, is where you belong. Don't ever forget that. If you leave, I'll always find a way to bring you back to me. Remember that. Always."_

_It wasn't until much, much later, when I'd grown older and wiser due to time and circumstances, that I'd realized he'd never actually denied fooling around with the cheerleader. And that his words had been more of a warning than a declaration of love._

* * *

"Mommy, I caught one!" Maddie cried excitedly, breaking me out of my thoughts. My dad helped her reel in whatever salt water creature they'd ensnared underwater. I shuddered, picturing the way it would look as it broke to the surface; eyes and mouth wide open and impaled on the little silver hook, wriggling and swallowing unwanted air. It'd gone for the bait having no idea what awaited it. For some reason I shuddered again.

"That's…wonderful honey!" I said, trying to sound supportive while suppressing a grimace. I heard chuckling behind me and turned to find Jake watching me. His dark eyes danced with barely contained amusement. He lay sprawled out on the grass, his huge arms supporting his head as he continued to chuckle.

I narrowed my eyes. "What's so funny?"

He snickered, sitting up and scooting over on his behind to where I sat by the edge of the Sol-Duc, watching Maddie and my dad fly-fishing.

"Become a real city girl, haven't 'cha?" he teased. "Can't even stand to watch a little fish get plucked out of the water?"

I rolled my eyes, picking up a piece of soft grass and twirling it around my finger. "First of all, you know I've never liked fishing, or hunting, or any other sport where I have to watch an animal take its last breath. And second, I'm sure there's as much fishing in New York as there is here in Washington."

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I thought of Edward, and the night of my birthday, when he'd offered to take Maddie out on his family's boat. Thinking of Edward in front of Jake made me feel guilty for some reason, and in response, I could feel my face start to burn. I turned away, pretending to take in the view of the Olympic range - the way the sun hid behind the clouded mountains - before Jake could see me.

I closed my eyes tightly. I had to stop this. Jake wasn't stupid, and I was surprised as it was that I'd been able to get through the past few days without cluing him into Edward. It wasn't that I wanted to keep it a secret - whatever _it_ was - I just wasn't ready to have this conversation with Jake. And I had no idea what was going on between Edward and me anyway. What exactly _would_ I tell Jake?

"So you bought your tickets then?" Jake asked suddenly.

I made sure the heat left my face before I turned back to him.

"Yes. We'll be leaving early afternoon tomorrow."

He considered this for a minute. "I don't see what the big rush is. The hearing was this morning. You could've stayed through the weekend. Maybe that fancy lawyer of yours could've convinced Paul and his lawyer to sign those papers if-"

I sighed. "Jake, both you and I know Paul's not going to sign those papers now." I fought back the wave of nausea that hit me, remembering the sickening disappointment I'd felt a few hours ago, after Jenks had called to tell me that he'd spoken to Paul's lawyer again early this afternoon, and that his lawyer confirmed that Paul had no intention of signing the application to terminate his parental rights. He'd dropped the petition to appeal for visitation that had brought me back to Washington in the first place, but he wasn't going to sign away his rights. After everything he'd done. After proving to me time and time again that he didn't care at all for Maddie. After basically telling Jake that the only reason he'd even filed the petition was to get me to come back to Washington. He wasn't done with his games. Well, I wasn't going to hang around and find out what he had planned.

Jake scowled, his dark eyes growing darker, his big hands fisting into the ground at his sides and pulling up large mounds of dirt and grass.

"I should've killed him when I had the chance," he hissed. I glanced over at Maddie quickly; she was busy with her grandpa, unhooking the poor fish.

"Calm down Jake," I said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Fighting with Paul again wouldn't have solved anything. Besides, you know he doesn't fight fair. I'm just glad he seems to have left town again."

Jake's breathing came in hard for a few minutes while I sat there, pulling nervously at the grass and waiting for him to relax.

His features finally relaxed, and he let go of the destroyed patch of meadow around him. In a calmer voice he said, "That's why I don't understand why you have to leave home so soon. He's gone Bella. And even if he wasn't, I wouldn't have let him anywhere near you and Maddie. Neither would your dad."

How to explain to him that as much as I missed him and my dad, Forks just didn't feel like home anymore? That it had stopped feeling like home a long time ago actually.

"Jake," I said softly, "I have a home in New York now. And I have a job that I have to get back to. And Maddie has a routine she's really happy with, a sitter who's great with her, and friends-"

Jake snorted, his hand picking nervously at what was left of grass again. Between the both of us, we were going to leave this poor field bare.

"She's four Bella. What does she know about routines and friends?"

"Hey. How long have you and I been friends? I seem to vaguely recall being six and playing in the sand-box with a little dark-haired four year old boy who kept insisting that he'd pee in the sand unless I kissed him."

Jake snickered. "Hey it's not my fault if you fell for that."

"She's got good friends," I assured him. And just then, I heard her little voice - bits and pieces of a conversation with her grandfather - carried in the breeze.

"My best fwend Edwood says that the fishies in New Yawk don't mind the duhty watuh. He calls it" – she paused to think of the word, her little brow furrowing in concentration – "Pootion," she said, beaming proudly.

"I think you mean pollution Maddie Mo," my dad corrected gently.

"Yeah, Pootion," she repeated, "and he says that…"

Her voice trailed off and I stiffened, wondering what else she was telling her grandfather about her best friend. It'd been like this practically since the moment we'd stepped off the airplane a few days ago. Her best friend Edward this; her best friend Edward that.

Jake apparently heard bits of Maddie's conversation with my dad too.

"Boy, she's really fond of that kid Edward, isn't she? Doesn't stop talking about him."

I smiled, but didn't answer. I'd neither denied nor confirmed any information on Edward, or exactly how _old _Maddie's best friend was.

"He sounds like a fairy," Jacob said abruptly, causing me to choke on my own saliva.

"What?" I croaked, once I stopped coughing. "Why would you say _that_?"

"Well he goes to _ballet_ with her, doesn't he?" Jake explained. "What kind of boy goes to ballet class? And she says he draws castles and princesses with her? I mean, seriously, when I was four I was playing with guns, learning to throw punches, tricking naïve six-year old girls into kissing me," he smirked, "not dancing around in a tutu drawing Ariel and the Magic Kingdom. And apparently he's a tree-hugger too," he chuckled, putting a hand out towards Maddie, in reference to her latest bit of information.

I stared at him, speechless and wide-eyed.

"Not that there's anything wrong with any of that," he added quickly, seeing my shocked expression. "I'm just sayin'."

"I…really…don't…think…Edward's…a…fairy." It was the first time I'd acknowledged Maddie's little friend since we'd been here. But there was no way I could _not_ stand up for him on this one.

Jake just shrugged and went back to his nervous grass-pulling.

"Never mind that," Jake murmured. I could tell by the way he was acting that he had more to say. "My point is I don't see why you have to leave at all." His eyes came back up to me, dark and warm and anxious, and in them I could see that nothing had changed since I'd left a few months ago.

"Jake, I-"

He cut me off. "Bella, I hate the thought of you and Maddie out there by yourselves. There are so many assholes in this world. Especially in cities like New York. Guys who'll try to use you, guys who'll think that just because you come from a small town-"

This time I cut him off. "Yeah, yeah, I know Jake. We already went through this when I left before, remember? You taught me well, Sensei. I can take care of myself and Maddie," I joked.

He pursed his lips, unconvinced. "I'm not just talking about taking care of yourself physically." He swallowed nervously. "Guys in big cities like that, with their flashy cars and smooth talking" – he shook his head – "I just don't want to see you fall for anyone's bullshit."

"You think I'd fall for someone just for his cars, or for his sweet words?"

He threw himself back on the grass, frustrated. "I'm not saying that. You're just so…trusting sometimes Bella."

I threw myself back too, landing a few inches from Jake. We both looked up at the clouds looming over us. "Jake, that Bella? That trusting Bella? She's gone." I turned to face him. "You of all people should know that, after everything that's happened."

My mind went back to Edward, and for a split second, I doubted myself.

Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy. What had I said to myself all those weeks ago, the first time I'd lay eyes on Edward? That I'd never be stupid enough to go for someone like him. Meanwhile, what had I done just a few days ago? I'd agreed to something - I still wasn't sure _exactly what -_ but I was pretty sure I'd agreed to something beyond friendship with him. And then at the airport, _I'd_ kissed him. _I'd_ leaned in, unable to hold back any longer, and placed my lips on his. God, just the thought of it sent a chill up my spine, making me shiver.

"You cold?" Jake asked, watching me curiously.

I cleared my throat. "No, I'm fine."

Jake nodded and looked back up at the darkening sky. His hand searched at his side, whether for more grass or my hand, I wasn't sure. I sat up, facing him.

"Hey," I said, putting my hand gently over his to still his nervous movements. "You don't have to worry Jake. Maddie and I will be fine. And…and we've made some good friends in New York, both of us. Sue, and Alice and Rose-"

"And Edwood," Jake chimed in, smiling.

I forced a smile. "Yes, and Edward."

All of a sudden, Jake sat up. He turned our hands over, intertwining our fingers, and his eyes met mine with an intensity that made me nervous. "What I'm trying to say Bella, is that I don't want you to go. Stay. Please. With me."

My heart sank. We'd avoided this scene for days, and I'd almost hoped I'd be able to leave without it happening at all.

"Jake, you're my oldest and dearest friend. Please, don't do this." I tried to pull my hand away, but he held on to it tightly.

"Bella," he began, his voice laced with desperation, "I know you don't feel the same for me as I do for you. I'm not stupid. But…but you tried that crazy love thing with Paul. It didn't work. Maybe…maybe sometimes real relationships need to be built more on trust, and caring and faith, then on a sick, masochistic love that'll just destroy you."

I looked down, unable to keep looking in his dark eyes. Slowly, I pulled my hand away, and thankfully this time he let me.

"You'd be happy with that Jake? Being with me even though you know your feelings are so different from mine. You'd settle like that?"

"It wouldn't be settling," he asserted. "Being with you could never be settling."

"But it would be," I insisted, forcing myself to look back up at him.

He stared at me, long and hard, searching desperately for something in my eyes. "Bella, I l-"

"Don't Jake," I said quickly, "Please don't."

He inhaled angrily, glowering at me, and then quickly stood and stormed away, stopping in front of a large tree and kicking it.

I drew in a deep breath and followed, stopping just behind him. I reached up high to put a hand on his shoulder. He felt stiff, tense.

"Jake. You don't…love me. Not the ways you think you do."

He snorted angrily, keeping his back to me.

"Do you want to know how I know?" I asked him.

He didn't answer.

"If you really loved me, you wouldn't be willing to settle." He refused to say anything or face me.

"If you really loved me," I continued, swallowing hard, "it would be all or nothing. No in-between."

Finally, he turned towards me, but kept his eyes focused beyond; I could still see the heartache in them, and the resigned set of his face.

"Jake, someday the right one _will_ come along." He rolled his eyes.

"And then you'll be glad you remained celibate for so long." I smiled and followed his eyes, hoping to force at least a small smile from him.

His eyes finally met mine. "Who says I've been celibate?" His tone was serious, but I could see the corners of his mouth twitching.

"Wo-hoe!" I chuckled, feigning indignation. "And so the true Jake rears his ugly head!"

"Yeah, well," he said, one corner of his mouth losing the fight and rising up, "A guy can only wait so long."

I chuckled, but my mind suddenly turned to another guy, three thousand miles away, and for a split second I wondered how long he'd be willing to wait.

While Jake joined Maddie and my dad for some last minute fishing before it was time to leave, I took advantage of the time alone to sneak a call to Edward.

While the phone rang, I mulled over my conversation with Jake. What _was_ I doing?

'_You can be so trusting,'_ Jake had said. Was I really being stupid in allowing myself to trust Edward? Edward, of all people? Of all the millions of men I could've met in New York, I had to fall for the city's biggest renowned player. _What was I doing?_

But before I could answer my own question, he picked up the phone, and just like that, all my doubts vanished. Because how could he possibly fake the joy, the relief, the tenderness I heard in his voice every time I spoke to him?

I didn't tell him what had happened this afternoon. That Jenks hadn't been able to get Paul and his lawyer to agree to file the petition to relinquish Paul's paternal rights. There was no point. I'd tell him when I was back in New York. Our conversations this week had been laced with so much stress, so much anxiety, I wanted to have at least one stress-free talk with him. And when he started telling me about all the different things he wanted now, someone to watch the sun go down with, someone to share his chocolate obsession with – which frankly, I'd be perfect at – and then, oh God, then when he said he wanted to kiss me again so badly it hurt, the heat that radiated from me could've set the forest on fire. That burn in his voice, that intensity, that couldn't possibly be faked. Could it?

Another thing I didn't tell him, that I'd be coming home tomorrow after all. I was going to, frankly I'd been hoping he'd offer to pick Maddie and me up from the airport. For once, I wouldn't have put up a fight. I still wasn't comfortable riding in a cab that late at night with Maddie. And honestly, I was anxious to see him. But he'd already made plans, and Esme wanted him to go to that auction. So I said nothing, because I knew Edward well enough by now to know that had I told him, he would've come pick me up.

So later that night, after Jake had gone home, and Maddie was in bed, and my dad was watching his game, I quickly called Alice.

I'd called Alice earlier, after I'd spoken to Edward this morning, just to let her know how everything had gone in court. So she was a bit surprised to hear from me again twice in one day. She knew me well enough to know I wasn't the hours-on-the-phone-with-your-girlfriends-type.

"Alice," I began, after a few minutes of conversation, "I'm actually calling for a favor." I cringed. I didn't like asking for favors.

"Oh-my-God-really?" Alice gushed excitedly. "You want me to do you a favor?" She squealed. I mean, actually squealed in delight. "Sure! Anything! You name it! What? What? What?"

I had to pull the phone away from my ear for a few seconds. "I'm coming home tomorrow," I began.

"You are?" Another squeal. "Oh-my-God-Edward's-gonna-be-so-happy! Did you tell him yet? What time? What time are you gonna be home?"

"Well, I haven't really told him." I told her what he'd said about the charity auction, and that I didn't want him to change his plans for me.

"But Bella," Alice began, "I'm sure he'd much rather pick you up than go to that thing."

"I just- I'd really rather he not change his plans for me. So make sure he doesn't find out. I'd hate for him to miss the auction just to come pick me up."

Alice remained quiet for a while. "So you want me to pick you up?" she asked more cheerfully.

"If you don't mind…"

"Of course not, silly!" she laughed. "Just give me the flight info and I'll be there when you guys land."

The next day at the airport, my dad, Jake, Maddie and I said our goodbye's once again. I hugged my dad and made him promise to call me more, and he made me promise I'd be back for Thanksgiving next month. Then he pulled away quickly and went to say goodbye to his granddaughter.

Jake hugged me, hard. Burying his head into my hair, he whispered intently, "If you change your mind Bella, I'm here. Don't ever forget that."

I pulled away slowly and when I looked at him, I hoped he could see in my expression that I wouldn't change my mind.

He smiled sadly and turned to Maddie, his expression shifting. "Remember Mad girl Maddie," he said with a grin, "You let Uncle Jake know if anyone messes with you over there."

Maddie wrinkled her little brow. "That's what Edwood tells me. He says no one better mess with the little pwincess!" she gleamed.

Jake looked at her with more than a little confusion, finally leaning into me and whispering, "Little fairy's a tough little fucker after all, isn't he? What's he gonna do? Twirl anyone that messes with her to death?" he snickered, making a circular motion with his finger.

I bit my lip and turned to my dad. He was watching me curiously, his brown eyes dancing with amusement. He'd obviously heard Jake's comment, and from the look on his face, I was pretty sure he'd figured out from his many conversations with his granddaughter that 'Edwood' wasn't a ballet-dancing, twirling-five-year-old-fairy.

ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

Back at JFK, Alice greeted us outside security.

"Ally!" Maddie cried, running into her outstretched arms.

"Maddie baby!" Alice cried, in a voice almost as high as my daughters. I smiled watching them.

"I'm sorry we're so late," I said to Alice, "We were stuck on the tarmac in Seattle for over two hours."

Alice laughed. "Hey, it's alright," she assured me with a happy smile, taking one of the carry-ons from me so that I could carry Maddie, who was falling asleep. "You saved me from having to go to my uncle's charity auction. I hate going to those things. I'd rather just write him a check and be done with it. Emmett and Rose go every year 'cause they've got to win Rose's signed Yankee ball every year, and Edward usually goes to…" she trailed off suddenly, shaking her head as if she were fighting off an unwanted thought. "Anyway, he's going to be so thrilled you and Maddie are back! Have you called him?"

"No, not yet," I said, remembering I'd turned off my phone on the airplane because my battery was running low. Once we were in Alice's car and Maddie was safely buckled in the car seat Alice had borrowed from Sue, I pulled out my cell phone. I had a couple of missed calls.

"Edward called me," I murmured softly, unable to suppress a pleased smile.

Alice threw me a knowing glance. "Of course he did." She shook her head. "He's been in a daze all week. Hasn't been able to get you and Maddie off his brain," she chuckled.

I rolled my eyes, but the smile wouldn't leave my face, and I could feel my cheeks burning.

"So are you going to call him back?"

I bit my lip. "It's past midnight. Maybe I should just wait 'til tomorrow?"

"Don't be silly! You think he cares what time it is when it comes to you?"

Unable to deny that I was anxious to speak to him, I called. But his cell phone rang and rang, finally going to voice mail. Unsure of what to say, I hung up without leaving a message.

"What happened?" Alice asked, turning onto the Belt Parkway.

I shrugged, feeling a bit disappointed. "He must be sleeping already."

Alice frowned. "Here call his house. It's 646-"

"Alice, I'll just call him tomorrow morning."

Alice pouted, huffing and raising and lowering her shoulders in exasperation. "But I wanted to hear his reaction when he heard you were back!" she moaned. "I'll bet that's gonna be priceless!"

ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

The next morning I called Rosalie to let her know I'd be in the office.

"Bella, I was really happy to hear things went well in Washington," she said. "You stick it to that son-of-a-bitch ex of yours."

I chuckled weakly, unable to say anything else. After we hung up, I stared at the phone for a long time. It would make sense to call Edward, wouldn't it? I mean, after the kiss in the airport, and the things we'd said to each other over the phone over the past week, we were definitely beyond just co-worker territory, weren't we? And the way he sounded every time I called him, like he'd really been looking forward to my call...

Before I could second guess myself any further, I dialed his number, but like last night, it rang and rang and went to voice mail. I hung up, feeling just as frustrated as last night. I'd see him at work anyway, and we'd take it from there.

At work, James was the first to walk into my cubicle.

"Bella, I didn't know you'd be in today!" he exclaimed, taking a seat on my guest chair. I turned from my laptop, where I'd been trying to catch up on my emails.

James was a nice enough guy. He'd been very friendly to me since I'd started working here, much to Lauren's chagrin. Not that I thought she'd set her sights on him or anything; she just seemed to have a general problem with anyone who didn't obviously dislike me as much as she did.

I returned his laid back smile. "Yes, I'm back, just trying to catch up on some work this morning."

"Well it's good to have you back. You missed a great meeting last Wednesday. The Cartwrights loved your idea."

I felt myself blush. "Yes, I heard it went well."

"It definitely did," he agreed. "I'm not surprised though. You're obviously so much more than just a pretty face," he added intently.

I felt my blush grow. Was he flirting with me, or just being nice? Either way, I was beginning to feel uncomfortable.

"Well, I've got to get back to-"

"Bella, I wanted to ask you if you wanted to-"

Rosalie walked in just then, stopping us both mid-sentence.

"Ah Bella, you're in." She glanced at James.

"Well, I've got to be getting back to work," James said quickly, standing up. "Bella, I'll talk to you later."

I smiled tightly. "See you later James."

We both watched him leave. Rosalie turned back to me. She smiled warmly, but she seemed to have something on her mind. "Can we go to my office for a minute?"

"Sure."

Back at her office, Rosalie closed her door carefully. When she sat down, she took the seat next to me instead of behind her desk.

"Everything okay then?" she asked. I could see genuine concern in her sky blue eyes.

"For the most part, yes," I replied honestly. I hadn't told anyone yet, not even Alice last night, what had happened with Paul.

She met my eyes. "Bella, I know I don't always show it, but I hope you know that I'm here for you as more than just your supervisor. If you ever need to talk…"

I put my hand on top of hers. "Thanks Rose, I do know that." I thought of the delicate condition Rose seemed to find herself in lately. "And I hope you know that it goes the other way too. If you ever need to talk to me, about… anything… about… changes… questions," I cringed. I didn't know how to phrase it since she didn't seem ready to share with anyone what I'd only guessed because I'd been there once myself.

She smiled, with a wry expression that told me she knew exactly what I meant.

"Thanks Bella," she said "I'll remember that." She patted my hand and stood up, walking back to her desk. "Now enough with the 'Life…Unexpected' moment. Let's get back to work."

I chuckled quietly.

"The guys'll be down here any moment," she said, and my heart gave an involuntary leap. Edward would be here soon. I felt my palms get sweaty. "We wanted to talk to you about something that happened this morning."

Before I could make sense of her words, there were two quick rasps on her door and Emmett peaked in.

"May we?" he asked, and Rose nodded. In walked Emmett followed by Jasper. No Edward though. I frowned slightly but then composed my features.

"Hey Bella!" Emmett cried, flopping into the seat next to me that his wife had just vacated. Jasper took the seat next to him, smiling.

"How'd everything go? Do I need to go kick some ass down in Washington?" he asked with a playful scowl.

I half-chuckled. "No everything should be fine," I said.

"Good," he exclaimed. "'Cause I know nobody wants me to bring _this_ to their door," he exclaimed, flexing his biceps.

I couldn't help laughing out loud, and Emmett laughed right along with me.

"Settle down Twin Guns" Jasper chided. He turned to me with his gentle eyes. "Seriously Bella, Alice said everything worked out okay, right?" he asked. I fought back my emotions, because seriously, how had I gotten so lucky as to befriend this family?

"Yes, Jasper, everything worked out."

"Did you tell her?" Emmett asked Rosalie.

"No, I was waiting for you guys…hey, where's Edward?" Rosalie asked.

Emmett rolled his eyes and Jasper smirked. I got the feeling they were upset about something. But Emmett just answered with a tight, "He's not in yet."

Rose frowned. "Well, we can't wait for him. Let's just move forward." Emmett and Jasper nodded their agreement.

Rose turned back to me, all business now. "Bella, I'm going to make this short, because the Cartwrights want an answer right away." I bit my lip nervously and nodded for her to continue. She drew in a deep breath. "Wednesday's presentation went off marvelously. The Cartwright's loved your idea from start to finish, just as we knew they would. There was just one problem."

I tilted my head to the side and frowned. "They're unhappy with Lauren," she continued. "She's been slacking off on this account for a while now, and I guess her lackluster performance at the presentation on Wednesday was the last straw for them." She looked at me intently. "They want you to take over the entire account."

My eyes widened in shock. "But Rose, that's your account. And Lauren's been running their creams for a couple of years-"

Rose waved a hand in front of me. "That's all changing Bella. The account has outgrown Lauren, and I have no problem with handing the reins over to you" – she looked me in the eyes – "as long as you guarantee me you can handle it."

"I can handle it," I said quickly. The EverSoft Account! I couldn't believe it.

"But Rose," I said again, "This is your baby."

Rose gave me a knowing smile, one only I would recognize from the conversation we'd had before Emmett and Jasper walked in. "There'll be other babies."

"Alright then, it's settled," she said, changing to work mode once again and tapping her desk with both hands. "Bella, I'll speak to Lauren this morning letting her know of the changes, and then you and I should meet again, maybe in an hour or so, to discuss the steps we'll need to take."

She looked over at Emmett and Jasper. "Should we wait for Edward to call the Cartwrights back or what?"

Emmett smirked. "Jasper and I have already called him a couple of times. I think we should just go ahead without him for now. We can fill him in when he gets here." He looked upset again, which was strange for Emmett. Rosalie looked at him questioningly, but didn't say anything.

I got up to leave. "Alright then, I'll be back in an hour," I confirmed with Rosalie before stepping out.

"Okay Bella, thanks," she dismissed me distractedly. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her walk over to Emmett and Jasper. Jasper appeared to be showing her something, a newspaper or something, so I let myself out.

It was about a half hour later when Lauren walked into my cube, glowering.

"Congratulations Isabella Swan," she said sarcastically. "Only here a couple of months and you've managed to snag yourself one of the biggest accounts in this agency. I wonder how you pulled that off?" she said, staring up at the ceiling and tapping her chin with one finger.

"By working my ass off," I answered her. Yeah, there was definitely no love lost between Lauren and me.

She snorted. "Yes, I'm sure your ass had something to do with it."

I narrowed my eyes, something in my gut telling me there was more to her words than I was hearing. All of a sudden, here whole demeanor changed, and she smiled at me sweetly.

"Here are some of the files Rosalie asked me to hand over to you." She placed the file folders she was carrying on one corner of my desk and turned to leave, but before she'd taken more than a couple of steps, she turned back to me, and with a sugary smile and cold eyes, she placed a newspaper she'd been holding on top of the files.

"Oh and here's today's newspaper, in case you need to catch up with what's been going on in the city while you've been gone. I think you'll find it rather…educational." Her mouth turned up in a grin that seemed to mock me. She chuckled. "Happy reading Bella."

I sighed and turned back to my laptop. Lauren's weirdness was the last thing I had time for now. I had a lot of catching up, between the work I'd missed and now taking over the EverSoft Account. My day would be packed, but still, I couldn't help thinking of Edward.

Where had he been this morning? Why hadn't he shown up with Emmett and Jasper? And why hadn't he answered his phone again this morning? Anxious, I tapped my fingers on my keyboard, suddenly worried that he might be sick or something. Should I call him again? But if he was running late, he probably wouldn't have time to answer his phone. And he drove in; I didn't want him to get into an accident trying to answer his cell, especially with the way he drove. Anyway, after the whole Cartwright thing this morning, Emmett and Jasper would probably tell him I was back at work as soon as he got in. I'd wait a little longer.

I tried typing out a few more emails, catching up on messages I'd missed while I was gone, but then my eyes landed on the mountain of files Lauren had dropped on my desk. I'd be meeting with Rosalie again in a few minutes. Might as well start going through them so I could show Rosalie I was up for the task.

I reached for the top file, only to come up with the newspaper Lauren had left. Distractedly, I threw it to the side of my desk when a headline caught my attention.

**Eddie C. back to Old Games, Old Flames.**

My eyes drifted to the pictures below the headline. And for the first time in a very long while, I felt the all-too-familiar ache of betrayal stab me in the chest.

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**A/N: Still with me here? Don't worry, it'll get better soon. I promise. I won't make these two suffer apart much more. **

**Edward's POV back again next chapter. THINGS WILL IMPROVE!**

**Whether you hate me or love me right now, leave me reviews! Thanks!**


	14. Chapter 13 Thinking of the Right Words

**A/N: Next installment guys. Enjoy.**

**I've been updating pretty regularly lately because I'm as desperate as you guys are to see these two together already! But the story has to be told a certain way. No worries though, WE ARE ALMOST, ALMOST, ALMOST there. I mean, so, so close! (Maybe even next chappy?) Okay, okay. I can't give it away any more.**

**Thanks to my Beta Danna0724, for agreeing with me that the song rec below kicks arse! And for going through the trouble of looking up the link (which I was too lazy to do.) **

**All characters (except for my Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 13 – Thinking of the Right Words**

**Chapter Song – The Promise, by When in Rome** _(Please, please, please listen to this song while reading this chapter. It goes with it so perfectly. And it's an all-time classic, IMO. Trust me. Go to YouTube(dot)com and type in the following address, replacing the (dot) with a real dot, of course.)_

http:/www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=tOyyrB1wj04

**EPOV**

'_Hi. You've reached Isabella Swan at CCW Advertising. I'm sorry I can't take your call right now, but if you leave your name, number and a message, I'll get back to you shortly. Thanks.'_

"Bella, it's Edward again. Please call me when you're back at your desk. I really need to talk to you." I hesitated, lowering my voice; pleading. "Please Bella, just let me explain."

For the fifth time that morning I hung up the phone. Exhaling loudly, I threw myself back against my leather chair.

How the hell had this happened? Just when we were starting to get somewhere. Things were finally starting to look good. The hearing in Washington had been resolved in Bella's favor, the Cartwrights had loved the campaign, and Bella…Bella was finally coming around. If I closed my eyes, I could still feel the brush of her warm lips on mine…

And then I'd gone and fucked it all up.

Should I go back down to her cubicle? I couldn't wait outside her space forever. I'd waited fifteen minutes before, and she hadn't shown up. If I'd stayed any longer, people might've started talking, and while I didn't care what they thought, I was pretty sure that wouldn't have made Bella happy.

I lowered my head, pinching the bridge of my nose. That was part of the problem here, wasn't it? I still wasn't sure what parts of my life I needed to keep private, and what was fair game for the public. The dryness in my mouth reminded me of how royally I'd screwed up last night, and as I reached for my third water bottle of the morning, I made a mental promise to stay away from Tequila in any shape, way or form, and to stay away from any place or any person – namely Tanya – that would associate me with the old Edward, the one I was trying desperately to leave behind.

A knock on the door startled me, making my heart drop to my feet. The door opened slowly. Maybe…

Rosalie poked her head in. She spoke in a cool voice, staring at a point just beyond me. "Just wanted to let you know I spoke to Bella and we're back on track."

I nodded, once again feeling ashamed of my earlier outburst.

"At some point early next week we should probably all meet, decide what direction-"

"Rosalie, would you step inside please. I'd like to talk to you, if you don't mind."

Rose sucked in a breath. "Edward, I really don't have-"

"Please Rose."

She smirked and walked in slowly, closing the door behind her and refusing to meet my eyes.

"Please take a seat," I indicated, signaling towards one of the chairs.

"I'll stand, thanks."

I sighed. "Look Rose, I just wanted to…apologize, for before." She kept her eyes on the windows behind me, without any acknowledgement of my words. "I walked into your office this morning in a seriously bad mood, and I shouldn't have spoken to you the way I did. Emmett was right to get pissed off at me."

She rolled her eyes. "I can take care of myself."

"I know you can. I just wanted you to know that I'm really sorry, for how I acted and what I said to you. I was way out of line. You were…right, about a lot of things."

Finally, she turned her eyes to me, looking more disappointed than angry. She took me in for a long moment, and then pursed her lips. "How could you do that Edward? After how adamant you were last week about not wanting to jeopardize her career, and not wanting to play games with her. In one freaking morning you proved exactly what an ass-"

"Rose," I tried, although I knew how pointless it would be, "I wasn't trying to jeopardize her career. I was stupid, I know that, okay? I was stupid, and selfish, and a hypocrite. I know." I inhaled deeply, running my hand through my hair. "I know how badly I've screwed everything up."

Rose arched an eyebrow, searching my eyes for something. She finally narrowed her blue eyes and said, "You know, all that could be fixed, could be explained, but hooking up with Tanya again? Ugh! How stupid can you be?"

"Rose!" I hissed. "That wasn't what happened!"

"Pfft!" she said, turning to leave.

"Rose listen to me." She turned around slowly, the skepticism etched clearly on her face. "Rose you know me."

She lifted her eyebrows. "Exactly."

I exhaled. "Yes, I'm a jerk. I've done…stupid things over the past few years. But you've known me since college Rose. When have I ever denied anything I did?"

She stared at me.

"I may be a lot of things Rose, but a liar's not one of them. You know that."

Rose glared at me for a long time, still dubious. "You were practically doing her right in the back seat of that cab."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "No. Look, I had too much to drink last night. Tanya was being…insistent, and yeah, I probably got myself into the situation in the first place, but those pictures, they're lies. I was drunk, I stumbled, and I was just trying to get back up. That's all it was. Then she left in her cab, and I left in mine. That was the last I saw of her."

She studied me again. I could feel my palms getting sweaty under her scrutiny. Finally, she snorted and crossed her arms in front of her.

"Boy, you've really made a fine mess of things, haven't you?"

I rubbed my forehead with my fingers, still feeling the aftereffects of Jose. "Tell me about it. I've called her like five times already and she won't pick up my calls."

Rose gnawed on the inside of her lip. "Well she's probably really pissed off at you. Can you blame her?"

I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "No, I suppose not." I looked back up at Rose. I was sure the desperation was written clearly on my face. "What do I do Rose?" I begged.

She continued gnawing on the inside of her lip thoughtfully. After a long pause she answered, "You leave her alone and let her do her job."

I sighed. "Look, I know you need her to focus on the Cartwright account right now, but I need to speak to her."

She rolled her eyes and put her hand out, palm up. "I'm not saying that as her boss – although as her boss I do have to ask you to stop distracting her from her job – I'm saying it as her friend," her voice softened, "and as your sister-in-law."

She smiled hesitantly. "Look, Bella's had a difficult week. She just got back to work today and has tons of shit to catch up on, and now the Cartwright Account to deal with. Give her a break Edward. Let her catch her breath. Like I said, she's probably all sorts of pissed off at you right now anyway. Give her a chance to calm down, and then you know, this afternoon, when you're in the lobby, spying on her like a little pervert," her mouth twitched up into a sly grin, "maybe you can try talking to her then."

So as hard as it was, I took Rosalie's advice and forced myself to leave Bella alone for the day. I went on with the daily grind as much as I could, and at ten minutes to five that afternoon, I waited in the lobby, nervous and anxious. My palms felt sweaty, my friggin' heart felt as if were about to pop out of my chest, and my pulse raced wildly in my veins. Finally, at ten minutes after five, the elevator doors opened up and Bella walked out quickly, her eyes focused straight ahead as she made a direct bee line for the exit.

Bracing myself and all of a sudden forgetting my well-thought-out speech, I walked over to her.

Bella spotted me when I was only a few short feet away, and when she looked at me, something crossed her features, but just as I reached her, she stopped in her tracks and flashed me a wide grin.

"Oh hey Edward," she said pleasantly, no trace of irritation in her voice. "Sorry I didn't call you back today, but it's been hectic," she said with a chuckle. "Between everything I've missed all week, and now with the Cartwright account, I've barely had time to catch my breath."

I furrowed my brows, puzzled by her attitude. When I opened my mouth to say something, nothing came out.

She smiled at me again. "Looks like I missed a busy week in the office. The Cartwright meeting, Rose says the folks at Springtime Organix are looking to make some changes, it's going to take me all weekend to catch up." She patted her briefcase.

"Um, Bella, I wanted to talk to you about, well you know, this morning in Rosalie's office-"

"Oh. No worries Edward." She waved a hand dismissively, still smiling. "I realize different heads are going to have different opinions. I'll just, you know, try my best and hopefully the results will speak for themselves."

My brows moved closer together. I was growing more and more confused by her happy-go-lucky attitude. "What? No Bella. That's not what- Look I know you saw-"

She glanced down at her watch and then looked back up at me. "Edward, can we defer this conversation for Monday? I know Rose wants us all to get together early next week to devise a new plan for the entire EverSoft account, and I promise I'll be working hard on it this weekend, but right now I really do have to get home. My daughter and I got in late last night and I really have to pick her up from the sitter. She's probably exhausted."

"You mean Maddie and Sue."

"Excuse me?" she asked.

"You mean you have to pick up Maddie from Sue's house."

She hesitated. "Yes. That's what I said. My daughter, from her sitter's house." She said the words slowly, and I got the distinct feeling that it meant something.

My heart rate accelerated and the frown deepened. "You can call them by their names Bella. I know who you're talking about."

She swallowed thickly, but didn't answer.

"Bella," I implored in a low whisper, "let me take you home. We can talk-"

She smiled again, but instead of calming me, it was unnerving. It was a phony smile; empty, lacking any warmth whatsoever. I felt as if my heart would explode in my chest.

"Thanks Edward, but that's really not necessary. I've become very comfortable with the city's subway system. But thanks again for the offer. I really appreciate it. You have yourself a good weekend and I'll see you Monday," she finished, before turning and walking away swiftly.

I watched her walk away, my mouth hanging wide open while I wondered what had just happened. This hadn't gone the way I expected at all. I'd expected anger, maybe some accusations, but definitely not The Joker incarnate.

"Bella! Bella wait!" I called out, but she kept walking. I followed and reached her right outside the revolving doors.

"Bella please!" I whispered intently, blocking her way.

For a split second she glared at me, and strangely enough, I felt relieved. But her expression quickly shifted, and all that was there was an impatient smile.

"Edward I'm sorry, but I really have to go. If I miss the 5:23 D train then I'll miss the 5:30 F out of Rockefeller and-"

"What's going on Bella? Why are you acting so strange?"

She shrugged and shook her head. "Nothing's going on. I just need to get home to my daughter-"

"Why do you keep calling her your daughter?"

She frowned, the infernal smile still in place. "Because that's what she is."

"You just call her Maddie when you talk to me."

She pursed her lips. "My daughter Madisen had a long day yesterday, and now I need to get her home. So if you'll excuse me Edward, I really have to go." She moved past me again.

I stepped in front of her. "Bella."

For the first time since this morning, she met my eyes, and what I saw in them made me cringe. Gone were the warm chocolate eyes that haunted my dreams. These new eyes were cold, impassive; completely foreign to me. And the way she looked at me sent a cold shiver down my spine; like a stranger, the way you'd look at a transient on the subway, guarded – ready to run the other way with one false move.

And just like that, I knew I could keep Bella out here all evening and it wouldn't change a thing. Whatever we'd started before she left for Washington was gone.

I understood now what she was doing. Why Maddie was no longer Maddie, why everything, even the name of the sitter I'd never met but had heard so much of, was being taken away. She was distancing herself from me, taking us back to that first day when she was just the new employee, and I was the boss who'd been fucking around in the conference room.

All the hope, all the expectations and desires that had been building up over the last few days slipped away. With my energy suddenly depleted, I raised my hand slowly and stuck out the small Barney's bag I'd been holding, the one that had been waiting to be delivered on a corner of my desk for over a week now.

"Can you please give this to…Maddie for me? They're dance tights. She ripped her old ones, so I bought her a few new pairs. I promised I'd…get them to her."

Once again, I thought I saw something cross her features, but it was quickly gone and replaced with that maddening smile again. She reached out and gingerly took the bag.

"That's really nice of you Edward. Thank you. And my daughter thanks you too."

I nodded but couldn't get myself to say anything.

"Well, have a good weekend," she repeated and walked away. This time, I didn't try to stop her.

I was exhausted as all hell after my evening jog that night. I'd run the loop around the lake over and over again, trying to clear my head. Trying to reconcile the Bella I'd come to know over the past few weeks with the one I'd talked to this afternoon, cringing every time I compared the warm, affectionate smiles she'd given me over the last few weeks to the cool, empty ones she'd given me today. And her eyes…shit, I couldn't even think of her eyes. Damn it, I'd screwed up. I'd let myself get into a situation last night that in all honesty probably could've been avoided, and then this morning…well, I'd let my jealousy get the best of me. But now she wouldn't even hear me out. How the hell was I going to fix this?

I slept like shit that night. Alternating between dreams where Maddie was lost in a train station - Grand Central? - and every time I saw her she'd turn a corner and disappear. Then a dream where I'd be jogging through Central Park and come across Bella, sitting on one of the concrete benches lining the trail. Just as I'd approach her, she'd look up and give me the smile she'd given me today. And then she'd suddenly turn into Tanya. Then I'd wake up gasping and fall back asleep only to have the same dreams over and over again; an endless loop of my own personal hell.

I spent all of Saturday indoors, sweating out my aggravation on the treadmill, on the bench press, and ignoring everyone's calls, especially Alice's. Friday afternoon, she'd left me a message full of so many expletives I'd had to go online to look some of them up. I wondered if Jasper knew the kind of mouth he was marrying. Whatever. I didn't want to speak to anyone. Well, only one person, and _she_ wasn't calling me. Not anymore.

That night, when Winston Jewelers delivered the sapphire necklace and earrings I'd won at the auction, I almost flushed them down the toilet. At the last second, I pictured again how beautiful they'd look against Bella's creamy white skin, and how she'd smile up at me when I gave them to her; a genuine smile, full of emotion, and her eyes would sparkle as brightly as the diamonds encrusted in the platinum chain. Sighing, I deposited the black velvet box in one of my kitchen drawers.

Sunday morning I lay in bed, trying to figure out how I was going to get through the next day if I had to look at that maddening smile on Bella's face again, when I got a call from Louie the doorman downstairs.

"Mr. Cullen, Dr. Cullen's here to see you."

I rolled my eyes. My father hadn't visited me by himself in years. He'd probably seen the paper last Friday. This was gonna be interesting.

"Thanks Louie, send him up," I said. Taking a deep breath, I went over to my closet and threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and quickly brushed my teeth before the doorbell rang.

"Edward," my dad greeted me when I opened the door.

"Hey dad," I responded carefully. "What brings you over here?"

He followed me into the kitchen. "Oh, I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by and say hi."

I smirked before turning to him. In the neighborhood my ass. "Want something to eat?" I asked, taking out some eggs from the fridge.

"You haven't eaten yet?" he asked.

"Nope," I said, pulling out a bowl and the egg beater.

"Well," he said slowly, "why don't you and I go uptown to Havana Central for brunch? I haven't been there in a while." He patted his flat stomach. "I could really go for a Cuban Sandwich."

Thirty minutes later, we were seated in the middle of a noisy restaurant eating the best Cuban brunch the city had to offer. My father's eyes grew wide when his huge Cuban pressed sandwich was placed before him, and me, well, I wasn't one to talk; the drool practically ran down the side of my mouth at the sight of my eggs with chorizo and a side of queso frito and pressed Cuban bread. Friggin' delicious. It was almost enough to get my mind off…well, no it wasn't that good.

"How is it?" my father asked, taking another bite from his sandwich.

"Un-friggin-believable," I managed to say while shoveling another forkful of the eggs into my mouth.

"Good, good. I'm glad you're enjoying it," Carlisle said. "You looked like you needed a distraction this morning."

I took another bite, smaller this time, and chewed it slowly, carefully watching Carlisle. I put my fork down.

"So I take it you saw the papers Friday?"

He nodded slowly, keeping his eyes on me.

I chewed off a piece of my bread, swallowing it whole. After a couple of minutes I asked, "Isn't this the part where you chew me out and tell me how disappointed you are in me?"

"Should I be?"

"Well, you read the article. You saw the pictures."

"Yes. But I'm waiting to hear what you have to say about it."

"Since when do you want to hear what I have to say about it?"

He put his sandwich down, his expression calm as usual, but with an emotion I'd never seen before. "Since I'm trying Edward. Since I see _you_ trying."

I didn't answer.

"Was the article true? Were those pictures accurate?"

I met his eyes. "No."

I waited, knowing what would come next; the accusations; the disbelief.

"Okay," he finally said.

I jerked my head back in surprise. "Okay?" I repeated.

"What else do you want me to say?"

"Nothing! I mean…just…this is…different."

"Yes, well. A lot of things are different lately."

I nodded slowly, unable to think of anything else to say. We ate our food in silence for a while.

"Were you able to…explain things to Bella?"

The anxiety, the disappointment, the hurt all came crashing to the forefront. I threw the fork down on my plate and ran my hand through my hair. Before I could reign myself in, the words poured out in a gush.

"She wouldn't listen dad. She wouldn't even let me explain. And the thing is, she wasn't even upset, or disappointed or completely pissed off. She didn't curse me out, or anything. I would've preferred _that_. _Anything_ would've been better than they way she did act. All detached. Like I was nothing more than Edward Cullen, her boss. Like we hadn't been so close to…" I let out a huge sigh. "Like there was never anything there."

"She's upset," my dad said, putting his beloved sandwich aside.

"That's just the thing dad. She's not. She's just completely distanced herself from me. And Maddie," – a sharp pang stabbed at my chest and I pushed my plate away angrily – I was done – "I don't even know if she'll let me see Maddie again."

"Bella doesn't seem like the vindictive type to me Edward."

"You're right. She's not. I know she's not. It's just" – I put my elbows on the table and cradled my head in them, "I just don't know what's going on anymore. I have no idea what to do."

My father was silent for a while. I sat there with my head in my hands, listening to the clattering of dishes and glasses; utensils scraping against empty plates, loud voices laughing with friends and family; the distinct beat of Cuban rhythms blaring through the sound system. God I missed Bella, and she'd never even been mine.

"Give her some time Edward," Carlisle finally said.

"Time for what?" I moaned; my head still cradled in my hands. "Time for her to distance herself even more? At this rate, by next week she'll be calling me Mr. Cullen."

Carlisle chuckled once, wearing a bemused smile. I glared up at him, unable to see the humor in the situation. Leaning in he said,

"Son, you have to understand, women work very differently from men. I won't claim to understand them one bit, regardless of how long your mother and I have been married. But one thing I have learned, is that they process information very differently from us. Whereas we as men need an instant resolution to our problems, women like to take their time, to consult their feelings for days on end, to ponder a problem from hundreds of different angles. And when something upsets them, they don't look for a quick fix or an easy resolution. As a matter of fact," he leaned in further and lowered his voice, as if he were letting me in on an important secret, "the right answer for them is usually the last thing you would've thought of yourself."

I groaned, not feeling the least bit encouraged by his words.

Carlisle chuckled again. "Give her time Edward." He looked down at his plate longingly. "It's sort of like this Cuban Sandwich here." I gave him a puzzled look. "You put the pork and ham in, the pickles, Swiss and mayo, and at that point, it looks mouth-watering, but it's not ready. It has to go under the press. And if you take it out before time, it won't be toasted properly, and it won't taste right."

I was sure my expression let him know how crazy I thought he was. He smirked.

"What it all boils down to is this. You can't rush a good woman, but they're definitely worth the extra work. And Edward, Bella is a good woman."

I nodded. "I know that dad."

As we walked along the West End by the Hudson, back to my father's car, a flash caught my eye and I looked up to see a guy with a camera snapping our picture. Scowling, I growled and flipped him off with both hands. He turned and walked swiftly away.

"What was that for?" my father asked as we reached his car.

"God-damn paparazzi. Won't friggin' leave me alone," I scowled.

We climbed into the car. "Well, they'll never leave you alone if you keep acting like that."

"How the hell should I act? Should I strike a pose? Give them my daily itinerary?"

Carlisle eased the car down West End Avenue, along the dark brick mansions and nineteenth century townhouses lining the thoroughfare.

"Edward," he said, as he turned onto Broadway, "You have to treat the paparazzi as you would a bully."

"You mean beat the shit out of them?"

"No. I mean ignore them."

I smirked. "Uhm, dad, you can't ignore bullies."

"You know what I mean. Just stop giving them reasons to snap pictures of you. Eventually they'll grow bored of you and move on."

I nodded, considering his words. "So what you're saying is that people who get bullied ask for it?"

"What? No! I didn't say that!"

"Yes. You did. You said stop giving them reasons to snap pictures of you. In other words, implying that those that get bullied give the bully reason to do so."

He rolled his eyes. "I was talking about the paparazzi."

"But you were comparing the paparazzi to bullies."

"Will you forget about the bullies?"

"Sure, but you brought them up."

He gripped the wheel tighter and gave me an exasperated side-long glance. "Ignore the friggin' paparazzi," he gritted through his teeth. I held in a chuckle, totally enjoying watching him get flustered. "Don't smile at them," he continued. "Don't scowl, don't flip them the bird, don't perform a little song and dance for them. Eventually they'll get tired of you and move on to more exciting stories."

When he dropped me off in front of my building, I said bye and got out of the car, but before walking away, I leaned into the car to look at him.

"Hey dad? Thanks. You know, not just for brunch, but…well…this was…different."

"I know Edward. You're welcome."

Monday morning I walked into the office repeating my father's words to myself. _'Give her time, give her time, give her time'_ I chanted as I made my way out of the elevator. I'd try it my father's way for a bit, and if that didn't work, well, there was always groveling on my knees. I cringed.

Unfortunately, as soon as I saw her in the conference room later on that morning – where we were meeting with Rosalie, Emmet and Jasper to figure out our new direction with her as the lead of the EverSoft Account – my new resolve almost melted. For two reasons. One, she'd grown even more beautiful over the weekend, if that were possible. Her skin was as creamy as ever, but her cheeks were flushed a tempting pink, and her brown eyes were darker and more mysterious than ever. And the dark pencil skirt she wore with a dark blue blouse absolutely killed me. Two, she greeted me with the same maddening smile she'd given me Friday afternoon. The one that said, 'Good morning Mr. Cullen, you are my boss and co-worker and nothing else.' _'Give her time,'_ I repeated to myself, smiling back at her as she took a seat as far away from me as possible.

All this I could've dealt with. I could've gritted my teeth and put up with for a week, maybe two, until she processed whatever it was women were supposed to process and looked at the situation from however many thousands of angles women supposedly examined.

But the next afternoon, as I was walking through the lobby, going to get some lunch, I spotted her in the lunchtime crowd ahead of me, fighting her way through the eager horde anxious to make their way out of the building for a few minutes of midtown diversions. Without any conscious thought, my legs carried me over until I'd fallen in step with her.

And though I was sure she hadn't seen me approaching, her head suddenly whipped around to face me, and she took me in, momentarily startled.

I cleared my throat. "Hey Bella. Going to lunch?"

The surprise vanished from her face, and was replaced with the cool and friendly mask she wore with me now. "Oh, hey Edward. Yes, I'm just running out for a bite to eat."

And although I'd meant to heed my father's advice, when she was this near me - even if there was no visible warmth in her face - I could feel the heat radiating off of her; the electric pull between us that her chemistry couldn't deny, as much as the rest of her tried to. And I was as helpless against it as I'd been that day in the airport, when _both_ her chemistry and her lips had told me she felt for me at least close to what I felt for her.

So I said, "You want to grab a sandwich or something? Or run into Starbucks for some hot chocolate? There's this deli around the corner that-"

"Actually, I'm taking her to the pizzeria on 59th and Broadway, where they make the best chicken slices in the city," came a voice from the other side of her. As if in slow-motion, I forced my eyes to leave her face, where they landed on James, who was watching me with a half-smile, equal parts triumph and warning.

Mother. Fucker.

My vision blurred for a moment, and my hands fisted at my sides. Hell Fucking No. This. Was. Not. Happening.

"Want us to bring you back a slice later?" he asked cheerfully. Male translation: Don't even fucking think of coming along.

No, I wasn't coming. I knew myself well enough to know that if I did, James would end up in fifty pieces and stuffed into one of those brick ovens.

I shook my head, unable to utter any words. I looked back at Bella as we walked out of the building, but there was nothing there. No apology. No discomfort. No 'that's what you get for screwing around with me' look. Just that god-forsaken, expressionless smile.

"Enjoy your lunch," I said, and walked away.

And just like that, all my father's good advice went out the window.

I waited for her in the lobby at the end of the day. When she stepped out of the elevator, her eyes immediately moved up to me, as if she could feel me waiting there for her. And even though her mouth immediately turned up in that smile, for a split-second, before she'd been able to erase it, I thought I'd seen something in her eyes. Longing. Sadness. Hurt.

"Edward, thanks for your suggestions at yesterday's meeting. I think you're right. Now is the time to strike at the Cartwrights will all our new ideas. They seem to be open for anything at the moment. I was thinking that when I meet with them Friday morning, I'll suggest we-"

All business, right off the bat.

"Bella," I cut her off gently, keeping pace with her brisk walk. "Tomorrow's Wednesday. What time do you want to leave to pick up Maddie for dance?"

I wasn't stupid. I more or less knew not to expect the response I'd been hoping for. But after seeing her with James today – God, it fucking killed me - I couldn't help myself.

She stopped in her tracks and turned to me, her brows turned down at what I could only guess was shock at my nerve. "Edward, I spoke to Rosalie the other day. She's agreed to let me leave early on Wednesdays as long as I come in earlier and work through my lunch." She lifted her hand and hesitantly rested it on my arm. A thousand goose bumps rose on my flesh, and I could've sworn I heard a small gasp escape her lips. God, she had to have felt that. I couldn't be the only one feeling that.

"Thanks for everything," she said coolly. "But you don't need to drive me home on Wednesdays anymore."

"Bella, why are you doing this? Look, I know I messed up, but if you'll just let me explain-"

"I've got to go Edward. I'll see you tomorrow," she said before turning and quickly walking away.

The nightmare where I couldn't reach Maddie, where every time I almost had her in my grasp, she'd disappear around another corner, came again that night. When I woke up the next morning, I had a new mission. I missed seeing Maddie as much as I missed seeing the real Bella. She wasn't vindictive, my father and I had agreed, but what would she say?

Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to ask her. Between my own meetings and schedule, I didn't get a chance to speak to Bella that day at the office. So just to be on the safe side, I showed up at Alice's dance studio a half hour early, so that I could speak to Bella before class started and give her the chance to curse me out if she felt the need, without having to interrupt Maddie's lessons.

The down side to this plan was facing Alice, whom I'd been studiously avoiding for days. She, unlike Bella, had no problems with letting me know in no uncertain terms what a prick she thought I was, as evidenced by the many nasty messages she'd left on my answering machine in the past few days.

So stepping into her studio, I braced myself for Alice's wrath, but when I neared her office, I was surprised to find not only her, with the predictable scowl on her face, but also curiously, a pair of warm brown eyes that I hadn't been expecting just yet.

"Edwood!" Maddie cried, jumping up from behind the desk where she'd been sitting on Alice's lap, coloring. She jumped into my arms, like she usually did. And it felt so good to hold her again, to feel her little arms wrapped tightly around my neck. To know that at least one of my brown-eyed beauties wasn't pretending I was a stranger.

"Hey princess. What are you doing here so early?" I asked, smoothing away a stray lock of hair as she pulled away to look at me. The joy in her soft little face was almost enough to do away with the crappy week I'd been having.

"Ally picked me up from Sue's house today 'cause mommy had to go somewheuh. Edwood you came! You came to see me! I asked mommy and Ally if you wuh coming to see me today, but they said they didn't know. But I knew you'd come! You always come see me dance. I told Uncoe Jake you come to dance with me, and he said you must look cute in your getup, and I said I like your getup." She scrunched up her eyebrows. "Edwood, what's a getup?" she asked, but continued before I could think of an answer. "Look Edwood, I'm wearing the tights you got me! Mommy gave them to me and I was sad because I thought you were gonna bring them. But you're heuh now! Are you gonna stay with me? Because mommy's not heuh. She's with huh fwend. Are you staying?" she asked hopefully.

"Of course I'm staying," I assured her, stroking her hair. "Don't I always?"

She grinned widely, showing me all her perfect little white teeth. "Yay! And then we'll have pizza aftuh, like we always do?"

"Pepperoni for me, and plain for you," I reminded her, tapping her nose gently with my finger.

She giggled excitedly. "Maybe mommy will be back by then, and then you can shauh with huh." She looked away thoughtfully. "But Ally said mommy might eat with huh fwend, so you might have to eat your peppuhwoni by yourself."

I looked up at Alice. She was watching me with a smirk on her face.

I turned my attention back to Maddie. "Hey princess, why don't you go color on the desk for a few minutes? I'm just going to take Ally over by the window for a second to show her something okay?"

"Ooh, can I come see too? What is it?" she asked, bouncing up and down.

"How about I show you in a few minutes? Let me show Ally first. You know how impatient she can be."

Alice rolled her eyes. I glowered at her. Our discussion was definitely going to get heated on both sides.

"What's impayshin?"

"It means you're a traitorous witch," I mumbled in a low voice, glaring menacingly at my sister.

Alice narrowed her eyes at me but said nothing in front of Maddie.

"A what?" Maddie repeated.

I looked down at her and smiled. "It means she can't wait, so I'll show her first and then since you're such a good girl, I'll show you next. Okay?"

"Okay," she agreed happily, and skipped back to Alice's desk to take up her crayons.

Alice, smirk still in place, sauntered slowly out of the office, glaring at me the whole way. I followed her to the studio windows.

"Where's Bella?"

She continued glaring; no answer.

I exhaled loudly. "Look, I know you're pissed off at me right now. But I need to know where Bella is."

"What the hell do you care where Bella is?" she hissed. She took a deep breath and paused. "Edward, I'll admit at first I was your biggest cheerleader here, but after the shit you pulled last week, I think you should just leave her alone. Trust me, the last thing she needs in her life is someone sneaking around and playing stupid games-"

I raised my hands to my head, fisting my hair. "I wasn't playing games or sneaking around!" I whisper-yelled. Thankfully, it was still early, and none of the kids for Alice's next class had arrived yet.

"Alice listen to me. That article was total bullshit. Those pictures of me and Tanya…that's not how things went down. I wasn't fucking around with Tanya. I didn't go home with her."

Alice kept glaring at me, her miniature hands placed angrily on her tiny waist.

"Gah!" I growled. "I'm so sick and tired of explaining this shit to everyone except the one person who needs to hear it!"

"So you're telling me nothing happened with Tanya that night?" she asked.

"Yes. That is exactly what I'm telling you. And that's what I want to tell Bella, except she won't listen."

Alice gave me the evil eye for a while longer, before sighing dramatically and shaking her head.

"How many times did I warn you something like this would happen? Huh? How many times did I tell you to get the damn paparazzi and that skanky hoe Tanya under control? Hmm? But nooo. You're Edward Freakin' Cullen, the Paparazzi's Golden Boy. The Teflon of the Tabloids. Nothing sticks to you, right? _'They can print whatever they want'_ –she quoted me in a mocking tone- _'Doesn't bother me.'_

"Alright Alice, I get it!" I said through gritted teeth. "What do you want to hear? That you were right, as usual? Fine, you were abso-freakin'-lutely right! Happy now? I'll write you up a whole god-damned market proposal, fifty pages double-sided, on how right you were. _Just tell me where the hell Bella is!_"

She studied me for a long while, her mouth drawn in a tight line, before finally answering.

"She's on a date."

"What?"

She sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. "Did I stutter? She. Is. On. A. Date. You know, getting to know each other over dinner and drinks? Making eyes at each other over the table, 'accidentally'" – she made air quotes - "rubbing up against each other under the table?"

I felt the bile rise up in my throat. I was going to be sick. The only good thing about that was that I'd probably be sick all over Alice. The bad thing was that Maddie would probably see. But my little sister wasn't done.

"Oh don't worry about it Edward. I'm sure nothing like that'll happen on Bella's little date. She's not like the trick-turning skanks you're used to hooking up with." She tapped a finger on her chin thoughtfully. "Hmm…although…Bella has been celibate for quite a while. She may be due for some sexy-times, if you know what I mean," she winked at me with a crooked grin. "Can't really blame her; she is after all, a beautiful, single woman. And I gotta say, although he may not be as charming or quite the ladies man you are, James Smyth isn't half-bad."

My face contorted in pain. Anger. Confusion. All rolled into one.

Bella was on a date. _My_ Bella was on a date. With James Fucking Smyth.

How the hell had we gone from kissing just a few days ago, to her being on a date with someone else?

_My _Bella was on a date.

"Where'd they go?" I half-hissed, half-growled, glaring menacingly at Alice.

"I don't know," she snorted indignantly. "And even if I did, I wouldn't tell you."

There were ways of making Alice talk. I hadn't employed them in a good twenty years, but now seemed like as good a time as any to bring them back into service. I stalked closer to her.

"Bring it big brother!" she sneered, locking her munchkin legs in place and bringing her peewee fists in front of her.

"You traitorous little-"

"Ally, Edwood, are you guys fighting?" Maddie stood quietly a few feet away from us, her little brows turned down in confusion.

"No! No, princess," I assured her quickly, turning to shoot Alice one last glare before hurrying over to Maddie and kneeling down in front of her. "Ally was just showing me all the ugly faces she can make for Halloween. Look at her, she doesn't even need a mask," I said, smiling up at Maddie's puzzled expression.

Maddie giggled. "I think Ally's pwitty." I twisted my lips and snorted.

"Yeah Maddie," Alice said sweetly from behind me. "And Edward was just practicing his whiny little girl impression for Halloween. All he needs is a dress and pigtails and he's set. Aren't you Edward?"

"Ooh! Maybe you can borrow one of mommy's dresses Edwood!" Maddie exclaimed, bouncing up and down on her heels excitedly.

I shot Alice a murderous glare. She narrowed her eyes. "Thanks Maddie, but I don't think that'll be necessary."

Maddie looked from me to Alice and shrugged her small shoulders, as if some little instinct told her she was missing something. Moving on to something more interesting to her, she said, "Edwood, can you show me what you were showing Ally now? Peez?"

"Uh, okay," I said slowly, hoisting her up into my arms and not having any idea what I was going to show her. By this time, a few of Alice's students and their parents had made it in.

"I'm going to go get ready for class," Alice muttered, turning away. "Maddie honey, don't take too long."

I ignored the traitor and turned my full attention to my little princess. As soon as I turned her towards the window, she cried,

"Ooh, that's bootiful Edwood!" She pointed her small finger at something outside. I followed her gaze and finger to the source of her excitement.

"Mommy says when I get older, I can get a puppy. I want one just like that!" she said, wrapping her arms around my neck.

The ache crawled back into my chest at the thought of Bella. Where was she right now?

"Your mommy loves you very much," I assured Maddie, placing a soft kiss on her hair. "Now you'd better get to class before Alice has a heart attack." I set her down gently and she ran towards the studio.

She turned abruptly. "Don't leave Edwood, okay?"

I swallowed. "I'm not going anywhere."

That was enough for her. She smiled happily and skipped back to her class.

The class started, and I moved towards the flat-screen against the wall, watching Maddie through it.

"Okay, class," Alice addressed her students in her squeaky little voice, "Can anyone tell me what Friday is?"

Several little voices replied in unison, "The Halloween party!"

"That's right! Our very own Halloween party!" Alice cried back. "Is everyone coming?"

"Yes!" came more screams at different intervals and octaves.

"Can our mommies and daddies come?" asked one child

"Of course!" Alice answered sweetly. "You can bring your parents, and your friends-"

"Can Edwood come?" Maddie asked, bouncing up and down.

Even through the TV, I could see Alice fighting a smirk. "Sure," she agreed, but I could hear the disdain in her voice.

"Yay!" Maddie cried, jumping up and down. "I'm going to bring my best fwend to the Halloween potty!"

"Just make sure you remind your mommies and daddies and _friends_," Alice stressed, glancing at the TV, "that everyone who comes has to come in costume. She looked straight into the TV. "_Everyone._"

"I'm gonna be Princess Belle."

"I'm gonna be Dora!"

"I'm gonna be…"

I chuckled, despite my misery, as I listened to all of them go through their little comments, until Alice began the actual instructions. With my hands firmly in my pockets, I leaned against the wall and tried really, really hard not to think of Bella out on her date. There'd be plenty of time for that later, alone in bed. Despite the ache in my chest, a small smile crept on my lips as I watched the screen, because it was so obvious that Maddie was the best one in the class. It amused me to watch her perfect twirls, and the way her arms lifted gracefully over her head-

"I wasn't sure if you'd come," said a voice, so heartbreakingly familiar, as if I'd known it all my life instead of a few short weeks. I turned to Bella, filled with both relief and a sharper ache all at the same time. Her eyes were on the flat screen, gazing at Maddie.

"She asked me if you were coming today, but I didn't know what to answer." Her voice was so low that I was the only one who could hear her.

"I wanted to ask you first," I assured her in an equally low voice. "But I didn't get a chance to speak to you today. And then I came here early but…"

She finally turned to look at me, a puzzled frown on her beautiful face. And her eyes didn't look as cool and detached as they had all week; they seemed to be searching mine.

"Ask me what?"

"If you'd mind if I came to see Maddie today."

She looked even more confused. "Why would you ask me that?"

'_Because you've been pushing me away all week. Because you made it clear last week that Maddie was no longer an acceptable subject between us,'_ I wanted to say. But I found myself tongue-tied.

After a few seconds, she sighed and looked back up at the screen.

As if she'd read my mind, she answered, "I told you a couple of weeks ago Edward, your relationship with my daughter is very important to her. I wouldn't try to take that away from her. I didn't know…if _you_ still felt that way-"

Now it was my turn to frown. "Why wouldn't I?"

She studied me carefully. "Edward, I'm really glad you came to see Maddie tonight. I want you to know that the way you interact with her doesn't need to change based on the way you and I…interact with each other. I wasn't sure if _you_ saw it that way," she smiled gently, "but you're here, so I guess you do."

"What are you trying to say to me?"

She looked at me as if she couldn't understand why I was being so slow. "Just that, I'm glad you still want to be my daughter's friend."

"As opposed to not wanting to be _your_ friend?" I asked.

"You and I, we work together. Of course we still need to interact," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Interact? Is that what we do now? We interact with each other?"

She stared at me blankly.

Angling my entire body towards her, I said, "Bella, I don't want to just 'interact' with you. I want more than that. I thought I'd made that clear to you," I said intently.

She closed her eyes for a second and when she opened them back up, gone was the impassive look that had been there all week. There was a fire burning in them that told me I had to tread carefully. My words had awoken something.

"Edward," she said, sounding calmer than she looked, "I told you I don't do casual."

"And I told you I didn't want casual," I replied firmly.

She drew back and pursed her lips. "Look, you and I obviously have different definitions for what casual means. So let's just, you know, call a spade a spade, and agree that we're better off as acquaintances-"

I groaned and ran my hand through my hair. She stopped talking and watched me, as if she couldn't understand why I was being so difficult.

"What do you want from me Edward?" she whispered in an exasperated tone. "What exactly is it that you want to hear from me?"

I stopped and leaned in closer to her, my eyes boring into hers, trying to make her understand.

"I want you to let me explain," I said in a shaky voice. "I want to tell you what really happened-"

"No!" she hissed through gritted teeth. "Just…don't. Let's leave things the way they are so we can at least be civil with each other."

She started walking away, and at first, I was going to let her. But I'd had enough of her walking away from me this week. I quickly reached for her arm. She gasped, surprised and tried to pull away, but I held on firmly and led her quietly to my sister's office.

I closed the door behind us. When I turned to face her, she was glowering. Strangely enough, I felt so freakin' relieved. Because it was more than just a blank stare with an empty smile.

I leaned against Alice's desk and got right to it. "Last Friday, when I went to my uncle's auction-"

"Edward stop," she hissed, putting her hands out as if to stop me. "Please. I don't want you to explain."

Slowly, I reached out and took her hands. They were cold, shaking, like mine. She resisted for just an instant, but when I intertwined our fingers, she gave up.

"Damn it Bella. Why won't you let me make things right between us?"

When she looked up at me, her eyes were both here and a thousand miles away. "Because there's nothing you can say that I haven't heard before." She chuckled once, bitterly. "It wasn't me; it was a mistake; it wasn't what it looked like; I was drunk; she was drunk; he made it up; she made it up; they're just jealous of me; they're just jealous of you; she's making things up because she wants me; he's making things up because he wants you. And on and on. I've heard them all Edward, and I don't want to hear them from you."

It was all starting to make sense now. I tightened my hold around her hands. They were still shaking, but they felt warmer.

"So because you've been lied to before, you've already made up your mind that whatever I say must be a lie too. You won't even give me a chance."

She looked down at our hands, the way our fingers intertwined until it was hard to see where her hands ended and mine began. She was so close I could feel the warmth of her breath on my neck. I could smell the sweet scent of strawberries floating in the air around me. I could almost feel the beat of her heart against her chest. She tightened her grip, almost painfully, but soon tried to pull away again. I didn't let her. I held on firmly, and after a couple of seconds, she stopped fighting, tightening her grip again, as if she were trying to use our hands to stay grounded. She lifted one of our joined hands and with a sad smile, stroked my cheek softly with the back of her hand. I closed my eyes, but any encouragement that gesture may have given me was negated by her next words.

"Edward, the second I let you offer me an explanation, the second I hear you utter one of those phrases, I'll lose all respect for you. And then I'll lose whatever self-respect I've managed to garner for myself. I don't want that to happen." She dropped our hands back down.

I let go of one of her hands and moved it to her chin, lifting it up gently and forcing her to meet my gaze. She was still fighting. I could see the struggle in her eyes. Whether she was fighting for us or against us, I couldn't tell.

"Bella," I murmured softly, "You said you wanted to see the real me, not the one in the tabloids. But now you won't let me show him to you."

"I thought I was starting to get to know the real you." She looked away from me again. "But now I don't know…"

"Yes you do know," I insisted, following her eyes with mine. She still wouldn't look at me. "Bella look at me," I pleaded. "Please look at me." Hesitantly, she met my eyes again. I could see the hurt in them, the doubt, and I knew that although part of it was caused by those damned pictures, part of that hurt had been done to her a long time ago, when the seeds of distrust that were gnawing at her had first been planted.

"I hate what he did to you," I whispered. "I hate that you're closing yourself off like this. And I hate that I can't blame you for what you think I am. But Bella, I swear to you, I am not Paul." I brought a hand up to her cheek, caressing her softly. She leaned into my hand and the warmth of her soft skin traveled all the way up my arm and through my body. Her dark eyes were almost completely hidden by heavy lids, and my own eyes trailed down to her slightly parted lips, remembering their softness, the searing heat that radiated through them. She was so close, her warm breath falling on my lips now; it would take nothing to lean down and skim my lips over hers. If she pulled away, I wouldn't force it. But if she responded, if she let her lips move with mine, if she let me pull her closer...

Her eyes suddenly popped open. "Those are pretty words Edward, but I've heard those before too." She pulled back, looking away.

I shook my head. "They're more than just words Bella," I murmured back intently. "Just let me prove it." And without thinking, I leaned into her, trailing back and forth between her jaw and her cheek with my nose, and inhaled deeply. She smelled so good, felt so soft, so smooth against me. "I'm not giving up on us," I whispered in her ear. She shuddered.

I traced circles with my thumb along the inside of her wrist, trying to soothe her. I could've stayed in that office forever like that, feeling the beat of her heart just a couple of inches away from mine. But time refused to stand still, and the door swung open. Maddie bounded in, looking between me and her mother. Quickly, Bella stepped away and went to her daughter.

"Mommy you're here!" Maddie exclaimed happily. "Did you see me dancing?" she asked.

Bella composed her features quickly and gave her daughter a huge smile. "Yes, I did sweetie. You were wonderful." Maddie gleamed at her mother. She looked at me again.

"Were you showing Edwood the faces you can make for Halloween, like Ally was?"

Bella frowned. "What?"

"Never mind," I said quickly, just as Alice bounded in. She looked between Bella and me and smiled wryly.

"Bella, how was your date?"

I cringed, feeling a sharp stab of pain through my chest. It suddenly occurred to me that Bella didn't want to listen to my explanations because she just didn't care anymore...because she'd found someone else…

"What date?" Bella said, looking genuinely puzzled. Her eyes widened. "Oh, you mean dinner with James and Rosalie? It went well; we were able to flush out a couple of pretty good ideas."

Alice looked at me and gave me an impish grin. "Oh, that's right. I forgot Rose was going too."

Bella gave Alice a confused half-smile. "Okay."

"Wait. You- you mean- you mean," I stuttered, while all three woman stared at me. "You went out to dinner with Rose and James?"

"Yes," Bella answered slowly. "Well," she added, "It was more of a working dinner. James has been very helpful this week in helping me get up to speed with the entire Eversoft account," I suppressed a smirk, of course he'd been helpful, fucking prick, - "and then he got this idea for a new slogan, but it needed to be flushed out a bit. And you know it's usually a good idea to brainstorm while everything's still fresh in your head, so he suggested we finish brainstorming over dinner, and-"

I arched an eyebrow. "He suggested who finish brainstorming?"

Bella shrugged. "He and I."

I felt the muscles in my jaw tighten. I knew that motherfucker was up to no good. He'd probably been up for a month coming up with that plan.

"So I told Rose," Bella continued matter-of-factly, "and she decided to come along so that she could help us structure our ideas. You know she's really good at that."

A crooked smile formed on my lips. "Yes, she really is good at that, isn't she?" I would owe Rose until the second coming. No doubt about it. And I'd pay up happily. I'd never loved my sister-in-law more.

My sister on the other hand…

She was smirking smugly, her eyes laughing at me. "Hurts like hell, doesn't it?"

I nodded, knowing exactly what she was referring to.

"Maybe next time you'll use some of that sense God gave you," she said.

Bella looked between the both of us, completely lost.

Thankfully, my little princess saved the day before I was forced to explain. "Mommy, Edwood's coming to the Halloween potty with us!"

I watched Bella for her reaction, but it didn't seem to affect her much one way or the other. Then again, she'd already told me my relationship with Maddie had nothing to do with my lack of a relationship with her.

"Is he darling?" she grinned at Maddie. "That sounds like fun."

Maddie walked over to me and put her warm little hand in mine, offering me a huge grin. _See how easy that is Bella?_ I thought to myself. _Why do you have to fight it so hard?_

"Edwood, me and mommy-"

"Mommy and me," Bella corrected gently.

"Mommy and me" - Maddie continued – "are going to be pwincesses for Ally's potty. What are you going to be?"

I was about to say myself, when Alice chimed in,

"Well, if both you and your mommy are going to be princesses, then obviously Edward has to be the prince. Don't you Edward?" Alice asked sweetly.

I was about to say no way in hell, when Maddie tugged on my hand. "Oh peez Edwood. Peez be Pwince Chahming. He's so handsome, just like you." Alice choked on a snort. "Peez?" she asked again, looking up at me hopefully through those big brown eyes and long eyelashes.

Would I ever be able to say no to that face?

I nodded once, causing both Alice and Bella to laugh, when Bella suddenly grew serious.

"Hey Alice, when's that party again?"

"Friday," Alice answered.

"Oh darn!" Bella moaned. "It's in the city right?"

Alice nodded. "I rented out one of the party rooms at Madame Tussaud's in Times Square. The studio's not big enough to hold all the students and parents."

"Darn!" Bella repeated.

"What's the problem?" I asked.

"I was going to bring Maddie in to work with me that day, so I wouldn't have to come back to Brooklyn after work just to trek back into the city."

"That's fine Bella," I said, tightening my grip around Maddie's hand. "I'm sure Rose won't have a problem with it either."

"I didn't think she would," Bella agreed, "but I'm meeting with the Cartwrights Friday morning. I can't very well bring Maddie into the meeting with me."

A huge grin erupted on my face, and I reached down quickly and picked Maddie up. She giggled happily. "No problem. I could watch Maddie Friday morning while you're at your meeting."

She pursed her lips. "Edward, I couldn't ask you to do that."

I rolled my eyes. "You're not asking. I'm volunteering. I don't have any big meetings planned for Friday. I'll clear my calendar for the morning, and she could stay with me."

"What do you think?" I asked, turning to Maddie. Her brown eyes sparkled. "Would you like to hang out with me at work on Friday? We could color all you want, and play with the copy machine, and bother Emmett and Jasper."

Maddie squealed in delight, bouncing in my arms. "I want to make more copies of my hand, and of Angie's face!"

We both turned to Bella, who was watching us skeptically.

"Peez mommyyyy," Maddie asked.

Bella sighed in defeat. "Well, if you're sure Edward-"

"Yay!" Maddie squealed again, clapping her little hands together and then throwing her arms around me. I chuckled. I wondered if this was how it felt for Bella, having Maddie around to make her feel better about any situation.

I looked over at Bella, and she was watching me with a small smile on her face. The cold, empty smile was gone. She was still guarded, but there was something else there. I sighed, and smiled back at her. I wasn't giving up. I'd give her time, like my father said, because I knew she was worth it. I smiled wider, remembering Friday was only two days away.

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**A/N: The difference between how men and women handle a situation? When Bella sees the article and pics of Ed and Tanya, she has to take a step back and re-examine Edward and his intentions, what her expectations are, etc. Edward sees Bella walking with James? He's gotta swoop in right away and reclaim what's rightfully his. Ha!**

**Alright guys. You're all definitely going to want to tune in for the next chapter. Trust me.**

**Reviews are like Edward whispering in my ear...**


	15. Ch 14 Tricks, Treats & finally Okays

**A/N: Had enough angst for now? Alright then, get ready for fluff. Mostly. (Hey, what can I say? I like me some angst). Enjoy.**

**Thanks to my Beta Danna0724, who fills in my blank spaces with all kinds of cool stuff! **

**All characters (except for my Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 14 – Tricks, Treats, Nor'Easters and finally Okays**

**Chapter Song – Because You Loved Me, by Celine Dion **(from Maddie to Edward.)

"No Edwood, not _that_ blue!" Maddie cried out in horror. She pulled the crayon out of my hand, shooting me a flustered side glance before shoving it back in its box and pushing the other crayons around with determined little fingers.

"You can't culuh Cindawella's cassoh with that blue! It's too dahk!" she scolded in a tone that let me know that fact should've been plainly obvious, before the ends of her cherub mouth twisted up and her coffee-colored eyes shone as she found what she was looking for.

"Heuh," she sighed triumphantly, placing another crayon in my hands. "Evwyone knows Cindawella's cassoh is _baby_ blue and white."

"Sorry princess. I guess I must've been out the day they taught that at Dartmouth," I chuckled, taking up my coloring again with the _correct_ crayon. I looked around at what was once my revered office, smirking in amusement at the piles of papers, crayons, markers, water colors, coloring books, random toys and water bottles scattered about not-so-strategically. Barely a square inch of the dark wood floors remained visible. Somewhere under all this clutter lay my desk, as well as documents, files, and proposals that I'd spent countless hours working on. I shook my head, chuckling to myself.

"Why come they didn't teach you that at Dahtmooth?" Maddie asked, momentarily distracted from her coloring. I kept forgetting sarcasm in any shape, way or form went over her pretty four-year old head.

"Never mind," I said, smiling up at her. "You're teaching me now, and I bet you're doing a much better job than anyone else could've."

"Okay," she agreed with an easy shrug before turning her attention back to our joint work of art. I grinned, watching the two small lines that formed between her brows while she concentrated on staying inside the lines. I'd seen that same sharp focus on Bella a few times - that exact wrinkling between her brows - when we'd discussed her designs. Unfortunately, over the past few days that'd become the only acceptable topic of conversation between us. Thankfully, she hadn't let the awkwardness between us interfere with the play date – that's what Maddie called it – that her daughter and I had planned.

Ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

Anxious little fists pounding against my office door had reassured me early this morning that Bella hadn't ignored our agreement. The craptastic weather outside had added to my uneasiness. Although it was only late October, the weather service had issued warnings this morning for what was probably one of the earliest Nor'Easters expected on record. New York City was warned to expect at least three inches of rain by nightfall, as well as winds in excess of fifty miles an hour. It sure as hell wasn't a picture perfect day out, and I'd been afraid it would keep the Swan girls away. I should've known better. This was probably a walk in the park for the girls from Washington.

Surprised at my own level of enthusiasm, I'd shot out of my seat and swung the door open to reveal a tiny, glowing princess. Literally.

"Edwood, I'm heuh!" the princess in front of me had exclaimed breathlessly. "Are you ready to play with me?" Dressed up in a glittering yellow ball gown with puffy sleeves and a sparkling tiara to boot, Maddie bounded into my arms – our typical greeting - ready for me to pick her up. I obliged her enthusiastically.

"You. Look. Beautiful." I exclaimed, kissing her soft head. She giggled heartily.

"Don't tell me. Let me guess," I said quickly, closing one eye and pretending to think hard. I snapped my fingers. "Beauty right? From Beauty and the Beast?"

"Yes! Pwincess Belle!" she cried out delightedly, bouncing up and down while I balanced her carefully in the crook of my arms. "How did you guess?"

"Because you look just like her," I stated matter-of-factly.

"That's what my mommy says," she confirmed. "She says I even have pwetty bwown hauh like huh." She pulled on her chestnut locks.

I finally let my eyes travel to the figure that stood quietly by the door. She was watching Maddie with a tender smile on her face. Her eyes darted to me and she offered me a tentative smile.

I swallowed. "Your mommy's right. You have beautiful brown hair." I turned my eyes back to Maddie.

"Do you know what Belle means?"

Maddie shook her head. "What?" she asked, her dark eyes confused, as if I'd just offered to explain thermonuclear dynamics to her.

I looked back at Bella with a crooked grin. "It means the same thing as your mommy's name. It means beautiful."

"Willy?" Maddie asked, wide-eyed.

"Really," I confirmed.

Bella's cheeks turned pink. She chuckled and took a couple of steps forward, bringing her into my office. "Thanks, but my name's not actually Bella. It's _Isa_bella. Totally different meaning," she smirked lightheartedly.

I shrugged. "Doesn't make a difference. A rose by any other name…"

Her blush deepened and she looked down. When she looked back up, concern was etched across her features.

"Edward, are you sure this is okay?" she asked, her brows furrowed. "Look, I spoke to Mrs. Cope in HR and she said she wouldn't mind watching Maddie while I'm in my meeting today, so if you don't think-"

I smirked. "Bella, we'll be fine. Won't we Maddie?

"Uh huh," Maddie agreed impatiently. "Edwood let's go culuh." She squirmed for me to put her down. As soon as I did, she pulled a pink backpack out of Bella's hands and ran to my desk. I chuckled.

"Maddie-" Bella called out, one arm outstretched. Maddie didn't even glance back. Bella huffed in defeat and put her arm down. Biting her lip, she turned to me with an anxious expression.

"We'll be fine," I assured her again. "Angie's cleared my morning. I have absolutely nothing else to do but remain at Maddie's beck and call. I'll take good care of her." I leaned in closer. "I promise."

She took a deep breath and nodded, still biting her lip, but her features appeared more relaxed. "She's got some books and toys in her backpack, and a couple of drinks and snacks. And a change of clothing-"

"Edwood, can I play on your computuh?" Maddie called from behind my desk. I turned around and walked over to her while Bella went on with her directions.

"Hey Maddie, want to see something cool?" I asked, bringing up the Illustrator program on my laptop for her to play around with. She squealed in delight.

"Here, let me show you how to use this," I said, navigating around the easier tools for her, while trying to keep an ear on Bella's instructions.

"…and don't give her any sweets Edward; her system can't handle them this early in the morning…"

"Mm hmm," I agreed distractedly. "Look Maddie, you move the mouse around like this-"

"…she crashes. Oh, and if she starts wriggling around doing a little bouncing dance it means…"

"Edwood, how did you do that?" Maddie cried, enthralled by the graphic program.

"Watch this," I said, showing her how to make basic shapes with the program.

"…otherwise she'll wait until the last second," Bella continued.

I finally looked back up at her, one corner of my mouth twitching up. "Bella, I've got it. Go get ready for your meeting," I encouraged. "We'll see you in a few hours."

She twisted her mouth, gnawing on the inside of her lip. "If there's any problem at all, call me and I'll come get her. Even if it's during the m-"

"There won't be any problems," I assured her with a chuckle. "Maddie, wave bye to mommy."

Maddie looked up excitedly. She flashed Bella a huge grin, showcasing all her pearly whites. Fluttering her little fingers, she said "Bye mommy," in her little sing-song voice, before quickly turning her attention back to the computer screen.

Bella sighed. "Bye baby," she said, before moving her eyes to me.

"Bye mommy," I repeated, fluttering my fingers wryly. She chuckled and shook her head, walking away.

**8:30 am**

Maddie and I played around with the computer, but after a while, she began getting distracted. "I don't want to play with the computuh anymo-uh. Can we culuh in my culuhwing books now?"

"Sure," I agreed readily. The coloring books came out. And then markers, and then water colors. And then papers. And then she got thirsty so I pulled out the small container of milk Bella had packed for her while I grabbed a bottle of water for myself from the mini-fridge, and as soon as she saw the water, she wanted that. So we put the milk in the fridge and gave her one of the water bottles instead. And then she took out her doll Angie and her friend Miss Lilly, and we re-enacted a few scenes from what I assumed was a morning cartoon of some sorts. And then Angie and Miss Lilly got put to the side and something called Polly Pockets came out, which were dolls with about fifty million pieces of clothing that no four-year old could possibly get on and no adult could possibly figure out either. Holy hell, what were we advertisers selling these kids? And then after Polly's fifty million articles of clothing and shoes and handbags were satisfactorily scattered about, we went back to coloring.

We were on Cinderella's castle now, and since Maddie was deep in concentration I took the opportunity to gaze over at her, at the way her little hands moved so quickly and surely across the page, at the way she bit her little lip as she focused, just like her mother, at the shape of her button nose, turned up slightly at the end, just like her-

"Edwood what ah you doing? Don't stop! Come on, culuh!" my little princess demanded, placing her warm hand on top of mine and moving it around the page. The lines between her brows deepened into ones of disapproval rather than concentration.

"We have to finish this pichuh so that mommy can hang it up in her cue- cue- cue-"

"Cubicle," I helped out gently and waited to see how it would come out of her pouty little mouth.

"Cue-coh!" she exclaimed. She smiled uncertainly, waiting for my approval; turning my insides to mush.

I grinned. "Perfect," I said quietly, pinching the little nose I'd just been focused on, because it really was.

**9:15 am**

In the middle of our ninth page, Maddie abruptly set her crayon down.

"I don't want to culuh anymo-uh. Can we go make copies of ow-uh hands?"

"Sure princess," I said, lifting her off the chair and settling her on the floor. She put her hand in mine, and we walked out of my office. Ange smiled when she saw Maddie.

"Goodness, aren't you just the cutest little thing?" she exclaimed, coming from around her desk to look at Maddie. Maddie stood shyly next to me, tightening her grip on my hand.

"Bella's little girl?" Ange asked, although I suspected she already knew the answer. Like a great secretary, she knew everything that went on in the office, but kept to her work and to herself.

I nodded.

"How old are you?" she asked, kneeling down to Maddie's field of vision.

Maddie quietly put up one, then two, then three, and finally four fingers.

"Four years old!" Angela exclaimed, as if she were shocked. "You're such a big girl!" Maddie smiled; her grip loosened slightly.

"My sister's got a four-year old little girl too. May I ask your name?" Angela asked gently.

Maddie looked up at me for reassurance. I nodded. "Madisen," she answered quietly.

"Madisen. That's a beautiful name. And you look adorable in your costume. Belle's always been one of my favorite princesses," Angela exclaimed, as if she were letting her in on a secret. Maddie's uncertain smile grew.

Angela straightened back up. "Have fun today Madisen, okay? I'll see you later." Maddie smiled but didn't answer.

As we were walking away, Maddie turned and called out, "Maddie."

Angela looked up from where she'd gone back to sit at her desk. "What honey?"

Maddie looked up at me. I turned to Angela. "She's telling you that you can call her Maddie."

Angela smiled. "Maddie it is. Bye Maddie!"

Maddie's smile turned into a grin. "Bye!" she waved. And when she looked up at me, something about her expression made my throat constrict in the most bittersweet way.

**9:30 am**

Maddie and I sat on the floor in the middle of my office, using strange little scissors and long thin purple sticks to cut and paste the copies of our hands we'd just made in the copy room. The little lines had appeared between her eyebrows again.

"Here Edwood, now you paste the little hand on top of the big hand, and then-"

She stopped, strange scissors paused in mid air, startled by the vibration of the long windows as the rain pounded from the outside; the blowing wind sending an eerie hiss through the office.

"Are you scared?"

"No, 'cause I know you'll take caeuh of me."

"Always."

**10:00 am**

Maddie jiggled around on her bottom. "I'm hungry Edwood."

"Let's see what snacks mommy sent for you," I said, standing up and walking to her pink backpack and pulling out a paper bag. I placed it on what was once my desk and pulled out a plastic container. Maddie walked over to me and stared at the container while I peeled the top off. Carrot sticks, celery sticks and a smaller container full of peanut butter. Maddie wrinkled her nose and grimaced.

"I don't want cawotts and celwy," she scowled. "What else is theuh?" She bounced anxiously from one foot to the other.

I put my hand in the paper bag again and pulled out a shiny red apple.

"Uh uh." She shook her head vehemently for emphasis, loosening her tiara.

Adjusting her hair piece, I asked, "Would you like to go across the street to get something?"

"Shooah!" she agreed, running for the door.

"Hold on," I chuckled. "You've got to get your coat and rain boots on."

She danced impatiently, still bouncing from one foot to the other while I buttoned her coat and pulled her hood up over her head. Grabbing an umbrella and my own coat, we headed downstairs.

The storm looked even worse from down here. Huge drops of rain fell diagonally from the dark grey sky. From the safety of the lobby we watched as umbrella after umbrella was blown away from its owners, leaving them running for cover and at the rain and wind's mercy. I looked down at the useless umbrella in one hand, and then at the wide-eyed princess on my other.

"Are you scared?" I asked her again.

"No."

Putting the umbrella aside, I let go of Maddie's hand while I removed my coat.

"Trust me?" I asked.

"Uh huh."

I picked her up and looked at her carefully. "Now listen princess." She squirmed in my arms. "You listening?"

"Uh huh."

"When I count to three, you're gonna wrap those little arms around my neck and hold on for your life. You got it?"

"Got it."

"One. Two. Ready?"

"Wait. What does hold on for your life mean?"

"You just hold on tight to me, okay?"

"'Kay."

"Three!" I threw my coat over her head, completely hiding her from the elements, and booked it through the doors, across the flooded streets, and into Starbucks.

By the time I removed my coat from over Maddie, she was laughing hysterically.

"Edwood that was so much fun! Again! Again!"

I chuckled, shaking the rain off of my hair and wetting her, causing her to fall into another fit of giggles.

"Fun for you!" I laughed. "But don't worry; we'll have to do it again if we plan on getting back to the office." She squealed in delight.

I was drenched, so I put her down while we walked over to the display by the register.

"What would you like?" I asked her, pointing towards the display.

Her eyes grew wide. "You mean I can pick something from theuh?"

"'Course," I answered.

Her small mouth popped open in a huge O. Something suddenly tugged at the edges of my memory...

"Can I have a bwownie?" Maddie asked, having found her voice.

I frowned for a second. For some strange reason I felt as if I was missing something. But after a few seconds when nothing came to me, I gave up. With a smile and shrug I said, "Sure, brownie it is."

Ten minutes later, we were on our way back up the elevator to my office, two brownies and two hot chocolates tucked into a wet paper bag, and Maddie giggling happily at my side.

**10:30 am**

When we arrived back at the office, I settled Maddie down at my desk with a brownie and hot chocolate. Pulling out a spare suit from my closet, I ran into my bathroom quickly and changed at record speed. When I walked out, Maddie smiled up happily at me, already half way through with her brownie.

"I think Alice might have to reschedule tonight's party," I said, looking at how dark it was getting outside. "Might not be too safe to have everybody trek into the city tonight with this weather."

I was already trying to figure out how to convince Bella to let me take her home. It wasn't even about wanting to spend time with her today – well, it was _always_ at least partly about that – but the weather outside was really bad. The falling rain was freezing, biting; it'd felt like thousands of tiny icicles stabbing at me as I'd ran Maddie and me back into the building. And the high winds made it hard to breathe.

Maddie's lips turned down, her bottom one protruding slightly. "I wanted to go to Ally's potty. And I woe-uh my pwitty dwess and evwything."

I chuckled, flipping her bottom lip gently with my finger. "Don't worry. Knowing Ally, she'll reschedule it. Halloween is her season, after all."

She stared at me blankly before her eyes brightened. "Will you take me twick or tweating?"

As much as I wanted to say yes, it wasn't my call to make.

"Maddie, I-"

Two loud rasps on the side of my door distracted me, and I looked up at Emmett and Jasper. They sauntered in slowly with amused expressions.

"Hi Emmett! Hi Jaspuh!" Maddie greeted them through a mouthful of brownie.

"Oh my God, it's true!" Emmett said, coming to stand in front of Maddie. "Someone told me Princess Belle was here today, but I thought they were kidding." He folded his arms in front of him and pursed his lips. " 'What'd she be doing here?' I said. But it's true, it's really true!"

Maddie giggled. "Emmett it's me, Maddie."

Emmett's brows furrowed, he moved closer to Maddie, dropping on his knees to her level.

"Maddie?" he asked, pretending to examine her more closely. Maddie nodded emphatically, wiggling around on her seat again.

"Wow! Maddie, that is you! You had me fooled! I mean, you look just like Belle!"

Maddie released another round of giggles and took another bite of her brownie, opening her mouth much wider than I could've imagined her being able to. Something about the way she bounced and wriggled in her seat was beginning to make me anxious.

Jasper snickered next to Emmett. "How do you know what Belle looks like?" he asked in a low voice.

Emmett turned around and spoke low out of one side of his mouth. "Are you fucking kidding me? That Belle chick is hawt!" He wriggled his eyebrows. "Sorta had a thing for her when I was a kid."

I snorted and rolled my eyes. "Um, you do realize she's just a cartoon, don't you?"

Emmett pshawed. "Hey she still looked good. Had that whole sweet girl next door thing going on. Anyway, you're one to talk," he laughed. "Don't think I don't remember you moaning Jessica Rabbit's name in your sleep when we were kids. 'Oh Jessica, you're so beautiful, muah, muah, muah!" He made stupid kissing noises, puckering his lips.

I shoved him away and moved behind Maddie to cover her ears. "Chill out! Don't you see there are pre-schoolers present?" I hissed.

Emmett snickered guiltily. "I'm sorry. But I had to see this for myself," he whispered. "Rosie told Jasper and me you were watching Maddie this morning, and I didn't believe her. But fuck me upside down in a barrel if it isn't true!" he chuckled.

"I don't see what the big deal is," I smirked, tightening my hands over Maddie's ears. She seemed too engrossed in her mid-morning snack to mind anyway.

"You don't see what the big deal is?" Jasper asked incredulously. "The Edward Cullen we know does not babysit. Like ever."

"Yeah, well…" I said, taking my hands off of Maddie's ears and passing one through my hair. I turned my back to them and walked nervously towards the windows.

Jasper gave me a bemused smile. "Shit man, look at you," he mused, shaking his head. "Who'd a thought?"

I didn't respond.

Emmett guffawed loudly out of nowhere. "Look at him? Never mind looking at him. Look at that munchkin go!" I turned to where he was looking. Maddie had finished her brownie and hot chocolate and was now dancing in the middle of the room to non-existent music, shaking her little bottom back and forth and giggling amusedly.

I frowned with a small smile on my face. "What is she doing?" I asked aloud.

Jasper pursed his lips, a humored expression on his face. "Ed man, what did you feed that kid?"

I shrugged. "A brownie and hot chocolate. Why?"

They both stared at me.

"Holy hell Edward. Are you seriously that stupid?" Jasper asked.

"What?" I asked.

We all turned towards Maddie, who'd now begun singing loudly. "Dowa, Dowa, Dowa the Explowah!" She danced back and forth, moving her little feet and her fisted hands to and fro, in what I could only assume was the Pre-K set's version of Salsa dancing. All of a sudden she shifted her moves and stretched her arms all the way out, gliding across the room, "Jay, Jay the Jet Plane! That's me!" she cried, giggling loudly.

Jasper and Emmett both laughed. "Dude, I'm no expert or anything," Emmett chortled, "but that right there has got all the markings of a bona fide sugar rush. That kid is hyper."

"She's not hyper," I murmured half-heartedly, watching Maddie zoom around the office. A short snippet from Bella's careful instructions this morning finally returned to me.

'…_don't give her any sweets Edward; her system can't handle them this early in the morning…'_

Holy Shit. I'd turned Maddie into a Gremlin.

My jaw hanging slightly askew, I watched Maddie climb onto my leather chair and then jump onto my desk, sending a flutter of papers onto the floor. Liking the look of that, she kicked more papers to the ground, sending an avalanche of both coloring pages and proposals alike flying.

Jasper and Emmett watched the show in awe, laughing hysterically at her. And the harder they laughed, the more she kicked and danced. Snapping out of my stupor, I walked swiftly over to my desk.

"Alright princess," I said in a calm tone, "That's enough of the show." I picked her up in my arms. "You're going to hurt yourself up there."

Maddie giggled. "Weeee! It's waining paypuhs!" she squealed, squirming and jumping out of my arms. She started circling the room again, dancing and giggling loudly.

"Still say she's not hyper?" Jasper asked wryly.

"Dude, she's got more energy than a Jersey Housewife trapped in a mall. Did you see it jump out of Ed's arms? Little thing's like the Energizer bunny on crack." Emmett smiled widely. "Hey, can we video tape her? It may actually be a good pitch to lure the Energizer guys over to CCW," Emmett said, tapping his chin.

I glared at him. "First, stop calling Maddie an it. Second, you video tape this and you and I are gonna go at it.

Emmett sucked his teeth; disappointed.

Maddie's dance moves grew increasingly…questionable. Done with the Salsa, she crossed one leg over the other, and started bouncing up and down. At first I thought she was going to start doing her ballet moves, but then she started squirming and scrunched up her face, and then pulled a pretty-good-though-inappropriate-for-a-four-year-old Michael Jackson impersonation, grabbing herself while bouncing up and down even faster.

I was seriously starting to worry about what she was learning on that Dora show.

"I gotta potty!" she suddenly yelled out.

I sighed. "I know Maddie. I know you want to go to Alice's party. But I really don't think-"

"No!" she said. "I wanna go potty!"

"I'm sure Alice will reschedule the party. It'll probably be next week and I promise-"

"Edwood I gotta P Ps!" she yelled, squirming and clutching herself tighter. "I gotta P Ps bad!"

I frowned, tilting my head to the side. P Ps? What the hell was that? Was that short for something?

"Oooh shit," Emmett hissed suddenly. "I think she's gotta pee Edward."

"For the love of all that's holy, what in the world is a-" It hit me then.

"Oh. Shit." I mumbled. I turned back to Maddie, terrified. "Do you have to go the bathroom Maddie?"

"Uh huh," she squirmed. "I gotta pee pees willy willy bad!"

"Hold on, hold on," I begged. "Let me just get Angela so she can help you okay?" She squirmed even more, bouncing up and down insistently. "Can you hold it in Maddie?"

"Uh huh," she whimpered, not leaving me with too much confidence.

I ran out of the office and cursed my luck as soon as I reached Angela's desk. "Shit!" I growled, running back into the office.

"Maddie, can you wait until Angela comes back?"

"Uh huh," she whimpered again, still holding herself.

"Oh Jesus," I grumbled miserably, shooting Emmett and Jasper desperate glares.

"Don't look at me," Emmett said, putting his hands up, palms out in front of him. "I'm not the one playing Ward Cleaver here."

Before I could respond, Maddie shot out of my office faster than any four-year old should legally be allowed to move.

"Where'd she go?" I asked, looking at Emmett and Jasper in bewilderment.

Jasper shrugged. "The hell would we know."

It only took me five, maybe six seconds to run out after her, but once I reached the open hallway outside my office, Maddie was nowhere to be seen.

I ran my hand anxiously through my hair, doing a three-hundred-and-sixty degree turn in place. "Which way did she go?" I asked Emmett and Jasper.

They both shrugged, their eyes searching the hallways too. I couldn't understand it. She'd only had about a five second head start on us. And her legs were less than _half_ the length of ours! How could she have disappeared in five seconds? I felt my balls shrivel up in horror, because Bella was definitely going to castrate me today.

"Alright," I said, sounding more in control than I felt. I pointed in one direction. "Em, you go that way," – I pointed in the opposite direction – "and Jazz you go that way." I pointed straight ahead. "I'll go that way. She's still gotta be on this floor. I'll go check the conference room, maybe she ran in there."

Before I could take a step Emmett said, "You'd better hope she didn't go in there. That's where Bella is right now with the Cartwrights."

"_What?"_ I whisper-yelled. "Why is she up here with them? Why aren't they in the conference room down on her floor?"

Emmett shrugged. "Seems the Cartwrights prefer the view from this conference room. You know, the glass walls and floor-to-ceiling windows and all."

I closed my eyes and let out a huge breath. I was so fucked it wasn't even funny. Never mind castrating me, I'd be joining Jimmy Hoffa tonight.

"Alright, I'm going to go check around the conference room. You guys look around and let me know if you find her."

With wide-eyes, they each took off in separate directions while I quickly made my way towards the conference room, whisper-shouting Maddie's name along the way. The sound of my footsteps reverberated around the quiet office space and my heart beat noisily in my ears. Where was she? She couldn't have left the floor, could she? A cold chill rose in my chest and my eyes opened-wide at the thought that she might be riding down the elevators right then, on her way to the lobby. Oh Jesus.

As I rounded the corner I almost ran into Tom, the guy from the mail-room, pushing his squeaky cart down the halls.

"Hey, Mr. Cullen, everything okay?" he asked, seeing my panicked expression.

I decided to take him into my confidence. "Uhm Tom, have you by any chance uh...seen a small, jittery princess wearing rain boots and brownie stains around her mouth running around here?"

He gave me a peculiar smile. "Actually yeah, I have. She went that way," he said, pointing from where he'd just come. I thanked him as I ran.

"Maddie! Maddie!" I whisper-shouted, running in the direction I'd been pointed at, and then had to stop short. The conference room. It was just a few feet away, and with only glass walls enclosing it, there'd be no hiding if I passed by. As I debated whether I should crawl by on my hands and knees, the ends of a yellow sparkly dress peeked out from behind one of the empty cubicles just around the corner from the conference room, and while I stared, one little brown eye peeked out from behind the cubicle's wall, slowly and deliberately. When she saw me looking straight at her, she squealed in delight and jumped out of her hiding space.

"Catch me Edwood!" she yelled, and ran right past the conference room. I cringed, and took off after her; there'd be no hiding now. As I passed the conference room, I glanced in quickly and almost breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Bella and the Cartwrights' heads down in deep focus on the proposal Bella had handed out. I made my way past as quickly as possible, but when I felt a distinct tingling in my stomach, I got the feeling I hadn't passed by as unnoticed as I'd hoped.

"Maddie!" I called again just as I was rounding the next corner, and then stopped.

"Did anyone lose a little beast?" Alice called out, holding a laughing and wriggling Maddie upside down in her arms.

"I'm not a beast, I'm Pwincess Belle! The Beast is a monstuh!" she giggled.

I drew in a deep, deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling the blood returning to my body.

"From the look on Edward's face," Alice smirked at me, "I get the feeling you've been more of a monster than a princess this morning!" she teased Maddie, tickling her sides.

"No! Don't do that!" I said to Alice, approaching them quickly. "She's gotta pee!" I hissed.

"I gotta go pee pees," Maddie repeated. "And now I gotta go poo pees too!"

"Aah," Alice nodded knowingly. She turned Maddie over right side up, jerking her head towards the ladies room at the end of the hall. "Come on kiddo, Aunty Ally'll take you."

We walked swiftly towards the ladies room, Maddie still in Alice's arms. Alice turned to smirk at me. "I get the feeling there's one hell of a story behind this, and if I play my cards right, I could get something nice and sparkly out of it."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "You have no idea." Alice chuckled and stepped into the ladies room with Maddie, while I waited patiently outside. Ten minutes and fifty 'thank you Jesus's' later, they emerged from the bathroom, Alice bearing a not-so-bouncy Maddie next to her. As soon as they were out, I knelt down in front of Maddie and gave her the most serious look I could manage with her.

"Maddie, you must never do that again. Don't disappear where I can't see you. I was very worried. I need to be able to see you to know that you're okay. Can you understand that?"

Her big brown eyes bore into mine, and she nodded with a solemn look on her face.

"Okay." I said. "Now let's go back to my office." I started to stand, when her little voice stopped me.

"I'm sohwy Edwood. Ah you mad at me now?" Her tiny voice sounded as if it were about to break.

I knelt back down, smiling at her gently. "No Maddie. I'm not mad at you. I was just very worried for a while there. You need to understand that you're very special to me, and it scared me not to know where you were. I would be very sad if I couldn't see you again, and so would your mommy. So you must always make sure either me, or your mommy, or Ally," I added, glancing up at my sister, "or one of us grown-ups knows where you are."

She nodded solemnly again, her bottom lip protruding. "Ah you still my fwend?" she asked shyly.

I took her into my arms and held her tightly, and she wrapped her little arms around my neck. "Always Maddie. Always," I assured her.

We took the long way back to my office, avoiding the conference room, as I balanced a more subdued Maddie in my arms. She was humming quietly to herself now, and I guessed getting the brownie and hot chocolate out of her system, so to speak, had calmed her down. I turned to Alice and whispered,

"Alice, I'm begging you, for the love of all that's holy, please don't say anything to Bella about this. I'll do anything. I'll buy you whatever you want, sign over the deed to the condo to you right now, get you that little yellow Porsche you've been eyeing, just please, please, please don't breathe a word of this to Bella. Her trust in me's already a big fat zero. This'll just put me into negative territory."

Alice pshawed and then pursed her lips. "Relax Edward, I'm not going to leave you homeless. The upper west side isn't my scene anyway," – she arched an eyebrow – "although I have been wanting that little yellow Porsche, haven't I? Jasper seems to think I don't need it, living in the city and all. Blah, blah, blah." She rolled her eyes and did a motion where she opened and closed the space between her thumb and the rest of her fingers. Her eyes quickly widened in excitement. "But if my big brother were to give it to me as say, an early Christmas present…" Looking at my serious expression, she chuckled.

"She trusts you Edward, probably even more than she realizes herself. Otherwise you wouldn't have been allowed within a hundred feet of Maddie. And not just today, but every other day she's let you near her little girl."

I sighed. "That's different."

She stopped and faced me, causing me to stop too. I turned to face her. "Trust is trust Edward," she whispered. "And if she trusts you with her daughter, well then, there really isn't a bigger vote of confidence than that." She winked at me and smiled, scrunching her nose quickly, "She'll come around," she finished confidently, and turned to keep walking. I turned too, and then felt her smack me in the arm, hard. Before I could say anything, she hissed, "Just don't fuck it up again!" I shook my head and kept walking.

**11:00 am**

When we reached my office, Maddie climbed out of my arms and pulled on my sleeve.

"Can I have my milk now please?" she asked sweetly, rubbing at her eyes.

"Sure princess," I said, walking over to the mini-fridge and pulling out her milk. It was cold.

"Do you need it warmed up?" I asked. There was a microwave over in the common kitchen area.

"No thank you," she responded. "I like it cold." She rubbed at her eyes again.

"Are your eyes okay princess?" I asked, concerned.

"Uh huh," she answered, and took her milk from me and went to sit on the floor. She seemed to be fond of the floor. I made a mental note to make sure I kept it clean from now on.

"Can I watch TV Edwood?" she asked.

"Sure," I answered, making another mental note not to let her stay in front of the TV for too long. I turned on the TV, flipping the channels until I came across a little olive-skinned girl with straight, short black hair and her little monkey. Maddie bounced on her seat and asked me to leave it there. She rubbed her eyes again, and I narrowed mine anxiously. Seeing her settled in, I turned back to my sister, who sat on the sofa, staring at me with an amused smile.

"What?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Nothing. Just…look at you. Who would've thought-"

"Don't you start with that," I interrupted. "Your husband spoke almost the exact same words to me a little while ago, and-" All of a sudden, I remembered Emmett and Jasper. "Shit!" I whispered, "Em and Jazz were helping me look for Maddie! I wonder if-" Just at that moment, they both walked in, looking tired and flustered, and strangely enough, soaked from head to foot. Their eyes grew wide when they spotted Maddie sitting calmly in the middle of the room, drinking her milk and watching TV.

Emmett, jaw set in a tight line and eyes blazing, walked over to me. "Do you realize Jasper and I have just walked a two mile radius around the perimeter of this building looking for Maddie, in a god-damned shit storm to rival the monsoons of Asia no less, and all this time she's been here with you?"

Alice burst out laughing.

"It's not funny!" Jasper hissed. "Look at us! We look like two drowned subway rats!"

"Sorry guys," I apologized. "I should've called you and let you know we'd found her."

"Damn right you should've called!" Jasper grumbled, throwing himself on the small leather couch. Emmett followed

"Uh, do you mind staying off the leather with your wet-" I started, but one glare from both of them shut me up. "Or not," I finished.

"Aww, come here honey," Alice cooed to Jasper. "Alice'll warm you right up."

"Once again, preschoolers present," I said, nodding towards Maddie. Alice chuckled.

"What are you doin' here baby?" Jasper asked Alice. "I thought you were goin' to Madame Tussaud's this morning' to get the place ready for tonight's party."

"Have you been outside?" Alice screeched. Jasper lifted an eyebrow. "Well, obviously you have," she giggled again, "in which case you should know there's no way I can hold that party tonight. Things are bad out there, and they're only supposed to get worse. I was just dropping by to let you all know the party's canceled, and then I was going to head home and make a few hundred phone calls to let everyone else know."

All our eyes turned towards the windows. The wind was howling, the almost black sky dropping buckets of rain on the streets below, and against the windows, sounding like medium sized pebbles against the glass rather than liquid. The windows vibrated from the force of the wind. Alice was right, it was getting worse.

"Hey guys," I began, looking toward my partners, "maybe we should think about sending everyone home at noon. It really is bad out there. We wouldn't want anyone to get stuck out in this later on tonight."

"I think you're right," Emmett agreed easily. "This is shaping up to be a bad one. I'll go down and let Rosie know and then I'll send out an email?" he asked. I nodded. He stood and walked out of my office, leaving a wet trail behind him. I scowled but couldn't very well say anything about it.

"Yeah, I'll go back to my office and change," Jasper said, standing up too.

"I'll come with you and help honey," Alice said in a seductive voice.

"Sounds good," Jasper agreed with a lazy smile.

"Hey, hey, hey," I called out. "None of that during office hours."

Jasper turned around and glared at me, lifting both eyebrows. Aah, I got it.

"Well last time I checked, two wrongs didn't make a right."

Alice smirked. "Relax Edward, I'm just going to start making my phone calls. I can bring up the directory of all my students from here." She narrowed her eyes at me. "Unless you have a problem with my using company resources to make my phone calls." Her look let me know that if I wanted her cooperation in keeping the events of earlier quiet, my answer should be no.

I shook my head.

She smiled sweetly. "No, I didn't think you would. See you in a few. Let me know when Bella comes to pick Maddie up."

They walked out of the office, and in the quiet that followed, I turned back to Maddie.

She lay on the floor, her yellow dress spread out, milk container to her side, as fast asleep as one of the princesses she probably dreamt about. That bittersweet feeling rose up in my chest again, because she looked so beautiful, so peaceful lying there, and at the same time I felt like such an asshole for not having realized she was tired, and for having let her fall asleep on the floor no less.

Another set of Bella's wise words from earlier this morning came back to me.

'_When she has sweets in the morning, they make her super jittery, and then after a while she crashes…'_

Obviously I should've paid closer attention.

I picked up the silver remote and turned off the flat screen hanging on the wall. Other than the insistent rain and wind battering against the windows, complete silence surrounded us. Quietly, I walked over to Maddie and bent down to pick her up. She felt so light in my arms, even lighter than usual. Her little eyes fluttered when I stood up with her, and she smiled slightly. "Edwood," she murmured, before drifting off again.

I smiled. "Shh. Sleep princess," I murmured.

Carrying her carefully so as not to rattle her, I walked over to the small sofa Alice had been sitting on and gently put her down. Just like a small child, she curled into herself and sighed a couple of times. I frowned, quickly removing my suit jacket and covering her with it. Her face seemed to relax even further, and with it, so did my heart.

Carefully sitting down next to her, I took the unique opportunity to watch her while she slept. The small bun she'd been wearing with her tiara had come undone after the morning's adventures, and a few stray locks of hair hung in her face. Gently, I pushed them away without disturbing her. Her tiny hands rested under her cheek, supporting her head, and her pouty mouth hung slightly open, a small trail of drool running slowly down her chin. I chuckled.

**12 noon**

Two soft raps at the door startled me, and I turned around quickly.

"Is she sleeping?" Bella whispered, walking slowly towards us.

I nodded.

She came right over to the sofa and knelt down in front of Maddie, smiling and smoothing away the same insistent strands of hair I'd just pushed away. With the tender smile still in place, she looked over at me.

"How was she?" she whispered.

"She was…wonderful."

"No problems?" she asked through raised eyebrows.

"Nope."

She chuckled quietly. Sighing deeply, she took a look around the office, her eyes growing wide. "Oh my God Edward, what a mess! I'm so sorry," she began.

"Sorry for what?" I asked. "I made this mess."

She pursed her lips at me, unconvinced. Quickly, she stood herself up and walked over to my desk, picking up stray crayons, markers, coloring books, papers, Polly Pocket pieces, etc.

Making sure Maddie was fast asleep and in no danger of falling off the sofa, I quickly stood too and walked over to Bella.

"Bella, stop," I said, taking hold of her hand with mine. The familiar electric current coursed through me, and once again I thought I saw Bella draw in a quick breath. "I'll take care of it," I insisted. "You don't need to clean up." Her eyes met mine, and I thought I saw something there I hadn't seen in a while, since before she left for Washington…

She turned her eyes away. "Of course I have to clean up Edward," she maintained. "Or else it's going to take you the rest of the year to dig yourself out of this." She looked back up at me and flashed me a wide grin. "Trust me, I know."

With her hand still in mine I said, "Okay, fine. But how about we pick up together then?"

There it was again. That something; her eyes softening, no longer the cool, impassive dark eyes they'd become over the past few days, but warm, melting chocolate again.

"Okay," she answered simply.

"Okay," I agreed.

We worked in companionable silence, piling up coloring books, putting crayons and markers back in their respective boxes, organizing papers and drawings and separating them from the files and proposals that had originally occupied my desk. And even though she didn't say much, the awkwardness that had come between us lately couldn't be found. And then, halfway through clearing the mountain that had accumulated on top of my desk, she picked up a paper and stared at it curiously for a long time. Wondering which one of our works of art had caught her attention, I stopped what I was doing and leaned closer to her, stealing a peak at the picture. It was the drawing of the castle, the one I'd almost messed up in my ignorance. But what I hadn't noticed while Maddie had me coloring in the castle in the _correct_ hues, was what she'd drawn in her little four year old way next to the castle; a prince with a mess of bronze hair sticking out from under his crown, holding hands with a princess with long brown hair, and just to the side of them, a tiny little princess, smiling up at them happily. Maddie couldn't spell yet, but obviously someone had been teaching her the basic sounds of letters, because under each person was one initial, E, M and M. Finally, right under the initials was a big, crooked and very red heart with two more letters.

It was obvious who the people were; there was no point in even asking. "What do you think M F stands for?" Bella murmured, referring to the letters inside the heart.

I shook my head. "I have no idea." I looked back up at her. "But I know she wanted to give you that, so you could hang it up in your cubicle."

"Mmm," she responded, keeping her eyes on the drawing. And just as I thought that would be it and she would just return to her straightening up, her eyes moved up to me. They burned with an intensity that almost sent me reeling. "Okay," she whispered.

I smiled crookedly. "Okay."

It took us another half hour to finish cleaning up, and just as we were picking up the last few stray pieces of Polly, Maddie called out, "Mommy!" sitting up quickly on the chair.

"Hi baby!" Bella smiled, walking over to Maddie and picking her up into a big hug. "Did you have fun?"

"Me and Edwood-"

"Edward and I," Bella corrected.

"Edwood and I had so much fun!" she crooned. "We culuhd, we dwew, we played on the computuh, we went outside,-"

I stiffened.

"You went outside?" Bella questioned, looking over to me. I swallowed.

"Uh, yeah. We just ran across the street for-"

"It was so much fun mommy," Maddie cut in, saving me from having to finish my explanation. "Edwood covuhd me with his coat and I didn't get a dwop of watuh on me, but he was so wet. It was so funny!" she giggled.

"Knock, knock!" Alice called out in her sing song voice. She stood by the door with a Cheshire smile on her face. "Bella, I asked Edward to let me know when you got here," – she looked around my office – "but I see he has you cleaning up his office and couldn't be bothered to tell you."

I rolled my eyes. "I was just about to tell her," I lied.

"Yeah, sure you were," she said through pursed lips. "I need your help Bella!" Alice whined, bouncing up and down almost exactly the same way Maddie had been doing a short while ago. No wonder she understood Maddie so well. She was still a toddler herself.

"Sure Alice, what do you need?" Bella asked right away.

"Well obviously tonight's Halloween party's canceled," she mumbled. "I need help contacting everyone and letting them know. I've literally got hundreds of people to call. It'll take me all night by myself!" she whined.

Bella chuckled. "Of course I'll help you make the calls," she offered. "As soon as I get home-"

"No!" Alice groaned. "We have to make them now!" She shot me a dirty look. "Don't worry about the bosses. They've officially canceled the rest of the work day. You're off the clock. Didn't he tell you that either?" she asked, putting her hands on her tiny hips.

"I was about to tell her that too," I hissed.

"Yeah, when? After she'd mopped your floors and dusted your furniture?"

I rolled my eyes and let out a deep breath. The truth was I was trying to work my way up to that, because I really wanted to take her and Maddie home. The weather outside was really bad, and I couldn't even think of the both of them underground in those undependable, dirty trains during this.

"Anyway," Alice continued, turning her eyes back to Bella, "help me Bella please?" she asked, still bouncing. "Rose has already taken a third of the list with her into Emmett's office and is making some calls from there, I'm making some from Jasper's office, will you take a third of the list and-"

"Give me the list and I'll go down to my cubicle and make the calls from there."

Alice gave her a wide grin. "Oh thank you!" she gleamed. "I'll email you the list," she said quickly and ran out of the office before Bella could change her mind. Bella chuckled, still sitting with Maddie and stroking her hair.

"Bella, you don't have to go downstairs to make those calls," I said quietly. She looked over to me and tilted her head to the side.

I cleared my throat. "I mean, you'd have more privacy from here, and Maddie could play around-" – she started biting her lip – a sure sign that I'd said something that took her out of her comfort zone. "I could- I could go and hang out in Jasper or Emmett's office," I said quickly, "I don't have to be here. Everyone's left for the day anyway, there's nothing left for me to do-"

"You don't have to leave Edward," she said softly.

"What?"

"This is your office Edward," she chuckled. "You don't have to leave." She bit on her lip one more time before continuing, watching me carefully. "I would rather stay here. But you don't have to leave," she said slowly.

Was I missing something here? I gave her a quizzical look, and she chuckled again.

"What if," I said, "we take that third of the list and split it up in two-"

"Is this going to be a math question, because that was never my strong point."

I laughed. "No. No math. What I was going to say is you take half of the list Alice is emailing you, and I'll take the other half and call them from my cell phone. We work together and get it done quicker. Okay?"

"Okay."

Okay was quickly becoming my favorite word in the English language.

Apparently, there had been no point in cleaning up the mess in my office, because within a half hour, it looked exactly as it had at eleven o'clock that morning. Maddie cut and colored and played while Bella and I made our phone calls. And every once in a while, okay, every few seconds, I'd glance over at Bella sitting at my desk. And the thing was, whenever I did glance, her eyes would rise to meet mine, and she'd smile softly. And I'd go back to my endless phone calls, hoping we'd never get to the end of the list.

Emmett volunteered, or was volunteered was more like it, to bare the storm and run out for our lunches, running up with a few pizza pies which disappeared quickly. And by two in the afternoon, we were just about at the end of the list. Maddie had gotten bored of my office and I couldn't blame her, she'd spent the last six hours or so in there, so she'd started running back and forth between my office and Jasper's and Emmett's. I'd quietly reminded her to stay where one of us could always see her, and she'd nodded her head, wide-eyed, but had obeyed. When I'd looked up at Bella, she'd given me a quizzical smile but hadn't asked.

While Bella was on her last call of the afternoon, I turned on the TV quietly, looking for information on how the storm was progressing. I was running out of time. I had to work up the nerve to ask Bella to let me take her home. But looking out the window, I knew I wasn't taking 'no' for an answer. Luckily, the New York City MTA gods appeared to be on my side.

"…_the subway system has come to an almost complete halt. We haven't seen delays like this on the city's transit since the blizzard of '96. Flooding has taken almost half of the train lines out of commission,"_ the news reporter stated with in an alarming voice. I smirked; while the information she was conveying was definitely alarming, she could've been reporting on a bunny being run over and still would've made it sound like the apocalypse. I did feel a twinge of pity for her though; trying to report her story while wrapped in a black trench that was doing no good in keeping her dry, fighting a losing battle with her umbrella, and struggling to keep her feet on the ground and not get blown away across the river to Jersey.

Bella finished her last call and with the phone still in the air, paused to listen to the rest of the news story.

"…_New York City busses are running on an extremely delayed schedule." _The reporter turned to a young teenage boy; his face almost completely covered by his soaked hoodie. With a solemn expression, she asked,

"_How long did you say you've been waiting for you bus?"_

"_I've been out here for two damn hours man!" _The young boy complained. "_This crap is ill man! Yo, I pay mah taxes,"_ he said, pounding on his chest, _"I pay mah dues and this city can't even provide me with transportation when I need it? Yo, that's messed up!"_ he finished, shaking his head from side to side.

The news reporter shook her head along with him. _"That is just horrible_," she tsked with a horrified expression. I snorted; if she was so horrified maybe she should offer to give him a ride to wherever he was headed.

"_This is Maria de los Santos Vasquez Rodriguez Montalvo, reporting from City Hall." _A large gust of wind almost knocked her down, and as she righted herself, she scowled into the camera and said begrudgingly, "_Rick, back to you in the newsroom."_

I shut the TV off.

Bella sat at my desk, wide-eyed and thoughtful. Gnawing on the inside of her lip, she stood up and walked to the windows. I followed, stopping just behind her. Inhaling deeply, I breathed in the sweet scent of her; strawberries and soap and something else, soft and warm, something distinctly Bella.

"Looks like things are really as mess out there," she murmured.

Steeling myself for a fight, I gently placed a hand on her shoulder. "Bella, I'm going to take you and Maddie home," I whispered firmly. "Things aren't safe out there right now. You can fight me all you want, but…"

She turned around; her gaze focused straight ahead. I held her tighter, swallowing thickly when she moved in closer to me. Her eyes trailed up slowly, leaving a burning path wherever they landed; my collarbone, my neck, my chin. She paused at my lips before finally meeting my eyes. A flash of heat coursed through my body, because the last time I'd seen that intense look in her eyes, we'd been standing in a little corner at JFK.

"I _can't_ fight this anymore, can I?" she asked, her brown eyes smoldering. I got the feeling we weren't talking about my taking her home.

"Do you want to fight it?"

"No."

"Then don't."

I reached out carefully and took her hand in mine, waiting to see if she'd try to pull it away like the other night. But she curled her fingers around mine; my breath caught in my throat. I let my other hand trace slowly from her shoulder to the nape of her warm neck, exhilarated by the scorching fire my touch seemed to incite in her, based on how heavy and hooded her eyes became. I moved my thumb slowly around in soothing circles; her shudder encouraged me even more. I let my eyes fall to her mouth, so soft and sweet in my memories. It felt like forever since I'd tasted them that day at the airport.

Bella had apparently noticed the direction my eyes traveled in. She licked her lips, anticipating my next move. Slowly, giving her every chance to pull away, to change her mind, to slap me, I moved in closer, using my hand on her neck to pull her in. I kept my eyes open, flashing them quickly from her eyes to her lips and then back up again, still afraid I was reading the signals wrong. But she wasn't resisting. She was inching her mouth closer to mine; her eyes dark and hooded. Just before my mouth descended on hers, she closed her eyes, her long eyelashes fluttering softly. I closed my eyes and gently pressed my lips to hers.

Nature guided me the rest of the way; because kissing Bella was nothing short of instinctive; second-nature, rooted to my survival instincts. Her lips molded to mine, or maybe mine molded to hers. It didn't matter either way. All that mattered were the electric sparks, the searing heat traveling up and down my spine at the feel of her soft, warm lips moving in perfect sync with mine, as if we'd done this a million times before, as if they'd been made for each other. I was starting to suspect that maybe that was exactly the case, because never had a pair of lips fit so perfectly against me. Her mouth was soft yet insistent as she pulled my top lip in between hers while I worked on her bottom lip. Her warm tongue grazed my mouth, eliciting a low moan from me. My grip around the nape of her neck grew firmer, as did other parts of my anatomy. This time, unlike at the airport, I pulled her in closer and let my tongue explore hers lips, licking their warmth, their wetness, reveling in the deliciousness of her mouth. She parted her lips wider, giving my tongue access to hers, and when they met, the electric sparks ignited a new fire in me, a desire deeper than I'd ever felt before. A soft moan escaped her, proof that she was enjoying this as much as I was, and flaming the fire burning inside.

"Bella," I murmured, tightening my grip on her. The tempo of our kisses increased, the desperation and need growing, searching for a-

The sound of little footsteps running in our direction doused us off faster than a bucket of cold ice-water. We broke away quickly, Bella wiping at her lips and me turning around to adjust myself privately. My heart felt like it would beat out of my chest, and when I glanced up at Bella she shot me a happy smile that I returned with a crooked grin, like a god-damned cat that had just made out with the most perfect canary in the world. Her cheeks flushed beautifully, making me want to kiss her again. And again. And again.

Maddie bounded in happily. "Mommy, Edwood, Ally and Rosie are done with theuh phone calls. Are you? Can we go home now?"

Bella walked over to Maddie, leaning down to her eye level. "Maddie, how would you like for Edward to have dinner with us, at our home?" I smiled widely.

Maddie gasped with excitement. "Can he?" she asked Bella.

"I don't know," Bella responded. "Why don't you ask him?" she said, turning to smile at me coyly.

"Oh peez Edwood! Peez, Peez, Peez," Maddie squealed. As if there was any chance in this world that I'd say no.

"Okay," I answered simply.

"Okay," Bella repeated.

I drew in a deep breath, exhaling in quiet relief. "Okay."

* * *

**A/N: Kissing in the office? Hmm. Well, everyone's gone home and the work day is done, so…**

**FYI for all those who don't live in the North East U.S., a Nor'Easter is a storm we generally get in the winter months, packing strong winds, heavy rains, or depending on the time of year, lots and lots of snow. NYC transit, as special as it is, tends to break down, flooding occurs in the subways and busses and traffic come to a crawling halt. Yeah, we're big softies in the mid-Atlantic states. **

**Oh, and I took a couple of cracks at NJ and Jersey housewives in this chapter. No offense to those from NJ. I live there! It's all in good fun.**

**Anyone have any ideas on what Maddie was trying to spell with M F? Let me know. Reviews make the updates come quicker. Thanks!**

**And the storm continues next time!**


	16. Chapter 15 Dinner with Friends

**A/N: Sorry guys. It's been a couple of weeks, I know. But here we are, and just so you know, the next one's being Beta'd and will be up SOON!**

**Danna0724 beta'd this superquick, as usual, even while high on Nyquil! Love you lots girlie!**

**All characters belong to S. Meyer; I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a while.**

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**Ch. 15 Dinner with Friends**

_**Chapter Song Rec: Hanging by a Moment, by Lifehouse**_

**BPOV**

_**Twenty-two years earlier**_

_I'm about four years old and fast asleep on my father's living room couch, dead-tired after a long day of fishing with him and Billy on one or the other's boat. It was the summer, and my mom hadn't wasted any time in shipping me off to Charlie for a few weeks. The fact that I probably hated every second on that boat no doubt added to my exhaustion, and I suspect so did the third degree sun burns on every exposed part of my body. So I was lying across the couch, dead to the world, and dreaming of whatever it is that four year olds dream of - blue cotton candy, white sparkly unicorns, dancing Barbies, whatever. _

_But that's not what I remember. Not falling asleep, or what I dreamt of, or even the warm spit accumulating on the edges of my jaw. I just figured that must've been the preamble to my memory. What I could remember, what made this memory stick out in my mind, was the image of Charlie gazing down at me - wide-eyed and with a tender smile - when I woke up._

_I remember rubbing the sleep out of my tired, puffy eyes and wondering why my dad was just sitting there next to me, doing absolutely nothing but staring. I'd been momentarily frightened that I'd done something wrong. Not that Charlie ever scolded me. But still, it was the only reason I could think of why he'd just be sitting there watching me so intently._

"_Hi dad," I remember saying timidly. "What are you doing?"_

"_Oh nothing," he answered, his brown eyes filing me with warmth and a sense of belonging I only felt with him. "Just watching you sleep. Did you have a nice nap?"_

"_Uh huh," I answered, wrinkling my brow. "How come you're watching me sleep?"_

_Charlie chuckled; a throaty laugh that came right from his then-flat belly. It made the short whiskers over his top lip vibrate. I wanted to reach out and touch them._

"_Well, Bells," he said, "I don't get a whole bunch'a time with you, so I figure I might as well take advantage of every moment I've got. Time's a'passing even while you're napping."_

_I had no idea what he meant, but I remember thinking that watching someone sleep sure sounded boring. _

"_Can I go outside and play now?" I asked, sitting up to let him know nap-and-stare time was officially over. _

_He chuckled again. "Sure Bells. Billy and his family are outside. I'll be out there in a minute. Just be careful running. You don't wanna scrape up your other knee now."_

_I looked down at my bandaged knee, cringing. No, I sure didn't want another one of those._

"_And play nice with baby Jake," my dad added more firmly._

"_But dad he's always following me around," I remember whining. "I'm a big girl. I don't want to play with babies!" _

"_Now be nice," Charlie said again. He took me by the arm and sat me on his knee, his mustache twitching in amusement. "He's the closest thing you've got to a brother and someday he's going to take care of you."_

_I wrinkled my nose and wondered how in the world that diaper-pooping cry baby was ever going to take care of me? My dad laughed at the expression on my face._

"_Go on Bells. I'll be out there in a little while." I jumped off his leg and stumbled out the back door._

_**Eighteen years later**_

_Gazing down at her tiny porcelain face, it all made sense now, why I'd sometimes turn around while doing the dishes and catch Charlie just staring at me, why he'd change the tires on my old truck without my having asked him to, and why he'd watch me sleep._

_As Maddie lay in her crib with her little eyes closed and her pouty lips sucking in and blowing out air softly, I just stood there, holding on to the wood railings and watching her in rapt amazement. My daughter. My baby. _

_Her soft fuzzy pink blanket swaddled her gently, keeping her wrapped tight and warm, the way she'd been inside my womb. I'd read in one of my many pregnancy books before she'd been born that this was how babies liked to sleep, snuggled and safe, and apparently it was true, because Maddie was such a good sleeper. So good in fact that, even though the doctor had told me not to, I'd wake her up sometimes during her naps if I thought she'd slept too long. I needed to see her little chocolate eyes open and aware, gazing curiously at me and the world. And besides, she needed to eat regularly if I was going to keep my milk up. That, especially, would be tricky in the next few weeks, since I'd be going back to work sooner than I'd originally expected. I sighed, wishing I could've stayed with her longer, but we needed the money._

_I'd been singing to her, humming one of the lullabies I'd learned in the past few weeks, the one about sunshine and happiness, and chasing away grey skies, when I heard him approach behind me._

"_You staring at that kid again while she sleeps? Jesus Christ Bella, don't you have better things to do? It's not like she's gonna get up and crawl outta that crib or do anything interesting. All she does all day is eat and crap," he cracked mockingly._

_I stiffened, the weakened muscles in my stomach contracting painfully. Without turning around to face him I answered,_

"_No, actually Paul, I don't have anything better to do than stare at my six-week old daughter. __**I **__could stare at her all day. __**One **__of her parents has to show her some attention."_

_I heard the springs on our bed recoil and then pop back up, and knew he'd flung himself on it. I closed my eyes and exhaled. _

"_Whatever," he answered dryly. "Ever since that kid was born, this place has been a god-damned disaster area. Diapers and blankets and your freakin' milk machine everywhere. God forbid I find any of my shit under all of you and that kid's junk."_

_I cringed. Every time he called Maddie 'that kid' it was like a sharp knife being dug deep in my chest. _

"_If you're so bothered by the mess Paul, why don't you put those two hands God gave you to good use for a change and help me out around here? I mean, it's not like you have a job or anything to distract you."_

"_Not my god-damned mess, no reason why I need to pick it up," he answered dryly, completely ignoring my comment about his lack of a job. _

_He was silent for a while after that. I kept my back to him, gazing down at Maddie and fighting the tears at the corners of my eyes. I fought the memories of all the promises he'd made me – lying in bed at night, twisted in each other's bodies – when he'd promised me the world if I gave him a child. He'd lied. But it couldn't make me regret the little miracle that lay fast asleep in her crib._

"_So…how was the doctor's appointment?" Paul suddenly asked. I raised my eyebrows, surprised he'd even remembered that._

"_Fine," I answered slowly, suspiciously. "The doctor said everything's fine."_

"_Good," he replied, and I could hear the smile in it. I frowned._

"_So…I guess you're clear then?" he asked._

_Now I turned around to face him. He was lying down on his side of the bed, his hands behind his head, propping it up. In another lifetime the picture he made laying carelessly across our bed, the muscles in his arms tight and protruding, his fitted t-shirt riding up over his perfectly sculpted stomach and his jeans low on his hips, a come-hither smile spread across his undeniably handsome face, would've raised a thousand and one butterflies in my stomach. _

"_Clear for what exactly?" I asked, arching an eyebrow and crossing my arms in front of me. _

_He smiled the smile that used to melt my insides. The one that in that aforementioned lifetime would've made me leap tall buildings in a single bound._

"_Clear to perform your wifely duties," he said, wriggling his eyebrows and removing one arm from under his head to pat the empty space next to him on the bed. _

_I snorted in disbelief, shaking my head. Taking in a deep breath I turned away from him. "Paul, I'm not having sex with you."_

_I heard him exhale loudly behind me. The seductive voice disappeared and in its place was the cold, uncaring tone I'd come to know from him in the past few months. "Why not?" he asked coolly, as if he really had no idea._

"_Why not?" I asked incredulously, whipping my head back around to face him. "Why not?" I repeated. "How about because I'm exhausted as all hell. How about because you don't do a thing to help me out with the baby, or with this place. How about because you disappear so much that I have no idea what or __**who**__ you're doing, and I'm not about to expose myself or my baby to-"_

"_The baby, the baby, the baby!" he hissed, sitting up, all sweet pretense for the sake of getting lucky completely gone. "That's all you ever fucking think about!"_

"_Somebody has to think about her since you obviously don't!"_

"_I've got enough shit on my mind, I don't have time to fill my head with fuzzy little baby thoughts the way you do! You sit around this god-damned apartment all day doing nothing but changing and feeding and staring at that kid, while I'm out trying to get a job to support us! That's where I disappear to!"_

_Maddie started crying. The only times she ever cried were when she was hungry or needed a changing, or when she'd hear Paul's voice. It'd be funny if it wasn't so damned sad. I turned back towards her and gently lowered my arms to her sides, picking her up and holding her close to me while she continued whimpering and fussing. I bounced her gently to soothe her, cooing while her fussing quieted down._

"_She's six-weeks old today Paul," I hissed, shooting my eyes back up to Paul. "In those six weeks you haven't held her once! Not once!"_

_He let air out through his teeth and rolled his eyes in a 'here she goes again' sort of way._

_I swallowed thickly and asked, "Why did you tell me you wanted a baby? Why'd you beg me for months and months, when you obviously didn't want one?"_

_He stared at me, his face cool and impassive. No answer. It was as good a time as any to give him my news._

"_I'm going back to work on Monday."_

_He continued staring at me for a long time, until I started thinking maybe he hadn't heard me after all. I was about to repeat myself when he narrowed his eyes and uttered one simple word._

"_Where?"_

"_At the garage."_

"_Of course."_

_I ignored all the implications those two words carried with it. "We need the money Paul. We've gone through most of the money I saved while I was pregnant, and the baby needs-"_

"_Jakey boy must have a major stiffy just thinking about having you so close to him again," he said with a wry grin._

"_Don't be so disgusting!" I hissed. "Jake told me he'd told Jared to tell you that you could have your job back! He was willing to put everything behind him because he knows we've got a family to support, but you turned it down! That's how hard you've been working at trying to support us, huh? Here's a tip Paul, you might want to try looking for a job somewhere other than the local bar. I don't think you'll find too many potential employers looking for recruits in there." _

"_Fucking people in this town have big mouths," was all he muttered._

"_You certainly provide them with enough fodder," I accused. "Between all the crap you pull and the lies about-"I stopped, unable to even finish that sentence._

_Paul looked at me and smiled cruelly, his coal black eyes glinting in amusement, guessing what I'd been about to say but was too ashamed to even utter aloud. "Aw, relax baby," he said in a taunting voice, lowering himself back on the bed and resting his head carelessly against his arms. "What do you care what people in this fucking little hick town think anyway? I sure as hell don't."_

"_That's pretty obvious." I took a deep breath. "Why don't you speak to Jake? I'm sure if you-"_

_Paul's eyes hardened to blackened coal. He glared at me. "I wouldn't work for Jake if we were all at the brink of starvation and it was the last job left in hell."_

_I gasped in horror, stroking Maddie's soft fuzzy head to comfort her, as if she could understand what her father had just said. Paul's eyes followed my hand. _

"_And who the hell is supposed to watch the kid while you're out bringing home the bacon? I know you don't think I'm gonna do it."_

_My nostrils flared. "She's your daughter Paul! She's as much your responsibility as she is mine! What is __**wrong**__ with you?" I yelled, tears stinging at the corners of my eyes. I cradled Maddie gently, covering her ears carefully. But maybe if I yelled loud enough, something in him would crack and he'd finally get it._

"_I'm not a god-damned babysitter! I'm not watching that kid-"_

_I put a hand out to stop him, giving up. "I had a feeling that'd be your answer." I paused. "My dad's offered to watch Maddie when he can, and since Jessica still hasn't found a job either, she's offered to watch her when she can too. Between the both of them-"_

"_Jessica's gonna watch the kid?" he interrupted me._

"_Yes. Why?"_

_He lifted an eyebrow and shook his head. "No reason. Just asking is all."_

_Something uncomfortable fluttered in the pit of my stomach, but before I could examine it further, Paul asked,_

"_What about the truck?"_

"_What about it?"_

"_I need it to get around town!" he complained._

"_Well I need it to get to work! Now if you want to drive me there and pick me up-"_

"_Now I don't just look like a babysitter, I look like a fucking chauffeur too? No way."_

"_Well, I don't know what to tell you. Get Jared or Collin to pick you up. I need the truck. If you would've kept up the payments on your car-"_

_The door bell rang. "That's Jessica. She's going to hang out here for a while so she can get the hang of taking care of Maddie."_

_He grinned; a lop-sided grin that once again attacked my stomach. "By all means, let's not keep Jessica away from her duties."_

**Present Day**

"You okay?" Edward asked me with a nervous smile, glancing at me sideways from his side on the driver's seat of his new Volvo. A Volvo equipped with a built-in car seat in the back and a DVD player, which was at the moment featuring Maddie's Princess-du-jour. "She'll be safe now," was all he'd uttered sheepishly as I'd stared at him in amazement. I hadn't known whether to be overjoyed or overwhelmed, so I'd compromised with myself and been more than a little of both.

My answering smile was at least as nervous as his, and not very convincing. "I'm fine," I lied.

He glanced at me again, his smile faltering as he saw through the lie.

"I…was just thinking, remembering some stuff," I said quickly, not wanting him to think any of the confusion I was feeling amounted to regret over being here with him, or over what had happened a little while ago when I'd given in to the overwhelming need for him, to the magnetic pull between us. A little over half an hour ago, Edward's hand had been twisted tightly into the hair on the nape of my neck in the most delicious way, his mouth covering mine completely, insistently…

Edward glanced in the rearview mirror again and smiled tenderly, watching Maddie. He turned his eyes back to me quickly before turning back to the road. "What were you remembering?"

I swallowed and shrugged. "Some good things, some not so good."

"Hmm," he murmured, keeping his eyes on the road. "Do me a favor?" he asked quietly. "I can see the wheels turning in that pretty brunette head of yours." I smiled guiltily and looked down at my lap. "Don't think too hard please? You make me nervous when you think hard." Without taking his eyes off of the windshield currently being pummeled by a downpour and hurricane-level winds, he reached across and took my hand, lacing his fingers with mine. "Let's enjoy this. We can do the hard thinking later."

I chuckled unevenly. "I'll try, but I can't make you any promises."

The truth was, there were still so many questions unanswered between Edward and me. Questions I had, and questions I was sure he'd have. Like where exactly did things stand between him and Tanya? I cringed internally as I remembered the pictures and headline in last week's Page Six. Deep inside, I knew there had to be a reasonable explanation. I'd known it, felt it, the day we spoke in Alice's office. I'd seen in his face how desperate he was to explain things to me. But if I asked, what would he answer? _'It was a mistake? It wasn't what it looked like?'_ I wasn't sure I could handle hearing those lines again, not from him.

And Lauren. Why had he wanted Rosalie to put Lauren back on the EverSoft account? Did he really think she'd be better at managing it than I would? I'd meant it when I'd told him last week that I could understand if he felt that way, and theoretically, I _could_. But realistically? No way. It didn't make sense. It didn't add up unless he'd had another reason-

In a quick movement, Edward let go of my hand and touched a finger to my bottom lip, releasing it from where it'd been trapped between my teeth and sending a surge of heat from the crown of my head to the tips of my toes.

He grinned at me sideways before re-slipping his hand into mine. "You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"Messing with that lip there," he said calmly. He glanced in the mirror to check our level of privacy and then gave me a quick wink. "If I'm not mistaken, isn't that my job now?" he asked in a low voice.

My stomach did a summersault and back flip to rival those of Shawn Johnson. I took a deep breath.

"Edward, I've got…we need to talk."

He breathed in deeply. "I know we do. And we will." He glanced over at me, nervous again. "Just remember, I'm not perfect."

I nodded anxiously. "I'll remember that as long as you promise to remember that lack of perfection goes both ways."

He glanced over at me and seeing my anxious smile, tightened his grip. The overwhelming sense of peace I always felt when he did that was indescribable.

"I'm afraid _that_ is something I can't promise," he said.

"Then I'm afraid you'll be sorely disappointed."

He shook his head and for an instant, he let his head turn in my direction. Our eyes met and he smiled softly and brought our hands to his lips, placing a warm kiss on the back of my hand.

"You could never disappoint me."

We rode the rest of the way with our hands intertwined in between us.

Ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo

Apparently the City of New York and its inhabitants are lightweights when it comes to somewhat severe storms. What we in Washington consider Friday afternoon, NYC sees as a reason to shut the city down, transit systems come to a standstill, panic and mayhem rule the streets, there's a run for every gallon of milk in the city, and gridlock materializes for no apparent reason on every major corner from Broadway down to the Brooklyn Bridge.

So it was over two hours later when we dripped into the apartment, laughing and giggling through our soaked faces and bodies. Despite Edward's efforts at keeping us dry by throwing his long rain-coat over us and huddling us tightly to him, the three of us looked like a family of drowned ducks by the time we made it through the doors.

"That was fun! Can we do it again?" Maddie asked.

Edward laughed. He picked Maddie up and swung her over his shoulder, carrying her to the living room couch and pretending to throw her down before attacking her extremely ticklish sides.

"Do that again?" he asked over her fits of laughter. "You, Madisen Grace Swan, are the most inexhaustible little princess I've ever met in my life!"

"Stop Edwood! Stop!" she begged unconvincingly, giggling harder than I'd heard her do in months. Peeling of my wet coat, I watched them, feeling a bittersweet tug at my heart and wondering how to respond to this man before me, on the surface so seemingly similar to another man I'd known, yet so different…

"Edward, just make yourself comfortable while Maddie and I go get changed okay?" I noticed then how wet his suit had gotten while he'd tried to keep most of the rain off of us with his raincoat. "You've got a t-shirt or something on under your suit right?"

He nodded, smiling curiously.

"Why don't you take off your jacket and shirt and put them on the radiator to dry up a bit?"

"Sure, thanks," he said, and started pulling off his wet suit jacket.

In my bedroom, I peeled off Maddie's wet princess dress and tights and undergarments, dressing her in warm sweats. She wriggled impatiently, anxious to get back out to Edward. As soon as she was done, she took off running.

"Behave!" I called out after her. In a couple of seconds, I heard her squeals of happiness again, and Edward's loud laughter. With a nervous sigh, I turned into my closet.

Normally, I would've just thrown on a pair of sweats myself, not bothering to care whether they matched, whether they were holey, whether the top had permanent marker stains on it from the time when Maddie wanted to draw butterflies and couldn't find her washable markers _or_ paper. But tonight was different. Stripped down to my underwear, I threw out sweats after sweats from my closet, holding them up against me in front of the full-length mirror attached to my closet door; too tight, too loose, too ratty, too new-and-I'm-trying-too-hard-to-look-good looking.

"Mommy I'm hungwy!" Maddie sang out from the living room.

"I'm coming!" I called back. Giving up, I threw on the cleanest pair of sweats I could find and a plain white tee. Tying my hair back in a careless pony-tail, I ran out of my bedroom.

I walked over to the kitchen, where I heard there voices coming from. Maddie sat at the small table she and I shared for our meals, drinking a cup of milk and munching on a banana, while Edward stood behind her, his arms crossed and leaning patiently against the kitchen counter. My eyes almost bulged out of their sockets at the sight of Adonis in a fitted tank top that did nothing but magnify the perfectly sculpted body under it. Holy biceps and triceps and whatever-ceps, Edward was ripped! Talk about Superman in disguise! Those abs – the abs under that tank appeared to have been chiseled out of marble. I bit my lip and forced myself to look away from his distracting body and at his face instead - in and of itself a big distraction. Jesus, I was in trouble. It had really been too long since I'd had a man other than my dad or Jake in such little clothing in front of me. Which was sad considering Edward was fully clothed.

And for some unexplainable reason, Edward was gawking at me as if something about my appearance was distracting him. His eyes traveled up and down, taking in my loose sweats and tee that had at some point shrunk in the wash. I hadn't realized how fitted it was. I pulled down on it self-consciously, watching as Edward carefully composed his features.

He swallowed. "I've never seen you like this, looking so…comfy."

Was that a good thing or a bad thing? I could feel my cheeks flushing.

He cleared his throat nervously and looked away. His eyes went to Maddie. "Hope you don't mind I gave Maddie something to eat," he said, giving me an apologetic smile. "She said she was hungry."

Flushing a deeper shade of red and thoroughly embarrassed that I'd been checking Edward out while my daughter sat starving, I opened the fridge and started quickly pulling out what I'd need for tonight's dinner.

"I'm sorry guys," I apologized profusely. "I'll get dinner going right away."

Edward came up behind me, his warm breath raising goose bumps on the exposed flesh under my pony tail. His hands came lightly to my waist. "Everything okay?" he murmured, his breath tickling my neck.

I turned to face him, a pack of chicken cutlets and a bunch of veggies balanced precariously in my arms. The ends of his mouth turned up in a grin and he reached up and took the food from me. "You don't have to rush. I took care of Maddie; no one's starving," he chuckled, amused.

I was suddenly hit by a snag of an old memory, another instance involving the concepts of Maddie and starving, except that context had been so different…

"What are we doing with these?" Edward asked, holding up the unprepared food and snapping me out of my fuzzy thoughts.

I arched an eyebrow. "We?"

He arched his own eyebrow in return. "Unless you have a problem with my helping?"

"No. I'm just…surprised." He smirked, raising both eyebrows. "You don't strike me as the cooking type," I clarified.

"Well, I'm no Emeril or anything, but yes, I can cook."

"Can you now?" I asked coyly, suddenly feeling more light and flirty than I had in a long time.

Edward jerked his head back slightly, apparently as surprised by my teasing tone as I was. With a mischievous grin, he leaned in close, skimming his nose against the side of my face and bringing his lips to my ear. "Oh I can heat things up pretty well." I swallowed thickly, feeling a burst of heat radiating across my chest. Did I understand that properly? Edward chuckled lowly in my ear.

"Bella, breathe," he whispered, before pulling back to look at me. He was right, I had been holding my breath. Inhaling and exhaling deeply I let my eyes meet his. Yes, I had understood correctly, and he was purposely trying to get me flustered.

"Heating things up and cooking aren't exactly the same thing," I said with a smirk.

He moved his lips back to my ear, this time nipping lightly on my earlobe before whispering, "I can cook too Bella." The fine little hairs on the nape of my neck stood on end.

Holding out one hand in front of me, I gently nudged him away. I'd never get dinner ready this way. He chuckled again as I snatched the chicken out of his hands and jerked my head towards the counter. "Well then Chef Cullen, since you're so talented, why don't you take those veggies there, grab that chopping block, and get to work?"

Holding all his items easily in one arm, he pretended to salute me. "Yes ma'am."

A sweet little voice from just behind Edward reminded us we had an audience. "Mommy, can I help too?" Maddie asked.

"Hey Maddie, you want to be my sous chef?" Edward asked her, setting the veggies down on the counter.

Maddie frowned. "No, I want to be _your_ chef."

Edward gave her a quizzical look before turning to me for an explanation.

"She thinks you mean sous as in Sue, her babysitter," I explained. "She thinks you're asking her if she wants to be Sue's chef."

I could tell Edward wanted to burst out laughing, but he held it in and turned to Maddie again. "Princess, sous chef means my helper. How about it? Do you want to be my helper?"

"Shooah!" she said, jumping out of her chair and running to Edward's side. He picked her up and sat her on the counter next to him.

"What do I do?" she asked him, wide-eyed. He opened the faucet, letting the water run cold.

"Here. I'll hand you the veggies, and you run them under the water and wash them really well for me, okay?"

"Okay," she answered seriously, as if he'd just asked her to assist in open heart surgery.

He chuckled and tapped her nose gently before turning to his work.

Edward wasn't joking about knowing his way around a kitchen. He didn't even ask where the chopping knife was. He simply opened a couple of drawers before coming to the right one, pulled out the knife he needed, and proceeded to chop everything quickly and uniformly - the muscles in his forearms flexing and protruding with his quick movements - while I tried to cut and sautée the chicken cutlets without hurting myself due to my state of distraction.

"Where'd you learn to cook?" I asked curiously, still surprised by his easiness around the kitchen.

He shrugged, while the knife moved up and down quickly and confidently in his hands. "Esme made it a point to make sure Emmett, Alice and I knew how to take care of ourselves, and that included things like cooking and cleaning, ironing. Said she wasn't going to let Emmett and me slide from domestic duties just because we were men," he rolled his eyes, turning one half of his mouth up. "I don't want to brag or anything, but Emmett and Alice got nothing on my lasagna. And I can iron one mean crease into the front of the most stubborn slacks." He glanced up at me. "Uhm, you might want to move that chicken around a bit," he added, lifting the knife off the board and pointing it towards the chicken while making a circular motion with it."

"What? Oh," I stuttered, shaking myself out of my stupor enough to stir the sautéing chicken before it stuck to the pan.

"Not used to a man that can cook?" he asked with a crooked grin, turning back to his chopping.

"No," I chuckled honestly. "My dad blew up the microwave once with nothing more than a jar of pasta sauce. And Jake, I'm not sure Jake can boil water without a detailed recipe," I snickered.

Edward kept his eyes on the cutting board. "You cook a lot for your dad…and Jake?"

"For my dad yes, and for Jake, well, he's been around a lot for the past couple of years, so I suppose lately…" I suddenly wished I hadn't started this conversation.

Edward was silent, the sound of the knife coming up and down on the chopping block suddenly became more persistent. He seemed to be going for minced rather than just chopped now.

"So," he set the knife down and lowered Maddie carefully from the counter, walking over to me and peeking into the pan. "What exactly are we making tonight?"

"Chicken tacos?" I said, feeling more self-conscious about my menu choice now that I knew his level of expertise in the kitchen. But it was late and chicken tacos was a quick meal. "I would've made something nicer, but it's pretty late and-"

"Chicken tacos are one of my all time favorites," he stressed, his green eyes dancing and putting me at ease again. "How about you princess?" he asked, holding Maddie's hand over the cheese grater and making sure she didn't shred her fingers instead of the cheese. "What do you think about chicken tacos?"

"I like putting lots and lots of cheese on mine," she said by way of answer.

"She likes everything with lots of cheese," I confirmed.

"A princess after my own heart," he smiled down at her affectionately. "Adding cheese to everything would solve every problem in this world."

We laughed together while Maddie looked from one to the other quizzically.

The rest of the dinner prep went off surprisingly smoothly and comfortably. It felt as if Edward had always been here with Maddie and me, always answering Maddie's continuous questions patiently; where does the water go to after it runs down the drain, why are tomatoes red and lettuce green instead of pink. We moved so easily together too, almost in sync as I removed the chicken from the pan and he added the onions and peppers, sautéing them while I pulled out the taco shells from the oven and the rest of the condiments from the fridge. And then when everything was ready he cleaned Maddie up and sat her at the table before helping me bring the food over. It was so easy, so effortless, almost as if he was…home.

Regardless of Edward's assurances to the contrary, we _had_ all actually been starving, and the three of us thoroughly inhaled and enjoyed our dinner. Almost before we knew it, our plates were empty and Edward and Maddie had together finished every last shred of cheese on the table. And while I couldn't remember having enjoyed a dinner more, I honestly couldn't help wondering when and if Edward and I would have time to ourselves tonight before the evening ended. Maddie was enjoying the novelty of having Edward over so much that she barely left his side for a second, helping us clear the table after dinner, loading the dishwasher with Edward while I put things away in the fridge and cleaned up, smiling and giggling up at him happily and, God bless him, Edward seemed just as thrilled to be with her.

"Mommy I gotta go potty," Maddie called out suddenly, dropping the dish she'd been loading into the dishwasher with a little clink and running off for the bathroom. Edward watched her scurry away with a smile. I turned to look after her too, and then chuckling once, turned back to the put the sour cream and salsa back in the fridge.

Strong, warm arms encircled my waist from behind, a soft warm kiss landing on my neck, just below my ear. I almost dropped the jar of salsa as I blindly found any empty spot for it in the fridge. His lips moved up my neck, sucking on my earlobe, his warm breath tickling just inside my ear. My legs weakened.

Edward chuckled. "Is this okay? Am I bothering you?" he whispered in my ear.

"Mmhmm," I responded weakly.

He chuckled again. "Mmhmm okay, or mmhmm I'm bothering you?" he asked, his lips trailing up and down my neck softly, leaving little kisses here and there.

"Mmhmm okay," I barely managed to murmur, cringing internally at my inability to utter a real word. His hands moved just under my short t-shirt, splayed out on my exposed skin. A thousand little electric pins pricked me all over, sending a burst of heat radiating throughout my body.

"Dinner was delicious, thank you," he murmured, moving the top of my shirt over with his lips and planting two soft kisses on my shoulder. "But if I've gotta be honest, this is what I've been dreaming about all evening, holding you like this." He moved in slightly closer, and I could just feel his body behind me now-

The toilet flushed and quickly I disentangled myself from him, moving away and picking up a rag to clean the already-clean table quickly. Maddie bounded back into the kitchen, rushing once again to Edward's side. And Edward switched his attention back to her effortlessly, as if she'd never left.

But _my_ mind wasn't as easily distracted as I wondered if we'd ever get to pick up where we'd left off. This was new to me, strange even, trying to find a way to make time alone with a man, and I wasn't sure how to go about it.

The phone rang just as I was washing my hands off, getting ready to join Edward and Maddie in the living room. Quickly drying them off on a paper towel, I pressed down on the TALK button while at the same time scanning the caller ID. I recognized the 360 area code followed by the familiar seven digits right away.

"Hey," I said, shooting a quick glance at Edward and Maddie, who were playing around on the living room floor.

"Hey yourself," Jake answered. "According to TWC, you East Coasters are getting pounded right now by some shit called a Nor'Easter?"

I chuckled nervously. "Yeah, it's just your typical storm but apparently it's a big deal in these parts of the woods."

Jake laughed. "Well, I thought I'd check in and make sure you and Maddie weren't floating away with the Statue of Liberty or something."

"No. We're fine." I stole another glance towards the living room. Edward was talking to Maddie, but his eyes had trailed over to me. "Everything okay up there?" I asked Jake, turning towards the sink again.

"Sure, sure. What are you guys up to?"

"Oh, not much. We just finished dinner."

"Isn't it late for you guys over there?"

"Yeah, but…we had a hard time getting home."

Just then, Maddie let out a loud squeal of laughter, and I turned around and saw that Edward was tickling her again.

"Sounds like Maddie's having fun," Jake chuckled. "What's she laughing about so hard?"

Before I could answer, Maddie, still giggling wildly, ran into the kitchen, pretending to hide behind me. "Hewp me mommy, hewp me! Edwood's the tick-oh monstuh!" she squealed. But Edward didn't follow her; he remained on his knees on the living room floor, grinning widely at her before letting his eyes come back up to mine.

"Edwood come get me!" Maddie yelled out loudly, still clinging to my pants.

"Edward?" Jake asked, having heard Maddie's cries. "The little fairy boy's there?"

"Uh, he's not exactly a-"

"Mommy, who are you talking to?" Maddie asked, switching her attention to the phone in my hand.

"Are he and Maddie twirling around together in their tutus, is that what all that commotion's about?" Jake chortled.

"Mommy," Maddie asked more insistently, pulling on the bottom of my shirt. "Who is that? Is it grampa?"

"Better watch he doesn't knock himself into your furniture while he's doing his twists and jumps-"

"Is it Uncoe Jake? Mommy can I speak to Uncoe Jake?"

I put a hand over the receiver and bent down to Maddie's level. "Maddie honey, why don't you go play with Edward? You can talk to Uncle Jake next time."

Maddie quickly agreed that playing with Edward would be more fun than waiting to speak to Jake on the phone, and she ran back to the living room. Edward was still watching me with a quizzical expression, his eyes searching mine.

I turned back towards the sink. "Um, Jake, can I call you back? I'm sort of in the middle of something, and I've got to get Maddie ready for bed-"

"Yeah, sure, sure," he agreed easily. "Go take care of your little guest. Wouldn't want him twisting his delicate ankles on your watch," he snickered.

I rolled my eyes. "Good-bye Jake."

"Goodnight Bella," he laughed, hanging up.

As if reading my mind, my daughter suddenly yawned loudly, her small mouth opening widely and reminding me that bed-time for four-year olds was soon approaching. My stomach did a little anxious dance.

"Maddie honey, it's late. Time to get ready for bed," I said softly, giving her an apologetic smile as I walked into the living room.

"Mommy no, I want to stay up with Edwood until it's time for him to go home," Maddie complained, the little whine in her voice proof positive that, no matter how much she denied it, she was in fact ready to get to sleep. Pouting her lips, she raised her arms up at Edward and he picked her up instantly.

"Peez mommy?" she begged, turning sad, tired eyes to me.

"I'm sorry honey, but it's late and little girls have to go to bed."

Her bottom lip protruded further and she hung her head low. Edward chuckled quietly.

"Maddie, your mommy's right. It's getting late and I should get going anyway."

My stomach dropped in disappointment. I knew we hadn't had a chance to be alone, or to talk or…anything, but I'd been hoping he would've stayed a little longer, after I got Maddie in bed, and then maybe we could've spent some adult time together. But apparently Edward had had enough for the day. I couldn't say I blamed him; spending the day with a four-year old did require the energy level of a super-hero, and it wasn't something he was used to, but I couldn't help the bitter feeling of frustration that had settled in my chest.

"Yes honey," I said to Maddie, masking my dissatisfaction with a smile. I turned guarded eyes towards Edward. "It's been a long day and I'm sure Edward's tired."

For a moment, as he kept his eyes on me while holding Maddie and stroking her hair soothingly, he looked as if he wanted to say something. But after a few seconds he looked down at Maddie and picked up her chin with his finger.

"Hey, maybe this weekend, if your mommy doesn't have any other plans, I can come pick you both up and we can go somewhere?" His eyes twitched over to me questioningly.

I plastered an easy smile to my face, trying to placate my insides with this offer.

"Sure, that sounds great," I said honestly.

Maddie on the other hand, tired and cranky and four, knew nothing about putting on a poker face, nor was she entirely satisfied with Edward's peace offering. She shrugged her shoulders petulantly and refused to look at either one of us.

"Hey," I said softly, walking over to where she sat in Edward's arms, "how about we walk Edward downstairs, how does that sound?" She shrugged her tired shoulders again.

"Come on princess," Edward pleaded. "You can do better than that," he said, reaching up and tapping her nose gently with his finger. "My heart's going to break if I don't see you smile before I leave." She looked up at him through her long eyelashes, still pouting, but the pleading look on Edward's face was even too much for her, and she broke out into quiet giggles.

"There you go," he chuckled.

Edward's raincoat was still soaking wet, so he simply threw his dress shirt back on, not bothering to button it or tuck it in, and looking so casually comfortable it was hard for me to look away. But I swallowed and forced my eyes to look elsewhere as he got ready and I fought with the dissatisfaction at how the night was ending, without our talk, and apparently without an encore to our earlier activities. If I did see him this weekend, maybe we could talk then. I'd have to plan it out a bit better than I had tonight though.

Downstairs in the vestibule, the wind hissed loudly through the thick glass pane on the door, letting us know the Nor'Easter wasn't done with the city yet. As Maddie said her goodbye's to Edward, I squinted my eyes and tried to see through the blurry mess on the window, the wind and the rain mixing and blowing so hard that garbage was strewn all over the street, one of the branches on the tree down the block had been knocked down and blown a few yards over. Admittedly, it was a bit unsettling, and I bit my lip at the thought of Edward having to drive through this all the way back uptown. My eyes moved to where he'd parked the Volvo, wondering how well it would hold up against-

Wait. Where the heck was the Volvo? I could've sworn he parked it right across the street.

I glanced at Edward just as he set Maddie down and turned to me with a determined expression. "Bella, we need to-"

"Edward, where'd you park the car?" I asked carefully.

He looked at me quizzically. "It's across the street," he answered, automatically turning to look out the door window with me. He frowned, bringing his face closer to the window and then scanning the rest of the block from east to west. My eyes scanned thoroughly with him while Maddie held on to my hand, leaning her little exhausted body against me.

"What the-" he cut off. "I know I parked it across the street." He turned confused eyes back to me. "Wait here," he said. "I'll be right back." I nodded quickly and watched him throw his raincoat over his head and run across, the wind whipping his hair under the raincoat and blowing his shirt open so that his shoulders lay exposed as he stood dumbfounded in the middle of the block. He suddenly looked up at the street signs, studying them for a long while before running back towards us, his square jaw set tight and frowning deeply.

"What happened?" I asked when he came back into the vestibule.

He pursed his lips. "Apparently there's no parking allowed on that side of the block unless it's between the hours of seven and nine am on Tuesdays and Fridays."

"Oh no! You got towed?" I asked.

"Yup," he said, popping his lips on the p. "Only in this city would you get towed in the middle of a fu- of a darn storm like this," he added, shaking his head while he stared out the window, as if he stared long enough the Volvo would appear.

I gnawed on my lip anxiously. "What're you going to do?"

His eyes moved back to me and his features softened. He lifted a finger to my mouth and released my lip again. One corner of his lips twitched up. "I told you to stop doing that, that's my job."

My face heated up again. He chuckled and shook his head, reaching into his pocket and pulling out his cell phone. He sighed. "I guess I'll be crashing at Alice's tonight."

By this time, Maddie's knees were giving out. I picked her up quietly and cradled her while Edward dialed Alice's number. But a four year old, no matter how light while awake, weighs more than a ton of bricks once she's knocked out, and when Edward saw me struggling with her limp body he took her from me quickly and held her easily in one hand while holding the phone in the other.

A sweet soprano voice answered on the other line.

"Hey Alice," Edward said. "Look I'm at Bella's and-" he paused as an obvious squeal rang out on the other end, and then words so fast and high pitched came through that I was sure I heard the neighbor's dog howl in pain.

"Alice," – more shrill jabbering – "Alice," – he rolled his eyes – "Alice, can we do this later?" He took a deep breath and tried again. "Look, my car was towed. I'm coming over to you for the night-" He frowned. "What do you mean you're not- where are you?" He listened intently while Alice said something on the other line, closing his eyes and shaking his head. "No, don't do that. It'd make no sense." Maddie breathed in a few short sighs in succession - fast asleep in his arms – while Edward's arm tightened around her as he continued his conversation. I wasn't even sure if he was aware of how protectively he held her.

"By the time you get here, I'll be home." He listened for a few seconds. "No, don't worry about it," he said. "I'll take the subway. Yes Alice, I know how to take the subway." He rolled his eyes. "I'll talk to you later, bye."

He hung up and slowly met my eyes. "Alice and Jasper decided not to try and drive in this and are staying at The Plaza for the night."

"They're not home?"

"Nope."

I chewed on the inside of my mouth. "What are you going to do?"

He shrugged. "Take the subway home."

"You hate the subway. And besides, remember what they said on the news? The subway's a mess right now."

He shrugged again. "S'alright. I'm a native New Yorker. We live for just such transit challenges. Come on, let me carry Maddie back upstairs and then I'll get going."

He started walking towards the elevator, while I remained frozen to my spot, a blister forming on the inside of my lip from how hard I'd bitten myself. My pulse raced in my veins, my heart beat so loudly in my ears I was sure Edward could hear it. My hands were beginning to sweat.

When he realized I hadn't followed, he turned, tilting his head as he furrowed his brows at me. "You okay?" he asked. He asked that a lot, I'd noticed.

I nodded slowly, my mouth feeling so dry I could barely get the words out. "Edward, why don't you…stay here for the night?" I finally blurted out. "It'll take you forever to get home on the subway and…and you have to come back tomorrow anyway to get your car. It doesn't make sense for you to spend probably the whole night trying to get home when you have to come back this way tomorrow anyhow," I went on. "Maddie and I…we've got the pullout in the living room…I mean, it's probably not the most comfortable mattress in the world, but it should do for one night. And then you can get your car early tomorrow, and…" I stopped, knowing I was just blabbering at that point.

Edward gazed at me, his expression unreadable as he cradled Maddie gently in his arms. After a long moment he asked, "Are you sure?"

_No_. "Yeah, sure," I said, waving an arm in the air much more nonchalantly than I felt. "But I warn you," I joked – trying to relieve the tension of the moment – "that little angel in your arms wakes up with the roosters. And her internal alarm clock doesn't have a weekend setting."

He chuckled, but sounded nervous. "If you're sure then…" he repeated, giving me a chance to change my mind.

I took a deep breath. "I'm sure."

He studied me a moment longer, searching my face for something. "Alright then," he finally said in a low voice. "Thanks."

I nodded, wondering what the hell I'd just gotten myself into. Smiling more confidently than I felt, I moved in front of him to lead the way. "Come on, let's go."

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**Sorry to end it there guys, but the next update's coming soon. Promise.**

**Let me know what we're thinking about Paul. Any ideas of what may have been the straw that broke the camel's back? **

**Reviews are almost as good as having Edward as your sous chef! Leave one please and thank you.**


	17. Chapter 16 Grown Up Play Dates

**A/N: I was going to post this last night, but today is the REAL Maddie's b'day, and I was busy getting things ready for her. **

**Still in Bella's head here. Get your snacks and a warm cup of hot chocolate, and get uhm...ready. **

**Danna0724, what would I do without your lovely beta-ing, and hilarious comments? Chonies – I'm still chuckling at that one.**

**All characters, except for little Maddie, belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 16 – Grown Up Play Dates**

**Chapter Song Recs: **

**First half of story: ****If I were a Boy****– **by Beyonce

**Second half of story: ****Halo**** – by Beyonce **(Again)  
**Bring Me To Life** – by Evanescence

**BPOV**

Once back in the apartment, I carefully took Maddie from Edward. "Let me just get her settled in bed and then I'll bring you some blankets and stuff, okay?"

Edward nodded, and I took a knocked out Maddie to her room, laying her carefully on her bed and changing her into her pajamas while I fought a battle of biblical proportions with my nerves and my mind.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, what had I just done? Edward was sleeping in my house! The man I'd been making out with only hours earlier would be sleeping just a few short feet from my bed tonight. The man I felt an indescribable pull to on so many different levels that I hadn't even figured them all out yet, would be right within reach for hours upon hours tonight, while the city slept, with no one watching. Just he and I and a sleeping little girl. Alone. On a dark, stormy night.

Crap, what had I gotten myself into_? _

The small lamp we'd left on cast a low glow in the living room, giving off just enough light so that I could see Edward's profile against the sofa, his head bent low, his body angled forward, his arms resting on his knees with his hands crossed together as if in deep thought. He'd removed his dress shirt again, and the sight of him sitting there quietly - his square shoulders and muscular torso silhouetted by the sparse lighting – was enough to take my breath away. He startled when he heard me approaching and looked up, his expression tense. As calmly as possible, I walked over to him.

"Here you go," I said, placing the blankets from the linen closet and my spare pillow in his arms, grinning down at him as if this sleepover arrangement were the most blasé thing in the world.

He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down slowly. "Thanks," he murmured.

"Sure," I said, and took a seat on the other side of the sofa. My eyes involuntarily traveled to his shoulders.

Edward noticed. "Oh, uh, the shirt got kind of wet again, and I figured I'd hang it by the radiator…"

"No, no, that's fine," I reassured him quickly. "Please, get comfortable. I mean, as comfortable as you can get I guess," I added right away, chuckling nervously. "I wish I had, you know, something for you to change in to, but…"

"No, this is great," he said, holding up the blankets in his hands. "This'll be just perfect actually." I thought I saw him quickly sniff the pillow before putting it to the side along with the blanket.

I nodded once more, looking away from him so as to not be tempted by his chiseled bare shoulders again. What should I do now? Should I get up and leave, let him get to sleep?

We both spoke at the same time.

"Do you want some coffee or-"

"I was looking at your pictures-"

We chuckled together. Edward put the blankets aside and put a hand out in a motion for me to go first.

"Do you want some coffee or hot chocolate or something? Or uhm, if you want to get to sleep that's fine too-"

"No! I mean, hot chocolate sounds great, thanks."

"Okay," I said, getting up quickly and moving to the kitchen, grateful for something to do.

I moved around swiftly, taking the milk out from the fridge and pouring enough for two cups into a small pot. The insistent rainfall outside pounded heavily against the small kitchen window, reminding me of why I was here making two cups of hot chocolate rather than one. Butterflies danced anxiously in my stomach as I waited for the milk to heat up. A flash of lightning in the distance lit up the apartment and four seconds later the loud roar of thunder reverberated against the walls, startling me and making me jump. My nerves were definitely on edge.

Edward cleared his throat. "I was looking at the pictures on your bookshelf while you were putting Maddie in bed."

"Oh?" I called out, emptying the powdered chocolate into two mugs. "Yeah, those are mostly of Maddie."

"Yeah," he said thoughtfully. "Seriously Bella, she is such a beauty."

"Well I think so," I agreed with a smile, recalling the small shrine to every one of my daughter's most important and memorable moments; her first tooth, her first real meal, her first steps; moments which should've meant the world to two parents, but which had been completely missed by one. I sighed, looking over at Edward. He was standing by the bookshelf, drinking in the pictures intently, as if trying to memorize each moment.

I tilted my head, watching him curiously until I heard the milk bubbling in the pot and turned the burner off. Pouring the steamy milk into the waiting two mugs, I carried them back to the living room, where Edward waited by the sofa again. Already I felt better, more at ease with a cup of my favorite warm drink in my hands. I handed Edward his and took up a seat on the other side of the sofa, curling my legs under me.

"Thanks," he said, curving his long fingers around the mug, his expression relaxing as he inhaled the sweet-scented steam. He closed his eyes. "Aaah. Now _this_ is hot chocolate weather; cold rain, thunder and lightning, a dark black sky. _Not_ a bright, sunny morning in early September when it's eighty degrees outside," he teased, referring to the time we'd bumped into each other at Starbucks almost two months ago.

As if to illustrate Edward's statement, another flash of lightning flared right outside the draped windows. He brought his eyes up to me, his lips twitching.

"I said it then and I stand by it now," I smirked, "_Anytime_ is a good time for hot chocolate."

He chuckled, turning his attention to his drink. His head bent down, he brought the mug closer to his mouth and puckered his lips, blowing out softly. The air from between his lips rippled the dark liquid on the surface and when he brought his lips to the mug, his tongue peeked out slightly, carefully testing the steaming drink. I forced myself to look away.

I cleared my throat. "But Maddie, yes, she's always been a photogenic little girl, a camera-hog even," I said, focusing on the pictures Edward had just been looking at.

Edward took a sip of his hot chocolate. A satisfied smile spread across his lips as he swallowed.

"So I see," he said with a grin, turning his head towards the bookshelf. "I take it the man in the uniform's your dad?"

I turned my eyes to the picture of me and my dad in his uniform, cradling a two-year old Maddie. "Yup, that's the Chief," I confirmed.

"And who's the other guy, the one with the dark hair holding Maddie in that other picture?"

"That's Jake."

Edward nodded, unsurprised. A dozen questions flooded his eyes, but he asked none of them. His eyes trailed back to the picture of Charlie.

"Look at the way your dad looks at you," he murmured. "So proud."

I puckered my brows. "Well, I don't know about that, but I do know he'd do anything for Maddie and me, even though he's not the most expressive man in the world. He's kind of hard to read sometimes."

Edward's eyebrows went up. "Gee, I wonder what it's like to know someone like _that_," he said with a bemused grin.

"Ha, ha," I said through twisted lips. "Seriously though," – I tightened my grip around my mug – "I…didn't really give him much to be proud of there for a while, well, except for his granddaughter of course, but he always hung in there for me. Never left my side." I turned my eyes away, feeling my chest tighten.

Edward was quiet for a few moments. "I'm sure he's got many reasons to be proud of you," he insisted quietly before taking a deep breath. "I on the other hand, have been nothing but an embarrassment to my father for the past few years."

I finally took a sip of my hot chocolate, frowning when I burned my tongue. "I'm sure that's not true," I murmured.

Edward shrugged. "It is. Well, I think…maybe lately, we might be turning a corner, but…" – he ran a hand through his damp hair nervously – "it's been rough."

"What happened?" I asked curiously, before realizing he might not want to talk about it. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

"No, don't apologize Bella," he said. "You're not prying." He breathed in deeply, holding my gaze.

"The whole thing started when I was eight years old or so, with a toy doctor's set."

"What happened, did you try to give the girl next door a physical and get busted?" I asked teasingly.

He chuckled. "No, I don't think my dad ever found out about _that_."

I smirked and rolled my eyes. He laughed. "Seriously," he said, the laughter fading from his face, replaced with a far-away look. "ever since we were kids, Alice and Emmett always knew what they wanted to do. The way my mom tells it, Alice practically danced her way out her uterus, and Emmett, well Emmett was born a salesman, he could talk an Eskimo into buying ice in the middle of the Arctic. I mean, he talked Rose into marrying him," he said, shaking his head incredulously. "That's enough said there."

"And you?" I prompted, ignoring his deflection with humor.

"Me?" he asked, shrugging again. "I was just Edward, the middle kid, the one who didn't stand out.

I placed my mug down on the coffee table with a slight thud. "Now _that_ I really don't believe."

He snorted. "It's true. Well, I guess I had some…talents; sports, the piano-"

"Cooking," I threw in, trying to make him smile.

It worked. "Yes, cooking," he agreed with a smirk.

"Good looks," I added playfully.

He groaned. "Yes, I suppose," he agreed sheepishly.

"A magnetic personality," I said.

"Do you want to hear this or not?"

I giggled. "I'm sorry. Go ahead. I'm just having a really hard time picturing you as someone who didn't _always_ stand out."

He drew in a deep breath, twisting his lips. "Fine, maybe what I should say is I didn't _feel_ like I stood out when it came to my father."

"Aaah," I said, picking my mug back up.

"You know, he had his little girl who could do no wrong, his eldest son, and then there was me."

I wanted to tell him that even though I hadn't known him as a child, I knew there was no way he could've ever been invisible. Not him. But I let him tell his story.

"Well, for my eighth birthday, someone, I can't remember who, gave me one of those medical sets, you know, not those cheap plastic ones, but the ones with a real working stethoscope and a real sphygmomanometer and shit?"

I nodded because it seemed that's what he was waiting for, even though I had not clue what the heck a sphygmom-whatever was.

"Well, I'm playing with it outside one day, trying it out on Alice. This was pre girl-next-door," he said with a sly grin. "And my father comes home from the hospital and sees me out there with the stethoscope on Alice's back, telling her to breathe in and out and whatnot, and I swear to you Bella, his eyes light up like the friggin' Rockefeller Christmas tree."

I tilted my head quizzically, a half smile on my face.

He saw my confusion. "You see," he explained, "he had his little girl, who did nothing but dance and twirl all day, and his eldest son who was clearly going to be a business man someday, but none of us had ever shown an interest in following in his footsteps, in being the doctor of the family." I frowned and he explained further. "My dad, he comes from a long line of surgeons, always the top in their field. It's what the Cullen name is known for here on the East Coast. His father was a surgeon, his father's father, and his father, and so on; all the way back to the early eighteen hundreds."

"But that doesn't mean one of you had to be a surgeon."

"You're right. It doesn't," he agreed. "And in my father's defense, he never said it did. I can't say I remember a time when he tried to force our interests in that direction, but…that day Bella, the way he looked at me, I felt like he was finally seeing me, like I'd found the way to make myself stand out."

"Was it what you wanted?" I asked.

He shrugged. "For a time, sure. I mean, why not? I did well in school, in Biology, Chemistry-"

"Brains. Another talent," I pointed out quickly.

"Yeah, okay," he agreed impatiently. "By the time I got into pre-med at Dartmouth, it was just accepted that I'd be the one to carry on the Cullen legacy. My father couldn't have been more proud. Everything was just fine."

"And then what happened?"

"Then…one day…a couple of years into college, my soccer team and I had just won a game against Harvard, those snotty bastards, and they're carrying me on their shoulders and shit-"

"Carrying you on their shoulders?"

He shrugged again. "Yeah, I was sort of the captain of the soccer team."

Something pulled on the fuzzy edges of my memories again, but Edward kept talking and I had to listen.

"So they're carrying me around campus, and suddenly I get this strange feeling, something I've never felt before. It overwhelmed me for a while. For days after that, I kept returning to the spot where I first felt it, as if somehow the answer to everything would be waiting there. Of course it wasn't. But I kept thinking about it and thinking about it, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that my being there, in pre-med, wasn't my dream, it was my dad's. And then when I thought about it even further, I realized that what I'd always really enjoyed, what had really excited me, was listening to Emmett's stories about business school when he came home from Wharton during breaks. So," - he put his empty mug of chocolate down – "I went home and told my dad I was transferring from the pre-med program to the business school."

"He was upset?" I asked, biting my lip and feeling strangely defensive of a twenty-one year old Edward, coming home to face a father who'd expected him to carry on the family legacy, a dream he'd only ever had to please him.

"He hit the roof," Edward confirmed. "Said he'd stop paying for school if I switched. Turns out he was just bluffing, as my mother told me later on, but you know, I was twenty-one, I didn't want anyone telling me what to do, so I probably over-reacted in return. Told him to shove his money where the sun don't shine and turned to the trust fund my grandmother left me when she died."

"So that's why you and your dad don't get along very well?"

His expression turned contrite. "That was the beginning of it I guess. I can't really blame him for the things I did after that. I acted stupid and immature, lashed out to punish and hurt him, and in the end only hurt myself."

"Things like what?" I asked quietly. I had a feeling that's why he'd brought this whole thing up. He wanted to tell me what he'd done, who he'd been, to see if it was something I could accept and get past, someone I could see past.

He swallowed thickly, his eyes trained on mine intently. "Well, you know. Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy," he said sarcastically. "I guess the fucking title was well-earned. Every society family this city's ever had has also had a black sheep. The Vanderbilt's had one, the Kennedy's had one. _I'm_ the black sheep of the Cullen Family. I don't need to tell you, I'm sure you've read it all."

"I don't want to know about what they write about you." My mind drifted to the pictures of him and Tanya last week, the headline, Eddie C. Back to Old Games, Old Flames. I hadn't read past that, the pictures and headlines had said it all.

"I want to know the real you. I need _you_ to tell me what's real and not real."

His eyes clouded over, filled with self-reproach. "That _is_ real Bella. You want to hear a denial? I can't give you that. What you've read about me over the years, what you've heard, most of it _has_ been true. I've slept around, I've gotten crazy drunk at parties, I was never into drugs, but I can't say I've never tried them. After my…falling out with my father, I was angry. I was so…_disappointed_ that after I'd spent my whole damn life trying to make him proud, he'd hold this one damn thing against me. I didn't need his money any more. Thanks to my grandmother I could take care of myself financially. I didn't need to follow anyone's rules, not his, not society's. So the partying started, and then girl after girl. While Time Magazine and Business Week were doing stories on Alice Cullen and her life as a Ballerina, or Emmett Cullen and how every major corporation in this country was courting him, People and the Enquirer were covering Edward Cullen's latest misadventure. Every time I came home from school my father and I would get into the same argument, he'd tell me how I was messing up my life, my reputation, and I'd tell him he didn't give a damn about my life or my reputation, he was just pissed off I hadn't gone to medical school, and it was the Cullen reputation he was worried about. I've realized now that wasn't true, that he really _was_ worried about me because I _was_ fucking up my life, but back then…" he trailed off. "After a while, I barely went home anymore. I graduated at the top of my class because apparently I at least knew what I was doing academically. And then Jasper, whom I met at Dartmouth, and Emmett and I started CCW. The business did well from the start, as you probably know, but my personal life, that was a fucking circus, and all of it played out publicly for the world to see."

I sat quietly, staring down into my still full mug of hot chocolate. My mind was reeling, confusion twisting and turning my stomach into knots. But I'd known some of this already, hadn't I? The reasons why I'd avoided him so much early on, because of the image the tabloids portrayed of him. Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy. But reading it and hearing him admit to it were two completely different things. And the tabloids had never talked about the other things, the ones Edward was telling me about now. How could they have? As usual, the real story was hidden beneath so many layers of lies and half-truths. Those were things I knew of well.

I took a deep breath. "And Tanya?" I made myself ask. I needed to know.

He didn't answer right away. "Tanya," he finally said, a bitter tone in his voice. "Tanya and I started up a couple of years ago. She's my cousin Victoria's friend; just as rich and spoiled as I was. The tabloids…the tabloids have a tendency to latch on to a story and sensationalize it even further. Like a rabid animal they bite down and don't let go until it's been sucked dry of every last drop of blood. That's what they've done with Tanya and me. The whole thing's dead and gone, but the paparazzi is squeezing every last drop of blood out of it."

I flinched at his choice of words, _Tanya and me_, but I kept my eyes on my mug, watching the thin film that meant it was getting cold form on top. Edward didn't offer up any more information after that, and I really didn't feel like asking. I'd asked for the truth and I'd gotten it. Would I have preferred a lie, a denial as he'd said –Paul's method of dealing with my questions? Had I gotten so used to lies that I couldn't deal with the truth anymore?

For a long while, we sat stock still, neither of us moving a muscle. The silence inside was stifling, while outside, the distant echo of thunder rolled away, it's rumbling magnified ten-fold by our inactivity. Even in this weather, car horns still blared noisily, people still trying to travel to and fro in this constantly busy city. The glow from passing headlights occasionally floated through the windows, bouncing around the living room and illuminating our still forms. In the distance, the sound of a car alarm whined incessantly, probably activated by the roaring thunder. But now even that noise couldn't make me flinch.

Finally, after what felt like hours, I made myself look up. A flare of lightning streaming through the windows settled like a spotlight on Edward's agonized features, it's blinking magnifying the sharp set of his jaw, the misery in his eyes. He looked so lost and unsure, nothing like the over-confident, cocky man the tabloids made him out to be. At some point he'd started anxiously rubbing the inside of his palm with the thumb from his other hand.

He snorted suddenly, looking up at me guiltily through long dark eyelashes. "I guess I'm not the kind of guy you'd want to bring home to your police chief father." He waited for my answer. When I didn't respond, he looked at his hands, still rubbing against each other nervously, his wide shoulders weighed down by silence. "Yeah, well, what can you expect from a man who'd take middle-child issues that far, right?"

I had to say something. He was misinterpreting my silence for something it wasn't. But words escaped me, and so in lieu of them, I carefully set my mug down again, and kneeling on my legs, reached across to his side of the sofa and took his anxious hands in mine, lacing our fingers together, comforting him the way he always did me. Instantly, his muscles relaxed, the sharp set of his jaw smoothed out. He looked up and when our eyes met, those blazing green eyes set my heart on fire, the way they had since day one, no matter how hard I'd tried to resist.

Somehow, my voice came back to me. "Thank you."

He frowned, puzzled. "Thank you?" he repeated in amazement.

"Yes. Thank you for being honest with me. For not denying anything, or making excuses for yourself. For manning up to the things you consider to be your mistakes or your faults. But you see yourself in a very negative light Edward, and I can't share that opinion of you."

He narrowed his emerald eyes, still confused. "Why not? After everything I've told you. How could you see me as anything other than a selfish, immoral player?"

I tightened my hold on his hands. He looked down and sighed.

"Do you want me to tell you what I see?" I asked quietly. "I see an honest, caring man, who yes, made some mistakes, but who never let those mistakes get the better of him. I see a man who's been there for his family, even when he thought they weren't there for him. I see a man who knows how to right his wrongs. That's who I see Edward. And you're right, the tabloids have sensationalized you. They've magnified every part of you you'd rather hide, but they haven't seen the real you Edward, the one I'm seeing now."

Edward gazed at me in disbelief. Slowly, he released his hands from mine and brought them up to cup my face. His eyes bored into mine with such intensity, with a fervor that took my breath away. "How can you see through me that way? How can you understand me so well?" he whispered.

Now it was time for my truths. I sat back down on my behind, keeping my legs curled under me. I took his hands back into mine and lowered them to my lap. "Because I'm not one to be judging you Edward. I understand a lot better than you probably think I do. You think you took your middle-child issues a bit too far? Well I took my abandonment issues and ran with them, ran with them so far that I let them dictate some of the most important decisions in my life."

Understanding flooded his eyes. He tightened his hold on me, intertwining our fingers tightly, offering me encouragement and support now.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" he asked softly.

I nodded hesitantly, unable to take my eyes off of his. I took a long, deep breath, letting it out in a large gust, and then chuckled once nervously. "My issues probably started when I was a few months old, with my parent's divorce."

"I'm sorry Bella," he whispered quickly. "It must've been hard growing up without your dad."

I chuckled. "Actually, that wasn't the problem. My parents were very young when they got married and divorced, but my dad, as young as he was then, was always there for me, from day one. _He_ has always been a real father." Edward looked at me questioningly, but let me continue. "When my parents divorced, my mom moved us to Phoenix. As far back as I can remember, I used to go to Forks for the summer and spend them with my dad, and he'd come for odd weekends in between to visit me in Arizona too. My mom…she's always been very…young at heart," I said with a careful smile. "I'm sure she tried her best with me, but I'm not sure she was ready to be a mom when she had me." Edward pursed his lips, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Anyway," I continued, "When I was fourteen, my mom met a man, Phil, and married him within two weeks of knowing him. He was nice enough I guess, but Phil was a minor league baseball player trying to make it into the big leagues, and he traveled a lot and my mom decided that she wanted to go with him. So she shipped me off to Forks to live with Charlie."

"Mmm," Edward murmured; disapproval thick in his voice.

"I was fine with it. At least, I thought I was. I'd always felt more at home in Forks anyway, the rest of the year always felt like a waiting period for the summer. Now I was permanently at home," I stressed, hearing the slight lie in my own voice. "I started high school that year, made some friends, Mike, Angela, Ben, Jessica…" I trailed off, remembering. "Anyway," I said, "It was okay. Charlie was easy to live with; he wasn't the hovering kind of parent; pretty much left me to my own devices. I did the housework and the cooking, much as I'd done back with Renee. I went to school, hung out with my friends sometimes, and hung out a lot with Jake, who'd been my best friend since I was six years old."

Edward's hands stiffened in mine.

"I've known Jake forever. His dad and mine are still best friends. His mom passed away when we were kids, but Jake…Jake's always been like a ray of sunshine; never let anything get him down for too long. If I ever felt down about anything, Jake would always be around to cheer me up. We were really close." Edward nodded; his eyes unreadable. "Back then, I divided my time between Forks and my friends from school, and La Push, the small beach town where Jake and the rest of the Quileute tribe live."

"Jake's Native American?" Edward asked curiously.

"Yes, and so is Maddie, well…half. That's where she gets her pretty color from." I saw the question in Edward's eyes, the same question that had been there when he'd asked about the picture of Maddie and Jake.

"My senior year of high school started out simply enough. My friend Angela and I had always been the brainy, geeky two in our group of friends-"

Edward interrupted. "I can't believe _you_ were ever geeky," he grinned.

"Oh believe me I was, I really was," I assured him with a loud snort. He didn't look too convinced, but I shrugged and continued. "Anyway, Angela and I dreamt of going to Dartmouth." Edward raised his eyebrows. "I told you about that," I reminded him. "I told you I'd been accepted to Dartmouth."

"Yes, but you never told me why you didn't go."

"Why didn't I go?" I chuckled humorlessly. "The reason I didn't go starts out the way most of these stories start out. I met a guy…I met a guy and in the blink of an eye, my simple, planned out life went topsy turvy." Edward rubbed soothing circles in the palms of my hands, keeping the rest of his fingers laced with mine

I took a deep breath. "One of the tribe's youngest leaders, Sam, was a good friend of Jake's and when Jake was sixteen, he offered him an after-school job at his garage. Jake's always been really good with his hands," – I thought I saw Edward roll his eyes – "and he's always had a brilliant mechanical mind. So when I wasn't working at my own after-school job, I spent a lot of time at the garage. The rest of the guys there, Sam, Collin, Jared, Seth, we all became really good friends. They all treated me like their sister." I paused, but Edward didn't rush me. "One day, a couple of months into senior year, I arrived at the garage after school and Jake was upset, which was surprising, because Jake was hardly ever upset. He told me his dad had just told him that his older cousin from Hoquiam, a small town a couple of hours from us, was having problems with his family and was coming to stay with them. I'd never met his cousin, but whenever Jake talked about him his black eyes would grow even darker. There'd always been some animosity between them, although I'd never found out why. Billy had also spoken to Sam apparently and gotten him a job at the garage, so Jake's cousin would be around…a lot."

Edward breathed in deeply. "I think I know who this cousin is."

"Yeah," I confirmed with a quiet sigh and a nod. "I walk into the garage a few days later, and there he is, bent over a car, no shirt on, his pants riding low on his hips, his muscles tight and-"

"I get it Bella," Edward said with a scowl.

"Sorry" I cleared my throat. "Anyway, the unbelievable thing was that he was as attracted to me as I was to him."

"That's not half as unbelievable as you seem to think it is," Edward said seriously. "I'm trying to figure out how all those guys in that garage got any work done with your visits to Jake."

I rolled my eyes and ignored his comment. "Things happened really fast after that. Before I knew it, I was Paul's girlfriend, Jake was barely speaking to me, and things weren't so simple anymore. At first, I tried to get Jake to talk to me but…after a while…Paul kept telling me to leave him alone, that he'd get over it, that he was just jealous. But jealous of what? I'd ask. I told him Jake was like a brother to me and he told me I was blind if I thought Jake saw me as a sister. After that, I just felt uncomfortable around Jake, especially if Paul was around, which he always was…at first. After what Paul had said, I felt like I was flaunting my relationship with Paul in Jake's face, at the garage, in his own home. It made me feel horrible. But I fell _hard_ Edward," I admitted. "He was my first real boyfriend. Mike Newton and I…we'd sort of kissed once at the movie theatre when we all went out together, but he was so sloppy I was wiping his saliva off of my face for days after that. After a while, I started hearing rumors around town about Paul, that he'd been seen with other girls, that he wasn't as serious about me as I was about him. When I'd confront him, he'd give me excuses or tell me everyone was lying and who was I going to believe, them or him? And Charlie didn't say anything, not even when I told him I wasn't going to Dartmouth; that I'd be going to Washington State instead because that's where Paul was. All he did was warn me to be careful. The thing was, by then, I had this perpetual feeling in the pit of my stomach, like something was wrong, but I couldn't talk about it with anyone. I couldn't talk to my friends because most of them didn't like Paul much by that point. I wanted to talk to Jake but he'd barely even look at me. And then my mom…" I sighed again. "See, Paul's a real charmer when he wants to be. He's got these dark eyes that just hypnotize you, and Renee…Renee came to Forks for my high school graduation. In all her simplicity though, Renee can be very observant, and she was one of the few people that hated Paul right off the bat."

"I think I'm starting to like Renee," Edward said.

"Yeah well. She stayed for a few days, and the night before she left, we got into a big fight. She said she saw me making all the same mistakes she'd made. Told me not to rearrange my life for a guy; that I'd end up stuck in a dead-end relationship. She warned me not to get pregnant because it would ruin my life. And well" -my voice grew shaky and I could feel the heat of shame coloring my face - "All I could see then Edward was the woman who'd never been a real mother to me. Who'd let me make my own breakfast since I was five years old and could serve myself cold cereal and pop-tarts, who'd dragged me to a psychic cleaning when I was ten because she'd been told I had a negative aura, who'd shipped me off to my father when I was fourteen so she could follow her young husband around the country. I blew up at her, told her I was nothing like her, that just because she couldn't make her relationship with my dad work didn't mean my relationship with Paul wouldn't. And I dug my feet in hard," I hissed, my nostrils flaring. "I held on even tighter to Paul after that."

Edward sucked his teeth. But it wasn't reproach. "Bella," he murmured softly. "I wish…"

I looked up at him, ashamed, a guilty laugh escaping my lips. "I was eighteen. How was I supposed to know that Renee was finally giving me some good advice?"

He didn't answer; he just kept stroking my hands with his thumbs soothingly. "So to prove her wrong, to prove my life didn't have to be a repeat of hers, I did marry Paul at twenty. But I was determined my marriage wouldn't fail like hers had. And then a year later I let Paul talk me into trying for a baby, even though he'd dropped out of college by then, and unbeknownst to me, was having problems with Sam at the garage. And Jake…Jake and I had grown so far apart." I shook my head. "My friends had all left for college, except for Jessica, who went to Washington State with Paul and me." I snorted.

"When I was about five months pregnant, Paul lost his job at the garage. Even though it embarrassed me, I went to see Sam, because I was pregnant and still in college and my part-time job at Newton's Outfitters wasn't going to get us very far. Sam said he was really sorry, but Paul had done some things that he couldn't look past, but he refused to tell me what they were. And when Sam offered me a full-time job instead as the office receptionist, I took it. I had to drop out of college for a while, but I told myself I'd go back as soon as Paul got another job. The pregnancy itself was going well. I was healthy, the baby was healthy, but my marriage…it was as if as soon as I'd gotten pregnant, Paul had realized what a mistake he'd made, not just with asking for a child, but with the whole marriage thing. He changed, not that he was such a great husband before, but he wouldn't come home some nights, and when he was home, he'd avoid me studiously. He never asked how I felt, how the baby was doing. It was as if we were two strangers living together."

Edward's eyes had grown steadily darker as I told him about my marriage. His fingers still soothed me, but his jaw and shoulders were so rigid I was starting to think he was the one that needed soothing.

"The job at the garage was enough to pay our bills, but there was little left over after that. Even so, I did my best to save what we could, but with the baby coming soon, I was having a hard time getting together the things we'd need for her. My dad knew I'd never take money from him, so he used to show up sometimes with groceries, claiming he missed my cooking, or with a little baby bouncer he said he found at a garage sale. Small things like that, but I knew what he was doing. I was so ashamed I couldn't even tell him I didn't have enough money to buy a crib. Some days, while I sat at my desk at the garage, I'd dream of what my life would have been like had I never met Paul, if I'd gone to Dartmouth with Angela. But the first time the baby kicked, all that changed, because I realized that no matter what, every decision I'd made had brought me to that moment, to having her inside me, and I couldn't regret any of it. With Paul so absent now and my marriage crumbling, Jake and I had started reconnecting again. By that point I knew that what Paul had said to me that day long ago was true, Jake didn't see me as a sister. But I needed him in my life. I knew it was selfish and wrong of me. I knew that although we were just friends, deep inside he wanted something from me I could never give him. But he was my only sunshine. Him and the little baby growing inside of me."

My voice began shaking. "One weekend, while I was at home doing the bills, the doorbell rang. When I opened the door, there wrapped in a huge pink and white bow was a beautiful, wooden crib, the posts carved with intricate roses and vines, and a beautiful family of swans carved delicately into the base. I started crying right away because I knew only Jake could've made something so beautiful. Paul came out and when he saw the crib, he figured out right away who'd made it. He smiled this cold, dark smile, and without saying another word jumped in his car. I had no idea what he was thinking, but knowing him like I did, I followed him in my truck. He drove right over to the garage and right there, in front of everyone, with me seven months pregnant and Jake caught completely off-guard, Paul accused us of having an affair. He said the baby I was carrying wasn't his, and that I was trying to trick him since there'd be no way to tell…"

By this time Edward's expression was murderous. In a low, rough voice, he asked, "What do you mean there'd be no way to tell?"

I removed my hands from Edward's and brought them up to cover my face, rubbing my forehead hard. I'd never said this out loud to anyone. After a while, I pulled my hands away. Inhaling and exhaling a few times I finally said,

"Edward, the reason Jake and Paul never got along was because," – I hesitated, and then blurted it out – "something happened once between Billy, Jake's father, and Paul's mother. Jake and Paul are half-brothers." I saw the shock in Edward's eyes. "I didn't know until I'd started working at the garage. Jake told me one day and then it all made sense to me, the animosity and competitiveness between them. Why Paul resented Jake. Why they both had that same charming personality that made them both immediately loved by most everyone. But Jake's…Jake's was _real._ What you saw was what you got with Jake. Whereas Paul, once you got to know him, _really_ know him…"

Edward closed his eyes for a second and shook his head quickly, as if he was having a hard time absorbing everything.

"I'm sorry Edward. If I've said more than you wanted to know-"

He took my hands again, holding them tighter than ever, protectively. His eyes were blazing. "No Bella. Please, keep going. I want to know as much as you're willing to tell me."

"Things came to blows. The police were called; my father showed up and threw them both in jail. I tried to follow but he sent me home, said I was in no condition to be following my husband and best friend to jail. I guess he was right. After that, Paul and I barely spoke. I was angry that he would say such a thing after everything I'd put up with from him for years. He _knew_ me. He _knew_ I wouldn't do something like that. He hadn't said that because he was jealous, at least not in the way a husband would be. It'd just been pure hatred that had made him say something so ugly. That's when I started seeing what kind of man I'd really married. He kept coming and going as he pleased, and I kept working at the garage, but because of what Paul had said in front of everyone, I felt everyone's eyes on me and Jake all the time, suspicious, wondering…" I sighed. "So I kept my distance from Jake…again. But word spreads so quickly in small towns, and I'd hear whispers at the supermarket, or in line at the bank." I shook my head.

"A couple of weeks before the baby was due, I was home alone. I had no idea where Paul was, and frankly by that time I felt more at ease when he wasn't around." I smiled; this was one of the few parts of this story that made me happy. "I remember I'd just gotten up from the dinner table to get a glass of water when I felt a warm liquid trailing down my legs. At first I was scared that I'd peed on myself but then when I realized that my water had broken and I was home alone, well that's when the real terror set in. I tried calling Paul on his cell, but it kept going straight to voice mail. My dad and Billy had gone up to Seattle for the day for a boat show. I tried Jessica, but it turned out she was out of town too. And finally, terrified and in more pain than I'd ever imagined, I called Jake. He was at my house in ten minutes. By then, I was howling louder than a damn wolf." I laughed. Edward chuckled carefully, but his face had softened, his eyes looked mesmerized.

"Somehow Jake fit me into his car and drove me to the hospital. My labor had progressed a lot quicker than even the doctor's had expected, especially considering it was my first child, and when it was time for me to push, Jake made to leave but I wouldn't let go of his hand. He was terrified and I think, a little disgusted, but he stayed through the whole thing, and when Maddie was born, it was Jake that cut the umbilical cord and Jake that held her first, even before they put her in my arms. She didn't even cry. She just looked up at him with her big, wide eyes; huge uncle and tiny little niece." I laughed again. "Of course, if you ever hear the story from Jake, he'll tell you he delivered Maddie himself and cut the umbilical cord with his teeth," I chuckled, tears streaming down my face at the memory.

Edward reached up gently and wiped them away, and I could've sworn I saw his own eyes glistening in the low light.

"I'm glad he was there for you. For both you and Maddie," he breathed; the sincerity clear in his eyes and voice. I could only nod.

My smile faded. "Paul showed up at the hospital a few hours later, and Jessica not long after." I shook my head. "He saw Jake there with me and started in on how it was good to see that the kid's father had shown up for her birth. They argued again, and the nurses called security and threw them both out. Paul hadn't even looked at Maddie before he got thrown out. More gossip for the wonderful town of Forks."

Edward shook his head. We both knew what it was like to live with gossip and rumors.

"For the next few months, Paul rarely looked at Maddie. He never held her, never offered to feed her, or change her. And the weird thing was, when he was around, Maddie would start crying; she'd calm down as soon as he left the room. Paul still hadn't gotten a job, and by then he wasn't even looking anymore. Sam and his wife Emily had decided to move to Oregon, and Sam offered to sell the garage to Jake. Jake of course jumped on the offer; he was the best mechanic within a hundred miles. The day I went to the garage to beg for my job back, Jake took me back right away, gave me a raise I didn't deserve, even though I tried to protest. I went back to work when Maddie was six weeks old, and between my dad, who was semi-retired by then, and my friend Jessica, they took care of Maddie while I worked."

I didn't say anything else for a long while after that. Edward held my hands tightly, sensing I was getting to the hardest part. His fingers intertwined in mine calmed me, gave me the courage to go on.

"When Maddie was six months old, I was at the garage and managed to trip over a loose tire. My hands went out and I sprained my wrist on my fall. I tried to work through the pain, but it really hurt and finally I listened to Jake and took off early. It was dark already by the time I turned the truck onto our street. I remember seeing the lights on in our living room and picturing what was going on inside, Jessica watching TV or something while Maddie probably lay napping in her crib, and Paul, well Paul off somewhere as usual. I remember smiling at the thought of spending some extra time with my daughter and my friend that night."

"Oh Bella," Edward hissed through clenched teeth, his hands stiffening in mine. He'd figured it out.

"I knew Edward, as soon as I turned the key on the door, I knew. Really, I should've known sooner, and maybe on some level I did. I haven't really figured that out yet. I'm not sure if I want to figure that out, because what will it say about me? But that night, I walked in and found the living room completely empty except for my daughter lying fast asleep on a blanket on the floor, sucking soothingly on the little thumb stuck in her mouth. The sounds coming from my bedroom were pretty clear, as were the voices. But feeling calmer and more at peace than I had in a long time, I picked my daughter up from the floor and held her tightly to me, promising her that from that moment on, every decision I made would be for _her_ well-being, not to prove some point about how I could do it all. I didn't care about broken promises anymore, or about proving my mother wrong, or about the rumors and gossip that would spread around town like wildfire this time. All I cared about was Maddie, and that somehow, I'd give her a better life than I'd given her up to that point. I'd messed things up so badly, but I was going to do right by her from then on. She was still asleep, so I carried her with me as I made my way to my bedroom, and I wasn't at all surprised when I saw her on top of him, both of them so lost in their actions that it took them a couple of minutes to even realize I was standing there, watching.

"Holy hell Bella, I wanna kill him. I swear to God, if I ever meet him, I'm gonna fucking kill him," Edward growled, closing his eyes and shaking his head slowly from side to side, as if struggling to keep his control. When he finally opened his eyes again, they were blacker than the night outside. Unable to compose himself, he got up and walked quickly to the window, keeping his back to me. Nevertheless, I could see his shoulders rising and falling from his ragged breathing, his hands fisted rigidly at his sides.

I swallowed and shook my head. "It's not worth it Edward. It's all in the past." I said quietly, calmly. "Honestly, it didn't even hurt as much as I thought it would. I realized then that I'd stopped loving Paul a long time ago, and as messed up as it'll probably sound, my first thought when they finally saw me there, the shock in his eyes making Jessica turn around quickly, was that I'd have to find another babysitter now. How messed up is that?" I asked.

Edward turned around and looked at me, his eyes searching mine. In two quick strides he was seated at my side again. He shook his head, his hands moving up to my shoulders, gripping me hard. I couldn't look at him. "Bella you should've never had to go through any of that. That guy, Paul, he had no idea, no idea how lucky he was. He was a fucking idiot and the regret he must've felt-"

I snorted. "There was no regret Edward," I said, looking back up at him. "He just lay there, naked and expressionless once the initial shock wore off, staring at me while Jessica rolled off of him and gathered up her underwear, crying and telling me how sorry _she_ was. But him, he just stared at me, with no apology or regret in his eyes. And the truth is that's probably the same look I was giving him. His actions freed me, as sick as that sounds. They helped me realize that I _was_ living a dead end life. I probably should've thanked him at that moment," I laughed. Edward didn't laugh back.

"I moved back in with Charlie. By that time he'd grown pretty close to the Clearwater widow, and after I'd settled in she and my dad took over watching Maddie while I worked. Moving back home cut down on some of the bills, and with Jake paying me more now anyways, I was able to cut my work hours enough so that I could go back to school part-time. My relationship with Jake improved again with Paul permanently out of the picture now, but knowing he felt more than I did, well that kind of put a wrench in things. He offered…" I hesitated, changing my mind about sharing this part and biting down on my lip - hard. The look on Edward's face let me know he'd caught my hesitation.

His finger came up to my lip, releasing it from my teeth. "He offered…" he prompted with a raised eyebrow.

I sighed. "He offered to take care of Maddie and me," I said vaguely, "but…I told him it wasn't a good idea, that I loved him, but not the way…the way…"

"The way he loves you," Edward finished for me.

"He doesn't really love me Edward," I said quickly, taking his hands back into mine. "He just thinks he does. He's had to rescue me so many times that his feelings for me are all a tangled mess."

"Whether it's real or not," Edward said in a low, even voice, "the fact is he wants you."

I looked down and didn't answer.

"Does he call you _every_ night?" he asked in a steady voice, referring to tonight's phone call.

I shook my head. "Not every night."

Edward didn't say anything else. When I met his eyes, he was watching me intently. I drew in a shaky breath and finished my story. "I filed for divorce a few months after I moved out. Maddie was one by then." I squeezed Edward's hands. "This is where things get tricky."

Edward arched his eyebrows. "_This_ is where things get tricky?"

I rolled my eyes. "The day before we were supposed to meet for mediation, I got a phone call from Paul. I hadn't spoken to him since the day of the incident. I'd heard he'd gotten a job up at the casino in Hoquiam, Jessica had moved in with him or something, but he'd never stopped by to see Maddie, or sent any money for her expenses. Jake used to get pissed off, tell me that I should make him give me some money for Maddie at least, but I didn't want anything from him that he didn't want to give voluntarily. I wasn't asking for alimony, but with the divorce now we'd have to figure out child support payments anyway. So he tells me over the phone that he has no plans to show up at mediation the next day. That he doesn't want a divorce. That whatever happened was in the past and that I needed to get over it. I was his wife and he wasn't ready to let me go."

"Mother fucker," Edward growled, lowering his head and letting go of one of my hands to fist his hand at his side again. He exhaled loudly, one large gust of air through pursed lips.

"I was so angry Edward. I yelled at him, told him that was tough shit. I wanted a divorce, I didn't love him anymore. If things hadn't worked out between him and Jessica that wasn't my problem. It was over. And that's when he…"

Edward cursed under his breath. "That's when he what Bella?" he asked furiously.

I took a quick breath. "He said that if I insisted on suing him for divorce, he'd counter-sue. He'd claim infidelity; say that Jake was Maddie's father. He'd ask for DNA testing if I asked for child support, and drag me through the mud. The whole town would know our drama."

"Jesus Christ!" Edward growled, punching himself in the leg with his fisted hand. "What kind of fucking man is this guy?"

"Relax Edward," I said, bringing my hands up to cup his face. His nostrils were flaring, his jaw was so rigid it looked like a perfect square. "Are you okay?" I asked him, concerned. "Should I stop?"

"No!" he growled. "Tell. Me. Everything."

I nodded tensely, picking up his fisted hand so he wouldn't hurt himself. Hesitantly, I continued. "Well…the thing is, he wouldn't have just been dragging me through the mud, would he? He'd involved Jake now. And the whole time Paul _knew_. He _knew_ he was Maddie's father. Just like he knew I wouldn't want to drag Jake into my mess. He had me."

A string of expletives escaped from between Edward's lips.

"But Jake found out anyway. My dad had overheard my phone conversation with Paul, and well, by this time he wasn't staying out of things so much anymore. Jake wouldn't let me back down. He said he didn't care what they said about him, if the whole town wanted to believe he was a home wrecker that was their god-damned problem. So we went through with everything. And Paul made good on his threats. I got a letter from the Clallam County Courthouse, similar to the one I received a few weeks ago?" I reminded Edward. He nodded, the veins in his neck popping out. "Except this one said Mr. Forrester was requesting a DNA examination to be performed on the child in order to determine whether he needed to pay child support, but the thing is…the thing is a regular DNA exam wouldn't prove that he was Maddie's father. Because…because…

"Because he and Jake share DNA."

"Yes."

More expletives.

"So not only did my baby need to be pricked for her blood, now so did Jake, because they needed to do some special exams, comparing his blood and Paul's, and then Maddie's to both. And the whole damn time, Paul knew the truth." Tears of anger gathered at the corners of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Not anymore. "The day I sat at the lab, holding Maddie's chubby little arm out so that the technician could prick it and determine that Paul Forrester was indeed her biological father, Maddie started crying and crying uncontrollably. And Edward, Maddie doesn't cry that way. Even as a baby, she was never like that. But her loud sobs were making me cry. By the time the technician tied the tourniquet over her little arm, we were both bawling our eyes out. And then I started thinking" – despite my efforts, one solitary tear rolled down my face as I recounted this part – "_Why_ am I doing this? Why am I putting my daughter through this? Why am I putting my best friend through this? Why am I trying to prove that a man that's _never_ shown Maddie any affection, that's never even acknowledged her existence, is her father? For what? For his surname? For a paycheck every month? Because that's all it would get me. That's all it would ever get _her_. I shoved the technician's hand away before she could stick my daughter's arm and ran out of there as fast as my legs could carry us."

"The next day I got a lawyer, re-filed the paperwork, included paperwork to change Maddie's surname to Swan, to terminate Paul's rights since Maddie's paternity remained undetermined, waived any rights to alimony _or_ child support and refused a DNA test. Paul must've finally realized I was serious about ending things, and gave up. I guess in the end, he figured it wasn't worth it. The divorce went through, I'd thought the termination papers went through, and I didn't hear from him again until a few weeks ago. But I got tired of everyone's crooked stares. Not just towards me, but the way they'd look at Maddie and sneer and whisper, especially if I was out with Jake. I didn't care what they said about me, but when it came to Maddie, and Jake. And then Jake…"- I sighed - "Jake wouldn't move on. He put his whole life on hold for me, for Maddie, waiting for something that was never going to happen. I finished school, Rosalie showed up in Washington one day and well, you know the rest."

For a long time after that, Edward held on to me, his eyes intently focused on our joined hands, on the way his thumb rubbed against the palm of my hand, an action meant to soothe me but which I was starting to suspect was keeping him grounded. He took slow, deep breaths. What was he thinking? Was everything I'd told him too much? Had he decided I had too much baggage? After a while, I couldn't take the silence anymore. I reached out and took his other hand, unraveling his wound up fingers one by one and slipping mine in between. Finally, I forced myself into his line of vision.

"Tell me what's going through your mind right now," I breathed anxiously, my heart thumping louder than the pounding rain outside.

After a few seconds, he drew in a deep breath and brought his eyes to mine. They were clouded with anger. His voice was rough when he spoke. "I'm trying to understand how any man, especially a man that'd taken vows to love and cherish you, could've treated you with so little respect, but I'm just not getting it. I'm trying to squash this overwhelming urge to catch the next flight to Washington and hunt down that piece of shit ex-husband of yours and…" - He closed his eyes and shook his head back and forth, opening them back up slowly – "I'm trying to tell myself that a man that was able to father the little girl sleeping soundly in her bed right now" – his eyes moved towards Maddie's bedroom – "must have one redeeming quality," – he turned back to me, puzzled – "but I can't for the life of me see what it is."

"_She_ is his redeeming quality," I said. "Unfortunately for him, he'll never know that. He'll never know the joy of being her father, and that's his loss." I shrugged.

"I wish," he began, "I wish you would've gone to Dartmouth. Maybe then…maybe you and I…"

I shook my head. "Edward, remember what I said before? I used to think that too. I used to wonder what my life would've been like had I never met Paul. But that was all before I had Maddie. No matter what, I wouldn't change having met Paul, because it brought me to Maddie, and I wouldn't give up one day of my life as her mother."

"Maybe _I_ could've…" Edward began, but then stopped. When he spoke again, the words left him in a rush. "Bella I know you've been hurt and lied to, and now I understand why you didn't let me explain those damn pictures last week-"

"Edward," I tried to interrupt, but he wouldn't let me. Instead he brought his hands to my hips, holding me tightly.

"I won't try to explain it because I know you don't want to hear it, you've heard enough excuses in your life. But I need you to know Bella", - he swallowed thickly, his eyes boring into mine with a burning intensity – "You need to know that since the day I met you, since that day I saw you standing in the office, there's been no one else but you. Not physically, not emotionally…_you_ have been everywhere and everything. And damn it, I tried to fight it because I knew from the start I wasn't good enough. But when I saw you at Alice and Jasper's party I knew I couldn't stay away from you, so I told myself I'd just be your friend, but I don't want to be just friends Bella. I _know_ I'm probably the last thing you need right now and I _know_ you deserve better, but I can't fight what I feel or what I need and what I need is…I need…I…"

I grabbed his face between my hands and pulled myself up, kneeling on my legs, my face hovering over his. We were so close I could feel his ragged breath on my lips. The storm outside had moved closer, a barrage of booms echoing in the night sky, so close on the heels of the preceding fire bolts that they resounded not just against the building, but deep within my heart.

"Edward, listen to me. _You are_ _not_ the last thing I need. I…" I was breathing hard, my lips hovering just over his while his eyes drank me in, "I need you too. So much."

One large flash of light illuminated the dark apartment, shining light into Edward's smoldering eyes. A clasp of thunder followed half a second later, and in that half a second Edward pulled me by my hips and brought my upper body flush against him, his mouth enveloping mine completely. My arms went around his neck and he leaned back against the couch, pulling me back with him. I hovered right over his lap, barely holding my bottom half off of him with one leg folded on either side of his. And as his lips pulled on mine, his hands traveled under the bottom of my shirt, fanning themselves across the heated skin on my bare back, igniting a scorching blaze up and down my spine. I moaned into his mouth and he gripped me tighter, his mouth everywhere at once, licking my lips, leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses along my jaw and moving down to my neck, nipping and sucking the tender skin along my collarbone while my eyes literally rolled to the back of my head.

"Oh God Edward," I moaned, digging my hands into his soft hair, which just served to make him even more frenzied, and his hands moved higher on my back, just over my bra strap. As he continued to lick and taste my collarbone, my shoulders, my neck, I picked my head up to give him better access and my hands trailed down to his almost bare shoulders, feeling the hard, tight ripples of his upper arms. God he was so hard, so strong, and suddenly his shoulders weren't the only hard thing on his body. I could feel the bulge growing right under me, grazing me where I still hovered over him. I struggled to think while I still had working brain cells. _How_ _far would this go tonight? How far would_ _I let it go? _Because I knew it was all up to me.

But Edward's lips and tongue were persistent against my over-heated skin, his hands exploring and caressing every inch of my bare back, and I needed more. It had been so, so long, and God, it had _never_ been like this.

Clutching his hair and pulling in impossibly closer, I slowly lowered myself, coming to a full rest on top of Edward. We froze; my mind and body reeling from the indescribable warmth spreading throughout my thighs and concentrating itself in all the right places; places I hadn't thought of for so long. Edward hissed, his lips stilling against my neck before exhaling slowly and blowing his warm breath on me, over my neck and shoulders. I closed my eyes, reveling in the awakened sensations building inside. My hands went back to the sides of his face and brought his lips back to mine, plunging my tongue deep into his mouth where it was quickly met by his, twisting and turning together while the most sensitive parts of our bodies began the instinctive age-old dance against each other.

"Ohhh," I moaned into his mouth.

"Bellaaa," Edward breathed against me, his lips refusing to release mine for an instant. His fingers traced the line of my spine before moving out to trail slowly up and down my sides, just barely grazing the sides of my bra and what lay underneath. A sound somewhere between a squeal and a whimper escaped my lips. Trailing back down, his thumbs dipped slowly just inside the elastic of my sweat pants.

Any rational thinking was quickly on its way out. The inferno burning inside my body blazed hotter and hotter, the flames promising to engulf me and all forms of reason. The feel of Edward surrounding me, holding me, under me, was too much. Too much and not enough all at once. Think Bella, think! I commanded myself, even as our tongues and bodies continued dancing against each other and my hands trailed lower down his arms, tracing the indentations of his muscles and finally moving to the front of his chest, where they dipped below his tank and traced the smooth, hard surface of his concrete abs. He gasped into my mouth, his stomach contracting tightly under my hand. I moaned again, instinctively grinding deeper into him, searching for a release to the insatiable burn right _there_. Too much and not enough.

"Bella," Edward breathed again against my lips. "Tell me you feel it. Tell me you feel this…between us. It can't…It can't just be me," he moaned. "It can't…" Apparently I wasn't the only one struggling with coherency.

At first I thought he meant the bulge that continued to grow just where our bodies where joined. Of course I felt that, I'd have to be dead not to feel that. It grew bigger and harder by the second until I was beginning to think it might need its own zip code. But then I realized that wasn't what he meant. He meant the magnetic pull between us, the electricity, the connection; the need for each other on so much more than just a physical level.

I brought my hands up to his face again, pulling him away from me momentarily so that I could look into his burning eyes when I answered. "I feel it Edward. I've felt it for so long…but I tried to fight it too," I openly admitted.

"Please don't fight it anymore," he pleaded in a strained voice, the open and vulnerable look in his eyes spearing me with a fresh burst of warmth.

"I'm not…I can't," I promised fervently, almost unintelligibly, before bringing my mouth back down to his. He kissed me softly, tracing my lips with his tongue before taking my bottom lip between his. His hips, which had been driving me crazy with their insistent movement, suddenly stilled under me.

_No, please don't stop. Please don't stop!_ I wanted to beg, but I was beyond words.

"I need you to tell me what you want," he suddenly said, his breath shaky, his voice rough and ragged against my lips. Slowly, I opened my eyes and saw that his dark eyes held a question. "Tell me how far…"

_The_ million dollar question. How far? The answer seemed so simple on the surface. The physical and emotional connection between us was undeniable, almost unstoppable; it would probably take the jaws of life to pull me off of Edward right now. And for goodness' sake, I was on top of the man, with his considerable manhood unquestionably digging into me. But Edward was somehow thinking clearly enough for the both of us to at least ask the question.

With Edward stilled under me, I fought the burning urge to move against him and forced myself to listen to the little voices in my head. They were taking a vote, and in my mind I could see them like a little group of people crowded together on a large green, sunny lawn, yelling yeah and ney, in favor or opposed. I could clearly hear the overwhelming yeahs for the decision, and my heart - as well as other parts of me - did a little happy dance in gratitude to my large group of supporters.

But…but deep in the back of the crowd, hidden behind the much louder and verbal voters and fighting to make herself heard over the rest of the overly-excited group, lay one tiny little voice. She was being bullied as the rest of the supporters to my cause tried to silence her, but she fought hard, jumping and yelling and screaming; waving her little arms desperately to be seen over the jumping and dancing of the rest of the crowd, until finally - and pretty begrudgingly I might add - I saw her. I saw her and couldn't pretend she wasn't there anymore.

'_Not yet, not yet, not yet!_' she screamed over and over again, her poor little voice hoarse from all her screams.

Still breathing hard, I brought my lips down to Edward's neck, kissing him as softly as he kissed me, tasting the sweetness of the scent I'd been inhaling for weeks now, clean and manly and musky. Through the thin material of our shirts, I could feel his heart beating against mine. He sighed into my neck as I brought my lips to his ear, kissing his soft lobe.

"I can't do it with you," I blurted, cringing as soon as the words were out of my mouth. I looked up quickly. The shock in his green eyes was enough to abruptly cool down my over-heated body.

"Oh God, that made so much more sense in my mind," I groaned.

"Well, I'm glad it made sense in someone's mind," he joked. I cringed again and moved off of his lap, sitting next to him with my legs folded under me, my hands folding and unfolding nervously on my lap now.

"Hey, hey, hey," he murmured, taking my hands into his and kissing my palms sweetly. "Relax," he added in his velvety soothing voice. "Now, just to make sure we're all on the same page here, by 'it' you do mean-"

"Sex," I finished. He gaped at me. "Look, it's not that I don't trust you…" I sighed, pulling my hands out of his and covering my face.

"Uhm, well, I guess anyone can get used to a monk's life," I heard him say. "I mean, monks go without, most priests and nuns go without, and hey, I'll still have my hands, right?"

"What? No! Wait!" I cried, uncovering my face and looking at him. He was watching me with an amused grin. I smacked his arm and he chuckled. "I didn't mean never!"

He sighed in relief. "I've gotta tell you; I was really hoping that wasn't the case."

I smirked at him. "Edward, the truth is I haven't done _that_ in a really, _really_ long time." He arched an eyebrow curiously. "Since…since before Maddie was born."

His jaw practically hit the floor.

"You mean," –he swallowed- "You mean you've only ever been with…"

"With Paul, yes," I confirmed.

Silence. He ran his hand through his hair. "Damn," he said after a while. He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "Damn," he said again.

I pursed my lips, crossing my arms in front of me. "What's so 'damn' about that?" I asked, mimicking his voice. "So I've only ever been with one man, so what?" I shot defensively. "Exactly how many women have you been with in your life, Mr. Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy?"

As soon as the question was out of my mouth, I wasn't so sure I wanted to know the answer. But the way his eyes shot back to me, the dark, clouded look in his eyes, made me think he was even less anxious to share than I was to hear.

He forced a smile and said, "Can I refrain from answering that on the grounds that my answer may negatively affect the afore-mentioned waiting period here?" His tone was teasing, but the darkness in his eyes didn't match his forced levity.

I nodded quickly, and then to distract myself from wondering how high his actual magic number went and how that would make me feel, and especially from the little voice in the back of my mind who was now talking about notches and bedposts, I started explaining myself.

"I haven't been with a man in a long time Edward, and honestly, I'm more than a little nervous about it," I wrung my hands together anxiously while Edward gazed at me patiently. "I mean, the last time I had sex we had a different man running this country and Pluto was still considered a planet. I just don't think I'm ready for it up here" - I tapped my temple with a finger - "right now. I plan to be, I _hope_ to be," – I smiled – "some time in the near future, but right now-"

His lips quickly covered mine, keeping me from finishing my sentence. The way his mouth moved over mine, softly and sweetly, the way he gently cradled my head between his two strong hands, assured me that he understood, or at least accepted what I was telling him. He parted my lips slowly with his tongue, pushing me back into the couch but keeping his weight off of me this time. He was taking us back a step, to second base, and although my mind was grateful, the rest of my body craved the feel of him from before. The warm, tingling feeling that had lay dormant inside of me for so long had been awakened now, and it wasn't ready for a nap. And when his mouth trailed open kisses back and forth between my jaw and my ear, my body felt more than willing to skip all the bases and round for home.

But Edward's warm mouth reached right under my ear, and in a soft low voice he murmured, "Bella, you don't need to explain yourself to me love." His lips grazed my earlobe and I couldn't help leaning into his mouth. He chuckled softly. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't want you really, really badly. I mean, you just felt how badly I want you." His words made me shudder. "But I want so much more from you than just 'it'," he teased, kissing the spot right under my ear. His breath blew so hot in my ear that I had to reach out and grab onto the sides of his hair to ground myself, fisting his soft, silky hair between my fingers. I thought I heard him groan lightly before he continued.

"I'll wait as long as you need me to," he murmured softly, moving his hands to my hips, slowly trailing them up my sides, over my arms, until they covered my hands – still fisted in his hair. He squeezed them tightly, making me fist his hair harder. This time his groan was much more pronounced. I got the distinct feeling he enjoyed me pulling on his hair. Very, very much.

He placed his mouth on mine again, kissing me softly, reverently.

"As long as I can kiss you," he breathed, his lips still on mine. I nodded, unable to speak. "As long as I can hold you," he continued, trailing his hands down to my hips again. I managed to nod again. "Then I'll wait however long it takes for your beautiful brain" – his lips trailed heated kisses up to my temple – "to be as ready for 'it' as the rest of you is." I shuddered again, fisting his hair hard.

He groaned. "Unghhh. But Bella love, you've _gotta_ stop doing that or all bets are off." His lips moved together with mine again, and all conversation ceased until the raging storm outside – pummeling the city insistently for hours and hours - finally relented. But the raging storm indoors…well _that_ didn't relent until the early hours of the morning.

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**Hmm. Should I run and hide? **

**Reviews make me do a happy dance almost as gleeful as the one Bella's girly parts were doing. (Okay, well not that happy, but you get my meaning.)**

**Leave me love, hate, death threats, whatever you want. Would **_**you**_** have been able to put a break on it if you were Bella? Be honest!**

**And what are your thoughts on Paul?**


	18. Chapter 17 Kiss and Tell?

**A/N: Still keeping it light and fluffy for now. Letting our guys settle in with each other.**

**Thanks to my lovely Beta Danna0724 for her handiwork. She's a busy little bee but she still manages to fit me in somewhere. Thanks sweets!**

**All characters belong to S. Meyer (except for Maddie; she's all mine). I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 17 – Kiss and Tell?**

**Chapter Song Rec. – Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol**

**EPOV**

More than a couple of questions and concerns still circled around and around in my head at five in the morning, keeping me from reaching that final stage of sleep, the one where darkness rules and all thought and reflection goes out the subconscious window, pushed into a fuzzy dream-state where truths and untruths, unveiled fears and desires all mix and mesh together to create a Tim Burton-esque view of reality.

What was the most pressing concern at the moment?

Was it possible to die from blue balls, and if not necessarily die was there any chance that my two engorged buddies would swell so badly that they'd actually explode?

By pressing I meant that every time my balls pressed into the hard, uncomfortable mattress on Bella's pull-out, I'd cringe, holding in a groan. The storm that had been pummeling the city for the past twenty-four hours had finally subsided, sometime after midnight, or as I kept referring to it in my mind, 'Hour One' of my _new_ vow of celibacy; different from the past few months of celibacy because now I had myself an official girlfriend…but still no sex. And now…well now there appeared to be no end date or time on the horizon. The thought made my already ailing balls hurt even more.

Was I feeling cock-blocked? Yes.

Did I regret one second of the past few hours? Hell No.

Another image from the most fan-fucking-tastic few hours of my life popped into my head. Bella pinned under me on the sofa, her warm hands in my hair, stroking and pulling, and her soft lips – easily the softest and sweetest lips in existence - on my mouth, doing the same there. I grinned like a geeky teenager into my borrowed pillow, ignoring the swollen twin's complaints down below. Shit, you'd think I'd never been kissed before.

Well if I had to, I could deal with blue balls for a while. If it meant Bella was mine now. I could hold her, I could kiss her, I could bring her home and stay with her for a while, spend time with her and Maddie. That knowledge was enough to surpass the pain of the bluest and most swollen appendages ever. And apparently that knowledge would have to be enough, at least for the time being.

Damn. If I didn't find a way to focus on something else, I was never going to get rid of the problem down south.

I flipped over carefully, staring up at the dark ceiling. My thoughts went to everything Bella had told me tonight; about her father, about Jake, and about her prick of an ex-husband.

Paul. An unimaginable wave of rage rocked me from head to toe. I fisted two mounds of the white comforter Bella had lent me, gritting my teeth in the dark. If I ever saw Paul Forrester, if he ever came near Bella or Maddie again, one of us would be leaving the scene in a stretcher; plain and simple.

And Jake. I sighed, rolling on my side cautiously, but now the throbbing down below had subsided. I groaned quietly, because just as I'd suspected, Jake was in love with Bella. And apparently, he'd appointed himself Bella's hero and protector, a role I was pretty sure he wouldn't be too happy to relinquish. He loved her, but she was mine to take care of now, both she and Maddie; and as grateful as I may have been for everything he'd done for them before I came into the picture, I _was_ here now. It was time for Jake to get the steppin'.

My eyes glued to the dark ceiling, I blew out through one side of my mouth, moving a few stray pieces of hair off my forehead. My vision drifted to the glowing red lights of the stove in the kitchen. Five thirty-three in the morning, and still not a wink of sleep. I closed my eyes, willing my mind to go blank, but gave up again when the night kept replaying in my mind like a movie reel without end.

How the hell was I supposed to get to sleep when Bella lay just a few feet from me, snuggled warmly in her soft bed, and all I could think about was the feel of her warm lips pressed against mine, the way her mouth trailed soft, sweet kisses back and forth against my neck, the way her hands fisted into my hair, the feel of her warm body pressed against mine, and oh Jesus, the feel of _her_, right on top of my-

Fuuuck. There went my balls again. Talk about a long, hard night.

Another early morning confession: I was scared shitless here. Bella was _so_ different from any girl I'd ever met; I had no idea how to proceed with her. She was so delicate and so strong at the same time. Like a seemingly fragile rose battered by the wind and left to wither in the evening breeze, but somehow managing to survive until the next sunny morning, awakening stronger and more beautiful than ever. I shook my head, feeling the rage again as I thought of everything she'd had to go through. All these hours later I still couldn't believe it; Paul's level of stupidity. He'd _had _her. She'd been his _wife, the mother of his child _for the love of God. He'd had the chance to share things with her I couldn't even let myself dream of; not yet. And he'd thrown all that away; thrown _both_ Bella and Maddie away like two old rag dolls he didn't want or need anymore. Bella had said that he'd given up when he'd finally agreed to the divorce; that he'd realized she didn't love him anymore and had given up. I wasn't so sure about that. What man in his right mind would ever completely give up two treasures like that? A cold chill ran through my veins.

But what was _I _doing?_ I_ didn't deserve someone like Bella. If I'd ever doubted that before, her confessions last night had confirmed it. How could I ever expect her to trust me when I'd been exactly the kind of man she'd been running from?

I blew out from my mouth and closed my eyes, clearing my mind for the hundred and twentieth time in the past few hours. Again, it didn't work. The process continued for an undeterminable amount of time, as it had since Bella's eyelids had started fluttering closed at about two in the morning; her body so soft and warm in my arms as we lay tangled in each other on the sofa, mouths and lips kissing and exploring softly, that it had taken Samson-like strength to admit that she was losing the fight with sleep. As much as I'd hated it, I'd convinced her to go to bed, and after a few chaste kisses, she'd relented. And even though watching her stumble sleepily to her room had been…hard – literally - at the time I'd been sure I'd sleep like a baby, with thoughts of Bella dancing around in my head.

I'd been wrong.

I snuck another look at the clock. Five forty-two am. I sighed.

Finally, at some point the muted colors of the night began blending together behind my eyes, the red glow of the clock on the stove, the browns of the wooden bookshelves and coffee table, the deep tans of the curtains. The fading sounds around me also melded together to form a quiet chorus, lulling me into that dream state that had eluded me all night, soft horns honking in the distance, footsteps pounding the concrete floors beyond, voices carrying in the breeze…And then one soft, melodic voice above all others, singing quietly about an old man and his farm, and the strange noises his animals made…

"Edwood you stayed ovuh!" a little voice yelled in my ear, startling me back into consciousness and making me jump so that the mattress springs dug deeper into my back. Slowly, I raised my head off the pillow, forcing my eyes to focus on the source of the voice, my sleepy brain too tired to immediately place it. It only took a second. The little form standing in pink footed jammies at the foot of the pull-out smiled widely at me, her brown hair in a messy disarray and her arms folded tightly around her doll.

"Maddie," I whispered, too exhausted to make any other sound.

"You stayed, you stayed!" she cried again, jumping up and down. "Ah you gonna live with us now?"

I raised myself up on my elbows, staring down at the little girl in front of me. Still half asleep, it took me a few seconds to understand her question.

"No princess," I began; my voice thick with sleep though I hadn't gotten any. "I just had a problem with my car last night so mommy said it was okay for me to stay."

She looked disappointed by this answer. I glanced at the clock on the stove. Six twenty-seven am. Jeez, Bella hadn't been kidding about Maddie waking with the roosters.

"What are you doing up so early?" I asked.

She frowned. "It's not oughly. It's wake up time. Look," –she pointed at the window with her small finger – "the moon's going night night and the sun's going good-mowning. Mommy says that means little girls can get out of bed now."

I fought the tired and cranky urge to point out that I wasn't a little girl and maybe that rule didn't apply to me, and followed her finger to the window. The orange warmth of dawn cast a subdued light into the apartment, bathing everything in a soft glow, including the little angel in front of me. All she needed was the halo.

"Can I watch TV now?" she asked after a few seconds.

"Uh, sure."

She didn't move. I sat up.

She pointed at the pull-out. "Can I sit on theugh?"

"Oh," I answered, feeling stupid and groggy. "Sure princess." I moved over, making room for her.

She smiled up at me before flinging herself on the pull-out, her small body bouncing up and down as the thin mattress settled. She sat up, her legs curled under her the way Bella's legs had been last night while we were talking. Still clutching her doll, she looked at me expectantly, a look I'd come to know in the past twenty-four hours meant she was waiting for something.

"You need the TV turned on for you, don't you?" I asked.

"Uh-huh."

I grabbed the remote off the coffee table and turned the TV to the channel I'd come to know, also in the last twenty-four hours, was Maddie's favorite. As soon as she started singing along with some orange fuzzy character, I lowered my head back on the pillow, hoping to catch a few more z's.

Just as I felt myself drifting again, the sensation of small warm fingers against my eyelids forced me back into consciousness. I opened my eyes. Maddie's sweet face peered down at me eagerly.

"Watch TV with me," she said in her soft little voice. And as much as my body begged me to close my eyes again, I forced them to stay open, rubbing them with the palms of my hands.

I chuckled, picking my pillow up and laying it against the back of the sofa. I leaned back into it.

"So tell me what we're watching."

She shimmied closer to me. "It's Yo Gabba Gabba," she said excitedly. "DJ Lance Wock is my fayvowit." I nodded my head. Her eyes moved just behind me. "Can I shauh yo-uh pillow?"

"Course you can," I answered, moving my head over so she could rest her head on the pillow.

She laid back quickly, her long brown hair flaring out around the pillow, a few stray strands landing in my mouth. I inhaled the sweet scent coming off of her, the one that without even realizing I'd come to associate with Maddie. Similar to Bella's, but somehow sweeter, softer even. It reminded me of a fresh spring morning out jogging in Central Park, the sun's rays chasing away the chill left over from the winter, the scent of the newly blooming tulips in the air. That was Maddie; warm, pure and fresh. Her soft brown eyes danced in the sunlight pouring in from the window just behind us, the light making them sparkle like chocolate mixed with glitter.

And suddenly everything felt so…right. Like I belonged here with her, watching Saturday morning TV, sharing a pillow and listening to her sing. How could anyone not have wanted this sweet little girl? How could anyone not have thought this to be the sweetest experience?

Maddie turned and caught me gazing at her. Her brows wrinkled. "Edwood why ah you stawing at me? Mommy says it's not polite to stauh."

I brought my hand up to her hair, still soft despite its messy appearance. There was something I wanted to say, but I wasn't sure what it was. I stroked her hair softly before finally settling on,

"You smell like spring."

She giggled. "Mommy says that too." She shrugged and turned her eyes back to the TV. I gazed at her a few moments longer before turning too.

Forty-five minutes later, Bella was still asleep. After taking a trip to the bathroom to take the longest piss in the history of pisses and brush my teeth with the toothbrush Bella had left out for me, I splashed my face with cold water and ran my fingers through my hair. I sighed. What good was sex hair without the sex? Admitting the losing fight with my hair I walked back towards the living room, passing Bella's bedroom. The door was slightly ajar, and I paused for a moment, listening. I could picture her cuddled deep into her sheets, her hair splayed out all over her pillow, her feet peeking out from under the covers. It took all my self-control not to peek in and confirm the picture in my mind. Hesitantly, I dragged myself away from her door and made my way back to the living room; which was a good thing, because the princess was waiting for me.

"Edwood, dance with me!" Maddie ordered as soon as she saw me. The cold water on my face had helped wake me up. I took her little hands in mine and followed her lead, dancing to the pulsing beats of some dude dressed in an orange one-piece and a bright fluffy orange hat. The morning definitely topped the list of the strangest start to a Saturday I'd ever spent, but there you go. These were the things you did for the most important girls in your life.

After about fifteen minutes, Maddie collapsed onto the sofa, giggling happily.

"I'm hungwy now."

Twenty minutes later, Maddie and I sat at the small kitchen table, digging into warm stacks of blueberry pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon. I watched as she scarfed down a forkful of pancakes greedily, sticky globs of syrup running down her chin.

"Good?" I asked.

"Uh-huh. So yummy. Thank you Edwood," she said through a mouthful of jumbled food. I grinned. This was probably one of those places where Bella would tell her not to speak with her mouth full. But I didn't. She reached for the glass of milk I'd served her, a few drops spilling over as she brought it to her mouth unsteadily. When she pulled the glass away, she'd added a thin line of frothy milk to the items sticking to her face. I fought back a chuckle.

"Ah you gonna spend the day with me and mommy today?" she asked.

"Maybe. We'll have to see what mommy has planned." I had no idea how Bella wanted to handle our relationship in front of Maddie. Were we going to tell Maddie she and I were- What exactly _were_ we?

"I want to go to the pahk with you today." My eyes turned to the small window over the sink. Small rays of bright sun bathed the kitchen in daylight; the rain and high winds of yesterday a long gone memory.

"Tell me about that picture you drew," I asked, changing the subject.

Maddie glanced over at the picture that lay on the table beside her, crayons spread out in a semi-circle around it. This picture was similar to the one she'd drawn in my office yesterday for Bella; a man, a woman and a little girl, with the letters M F written out in shaky penmanship under it.

Maddie shrugged, putting away another bite of food. "It's me, you and mommy," she said matter-of-factly.

"What does this spell?" I asked curiously, pointing at the letters.

"Silly," she said with a giggle, as if it should've been completely obvious. "It says 'my fam-'"

"Well good morning." Bella's voice fluttered in from behind me. I turned around and found her standing at the threshold between the kitchen and the living room, her eyes bouncing curiously between Maddie and me.

"Mommy!" Maddie cried happily. "I was hungwy so Edwood made me bwekfast." She bounced up and down in her seat.

Bella smiled, her brows plucking up in surprise. Her eyes darted to the clock on the stove.

"Oh my God! I didn't realize it was so- Maddie sweetie why didn't you come get me when you woke up?"

"I was playing and watching TV with Edwood. And then he made me pantates!" she repeated, shoving another big bite in her mouth to illustrate her point.

Bella turned sheepish eyes to me. "Edward, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize it was so late. I hope Maddie didn't wake you." She took a few steps forward, looking from me to Maddie and back.

I got up from the table, taking the remaining steps to her. My hands cupped her face and I placed a kiss on her forehead. What I really wanted was to plant one on her mouth and play with her tongue, but I didn't think that would be a good idea in front of Maddie.

"Good morning to you too," I said, my mouth turned up in a grin. "It's not late at all, and we didn't wake you because we were doing well on our own, and besides, you went to bed pretty late last night…" Bella smiled, blushing a deep shade of red. "We watched TV for a while and then we got hungry, so I made breakfast," I added with a careless shrug. "As soon as you're ready I'll crack some eggs and get your pancakes going."

"Oh no. You don't have to do that," she exclaimed through wide eyes. "I can do it myself."

I rolled my eyes, letting go of her face and picking up her hands in mine, swinging them between us. "Are we going to do this again?"

She stared at me for a moment, before letting go of one of my hands. Covering her mouth she said, "I've got to go brush my teeth, but I'll be right back then?"

I chuckled and let go of her hand. "Everything'll be ready when you come back."

Ten minutes later, as I was plating Bella's pancakes, eggs and bacon, I heard her soft footsteps come up behind me. She put her head on my shoulder, peeking over me on her tip toes.

"That looks and smells delicious. Thank you," she murmured quietly, her words doing interesting things to the fine hairs on my neck.

I put the pan down and turned towards her. "You're welcome," I said cheerily. I snuck a look towards Maddie. She'd finished her breakfast and had moved back to the TV. Quickly I leaned down and planted a few quick kisses on Bella's lips.

"Mmm, minty." I said, licking my lips. She giggled and took the plate from me greedily.

"Mmm," Bella moaned, sitting at the kitchen table. "Edward these pancakes are delicious." She shoveled her pancakes down almost as fast as Maddie had.

I chuckled, loving the way these girls ate. "I'm glad you're enjoying them. They're Esme's secret recipe. Maybe if you behave I'll share it with you one of these days," I teased her, reaching out to play with a few loose strands of hair hanging by her eyes.

"I thought I behaved myself pretty well last night," she teased back, watching me with a mischievous smile before slowly putting a big bite of eggs in her mouth. Shit. There went my problem down below. It was going to be a long, _hard_ day if even watching her eat breakfast was going to get me worked up. I shifted in my seat.

"Well, well Ms. Swan, aren't we feeling playful this morning?" I took her free hand in mine.

"I feel…pretty good this morning," she agreed. When she finished, she pushed her empty plate away and glancing in Maddie's direction, reached out and took my other hand.

"Maybe it's because I slept in for the first time in years. Or maybe it's something else…"

"Mmhm," I murmured. "I vote for the something else."

She chuckled. "Seriously, thanks for breakfast. It was dee-lish. I can't remember the last time someone made me a warm breakfast. I think I may have been Maddie's age." She looked over at Maddie again, a soft smile on her lips.

"No one's ever made you breakfast Bella?"

She shrugged.

I pursed my lips. "Well get used to it. Because it'll be happening pretty often from now on."

She lifted one eyebrow. It took me a second to realize why.

"Not that I'm inviting myself to sleep over all the time from now on. I just meant that, I mean, whenever you want-" – her lips were twitching – "I just meant I'll cook for you whenever you want."

She laughed out loud, attracting a long, curious stare from Maddie, whose eyes went straight to our hands. She looked from me to her mother before wordlessly turning her attention back to the TV.

"So what are we telling her?" I asked, lifting up one set of hands to show her what I meant.

Bella shrugged. "I haven't really figured that out yet. I have to give it some thought. This is all new to me and it'll be new to her."

I nodded. Personally, I got the feeling Maddie would be fine with me and her mom, and I was going to tell her just that before my cell phone rang. Begrudgingly, I let go of one of Bella's hands to pull it out of my pants pocket.

"It's Jasper," I said, hitting the SEND button. I'd called him and left a message on his voice mail this morning.

"Jazz man, thanks for calling me back."

"'Sup Edward? What're you doin' callin' so early? Al told me you were braving the subways last night. You just gettin' home?"

I glanced at Bella, who'd gotten up to clear her dishes. "I'll just clean up," she whispered, moving towards the sink.

I turned my attention back to Jasper. "Actually uh, I'm at Bella's."

"At Bella's? What're you doin' there so early? You sleep over or somethin'?" he chortled, joking. I didn't answer. "Wait, _did_ you sleep over?"

"Jazz," I mumbled, glancing up at Bella. She had her back to me as she moved around the small kitchen cleaning up the bowls and pans I'd used to make breakfast this morning.

"Holy shit, you _did_ sleep over!" Jasper screeched. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply.

"Jasper, it's not-"

"Hey Al," I heard him scream away from the phone.

"No Jasper," I hissed as quietly as I could, standing up quickly and moving into the living room. "Don't tell-"

"Guess what? Edward slept over Bella's last night!"

The screech was audible throughout all of Brooklyn. Things were dropped and feet scurried and the phone seemed to be shuffled around before Jasper's muffled complaints disappeared and a squeaky voice came over the phone.

"Hold up. You slept over Bella's last night?"

"Alice don't make this into a big deal-"

"Are you freakin' kidding me? Don't make this into a big deal? Don't make this into a big deal?" she screeched before giving another loud squeal. I pulled the phone away from my ear. "This is the biggest deal ever!" Another screech. "Tell. Me. Everything."

"Are you fucking kidding me? What are we, in high school?" I hissed, glancing from Maddie to Bella. The first was sitting quietly on the floor playing with some dolls, the second loading the dishwasher. Her eyes met mine for just an instant before turning back to the dishes. "Mind your damn business," I hissed at Alice as low as possible.

Alice was quiet for a few moments. "Wow," she finally said in a surprisingly subdued tone. "No kiss and tell? This _must_ be serious." I rolled my eyes but didn't answer. "No matter," she continued in a nonchalant tone. "We just got home from the Plaza and I _was_ going to take a nap. But I think I'll just go pay Bella a visit instead."

"Alice!" I warned. As usual, she dismissed me with a giggle.

"Alice!"

"See you in a few big brother!" she screeched again, before giving another squeal and handing the phone back to Jasper.

Jasper chuckled into the receiver.

"Thanks a fucking lot," I growled quietly.

"Sorry man," he laughed.

I sighed. "Look, can you do me a favor? I need you to pick me up and take me to get the Volvo. It got impounded last night."

I walked back into the kitchen after hanging up with Jasper. Bella was standing by the sink. I snaked my arms around her waist, pulling her in against my chest.

"Jasper's coming to pick me up so I can go get the car." I buried my head into her hair, inhaling deeply. "Damn you smell good."

She put the kitchen towel down and brought her hands to mine, turning in my arms. Her expression was uneasy. "So uhm, okay then. I guess I'll see you Monday?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Had enough of me already?"

"No!" she answered, shaking her head quickly. "I just," – she exhaled heavily, "Edward, I have no idea what I'm doing here," she confessed looking down and slumping her shoulders. "I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing, or saying."

I placed a finger under her chin, lifting her eyes to me. "Just do what you feel. Say what you feel. If you've got things to do, that's fine." It really wasn't, but what else could I say?

She was quiet for a few seconds, squinting her eyes and studying me. "Would it sound crazy if I said I don't want you to go yet?" she finally said, looking at me from under her eyelashes.

I smiled. "No, because I don't want to go yet."

I pulled her into my arms then. The feel of her warm body against mine was mind blowing on so many levels.

"Mommy, Edwood ah we going to the pahk?" a little voice asked impatiently. We froze. Bella was the first to react. Carefully she peeled herself away from me, clearing her throat. She knelt down to Maddie's level.

"Maddie, Edwood and I-"

"Edwood said we could go to the pahk if you said it was okay."

Bella looked up at me with unsure eyes.

"Hey, how 'bout we go to the Zoo today, how does that sound? Have you been to the Zoo in Central Park yet Maddie?" I asked.

She shook her head vigorously, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Well then, I vote for the Zoo."

Maddie looked from me to her mother with a pleading expression.

Bella smiled and shrugged. "If that's what you'd like to do today."

"Yay!" Maddie cried, running out of the kitchen. "I'm going to see the lions and tiguhs and penguins!"

We both looked after her, chuckling.

"You know, I think we're making a bigger deal out of this" - I signaled between us with my hand - "than Maddie is. She's been watching us holding hands and hugging all morning and it doesn't seem to faze her."

"You might be right," she snorted in a 'go figure' sort of way. "Maybe we should just play it by ear with her."

Half an hour later, the doorbell buzzed, one long buzz followed by a few short, impatient ones. Continuous until Bella anxiously pressed on the Answer button. Not surprisingly, a few loud squeals followed by unintelligible gibberish confirmed it was Alice. Bella buzzed her in while I put my shoes and shirt back on. Jesus I craved a shower. Running my hand through my hair, I stood up and walked towards the door, blocking it with my body.

"I've gotta warn you. Alice is making a big deal out of the fact that I spent the night here."

Bella came to stand next to me. "What exactly did you tell her?" she asked with a curious grin.

"Nothing. That's the problem."

Bella laughed. "Don't worry about Alice. I can handle her."

Impatient banging on the door. "I hope so," I mumbled, refusing to move away from the door.

Bella laughed again and pulled me away from the door, opening it to reveal my sister and future brother-in-law. Alice looked as if she would explode any moment. Jasper just looked amused.

Pushing past me without a second glance, Alice pulled Bella aside. "Lucy, you got some 'splainin' to do."

Bella gave me a sideways glance that said 'here we go.'

"You ready?" Jasper asked calmly. "I've got the car double-parked so we've gotta book."

Feeling guilty about leaving Bella with Crazy, I walked over to where Alice had her cornered and pulled her away.

"You okay?"

"We'll be fine. Alice and I are just going to have some girl talk while you guys are out." She winked at me conspiratorially.

I frowned. "You don't have to talk to her about anything Bella."

She laughed and Alice growled. "Hey, what part of girl talk don't you understand? We're girlfriends; that's what girlfriends do!" She stuck her tongue out at me and blew loudly. Jesus, she was childish.

I turned back to Bella and raised one hand to her long hair, running my fingers through it.

"I'll be back in about an hour. I'm just going to pick up the car and then I'll come pick you and Maddie up?"

Her face broke out in a wide grin. "Sounds like a plan."

And even though I was still dying to shove my tongue in her mouth, I controlled myself in front of our audience; Alice's eyes were so focused on me they were practically drilling a hole in my brain. Instead of a hot and heavy kiss, I slowly bent my head down and gave her a soft kiss on her cheek.

"I'll see you in a little while okay?"

"Okay," she answered quietly. We gazed at each other for a few moments. I didn't want to leave, and by the way she held my hand, I didn't think Bella wanted me to leave either.

"Oh Jesus Christ, will you just go already?" Alice rolled her eyes and moaned. She walked over and pulled me by my free hand, dragging me towards the door with her abnormally strong little body. I held on to Bella's hand as long as possible, but let go before Alice dragged us both out the door.

"Go, go, go," she commanded, pushing me and Jasper out. "Jasper honey, don't rush. I'll meet you back home later," she ordered, before slamming the door on us.

The ride to the impound lot was pretty quiet at first. The radio's music filled the silence as I tapped out a beat on my leg with my hand, gazing out the windshield with a smile on my face.

"So?" Jasper finally asked, halfway to the lot.

"So what?" I answered, still smiling to myself.

"So you and Bella huh?"

I rolled my eyes. No wonder he and Alice were together. Peas in a pod, those two.

I rubbed the back of my neck with the palm of my hand, unable to suppress a wide grin. "Yeah, me and Bella…"

"Wow," he said quietly. After a pause, "Well, the rest of the family's already in love with her..."

It struck me like a rogue thunderbolt left over from yesterday's storm. Love? Where had that come from? I mean, yeah, whatever it was I felt for Bella was different, so much more than I'd ever felt for any girl, but…love? Suddenly my hands were shaking and my pulse was beating loudly in my ears. I rubbed my hands back and forth on my lap nervously, wiping away the sweat that was accumulating on them now.

Love? Is that…was that…love?

I'd missed Jasper's last few comments.

"…because you know, it might get awkward."

I shook my head quickly, trying to clear it.

"What?"

Jasper gave me a side-long glance and frowned. "I asked if you two were planning on going public right away."

"Sure, I guess. Why wouldn't we?"

"No reason, just asking is all." But the look on his face made me think that there were very specific reasons. Perhaps I should've pressed him, but I didn't.

Fifty minutes and two hundred dollars later, I buzzed Bella's doorbell, anxious to get back to her and Maddie. When she opened her door, a wide smile graced her perfect lips; she looked as relieved to see me as I was to be back. She'd taken a shower, her dark hair hung even darker and still damp; the smell of sweet strawberries even more potent than usual. She'd changed into a blue thermal top that hugged her in all the right places and a pair of dark navy skinny jeans tucked into brown shin-length boots. I took her in my arms - lifting her off the floor by her waist - right there at the door, unable to hold off any longer. She gasped in surprise and flung her arms around my neck with a giggle and when our mouths met, it wasn't the chaste kisses of the morning any more. The half-open door blocked us from view of any curious little eyes inside and my tongue immediately sought out hers, twisting around it with the desperation of a man who's been deprived for too long. Her hands snaked into the hair in the back of my head, which she fucking knew drove me crazy. I let out a low groan and pulled her even closer into me, her chest pressed up tightly against mine. I could feel the warmth of her and the soft roundness of her breasts through her shirt, and it was all I could do not to press my bottom half against her, because I wasn't so sure she'd object, and I still wasn't sure where my strength to stop last night had come from, or that I could recall that self-control again if needed. It was late morning and as I recalled, Maddie would be napping soon. But Bella had already said she wasn't ready, and I needed to respect that, no matter how hard it was. And damn it, _it_ _was hard_.

Eventually our mouths slowed down against each other; desperate, frenzied tongues turned into soft, languid kisses, nipping and licking, until we both sighed, the relief on both sides evident by the long, deep breaths we finally took.

"God I love kissing you," I admitted with a low growl, resting my forehead on hers.

"Mmm, me too," she murmured dreamily through half-lidded eyes, our lips punctuating each sentence with another kiss.

"Hey Bella, is that Edward?" came an annoying voice from just beyond the door. Alice's head peaked out. She grinned mischievously when she saw us wrapped around each other.

"Oops! Sorry to interrupt," she giggled. "Jeez, are you two giving the neighbors a show or something?"

I rolled my eyes as Bella wriggled out of my arms with a sheepish smile on her face; her cheeks flamed bright red. Placing her carefully back on the ground, I turned irritated eyes to my sister.

"Why the hell are you still here?"

She laughed at me. "Oh now you're the only one allowed to visit Bella? Damn, you let a guy shove his tongue into your mouth and this is what happens," she said, smiling at Bella.

Bella laughed but I wasn't so amused.

"Alice, we have plans for the day and you're holding us up. Go home."

"Ouch. You are so rude. You'd think sucking face for ten minutes would put you in a better mood."

I glowered at her.

"I'm going, I'm going," she cried with feigned indignation. She came around the door with her coat and hat in hand.

"Bye Maddie. See you later!" she called out before walking out of the apartment. "Don't forget to practice your fouette turns! Remember plie, second position, releve, and passe!"

"Plie, second position, weleve, passé. Got it Ally!" Maddie yelled back. She could barely pronounce the words, but she sure as hell could do the steps.

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

We made a necessary stop by my place before heading for the Zoo. I needed a serious shower and change of clothes. As we walked towards the building, Eli, the afternoon doorman, opened the door for us with an easy smile. Once inside, he greeted us while walking us to the elevator.

"Mr. Cullen, how are you doing today?"

"I'm actually doing really well Eli, thanks. And you?"

"Can't complain Mr. Cullen. " Eli pressed the call button for the elevator before turning his eyes to the two girls with me.

"Y quienes son estas lindas aqui?"

Eli and I got along pretty well, and often held these sort of conversations together. Bella was looking at me with a puzzled expression.

"Bella, Maddie, this is Eleazar. Eleazar, estas dos bellas son Isabella y Madisen Swan."

Out of the corner of one eye, I saw Bella's mouth hang open for a second before recovering herself.

Eli tipped his navy doorman's hat. "Ms. Swan, lovely to meet you."

Bella smiled softly. "Thank you. It's nice to meet you too."

Eli turned his eyes to Maddie, jerking back and putting his hands on his waist. "Aye bendito, pero mira que bella es esta nena. Parece nada mas que una angel," he grinned.

Maddie giggled, looking up at him with wide, quizzical eyes. "What did he say?" she asked in amazement.

"He said you're a beautiful little girl and you look like an angel."

"Thank you," Bella replied with a friendly chuckle. "Maddie, say thank you to Mr. Eleazar."

"Thank you," Maddie said sweetly.

"Just Eli ma'am."

"Eli then," Bella smiled.

Eli glanced from Bella to me quickly. "Novia nueva?"

I shook my head once. "Mucho mas que eso."

Eli raised both eyebrows, his mouth twisting in surprise. "'Sta bien," he responded with a nod of approval, holding the elevator door open for us to step in. Once we were all inside, Eli pulled out his doorman key and inserted it into the keyhole marked Penthouse 2, twisting it and unlocking it. Removing his key, he turned back to us.

Tipping his hat again, he said "Mr. Cullen, Ms. Swan, little Ms. Swan, may you have a wonderful day. If you need anything, just call down."

"Thank you Eli. We will," I assured him.

"Thank you Eli. You have a good day too. It was nice to meet you," Bella said kindly.

Eli smiled widely at her, his eyes twinkling. I could guess his thoughts. Tanya had never so much as looked at him unless it was to ask him to call her a cab.

"Likewise Ms. Swan," he answered with a nod. Turning to me, he shot out in his quickest Spanish, "Si me disculpa, pero esta me cae mucho mejor que la ultima."

I chuckled. "No te disculpes. A mi tambien."

Maddie pulled on my hand as soon as the elevator doors closed. "What was he talking?" she asked.

"That was Spanish."

She furrowed her brows thoughtfully "I want to speak Spanish too, like you."

"I'll teach you."

"I didn't know you spoke Spanish," Bella said, a funny expression on her face.

I shrugged. "I picked it up in high school, and then college. Business-wise it's a good language to learn, and besides, there's a large Latin population here in New York. What?" I asked at her expression.

"Nothing."

I unlocked the door to my place and held it open for the girls. Maddie ran in.

"Maddie darling, mind your manners!" Bella called out, chasing after her. "You can't just barge into someone's home like that!" Still, her own eyes darted surreptitiously around the apartment, growing wide as she took in the size of the place, and probably a few of the knick knacks, like the large, top-grain leather black sectional, or the black marble fireplace, or perhaps the black baby grand.

"Ooh Edwood, youh house is so pretty!" Maddie squealed, her little black patent shoes pitter pattering against the wood floors as she ran from one end of the living room to the other with arms out-stretched.

I smiled. "I promise to give you the grand tour, but first I seriously need to take a shower." Bella stood over by the glass door leading onto the terrace, staring longingly.

"May I?" she asked, with her hand on the handle.

"Please. Make yourself comfortable," I said, opening the door for her. "I'll be right out."

I ran into the shower and by the time I came back out, Bella was still on the terrace, gazing at Central Park across the street. Maddie was sitting by the piano, playing random keys softly.

The terrace faced Central Park West, Manhattan's back yard. The view from my 11th floor penthouse duplex was high enough to clear all the trees and give us a wide scope of the park's lake and greenery, as well as the mix of classic pre-war architecture - brick and limestone and gargoyles guarding the homes that encircled the Park - and of course, more modern sky-scrapers such as Trump's glass encased tower. The Park itself was amazing today. The rain from the day before and the fact that it was late October had both contributed towards a picture-perfect view, something out of a painting. Red, orange and yellow leaves hung precariously from the innumerable trees, and the rain had littered the Park's grassy floor with more of them. It was a classic definition of Fall.

I walked up behind Bella, sliding my arms around her waist. She leaned into me automatically. By then, I was pretty sure I'd never grow tired of how easily she responded to me. Every time I held her, it was like fitting a missing puzzle piece within my arms.

"This is such a beautiful view," she murmured in an awed voice.

"Mmm," I agreed, burying my face into the side of her neck; another habit that was quickly becoming a favorite past-time. "It's even more beautiful now, with you here."

She chuckled, turning in my arms. "Wow. You can be pretty cheesy sometimes you know."

I feigned indignation, tightening my grip on her waist. "I was going for romantic." I lowered my mouth closer to hers. "How 'bout I show you how you improve this view?"

She smiled slyly and her eyes quickly darted behind me, checking on Maddie. "Okay."

I brought my lips to hers, kissing her softly while her arms went around my neck.

"There," I whispered, pulling away to look at her. She opened her eyes, a dazed expression on her beautiful face. "Still think I'm cheesy?"

"Nuh uh," she murmured. "Definitely not cheesy." I smirked.

She opened her eyes and stared at me for a few seconds.

"What?"

"Edward I'm not trying to…what I mean is…" – she exhaled – "When you were talking about novias with Eli-"

"You know what that means?" I asked.

She shrugged, lowering her eyes. "I understand a few words here and there, that's about it." Her eyes rose back up to me. "But you shook your head when Eli said 'novia' so I assume that means-"

"He asked if you were my new girlfriend, and I said you were much more than that." Her eyes widened and she blushed, looking down again. I lifted her head up to me. "Is that okay? I mean, if you don't feel-"

She placed one finger over my lips. "Much more than okay," she murmured.

Bella chuckled, clearing her throat. "This is strange. I haven't been anyone's girlfriend in a really long time. It's funny."

"What's so funny about it?" I frowned.

"Well for one thing, I don't think boyfriend when I look at you," she snorted. I pursed my lips. "I mean," she clarified quickly, "you're not a boy, you're a man. But manfriend sounds pretty weird right?"

I chuckled.

Her eyes roamed around behind me, inside the duplex, and then took in our surroundings out on the terrace. "You're…" - she hesitated – "part of a different world over here."

I tilted my head to the side. "What do you mean?"

She bit her lip before answering, a habit I'd come to know meant the wheels were turning dangerously. "It's just…when you're in Brooklyn with us, I forget that you're so…" – She blew out some air, looking away from me – "You're very smart Edward, you run a successful agency, you're athletic, you cook," – she waved a hand towards the piano Maddie sat at – "apparently you're musically inclined too, you're bilingual-"

I cleared my throat gently. "Uh, actually I speak a little French and Italian too." More than just a little.

"Oh for the love of God, fine. And to round it all off, you're…" – she sighed – "well there's no way around it, so unbelievably good-looking and rich." She shook her head, smiling. "I guess I'm just not sure what I'm doing here, what _I_ have to add to this picture."

I placed a finger under her chin and waited until her eyes met mine again. Then I bent my head down and placed one soft kiss on her lips. "There."

She smiled quizzically. "There what?"

"That's what you add."

She stared doubtfully.

I exhaled. "Fine. I have a couple of confessions to make."

She arched an eyebrow. "More confessions? I thought we'd taken care of those last night?"

I shook my head. "There was more, but I got sort of distracted."

She fixed her brown eyes on me intently, and although digging a screwdriver through my brain would've been less uncomfortable than bringing this up again, it was something I had to get off my chest.

"When you walked into Rosalie's office the other day and overheard me telling her that I wanted you off the Cartwright Account and Lauren back on-"

She cut me off. "Edward, you don't have to explain your business decisions to me."

"It wasn't a business decision."

Her eyes grew wide. She dropped her arms from around my neck, her expression tightening. "Go on," she instructed in a cool tone that said 'You're about to get kicked in the balls.'

I swallowed hard. "It wasn't a business decision. I asked Rose to take you off the account because…because I hated the thought of you working so closely with those two assholes." Bella's head jerked back. She frowned, confused. "I hated the thought of them looking at you the way they look at other women. It drove me crazy to imagine their eyes on you in anything other than a professional manner."

"Edward, they're just a couple of silly old guys," Bella snorted.

"I know, I know," I agreed. "But I wasn't thinking clearly that morning. You'd been away for a few days and I was dying to get you back so we could finally get this on track." I pulled her in closer to me to punctuate my meaning. "And that fucking article had just come out in the paper, and I just…" – I ran my hand through my hair before looking back in her eyes – "My point is, I was jealous as all hell. That's why I wanted Lauren on the account instead of you. It was unbelievably selfish of me, I know, and I'm so sorry. But I've never been jealous before in my life Bella. Never. It's a new emotion for me and I didn't know how to handle it. And I'm telling you this so you'll understand that you add something to my life that I've never found in anyone else, and it's something I don't want to share. And I've got to warn you, since I tend to be a selfish asshole sometimes, that that jealous bastard might rear his ugly head again, although I promise to try to control it. But you wanted to know what you add, and that's my answer. You add you. Plain and simple."

She stared at me for a long moment, looking as if she wanted to say something. Finally, one half of her mouth twitched up.

"I can't believe you were jealous of the Cartwrights. I mean seriously Edward."

I got the feeling that wasn't what she'd meant to say. I shook my head and rolled my eyes anyway, and pulled her close to me again. "Alright, alright, so I'm a jerk, I already owned up to that too."

She pecked my lips gently. "You're not a jerk." She laughed. "But the Cartwrights?" she squeaked.

"Not just the Cartwrights, since you seem to think this is all so humorous. Just so you'll know, I'm about a heartbeat away from beating the shit out of James Smyth too."

She burst out laughing. "What? James? Why?"

"He's had his eye on you since you joined the agency."

"What?" she snickered. "No he hasn't. He's just being nice."

I rolled my eyes, smirking. "Nice? Yeah right. Nice. That's why he took you to lunch the other day, and tried to weasel his way into taking you to dinner the other night. Fucking asshole."

"Those were business meetings. We were planning and strategizing for the EverSoft Account," she laughed.

"Yeah, that's what _you_ were planning and strategizing for, but trust me, he was planning and strategizing something completely different," I growled. I still owed Rose big for her cock-blocking efforts there, as she'd reminded me the day after the 'dinner meeting.' If I recalled correctly her exact words had been, 'You owe me fucker.'

Bella laughed again, but then forced herself to stop when she saw the expression on my face. She kissed me chastely once more. I felt myself relaxing.

"Alice thinks James is good-looking," I said, trying without much success not to sound whiny.

Bella planted another sweet kiss on my lips. "Does she? Jasper better watch out," she joked teasingly.

I hesitated. "What do _you_ think?" I asked, cringing internally at how stupid I sounded.

"I don't."

"You don't what?"

"I don't think of James. One way or the other." Her arms encircled my neck again. "I'm too busy thinking of you."

A self-satisfied grin formed on my lips. Bella chortled. "Better?" she asked.

"Yes. Much better."

She laughed at me and shook her head. "So what was the other thing?"

"The other thing?" I asked.

"Yes. You said there were a couple of confessions."

I nodded slowly. "Oh yeah." I cleared my throat.

"Well, the other thing was," – I let out a whistle of air before rushing out – "I gave Maddie a brownie for her mid-morning snack yesterday, which made her crazy hyper, and then I lost her for about three minutes that felt more like three hours and had to chase her around the office until Alice finally caught up with her." I closed my eyes tight, waiting for her wrath. When I peaked out of one eye, she was watching me with a bemused grin.

"I knew that already," she chortled.

I frowned. "You did? How?"

"For one thing, the chocolate stains around her mouth were a dead give-away, and as for chasing her around the office, I saw the both of you out of the conference room." She laughed. "You should've seen the look on your face, it was priceless," she giggled.

"So you're not mad?"

She snorted. "You're the one who had to deal with the effects of the brownie, not me, and anyway, Maddie wasn't as far off as you seem to think she was. You were right behind her. Why are you bringing that up now anyway?"

I lifted one shoulder. "Because I've never had a day like that. You asked what you add to my life. Well, you're one, Maddie's the other."

She gazed at me thoughtfully. "You really mean that, don't you?"

I furrowed my eyebrows, confused by her question. "Of course I do."

Just then, the piano playing of the little girl in question suddenly got louder, and we went back inside to join her.

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

We sat overlooking the lake in Central Park, waiting for the check at the Boathouse Restaurant. The late afternoon sun glistened over the water, making me squint against the glare. The clatter of dinnerware, glasses and happy voices resonated in the air; the crowd growing larger as the day went on.

We'd spent the last couple of hours in the Zoo, taking Maddie from one exhibit to the other, from the monkeys to the polar bears, from the tigers to the sea lions, leaving her favorites for last; the penguins. Maddie squealed and giggled through the whole thing, watching in rapt amazement when the zoo employees threw fish and the penguins caught them in their mouths. Afterwards we walked hand in hand to a nearby playground, where she ran and played; the dirt on the knees of her jeans evidence of the fun she'd had.

Now we were finishing a late lunch at the Restaurant, burgers for the three of us, but the spectacular view was drawing in more and more diners.

I'd worn a hat and sunglasses to the zoo and the park, to maintain our privacy as much as possible. And while I didn't think anyone had noticed me in those places – who'd expect Edward Cullen hanging out at the Zoo and the park on a Saturday afternoon - I'd had to remove the sunglasses and hat in the restaurant. I wondered how long our luck would hold out.

The waitress finally arrived with the bill and the answer to my question. "Here you go Mr. Cullen," she said in a crappy Marilyn Monroe imitation. "I hope you enjoyed your meal. If there's anything else I can get for you, anything at all, just let me know," she added, facing her back toward Bella and smiling at me seductively. Bella glared at her, but the girl's eyes were glued to me.

"I don't need anything else, but how 'bout you check if my girlfriend does," I said in a cool voice, keeping my eyes on Bella. Out of my periphery, I could see the smile falling from her lips. She turned her attention to Bella.

"Is there anything else you need miss?" she asked in a clipped tone.

"No thank you," Bella responded crisply. Satisfied she'd fulfilled her obligation, the waitress turned her attention back to me. I handed her a bill before she could say anything else.

"Thank you and keep the change." I stood up to help Bella out of her chair, bringing her hand up to my lips. With Maddie cradled in my other arm, we walked out of the restaurant.

"I guess I'm going to have to get used to that, huh?" she said, as we strolled out of the park, Maddie skipping just a couple of feet ahead of us.

"No, you're not. That was fucking rude. I should go back in there and speak to the manager," I said, turning back around. But Bella pulled me back by my hand.

She shrugged. "No, don't do that. I'm a big girl, I can deal with it. And since no one knows about us I can't really expect-"

"Well, they'll find out soon enough," I assured her, bringing our hands up to my lips again. We were in Central Park on a Saturday afternoon after all. It couldn't be long before someone showed up with a camera. For once, the thought made me smile.

But Bella came to an abrupt halt. "They will?"

"Won't they?"

"Well, I guess eventually, but-"

"What do you mean by eventually?"

She stared at me for a moment before turning to look at Maddie. "Maddie, hold on honey. Don't wander off too far." She turned her attention back to me. "Edward, I don't think we should make this public just yet."

I raised my eyebrows. "Why not?"

"A few reasons, like just the fact that going public is even something we have to consider. I told you I haven't been in a relationship since Maddie's father. I'm not sure how to do this, and the thought of having to figure it all out in public…" She shuddered.

I moved in closer to her. "Hey, I'm no expert at this either. I mean, okay I've been…out there a bit more, but this is different. You know that right?"

She nodded slowly.

"We can figure it out together," I said reassuringly.

She didn't seem too convinced. "But why do we have to figure it out in front of an audience? You're right, they probably will find out soon enough, but why rush it? Why can't we keep this just ours for as long as possible?" She took my hand in between both of hers, squeezing tightly.

I swallowed anxiously. It wasn't so much that I was dying to reveal our relationship to the world, but for some reason I felt as if there was more to her concerns than she was letting on.

"What are your other reasons?" I asked instead of answering.

"Okay," she said slowly, "Well, as much as I hate to think about it, the fact is that I _am_ your employee."

"Bella CCW is a privately-owned agency. While we do still need to maintain strict professionalism and abide by certain work place regulations, we don't have stock holders to answer to, and we've never actually imposed a non-fraternization policy between employees. It just wouldn't have made sense because of Em and-"

"I'm not just talking about that Edward." She paused before saying, "I understand what you said before, about how you weren't thinking straight when you asked Rose to take me off the Cartwright account. And the whole jealousy thing with James, I get that too. Believe me, I get _that_," she added emphatically. "But Edward, you've got to see how all that would look if our relationship became public. I don't want people at work to think that I'm getting treated any differently because of my relationship with you. And I don't want them to think you're being anything less than professional. I just don't want our private relationship to affect our working relationship in any way."

My mouth stretched out in a thin line. I was pretty sure this was what Jasper had been trying to say in the car. And as much as I wanted to argue, I couldn't.

Bella bit her lip anxiously. "More importantly though," - she paused again to draw in a deep breath - "before we go public with this, I need to speak to my dad…and Jake. I don't want them to find out about us while on line at the Quik-Mart."

I exhaled. There it was; that's what I'd been waiting for. "So this is about Jake then?"

"No. It's about doing things right. It's about he and my father hearing it from me-"

"Well then just give them a call tonight and-"

"I don't want to tell them over the phone Edward."

I darted my eyes over to Maddie. She was climbing up and down a small hill of granite rocks protruding from the rocky ground, singing to herself happily. I looked back at Bella.

"When _do_ you plan on telling them?"

"When I go home for Thanksgiving."

"You're going home for Thanksgiving?"

"Yes." She frowned. "I thought I told you." I didn't answer because yes, she had, but that had been before. I wasn't sure why I'd thought that might change now. "If you're worried about my missing work, I won't be leaving until Wednesday evening before Thanksgiving, and we've got Friday off and then I'll be back Sunday-"

I shook my head. "Bella, I'm not worried about work."

"Then what is it?"

_What is it?_ What could I say? I don't want you to go back home. I want you to spend Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's and every single day between now and Kingdom Come with me? I want to yell out at the top of my lungs that I'm all yours and you're _all mine_. I want James and Jake _- especially Jake_ - and every other male within ten thousand miles to know about us? And most of all, I feel like there's more to your hesitancy than just a need for privacy.

Instead I just shook my head. "So you want to keep this" – I waved a hand between the both of us – "secret until you go home for Thanksgiving?"

She gazed at me sheepishly. "I wouldn't say secret. Just, you know, keep it quiet from the public and at work-"

"And from your father and Jake and Maddie."

She smiled apologetically. "Well we're not really keeping it from Maddie are we? If she asks us, then we'll explain it to her."

So it would be a secret from everyone except a four-year old. I tried to hide my disappointment, but the truth was it stung. But when Bella's arms came around my neck and she weaved her hands through my hair, she effectively relieved me of my ability to think straight. Whether she knew this power she had or not, I wasn't sure. It didn't matter though, because at that point I would've agreed to anything. And then when she met my eyes with those soft, chocolate ones of hers, I was a goner.

"I just want to be able to enjoy this without having to worry about any one else's opinion, for a little while at least. Does that make sense?" she asked, gazing at me with those brown eyes while her hands played with my hair.

Slowly, I wound my arms around her waist. "And then after Thanksgiving we'll tell everyone, including Jake, right?" I confirmed with an arched eyebrow.

She nodded emphatically. "Right."

I tried to smile. The truth was I wasn't sure what to think. I'd never been with someone who wanted to keep their relationship with me on the down low. Usually they were posing in their Sunday best in front of the cameras every chance they got.

"I guess I just…I was looking forward to showing you and Maddie off a bit more," I admitted. She blushed and looked down. "I wanted to take you girls out on the town, maybe even go on a few dates just you and me…?

She looked back up at me. "We _can_ do all that…soon."

"Well Alice and Jasper know," I reminded her. "That probably means my parents and Rose and Emmett will know soon, if they don't know already."

"I don't mind them knowing," she smiled, her chocolate eyes sparkling in the late Fall sun, and I knew I'd agree to anything as long as I was allowed to gaze into those brown eyes. I was whipped. Yeah, I knew it, and the sad thing was I wasn't even getting any. I snickered at myself.

"Well, if you really want to keep this quiet for now, we'd better get going. The Park's a magnet for the paparazzi."

She looked around nervously and nodded her head. Her expression suddenly shifted, as if she had some sort of confession to make. "Edward I'm..." – she stopped, seeming to change her mind about whatever she was going to say. "I mean, will you come home with us?"

"Of course I will. You didn't think I was going to let you go home by yourselves, did you?"

She smiled timidly, biting her lip. I raised a finger and pulled it out from between her teeth.

"What?"

"Will you stay with us again tonight?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes. I enjoyed my breakfast this morning," she teased.

"Well then, how do you feel about French Toast?"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

This time, I picked up a change of clothes. This time, I read Maddie a bedtime story. This time, Bella and I pretended to watch a movie for two hours, even though had there been a test afterwards on what the hell we'd been watching we would've both failed miserably. And this time, when Bella fell asleep, I carried her back to her room and lay her gently on her bed. When I turned to leave, she murmured something quietly, so low I had to lean down by her head to hear her.

"Stay with me Edward. Please. Stay."

"I'm right here Bella," I whispered, kneeling by her. "I'll just be in the other room."

Her eyes were still closed. She was dreaming.

"I'm scared Edward. Don't leave us. Don't go."

I frowned. "I'm not going anywhere Bella. I promise" - I swallowed hard – "Never."

"Stay," she murmured once more.

Before I could second guess myself, I pulled back the blankets and quietly slipped in beside her. The most incredible sense of warmth flooded my body, and when I pulled her against me, she molded herself to me. Blue balls be damned, holding a sleeping Bella beside me - in the warmth of her bed and the dark of night, everything silent except for the inescapable sounds of the city outside - was better than anything I could've ever imagined. No one had ever fit against me so perfectly.

I knew it then. It didn't even come as a thought; more as a sense deep inside. A feeling that had planted itself within me a while ago - I couldn't even say exactly when - but something in this moment had brought it to full bloom. Jasper had been right, although when he'd circled around it I hadn't understood. But now, at this moment, I saw it as clearly as I saw Bella's chestnut hair in front of my face. I felt it as real as I felt her warmth under my arms. And it didn't make me nervous or frightened. It soothed me. It brought me to life. I felt calmer and more alive than I ever had.

The words just poured out of me then, in the quiet of the night, to the sleeping woman beside me.

"I love you Bella," I whispered against her. No answer. She was sleeping soundly, safely.

"Don't be scared. I'm here. Always." I felt her relax in my arms, sighing deeply. I buried my head in her hair, inhaling deeply and mouthed the words again, tasting them, amazed at how real they felt, at the sense of relief that coursed through me the more I said them. There was a lot Bella wasn't ready for yet; she'd been hurt too much, betrayed too deeply. And I was pretty sure it would be too soon for her to hear those words while conscious. But if I couldn't let her conscious self know yet that I was madly in love with her, then I'd at least let her subconscious know.

"I love you." I smiled, holding her tighter to me. The words would lie here quietly until she was ready.

"I love you, both you _and_ Maddie. And I'm not going anywhere. I swear it."

* * *

**Translations:**

_Y quienes son estas lindas aqui? – And who are these beauties?_

_Eleazar, estas dos bellas son Isabella y Madisen Swan – Eleazar, these two beauties are Isabella and Madisen Swan_

_Novia nueva? – New girlfriend?_

_Mucho mas que eso – Much more than that_

'_Sta bien – That's good_

_Si me disculpa, pero esta me cae mucho mejor que la ultima – If you'll excuse me saying so, but I like this one much more than the last one_

_No te disculpes, a mi tambien – Don't apologize, I do too._

**A/N: Would you want to keep the relationship on the down low? You think she's being honest about her reasons?**

**Reviews make the updates come quicker. I'm freezing my butt off here on the East Coast, and nothing warms me more than a review. I'm not even kidding. Hit the green button and warm me up.**


	19. Chapter 18 Falling Head Over Feet

**A/N: Couple of things. I know some of you weren't too happy with Bella last chapter, because she seems to be reluctant to make her relationship with Edward public. Some of you thought it might be because she feels more for Jake than she's letting on. THAT IS NOT THE CASE. Put yourselves in Bella's shoes for a second. The only real relationship she's ever had ended badly, the guy very similar – on the outside at least – to the one she's with now. It's only natural she'd have doubts, even if they're subconscious for now. Plus she's got her daughter to think of too. The paparazzi isn't very kind people; they have no sense of boundaries. Remember that.**

**Other thing; this chapter has NOT been betad! Sorry Danna honey, but I know you're super busy and I wanted to get this out today so I can try to get another one out next week! Don't hate me love! I still need you! So everyone, you are forewarned. I apologize in advance for any mistakes, grammatical or otherwise, you find in the following.**

**Finally, if you go to my profile page there's a link to Paul, Bella's ex-husband. He is one hot mofo, no lie. Bella is one lucky chick with these guys, I'll tell you.**

**Still sticking to mostly fluff. Drama will be coming though.**

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* * *

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**Chapter 18 – Falling Head Over Feet**

**Chapter Song Recs: **

**Eternal Flame**** by The Bangles (I think I used this one already, but it's perfect for the end of this chapter. Trust me. Go YouTube it if you don't know it. Or at least look up the lyrics.)**

**Head over Feet**** by Alanis Morissette**

**BPOV**

"Jesus Christ did he move in or something? I hope you're charging him rent."

I laughed out loud at Alice's teasing, stealing a quick glance over the phone at Edward, who was helping Maddie out of her coat and trying to act like he wasn't paying attention to my conversation with his sister.

"He should just have his mail forwarded over there already," she snickered. "Tell him I said that." God, she loved to get on his nerves. I supposed it was her job as his little sister.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I chuckled once. Unlike me, Edward couldn't find the humor in Alice's teasing.

"Edward, give the girl some room to breathe for God's sakes!" she exclaimed laughing, loud enough for Edward to hear his name from where he stood a few feet away. He walked over to me quickly and snaked his arms around my waist, placing a soft wet kiss on my neck. I shuddered, feeling my legs weaken. Edward held me up and chuckled. Jesus, how was I supposed to hold a coherent phone conversation like this?

"What's going on there?" Alice asked suspiciously. "Eeww!" she cried when I didn't answer. "Are you guys kissing while you're on the phone with me?" Still no answer. "Eeww you are!"

Edward took the phone from me. "Hello Alice. Goodbye Alice," he said, before hanging up. I chuckled.

"She's going to make you pay for that one."

He rolled his eyes. "Forget Alice." He tilted his head, listening to the sounds of Maddie, busy digging through the toy box in her bedroom. His lips turned up in a sly grin. "Now where were we?" he murmured while moving his mouth back to my neck. The second his lips reached the sensitive spot between my ear and my neck, my hands tightened around his biceps, and I completely forgot Edward even had a sister in the first place. Until the phone, still in Edward's hand, rang again. Edward groaned, looking down at it with a grimace.

"Jesus Christ, that sister of mine can't get the hint, can…" his mouth turned down in a scowl for a split second, his eyes growing dark, before composing his features. With a blank face he handed the phone back to me.

"It's not Alice," he said coolly.

I bit my lip when I saw the Caller ID, but made myself look back up at Edward and smile. "I'll call him back later."

The phone continued to ring insistently. Edward's hand tightened around it, making the muscles in his arm and the veins in his hand pop out. He arched an eyebrow. "You sure?"

"Yes," I said quickly, prying the phone out of his hands and throwing it over on the couch, where it finally ended its ringing. The answering machine clicked on silently.

My eyes met Edward's. His face was impassive, his jaw set in a tight line. His whole body had stiffened. I raised my arms around his shoulders.

"I believe we were in the middle of something?" I asked. When he didn't answer, I pressed my mouth to his, winding my fingers through his soft hair. It took a couple of seconds, but he finally relaxed into me, his lips moving slowly against mine.

"Bella…" he murmured against my mouth, hesitant, as if he wanted to say more. "Bella I…" he sighed into me before tightening his grip on my hips. "Bella…" There was no more talk after that until little feet were heard scurrying back into the living room.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The past three weeks or so had been almost heaven. Edward, Maddie and I had become inseparable since that first weekend he'd stayed over.

That second night, I'd had the most surreal dream. I was floating on a bed of soft clouds, supported within them by an angel who held on to me tightly, keeping me safe, murmuring tender words of endearment in my ear. The feeling was so intense I woke up gasping, but at the same time happier and more at peace than I'd been in a long time. I'd closed my eyes, smiling to myself, and shifted on top of my mattress. That's when I'd realized I actually did have a pair of strong arms encircling me. My eyes flew wide open.

"Should I leave?" Edward had whispered, his arms loosening around me hesitantly. Whether he'd been awake the whole time or whether my movements had woken him, I didn't know. My answer was instinctual, unhesitant.

"No. No, don't go." I'd closed my eyes and lowered my head, nestling into him as if this were the most natural thing in the world, as if I'd always woken up in his arms in the middle of the night. His arms once again tightened around me, filling me with the most wonderful heat, and without another word, I'd started drifting off again.

I knew how crazy it was, I wasn't that clueless. Waking up in the middle of the night and finding a man in my bed? Insane. But at the same time, _so unbelievably_ _right._ Because it was Edward. I guess I should've been shocked, maybe even upset. But I simply wasn't. I welcomed his arms around me, the feel of his sculpted chest pressed up against my back. More than welcomed, I craved it. And before I'd completely wandered into subconscious again, I thought I'd heard him murmur something, a few short words, over and over, but the words were lost in my dreams.

I'd woken up again sometime later and felt the loss of Edward's warmth. Panicking, I'd crept out of bed quietly, all sorts of ideas and doubts running through my head. He'd decided that just holding me hadn't been enough. He'd decided he needed more, and he needed it _now. _And although I knew that if that was the case I had to let him go, a sharp ache filled me as I'd tiptoed over the cold floor in my bare feet, my heart thumping loudly in my chest.

But there he'd been, laying still as a statue on the pull-out, his bare arms flexed and folded up behind his head and his muscular legs up and bent at the knees, staring up at the ceiling. I'd breathed a silent sigh of relief and then just stood there, staring, admiring him, marveling at his ability to take my breath away. Yes, that was exactly the right way to describe him: breathtaking. Both inside _and_ out.

This had to be right, didn't it? Most of me felt it, deep in my heart that Edward _belonged_ here, with me and Maddie. He fit us so perfectly. In just the couple of days we'd spent together, it was as if he'd always been with us. How could this not be right?

But did _we_ fit him? The little voice who'd cried out her disapproval the night before was still there, and that little voice couldn't fathom the idea of someone like Edward wanting to stick around for the long haul – not just because he'd been a player for so long, but because my life was so different from his. He was Upper West Side royalty, I was a Brooklyn commoner, and a small town girl before that. How long would it take him to realize that? I sighed. Once our relationship became public knowledge, the media would have a field day highlighting all the differences between Edward and me. If he hadn't realized how different we were yet, he would then. I wrapped my arms around myself, drawing in a deep breath and wondering where that would leave Maddie and me.

Edward felt me watching him and suddenly sat straight up, finding me immediately. His emerald eyes sparkled in the moonlight streaming in from the window. He slid to the edge of the mattress and silently stretched an arm out to me, and when I reached him he'd parted his legs for me to fit between and taken my hands in his.

"Why did you leave?" I'd whispered.

"It's almost six Bella," he'd chuckled quietly. "Maddie will be up soon. I wasn't sure if you'd want her to find me in your room…" he trailed off.

"Oh," I'd smiled sheepishly, grateful one of us had thought that far ahead. "You're right."

Maddie hadn't questioned either one of us on our new, more touchy-feely status, but explaining why Edward was waking up in my bed would've been awkward.

After that night, we fell so easily into a routine that it was as if we'd been together for months, not merely a couple of weeks. Most afternoons Edward came home with me from work and spent the evenings with Maddie and me. Then on weekends, he'd stay over.

What amazed me the most was how easily Maddie accepted what was now Edward's almost constant presence in her life. There was no awkwardness, no resentment, no jealousy. If anything, she seemed happier than ever, as if she'd always been expecting him; waiting for him in her life. The nights he'd stay over I'd wake up the next morning and find her already starting her day with him; either snuggled on the pull-out watching TV, or in the kitchen helping him with breakfast. I kept telling them both to wake me when Maddie woke up, but neither would. After the first couple of weekends, I stopped saying anything. Early mornings had simply become _their time_.

And it _really did feel good_ to sleep a little longer.

After breakfast we'd plan our days. Because of how recognizable Edward was, we couldn't do too much yet. In fact, we hadn't been back to Central Park since that first weekend, which Maddie wasn't too happy about whenever we went to Edward's. She couldn't understand why we couldn't go to the Zoo again. It made me feel a little guilty, but I reminded myself our secrecy wasn't forever. Eventually, everyone would find out, and then…

We spent Saturdays in Brooklyn, because the paparazzi were less likely to spot Edward here, and we could walk around more freely, almost like a normal couple. We'd take Maddie to the park, walk around the neighborhood, eat ice cream while strolling down the river front, Maddie skipping happily in front of us while we admired the views of Manhattan's silver skyline from this side of the Hudson. And talk and laugh and joke and tease endlessly, getting to know each other more and more each day. Some days Alice and Jasper would hang out with us. Some days we didn't feel like letting anyone inside the little bubble we'd created for ourselves.

Sundays we'd spend at Edward's place.

"Buenos dias Señow Eli," Maddie said one Sunday morning as we entered the quietly elegant lobby of his building. She sat perched comfortably in Edward's arms. Her hair hung loosely from under the brim of the pink baseball cap she wore, identical to Edward's cap except for the color. While she spoke, Edward gently pushed her hair under the cap, keeping it out of her face. He smiled proudly at her use of the greeting he'd taught her.

"Buenos dias Señorita Swan." Eleazar looked over at me with an impressed smile which I returned immediately. "Ms. Swan," he greeted me, tipping his hat before turning to Edward. "Mr. Cullen." He turned back to Maddie.

"Come esta usted este buen dia?"

Edward coached some more words in her ear; her brow furrowed in concentration as she listened intently. "Muy bien, gwacias." More whispering from Edward while Maddie giggled in his arms. "Y usted?" she asked. Edward's face broke out in a smug grin.

"Mucho mejor ahora que las dos bellezas Swan han llegado," Eli responded. Or something like that. He lost me after the first couple of words.

"Hey, hey, hey," Edward growled jokingly. "Ten cuidado. Estas son mis bellezas." Once again, I was completely lost. Eli looked at me and nodded, a small smile on his face.

Later on, standing together on Edward's terrace and looking across at the park that reminded me of my woods back in Forks, I looked up at him and asked,

"What were you and Eli talking about this time?"

He wrapped his arms around my waist. "I'm not going to keep translating for you. You're going to have to learn Spanish along with Maddie."

"I'm too old to learn," I'd complained.

He chuckled. "No you're not."

I pursed my lips and rolled my eyes, unconvinced.

Edward sighed deeply, his green eyes blazing mischievously. He lowered his lips to my ear. "Well how about I give you an incentive to learn?" And then in a voice so soft and smooth it was as if he were caressing my whole body with it, he said, "Tu eres el tesoro mas bello en el mundo, y te adorare siempre." Or something like that.

"What does that mean?" I managed to ask, my hands wound tightly in his hair to keep from crumbling to the terrace floor.

He chuckled once, bringing his eyes to meet mine. "You'll have to figure that out on your own."

"But I can't even remember what you said."

Something deep and intense filled his eyes then. "Don't worry." He kissed me once, softly, on the lips. "you'll get it eventually."

Sometimes Rose and Emmett joined us at his place. It was crazy how easily we all got along; Emmett was a crack up and a giant teddy bear in the body of a young Arnold Schwarzenegger - all rolled into one. And Rose, well Rose hadn't shared her news about the bun cooking in her oven yet, but she and I had an unspoken understanding – I knew but didn't say I knew, and she knew I knew, but didn't say she knew I knew, and I knew she knew I knew, but, well, yeah. I'd figured out they were waiting for Thanksgiving to announce it to the family. Edward was clueless about it, and I felt a little guilty knowing this thing about his older brother and sister-in-law without telling him, but it wasn't my news to tell. Besides, once I came back from Forks it would be all out in the open. Rose and Edward butted heads - a lot - which was a source of constant amusement to Emmett and me. I got the distinct feeling Rose would be delivering a boy sometime next Spring, the spitting image of his uncle. I'd smile every time I thought of how adorable that little boy would be.

But as much as we enjoyed being with Emmett and Rose, Edward had no problem letting them know when it was time for them to go back to their place.

Maddie still napped in the afternoons and that was _our_ time…

Most nights when Edward was over at our place, it was he whom Maddie sought out for her bedtime story, and it was his lap she'd climb on, pressing herself into his chest and sighing contentedly when she was ready for a nap. Yet as much as it made my heart full to watch them together, it also scared me, because what would become of my little girl if Edward tired of this, of us? She'd given him her heart, that much was plain to see, and although she seemed to have his, I couldn't completely suppress the little voice here either, the one who couldn't let herself trust completely; the one who said it was one thing to risk my heart, but my daughter's…

I didn't know how to quiet that voice.

Because honestly, this had to be completely different from anything Edward was used to. We weren't girls that partied until all hours of the night, or early morning for that matter. Well, unless Maddie waking Edward at the crack of dawn counted. And while I loved waking up in the middle of the night in Edward's arms, I knew it had to be difficult for him; he who was used to so much more from women. But the little voice was there, and she wouldn't _let me_ take that next step. Not yet.

It was hard to think of sometimes, because it made me wonder when and if he'd start yearning for those things again - the glamour, the parties, the excitement, the girls who loved the limelight and belonged in it, with him. Girls who were up for anything, _ready for anything_ at the drop of a hat – or in Edward's case, at a simple flash of those hypnotic green eyes.

If he did start to miss that life again, I wouldn't try to keep him; I'd let him go. Just the thought of that day coming made my heart contract in agony. It took my breath away painfully, like all the air was being sucked out of my lungs.

_My God, what have I done?_ I'd ask myself during these moments of doubt. A purely rhetorical question, because I knew very well what the answer was. I'd known it since the night I woke up in his arms. Okay, fine; maybe even before that if I were being completely honest with myself.

The truth was that I'd fallen unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Edward Cullen.

I'd let him have my heart, and in doing so, I'd let him have my daughter's too. If he broke one, he broke the other. For now, Edward seemed content to settle into our quiet lifestyle. But how long would it last?

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

On Halloween, Edward, went trick or treating with us. His costume, combined with the dark sunglasses that had become his trademark whenever we were out, helped him stay anonymous through most of the day. But anonymous didn't mean invisible, and he was still Edward, beautiful and striking regardless of what he wore or how he tried to disguise himself. There were the more-common-than-not stares as he walked by; moms walking by with their little costumed characters unable to resist a quick turn at Edward's rear end as he passed them, completely oblivious to the drools he left in his wake as he kept his eyes on Maddie. I sighed.

"What?" he asked, half his mouth curling up as he stuck one of Maddie's treats in his mouth.

I smiled, shaking my head. How could he be so unaware of himself? Paul had always known the effect he had on women, and he'd never hesitated in using it, even while he was with me. And while maybe unaware wasn't quite the right word – Edward _had_ to have an inkling of how good-looking he was – he was very unassuming about it. And his eyes _never_ strayed beyond Maddie and me, no matter how beautiful the women openly ogling him as they passed by were.

Again the little voice asked, how long would it last?

"Nothing," I finally answered. He stared at me for a few seconds, as if he weren't entirely convinced by my answer, but Maddie was moving on to the next house already, and we had to follow. And even though we were supposed to be keeping things quiet for now, Edward reached down and took my hand, his long fingers curling around mine reassuringly. And even though the whole secret thing was my idea, I let him.

At first Maddie had insisted that Edward had to dress up as the prince to her princess, but once Alice came over with the costume catalog and Edward saw the tights that went along with the costume, my little four-year old daughter took pity on an almost tearful Edward, and with Alice's help picked out another costume for him. Too bad, because Alice and I had both been looking forward to seeing Edward in tights. She to fulfill her duties as the teasing sister, and me – well, any excuse to see Edward's muscular legs…

Alice's Halloween party was rescheduled for that evening at her studio, and the three of us attended in costume. Alice and some of her older students led everyone in a round of Time Warp, which I only agreed to do because Edward let us stay off in the back of the room, away from most eyes. Halfway through I gave up, sneering at Edward while he laughed uncontrollably. He took me in his arms and held me tight, while I pretended to fight him off.

"I told you I couldn't dance," I whined petulantly, pretending to push him away.

"Bella love, that's not dancing. That's the Time Warp for God's sakes," he chortled.

I glared at him. "I'm sorry if we can't all be perfect at everything we try."

He chuckled. "I'd hardly call an ability, or inability," he teased – I smacked his arm – "to perform line dances the true measure of perfection." He kissed me once on the forehead, then on the tip of my nose, and then finally on my lips. "You're perfect in my eyes."

I looked down sheepishly, smiling. "Obviously I'm far from perfect."

"Not to me. And you're pretty distracting in that dress," he added. "I'm sure no one here even noticed your missteps with you in that." I looked down at my pretty simple costume, a strappy, shiny green dress with black flowers on it, and comfy black converse on my feet. I hadn't even needed the brown wig or brown contacts. As far as costumes went, I was pretty comfy tonight. I thanked my lucky stars the other half to Edward's costume had been so simple, and that for once, Alice hadn't gone overboard.

Looking back up at Edward, I took advantage of one of the few opportunities I'd probably ever have to laugh at him. It wasn't so much his costume – it only consisted of dark jeans, a navy shirt and a short, trench style gray coat.

"_You're_ make-up job is pretty distracting," I giggled, raising a hand to caress his white powdered cheek. "Are you sure you were supposed to use that much glitter?" I teased.

He lowered his dark sunglasses and rolled amber contacts at me. "Haven't you seen the movie? The guy friggin' sparkles for the love of God."

I gave him a dubious smile, looking into his gold eyes. "If you say so, glitter boy."

He smirked, replacing his sunglasses. "Just be grateful Alice didn't make you wear any of the glitter."

Later on that night, after Maddie was tucked safely into bed, Edward and I were enjoying some grown-up time alone on the couch. We'd rented a scary movie for the night, and were half-heartedly attempting to watch it. In between kisses, a chiming noise from the TV caught my attention. I looked up from where Edward had me pinned under him and laughed.

"Hey you're right, he does sparkle!"

"Told you," he said, reaching out to grab the TV remote from the coffee table and turning it off. With his mouth on mine, he said,

"Now enough with the sparkly vampires. We were in the middle of something much more entertaining…"

His lips trailed down to my neck, moving slowly across my collar before pushing away the green strap from my dress and placing wet kisses on my bare shoulder. I whimpered pathetically and pulled on the hair at the nape of his neck. He groaned and bit my shoulder. All sparkly vampires were immediately forgotten. And for once, Edward was wrong; I did, in fact, end up with plenty of glitter on me.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

At work, I'd made it a point to avoid looking Edward in the eyes whenever we encountered each other, which was more often now that Rosalie had handed me the EverSoft Account. We had more interaction at work, more reasons and excuses to be around each other. I remembered how when I'd first started working at CCW, avoiding his eyes had been the only way I'd been able to make myself resist him. Well resisting him was out the window now, but if we were going to keep this thing under wraps until I could speak to my dad and Jake in person, I'd have to go back to avoiding his eyes again. I was sure that as soon as my eyes met his, bells would start ringing and bright red lights would flash from every corner in the building, big white spotlights would glare down on both of us, announcing to everyone within the building that Edward and I had more than just a professional relationship going on.

It was one morning a couple of weeks into our relationship that I first realized just how difficult this was going to prove to be. We'd gotten the green light from the Cartwright's to run the print ads for the Baby's Bottom Campaign, but just before Edward had booked studio time to shoot the new commercial, the Cartwright's decided they wanted to come in and review the mock frames one final time. So I brought them in one morning and when we reached the conference room, all were there except Edward.

"Edward had a conference call this morning. It might be running over," Emmett explained to the Cartwrights. "Bella, why don't you go tell him we're ready?" Emmett asked with a crooked grin in my direction.

"Sure," I said, getting up before anyone could see the heat on my face. When I reached Edward's office, Angela waived me in. I knocked on his door.

"Come in," he called out distractedly.

"Edward, the Cartwrights have arrived and are waiting in the conference room," I announced, opening the door and fighting a nervous smile.

It was the first time we'd been semi-alone in the office all week. I looked at his face as I spoke, but didn't meet his eyes, focusing on his lips instead. A distraction in and of themselves and a reminder that I'd really rather be kissing them.

And by the way one side of his mouth turned up in a wicked lop-sided grin I was pretty sure he knew what I was thinking.

"I'll be right there," he spoke in a low voice. That's when I noticed he was holding the phone by his ear, covering the mouthpiece with one hand. "I'm on a conference call with NBC. We're almost done."

"Oh. Sorry," I mouthed quietly, taking a couple of steps back. I wondered why Angela had waved me in if Edward was on a call. "I'll meet you in the conference-"

"Bella wait," he whispered loudly, his hand still on the mouth piece. I stayed still. His hand moved away from the mouth piece. "Alright Jim, I'll let the Cartwrights know we've blocked a twenty-second spot for them. Thanks. Alright. We'll talk again soon. Good-bye." He hung up and looked back up at me, the wicked grin still on his unbelievably handsome face.

"Bella, can you please close the door behind you for a second?" he asked in an extremely professional voice, completely out of sorts with the mischievous grin on his face.

I pursed my lips and narrowed my eyes, but against my better judgment went ahead and closed the door. When I turned back around he was standing right in front of me.

"Jesus Edward, you almost gave me a heart attack," I jumped, staring straight ahead at his chest.

He continued grinning. "I just wanted to say good morning." He took one step forward. I took one step back, effectively pinning myself against the door. A low chuckle erupted in Edward's throat. "Good morning," he repeated in his velvety-smooth voice.

The palms of my hands moved nervously against the door. "Good morning Edward," I said, staring past him and fighting a smile; I didn't need to encourage his behavior.

"Hey Bella, I'm over here," he chuckled softly, moving into my line of vision. Judging by how wide his own smile had grown, it was too late to discourage him.

"I know you're there," I snapped unconvincingly, glancing at him and then looking away again and biting my lip to keep from smiling; another mistake because he had a habit of releasing my lip from between my teeth with his finger when I did that. Actually, sometimes he used his mouth. Either option was unacceptable at the moment.

His finger started to come up to my lips.

"Uh uh," I whispered quickly, turning my face to the side, away from him. "No fooling around in the office, remember?" I reminded him in a whisper.

He chuckled again. "I remember. I was just going to save that bottom lip there from the abuse you're putting it through. I've become rather fond of it and would hate to see it get hurt."

I glanced up at him quickly, looking away again and honestly trying my best to look irritated. But it was hopeless while he had that crooked grin of his plastered on his face.

"You're making this really hard right now you know."

He snorted, moving in closer. "Trust me, you're the one making things hard."

_Holy mother in heaven_. I took a quick look down at myself to make sure the wave of scorching heat traveling between my scalp and my toes hadn't completely disintegrated me. I fought down the urge to look over and confirm his words for myself. _Not in the office Bella. Not in the office._

Something in my face must've alerted Edward to what I was thinking. I saw him smirk out of the corner of my eyes.

"That's not what I meant Bella. I just meant I'm not doing anything I shouldn't be. I haven't even touched you," he grinned slyly.

"I thought we had an agreement," I managed to murmur.

"And I'm sticking to it. We're not fooling around in the office, I haven't touched you, and we haven't done anything to make any one here suspicious of our relationship. Hell, you won't even look at me when we're at work," he chortled, forcing himself into my line of vision once again. My eyes took him in for just a split second, his strong, square jaw, his chiseled features – I forced myself to look away before reaching those hypnotic green eyes.

"You know why I can't look at you at work."

"Because you'll lose all self-control?" he teased.

"Something like that," I replied honestly.

He moved his face closer to mine, his breath tickling the side of my face.

"How am I supposed to behave myself when you say things like that?" he breathed.

"I didn't say anything, you did."

"You agreed."

I swallowed loudly.

He chuckled and shook his head, his mouth so close to the side of my face that I could practically feel his skin on mine. "How far away is Thanksgiving again?"

"About three weeks."

"Three weeks," he breathed on me, his lips grazing my cheek. A small shudder ran through me.

"Edward…" I pleaded half-heartedly. It sounded pitifully weak even to my own ears.

"Bella…" he imitated me in the same tone. His lips trailed to my ear. "So in three weeks you'll be able to meet my eyes again at work?" He raised his arms against the door behind me, effectively caging me between them. "In three weeks I can stop pretending I'm not dying to kiss you senseless every time I see you?"

_Sweet Jesus_. I gasped. "It's not like you don't do it plenty when we're home."

Out of the corner of my eye I saw him arch an eyebrow. "Does it make you senseless when I kiss you?"

I closed my eyes. "You know it does."

"Mmm," he murmured quietly. Even with my eyes closed, the intensity of his eyes on me burned deliciously. I could feel his eyes trailing up and down over every part of my body, and damn-it, _it felt too good_. How could I resist him when he behaved this way? And just as I opened my eyes, ready to give up, he pulled back, dropping his hands from where they'd held me trapped against the door.

"You're right Bella. Maybe we should get to that meeting now."

I moved away from the door, giving my head a couple of quick shakes to clear it.

"You okay?" Edward asked with a smirk.

"Mmhmm," I squeaked weakly. "You'll pay for that."

He chuckled and opened the door. "Promises, promises."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

We were parked in front of Sue's picking up Maddie after work and I asked Edward to come in with me to get her.

He arched an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Sue knows about us," I said with a smug smile.

"She does?" he asked, surprised. I nodded. "Doesn't that go against all your plans to keep this on the DL until Turkey Day?"

I shook my head. "Edward, I just don't want to deal with having people we don't know putting their two cents into this. But I know Sue well, and I just thought it would be important for her to know that you're…you know, around Maddie a lot now, because she's with Maddie a lot."

Edward nodded thoughtfully. "And what does she say about us?"

In the few months that I'd known her, Sue had become sort of a surrogate mom and grandmother to Maddie and me. She wasn't very surprised when I'd told her about Edward – Maddie spoke about him constantly and Sue had more or less surmised that there was more than a working relationship between us.

"He's an extremely good-looking man," Sue had admitted after I'd told her over a cup of coffee on one of the rare days when Edward hadn't come home with me. "He's sure in the papers a lot."

I knew where she was heading. "He's not like that; he's not the guy the tabloids have made him out to be." _Not anymore at least. I think. I hope_.

Sue had raised her eyebrows. "Is that based on what you've seen or what he's told you?"

"Both," I answered honestly.

She'd nodded thoughtfully. "Look Bella, I know I've only known you and Maddie for a few months, but you girls are very special to me."

I'd placed a hand over Sue's on the table. "You're special to us too. I hope you know that. And I really value your opinion, especially regarding Maddie."

"Well Maddie's certainly been happy lately, there's no doubt about that." She paused and smiled tenderly at me. "I've never met Mr. Cullen, and I don't want to judge him based on what I've read or seen on the gossip shows. You know I hate all that anyway. I'd just like to say one thing to you."

"Go ahead," I said, holding my breath.

Renee had been such a small part of my life for so long now. Our relationship had never fully recovered after the whole Paul thing. After a while I'd realized whether Paul and I had gotten married or not, my relationship with my mother was bound to cool off. We were too different, too far apart. She'd only met Maddie once, when I'd taken her for a long weekend to Jacksonville. After that, it was just basically phone calls on holidays and birthdays; Christmas cards stuffed with a twenty dollar bill once a year.

So Sue's opinion right now mattered very much to me. She was the kind, tender woman I'd never had in my life. And while Esme had also become an important older woman to look up to, at the end of the day, she was Edward's mother. I couldn't speak to her about my fears regarding her son.

After a short pause, Sue continued. "A man can hide almost anything when he wants to Bella; he can say just about anything, fool just about anyone." I looked down at my lap. "But there's one thing a man can't do." I looked back up and she met my eyes. "He can't trick a child into loving him." She squeezed my hand. "You take your cues from your daughter; she'll let you know what's in his heart."

Back in the car with Edward, I answered him honestly. "She says you're very important to Maddie."

Edward turned and stared out the front windshield. "Important to _Maddie_," he murmured, nodding his head. After a few moments, he turned unreadable eyes back to me. "Let's go pick up the princess then."

I turned to look up at Edward while we waited for Sue to answer the door. He looked down and smiled at me, running one hand through his hair nervously.

Again, Sue was less surprised than I would've expected to actually meet Edward this time. She shook his hand pleasantly, her eyes growing wide when he smiled crookedly – apparently even she wasn't immune to him.

Maddie squealed in happiness when she saw Edward in Sue's house, taking him by the hand and introducing him to her little friend Juliana and giving him the grand tour of the play room. Sue watched them carefully.

"Mr. Cullen-" Sue began.

"Please, call me Edward," he called back, kneeling with Maddie while she showed him her latest Lego creation.

"Edward then," Sue agreed. "Would you like a cup of coffee or hot chocolate?"

"Hot chocolate sounds great, thank you."

"Are you a hot chocolate lover like Bella and Maddie?" Sue asked, glancing at me and smiling.

"Well, I can't blame them for my chocolate addiction, but yes, I do blame them for my new fondness for hot chocolate," he teased, walking back towards us.

"Hey, don't blame me for your sweet-tooth," I teased him back.

He pulled on one end of my hair, smiling mischievously. "I completely blame you for that and more." He stared at me for a few seconds. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Sue watching us curiously. After a moment, Edward blinked, as if snapping out of something.

"They are a couple of sweet girls, aren't they?" Sue chimed in.

Edward turned his attention to Sue, taking the mug of hot chocolate from her and thanking her. "Yes, that they are."

We sat and talked for a few minutes. Edward appeared to relax and fell into easy conversation with Sue, about the Yankees, about being native New Yorkers. His eyes would trail to me or Maddie every once in a while, and by the end of our drinks I could tell Sue was completely taken with him.

I picked up our empty mugs and went to rinse them off, hearing Edward call out to Maddie from the table behind me.

"Princess, go get your sneakers, it's time to go. Come on, I'll help you tie them on."

"Okay Edwood," Maddie agreed easily.

Edwood said his polite goodbyes to Sue and thanked her for the hot chocolate once again, and then with Maddie in his arms, went to put her in her car seat. As soon as he was out of ear shot, Sue turned to me with a smile.

"Bella, there was one more thing I forgot to tell you a man can't do."

I tilted my head questioningly.

"He can play it cool all he wants, but his eyes will _always_ reveal his true feelings. Especially when he's feeling that much."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Real life has a way of sneaking up on you, giving you a hard pinch to wake you when life has become too dream-like. My first wake up call came about mid November.

I was rounding one of the corners around the maze of cubicles on our floor, heading over to Rosalie's office. It was a little past noon and the floor was relatively quiet, most everyone had headed to lunch already, and I was meeting Rose for just that. Because of our situation, Edward and I couldn't go to lunch together, which made me a bit sad, but I enjoyed my lunches with Rosalie. James had invited me to lunch a few more times since that time we'd bumped into Edward in the lobby, but I always made some sort of excuse. Edward's comment had opened up my eyes; James was flirty with me. I personally found it sort of funny, because I couldn't have been less interested. But Edward failed to see the humor in it - giving James a murderous glare the poor guy didn't even deserve whenever he even looked my way. It's not like he knew Edward and I were involved.

Rose and I had made plans to get pizza together and then make a quick stop by Borders. I'd just found out the night before that Edward had never read 'The Time Traveler's Wife,' and that was completely unacceptable. I was going to get him a copy and rectify the situation today. Smiling to myself as I anticipated our evening together, I turned another corner when a couple of familiar voices just around the bend froze me to my spot.

"That's not a bad idea Lauren, but as I've said before, you need to run it by Rosalie first."

"Oh I know Edward. I just figured since I bumped into you I might as well run it by you. I've been working on the graphics and I think the guys at Springtime Organix'll really like them.

"These are pretty good," Edward said. I could hear the rustling of papers and pages being turned. The conversation continued on in that vain, while I bit my lip, debating whether to turn the corner and make my presence known. On the one hand, I didn't want to just stand here and eavesdrop on their conversation. But on the other, I wasn't sure if the three of us standing together was a good idea either.

Just as I was about to retreat the way I came, the sound of feet shuffling, and then Edward's voice, cold and menacing, glued me to my spot.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Wow, you've really been working out huh? Your biceps are so…_hard_. I bet the rest of you-"

"Lauren, don't ever touch me again. Do you understand?" Edward hissed under his breath. I felt as if my heart were about to beat out of my chest. "You keep your hands to yourself in this office."

"Well we can easily take this outside of the office whenever you want…"

Edward exhaled loudly. "Look, I'm really sorry I let things get so out of hand a few months ago. You have no idea how sorry I am. That was wrong on so many levels. But you need to understand something and understand it _now_. You and I are both here to get a job done, and that is it. In the future, I think it best if we limit our interaction with each other as much as possible. You'll clear all of your work and designs with Rosalie, and she'll bring them to my attention if necessary. Understood?"

I held my breath waiting for Lauren's response, my pulse hammering so loudly I was sure it would give me away.

"Understood?" Edward repeated in a low growl.

When she still didn't answer, something propelled me forward, out of my hidden spot around the bend; shock, disbelief, anger, jealousy - take your pick. I turned the corner, my gaze landing immediately on Edward. His eyes widened in horror upon seeing me.

Silence surrounded the three of us for what seemed like forever. And just like that, I might as well have glued a sign to my forehead.

Lauren smiled wryly, her eyes moving between Edward and me as if she'd just put together an amusing puzzle.

"Oh I understand perfectly _now_, _Mr. _Cullen," she said in a mocking tone. Walking away, she turned and stopped right in front of me. With a snarl on her face, she leaned in and whispered in a voice for only me to hear, "Enjoy it while it lasts Bella." And with that, she sauntered away.

Edward and I were both quiet on the car ride back to Brooklyn.

Halfway through the ride, he exhaled loudly and tightened his grip on my hand.

"You okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," I shrugged, as if I hadn't a care in the world.

"Bella, I…I'm really sorry about today."

I turned to face him. "You don't have to be sorry Edward. You didn't do anything." And it was true. I wasn't upset at him; I'd heard what was going on, and while I hadn't seen, I was pretty sure my mind had drawn up a fairly clear picture of the events. Lauren on the other hand…the possessive, unreasonable part of me wanted to rip her head off and spit down her neck, screaming '_Hands off the biceps skank_!' But the cool, controlled part of me, the one who kept reminding me that I was a mother and had to act like one - and that besides, Edward wasn't a possession that belonged to me - kept telling me to shrug it off and just forget about it.

Possessive, unreasonable Bella was winning.

But it wasn't Edward I was upset at. Other than Lauren, I was irritated with myself mostly. Because part of me did just want to scream it out to the world: _Edward is mine, claws off bitches!_ But the little voice was there, telling me I'd just be making a fool of myself if I did. I had to admit it to myself then, it wasn't just my desire to do things right by my dad and Jake that had me holding off on going public.

"What did she say to you when she walked away?" Edward asked, his face contorting in anger.

I shrugged again dismissively. "Nothing important." And then I turned and stared out my window for the rest of the ride.

By that Sunday, Lauren was all but forgotten. We were spending a lazy afternoon at Edward's. Emmett and Rose had come up to hang out with us, and Jasper and Alice had dropped by too. Pretty soon, Emmett brought up his Karaoke machine, much to Rosalie's chagrin, but half an hour later she and everyone else was busy belting out out-of-tune renditions to the latest top 40 – well, out-of-tune renditions for everyone except Edward. Of course, he'd have the most perfect voice I'd ever heard. Even Maddie got in on the act, joining Edward for a rendition of Greenday's Time of Your Life, although she mumbled her way through most of it. Strangely enough, watching them both singing together almost brought tears to my eyes. When they were done, I noticed everyone else watching both of them with much of the same wonder I usually did.

After our rock star impersonations, we were all pretty much starving. Edward ordered up a few pizza pies, and once everyone had taken their share, I picked up a couple of slices and put them on a paper plate, covering them with a paper towel. I grabbed a couple of cans of soda from Edward's fridge, and turned to where he stood by the garbage, throwing away dirty paper plates.

"Edward, I'm just going to run these down to Eli while they're still warm."

He smirked and pulled me back to him by my arm. "You're spoiling that man. Every weekend I've gotta here from him now, 'So what're we having for lunch boss?'"

I shrugged. "He's a nice guy. And he probably gets hungry down there." It was mid-November. The days had grown much colder, the nights colder still. Poor Eli had to stand out there eight hours a day opening doors for people, accepting packages, hailing cabs in the cold and the rain, and pretty soon the snow. He seemed to be about my dad's age, and although he didn't physically resemble him, something about him made me think of Charlie.

"He reminds me of my dad," I admitted to Edward. "I feel kind of like I'm taking care of him."

Edward pulled me closer to him, placing a warm hand on the nape of my neck. "You're an amazing woman, you know that?"

I shook my head. "There's nothing amazing about me Edward."

He swallowed thickly. "Yes there is Bella, and I-", He gazed at me anxiously, as if he were afraid to finish his sentence. When he finally spoke again, his eyes were burning, but he simply said in a low voice, "Yes there is Bella." With his hand still on the nape of my neck, he pushed my head forward until our lips met, and he kissed me with a passion that took me by surprise. His tongue found its way into my mouth, sending waves of pleasure coursing through every vein in my body, until I was whimpering helplessly in his arms.

"Hey Edward, where do you keep-" came Emmett's voice from behind us, pulling us apart quickly. Emmett's eyes sparkled with mirth. "Shit do you two ever come up for air?" he teased, leaning against the wall and watching us amusedly.

"Watch your language," Edward growled, jerking his head towards the living room, where Maddie was eating her pizza and playing Connect Four with Jasper, sprawled out in front of the fire place.

"Oops! Sorry," Emmett snickered in a lower voice.

"It's alright," I chuckled. "Edward's a little paranoid when it comes to Maddie. I'm sure she can't hear us all the way over here."

Seriously, you had to pack a lunch to trek from one room to the other up in this place. But somehow, Edward managed to keep it feeling cozy.

"Oh I'd be paranoid about what Maddie can hear too," Emmett chortled, wriggling his eyebrows as Rose walked into the kitchen.

"Man shut the hell up," Edward growled, leaning up against the opposite wall and pulling me into him, my back resting on his chest. Eli's pizza was getting cold.

"Stop teasing them babe," Rosalie berated Emmett. "You know they haven't done it yet anyway," she chuckled, fitting herself under Emmett's huge arm.

I dropped the pizza and sodas, barely missing my feet and Edward's by inches.

I turned around to face Edward. His face was contorted in horror.

"I swear I haven't said anything."

Rosalie laughed. "Oh relax Bella. It's pretty obvious you two haven't done the horizontal mambo yet."

"No it's not!" I hissed, feeling my face flaming.

"It kinda is sweetie," Alice agreed, traipsing in gingerly and taking a seat on one of the tall stools against the dark granite counter. She gave me an apologetic smile. "I swear, the sexual tension between the both of you is so thick you can cut that shit with a knife." She made slicing sounds and moved her hand in the figure 'X.'

I stared at her, dumbfounded. Edward seemed to be just as speechless behind me.

"Why do you think Em and I come up here so much?" Rose added with a lopsided grin. "Hanging out with you two's become our favorite sort of foreplay. By the time we get back down to our place, we're ready to go!"

"Seriously," Alice agreed, fanning herself.

"Alright. All of you. Out." Edward growled, standing us both up and moving threateningly towards his family.

Emmett howled with laughter. "Chill dude! We're just fucking with you. Since no one else-"

"OUT!" Edward bellowed.

They all burst into fits of laughter, walking quickly out of the kitchen before Edward threw them out physically. We followed them.

"Jeez bro we were just fooling with you! Can't you take a joke? Look at Bella. She's not having a heart attack!" Alice giggled, tapping Jasper on the shoulder and jerking her hand towards the door.

"Hold up Al, Maddie's beaten me three times already. Lemme just-"

"Jazz, get up," she chuckled while putting her coat on. "We've been kicked out."

"Mad sweetie, Uncle Jazz'll catch you next time okay?" Jasper assured Maddie, patting her on the head while he stood up.

"Okay Uncoe Jazz," Maddie agreed, rubbing her eyes. She was getting sleepy.

Before the door slammed behind them, Alice, still giggling turned to face me.

"Bella honey, you know we were just joking right? We love hanging with you guys. You've made Edward so much more bearable!"

I wriggled my fingers up close to her face. "Bye bye Alice," I sang out, before Edward closed the door on them.

I leaned up against the door frame. Edward came to stand in front of me, shaking his head. "Fun bunch, aren't they?"

I chuckled. "Yes, they are."

Downstairs with Eli and a couple of fresh slices of pizza and soda, I sat down on the empty stool next to him while he dug into his first slice.

"Mmm mmm," he moaned through a mouthful of food. "Ms. Swan, this hit the spot. If you weren't Mr. Cullen's woman, I'd kiss you," he winked.

I blushed and looked down, smiling. "Hey Eli, can I ask you a question?"

"If it's about Mr. Cullen's love life before he met you, I plead the fifth," he said with a smile. "Besides, I personally don't think Mr. Cullen had a love life until he met you," he winked again.

I chuckled. He wouldn't be saying that if he'd been in Edward's penthouse during Rose and Alice's tirade a little while ago. "No, it's not about Mr. Cullen's love life. Not really."

"Well then, go ahead Ms. Swan. Ask away," he said with a bemused smile, taking a long chug from his soda can.

"How long have you known Edward?"

"Let's see," he said thoughtfully, chewing off another piece of pizza and gazing up at the ceiling. "He moved in here about six years ago. He was still a kid then."

I nodded, picturing an Edward just graduated from college. He was a couple of years older than me, so six years ago I was in my second year of college, just married to Paul.

"What's he like Eli?" I asked curiously.

Eli gave me a puzzled smile. "Mr. Cullen's pretty easy to read Ms. Swan, especially now."

I gave him a puzzled look.

He chuckled, sighing and putting down his slice of pizza. "He's a good guy. A little wild there for a while, but…well, we men go a bit wild when we're looking for something we can't find."

"What was he looking for?"

"I don't think you need my help to answer that one Ms. Swan," he smiled wryly, picking his pizza back up.

I swallowed. "What if…what if he wakes up one day and realizes what he thought he was looking for doesn't exist?"

Eli looked me square in the eyes. "Are those your fears for him, or for yourself?"

Sometimes, when you need someone to talk to, it's hard to find the right person. Your oldest friend – thousands of miles away – would never understand. Your closest friends right around the corner are too close to everything, and everyone else you know would ask too many questions you wouldn't be ready to answer just yet.

Sometimes you need an Eli.

"If anyone would have told me a few months ago that my daughter and I would be here with Edward, I…I just don't know how this happened."

Eli searched my eyes, finally smiling slowly, as if he'd found what he was looking for. He leaned in and patted my leg in a manner very reminiscent to something Charlie would do.

"Te amo sin saber cómo, ni cuándo, ni de dónde."

I scrunched my brows, giving him a questioning grin.

"I only understood one word from that."

He winked. "I bet it was the most important word."

I shrugged.

He took a drink from his soda can before bringing his eyes back to me. "Ms. Swan, sometimes the most important events in our life just happen." He lifted his shoulders as if to say 'what can you do?'

"Just trust _yourself_ Ms. Swan, and everything'll be alright."

When I got back upstairs, Maddie had fallen asleep, and Edward had placed her in the guest room. The past few Sundays, that room had become Maddie's napping room. I opened the door and peeked in on her. She was sleeping comfortably, the soft comforter up over her shoulders, her hair splayed out around her on the pillow.

Edward came up behind me, taking both my hands in his. "Your hands are cold from hanging out down there with Eli. Come on, let's light the fireplace."

Once he got the fire going, he grabbed a throw from the black sectional behind us and spread it out on the floor. Then grabbing my hand, he guided me to the center of it, sitting me down gently before placing himself behind me and pulling me to rest on him. We sat there in comfortable silence for a long while, just staring at the fire, the orange and red flickering flames sparking and crackling while Edward played with my hair and I relaxed myself deeper into him.

"This is nice," I finally murmured.

"This is very nice," he agreed in a soft whisper.

When I turned my face to the side, his mouth found mine immediately, his hand cupping my chin to keep me in place. The kiss started slowly, our lips meeting and parting gently, tasting each other, but then his tongue came out, slowly slipping itself into my mouth. Gradually, the tempo increased. A low groan from Edward sent a wonderful, prickling sensation rolling through me, and then I was turning myself around, repositioning myself so that I was straddling his lap and pushing him back, laying him down on the soft blanket and letting myself fall on top of him. My hands dug deep into his hair, which I knew he freaking loved. Laying over him like this, I could feel every part of his sculpted body, the heat emanating from him and warming me to the core, the strong, hard muscles of his stomach, the rapid beating of his heart pressed up against mine, and his growing desire right under me. Instinctively, I pressed myself into it, my body melting at the feel of him.

"Uhhh Bella," he groaned, closing his eyes. "You have no idea what you do to me."

I kissed him gently once. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I just needed to feel you."

He chuckled weakly. "Don't apologize for that love. You can feel me whenever you want." As if to illustrate his words, his hips rose up to meet mine, making us both groan again, panting into each other's mouths. His hands traveled under my sweater, caressing up and down my back.

Suddenly, I sat up, resting my full weight on top of him. His eyes grew wide in surprise. Before he could say anything, I picked up one of his hands - so strong and soft at the same time, so warm - and kissed each finger tenderly before placing it palm down under the front of my sweater, just on my stomach. With my hand over his, I intertwined our fingers. His eyes grew wider and I felt his whole body still under me.

"Relax," I murmured. He nodded, swallowing visibly, his Adam's Apple bobbing up and down. Slowly I moved our hands up, over my stomach, passing each rib before stopping at the indentation right in the middle of my chest. Edward's eyes never left mine. After a short pause, I moved our hands again, and when we reached one soft mound, Edward drew in a sharp breath, an unintelligible sound emanating from deep within his throat. Again, I stilled our movements, squeezing his hand, which in turn made him encircle his fingers around me. The feel of Edwards large hand touching me, covering me, was like waking up to a new world, like a thousand points of pleasure coursing through my body all at once. Indescribable.

I let us revel in that feeling for a few moments, but that hadn't been my destination. There was something else I needed him to feel; something he needed to know, even though I couldn't make myself tell him yet. Slowly once again, I moved our hands higher, until his hand was right over the quickly beating part of me that had become his in the few short weeks we'd been together.

Edward's eyes bored deep into mine, the meaning of my actions registering in his face. He smiled softly, his hand caressing me gently over the place where our hands had stilled. Then he took my other hand in his, and as slowly as I'd done, he repeated my actions. Placing my hand right under his t-shirt, he moved it over his flat stomach, tracing every indentation between his ribs and over his hard chest, before reaching the spot where his heart beat as quickly as mine. There, he stopped.

There were no words necessary. Not yet.

Before I let my mouth fall on his again, I looked into those deep green eyes, darker now, the flames of the burning fire reflected inside them.

"I have no idea how this happened, but there's no place I'd rather be right now."

Half of his mouth twitched up. "That's good, because we're staying right here for a while."

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Translations:

Buenos dias Señow (Señor) Eli – Good morning Mr. Eli  
Buenos dias Señorita Swan – Good morning Ms. Swan  
Come esta usted este buen dia – How are you this fine day?  
Muy bien gracias. Y usted? - Very well, and you.  
Mucho mejor ahora que las dos bellezas Swan han llegado – Much better now that the two Swan beauties have arrived.  
Ten cuidado. Estas son mis bellezas – Watch it. These are my beauties  
Tu eres el tesoro mas bello en el mundo, y te adorare siempre** – **You are the most beautiful treasure in the world, and I'll always adore you.  
'Te amo sin saber cómo, ni cuándo, ni de dónde' – Quote from Pablo Nerudo, Chilean poet. 'I love you without knowing how, nor when, nor from where'

**Wanna give me a holiday gift? Leave a review! **

**I will TRY to update once more before Christmas next week, but I can't make any promises. If not, here's wishing all of you Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Gung Hay Fat Choy, Happy New Year, and anything else I'm forgetting! Love you all!**


	20. Chapter 19 Anxiety

**A/N: Happy New Years everyone! Sorry, I know it's been a while, but here we are.**

**The next chapter is being betad and should be up this week.**

**Thanks to my beta Danna0724 for putting up with my long ass chapters.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I've just moved them to the East Coast for a while.**

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**Chapter 19 - Anxiety**

**Chapter Song Recs:**

**Animal – Neon Trees**

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_PAGE SIX_

_November 21, 2010_

_Eddie C. Hooked by Mystery Girl?_

_Oh Eddie, say it ain't so! Lucky patrons at Westbury, Long Island's local Starbucks got an unexpected treat sweeter than their over-priced lattes yesterday when hunky Millionaire Playboy Edward Cullen and his gorgeous bronze locks were spotted canoodling with a petite brunette over a cup of steaming brew. "They were hugging and kissing and giggling like a couple of love-birds! And he held her hand the whole time, like he was afraid to let her go," one of the young baristas informed us after a patron snapped this little pic on her iPhone and sent it to us. Eddie holding hands? We wouldn't believe it if we couldn't see it for ourselves! The pic itself is a bit grainy, and because of the way Eddie's cheek is pressed into hers as she whispers sweet nothings in his ear, you can't really see the lucky little brunette too well. But you can definitely see the enthralled expression on his face! "I didn't recognize her," the barista confirmed for us with an envious smirk. "She wasn't anyone I've seen him with before. But by the way he looked at her, I'd say he's hooked!" she added sadly. That might explain why he's been MIA these past few weeks. Looks like on-again off-again girlfriend Tanya Denali might have some serious competition here!_

**EPOV**

**One day Earlier:**

Bella's head was on my stomach, her eyes closed and a small smile playing on the edges of her full lips as the cool late November breeze whipped up a few strands of her long hair and covered her face. I leaned in closer, resting my full weight on one elbow so I could use my other hand to remove a strand of hair from her mouth. Her lips puckered as I grazed them with my hand and she placed a soft kiss on my fingers, sending an instant flash of warmth coursing through my body, heating me as we lay on a blanket on the cold grass in my parent's back yard on a perfect Saturday afternoon. Though it was cold, the sun was shining brightly overhead, providing enough heat for us to enjoy the day outside with the rest of my family.

I gazed down at Bella, smiling to myself as the sun's rays sent a lightshow of auburns, reds and gold through each silky strand of her hair. God damn she had some perfect skin. In the few weeks we'd been together I'd realized Bella rarely wore any makeup other than some occasional lip gloss that made her perfectly pouty lips even poutier. But her skin, it was flawless; as I ran my fingers across her face I couldn't see or feel one single bump or blemish. The couple of hours we'd spent out here had brought a beautiful pinkish glow to her creamy cheeks, making her look even more perfect than usual. The salesman in me pictured her face on a magazine ad for…for what? No matter what fucking lies we told in this industry, there was no magic cream or potion in a bottle that could recreate Bella. An image of Tanya popped into my head; her face caked in some powdery substance that was supposed to hide her imperfections – it used to piss the hell out of me whenever I'd take off my shirt and find that shit all over me. I grimaced and shook my head.

I traced my perfect girl's lips lightly with my finger and instinctively bent down to kiss them. But as my mouth neared hers, I heard a soft tune coming from her lips. I paused, turning one ear towards her mouth.

"_Oh yes I can make it now the pain is gone. All of the bad feelings have disappeared. Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for. It's gonna be a bright, bright, bright sun-shiney day."_

I sang the next part with her.

"_Look all around there's nothin' but blue skies. Look straight ahead, there's nothin' but blue skiiiiiiiiiies_!"

She giggled and opened her eyes, beautiful rich browns meeting my gaze. We continued together:

"_I can see clearly now the rain is gone. I can see all obstacles in my way. Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for. It's gonna be a bright, bright, bright sun-shiney day. It's gonna be a bright, bright, bright, sun-shiney day!" _

"Yo man, shut it and get your ass over here so we can beat you at your own game!" Emmett yelled, bouncing a soccer ball from one leg to the other. He elbowed Jasper next to him and both men started snickering and pointing at me, laughing louder while they whispered to each other back and forth like little girls.

A bullshit challenge if I ever heard one. Marley time was over.

I lifted myself up higher from where I'd been laying, supporting myself on my elbows. Bella's head rose up with my stomach. "Come on love, let's go play," I coaxed her with a wink.

Bella sat up, frowning. "Edward, in case you haven't been paying attention, coordination and dexterity are not my strong points."

I stood up, wiping my hands on my faded jeans and giving her my hand so she could stand. Pulling her into my arms, I finally lowered my lips to hers, pulling her bottom lip softly.

"I'll help you," I murmured persuasively. I was dying to get Bella to play with me. Well, I was dying to get her to play lots of things with me, of which Soccer was definitely not at the top of the list. But hey, you had to start somewhere.

Her frown deepened but her lips twitched at the sides. It was all the encouragement I needed. I gave her my crooked smile and she sighed in defeat.

Halfway through the game, I was half-wishing I would've listened to her and let her sit it out. Our team was leading four to two – and by our team I meant myself and my dad. Bella and Maddie, while beautiful and sweet, weren't helping with the scoring situation. Bella, in fact, as much as I loved her – and over the past few weeks I'd come to realize I loved her more than I could've ever imagined loving someone – had become a liability.

Whenever Maddie had the ball, the opposing team, made up of Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie and Alice, would all stand around and ooh and ahh and exclaim, 'oh look at her she's so cute!', letting her keep the ball to her little heart's content and then coaching her to kick the ball in the right direction.

But whenever Bella got the ball…

"Get her!" Alice would cry. It hadn't taken her long to figure out Bella's weak points at Soccer, which admittedly, where many. She'd run her miniature legs in Bella's direction at full speed and then for some unexplained reason I couldn't for the life of me figure out, Bella would panic and start screaming, kicking the ball haphazardly in any direction. It had gotten so bad that Carlisle and I had an unspoken agreement.

Keep. The ball. Away. From Bella.

We were still winning though.

"You're going down Eddie!" Emmett bellowed, pointing his huge finger in my direction and then doing a fist pump after having scored another goal, thanks to Bella's fumbling of the ball. Again. The game was now four to three.

"Keep talking out of your ass big brother!" I yelled back, my competitive streak taking over and kicked into high gear at the thought of - _cringe_ _and gulp_ – losing a game to Emmett and Jasper. I'd even managed to momentarily forget that a four-year old princess with innocent ears was on the field with us. Said princess giggled loudly, amused by my discomposure.

"Yo Edward, watch and learn man! This is how Big Green does it, in case you've forgotten!" Jasper snickered, referring to his days as midfielder at Dartmouth.

"You're the one who seems to need a reminder of who the hell was your team captain sophomore through senior years!"

"Bella baby, you might want to sit the rest of the game out, this shit is about to get ugly" I exclaimed, glaring at Emmett and Jasper and their snickering other halves. I turned to Bella, expecting her to be more than willing to take me up on my offer. After all, she hadn't really wanted to play in the first place. Instead, her brows furrowed and her lips twisted into a smirk.

"What?" I asked, puzzled by her expression.

"I don't want to sit the rest of the game out," she pouted.

I refused to let those soft luscious lips distract me. I had a game to win damn it. But fuck when she puckered like that my long deprived mind could _not_ think of soccer…

_Focus Cullen_. I hadn't been Big Green's MVP three years in a row only to be disqualified by a pair of soft, juicy lips. So cushy…so sweet...

_Damn it man, focus!_ I put my hands on her arms. "I thought you hated sports."

"I thought I did too." Her arms came around my waist, her hands resting lightly on my backside; besides my hair, another of her favorite spots. I, of course, had no complaints.

"But I'm having fun playing with _you_," she continued, smiling up at me.

"But Bella sweetheart, the game's getting pretty close."

Her eyes narrowed. "What does that mean?" she asked, an annoyed edge to her voice. "If I stay in, I'll make us lose?"

"No! No! I didn't say that!"

"But it's what you meant!" She stared at me thoughtfully before lowering her arms and turning away. "I'm staying in!" she said stubbornly. I groaned. She turned to give me a hard glare.

"I mean great! Let's get'em!" I said quickly.

Rosalie scored the next goal after Bella accidentally kicked it to her. She and Alice high-fived each other while my father and I held in the expletives on the tip of our tongues.

Bella smiled at me sheepishly, raising her shoulders. "Sorry."

"Alright Bella, the game's tied. The next goal decides it. Please love. Stay. Away. From. The ball."

She glowered at me and stormed away.

Halfway through the next play, I had the ball, but with everyone covering me, I kicked it to Carlisle. He ran with it towards the goal area, kicking it but missing by mere inches as Emmett head bunted it back towards the open field, where it landed right in front of Bella's feet.

"I've got it Bella!" I yelled out, running in her direction. "Don't touch it!"

Suddenly, she picked the ball up and with a strange gleam in her eyes, held it protectively in front of her.

"Bella hon, no hands! Remember?" I reminded her from a few feet away. Jasper, Rose and Alice were approaching quickly.

"Say it's just a game!" she demanded. I stopped short in front of her, staring at her wildly.

"What?"

"Say 'it's just a game' or I won't give you the ball back!" she repeated, her eyes dancing wickedly.

I shot a quick look around the field. Jasper would be on us in four seconds.

I turned back to Bella. "Drop the ball or _I will_ tackle you."

She burst out into fits of laughter.

I tackled her to the ground.

Over the past few weeks, I'd learned many things about Bella. She liked to walk around barefoot, even early in the morning when the floor was freezing. She liked to sit with her feet curled under her, whether watching TV, or reading a book, or even while eating dinner at the table. She was a doodler; put a pen in her hand and she'd doodle for hours; pictures, shapes, names, anything and everything.

And she was ticklish as all hell.

She laughed uncontrollably, gasping for air as my fingers found her ribs under her heavy sweater, trailing up higher to her underarms, making her buck on the floor, tears falling from her eyes from the force of her chortles.

"Stop! Please! Stop! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" she cried through fits of laughter. But I kept tickling her, my hands grazing the sides of her breasts over and over as I trailed my fingers back and forth between her ribcage and her underarms. The way she looked at me – her laughter dying down and her eyes on mine intently – let me know she knew exactly what I was doing. She chuckled once more before raising her arms to pull me down on top of her.

"Come here," she commanded roughly. I obeyed.

"Misconduct!" I heard from above while my mouth landed soft kisses on those damn distracting lips over and over. "That was misconduct of the most blatant kind!" Jasper laughed, coming to stand over us.

"It's only misconduct when you attack a player on the other team," I mumbled, keeping my eyes on Bella while I continued my attentions to her lips. She giggled, kissing me back.

"I still demand a penalty kick!" Jasper said.

Suddenly, I felt a small thump on my back. I twisted myself around to find Maddie sprawled on top of me, her caramel face flushed from all the afternoon's running and excitement, the pony tail Bella had put her hair in hanging crookedly to the side. She giggled when my eyes met hers.

"My tuhn, my tuhn! Tick-oh _me_ now Edwood! Tick-oh _me_ now!"

The words almost popped out then – both to her and her mother - as they almost had dozens of times in the past month. But now wasn't the right time.

I let Jasper take his penalty kick – and win the game - while I tickled my girls senseless.

For the first time ever, I lost a game of family soccer.

oooooooo

Bella was in the kitchen helping Esme get dinner ready while the rest of us had gathered in front of the family room TV to watch the college football game.

"Yeah! Touchdown! Woohoo!" Emmett yelled, to which the rest of us responded with the same loud enthusiasm, standing up and high-fiving each other.

I sat back down, rearranging Maddie back on my lap, where she'd been resting for the past half-hour or so. She was tired, I could tell by the way she nestled into me and drew small circles with her finger on my shirt, but she refused to close her eyes. With a sudden pang of guilt, I realized all our hooting and hollering probably wasn't helping any.

"Hey princess, how 'bout I take you up to Ally's old room? You can nap there if you're sleepy."

"No," she pouted, keeping her heavy-lidded eyes on the circles she was tracing on me, "I'm not sleepy. I want stay heeuh with you."

"You sure?" I asked softly. "I think you'll be more comfy up there. Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rose are getting pretty rowdy down here."

Rosalie shot me a dirty look. "Look who's talking. Thanks to you poor Maddie almost jumped out of her skin when the QB fumbled that ball." She mimicked how I'd yelled at the TV a few moments ago. "'You dumb-ass son-of-a-'"

"Hey, I didn't finish that sentence," I clarified, glaring at her.

She pursed her lips. "It wasn't the words you idiot. It was how loud you yelled them."

My guilt grew exponentially. "Come on princess. I'll carry you up."

She grabbed on to my shirt tightly, digging herself deeper into my chest. "No, I stay with you." Her speech grew even more baby-like when she was exhausted. I sighed and gave up, wrapping one arm protectively around her to keep the noise away.

Five minutes later, despite continued hooting and howling, she was fast asleep.

I walked out of Alice's room after laying Maddie down for her nap, closing the door quietly behind me. When I turned around, my father was coming down the hall.

"What's the score?" I asked.

"Pennsylvania's up by one in the last quarter."

"Shit. I mean, damn. Alright, let's go finish watching."

"Actually," Carlisle hesitated, "Do you have a minute? I was wondering if you could help me get some stuff out of the attic. Your mom's asking for the Christmas lights and I have no idea where they're buried."

"Sure," I shrugged.

A few minutes later, we were moving box after box of old pictures, trophies, clothes, and all sorts of junk out of the way, looking for the Christmas lights.

"It's not even Thanksgiving yet," I groaned, picking up a heavy box marked 'Emmett's stuff – HANDLE WITH CARE!' and throwing it across the crowded room.

"Yes, I know," my dad responded in a strained voice, moving aside some other boxes. "But you know how your mom is. She wants the lights up the day after Thanksgiving, and that's only a few days away."

"Don't remind me," I grumbled.

"Oh that's right, Bella's not going to be here for Thanksgiving," Carlisle smiled sympathetically after finding the right box.

"Mmm," I mumbled.

I wasn't really in the mood to talk about it. Bella's trip back home for Thanksgiving was a sore point in an otherwise amazing few weeks of my life. Well, that and what were almost nightly phone calls from Jake.

Jake: AKA The Prick. At least that's what I called him in my head.

Having found the correct box, Carlisle pulled out each green string and inspected bulb after bulb carefully.

"Things are good then? With Bella and Maddie?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

I smirked. Help with the finding the Christmas lights my ass. "For the most part."

Carlisle frowned, his hand pausing on a little red light. He looked up at me. "Little Maddie's okay with everything, isn't she?"

I fought back a smile. How one four-year old could have a whole family wrapped around her tiny little finger was beyond me. But we were; there was no denying it. Especially me.

"Oh, yeah," I answered quickly, pulling the string of lights out of Carlisle's hands and tightening each small bulb meticulously. "Maddie," – I sighed, an automatic smile pulling up the sides of my mouth – "Maddie's just great. She's just about the most perfect little girl you could ever imagine."

Carlisle's usually well-composed expression softened again. Abruptly, the frown returned.

"No more problems with her…you know…her…uh…father?"

I felt my chest tighten, in response my fingers tightened around the small bulb in my hand, making it pop into little pieces of red glass, one little shard digging into the side of my index finger.

"He still won't sign those parental termination papers Bella's lawyer sent his lawyer."

Okay, so Bella going home for Thanksgiving and The Prick weren't the only things stopping my life from being perfect. But the thing with Paul - his refusal to sign the termination papers - was something Bella didn't like to discuss. I could see the terror in her eyes every time I mentioned it, so I stopped bringing it up. She'd let me know if Jenks finally had some good news. I refused to think of any other outcome. I would _never allow_ any other outcome.

"But Jenks keeps assuring Bella that eventually Paul will sign the papers. I don't know all the details, but apparently Jenks is pretty confident" – I smirked – "that whatever he had on Paul that made him drop the custody request will also convince him to sign the termination papers once and for all." I rubbed my chin with the palm of my hand. "Bella doesn't like to talk about it and I don't want to push her, but I can only assume it must be some serious shit – sorry – crap."

Carlisle was silent for a while. I looked over at him, and his usually cool, reserved eyes held some deep emotion, something I couldn't remember seeing in them for a while. It was the same look he used to get when we were younger and some asshole would decide to mess with one of his three kids. Carlisle was usually a calm, serene upstanding guy. He'd always tried to teach us to talk through our problems with anyone.

But fuck with his kids and he'd come out swinging.

"I don't know dad," I finally huffed, running my hand through my hair. "The only way I can keep myself from going insane is to believe that Jenks knows what the fu- I mean, what the hell he's talking about."

After a few moments, he put a hand on my shoulder.

"It'll all work out son. You'll see. And if Bella ever needs any help with anything, anything at all, please make sure she knows your mother and I are here for her. And for you too son."

I looked down, embarrassed by the moment we were having. In the past few weeks, my dad and I had slowly started to rebuild our relationship. But it still felt strange to have these heart to heart talks with him. The truth was though, I needed them. I'd never been happier than I'd been these past few weeks, even minus the sex. But there was still so much I didn't understand about Bella. I'd never imagined feeling so close, so absolutely _right_ with one person. And while most of the time I was sure Bella felt almost as much for me as I did for her, I couldn't shake the feeling that hit me sometimes, when she'd look away from me abruptly when she was in my arms, or when I'd catch her looking at me sometimes as if she couldn't figure something out – like she was holding something back. Like there was a part of her she still wasn't ready to share. That day by the fireplace, when she'd placed my hand over her heart, I'd almost said the words. I'd almost told her that I was more deeply in love with her than I'd ever imagined myself being with anyone, but I'd followed her lead and placed her hand over my heart instead, hoping it would at least give her some sense of what she meant to me. But even after that evening, there were still times when I'd feel some sort of hesitancy coming off of her. And then the time just never felt right to tell her. So instead, I tried my best to show her, by letting her set the pace of our relationship, by being patient, by not pushing her for things she wasn't ready for.

Like sex. Truth was, just because I wasn't pushing for it didn't mean it wasn't on my mind. A lot. Admittedly, over the past few weeks my hand and I had become more intimately acquainted than we'd been since I was fifteen. But I kept telling myself that it was just a matter of time. Over the past couple of weeks, Bella had slowly become…bolder, you might say. She'd rub against me suggestively while we were kissing, or she'd let her hands wander down to my backside, no longer making apologies when she gripped and squeezed and pulled me in. And fuck if I was complaining. Likewise, since that day when she'd put my hand over her heart and let me cop a real, genuine feel on the way, I'd become bolder myself, letting my hands explore more and more under her shirt whenever we were alone, smiling to myself and doing a mental fist pump like a chess club high schooler experiencing his first all-American boob. And even though I hadn't gotten any under-the-bra action yet, I could tell they were the softest breasts God had ever blessed a woman with. I could only hope Bella would practice what she preached Maddie about sharing and share that blessing with me. Soon.

I snorted. Who would've ever thought that at twenty-eight, the highlight of my sex life would be groping my girlfriend _over_ her bra? And that it would give me the biggest hard-ons I'd ever had?

We had a weekend routine by now, where I'd end up in Bella's bed with her at some point in the middle of the night on weekends, and make my way back onto the pull-out before Maddie opened her eyes at the crack of dawn. I'd slip under the covers, the sudden rush of heat warming me to the core as soon as I'd pull her back against my chest. Yet it was here, alone with her in her bed, that my hands never strayed. Because I already knew how Bella felt, and the more she gave, the more I'd want. And Bella hadn't given us the green light for that _yet_.

What sign Bella was waiting for I had no friggin' clue. But whatever it was, I prayed nightly that she'd get it soon - before either my balls exploded or my left hand succumbed to Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

"Edward, are you hearing me?"

I looked up abruptly to see that Carlisle had been talking to me – his piercing blue eyes narrowed in frustration as he realized I hadn't heard a word he'd said in God knows how long.

I blinked and shook my head quickly. "Sorry dad, I guess I was lost in thought. What did you say?"

He smirked. "I was just saying that…well, I know you and I have had our differences in the past few years, but I just want you to know that if you ever need to talk, I'm here. I mean, I know you tend to feel more comfortable discussing things like women and…sssssuch with your Uncle, but-"

Was Carlisle trying to have a sex talk with me? We'd already gone through this when I was ten, and then again before I left for college. Granted I hadn't gotten any in a few months now, but how much could it have changed since then?

Either way, there was no way in hell I was doing this one more time, no matter how much I wanted to patch things up between us.

"Dad, thanks. I know I've been a pain the ass for a while now, and I appreciate you trying to get me back on track. Things are good dad. I mean, of course there's always something…but…" – No, I couldn't discuss this with my father. I wouldn't even know where to start, or what to say. _My girlfriend's holding out on me dad, not just when it comes to sex but I think maybe some other way too? I just don't know how or why?_ No. It didn't even make sense in my head, much less aloud.

In the end, I took a deep breath and said, "Thanks for letting me know you're here if I ever need to talk."

Carlisle looked like he wanted to say something else, but instead he just smiled lightly and patted me on the shoulder.

"Come on, carry that box down for your mother and let's get out of this dusty attic. I've got surgery tomorrow, can't afford to let my hands get messy."

We brought the boxes down from the attic, and since Maddie was still fast asleep, my mom suggested Bella and I go into town for a little while, grab a cup of coffee or something. We were in Long Island the weekend before Thanksgiving. What were the chances that the paparazzi would be down here instead of covering all the holiday preparations in the city? So foregoing dark sunglasses or cap or anything, we took her up on her offer.

Later that evening, after it had grown dark and we'd finished dinner, Esme sat with Maddie at the piano, much as she'd done with me when I was about her age, and started teaching her the basics. Taking advantage that Maddie was entertained, I grabbed up a couple of throws lying on one of the sofas and pulled on Bella's arm.

"Come on, there's something I want to show you," I told her, quickly leading her out the back door while wrapping one of the throws around her.

"Edward, you're family's going to think I'm trying to turn them into my own personal sitters!" she complained as I led her across the yard, through the first set of spruce trees that wrapped around my parent's property, shielding the house in a protective cocoon away from intrusive eyes.

I rolled my eyes. "Are you kidding? Didn't you hear my mother planning sleepovers and princess tea parties with Maddie over dinner? Those two have the next few weekends all figured out for themselves."

The night was cool and pitch black; a new moon. I held her close to me, sharing our body warmth, and tightened the throw around her. When we were deep enough among the huge pines and spruces, I opened up the other throw and placed it over the cold earth, sitting on top of it and pulling Bella to a sideways sitting position on my lap. She laughed as she fell on me.

"Edward, what are we doing out here?" she asked quizzically. She quickly removed the throw from herself and wrapped it around the both of us, lowering her head into the crook of my neck and wrapping her arms around my shoulders. I wrapped my arms around her waist.

"I told you, I wanted to show you something," I said, turning my head so that I could nuzzle her nose against mine. The tip of her nose was cold. I pulled her in closer, feeling her warm breath spread around my face and neck, quickly melting the cold away.

"Oh you want to show me something?" she chuckled into my neck. "Those are famous last words. Next thing you know, the guy takes the girl into the dark, scary woods and they're never seen or heard from again."

I rolled my eyes, rubbing my nose against her cheek. My hands traveled under her sweater, making her jump.

"Your hands are freezing!"

"Sorry," I chuckled.

She picked her head up and looked at me, her brown eyes black in the moonless night, but shining brightly with a light all their own.

"So what is it you want to show me?" she grinned suspiciously. "Or was that just an excuse to get me out into these romantic surroundings? Because you know, there's nothing that a girl likes more than freezing her a-"

I put my mouth on hers to silence her. "Close your eyes," I murmured, keeping my eyes on hers.

"What?" she giggled. "Okay, now you're really starting to-"

"Do you trust me?"

The split second hesitation before she nodded once should've sounded a warning bell, but at the time I chose to ignore it.

"Then close your eyes. I'll close mine too. Count to a hundred and then open them up."

"I'll be an ice cube before I get to 20."

I wrapped my arms around her waist even tighter. The heat from her stomach had warmed my hands up considerably. They were scorching now. I ran them up and down her sides quickly.

"I'll keep you warm. I promise."

She swallowed before smiling softly, and then closed her eyes. I closed mine too. We counted to a hundred together.

I opened my eyes. "Open your eyes and look up," I whispered. Instead of looking up as I'd asked her to do, I kept my eyes on her.

"Oh," she gasped, her eyes widening in amazement and her arms tightening around my shoulders. "So beautiful!"

"Yes," I agreed, running my lips back and forth against the side of her face, though I was entranced by something completely different to what she was gazing at. "So so beautiful," I murmured before reluctantly turning away from her and looking up at the sky.

"They say a moonless night is the best time to see the stars. In the city, we don't really get to see them much. But here, far away from city lights, the houses so far apart…" – I shrugged and turned back to her, the look of amazement on her face bringing a grin to mine. I cleared my throat and looked back up.

"Those first few months after I dropped out of pre-med, when I used to come home from college, my dad and I would get into constant arguments. I don't know who started them anymore; I don't really think it matters at this point. But back then I'd storm out of the house and come here by myself and just lie here for hours and hours, looking up at the sky and thinking."

Bella turned her eyes back to me, cocking her head to one side.

"What did you think about?"

I kept my eyes on the tiny pinpoints of light, focusing on the way they twinkled and lit up the night sky.

"I used to…" – I sighed – "I used to pick one star, any star, and wonder if there was anyone under the great black sky that was looking at exactly that same star at exactly that moment. And I used to wonder what that person was thinking of just then. If they had a father getting on their case all the time like mine was," I chuckled. "If they felt as lost and confused as I did, or if their life was absolutely perfect, not a care in the world. I used to wonder where in the world that person was, and what it would be like to meet one day. What we'd talk about…" – I drew in a deep breath – "Eventually I stopped coming home, and moved to the city, and completely forgot about the stars that couldn't be seen from there anyway, as well as the person I'd once hoped was somewhere out there looking at them with me."

We were both silent for a while. I could feel Bella's eyes still on me intently. After a few minutes, I drew in a deep breath.

"Anyway, I thought you might like to see them. I know its cold out here-"

She brought her lips to mine, kissing me softly, her sweet breath fanning my face. Her lips caressed mine so gently, yet the heat they brought to my entire being was enough to warm me better than a heater set to the highest setting ever could have. I felt her nose against me and it didn't feel cold anymore. And when I reached up to my shoulders and took her hands in mine, they were warm now too. I lowered our entwined hands in between us, where we sat cocooned warmly inside our throw.

Eventually, she pulled away and bit her lip, watching me as if she wanted to say something.

"What?" I asked, lowering my mouth to hers to pull her lip gently away from between her teeth

"This is beautiful Edward. Thank you." Her words were spoken tenderly, sincerely. But as sometimes happened, I got the feeling that wasn't what she'd wanted to say.

I didn't push it further.

ooooooooo

"What do you want Alice?" I growled over the phone. "We just saw you yesterday. Christ, you ever heard of sleeping in on Sundays?

The sleeping in part was total bullshit. Well, at least for Maddie and me. We'd been up for over an hour. She was now finishing up her blueberry pancakes, a dish that had become her favorite in the past few weeks.

As I watched her, she reached across the table for the maple syrup and proceeded to turn it upside down over her plate, her eyes growing wide in fascination as the pancakes drowned in the sweet, sticky substance. In two strides I was next to her, gently prying the syrup out of her small hands.

"That's _way_ too much syrup there princess," I chuckled, taking the plate away and placing it on the counter. "We don't want you turning into Taz before eight in the morning." She gave me a quizzical frown that made me chuckle again. I removed a clean plate from the cabinets.

"It's seven-thirty in the morning," Alice screeched over the phone. "Before you came along, Bella'd been to the market, balanced her check book and done two loads of laundry by now."

"Well forgive me for letting her rest. Now fuck off and call her later," I murmured quietly enough for Maddie not to hear before turning back to the table and placing two fresh pancakes in front of her.

Bella was still knocked out in her room, bundled up warmly under her blankets - at least, that's how I'd left her a couple of hours ago. Her body had been so warm, spooned into me with her back resting on my chest and her perfectly round bottom up against my-

"Can I peez have mouh sywup Edwood? Peez? Just a litt-oh bit mouh?"

I shook my head quickly to clear it.

"Peez Edwood?" Maddie repeated. Huge, pleading brown eyes looked up at me from an angelically cherub face.

What kind of heartless bastard could ever say 'no' to her?

In my defense, I kept a straight face when I answered. "Alright then. But I'll pour it on for you, and that's it. No more," I confirmed through raised eyebrows.

Her mouth turned up in a huge grin, showing me all her perfect pearly whites. "Thanks Edwood!"

I responded with a huge grin of my own. Alice giggled on the phone. "Boy that little girl has you wrapped around her pinky finger twice - backwards _and_ forwards," she teased. I laughed, unable to deny it.

"What do you want Alice?"

"I actually called to speak to you, since there's no point in trying you at your own place on weekends." She paused. "Have you seen this morning's paper?"

"No. Why, should I?"

"I think you should," she responded in a sing-song voice. "I think you and Bella are going to have a harder time keeping your relationship under wraps after today's Page Six headline,' she sang.

"Fuck," I growled quietly, sighing and running my hands through my hair.

"What? I thought you wanted it all out in the open already. Have you changed your mind?" There was an added edge to Alice's voice.

"No, of course not," I snapped. "But I don't think Bella's going to be too happy about it."

I thought about all the restrictions to our going out in public we'd endured for the past few weeks, in order to keep it on the DL. Bella didn't want to go public until she'd had a chance to tell her father and Jake, AKA The Prick.

The Prick liked to call Bella a few times a week, and every time I was over and his number popped up on the Caller ID I had to fight an almost animalistic urge to pick up the phone and smash that shit against the wall. Unfortunately, that wasn't an option. So instead I'd sit quietly while Bella held a quick conversation with The Prick, glancing at me and giving me an apologetic smile every so often.

"Why the hell does he call you _so_ much?" I'd asked a few nights ago, unable to hold it in any longer. Jesus Christ, he literally called _Every. Other. Day_.

"It's just because he worries about us," Bella had responded sheepishly. "He doesn't know…" – she hesitated – "he doesn't know we've got you. Once I tell him everything, thing's 'll change." I thought I saw a wary expression cross her face momentarily.

I'd nodded rigidly; my eyes tight and my jaw locked, unable to disguise my growing irritation at the situation. For fuck's sake, she was _my girlfriend!_ It made no fucking sense to me that I had to put up with another prick – a prick that was admittedly in love with her – calling her constantly.

I'd try not to listen in on their calls, but fuck it, I was only human. And while most of the time, the subjects they discussed during their quick phone calls were admittedly harmless, even boring at times, there were other times…

"Jake, Maddie and I are doing fine here," I heard Bella say to The Prick a few nights ago, her voice growing lower - taking on a more exasperated tone. My ears had immediately perked up.

"No Jake, that's not an option." I'd narrowed my eyes, pretending to watch whatever shit was on the TV screen. Bella moved into the kitchen. My ears followed.

"Jake, please don't start," she asked in a lower voice. "You know I can't do that." She was quiet for a while, listening. I hadn't been able to help myself. I'd gotten off the couch and followed her into the kitchen.

"Jake, no," she hissed, her back to me as I entered her small kitchen. "Look I've gotta go," she'd said, sounding upset, "I'll talk to you later," and then hung up. When she turned around after a few moments, her face clearly upset, she'd jumped in surprise at finding me right behind her.

"Edward, I-"

"Everything alright?" I'd asked through pursed lips, my arms folded in front of me.

She'd started to nod and then halfway through she'd shaken her head and thrown her arms around me. I'd wrapped my arms around her waist immediately.

"I've gotta tell him," she'd whispered.

"I know," I'd breathed into her hair, smoothing it back. "Why don't you call him back and-"

"No Edward. I still think it's best if I tell him in person. He'll understand better that way."

And although it was fucking killing me, and every time The Prick called I wished I could just reach into the phone and choke the ever-living shit out of him, I nodded and pulled her in closer. _She was mine_, no matter what the fuck The Prick said or did.

Alice's voice brought me back to the present. She sucked her teeth. "I don't think she'll be too upset. It's not that bad really," she assured me. "Tell her to call me when she gets a chance later."

"Yeah, thanks for the info. Talk to you later." I hit the end button on the phone.

After letting Maddie finish her breakfast, I put her coat and hat on, and leaving a note for Bella, we took a quick trip to the corner store.

Ten minutes later I stood outside Bella's building, holding the paper open to Page Six while Maddie skipped around a few short feet from me, my eyes moving from the paper to her every few seconds to make sure she was okay.

"Maddie not too close to the curb," I reminded, waiting for her to meet my gaze and nod her understanding before turning back to the paper.

I switched my attention back to the paper. Alice had been right. It wasn't so bad. They hadn't gotten a clear picture of Bella. There was no way for them to know who she was, to be able to track her down somehow. I finished the article, chuckled to myself and called Maddie back to make our way upstairs, whistling a tune while I carried her up the steps airplane style.

Bella was already dressed and showered and had started picking up the mess Maddie and I had left from our breakfast.

"Where were you two off to so early?" she smiled, loading the dishes into the dishwasher.

"We had to make a quick run for the paper," I answered, snaking my arms around her waist and nuzzling her jaw with my chin. I hadn't shaved yet, and another thing I'd learned about Bella in the past few weeks? My hair growth rubbed up against the most sensitive parts between her shoulders and her face elicited the most wonderful sounds from her throat, somewhere between a moan and whimper. The sound tended to reverberate throughout my entire insides before making a straight beeline south. I could only wonder what kinds of sounds she'd make if I rubbed my chin against other parts of her…

There went the sound. And there went my buddy down below…

"You ate yet? Want me to whip you up a batch of the Swan girls' favorite pancakes?"

She chuckled and turned in my arms, smirking up at me. "You know, believe it or not, before you came along I _was_ able to crack an egg or two for Maddie and me on Sunday mornings."

"Were you now?" I chuckled. "Well it's a good thing I came along when I did. Who knows how much longer you two could've survived on cracked eggs."

"Ha, ha." She rolled her eyes and turned back to the dishwasher.

"What's so interesting in today's paper that you had to make an emergency trip for it?"

"See for yourself," I answered, folding the paper open to Page Six and putting it on the counter next to her.

"I need heoop getting my shoes off," Maddie complained suddenly. I turned to see her sitting on the sofa, kicking her feet back and forth as she tried to dislodge the heel of her shoes against the bottom of the sofa.

I grinned and walked over to help her. "You're giving the bottom of that sofa quite a beating there," I joked. "Let me help you." I bent down and untied her laces.

"Bella the weather's supposed to be pretty good this afternoon. I was thinking after Maddie's nap maybe we could-"

I looked up as I was talking to her, only to find Bella sitting at her kitchen table, white as a ghost, the paper clutched tightly in her right hand as she scanned it. I quickly helped Maddie out of her sneakers and walked back over to Bella.

"What's wrong?" I asked, kneeling beside her.

She looked panic-stricken as her eyes met mine. "Do you think this picture's made it to Washington yet?"

I looked back down at the picture. We were sitting by a window booth, our hands clasped together. One half of my mouth was turned up in a grin as Bella leaned into my ear to whisper something. What had she been saying? Apparently, I'd found it pretty amusing as evidenced by my crooked grin. Bella however, was completely unrecognizable; her face all but hidden behind mine.

"I don't…know" I answered with a quizzical frown. "But Bella, you can't even see your face in that picture."

She brought the picture up closer to her, anxiously inspecting it. "Are you sure?"

"I'm…pretty sure. Unless someone at the CIA's planning on using one of those facial recognition programs. But somehow I doubt my love life's really that high up on the government's priority list."

I expected a smirk from her, a roll of the eyes, a small smile. But she just kept inspecting the picture closely, furiously gnawing on her bottom lip.

"I don't see what the big deal is," I admitted, pulling her lip out from between her teeth. "By this time next week we'll be out in the open, won't we?" She didn't answer. She didn't even look up from the paper.

I used my index finger to gently lift her chin up. She met my gaze through apprehensive eyes.

"Won't we?" I repeated.

"Yes," she answered quickly, the worried look still on her face. "Yes, but my dad and Jake-"

"You're going to talk to your dad and the…Jake in a few days anyway. So what difference would a couple of days make?"

"The difference is I wouldn't want them to find out this way. From a Page Six headline."

"Then maybe you should call them."

"Edward, I can't do this over the phone."

"Can't or won't?"

"What?"

I stared at her, trying with all my fucking might to figure out what was going on inside her head.

I shook my head slowly, keeping my eyes on her, the distressed look in her eyes keeping me from pursuing the subject. I couldn't bare that look.

Carefully, I pulled the paper out of her hands and held on to them. "Bella love, just don't worry about it. Your face is completely hidden; no one will be able to tell."

She took a deep breath, appearing to relax somewhat. "Edward, I'm just really-" – she paused – "I really don't…I don't want them to find out this way." Again, I could've sworn she'd been about to say something else.

"I know Bella." I sighed. "I know."

ooooooooo

We were at my apartment later on that afternoon.

Getting Bella and Maddie inside the building had turned out to be a lesson in Newton's Laws of Motion: An object in motion definitely stays in motion – regardless of how clumsy it tends to be while playing soccer with its boyfriend - when that object does not want to be spotted by the paparazzi. I snorted to myself, pretty sure Bella wouldn't appreciate me thinking of her in terms of an object, and an occasionally clumsy one at that.

While searching for a parking spot, what I'd spotted were a couple of suspicious-looking wide-eyed characters with large lens cameras hanging from their necks standing not too discreetly on the corner of my block. My mind had done the math and come up with the likely scenario that after yesterday's picture, they were looking to put a face to the faceless petite brunette sitting at the coffee booth with me. Needless to say, this knowledge had freaked Bella out even further.

"Oh relax Bella," Rose was laughing. She'd come up for a little while after Bella had offered her a freshly baked brownie. One brownie turned to two and two to three, and now she was sitting at the table and downing her fourth brownie and third cup of milk in the last fifteen minutes. Christ Rose was eating a lot lately. Homegirl was gonna have to chill or she was gonna end up bigger than Emmett minus the overgrown muscles.

"If this has you uptight wait 'til they find out who you are and start following you." Bella's face blanched.

"Not helping Rose," I smirked across the room.

"You think they'll follow me?" Bella asked in a strangled whisper.

"Of course they will," Rose answered through a mouthful of brownie, licking her fingers daintily. "Damn Bella, you're going to have to give me the recipe for this," she murmured distractedly. I snorted; as if a recipe would get her anywhere near a kitchen.

"They won't follow you Bella," I said, glaring at Rose and trying to warn her with my eyes to shut the hell up, but she refused to get the hint.

"Don't lie to her Edward. Of course they're going to follow her. At least at first. Then after a while you and Eddie over here'll become yesterday's news and they won't give a damn anymore. But for those first few weeks you'd better make sure you're wearing clean underwear and a nice uplifting bra," she chuckled, using her clean hand to lift her right breast up. Shit when did Rose's boobs get so big?

Bella looked like she was ready to hyperventilate.

"Rose," I warned.

"I remember when I started dating Emmett," Rose reminisced, picking the walnuts out of her brownie and tossing them in her mouth, still ignoring me. "Those assholes were everywhere I went. And Emmett wasn't even the tabloid golden boy Edward's been for the past few years. It wasn't too bad though. You've just got to practice your brightest smile or your deepest scowl, depending on which way you plan on playing it, though I recommend- Hey Bella, you okay?"

Bella was as white as a ghost.

"Good job Rose," I growled in a low voice, getting up from my chair and going over to kneel beside her like I did at her place.

"Yeah, sure. I'm fine," she answered Rosalie with a weak smile. I frowned. Why was she so panicky?

"Move out of the way," Rose commanded, bumping me out of the way with her hip; which by the way looked a lot curvier than usual.

She looked up at Bella, her mouth twisted in a playful smirk. "Oh come on Bella, I know you better than this. You're not really gonna let a few nerds with cameras scare you are you?"

"Mm mm," Bella shook her head, smiling down at Rose. But I saw something else in her eyes…

"See?" Rose said, turning to sneer at me before getting back up and picking up another brownie off the table. "Bella's one tough cookie. How do you think she keeps those Cartwrights in line? Besides, once Brad and Angie adopt another kid, or even once those two lovebirds from those vampire flicks get spotted canoodling with each other in some exotic locale again, you two will be yesterday's news. 'Cause not for nothing, but that vampire dude is one hot mamojamo. Mmm mmm. Sorry Edward, but not even you can hold a candle to him."

I flipped her the bird without looking at her and moved back to Bella.

"You okay?"

"Sure," she said again, shrugging carelessly. "It's no big deal Edward, it just caught me off guard that's all."

I wasn't too convinced. "You sure?"

She stared at me for a couple of seconds. "Actually-"

The phone rang just then.

"Hold on for a sec, love. Let me just get that."

I was trying to see if I could get Bella's flight upgraded to first class for Wednesday evening. Although I didn't want her to go in the first place, the fact was she was going. I wanted to make sure she and Maddie were at least as comfortable as possible on their trip. I'd put in a call to the airline but I hadn't told Bella yet. She'd be putting up a fight, of that I was sure, and I wanted to confirm the seating changes before I brought it up. I hoped as long as I told her Maddie would be much more comfortable in first class – which she would be – I'd be golden. The airline said they'd call me back to confirm and I was still waiting for their call.

The second I picked up the phone to look at the caller ID my stomach churned.

**Denali, Tanya – Manhattan, NY**

"Fuck," I growled quietly to myself, putting the phone back down without answering it. I stared at it for a couple of seconds, willing it to stop ringing. Of course, it didn't. I moved away from it, walking slowly towards the large bowed window and wishing I could somehow unplug the phone discreetly and throw it across the street into the large trees in Central Park. Finally, it stopped ringing. I had enough time to breathe a quiet sigh of relief before it started ringing again. I closed my eyes tightly and cursed under my breath again.

I didn't even have to look at the caller I.D. to know it was her again. That was always her M.O. Call again and again until she grew bored.

"What the hell Edward, aren't you gonna get that?" Rose asked after the sixth ring or so. I looked over at her, pleading with my eyes for her to drop it, but Rose, dense as ever, didn't get it. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Bella watching me but I was too chicken shit to look directly at her.

The ringing stopped only to start up again about ten seconds later. I turned around and brought my forehead up against the window. I was royally fucked.

"Oh for God's sakes," Rose groaned, standing up and marching towards the phone. "If those are telemarketers just pick up and tell them to f-"

I knew the second she realized who it was because she left her words hanging in the air, while the phone kept its infernal ringing.

I finally made myself look at Bella. She was watching me curiously, no doubt wondering why the hell I was letting the phone ring and ring. I decided to come clean.

"It's actually…Tanya."

"Oh," she said, raising her eyebrows. Her voice registered a little surprise, but nothing else. "Well…why don't you…answer it?"

I frowned at her, confused by her nonchalant attitude and inane question.

"Because I have nothing to say to her Bella," I answered, unable to keep the fact that I thought that should have been plainly obvious out of my voice.

"Oh," she said again, shrugging her shoulders.

The phone rang again. The three of us looked at one another.

Bella stood up and started cleaning up the brownie crumbs and napkins off the table. "Well I'm just going to go clean up the kitchen before I wake Maddie from her nap," she said in a surprisingly calm voice, before heading into the kitchen.

I supposed I should've been grateful that Bella hadn't gotten upset. That she'd shrugged it off and ignored it. But for some reason I wasn't.

While I stood there debating whether I should go into the kitchen after her and make sure nothing was wrong or whether I should just be grateful she hadn't made a big deal about it, the phone un-fucking-believably rang again.

"Jesus," I muttered, running a hand through my hair.

Rose looked at me. "For God's sakes Edward, just pick it up and tell her to fuck off," she hissed in a low voice."

"I've already tried that," I hissed back.

"Well try harder," she insisted. "You're so god damn lucky Bella's so mellow, 'cause I would've been kicking your ass right about now."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "I've told her more than once to leave me alone, what else can I do?" I whisper-yelled.

"Tell her 'Bitch. Fuck. Off!'" she whisper yelled back. "The problem with you Cullen men is that while I'm glad your parents taught you to always respect women, you weren't taught that some of us are not, in fact, ladies. Some of us are, in fact, bitches! And need to be called that once in a while!"

"Ugh," I groaned, the insistent ringing driving me insane.

"Screw this!" Rose moaned, heading for the phone again. "Do you want me to do it? Do you want me to pick up and tell her fuck off bitch for you? 'Cause I'll do it! That's my girl there in that kitchen and-"

I couldn't take it any longer. "You know what Rose, I've got it. I'll take care of it. Just…" – I waved her off – "Just go make sure Bella's okay for me. I've had enough of this shit."

"Atta boy," Rose said, patting me on the shoulder. "You go take care of that skank once and for all," she ordered, before marching into the kitchen.

I steeled myself and took a deep breath before picking up the still ringing phone and hitting 'Answer.'

* * *

**A/N: When I was younger, I used to look up at the stars sometimes and wonder who else was looking up at them. Who knows? Maybe Edward was. Ha, Ha.**

**I plan to post another chapter this week. Either Wednesday or Thursday. And the chapter after that will be posted on time too. Next Tuesday.**

**Leave me reviews guys. Let me know what you're thinking.**


	21. Chapter 20 Snowballing

**Chapter 20 – Snowballing**

**A/N: I promised another update this week…**

*****Important*** - Just to avoid any confusion, a reminder that Edward and Bella DID NOT meet until August. I just wanted to make that clear before you read on.**

**Also, I've received a lot of reviews wondering what the heck Bella's problem is. Everything will be revealed in time. Don't worry. I know you're all getting impatient with her, and frankly so am I. But like I said, you'll all get your answers soon. Just keep in mind that she's been through a lot, and I know we can get in Edward's head and know what he's thinking, but she can't.**

**Finally, I know lots of you are anxious for E & B to have some sexy times. All I can say is if you're all a teensy weensy bit more patient…**

**Still in Edward's head here…**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a while.**

Song Rec:

_Nothin' on You_ – B.O.B. featuring Bruno Mars

* * *

**EPOV**

June 21st (Five months ago):

_I stood out on the wide balcony overlooking the river, feeling the cool breeze of the early morning hours - or late night hours, depending on your view of things – and taking a slow drag from my cigarette, staring out at New Jersey's unimpressive waterfront. The water down below glistened darkly in the moonlight, the waves rippling and breaking softly against each other. The sky had been completely black just a short while ago, but now off in the distance a muted band of dark burgundy prepared to cut straight through and turn it brown. A warm, soothing brown. I cocked my head to the side, snorted and then shook my head with a smirk. Man this was one shitty view. If I were standing on the other side at least I'd be able to see the City's tall skyscrapers raking against the sky; city lights sparkling brightly like stars. _

_Stars. I hadn't thought of stars in a while. I snorted, remembering when I used to wonder if something or someone was waiting for me underneath them. Instinctively, I looked straight up at the brightening sky. Nothing. The only stars in Manhattan were the ones you made for yourself. _

_A small shiver ran down my bare back, brought on from the cool breeze the river whipped up. I turned back to Jersey's poor excuse for a view; nothing more than shitty houses and a mess of factories and industry saved by a handful of hotels and office buildings newly built along its waterfront. But even those were sadly lacking in any character. _

_Sadly lacking in character… Where had I heard those words before? _

_Oh yeah, that's how Carlisle had described me a few days ago, during his twice-yearly attempt at making me see the error of my ways. The whole sentence replayed itself in my mind. "You're almost twenty-eight years old and still sadly lacking in character…' Etc. etc. etc._

_Poor Carlisle; what a disappointment I was to him. He was father to one of America's sweethearts, Madison Avenue's top star, and then…then there was me…New York City's most renowned player. I almost felt sorry for him._

_I shrugged it off and took another deep drag, feeling the air fill my lungs, the menthol burn hot and soothing all at once. I blew it out slowly, watching the grey smoke scatter and swirl. I had many bad habits, but smoking wasn't usually one of them. But today was my twenty-eighth birthday, and if there was ever a time to get all reflective and emo…_

_I snorted. Whatever._

_A rough sultry voice broke me out of my thoughts._

"_Do you know how delicious you look standing there against my balcony in nothing more than your black Calvins?"_

_I didn't answer or look at her. Instead I pulled the cigarette out of my mouth with my thumb and forefinger and, exhaling out the last of the smoke, pressed it butt down on the balcony railing, flicking it over and watching as it fell quickly to the already busy streets below. The city that never slept; perfect for me._

_Cold hands suddenly trailed up my neck, long fingernails raking against my scalp, massaging to the point of pain. I threw my head back slightly and lifted my shoulders from side to side, trying to get the hands out of my hair. _

"_That shit hurts Tanya."_

_She chuckled. "Really? I didn't hear you complaining a few hours ago."_

"_I was probably too drunk to feel it."_

"_You weren't too drunk to feel everything else I did to you."_

_I smirked. She had me there._

"_What are you doing out here dahling? I woke up to give you part two of your birthday present and you were gone. Come back to bed, we've got some unfinished business…" She trailed her red manicured nails from my scalp, down my neck, and over my bare chest, digging them deeper as she went._

_I grabbed her hand firmly as it started to trail lower, her fingernails pressing in more and more and leaving angry red welts down my chest and across my abs._

"_I just told you that shit hurts."_

_She smiled wickedly, standing in front of me in nothing more than a pair of red silk thong panties and a matching red robe, completely open in the front and barely falling to her upper thighs._

"_Does it baby? Come back to bed and I'll kiss it and make it all better," she said in a seductive voice. Her other hand shot out and picked up where the first one had left off, trailing under my underwear and grabbing me – __**hard**__. Tanya was never one for gentle. She liked everything hard and fast._

_I felt myself reacting to her touch, the way she wrapped her hand around me, quick and insistent. No build up; no passion, nothing but roughness. _

_Suddenly my hand was on top of hers, removing it from inside my boxers. "You know, after last night, I don't think I'll be able to get it up for a few days."_

_She snorted. "Bullshit. It's up right now."_

_It was. But…for some strange reason, it wasn't in the mood. But how the fuck do you tell a woman, and a woman like Tanya, that you're not in the mood to screw her?_

_I smiled crookedly at her, the smile I knew drove 'em all crazy, and leaned into her neck, the strong smell of Chanel Number Five mixed with Vodka assaulting my senses. _

"_I'll make it up to you later baby, you know that," I murmured. And then I bit her earlobe – hard. See how she liked being treated roughly._

_Unfortunately, she liked it very much._

"_Ooh," she moaned, grabbing my shoulders. "I don't want it later. I want it now!" she demanded._

_I rolled my eyes and moved away from her, grabbing on to the balcony with both hands and staring across the river. I could feel her eyes on me._

_I drew in a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "Tanya, do you ever wonder what else is out there?"_

"_What else is out there?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_What? Like, aliens you mean?"_

_I shook my head and rolled my eyes again._

"_No, not like aliens. I mean, like, do you ever wonder if there's more to life than this?"_

_She was silent for a few seconds. "I don't understand what you're asking."_

_I let out a frustrated breath of air before turning to look at her. She was a beautiful woman, no doubt. Tall, only a couple of inches shorter than me. A body any model would kill for. Round, firm breasts that had recently been surgically enhanced, long, strong legs that could wrap around my entire waist. Pouty, botox-filled lips. Fiery, strawberry blonde curls that hung to her waist. Blue eyes the color of the sky. And fuck, she was good in bed._

_But…_

_There was no warmth to her. When she looked at me it was through cool, expressionless eyes. Her gaze made me feel nothing. When her arm touched my shoulder, it felt cold. When she smiled, there was nothing but emptiness behind the curve of her lips. When she laughed, it irritated my ear drums. When we fucked, it was just that._

_But that had always been the case. Why the hell was it bothering me now?_

"_I'm asking, are you satisfied with your life? Don't you ever want more?"_

"_Of course I want more," she answered quickly, a confused smile on her lips. "As a matter of fact, there was this Prada bag in the window of Bergdorf-Goodman the other day and I went in to get it and-"_

"_No, no, no," I shook my head impatiently. "I don't mean bags and clothes and trips and parties! I mean __**more**__." I'd subconsciously put a fisted hand against my chest as I spoke. Tanya's eyes trailed down slowly, watching where my fist rested._

_She smirked, putting a hand on her waist. "Alright, who is she now?"_

_I frowned. "Who the hell is who?"_

_She sighed with impatient amusement. "Who is it you want to sleep with now? Look, just go get it out of your system and then give me a call. It's the same thing with you every few months when a new girl catches your eye," she laughed, looking at me as if I were an amusing little toy. "We fight, you fuck her, we make up, you fuck me." She laughed again._

_I stared at her, wondering how the hell I'd ended up here. Not just out on her balcony with the crappy-as-all-hell view of New Jersey at four-thirty in the morning on my birthday; but living this life. This cold, sterile life. _

_I'd loved it once, I couldn't deny it. The girls, the sex, the celebrity; everything and everyone at my beck and call. But was that all there was? As I asked myself that question for perhaps the hundredth time in the past few weeks, I felt the void again, the one that had formed suddenly, out of nowhere. The void I kept desperately trying to fill with more sex, more drinking, more partying, more work. More of everything my life had become._

_But it kept growing; it kept spreading; it was festering. More of the same wasn't working._

"_And this is okay with you Tanya? This fucked up arrangement you and I have? Where we use each other at our convenience? Where we each do our own thing whenever the hell we feel like it?" _

_Because it wasn't just me picking fights when someone new caught __**my**__ eye. _

"_Where's the respect Tanya? Where's the commitment? Where's the-" I stopped._

_She eyed me speculatively. "The what? The love?" she snorted. "Is that what you were going to say? The love?" She laughed hard, throwing her head back. "Oh dahling, you are so amusing sometimes. I don't love you and you don't love me. That's nothing new. We have a good time and great sex together. What more do you want?"_

"_I don't know!" I growled. "I don't know." I ran my hand through my scalp, feeling a bruise where her fake nail tips had scratched me. Plastic witch. "But there has to be more. I have to believe there's more."_

"_More as in 'love' Edward?" she snickered. "Are you really going to stand here and tell me that you, Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy, believe in love?" She shook her head. "True love is a fairy tale dahling, you should know this. It's an emotion dreamt up by those who aren't as…" - she held a hand up and out in front of her as she searched for the right word – "privileged as we are. 'I may not have money,' she said in a weepy voice, putting a hand over her non-existent heart, and with a sad face mimicking some made up unfortunate creature, "but at least I have my true love, and that's all that really matters. In the end, true love will conquer all!" She burst out into fits of laughter, holding her arms around her well-toned torso._

_Who was this woman in front of me? Had I really once been attracted to her? Had I really once enjoyed spending time with her? Had I once felt proud to have my picture snapped with her, because she was so tall and sexy and glamorous? Had I actually felt smug when I saw other guys checking her out in her tight-ass clothing and short god-damned skirts?_

"_I can't do this anymore."_

_She stopped laughing and quickly looked up at me, cold blue eyes no longer amused._

_She huffed. "I suppose we're due for a break. I got a call from a friend in Cannes the other day. She wants to get some friends together for a few weeks. Seems she's got some new neighbors that put on some kick-ass parties-"_

"_I'm not talking about a break. I can't do __**this**__ anymore," I said waving my forefinger between the both of us. "You and I, we don't make sense. This relationship makes no sense. There is nothing between us. No affection, no respect. There's just no point in it," I said, shaking my head and shrugging._

"_We have some good fucking sex."_

"_That's not enough."_

"_What do you want now Edward?" she asked in an exasperated tone, a scowl on her spray-tanned face. "You want to find someone to marry? To have your babies and live happily ever after with? You?" she snickered. "Please. You wouldn't know how to be a husband or a father if you hired Bill Cosby to show you." _

_Marriage and kids were the last thing on my mind, but for some reason her words infuriated me._

"_You don't know shit about me Tanya," I growled, scowling against the wind._

"_I know you better than you know yourself dahling. Every time you go up to Long Island to see your family you come back with a stick up your ass. You're so easy to read Edward. You think you want to be like them; all happy and in love." She spit the word out as if it were a curse. "But that's not what you want. That's not who you are. __**This**__ is who you are!" _

"_I don't know who I am Tanya!" I turned and yelled at her. She laughed, the scowl still on her face. "And neither do you! I don't know what I want! All I know is that I don't want this. I'm sorry. But this is it for us."_

"_Pssht!" she snorted, looking out at the Hudson below. "I'll be hearing from you in a couple of months."_

"_No. You won't," I said evenly, tired of fighting. Tired of all of it._

_She turned to look at me. Her expression was cool, devoid of anything other than irritation. She smiled unemotionally._

"_Like I said, get it out of your system, and then call me. We'll have fun again soon dahling."_

_I turned and walked out of her balcony, gathering my clothes and leaving her place for the last time._

oooooooooo

**Present Day:**

"Tanya," I said roughly into the phone.

"Edward dahling, I was beginning to think you weren't home. I was going to try your cell phone next."

"Tanya, I thought I made things pretty clear last time we saw each other."

She let out a high-pitched laugh. I rubbed my ear with my index finger. "Oh dahling, I won't hold what happened that night against you. I know you were still mad at me for hurting you the night of your sister's party. No hard feelings. When can I see you and make it up to you dahling?"

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger. "Tanya, I really don't know how else to spell it out for you," I said in an exasperated tone, while at the same time struggling to keep my voice low. I could faintly hear Bella and Rosalie talking in the kitchen.

"I'm trying to do this right. I don't want to be an asshole with you. I don't want things to spiral into an ugly fight or shouting match. Please. Try to understand. I don't want you to make it up to me. I don't want to see you. You and I are over. For good. I don't want a relationship with you. I don't want a quick hook up. I. Do. Not. Want. You."

She remained silent for a few moments, and I let myself hope that maybe I'd finally gotten through to her.

"That was a really nice picture of you in today's paper. You looked very…content," she giggled.

I ignored her comment. "I just want to make sure you understand once and for all. Please stop calling me. You and I have nothing to discuss."

"Oh but we do," she disagreed. "You've got to tell me what was so amusing, what had you grinning so widely in that picture. Enquiring minds wanna know."

I listened for Bella and Rosalie again. I could still hear them talking in the kitchen. God, all I wanted was to get confirmation from Tanya that she wouldn't call me again, and then I could hang up in peace.

"Tanya, I just want to know that you understand. That you won't call here anymore."

"Is she there right now?" Tanya asked curiously. "The petite brunette from the picture that has you…what did they call it? Oh yeah, hooked," she giggled again.

"Just tell me you won't call again."

"They said they had nooo idea who she was," she continued in an amused tone. "But you know, I took a closer look at it a little while ago, and, hmm, something about her looks familiar."

My hand tightened around the phone. "I'm not doing this with you Tanya. I just want to hear you say you understand."

"Oh I understand dahling," she chuckled. "I understand I've given you months now to get this out of your system. I think I've been very patient actually."

"I told you!" - I yelled into the phone before remembering Bella in the kitchen and Maddie napping in the spare room. "I told you," - I continued through gritted teeth, quickly moving to the terrace and closing the glass doors behind me – "this wasn't a temporary break. There is no on again, off again this time. This has been over for months."

Her voice hardened. "You think you're in love Edward? Is that what this is? You think you've found your happily ever after? You're a fucking moron if that's what you think. I know you. I know you better than you know yourself!"

"I've told you before," I yelled, no longer trying to reign myself in, "you don't know shit about me!"

"Really?" she yelled back. "I know all this is just one of your little games! I know sooner or later you _will_ be back! 'Serious competition for Tanya Denali my ass!'" she quoted off the paper. "_I_ know how you operate! Does _she_? Does your petite brunette bitch know what you _really_ are?"

"Don't you _ever_ fucking call her that you god damn-" I yelled at the top of my lungs. I closed my eyes, trying to regain control here. She was doing this shit on purpose, trying to make this about Bella because she _knew_, somehow she knew that's what would make me lose it.

"Enough of this shit!" My voice shook with rage. I hoped the glass doors were enough to muffle it. "I didn't want to do this with you Tanya, but you just don't fucking get it! I. Am not. Coming. Back! Stay the fuck away from me. Don't fucking call me, don't come looking for me. This fucking game is over!" I hung up on her.

"Fuck!" I growled to myself, phone in hand, glaring out at the park across the street. I inhaled deeply, trying to regulate my breathing before I went back inside. When I turned around though, Bella and Rosalie were sitting on the sofa just inside, Rose glaring at me and Bella looking extremely uncomfortable. I took a deep breath and opened the glass doors back inside.

"What the hell happened Edward? We could hear you yelling from all the way in the kitchen." Rosalie was in full inquisition mode. Bella on the other hand, wouldn't even look at me. She was too busy playing with her hands.

"Rose, you mind if I speak to Bella alone?" I kept my eyes on her, but she wouldn't look up.

Rose pursed her lips. "Yeah, sure," she replied after a short hesitation. She turned to leave, picking up one last brownie on a napkin first. Before walking out the door she turned back.

"You told her to fuck off though, didn't you?"

I nodded but didn't elaborate.

As soon as Rose was out the door I walked over to Bella, ready to tell her everything.

"Bella, I-"

She looked up at me suddenly, a pleasant smile on her face. "I'm going to go wake up Maddie."

I frowned. "Bella wait. I want to talk about-"

"Edward, Maddie's been sleeping for a couple of hours already. You know if she naps too long she won't sleep tonight."

I looked at her with a confused frown. She just heard me screaming my lungs out with my ex-girlfriend out on the terrace and she wanted to go wake up Maddie?

"I think we should talk about-"

She put a hand on my cheek gently. "You took care of it right?"

I nodded my head cautiously, putting one hand over hers. It felt so warm and soothing.

"Then we don't need to delve into it any further."

My frown deepened. She spoke the words gently, her smile soft and soothing, but there was something in her eyes…

Before I could question it any further, she lifted herself on her toes and gave me a sweet, tender kiss. I tightened my hold on her hand.

"Now I'm going to go wake Maddie, otherwise it's going to be a long night."

She smiled and walked away, leaving me standing there more than a little confused.

OOOOOOOOOO

At work the next day, I was still feeling puzzled by how Bella had reacted to the whole Tanya incident. For the rest of the day she'd actually been fine, if maybe a little more quiet than usual. But that could've just been my imagination. Yet there was something. Something I couldn't put a finger on. Something I couldn't see; not in her actions or her words, but something I felt. Like a small pull on one of the strings of the fabric that made up our relationship.

Or maybe I was just being an emo ass because Bella and Maddie would be leaving for Washington in a couple of days. I hadn't been away from them for more than a day since Bella and I had started dating. An anxious knot had formed in my stomach in the past couple of days, and as the day before Thanksgiving moved closer and closer, the knot tightened more and more.

Admittedly, I wasn't taking the whole separation thing very well. Even if it did bring us closer to finally coming out of the closet about our relationship, and to her finally telling her dad and The Prick about us. Although wondering how both her dad and The Prick would react to the news – and how Bella would react to whatever they said to her while she was thousands of miles away from me – was adding to my stress.

The airline had finally called back again last night after I'd taken Bella and Maddie home. Their reservations for first class were paid for and confirmed, and the only thing left to do was to tell Bella about it.

I'd therefore sent her an email asking her to come up and see me before lunch, because I knew she wouldn't make a scene in the office about it, and when it came to her, I was apparently quite the chicken shit.

When I heard her soft rasps on the door, I drew in a deep breath and readied myself.

"Come in," I said in a professional voice.

Bella opened the door quietly and walked in, looking beautiful in her pencil skirt and fresh white blouse.

"You wanted to see me Edward?" she asked in an equally professional voice. Her face was a blank mask, but I could see the curiously amused twinkle in her eyes, even though she still refused to meet my gaze at work.

I smirked. "Yes please Bella. Would you mind taking a seat and closing the door behind you?" I said, signaling with my hand towards the leather sofa in front of my desk.

She drew in a deep breath and gave me a reproving look – without meeting my eyes – but went ahead and closed the door. I chuckled lightly.

She slowly took a seat, her lips twitching. "I hope this isn't going to be a repeat of last time I was in here, because if it is-"

I chuckled again and cut her off. "No, it's not. Unless you want it to be?" I asked with a raised eyebrow, leaning over my desk in her direction.

She turned her gaze towards the window, fighting a smile. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"That doesn't answer the question."

She lost the fight with the smile. "I think I should plead the fifth on that one."

"See, when you say things like that, you make it hard for me to stay focused. You've got to be the strong one here, because I'm telling you right now, if it were up to me, I'd jump over this desk right now and pin you against the-"

She closed her eyes and cut me off, a bright red blush creeping up from her neck and all over her beautiful face. "Edward, please focus," she asked in a low voice, her chest slightly heaving.

I smirked and leaned back against my chair. She was right. I had to stay focused, but it was just so hard, knowing she was going to be away from me for four whole days. And I hadn't had a chance to tell her how much I loved her yet. And I hoped - but she was just so god-damned reserved that I couldn't be sure – that she felt the same for me. And Jesus it was getting harder and harder to be around her without trying to touch her everywhere, to rip that god-damned pencil skirt off and-

"Edward?" She was watching through raised eyebrows.

That's right. Focus. I cleared my throat. There was only one way to do this, and it was by being direct.

"Bella, I just wanted to- I mean, well I know that- That is- I just wanted you to- You know-"

She frowned. I drew in a deep breath.

"I called the airline and got you and Maddie first class seats to Washington on your flight. It's a long flight Bella and I wanted you both to be more comfortable. I remember you said Maddie got a little antsy the last time, and I figured this way you'd both have more room, and Maddie could move around a bit more. She could sleep better to if she wanted to. And you don't have to worry about any assholes complaining about her bumping their seats."

I stopped and waited for her reaction. Knowing Bella, I knew she wouldn't fly off the handle or anything, especially not here at work. But I'd pretty much expected her to be a bit upset, at least at first, since she had this thing about being given anything.

But she just stared at me blankly. Neither anger nor gratitude reflected in her expression.

"Why would you do that?" she asked in a flat tone.

"I told you. I wanted you both to be more comfortable."

She was silent for a few seconds. "Edward, I've flown coach my whole life. I'm comfortable enough in coach."

"Are you kidding me Bella?" I asked with a half-smile. "From what I've heard, they crowd those seats in coach closer than cattle. And they feed them like cattle too!" I chuckled. "In first class, you and Maddie can spread out comfortably, the food will be more decent, and you don't have to worry about anyone sitting half their ass on you."

She just stared at me. Finally, she murmured quietly. "Edward I'm not first-class and I never will be."

I frowned. "What? What does that mean?"

She simply continued to stare at me with a funny expression on her face, sad and resigned. Eventually she shook her head.

"Return them. Maddie and I are keeping our original seats."

"But Bella-"

She stood up, her face blank again. "Thank you, but Maddie and I are staying in coach." There was no hesitation in her tone, no room for persuasion or argument.

She began to walk away but before reaching the door turned around to face me again. She was smiling again, but it was the same smile she'd offered me yesterday after the Tanya thing. Like there was something else behind it.

"Will I see you after work today?" she asked.

"Of course," I answered right away, surprised by the question. She nodded and smiled again before walking out and leaving me even more frustrated and confused then I'd been yesterday.

The work day just went downhill from there. We got a call from the Wheat-a-Bits people that one of the commercials needed to be reshot. Emmett, Jasper and I spent the whole morning on the phone with a bunch of assholes, and by one we decided to head out and grab a quick, late lunch before rushing back up to make a few more calls. The city had awoken that morning to a surprise snow fall, pretty early in the season, and throughout the morning the snow had continued coming down at a steady pace, blanketing the city streets in a white winter wonderland that would be turning into black, soggy slush before the evening rush hour.

As we stepped off the elevators, some sixth sense alerted me to the fact that Bella was nearby. I felt it in the way my body tingled in anticipation of being near her. My eyes quickly scanned the lobby, while Emmett – taking a look outside through the glass lobby – discussed the idea about possibly cutting the work day short and sending everyone home.

I was nodding my agreement when I found her, a few feet away with her back to me. Her long wool coat was covered in wet flakes of snow, the back of her hair shiny and glistening with the powdery substance. Rosalie stood next to her, and abruptly both women laughed.

That wasn't what made me stop dead in my tracks though, my pulse quickening and a scowl forming on my face.

That fucker James was standing with them. With _her_.

He was facing me, and as I stood there watching, all of them unaware of my presence, I could clearly see his obsession with her; the way he looked at her, with hope and desire, completely unaware that she was already _mine_.

Emmett and Jasper stopped when I did, and once they followed my line of vision, realized what had me scowling so widely.

"Ed man, chill and keep walking. He's just talking to them," Jasper coaxed.

I didn't answer. I didn't move.

Emmett snorted. "Edward, that fucker's got nothing on us Cullens. Come on," he said, clapping me on the back to guide me, "let's go get something to eat so we can get back upstairs."

But I didn't budge. Instead, I blocked out every other sound, every other movement and focused intently on the scene a few feet away.

"…you enjoyed these last time when we went for pizza, and since you haven't been able to come with me again, I figured I'd bring you back a slice," James said to Bella.

Bella looked down at the pizza box James was trying to hand her. With her back to me, I couldn't see the expression on her face, but her voice sounded kind as she answered him.

"Thanks James, that was really thoughtful of you, but Rose and I already ate lunch."

James' face fell in disappointment. _That's right fucker, my girl already ate, so take your slice and shove it up your ass._

His eyes suddenly brightened. "Well why don't you take it anyway? You could eat it later. Or maybe save it for your little girl, Maggie is it?"

Maddie would eat that slice of pizza over my cold, dead body.

"It's Maddie actually," Bella corrected him, "and she doesn't like any toppings on her pizza. But thank you James for thinking of us."

A sharp pain twisted its way up my chest at the realization that her thank you to him for bringing her a cold slice of pizza had sounded more genuine than the indifferent thanks she gave me for her airline tickets.

But James still wouldn't give up. "Well, at least take it for later then?" he plead insistently. "Maybe if you get hungry again this afternoon…"

I waited to hear her answer, to hear her tell him no again, she didn't want it, she'd already eaten, Maddie didn't want his shitty cold slice, take it and stick it.

"Well, alright James. Thanks. I'll take it for later."

My heart dropped out of my chest as I heard her words and watched as James' face lit up like the fucking Rockefeller Christmas Tree.

The three of them turned and walked our way, towards the elevators.

"Fuck," Jasper muttered quietly.

Bella finally saw us, her face blushing as it always did when we met up at work around others. She smiled at the three of us.

Emmett gave his wife a quick wink.

"You ladies coming back from lunch?" Jasper asked pleasantly, addressing himself towards Rose and Bella, even though James had stopped with them.

"Yup," Rose answered, and then some other stuff came out of her mouth but I didn't hear it. I was too busy glaring at the god-damned pizza box in Bella's hand. Daydreaming about pulling it out of her hand and-

"Hey, what'cha got there Bella?" I heard Emmett ask. I snapped out of it long enough to listen to Bella's response.

"Oh. Uhm, it's just a slice of pizza." She bit her lip and I hated the fact I couldn't do anything about it. "James gave it to us-," she began, glancing up at me quickly.

"Mind if I have it if you're not gonna eat it?" Emmett asked with a sly smile.

"Sure," she responded enthusiastically, quickly handing over the box. Emmett took it from her and ripped it open. He took a quick look at James before taking a bite.

"You don't mind man, right?"

"Uh, no, 'course not," James stammered. Emmett proceeded to shove the slice in his mouth.

Once they'd walked away towards the elevator bank and we continued on our way outside, Emmett turned to me.

"Jesus Christ dude, chill out. The damn slice is gone, okay? Shit, you looked like you were ready to snatch that shit out of the box and shove it up his ass." He shook his head and wrapped his hand into a fist, bringing it up to the middle of his chest and pounding on it a couple of times before belching loudly. "Wasn't that good anyway," he muttered as he walked through the revolving doors. I followed behind, too pissed off to say anything.

OOOOOOOOOOO

We left work early that afternoon because of the snow. As usual, Bella met me in the garage, because God forbid anyone saw us together, especially after yesterday's Page Six column.

I didn't mention anything about the airline tickets or the pizza incident. I only had two days left with her before her trip to Washington. In the privacy of the Volvo, I didn't ask her why she could accept something from James but not from me. I didn't ask her why her voice registered more emotion when she thanked him for the pizza than when she refused my tickets. I chose to ignore it all. I didn't ask her what she'd really been thinking the other night out underneath the stars, or why she'd hesitated when I'd asked her if she trusted me. I didn't ask why she was still so freaked out about everyone finding out about us, even though in a couple of days she'd be speaking to her dad and The Prick. I kept it all to myself.

We picked up Maddie from the babysitter's house, spending a few minutes having a cup of coffee with Sue before heading out.

Maddie gazed out the car window – fascinated by the falling snow as I strapped her into her car seat, adjusting the belt so that it fell just right. I'd become an expert at it in the past few weeks.

"Mommy, Edwood, can we go play in the pawk in the snow?" she asked as I turned the car on.

"That sounds like fun," I agreed, winking at Maddie through the rear view mirror. She giggled.

"I don't know," Bella said hesitantly. "I've got to pack tonight so we could go see grandpa and we haven't even had dinner yet."

"How about we have dinner at that little restaurant by the riverfront, and then take Maddie to play for a little while afterwards? This way there's no dinner to clean up after at home. I'll help you get Maddie ready for bed later so you can do your packing," I suggested.

Bella was still hesitant. "What if…what if the paparazzi-"

I rolled my eyes. "Bella, we'll be at a small restaurant in Brooklyn, and then at the park. I'm not suggesting dinner at The 21 Club and then skating at Rockefeller Center. I doubt the paparazzi will be around."

She considered it for a few seconds before slowly nodding.

After dinner, we took a walk to the riverfront. The snow had stopped falling, blanketing the streets with enough to pound out into round balls and fling around playfully. Which Bella was having a great old time doing to me. I laughed as I watched her pick up another handful of snow and pat it between her gloved hands. The cool air and excitement had given her cheeks a rosy tint, her eyes twinkled wickedly. The sun was going down, the white snow giving the streets a glowing appearance. Bella appeared to have relaxed as the sun went down, and I felt myself relaxing too, letting the stress of the day melt away as I enjoyed an early winter snowfall with my two favorite girls in the world.

When Bella's latest snowball hit me square in the jaw, I stalked over to her and picked her up over my shoulder, laughing as she squealed in surprise.

"Edward, put me down right now!"

"Yes ma'am," I agreed, pretending to drop her over a small, pristine mountain of snow.

"Aaah! Oh my God, that's cold!" she screeched, her eyes growing wide.

"Now you know how all those snowballs felt," I teased her. I wrapped my arms around her, preventing her body from falling deeper into the snow. "Don't worry, I won't let you get too cold."

"You promise?" she asked with a smirk.

"Uhuh." I kissed her lips gently. Once, twice. I felt her shiver. "You want me to warm you up?" I asked, running my nose up and down her cheek.

"Uhuh," she responded, gazing at me intently. I brought my mouth back down to hers, kissing her more deeply this time, my tongue parting her lips and quickly meeting up with hers. Instantly, I felt myself getting warmer, my body tingling from the heat of her lips, her tongue. She came up for air, her warm breath blowing on me.

"Warmer?" I asked, running my lips and my own warm breath under her scarf and across her neck.

"Uhuh," she responded breathlessly, though I felt her shiver again. She placed her gloved hands around my face. "I think we'd better stop," she murmured quietly. "I'm not sure these are appropriate warm-up techniques for a public setting."

"Only if you promise me you'll let me warm you up again when we're in a more private setting."

She pulled me so that she could place her lips on me once more, kissing me softly. Something in the way her eyes searched mine pierced my heart; a mixture of happiness and sadness, as if she were trying to memorize my face, this moment.

"I promise," she whispered quietly.

We went to sit on one of the benches overlooking the river, the bright lights across the river at the South Street Seaport Pier shining brighter in the approaching twilight. In the middle of the harbor, the lights on Liberty island came on, Lady Liberty's torch ablaze in the blood red sky.

We talked and laughed as Maddie played a few feet from us, making snow angels on the ground and dancing happily, much the same way I vaguely recalled Alice would when we were kids. I relaxed even more, pushing the questions deeper into the recesses of my mind as the evening appeared to begin on a better note than the morning had.

A couple of young boys had come to play around Maddie, and by the way she spoke to them I realized she knew them. One looked to be a bit younger than her, and the other looked a bit older, maybe about six or so. Maddie and the younger of the two boys made more snow angels, while the bigger boy watched. They were playing fine at first, when during one of my routine glances in her direction I heard her little voice.

"No Matthew! That's my snow angoh! Don't wuin it!"

I frowned, turning my eyes to the older of the two boys, who was lying in Maddie's snow angel, moving his arms and legs up and down in the snow, replacing Maddie's imprint with his own. I started to get up. Bella put an arm out in front of me.

"Edward, it's okay. They're just playing. They're little kids. They can work it out."

I pursed my lips, not entirely convinced, but if Bella said it was okay, who was I to contradict her? I kept my eyes on them more, watching as Maddie went to make another snow angel, only to have the little boy called Matthew do the same thing again.

"Stop Matthew! You-uh messing up my snow angohs," she cried in frustration.

I groaned. "Bella-"

"Edward, I'm watching them too. If he gets carried away, then I'll say something. Otherwise, Maddie can handle it."

Again, Maddie made another angel. I glared at Matthew, who was making one of his own snow angels now. I frowned, my memory tugging at the edges…

"Hey, is that the same Matthew Maddie was complaining about once? That pushed her off the swings or something?"

Bella frowned, her eyes intently on Maddie too. "Yeah," she said with a twist of her lips. "He's usually not too bad, but sometimes…" she shook her head, and glanced towards one of the benches to our left, where two women sat talking animatedly with each other.

"His mom doesn't really pay much attention to what he's doing and sometimes he can get a little out of hand."

I took another look at the women on the bench. They were hard to make out in the dark, but there loud voices carried in the wind, talking and giggling and not even bothering to glance in the kid's direction. I shook my head.

Suddenly, Maddie gave a loud cry. My eyes immediately whipped back to her.

"Matthew no!"

The little fucker wasn't even bothering to lay down in her snow angel this time. He just stood over it, kicking snow into it and ruining it and laughing. Maddie started crying and ran back to us.

"Mommy, Edwood, Matthew wuined my snow angohs!" I picked her up quickly and she threw her arms around me, burying her face in the crook of my neck. I felt her hot tears rolling down her face.

I'd always considered myself to be a man of more than average intelligence; a man who knew that there were certain unbreakable rules to follow to be an accepted member of a civilized society.

1) Always hold the door open for a lady; 2) Always pay for dinner; 3) Never call a woman the 'B' word; 4) Never hit a woman; and 5) Never strike a child.

At that moment, it took all the restraint I had not to break rule number five and beat the ever-living shit out of that little fuck-head.

"Shh," I murmured in Maddie's ear as she kept crying. "It's okay, princess. Edward'll take care of it." I gently handed Maddie to Bella. She took her from my arms and looked up at me, and although her eyes held the hint of a warning, she wasn't even going to try to stop me this time.

"Edward, don't forget he's just a little boy. Just tell him that wasn't nice and leave it at that, okay?"

I nodded but made no promises.

I stalked over to little Matthew Fuck-head, my hands clenched at my sides. _Don't forget rule number five, don't forget rule number five,_ I chanted to myself.

"Hey buddy, mind if we have a talk?"

Little Matthew Fuck-head looked up at me with widening eyes. _That's right little fucker. You messed with the wrong little girl_.

"That wasn't very nice what you just did to Maddie's snow angel there. I'm sure you've been told that there's a right way and a wrong way to treat a little lady. And that right there little man, was definitely the wrong way."

He stared at me as if I'd just spoken to him in Swahili.

"Is there a problem?" A woman's voice suddenly asked from behind me. I whipped around, trying to keep myself from responding that the problem was that she seemed to be raising an asshole.

The woman walked over to me, the frown on her face suddenly morphing into a wide smile as she shamelessly looked me up and down. I forced myself not to roll my eyes.

"I'm just trying to explain to the little man here how to treat little girls," I said in an even voice.

The woman looked from her son over to where Maddie was still bundled in Bella's arms, while Bella whispered something in her ear. I saw her glance up at me for a second before turning her attention back to Maddie.

"Was he bothering the little girl? Matthew, say you're sorry," she said in an amused tone, looking over at me and giggling before flicking her long bleached blonde hair forward with one hand. I turned away from her to Matthew.

"Sorry," Matthew muttered without even bothering to look at me or Maddie.

"Sorry is well and good, just make sure it doesn't happen again," I said, keeping my eyes on the boy.

I started to turn away when the woman called out quickly, "I'm Irina by the way."

I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath. I'd turn around and nod or some shit and then walk back to Maddie and Bella.

"Edward?" another female voice called out, just as I was turning to nod at the first woman. "Edward Cullen?"

I looked up to where the voice was coming from. Another woman had come to stand with the first one, tall and blonde, and as soon as I looked at her I felt like groaning. Instead, I smiled coolly and stayed in place.

"Edward, it is you! I thought it sounded like you, but it's so dark out here that I couldn't tell right away."

"Kate. How are you?" I asked, cursing my god-damned luck.

"I'm good Edward," she responded enthusiastically. "I haven't seen you in a long time." The first woman looked between me and Kate enviously. I stole a look over at Maddie and Bella. Maddie was on her mother's lap, appearing calmer and talking to her quietly. Bella's eyes quickly flashed towards me but just as quickly turned back to Maddie.

Reluctantly I turned my attention back to Kate. "Yeah, it's been a few years."

"About four actually," she said quickly.

I nodded, as if agreeing, when in reality I had no clue when I'd seen Kate last.

"Well, it was good to see you again-" I said, starting to turn again.

"What have you been up to?" she asked. I rolled my eyes internally.

"Not much," I said dismissively, anxious to end the conversation. Unfortunately, proper etiquette called for me to return the question. "And you?"

"Oh I got married about three and a half years ago," she said, sticking her left hand out to show me a yellow band with a huge rock on it, "to an investment banker."

"Congratulations," I said with a smile.

"Thanks," she giggled. "Yeah, well. A girl can only wait so long for you to call her back."

Fuck. I glanced over at Bella again. Maddie was still on her lap and Bella had her cell phone out, focusing intently on it.

"And then the Rockette thing started to get boring. You can only kick your legs up so many thousand times before the whole thing gets old. And those outfits are really uncomfortable. So I found myself a husband, we moved to the suburbs," she said with obvious disdain, "popped a kid out, and here we are."

I nodded again. "Alright, well, great to see you-"

Her friend suddenly nudged her hard with her elbow.

"Oh. This is my friend Irina," Kate said begrudgingly.

Irina stuck her hand out quickly. "Nice to meet you Edward," she said with a huge smile.

Reluctantly, I put my hand out to shake hers. "Nice to meet you too." She held on to my hand for far too long. I had to practically pry it out of hers. I stood there awkwardly.

"Well, I'm going to-"

"When Kate told me she dated you for a while I thought she was full of shit, but oh my God, I can't believe it…"

"See, I told you I fu-, I mean I told you I knew him," she said, smiling up at me.

Was this really happening?

Again, I turned towards Bella. She was still playing with her cell phone.

"Do you come here a lot Edward?" the bleached blonde named Irina asked in an obviously flirty tone. She went on before I could answer. "Kate and I like to hang out here by the river, letting the two little monsters there play and tire themselves out before we take them home." - she said with a smirk, before turning to face her friend. "As a matter of fact, Kate don't you have to be on your way? Garrett will be home soon."

Kate scowled openly at her. Irina smiled and turned back to me. "I'm divorced, so I have no one waiting for me at home."

I sighed openly, not caring if I looked as disgusted as I felt.

"Actually, I've gotta head out too," I finally managed to get out. "You two take care of yourselves and I'd appreciate it if you spoke to Matthew about behaving himself with Maddie," I added with a serious look in Irina's direction.

At the mention of her name Maddie came bounding towards me, standing in front of me with her arms up; her sign for me to pick her up. I obliged happily. "Edwood I'm tie-uhd," she said, in a tone I'd never heard from her. She turned to face Kate and Irina, her eyes narrowed and a deep frown on her forehead. "I wanna go home. I wanna go home _now_."

"Cute kid," Irina said with a fake smile. She jerked her head behind me, towards where Bella sat on the bench. "Is her mom over there your friend?"

"She's actually my-" I turned around towards Bella, only when my eyes landed on the bench, she wasn't there anymore. "She's my…" I said slowly, scanning the riverfront quickly, until I finally spotted her, walking slowly in the opposite direction.

"Look I've gotta go," I said quickly, no longer worrying about manners or etiquette. "Take care."

With Maddie still in my arms, I took a few steps before Kate called out to me again.

"Edward. Edward wait!"

I groaned audibly this time before turning around.

"What?"

She smiled widely, not in the least fazed by my impatience.

"I just wanted to tell you, I've still got friends over at Radio City. If you want to take in the Christmas Show this year I can get you some front row seats." She glanced at Maddie in my arms. "And the little girl too, I guess."

"Thanks, but-"

"Or, you know, if you want me to give you a private back-stage tour, I'm pretty sure I can arrange that too," she added with a slow smile.

"I'm not interested Kate. Take care." I turned and walked away, wrapping Maddie safely in my arms.

It took me a few seconds to catch up with her, seconds during which I felt as if my heart were about to beat out of my chest while I readied myself for what I was sure was going to be a seriously pissed-off Bella.

"Bella," I called out, when I was just a few steps behind her. She stopped but didn't turn around. I caught up to her in two long strides.

"Bella, please listen to-"

"You ready?" she asked with a small smile when I rounded her.

I frowned.

"What?"

"Are you ready to go?" she asked again with that pleasant smile again, her voice quiet and even.

I stared at her. "Yes."

"Okay," she said and started walking again, her hands buried deep in her coat pockets.

I stayed frozen in place for a couple of seconds, breathing hard from my anxiousness and how quickly I'd had to move through the snow to catch up to Bella. I caught up to her again, my hand shooting out to grab her arm and make her stop. She looked up to me, her eyes dark and guarded.

"Bella, why'd you leave?"

"I didn't leave Edward," she said with a nervous laugh. "I started getting cold sitting on that bench so I got up and started walking."

"Look, I'm sorry. But I turned around to look for you and you weren't there anymore."

She shrugged. "It's no big deal Edward. I don't see why you're apologizing."

"Because," I said, my voice rising slightly. "Because," I repeated in a lower voice. I sighed. "Look, I don't know how much you heard of that conversation, but,-"

"It doesn't matter one way or the other," she said flatly, her eyes dark and unreadable.

"What do you mean it doesn't matter?" I said, the building frustration seeping into my voice.

It took her a few moments to answer. "I mean exactly what I said. It doesn't matter."

The growing feeling that something was wrong, that yet another thread had been pulled in the fabric intensified. "How could you say it doesn't matter?" I asked, the mounting confusion making my voice quake slightly. "Don't you want to know-"

"Does it matter to you?" she cut me off.

"What?"

"Does that conversation with Matthew and Peter's moms matter to you?"

I had to stop and think about what she was asking because at this point I was seriously fucking confused. "No! I mean- I'm just trying to explain to you-"

"Then if it doesn't matter to you, why are we standing here in the cold discussing it?"

I had no answer. I could only stare at her, wishing I knew what the hell was going through her mind.

"Let's get Maddie home," she said, seeing I wasn't going to speak. "It's getting colder and I still have to pack for Washington." Again, there was no hostility, no anger in her voice, nor in her expression. Only that blank smile, that smile that looked more and more like a dam holding something back. Something very big that was getting ready to burst.

I swallowed and nodded, unable to think of anything else to say.

We started walking in silence, the swishing sound of melting snow under our feet filling my ears.

A block from her building, Maddie - who'd been just as silent as us throughout our walk home -finally spoke.

"Edwood, I don't want to go to the Chwismas show with that lady."

"We don't have to go anywhere you don't want to Princess."

We walked on in silence, Bella's arms just a few inches from mine. But for some reason I felt as if she might as well have been across the country already.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews are almost as good as having Edward on your balcony in nothing more than his black Calvins.**

**Let me know what you're thinking. We'll get answers next chapter. Edward will be back again.**


	22. Chapter 21 The Fight

**A/N: Alright guys. We'll find out what's going on with Bella here. I know many of you are mad at her, but try to be understanding.**

**A couple of things. First, I'd like to remind you guys that the past couple of chapters have only spanned a time line of three days. Although Bella is acting strange, it's only been for three days! If – as some of you have suggested – Edward were to dump her now because of the way she's been acting for the past few days, then would he really be worth it?**

**Also, I want to let you all know that there will be another chapter posted later on this week again, and that while the name of this chapter is 'The Fight,' the name of the following chapter is 'The Make Up.' I think you'll all really like it!**

**Special thanks to my beta, Danna0724, for turning out these last three chapters so quickly. I know I've been a pain sweetie; thanks for not abandoning me. And also thanks for making me feel better about this chapter. I needed the encouragement.**

**All characters, except Maddie, belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

**Chapter 21 – The Fight**

Chapter Song Rec:

_I Knew I Loved You_ – Savage Garden

* * *

**EPOV**

"Edwood why come the three beuhs din't want to shauh with Gowdylocks? Mommy says you 'posed to shauh."

Maddie lay resting against her propped pillow on her small bed, tucked warmly under her blankets while I sat on her bedside, a big blue book of fairy tales on my lap. I'd just finished reading her tonight's feature, Goldilocks, which had been preceded by a round of Princess Monopoly before that. Needless to say, I was craving a good game of football.

I listened to the sounds coming from the bedroom across the hall, where Bella packed for her trip to Washington. The drawers opened and closed with more force than usual, the hangers banged against each other as they were pulled down insistently. The bathroom cabinet hinges complained as they were torn open angrily, bottles falling haphazardly and being shoved back in.

Since we'd gotten home from the riverfront, Bella spoke to me softly, evenly, without any outward sign of being upset. When she looked at me it was with a smile, that same maddening smile I'd gotten after she'd turned down the airline tickets, that same smile she'd given me out in my parents back yard the other night, under the stars, the same one she'd plastered on her face when I'd caught up to her after she'd walked off by herself by the riverfront. A smile that I was beginning to suspect was a dam she used to hold back whatever she was really thinking and feeling.

As much as I loved her, I was beginning to have a real problem with that smile.

But now with all the banging and the throwing going on in her bedroom, I had a feeling whatever the smile was hiding was beginning to seep through. She was losing the fight with herself, and as soon as I got Maddie in bed for the night, we were going to talk about what the hell was going on even if I had to tie her down to do it. She was leaving me in two days and I'd be damned if I let her leave with whatever was bothering her still between us. It was going to be hard enough being without her and Maddie, wondering what her father and Jake would be telling her once she told them about us.

I turned my thoughts back to the princess before me, waiting patiently for my answer.

God, I wished these fairy tales came with some sort of instruction manual. Obviously there was supposed to be a lesson in there somewhere; that was the point of all these stories. But how the hell was I supposed to know what it was?

"I guess…" I said slowly, measuring my words and thinking them through as I spoke, "the bears just didn't feel like it was fair that they went through the trouble of grilling the steaks 'til they were to their liking-,"

In my version of the story, the bears were each eating a twelve ounce porterhouse steak. I mean, what the fuck was porridge anyway, and who in their right mind would want to eat it, no matter how fucking hungry they were? And Goldilocks sounded like a picky little wench that wouldn't touch that shit with a ten foot pole.

"-and breaking in the chairs and beds until they were nice and comfy, and then along comes this girl out of nowhere, and just because she's got this full head of golden hair, she seems to think she can just walk into the place and act like she owns it."

Maddie was thoughtful for a moment.

"You mean like when Matthew messed up my pwetty snow angel today, aftuh I made it so pwetty?"

She was so freakin' smart this kid. I felt a swell of pride at how quickly she caught on.

"Exactly like that," I said, tapping her cherub nose with my forefinger.

She was thoughtful again, before a strange look settled on her small round face. She crossed her arms in front of her, bouncing them up and down once.

"Edwood, ah you _my_ Edwood?"

I chuckled, my brows furrowing quizzically. "What do you mean princess?"

"I mean do I have to shauh you?"

I wasn't sure what she was trying to ask. "What do you mean by share me?"

She exhaled loudly, her little forehead wrinkling in irritation at my inability to follow her.

"You said you're my best fwend," she began.

"Yeah…" I agreed curiously.

"And you're mommy's speshow fwend too."

I lifted an eyebrow, momentarily caught off guard. But Maddie was as bright as they came. Just because she hadn't said anything didn't mean she hadn't realized.

"Yes…" I agreed again, smiling as I wondered where she was going with this.

"Matthew and Petuh's mommies look at you like they want you to be _theuh_ speshow fwend, but _I_ only want you to be me and mommy's speshow fwend." She frowned, bouncing her crossed arms again. "Do we _have_ to shauh you?"

My mouth fell open for a couple of seconds, completely dumbfounded. How does a four-year old even see something like that? But then, hadn't I just been thinking how quickly she caught on to things? She was so perceptive; she'd been able to sit there and see exactly what was happening, even in her four-year old little way.

Bella needed to take some lessons from Maddie here; Number one: How to act when someone else is clearly trying to move in on your territory; and Number two, and even _more importantly_: How to clearly communicate what you're thinking and feeling. With all her speech impediments and mispronunciations, Maddie's message was loud and clear:

You are _mine_ and I don't want to share.

I reached out and gently stroked her long dark hair. Her frown and pouted lips didn't budge. I smiled.

"No princess. You and mommy don't have to share me with anyone else."

Finally, her frown disappeared; her mouth turned up in a huge grin.

"Yay!" she cried, lifting her arms over her head and bouncing on her bottom. "I don't have to shauh! I don't have to shauh! I don't have to shauh!"

I chuckled at her undisguised enthusiasm. If only Bella was as much of an open book as her daughter.

"Alright Maddie, time to get to sleep," I said gently.

She stopped bouncing, settling back into her pillow with a huge yawn, and looked up at me with those big brown eyes I loved, so trusting and open and innocent.

"Edwood, can you sing me a wollabuy?"

I cocked my head to the side. "A what?"

"A wollabuy. A night night song, like mommy does sometimes."

I nodded my head slowly in understanding. "I don't know any lullabies princess. I'm sorry."

Her baby browns clouded over with disappointment, the edges of her mouth twitching downwards.

"But," I said quickly, "I do know another song you might like that's nice and quiet. Want to hear it?"

Her dark eyes sparkled with anticipation, the edges of her mouth twitching up now.

I had no idea where the song came from. I hadn't even been aware until that moment that I'd known it. All I knew then was that it was the best way to express to her what she meant to me. She'd just told me I was _her_ Edward. Well, it was my turn.

Clearing my throat and gazing down at her tucked comfortably into her little bed, I started quietly.

"_Maybe it's intuition.  
__But some things you just don't question.  
__Like in your eyes I see my future in an instant.  
__And there it goes.  
__I think I found my best friend.  
__I know that it might sound more than a little crazy but I believe  
__I knew I loved you before I met you.  
__I think I dreamed you into life.  
__I knew I loved you before I met you.  
__I have been waiting all my life."_

Her smile widened. She gazed at me through tired, half-lidded eyes; fighting to keep them open.

"_There's just no rhyme or reason  
__Only this sense of completion.  
__And in your eyes I see the missing pieces  
__I'm searching for.  
__I think I've found my way home."_

Her smile grew softer; her lids grew heavier and heavier.

"_I know that it might sound more than a little crazy but I believe  
__I knew I loved you before I met you.  
__I think I dreamed you into life.  
__I knew I loved you before I met you.  
__I have been waiting all my life."_

With just a hint of a smile still on her face, her eyes practically closed, she sighed heavily.

"I love you Edwood," she murmured quietly.

They say there are certain moments in your life you'll never forget.

I'll never forget the time I was ten and hit the winning home run for my little league team; the look on my father's face, the taste of the huge triple chocolate brownie cone he bought me on my tongue. The first girl I kissed, Sienna Something-or-other, her chapped lips scraping against mine as we both fumbled nervously. The first time I had sex, Monica Stevens, in her peach colored bedroom one night when her parents were out at a fundraiser during junior year of high school. The first time I led the Dartmouth Soccer Team to championship victory.

All those moments paled in comparison to this one. There were no words to describe it; nothing to compare it to.

I drew in a deep, shaky breath and let it out slowly.

"I love you too Princess Madisen. My little girl."

With her eyes completely closed now, she fell into deep sleep, the smile still on her beautiful little face.

I sat there quietly, gazing down at her perfect caramel face completely relaxed in sleep, wondering how one little being could own me so completely.

Maddie sighed deeply a couple of times and puckered her little lips, a steady stream of breath moving in and out slowly. After a few minutes I got up, being careful not to juggle the bed too much, and leaned over to place a soft kiss on her forehead. I turned off her pink bedside lamp and when I turned to leave I was startled by the sight of Bella, standing by the door, leaning into the frame. I had no idea how long she'd been standing there.

The light streaming in from the hallway framed her in a luminescent glow, illuminating her long, dark hair; the light bouncing off of her dark eyes, eyes that were glassy and glistening as she watched me. Her expression was a strange mixture of awe and distress, as if she'd just witnessed something that both fascinated and scared the bejeezus out of her all at once.

What the hell was going on with her?

In two long strides I was at her side, my hands cupping her face gently.

"Bella what is it? What's going on?"

She shook her head and smiled; that god-damned smile again.

"I just have a bit of a headache."

I pursed my lips doubtfully.

"A headache?" I asked through raised eyebrows.

She nodded.

"Do you get those often?"

"No, not very often. I think I'll just take a warm shower, see if that helps it a bit."

"Do you want me to head out early?"

"Do you want to head out early?"

Jesus Bella, give me one straight answer here.

"Do. _You_. Want me. To head out early?"

"Not unless you want to."

I sighed impatiently. "No. I don't want to leave."

"Then don't."

I drew in a deep breath, watching her. Her expression was blank again, her eyes shifting around, never settling on me for more than a couple of seconds.

"I brought my tool box with me tonight. Since your building super seems to be good-for-nothing, I'll take a look at the kitchen sink while you're in the shower."

Bella's kitchen sink had been clogging for the past few days. She'd left a message for the building manager but he hadn't returned it yet.

"You don't have to do that Edward," she said, turning and heading towards the bathroom.

I sighed, watching her retreating form. "I know I don't have to, but maybe I want to. Maybe I don't want you and Maddie to deal with a clogged drain."

I heard the irritation in my voice, but I couldn't help it. Bella paused in her steps, obviously catching my tone too, but after a couple of seconds, she continued on her way. She closed the door behind her a little more forcefully than necessary.

_Fuck_, I mumbled under my breath, running my hand through my hair. Something was not right. Part of me couldn't help thinking maybe it _would_ be a good idea for me to go home early. But I knew if I did, this shit would just keep growing and growing.

Fine. I'd let her take her shower and _then_ we'd talk.

As I walked to the table by the door where I'd left my toolbox, I heard the shower running and took a deep breath, picturing Bella readying herself for her bath, the steam from the hot shower swirling all around her as she pulled off her shirt, letting it fall to the floor. With heavy footsteps I walked blindly towards the kitchen, imagining how next, she'd slowly pull the zipper down on her jeans, shimmying her hips from side to side to loosen them, and then those would fall to the floor unceremoniously too as she picked up one soft, creamy leg and then the other to step out of them. As I dropped to the floor, opening the cabinets under the sink, I realized that right about now, Bella was probably standing in the middle of the bathroom in nothing but her bra and panties. I groaned quietly to myself, feeling my heart beat speed up, as I pictured the next step in the showering process.

I tried to distract myself with what I was trying to do. I had to remove the elbow pipe under the sink. Bella had already tried cleaning it out with baking powder and vinegar. That hadn't worked, so the pipe needed to be removed and cleaned out. Unfortunately, plumbing had never been my strong point. I was going to need some help.

"What's up bro?" Emmett answered cheerfully on the third ring. I focused on the sound of his big, loud voice and tried not to focus on the images in my mind of Bella lathering herself up in the shower only a few feet away from me.

"I need your help Em. Bella's pipe's clogged and I need to clean it out."

Five seconds of silence were followed by the loudest burst of laughter I'd ever heard, before what I'd said dawned on me.

"You're such an ass," I growled.

"I- I- I-" he choked on his laughter, "I- You're- You're the one- You're the one who called me for help cleaning Bella's pipe!"

"Her kitchen sink is clogged! I need to remove the pipe and clean it out!" I snapped, in no mood for his humor.

He kept laughing for a couple more minutes, repeating what I'd said over and over while I rolled my eyes and waited, annoyed and breathing hard into the phone. Finally, his laughter died down and he took a deep breath to compose himself.

"You good? Got it out your system?"

"I think so," he chortled.

"Good. Can we fucking get on with it now?"

He snickered once more. "Sure. Now tell me what you're looking at."

He talked me through the rest of the process, loosening the nuts on the P trap to disconnect it, pulling it down and out.

"Now make sure you have a bucket-"

"Ahh fuck, I just got water all over me!"

"You dope! Didn't you have a bucket under it to catch the water that would drain out?"

"No I didn't have a bucket under it to catch the water that would drain out!" I mimicked. "Did you tell me to have a bucket under it to catch the water?"

He snickered again. "Boy, sounds like somebody's got his panties in a bunch tonight!"

"Whatever," I mumbled.

Emmett laughed. "Alright, now, you got yourself a snake in that handy little tool box of yours?"

I poked my head out from under the kitchen sink and rummaged through the toolbox until the long coiled item caught my eye.

"Got it," I mumbled again.

"Good. Now pay attention 'cause this here might be your only chance to get your snake into Bella's pipe," he laughed again.

I groaned. "Look, just get on with it okay?"

"You okay tonight?" he asked, some genuine concern leaking through his continued chortles.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. What do I do next?"

He was silent for two seconds. "Okay," he breathed loudly. "Well, just stick that snake deep in that pipe and plunge it in and out, in and out until you've got it nice and clean and smooth-"

"Emmett," I groaned.

"Hey, I'm just telling you how it's done," he chuckled. "Not my fault if your mind is somewhere else."

"Fine, whatever," I breathed, and did as I was told.

"Come on Edward. Tell your big brother. What's got you all hot and bothered tonight? 'Cause I know it's not nothing. Something's got you upset."

"What makes you think I'm upset?" I answered, cleaning out the pipe.

"Well, you just don't have that 'my life is sunshine and roses' voice that's become the norm for you lately."

I smirked, but didn't answer.

"Come on Ed, what is it? You and Bella have your first big fight?"

I snorted. "I wish," I mumbled almost under my breath while cleaning the gook from the pipe onto an old kitchen towel.

"You wish?" Emmett chuckled. "Is that what you just said?"

I sighed again. "It's just…" - I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly – "We were at the park earlier tonight, and there were these women there-"

"Don't tell me you started flirting with them?" he said in a reproving tone.

"Jesus Christ do I really look like that much of an asshole? Of course not! I wouldn't do that!"

"Alright, alright, sorry!" Emmett backtracked. "Go on then."

I exhaled loudly. "Long story short, they sort of started flirting with me-"

"Aah. I see. And Bella got pissed off right?"

"No, not right! She walked away when I tried to introduce her as my girlfriend, and then she acted as if everything was fine and dandy when I caught up to her!"

Emmett was silent.

"So what do you think?" I finally asked, bringing the pipe up to my eye to make sure it was all cleaned out.

"What do I think about what?"

"About what I just told you?"

"I'm still waiting to hear what the problem is."

I huffed impatiently, putting the pipe down. "I just told you."

He was quiet again for a while. "So you're upset because your girlfriend didn't give you shit about two girls that were coming on to you? Were they hot?"

"Who?"

"The women making a play for you. Were they hot?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I guess, technically. I dated one of them once. You remember Kate? Tall blonde?"

"They were usually tall blondes with you."

I smirked. "She was a Rockette."

"Aaah," Emmett cried enthusiastically. "Kate the Rockette! Fuck yeah I remember Kate the Rockette," he chuckled.

I shook my head. "Look, it's not just that. Yesterday we were at my place and Tanya called and I got into a loud argument with her. And then when I tried to talk to Bella about it she said it wasn't necessary and refused to discuss it. Ask Rose. She was there."

"Yeah, Rosie mentioned it," he chuckled. "Look," he said, his voice amused, "Is that what you're pissed off about? Because Bella is apparently confident enough in herself that she doesn't need to throw a hissy fit every time another woman looks your way? Boy little brother, I think the lack of sex is really starting to mess with your brain. Let me remind you of something your sexually deprived mind seems to have forgotten. You do not get upset when your girlfriend doesn't bitch and moan about other chicks calling you or coming on to you. You thank your lucky stars and call it a day. And a good one at that. My Rosie would never go for that shit. Not that she's not self-confident, but nobody better even think of sampling her goods, know what I mean?"

I realized how stupid I was sounding. "Look, it's not just that. The other day-"

Just then, the call waiting beeped.

"Hold on, there's another call," I said, pulling the phone away from my ear to see who it was.

**Black, Jacob – Forks, Washington**

I closed my eyes and groaned.

"Fuuuck," I hissed through my teeth.

"Who is it?" Emmett asked.

I had to take a few deep breaths before I could answer. "Bella's friend from Washington," I said in a voice shaking with anger.

"A guy friend?" Emmett guessed.

"Yeah." The call waiting kept beeping.

"You gonna get it?"

I shook my head. "No." The call waiting finally stopped.

"Oh. _Ohhh_," he repeated, as if suddenly understanding something. "Well, you know. She doesn't get mad about girls calling you, so you can't really say shit about guys calling her."

"That's fucking different," I growled. I didn't _want_ any girls calling me.

We were both silent for a few moments. "You're gonna try n' tell me you wouldn't be pissed?" I challenged.

"No, I'd definitely be pissed," Emmett admitted, "but like I said, Rosie wouldn't go for chicks calling me either. So it's a non-issue for us.

Just then, the call waiting started again. I pulled the phone away again to check the caller ID, although I already knew what it would say.

**Black, Jacob – Forks, Washington**

"Holy Hell," I muttered furiously.

"Him again?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah." For a second I distracted myself from my fury by thinking it would be a good idea to introduce Jake to Tanya. Apparently they both had the same phone stalker tendencies.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you man"- Emmett said, while the call waiting beeped insistently - "but you're a better man than me. I would've answered that shit already and told that guy where to go."

The beeping finally ended, and I drew in a long breath, loosening my grip on the phone. I hadn't realized how tightly I'd been holding it, as if it were Jake's neck. I was about to say something to Emmett, when the bathroom door opened and my eyes immediately traveled up from under the sink.

Bella walked out of the bathroom, her wet hair brushed back away from her face, her cheeks a bright pink from the hot water. She wore a white, knee-length terry robe tied loosely in the front, and as she took a few hesitant steps in my direction, the robe swayed softly with her, her upper thighs peeking out from underneath, and the front slit of the robe exposing the white skin between her breasts. She came to a stop a few short inches from me.

"Gotta go," I murmured into the phone before blindly hitting the 'end' button.

With the pipe in one hand and her phone in the other, I stood up awkwardly to face her, unable to keep myself from openly ogling.

Jesus Lord Almighty. Bella was standing less than an arm's length away from me in nothing more than a robe. A loose robe. A loose robe that needed nothing more than a pull on the belt to completely loosen it off of her.

I gulped thickly.

Bella's eyes – nervous and guarded – went to the items in my hands.

"Uhm, I- I was…" - I swallowed again, trying desperately to hold on to a train of thought that didn't involve ripping that robe off of her – "I wanted to unclog the drain but Emmett's better at plumbing than I am, so I figured I'd give him a call…"

She nodded slowly, biting her lip. "I'm sure you're just as good at that as you are at everything else," she said in a low voice, keeping her eyes down.

I tried uselessly to answer her without staring at the smooth, milky skin peeking out between her robe, at the way her chest rose and fell underneath. I lowered my eyes but that just brought them in contact with the sliver of thigh still showing through.

"Yeah, well, plumbing's never been my favorite job, and I wanted to make sure I did you right." My eyes widened in horror at the realization of what I'd said, and I brought them up to meet hers. She bit her lip furiously, frowning.

"I mean, did _it_ right! Did _it_ right. _It_," I corrected myself quickly. "I wanted to do _it_ right."

She nodded again, still gnawing on her lip. She looked at me anxiously. "Do you need any…" – she swallowed – "thing from me?"

I forced myself to keep my eyes on hers, ignoring their desperate plea to wander further south. "No. I think I'm done actually." I glanced towards the kitchen rag I'd thrown in the sink. "I owe you a new kitchen towel though," I said, trying to keep my voice casual and even, "I stained it when I used my snake to clear your pipe."

I closed my eyes, replaying my last words in my mind. "I mean _the_ snake to clear _the_ pipe! Damn it! _The_ snake to clear _the_ pipe. _The_ pipe."

I was gonna fucking kill Emmett next time I saw him for planting that shit in my head.

Her frown deepened and she cocked her head to the side, searching my eyes as if she were trying to figure something out. Neither one of us spoke for what felt like an eternity, our eyes locked on each other. She stared at me as if she were waiting for me to say something else while I struggled desperately not to let my eyes wander too much or to jump her right then and there.

I'd never in my life imagined a terry robe could be so god-damned sexy. The way it followed her perfect curves, the way it tempted me with just a hint of what lay underneath, the way her breasts remained so perky although I knew there was nothing holding them underneath, as evidenced by the small, round bumps protruding through the white material.

"Are you cold?" The words just popped out of my mouth, the first thing I thought of at the sight of the little round bumps sticking up under the robe. Well, the second thing. "It's kind of cold in here tonight."

Something in Bella's expression changed. The anxiety I thought I'd seen in them morphed into irritation. Her frown grew more pronounced. She stopped biting on her lip and glared at me through cool, exasperated eyes.

She pursed her lips. "Yeah, actually, I am kind of cold. I guess I should go put on some warm flannel pajamas, huh?"

And while what I really wanted to say was 'No, for the love of all that's holy, please don't! Please let me take that robe off of you and spend the rest of the night making love to you,' what I said was,

"Okay. I'll get this pipe back in then. Let me just adjust my nuts- Jesus Christ, _the_ nuts! Let me adjust _the_ nuts on the sink's pipe and get it back in!"

She narrowed her eyes at me, and without another word stalked towards her room.

"How's your headache?" I called out.

"Fine!" she snapped, before closing the door behind her forcefully.

I flinched slightly at the sound of the door, shaking my head quickly from side to side to clear it from the hypnotic spell Bella in a terry robe had placed on it. Jesus Christ, the woman was trying to kill me. I was sure of it now.

With a mind in complete turmoil and a raging hard-on the likes of which I'd never experienced before, I forced myself back under the kitchen sink, refitted the pipe underneath, adjusted the goddamn nuts and re-screwed them in. All the while wondering what the hell was going on in this apartment tonight.

Once I was done, I moved out from under the sink and slammed the cabinets shut, waiting for Bella to come out so we could talk once and for all and clear the air. Unless she came out in that robe again. Because if she did, Jesus Christ I wouldn't be responsible for my actions.

I picked the phone up off the floor and went to hang it up, but before I could place it on its base, it rang again. Warily, my eyes took in the screen for the Caller ID.

**Black, Jacob – Forks, Washington**.

At that same moment, Bella stepped out of her bedroom, the other phone in her hand and wearing a nice comfy sweat suit.

Our eyes met, hers widening in horror at the sight of the phone in my hand, mine narrowed in single-minded determination.

I pressed down on the 'TALK' button and brought the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

Two seconds of silence. "Uh, sorry. I think I…"- Confused hesitation – "I must have the wrong number."

"Who are you looking for?" I asked quickly.

"Hang up Edward!" Bella hissed anxiously in front of me, dropping the other phone on the counter.

My eyes intently on hers, I listened for Jake's answer.

"I'm looking for…I'm looking for Bella Swan, but I think I dialed the wrong-"

"Edward hang up!" she hissed again.

I shook my head.

"You don't have the wrong number."

Bella closed her eyes tightly and cursed, bringing her hands up to her wet hair and running her fingers through her scalp.

This time, the silence on the other line lasted much longer. I was beginning to think Jake might've hung up when his voice came on the line again, rough and anxious.

"Who is this?"

"This is Edward Cullen."

"Edward!" Bella yelled in a whisper.

"Edward Cullen? Edward Cullen, Bella's boss?" he asked in a bewildered tone.

"No," I answered tersely, speaking my next words clearly and concisely.

"Edward Cullen, Bella's boyfriend."

"Oh God," Bella moaned, closing her eyes again.

Jake didn't speak for several seconds, but there was no longer silence on the line. I could hear his rough, heavy breathing, his anxious movements as his mind processed what I'd just said.

"Is this some sort of god-damned joke?" he finally hissed in a strained voice.

"No."

He sucked in a deep breath before a string of expletives a mile long began spewing from his mouth.

"Where's Bella?" he yelled, no longer attempting to control himself. "Put Bella on!"

I shook my head. "I'm not putting anyone on until you calm the hell down and clean up that fucking language," I said in a steady voice. Yeah, I saw the contradiction in what I'd just said, but I couldn't give a fuck at the moment.

"Put her the fuck on now!"

I snorted and pulled the phone away from my ear, ready to hang up. Bella grabbed my wrist.

"Give me the phone Edward."

"No."

We glared at each other. I could hear Jake screaming at the top of his lungs over the phone.

Her nostrils flared. "Give me the phone _now_."

With my own nostrils flaring, my jaw locked tight, I put the phone to my ear.

"You watch your god-damned mouth when you speak to her," I hissed. With our eyes locked in battle, I handed the phone to Bella. She took it from me and brought it to her ear, keeping her eyes on me. I stood in front of her, my arms crossed tightly. I wasn't even going to pretend not to listen.

She closed her eyes once quickly before speaking. "Jake," she said in a wary tone, but Jake was screaming so loudly he made it pretty easy for me to hear.

'_What the hell Bella? What the hell is going on over there?'_

"Jake, I was going to tell you-"

'_Is it true? Is he your boyfriend? Is he your boyfriend?_' he repeated even more loudly when Bella failed to answer right away.

I waited with baited breath for her answer, because I swear to God, as much as I loved her, if she denied it, I didn't know what I'd do. What kind of pussy sticks around when his girlfriend denies his existence to another guy?

"Yes Jake. It's true."

I breathed out a huge sigh of relief.

Jacob was silent again for a while.

'_Edward Cullen?'_ he spat forcefully when he finally spoke. '_Edward fucking Cullen? Jesus Christ Bells are you out of your- He's your boss, isn't he? The guy from the magazine covers, always with a different girl? _I gritted my teeth. '_What is it they call him? The rich player boy or some shit like that?'_

I closed my eyes, shaking my head and counting backwards in my mind to keep from imploding.

Bella's voice was hesitant, shaky when she responded. "That's not him."

'_He's not your boss?'_

"He is…" – she drew in a shaky breath – "He is my…boss, technically. But he's not the guy those magazines make him out to be. He's not like that."

Again Jake went silent. For a split second I actually hoped he'd just given up, finally seen the impossibility of his feelings, the error of his ways and all that shit. No such luck.

He started laughing. Like a maniac. Like a mocking maniac.

'_Jesus Bells, do you hear yourself?'_ he laughed. '_Do you fucking hear __**yourself?'**_

Fucking guy needed his mouth washed out with a bar of soap. Or my fist.

"_He's not like that," _he mimicked her through his snickers. Then the laughter died down, replaced by a gruff, angry voice. _'Let me give you some news Bells. He is exactly like that! Just like Paul was like that! Jesus Bella, is that your __**type**__? I can't believe you fell for that shit…__**again!**__'_

If I ever got my hands on Jacob Black, I was going to put that mother fucker in a headlock so tight he'd shit himself before he passed out. I put my hand out for the phone. Bella ignored me.

"I'm not falling for anything again Jacob," she growled in a low voice, closing her eyes. "I'm not," she repeated quietly, as if she were trying to convince herself as much as him.

'_I thought you said you learned your lesson? Huh? Weren't you the one who said last time you were here that Trusting Bella was gone?'_

"Jacob, you don't understand," she breathed through gritted teeth. She opened her eyes again, bringing them up to me.

'_Then make me understand! Make me understand, god damn it, because you're right Bells, I don't! You said you weren't looking for anyone over there! You said-'_

"I know what I said!" she spat back.

'_You are so naïve Bella!'_ he yelled. _'Paul breaking your heart, practically __**destroying**__ you wasn't enough? You had to go looking for an even bigger asshole now to finish the job? What about Maddie? Don't you think about your daughter?'_

"Of course I think about my daughter!" Bella yelled back. "You have no right-"

'Have you told Charlie?'

Bella hesitated. "No."

'_No! Of course not! 'Cause you know what he'd say. Same thing I'm telling you! It's Paul all over again, 'cept this time's even worse 'cause Maddie's gonna end up hurt too!'_

Bella's face contorted in pain.

I'd had enough of this shit.

"Give me the phone Bella." I stretched my arm out. She looked at me sharply and ignored me.

Jake said something else, but in a lower voice, too low for me to hear. Whatever it was though made Bella look away from me abruptly and turn to the phone with a deep frown.

"What? No! This is ridiculous Jake! No!"

"Give me the phone Bella."

She kept ignoring me.

'_Then tell him it's over! Tell him you quit that bullshit job and it's over and you're leaving that god damned city and coming home to me and your dad!'_

"No Jake. Stop-"

"Bella give me the phone."

'_Tell him it's over Bella and you're coming home for good!'_

"Give me the phone Bella."

"Edward please-"

'_Tell him it's over Bells!'_

"Bella-"

"No!" Bella suddenly yelled, answering both of us. I jerked back. She looked up at me, glowering, but spoke her next words into the phone.

"Jake, I'm coming home at the end of the week for Thanksgiving. I hope you and I can talk like rational adults then, but don't expect me to explain myself to you, because I really don't need to do that."

He said something else I couldn't hear.

"I expect you to be my _friend_," she pleaded, in response to whatever he'd just said, "the way you promised you'd always be."

Again, he said something unintelligible.

"Well if I am, then it's mine to make," she said, irritation seeping back into her voice.

The last thing he said made her eyes close again, her hand curling around the phone so tightly I could see the strain on her knuckles.

"Jake, don't. Please. Don't."

Slowly, she lifted her free hand to her scalp, fisting her hair tightly before moving the phone away from her ear, staring at it for a few seconds before pressing down on the 'End' button.

We stood there for a mighty long fucking time, neither one of us saying a word. In the background, the dull noises from the TV droned on insistently. Voices and sounds from the street echoed loudly in the silence surrounding us. Everything sounded louder, more intensified in the stillness that surrounded us in Bella's small kitchen. I started ticking the seconds away to the tune of Bella's rhythmic breathing, one Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi, four Mississippi, five-

"I…" – she drew in a deep breath – "I don't even know what to say to you right now." She brought her eyes up to me; her chocolate irises clouded with frustration.

"Look," I said in an even voice, "I'm really sorry if Jacob took it badly, but it was time he knew."

She glared at me in total disbelief. "You're sorry? Really? Because sorry is the last thing you look right now."

I sighed. "Well sorry he took it badly is the best I can do right now Bella, unless you want me to lie and tell you I'm sorry I told him."

She snorted and shook her head. "Do you have any idea what you've done? Do you even realize-" – she looked up at the ceiling, her expression tense – "Jake's probably on the phone to my dad right now, telling him everything," she murmured more to herself than me. She snorted again. "That is, unless he's on his way to the airport."

I felt myself tense up; the anger I was trying so fucking badly to reign in taking hold inside.

"That's fine by me. I've got a few things I'd like to clear up with him face to face anyway." As well as a fist to stick in his dirty god-damned mouth.

She smiled wryly. "Really? Is that what this was all about? You proving something?"

"The only thing this was about Bella is my not wanting to be your dirty little secret anymore."

"What?" she snorted.

I took a step closer to her. She took a step back, bringing her back up against the kitchen counter. "If you and I are going to do this Bella," – I spoke through a clenched jaw, waving a hand tightly between us – "then we need to _really_ do this. Not just behind closed doors, or when no one's watching or listening."

"What are you talking about? Plenty of people know about us!"

"My family!" I hissed loudly. Her eyes widened in surprise at my tone but her expression told me I'd better calm the fuck down if I didn't want her knee in my crotch. I took a deep breath.

"My family," I repeated in a more subdued voice. "My family knows about us. That's it."

"That's not true." She shook her head vehemently. "Not only your family. Sue knows, and Maddie, and Eli-"

I closed my eyes and shook my head from side to side. "A four-year old little girl, the babysitter and the doorman." I sighed deeply. "Bella, it's not…it's not the number of people that know or who they are, it's who they _aren't_."

She looked at me as if she had no idea what I was saying.

"I know how important Jake and your dad are to you. And I can't help thinking that…you didn't _want_ to tell them. Not just for the time being, but…at all."

"I told you I'd tell them when I went home-"

"I know!" I interrupted her. She glared at me, pursing her lips. "I know," I said, bringing it down a notch again. "Bella, I couldn't take it anymore," I finally admitted. "I just feel like you don't want to move ahead, like you don't want to go public-"

"I don't live a public life Edward! I told you that!" Now it was my turn to be surprised by her tone.

She breathed in, letting it out slowly. "Edward, I told you from the very beginning. My life is not what you're used to. I don't party, I don't smile for the camera. I like my privacy. I _like_ being anonymous. If you can't accept that, if you've had enough of the quiet life-"

"I _can_ accept that. Have I complained? Have I given you any indication in the past few weeks that I want anything other than that?"

"You're doing it now!"

"No, I'm not! You're twisting my words! All I'm saying is I want to be able to tell Jake, and James and every other asshole that wants you that You. Are. _Mine!_"

She glared at me.

I took another calming breath.

"Is this because of the pizza?" she asked incredulously. "Are you mad because James bought me a slice of pizza?"

"I don't give a damn that James bought you a slice of pizza. What kills me is the way you reacted to that pizza. You showed more freakin' enthusiasm for that cold slice than you did for the airline tickets I tried to give you! And you accepted it with a hell of a lot more emotion than you gave me when I tried to give you-"

"There's a big difference between a slice of pizza and two freakin' first-class tickets to Seattle!"

"Yes, I know! So why couldn't you accept my gift as graciously as you accepted his?"

"Because I am not first class material Edward! I never have been and I never will be!"

"I don't know what that means. All I know is that I don't think it's too much to ask you to treat me with the same importance and respect I give you."

"When haven't I treated you with importance or respect Edward?" she cried in disbelief.

"Every time I've got to watch James make a play for you and I can't do or say a damn thing about it!"

She pursed her lips together but didn't respond.

"You know what? Forget James, I don't care about James," I said. "He's an inconsequential little maggot as far as I'm concerned. You want to know what really kills me? It's _every single time_ Jake calls and I have to sit here and take it quietly, knowing he's practically salivating at the mouth over_ my girlfriend_-" – I knocked against my chest with my fisted hand, leaning into her – "Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? What an invisible asshole that makes me feel like? All I wanted was for him to be told. I don't understand why it was so difficult for you to do it over the phone."

"Because Jake is my oldest friend!"

I grabbed my head in exasperation. "Jake just wants to get into your pants!"

She jerked her head back in shock, her breathing hard and erratic.

"I'm sorry Bella. I shouldn't have said that." I ran my hands through my hair.

"No, you shouldn't have," she replied stoically.

"It's just that, it doesn't seem to phase you when another woman looks at me, but I can't stand-"

"Oh, so _that's_ what this was then," she nodded, as if she'd figured something out. "A lesson on how to properly make a fool of myself."

"Make a fool of yourself? Who's asking you to make a fool of yourself? All I'm saying is it would be nice to know you gave a damn Bella. When Tanya called me the other day, Rosalie seemed more bothered by it than you did. And a little four-year old girl showed more emotion than you did when Kate's friend…"

Bella stared at me as if I'd lost my mind. And for a second I thought maybe I had. Was I really standing here giving her shit because she hadn't given me _enough _shit about those other witches? Hadn't Emmett told me to just shut the fuck up and be grateful?

Except that I _knew_ there was more to it than that. There was something else going on here, and the fact that Bella didn't seem to care less was just the tip of it.

Bella closed her eyes momentarily and when she reopened them, her eyes were burning. Something in her expression had changed, hardened. She gripped on to the kitchen counter behind her.

"What was I supposed to say when Tanya called you?" she hissed. "Should I have pulled an Edward and answered the phone, made my presence known and demanded she not call you again? Should I have told her you were _my_ boyfriend now and asked her to stay the hell away from you? That's a fine stunt for you to pull Edward. No one's going to laugh at you for it. But you see the reaction Jake just had when he found out about you and me? That's the same reaction everyone's going to have. Total freakin' disbelief. Did you hear the way he laughed? _Everyone's_ going to laugh."

"What? No! Why-"

"Yes Edward!" she insisted, moving in closer, her brown eyes blazing. "You wanted me to tell Tanya to fuck off? For what? So she could have a good laugh at me a few weeks from now when it's _you_ calling her?"

I reeled back as if she'd physically slapped me. At first, I wasn't sure I'd heard her correctly.

"And how about when the blonde with the big tits and never-ending legs was making a play for you? What should I have done then? Stalked over to you and staked my claim so that when this is all over" – she stretched her arms out wide – "everyone could have a good chuckle in my name? Is that why you're so god-damned gung ho on announcing this to everyone? So that when you finally get tired of playing house with Maddie and me I can be a joke not just to everyone in this city, but to every subscription-toting member of People magazine in America? Everyone who'll be wondering what the hell you were doing with me in the first place? You think _you_ look like an asshole?" she screeched. "Who's going to _be_ the asshole when all this ends?"

For a split second, I seriously felt like shaking her. Shaking her until she stopped talking so much nonsense. But she'd started sobbing in the middle of her insane speech, and I realized with a deep sense of dread that she wasn't trying to kill me with her words; she _seriously fucking believed_ what she was saying. As it was, all I could do for those first few moments was just stare at her with my mouth hanging open, completely speechless and dumbfounded.

"I…I can't even believe you just said that," I finally managed to murmur, still in shock. "Please Bella. Please tell me you don't really believe that."

"What am I supposed to believe?" she said, tears streaming down her face. "I'm _not _going to make a fool of myself Edward by staking some non-existent claim to you. I played that part once and it didn't end well. So if you want to call Tanya go right on ahead, help yourself," – she waved towards the phone – "If you want take your Rockette friends up on their offer to kick their legs open, or up, or sideways or whatever direction for you, I won't try to stop you Edward. Just do me a favor and let me go first. I can't be the last one to know again."

"Again?" I asked, feeling as if a sharp knife had suddenly been dug deep in me, the pain ripping through and radiating from the base of my throat and throughout my entire chest. With a sudden clarity, as if a foggy window had just been opened, it all made sense. Her unexplained silences, all the times she'd look away from me, every unexplained word, every unexplained action, all her hesitancies.

She expected this to end. She _expected_ me to fuck up.

I cringed in pain.

But she wasn't done. The dam had broken and the river was flowing far and wide.

"And please don't think you need to be with me to see Maddie. I know you love her Edward, and she loves you, and I won't take you away from her. You don't need to make believe-"

"Make believe?" I interrupted, unable to listen to what she was saying anymore.

"You think I'm making believe with you? Do you really think I'm that good an actor?" I asked, my voice shaking in utter disbelief. I raised my hands to place them on her, to cradle her face between my hands but she put her hands up, palms out, holding me at bay. She started crying harder and I felt as if my heart was being squeezed painfully from the inside.

"Oh God Bella, please don't. Bella," I tried to put my arms around her, but she cringed away from me, covering her face with her hands.

"Bella I thought you knew," I pleaded. "I thought…I thought after all the time we've shared together in the past few weeks…I thought I'd made it clear-"

"I'm not blind Edward," she cried, refusing to look at me, or to listen to what I was trying to say. "I see the difference between me and the kinds of girls you go for. What I _don't_ see is why you're even here now. Why are you here with us when you can be-"

"Because I love _you_ damn it!" I yelled, unable to take it any longer.

Bella gasped, uncovering her face. Her eyes opened wide in shock. And then suddenly she was covering her face again and crying harder than ever. She lowered her head as she sobbed on and on, shielding herself from me with her hands and her long curtain of hair.

"I'm here because I love you, both Maddie _and_ you," I repeated, trying to stay calm when all I wanted to do was take her in my arms and hold her so tightly to me I might crush her. Hold her until she understood how much she and Maddie meant to me. And kiss her. And make love to her. And damn it just keep her in my arms forever.

"I'm sorry Bella. But I thought you knew. I thought you'd figured it out by now. But it's my fault, because I should've told you. I should've said it. I wanted to, I swear I did, but the time never seemed just right. But I should've told you the second I figured it out. It was that first night I held you in your bed. I'd never felt what I felt then, so at peace, so…redeemed. And I knew I loved you." She kept crying. "But you want to know the absolute truth? I've loved you since the moment I saw you outside that conference room, but I don't think you would've believed me if I'd said it then."

Her sobs slowed down and she hesitantly removed her hands from her face. Her cheeks were streaked with tears, her eyes puffy and red. And I'd never loved her more.

"I love you Bella," I repeated softly. "Please believe me. I know you're scared. I'm scared too. I've never given my heart to anyone but it's yours now Bella. It's all yours. You say you're not going to make a fool of yourself by staking a claim to me? You _own_ me Bella. You and the little girl sleeping in there," I pointed towards Maddie's bedroom, "you both own me completely."

Her eyes searched mine, and I could finally see everything she'd been holding back these past few days, these past few weeks. The terror, the doubt.

"For now Edward. But how about when you finally realize what you'd have to give up to be with me? I _can't _be like all those other girls Edward, even if I tried. I can't give you the kind of life you're used to. I can't drop everything at a moment's notice to go away with you. I don't know how to act in front of the paparazzi. I don't have the right look. I don't know how to smile properly, or even scowl properly. I don't fly first class, I don't look like them, I can't act like them. I'm completely different-"

"Bella, I don't love you despite you being different, I love you because of it! I don't love you despite the changes you and Maddie have brought to my life, I love you because of them!"

"I don't know if I can be enough Edward! I wasn't enough before," she said, looking down with a resigned voice.

"When weren't you enough?" I asked, before it dawned on me, she wasn't talking about us.

"Bella, I know I haven't been an angel all my life, but these past couple of months I've done my best to be a good man for you and Maddie. A man worthy of the both of you. But I can't pay for mistakes that weren't mine. I would if I could Bella. For you, I'd do it if it meant getting you to trust me. But I can't undo what he did." I looked deep in her eyes. "I. Am. Not. Paul. Forrester."

"I know that!" she cried, her tears starting again. "You think I don't know that? You think I don't see the difference between you and him? How much _more_ you are? And if I wasn't enough for _him_, how could I ever be enough for _you_?"

"Bella, I-" – I ran my hand down my face and exhaled – "I can't tell you why he did what he did. I seriously have no god-damned idea. All I can do is tell you again that I'm not him. I'm not the one who stepped out on you, and I never will be. And if you and I are going to make this work, you have to believe that."

Something suddenly dawned on me.

"Were you ever going to tell them Bella?" I asked softly.

She stopped crying for a second and looked up at me. "What?"

"Were you ever going to tell Jacob and your father about us?"

"Of course," she cried indignantly, but abruptly, something changed in her eyes. She frowned, as if suddenly taken by surprise by something she hadn't even realized herself.

I closed my eyes, shaking my head. Why announce something you weren't expecting to last in the first place?

Slowly, I raised my hands to her shoulders, gripping her. She looked up at me with wide, confused eyes.

What more could I say? How could I make her understand what she meant to me?

I breathed in deeply, smelling the strawberries from her shampoo.

"The other night in my parent's back yard, when I took you out there, it was to show you that you were the one I'd been waiting for. I didn't know it then, but it was you I was looking for all those nights lying alone under the stars. It was you I was dreaming of. I've never believed in fate before, but-"

"I don't know if I can believe in fate or in stars Edward," she interrupted, looking down again.

I used my forefinger to bring her eyes up to meet mine.

"I don't need you to believe in fate or in stars Bella. I just need you to believe in _us._ Can you believe in that?"

She tried to look down, to look away again, but I kept my finger firmly under her chin, pleading with my eyes.

"Bella, can you believe in us?"

Her lips trembled, but she didn't answer. One solitary tear rolled down her cheek.

"Bella, can you believe in us?" I repeated one last time.

She didn't answer.

With my heart in my throat, so tight and constricted I could barely breathe or see straight, I forced myself to speak.

"I think I should leave."

Blindly, I forced myself to walk away from her, picked up my coat from the coat rack, turned the door knob silently, and walked out.

She made no move to stop me.

**A/N: Leave me reviews and let me know what you're thinking. **

**I'm sure there are lots of mixed emotions, and I wish I could tell you all more right now. But remember, the next chapter will be posted later this week, and it is entitled, 'The Make Up'. They got their issues out in the open, now they have to work them out.**

**Please have faith and don't hate Bella too much. Try to remember everything she's been through, and that while Edward is 100% right - he can't and shouldn't pay for something some other man did - we are in reality only human, and trusting again is sometimes hard, even if the person's earned that trust.**

**That song from Savage Garden came out when I was pregnant with my first child, and as soon as I heard it the first time, it became a song for my baby. I used to sing it to her in utero all the time, and after she was born it used to calm her at nights. To me, it's always been a song from parent to child, though I'm not sure that's how Savage Garden intended it. The song's been in my head for Edward to sing to Maddie since this story first started churning around in my brain. Let me know what you think.**


	23. Chapter 22 The Make Up

**Chapter 22 – The Make Up**

**Chapter Song Recs:**

**First half of chapter: **_**Please Don't Leave Me**_**– Pink  
****Second half of chapter: **_**Endless Love**_**– Diana Ross, Lionel Ritchie (oldie but goodie)  
**_**Teenage Dream**_** – Katy Perry**

**A/N: **** Just as a mild warning, this chapter is where this story earns its M rating **** **

**Alright guys. If you've stuck around for the last few chapters, which I know have been tough, then here's your reward. Hope it makes up for the last few chapters of angst. And I hope you can all (or most of you, at least) forgive and understand Bella once this chappy is done. I actually played around with the idea of writing out the major events of the last couple of chapters (stargazing, call from Tanya, airline tix and Kate/Irina) from B's POV for the beginning of this chapter, but then I changed my mind. First, because I don't usually like to do the same scene from two POVs. I feel like it slows the story down and I write too much already as it is (as I'm sure you've all noticed), and second because I think (I hope) that after the last chapter and the beginning of this one, you guys will be able to more or less figure out for yourselves what kind of thoughts were running through Bella's mind during those events. Whether you can agree with or understand her feelings or not will depend entirely on the individual reading, and that is more than fine. **

**Finally, some of you reviewing anonymously or without logging in have left a few reviews lately that I really wish I could respond to. But unless you log in, I can't do that. This is a real shame because I'd love to tell you why I think that a man that can do for himself (as in cooking, cleaning and plumbing) is 100 times sexier than a man that hires someone to do all that for him, rich or not, and why I don't think that a woman's self-esteem issues when it comes to men has any bearing on her ability to do a kick-ass job in the boardroom, or even explain to you that refusing to accept first-class airline tickets doesn't mean you think you don't deserve them, it may just mean you don't feel like you can live up to all the expectations they represent. So please don't think I'm ignoring your reviews when you do so anonymously or without logging in, I just have no way of getting back to you.**

**Okay. And now I'd like to thank my beta Danna0724 for all her mad beta-ing skills. She's the reason these chappys have been out so quickly the past couple of weeks. **

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**BPOV**

_Four years ago:_

_I sat on the sofa, holding Maddie on my lap while she played with her rattle and occasionally reached up to stick her small, chubby hand in my mouth; sweet gurgles and the rare consonant escaping from between her lips. I ran my hand down the length of her dark hair, smooth and straight – Quileute hair. It was almost to her shoulders already, though she was barely six months old. I trailed my hand to her little caramel face, still awed by how soft and smooth it felt, like silk between my fingers. She looked up at me and I smiled, kissing her little fingers; big innocent brown eyes meeting tired, defeated ones. From the bedroom, I could hear the sounds of Paul packing; his curses as he blamed everyone and everything under the sun for the total collapse of our marriage; everyone except himself. I mean, common sense should've told him getting caught screwing one of my best friends on our marriage bed was pretty much the death kiss to our union, no?_

_I snorted, wondering again why this wasn't hurting me more. Why I felt an overwhelming sense of relief more than anything. Where had my heart gone? The only runner up to the relief was guilt; guilt that Maddie wouldn't grow up with a mother and father by her side. But then I'd remember that Maddie was six months old and Paul had yet to hold her. What was she really losing? A cardboard cut out of a father? I'd been both mother and father to her since the second she'd been born; I'd continue being so forever now I supposed._

"_This is your last chance Bella. I walk out that door, I'm not walking back in," Paul's voice warned. _

_He'd finished his packing and was standing on the threshold between our bedroom and our small family room, tall and imposing, his eyes narrowed in irritation at my gall at declaring the final straw. A large duffel bag was thrown haphazardly at his side, its contents spilling out on the floor._

_I sighed, keeping my eyes low. "If you're leaving anything you'll want later, you'll have to get the landlord to let you in. I won't be here. I'm moving back in with Charlie."_

_He smirked. "'Course you are, daddy's little girl. 'Cause you know you can't make it on your own."_

_Who the heck had been paying all the bills around here for over a year? It wasn't worth bringing up though, so I remained quiet._

"_You know, I'm sure that brother of mine won't mind taking my sloppy seconds. Why don't you give him a call?" he taunted. I knew what he was doing; trying to lure me into an argument. But I was tired of fighting with him; tired of his games, tired of his lies. Just plain old tired. I said nothing._

_I could feel his anger intensifying._

"_You know this is your fault right? Maybe if you'd been more of a wife; more fun. Not some fucking forty-year old bore in the body of a twenty-one year old."_

_That hurt. But still, I remained quiet._

"_It wouldn't have killed you to come out drinking with me once in a while," he continued. "Go to a party or two."_

_This was the first time in our entire relationship I'd ever gotten an invite._

"_That was never me Paul. You knew that when you married me. Besides, things might have gotten crowded if I'd come along," I added dryly; and then gave myself an internal kick for rising to the bait._

_He conveniently ignored my comment anyway. "And then once that kid came along, forget it. The baby this, the baby that," he mimicked. "At least before I could expect some occasional half-assed sex from you, but now…shit, not even that."_

_I made myself look up at him; rich black hair he'd recently cropped short, sharply defined features that could've been chiseled out of stone, eyes that matched his hair, skin that looked like he was sporting a tropical sun-tan year round - even in this rainy corner of the earth, tall; even taller than Jake, and a physique he'd always been proud of. So beautiful on the outside, so cold and hurtful on the inside. _

_He sneered at me when he caught my gaze, his black eyes sparkling with amusement; as if he'd just told the funniest joke. _

_Had I actually loved this man once? Had there been a time I'd thought fate brought us together? Had I actually __**believed **__in fate once?_

_It was on the tip of my tongue, to tell him he apparently hadn't needed any half-assed sex from me since he'd been getting it from my friend; our daughter's sitter. But I bit my lip, refusing to rise to his bait anymore, and turned away from him again. Out of my periphery, I saw him draw in a deep breath._

"_Last chance Bella," he threatened again, his voice low and gruff. "I walk out that door you're going to be alone for the rest of your life. No one but my brother's gonna want you, at least not for the long haul. All boring and tired, and with a kid to boot."_

_I forced myself to look at him again, meeting his gaze for the very last time in this long, complicated relationship of ours. He smiled coolly, perfect white teeth contrasting against russet skin._

"_I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life than in crappy company."_

_His dark eyes registered surprise for a split second, before his upper lip twisted in a snarl, and in one quick movement he picked his bag up and tossed it over his shoulder, stalking to the door in three quick strides and pulling it open, practically off its hinges. And with no more flourish, Paul Forrester - my teenaged love, my first and only lover, my husband, the father of my child - stormed out, slamming the door behind him._

_**He's gone. He's gone. He's gone**__, I chanted to myself, rocking my daughter on my lap, waiting for the pain, the sadness to wash over me. But strangely enough, I felt nothing. It was as if the moment I walked in on Jessica and Paul, some invisible wall had been erected around my heart, protecting me, keeping my emotions in check; my heart safe. _

_The man I'd once hoped would be my happily ever after had just left, and I felt nothing. I no longer believed in him. I no longer believed in __**us.**_

_And other than my daughter, what was left to believe in now?_

OOOOOOOOOO

**Present Day:**

'_Can you believe in us?'  
_'_Can you believe in us?'_

Edward's words circled around and around in my mind, while I stood frozen, unable to make myself move away from the counter that was supporting most of my weight at the moment.

Had all this actually just happened? Was I in the middle of some long, drawn out nightmare? Maybe if I stayed here long enough, frozen, unmoving, I'd wake up. I'd wake up and it would be the weekend and Edward and I would be in my bed, his arms wrapped around me tightly and his warm breath in my hair, chasing the bad dreams away.

I closed my eyes tightly, my hands closing around the edges of the counter, willing myself to wake up. I opened my eyes.

Nothing had changed.

'_Can you believe in us?'  
_'_Can you believe in us?'_

Silent tears ran down my face, remembering Edward's eyes when he repeated the question, over and over again, giving me opportunity after opportunity to answer him.

Why couldn't I answer? Why? He'd been nothing but good to me, to both Maddie and me since the moment he'd walked into our lives.

'_Can you believe in us?'  
_'_Can you believe in us?'_

I closed my eyes again, a small whimper escaping my lips. I brought my hand up to cover my mouth, the sight of Edward walking out the door burned into my irises.

Flashes of memories assaulted me, all mixed together in the confusion that was my mind.

_Paul walking out of our tiny apartment for the last time. Relief washing over me as I witnessed the death of my marriage; the death of my innocence; the death of my trust.  
_'_I walk out this door you'll be alone for the rest of your life.'  
_'_No one's gonna want you, at least not for the long haul.'_

_Edward's tender face, green eyes spearing me, begging me to believe.  
_'_I love you Bella, both you and Maddie.'  
_'_Can you believe in us?'_

_Edward walking out of my apartment_.

A sharp stab of pain suddenly hit me, doubling me over, the pain radiating from the middle of my chest to every extremity in my body.

Why couldn't I answer? Why couldn't I answer?

The phone rang, momentarily breaking me out of my agony. My first thought was Edward.

He was giving me another chance to answer his question. Could I do it this time? I wiped my tears away roughly and reached for the phone lying haphazardly along the counter, desperately trying to come up with an answer to his question. Quickly, I checked the Caller ID.

**Swan, Charles – Forks, Washington**

The phone rang again and again before I'd composed myself enough to answer.

"Hello?" I murmured, hearing the quake in my voice.

"Bells hon! I thought I was gonna have to try your cell phone! How ya doin' kid?"

"Dad?" I responded weakly.

"Yeah Bells. It's me. Figured I'd give you a call and get your flight information for Wednesday. Is that granddaughter of mine gettin' excited yet?"

"Dad I-"

"Now I told Sue you insisted on doin' the turkey, so she insisted she's gonna do the sides and I told her that was fine, 'cause honestly hon, you're gonna be exhausted after that long flight. And Billy and Jake are supposed to bring dessert and the beer. Although knowin' those two they'll show up with a couple of boxes of Twinkies and-"

"Jake?" I whispered.

"Yeah, Jake and Billy." Charlie paused. "Hey Bells, you okay?"

"Dad, did you speak to Jake?"

"Couple a days ago. Why?"

"I…Dad I…"

"Bells, what's going on hon?"

The sudden concern in his voice was more than I could take right now. I bit my lip, trying to hold back the tears, but they came anyway, and the pause in conversation was enough to let Charlie know that something was wrong. He gave me my time though, and once some sixth sense told him I was ready to speak again, he asked me what happened.

I cleared my throat. "I had a fight with Jake." It was only part of the story, but since he didn't know about the rest of it yet, I figured it was the best place to start.

Charlie exhaled loudly. "About?"

"About…Dad it was about-"

"Was it about Edward?" he asked in a gentle voice.

My words caught in my throat, my puffy eyes growing wide.

"How do you…Dad how do you know…"

"About Edward? Bells hon, I've known about Edward since you were here a few weeks ago."

"How?" I managed to squeak out.

Charlie chuckled. "Well, Maddie kept going on and on about her best friend Edward, which was fine and all, but once she said Edward took her and mommy out to dinner for mommy's birthday, and Edward drove her and mommy to dance class, and Edward was so strong he carried her on his shoulders and she could almost see over the trees. Well, I kinda started suspecting Edward wasn't a five-year old little boy." He chuckled again.

I didn't know what to say.

"So was it about Edward?"

"Yeah," I admitted. "But…" - I sighed – "that's not really why I'm…I mean I wish Jake and I hadn't argued but…" I felt my throat constricting as I pictured Edward leaving again, and I couldn't finish speaking.

"You and Edward had a fight?"

"Yeah," I said, my voice shaking.

"'Bout Jake?'

"About Jake," I confirmed, "About lots of things."

We were both silent for a few moments.

"Bell hon, is this Edward _Edward Cullen_? Your boss?"

"Yes."

"Hmm," he murmured.

"Dad, I know you've probably heard and read some…stuff about him. But he's not like that dad. He's not."

"First of all, you know I don't listen to or read any of that gossip junk. 'Specially after the crap you had to go through 'round here."

I nodded, even though he couldn't see me.

"Second, you don't gotta convince me Bells, or Jake for that matter. This is your life to lead the way you see fit. And I for one trust your judgment."

I snorted in disbelief. "Trust my judgment? After the whole thing with Paul? How can you trust my judgment after all that?"

Charlie was quiet for a few moments. I could hear his rough, rhythmic breathing, and I could almost see him stroking his mustache with two fingers, thinking through is words. Charlie wasn't a man of many words, and this conversation tonight had probably been the longest one we'd held in years.

"Bella, let me ask you something hon, and now be honest," he urged softly. "Did you ever really believe Paul was right for you? I mean, I know you loved him once and you tried your best to make things work. But in your heart Bella, did you believe he was right for you?"

I searched my mind, remembering the butterflies in my stomach the first time Paul looked at me, the exhilaration at knowing he wanted _me_, the nauseous feeling that accompanied me throughout the rest of our relationship, the knowledge I'd tried to suppress that I wasn't the only one he wanted, and I never would be.

"No dad. I guess I always knew, deep inside somewhere, that we weren't right together."

"So you know Bella. You know what's good for you and what's not." He exhaled loudly. "At the end of the day Bells, I'm not the one that needs to trust your judgment, you are."

I didn't answer.

Charlie sighed. "Bells, you were really young when you met Paul, and sometimes when we're young we make stupid mistakes, even the best and brightest of us. Fortunately, sometimes those mistakes are more than just painful learning experiences. Sometimes we get to walk away with an unexpected treasure. Like you, with your mom and me, and Maddie, with you and Paul."

The tears rolled down my cheeks again. Why had I been so afraid to talk to my dad?

"If your gut instinct is that this guy Edward's not right for you, then follow it Bells. If he seems to be sneaky and untrustworthy, get out as fast as you can. I don't listen to all that gossip bullshit, but I'm not deaf or blind either, and I can't say I'm happy you're dating someone with his reputation…" - he was silent for a few seconds.

"But if your gut tells you something different Bella, if what's holding you back is fear because of what Paul did to you…" He stopped again, exhaling loudly. Like me, Charlie didn't like mentioning Paul or what had happened – "don't let your past stop you from believing in the present. It's not fair to you, it's not fair to Maddie, and it's not fair to anyone else that loves you. You live your life based on what you believe in now, not on what you used to believe back then. Take it from me hon, I had it wrong for a long time, and that's time I'll never get back."

I was crying openly now, but Charlie didn't say anything else for a long while. Finally, after his sixth sense told him I'd calmed down, he asked,

"You gonna be okay kid?"

"Yeah, I'm going to be okay…thanks dad."

He cleared his throat. "Sure, sure."

My eyes jumped to the small clock on the microwave. It was hard to believe it had only been fifteen minutes since Edward left. Fifteen long, agonizing minutes.

"Dad I've gotta go. I'll call you with the flight information tomorrow okay?"

"Sure, sure," he repeated. "You go live your present Bella, and don't let anything or anyone other than your heart and your conscience guide you. Leave the past behind."

"I am dad."

I hung up and quickly dialed Alice.

OOOOOOOOOO

I walked into the lobby of the quiet, elegant West Broadway building, Eli pulling the door open for me. The delicate chandelier sparkled in the ceiling, sending a prismatic wave of incandescent light bouncing off the marble tiled walls. The warmth of the heat inside, as well as the warmth in Eli's face, helped calm my decidedly rattled nerves.

"Ms. Swan," Eli greeted me. If he was surprised to see me here alone he hid it well. But his lips twitched with a pleased smile. "How are you this evening?"

"I'm…how are you doing Eli?" I asked, circumventing an answer I couldn't give yet. I hadn't bothered to wash my face before rushing out of the apartment as soon as Alice got there, and I had a feeling my blotchy skin and red eyes told their own story.

"Not too bad, not too bad," he said, a kind twinkle in his eye.

And while I was fond of Eli, and under other circumstances I would've taken some time to hold a short conversation with him, the only thing I could think of right now was getting to Edward. What I was going to say to him once I was with him I had no idea.

"Do you mind letting Edward know I'm here please?" There were no such things as unannounced visits in these types of buildings.

Eli pressed his lips together and shrugged. "I'm afraid Mr. Cullen's not here Ms. Swan."

My heart constricted painfully.

Eli jerked his head towards the street. "He's over at the park. Went for a jog. He looked like he had a lot on his mind, and running's how he clears his head."

I immediately made for the door. Eli quickly got in front of it, blocking my way.

"I'm sorry Ms. Swan, I don't mean to be too forward, but it's pretty cold and dark out there. I'm sure Mr. Cullen would prefer if you waited here for him."

"I have to go find him Eli."

Eli smiled, a smile that let me know he knew – or he'd guessed enough - and he understood.

"Ms. Swan, Mr. Cullen will be back shortly. Trust me. Now I can't in good conscience let you go wandering around Central Park in the dark by yourself. Mr. Cullen would have my head."

"But-"

"He'll be back soon," he smiled warmly. "Trust me. Whatever he's looking for, he's not going to find it in the park."

I bit my lip anxiously, but the subconscious connection I'd made between Eli and my dad prevented me from walking through that door. Resigned, I stepped away from the door, gnawing at the inside of my lip and rubbing my gloved hands together. Eli watched me from his post. I moved against the wall and waited.

"El amor no es facil," Eli suddenly said. I looked up. He was watching me with a knowing smile.

I sighed. I had no idea what he'd said but the expression on his face was easy to read. He knew I'd messed up.

"I didn't trust myself enough Eli," I murmured, recalling what he'd told me a couple of weeks ago.

He chuckled once more and shook his head. "We all make mistakes Ms. Swan. What's important is that we learn from them."

I nodded and lowered my head again, rubbing one palm nervously with the thumb of the other hand. I knew Eli was right; it was basically the same thing my dad had said just a little while ago, but knowing in your heart and believing in your mind are two different things. And while my heart wanted to believe Edward would never grow tired of me, my mind and the little voice inside me was still in turmoil, unable to relax until I looked into those green eyes again, eyes that would be my only salvation.

"Ms. Swan, how 'bout I let you wait upstairs?" Eli suggested, watching my fidgety hands reprovingly. He continued in a fatherly tone. "It's cold down in this lobby and I'm sure you'll be much more comfortable upstairs."

"What if Edward-"

"I'm sure Mr. Cullen won't mind," he answered quickly. Leading me to the elevator by my arm, he let me in and turned the key allowing the elevator to stop on Edward's penthouse floor.

Just as the doors were about to close, he looked in one last time. "Remember Ms. Swan, trust _yourself_ and the rest will fall into place."

OOOOOOOOOO

The sound of the elevator motor grinding against the wheels - the heavy chain moving up and down, up and down – was the only noise keeping me company. Well, that and the loud thumping of my heart in my ears, and my breathing, noisy, tense and erratic. Every time the motor would start up, my heart would jump and my head would shoot up from where I sat in front of Edward's door – my legs up against my chest and my head down - waiting for him to appear. But the minutes passed; first five, then ten, then twenty, and still no Edward. At the forty-eight minute mark, I stood up – unable to sit and wait any longer. Impatiently I pressed the call button for the elevator. I had to go find him, even if I had to wander all of Central Park in the dark. I had to find Edward.

Finally, I heard the elevator come to a stop beyond the closed doors, the ding that signaled the opening of the doors, and when they opened my heart got caught in my throat, and every nerve in my body awoke and stood at attention.

Edward's head was down when the doors opened, his dark clothing wet from snow or perspiration – I couldn't tell – and his hands shoved deep in the pockets of the hoodie he wore, covering his head. He looked up suddenly, his emerald eyes startling at the sight of me standing there.

I backed up nervously, giving him room to walk out of the elevator. After a few seconds of staring at me, he moved forward slowly, cautiously, his hands still in his pockets, his expression tense and wary.

"Bella," he finally said, as if he were unsure of what to make of my presence. I opened my mouth, but no words came out.

His expression became more wary, his eyes narrowed as his gaze burned right through me. Abruptly he snorted and shook his head, moving past me towards his door. Slowly I turned towards him. He stood leaning against his door, one foot pressed against it, his hands still firmly in his pockets. He wouldn't look at me anymore; instead he kept his eyes trained straight ahead, at some fixed point just beyond me. He swallowed thickly, his Adam's Apple bobbing up and down slowly. His whole body radiated guardedness, but his eyes…his eyes gave away how hurt he was. How much I'd hurt him.

"Go ahead," he said in a low, resigned voice.

And at that moment, watching him standing there - this man that had given himself to me so completely, that had done everything in his power to earn my trust, to earn my _daughter's_ trust, to be the man for both of us that Paul had _never_ been - standing there guarding himself from _me_…it broke me.

_What had I done?_

The words I spoke weren't planned. I hadn't known what to say when I saw him. But watching him now, they just came to me. _Trust yourself and the rest will fall into place._

I swallowed nervously, my voice shaking.

"After I was accepted to Dartmouth senior year of high school, my friend Angela and me took a trip up to New Hampshire, to take a look at the campus."

Edward's eyes twitched, but he kept his gaze beyond me.

"I guess there was some big game going on that day; the entire campus buzzed with excitement. I couldn't tell you what they said though," I shrugged, "I wasn't really paying much attention. Sports have never really been my thing, as you well know," I chuckled weakly. Edward sighed but made no other outward sign that he'd heard me.

I cleared my throat. "Right when we were getting ready to leave campus that afternoon, there was a big commotion, and a huge group of students and faculty marched our way, laughing and yelling, their faces and clothes painted white and green, some guys in white and green uniforms hooting and howling while they carried someone on their shoulders."

Edward frowned slightly, as if something about the story had jogged something in his own memory.

"I never got to see him…the guy they were carrying. I wanted to. There was something…." – I drew in a deep breath – "There was something pulling me to him, something telling me I _had_ to see him, some invisible magnet…" I looked down. "But my mind was on other things that day, and in the end, I let the opportunity pass me by. Because I was too scared of the unknown."

The frown on Edward's face deepened, his eyes taking on a far away look. He opened his mouth to speak, then hesitated and closed it again. He tried again.

"This was your senior year of high school?" he asked, his voice velvety and rough at the same time.

I nodded.

He nodded too, slowly, understanding flooding his eyes. Finally, he looked at me, his face still stoic and cautious.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Because I just figured it out myself. The other day, at your parent's house. It just hit me all of a sudden."

He nodded again, and suddenly his expression changed. He became more resigned, his eyes more disillusioned.

"What difference does it make anyway, right? You don't believe in fate."

I held in the tears that were threatening at the corners of my eyes; the pain that his pain was causing me. I owed him more than that.

"You were right Edward," I said, my voice quivering. "Jake is my oldest friend, but you shouldn't have had to sit there and listen to me talking to him as if you didn't exist. He should've been told a while ago."

Edward drew in a deep breath.

"And…and I should've known. I should've known you loved me. It's been in everything you do for both Maddie and me, in every word you speak, in every action."

His mouth quivered, and his hands came out of his pockets, his fingers stretched out wide as if he were fighting with himself to keep them in place. But I had to get it all out.

"But I've been scared Edward. Not just since you came along, but long before that. Maddie and I…we've been alone for a long time. And I thought I was fine with that. I'd accepted that. I'd put up these walls around us to keep us safe."

"Bella," he breathed, and took a step towards me. I took a step back.

"Let me get this out Edward. Please," I begged.

He pursed his lips and nodded slowly.

"And then you came along, and I thought I'd let those walls down, but it turns out…it turns out there was still a wall up. And I'm sorry Edward."

"Bella _I'm_ sorry. I had no right to do what I did. Please stop-"

"I'm sorry because you didn't deserve that. You _don't_ deserve my doubts or my insecurities. But _he_ told me I'd always be alone, that I wasn't good enough, and I believed him."

Edward closed his eyes and shook his head. "Bella, please let me-"

"I'm sorry because I should've believed _you._ You've been telling me all along, _showing_ me all along in your actions. You're the one who deserves my trust, yet you're the one I've been punishing for his lies. I'm sorry," I said, my voice cracking.

"Bella please stop apologizing," Edward pleaded, taking another step towards me. I held up one hand between us.

"But mostly, I'm sorry because when you told me you loved me, I should've told you. I should've told you _before_ then. You deserved to hear it before then. You deserved to hear it every time you picked me up to take me where I needed to go. You deserved to hear it that day in the stairwell, when you let me hold on to you and cry. You deserved to hear it every time you made my daughter smile. You deserved to hear it every night you held me in your arms and didn't ask for more. You deserved to hear it every time you made me feel like I was the only woman in the world. And I don't know if I waited too long, but I'll tell you now."

I looked deep in his eyes, opening my heart, my soul to him. Because _he_ deserved nothing less.

"I love you Edward," I said, my voice shaking. "I love you with everything I am. I love you like I've never loved another man before." Despite my best efforts, the tears started falling. "And I'm scared, and I'm a god-damned mess, but I love you. And I need you. And I want to live in the present, if you still want me. I don't want to miss another opportunity to love you because I'm too scared of the unknown."

Edward gazed at me with so much emotion, his green eyes blazing.

"I…I don't know if I believe in fate or in stars Edward. But I believe that something happened that day at Dartmouth, I believe I felt you even then, my heart felt you even then, and I believe in _you_, and how you make me feel, and in the love you have for my daughter, and I…" – I started crying – "I…"

"Can you believe in us?" Edward asked one last time.

This time, there was no hesitancy, no doubt when I answered clearly and quickly.

"Yes. Yes Edward. I can believe in _us_."

"Then that's all I need you to believe in."

Without knowing how or when, our mouths crashed against each other, and I had no idea if he'd pulled me in, or if I'd thrown myself at him, but it didn't matter. His hands went to either side of my face, holding me tightly between them, possessively, assuredly. He parted my lips with his tongue, before we both met in a frenzied kiss, knocking against each other with a fierce determination. His hands went into my hair, grabbing me roughly but gently at the same time, and somehow I found the ability to make my own hands move and I reached for his hair, tugging on it with the same intensity he tugged mine, my busy mouth twisting up in a grin at the sound of the moan emanating from his mouth.

"I'm sorry Bella," he murmured into my mouth. "I didn't know. I didn't know-"

I shook my head. "Don't Edward," I answered without pausing in my kisses to his mouth. "Please. No more apologies. Not now."

He stopped apologizing, placing hungry kisses on my mouth over and over again, taking first my top lip and then my bottom between his own.

"Where…" – he pulled on my lips – "Where's Maddie?" His breathing was hard and erratic.

I smiled, that even in the middle of this_,_ he'd think of our Maddie.

I kissed him back, pulling on his bottom lip, elated to be in his arms again. "She's home…with Alice."

He nodded. "Are you…" - he sighed into my mouth – "Are you ready to head back?"

In the split second it took me to answer, I took a deep look inside myself.

For so long, I'd doubted myself. Not so much on the outside, or in my career. But as a woman. Paul's parting words had buried themselves deep in my subconscious, until I'd come to accept them as a given. I wasn't enough. I hadn't been able to satisfy him; therefore I'd never satisfy any man. But…

But then Edward had come along, and he looked at me as if I were the only woman in the world; he treated me as if I were the most beautiful and precious creature in existence. And standing here in his arms, I couldn't for the life of me understand how I'd let Paul's disregard overrule Edward's love.

All in that split-second, I searched for the little voice. The one that had accompanied me since the day I walked in on Paul and Jessica. The sentry at the gates of my heart. The one who'd kept me from taking that final leap of faith with Edward. The small remnant of distrust still left over from the past.

The little voice wasn't there.

I looked deep into his beautiful green eyes, so obviously full of love I wondered how I'd ever missed it.

"No. I'm not."

It took him two seconds to grasp the meaning of my words, and I knew when he did because he went stock still, his hands freezing at the nape of my neck. He gazed at me intently.

"Not like this Bella. Not to prove something to me."

I tightened my hold on his hair. "I'm not trying to prove something to you. I'm _showing_ you that I want to share myself with you." – I moved my lips to his – "I want you to share yourself with me."

His emerald eyes darkened, almost black, piercing me with restrained desire. He searched my face for a few seconds, looking for something, for either denial or confirmation in my eyes.

"Please Edward."

And then his hands weren't in my hair anymore, they were grabbing my hips, and in one swift movement I was up against his door and his whole body was pressed up against mine, his hips moving against me, making me gasp.

I dropped my hands from his hair and moved them under his hoodie, further under his shirt, until his heated bare skin was against my hands; I trailed them across his tight stomach, reveling in the way he felt, the way he sucked in his breath at my touch, the hard planes of his abs, the smoothness of his hips. I scratched my nails against them.

"God damn Bella," he groaned. I stiffened, afraid I'd hurt him.

"Don't stop. Please…don't stop," he murmured against my lips. I obliged him happily.

His mouth moved down my jaw, kissing and biting and licking as he went, and then he was sucking on my neck, trailing up to the sensitive spot below my earlobe. I threw my head back against the door and instinctively pulled him in closer, my hips moving desperately against his, and he gasped against my neck, his warm breath spilling all over me, burning me deliciously.

One hand swiftly left my hip, digging deep into his pocket and coming up with something jingly; keys. He reached behind me and unlocked the door quickly, encircling my waist with his other hand and carrying me inside. I raised my arms to his shoulders and before I knew it he was slamming the door behind us and pinning me against the other side of it now.

Consumed with raw desire, Edward lips found mine again, and his hands trailed slowly up my torso, my insistent kisses urging him on. But there was too much material on me, my heavy winter coat a thick barrier still between us. He slowly pulled the zipper down.

"May I?" he murmured in my ear.

"Please," I managed to squeak out. With a new determination, he lowered the zipper swiftly and I twisted and turned until the coat fell off me. Suddenly his hands were inside and trailing under my sweater, heat radiating between the both of us. Slowly, his thumbs grazed the bottom of my bra. A question hung in the air. In answer, I arched my back, pressing myself against his hands, the fine hairs on my neck standing up at the feel of his palms on me.

"Uhh Bella," he groaned, attacking my mouth again, his hands feeling me, moving around over my bra. "So soft…"

_So good._

But not enough.

I brought my hands up to his chest, pushing him away. Immediately he backed up slightly, looking at me questioningly. With my chest heaving from the excitement and desire, the unmasked love in his eyes spurring me on, I crossed my arms over my torso, bringing my hands down to the hem of my sweater and in one quick movement pulling it over my head.

Edward's eyes grew wider still; his breathing erratic, but his eyes never left mine. With no idea where my brazenness was coming from, but completely sure of the rightness of what I was doing, I slowly reached behind me, feeling for the clasp of my bra and undoing it. Raising first one hand and then the other to my shoulders to pull the straps down, I let it fall to the floor in between us.

No one had ever looked at me the way Edward looked at me. If I hadn't finally understood it, the way he gazed at me - so full of adoration - would've shown me. His eyes told me it didn't matter how gorgeous or sophisticated the women Edward had previously been with were. It didn't matter how bold or beautiful the women who wanted him were. _I_ was who _he_ wanted. _I_ was beautiful to _him_.

And at that moment, I _felt_ beautiful. I _felt _enough.

Edward swallowed thickly. The frenzy from a few seconds ago now completely forgotten, he moved closer to me slowly, almost as if in slow motion.

His lips met mine gently now, with a reverence that took my breath away. His hands came to my bare shoulders, his fingers firmly against my skin, sending a blazing burn throughout my body.

_So good_.

But not enough.

As he kissed me softly, tenderly, I brought my hands to rest on his chest, for the first time feeling the dampness of his hoodie. And then I realized he was shivering.

"You're wet," I whispered. He nodded. I lowered my hands to the bottom of his hoodie. His hands met mine and together, we pulled the hoodie over his head, dropping it over where my bra lay on the dark wood floors.

With only a thin t-shirt between us, I pulled him into me, sparks crackling like fire between us at the feel of his chest pressed against my breasts. But it still wasn't enough. With his lips still on mine, I lowered my hands once more and pulled his shirt over his head.

Bare chest to bare chest, we gasped at the sensation, consumed by the overwhelming heat, the electricity buzzing between us. I dug my fingers into the belt hoops in his jeans, and his hands crept up my sides, almost painful in their languidness, his fingers trailing back and forth, back and forth, until finally, they reached their intended goal, and his hands cupped me gently, melding and molding my skin between his strong hands.

"Edward," I whispered in a low moan, lowering my head to his shoulder, too lost to feel any awkwardness, and this was Edward after all. How could I feel awkward when he touched me so reverently, when his eyes were so full of love? I threw my head back again and Edward's lips moved down my jaw, sucking gently, moving over my collar bone and then trailing lower, his tongue tasting me. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, the sounds escaping my lips sounds long-forgotten, the sensations coursing through my body bolder and more pronounced than they'd ever been before.

And then his hands moved to the back of my legs and he lifted me up, guiding my limbs around his waist; the feel of him right there again with so little clothes between us igniting a scorching fire, and instinctively I pressed myself deeper into him.

He gasped against my bare skin, his warm breath hitting the places he'd just been sucking and sending a wave of shivers through me. With my legs around his waist and my arms around his shoulders, he carried me through his penthouse, bringing his lips to mine again and kissing me more intensely, his tongue enveloping mine once more.

Realizing we were headed towards his bedroom, I pulled my lips away from his.

"Not there."

He frowned questioningly, cocking his head.

"By the fireplace."

His eyes blazed with understanding, and he guided us towards the fireplace, using one hand to grab the throw from his sectional and throwing it urgently over the floor. He lowered me onto it, sinking himself over me and pressing his entire body against mine. He kissed me again, languidly, his tongue playing softly with mine, and then pulling one end of the blanket over, he covered me and stood up, the darkness silhouetting his bare chest.

Quickly, he lit the fireplace and returned, kneeling in front of me. Then he took me by the hands and sat me up in front of him, letting his eyes trail over me.

"Beautiful," he murmured. "So beautiful. So _perfect_." And I felt it; in his eyes I felt beautiful, I felt perfect for _him._

His gaze causing a growing need inside me, I reached out and pulled him into me, and he lowered us back down on the throw. Our mouths met again and opened against each other, his tongue teasing my lips slowly, but there was a hunger and desperation in the way he held me. His hands cupped my face, golden green eyes sparkling in the firelight.

"I love you Bella," he murmured, holding my gaze.

I nodded, feeling the sting in my eyes from the barrage of emotions threatening, but I fought through them to answer him.

"I love you too Edward…so much."

He smiled, the crooked grin so similar to his public one, but with an expression meant only for me, and then he lowered his lips to mine softly once, twice, his hands moving to my sides, my ribs; stroking and exploring before his lips followed the line his hands traced. I threw my head back, my chest arching up as his mouth reached the soft mounds on my chest. I gasped, breathing his name softly.

My control slipping and my ability to think quickly fading away, I lowered my hands between us, moving my fingers to fumble at the fly on his jeans. Edward stilled, his eyes coming back to meet mine. With our eyes locked together, I slowly lowered the zipper on his pants, and when it was all the way down, I moved my hands to his hips, pushing the heavy material down. He raised his hips to help me. When they were down by his knees, he used one leg to lower them all the way down before flinging them across the floor with his foot.

Edward lay above me in nothing more than a pair of dark boxers, and my heart swelled in my chest at the sight of this beautiful man, beautiful both outside _and_ in.

Throughout our entire exchange, there had been an unspoken agreement; I set the pace, he would do nothing without my unequivocal agreement. Well his pants were off; it was time for mine to follow suit.

Still keeping our eyes on each other's, Edward's hands fell to my hips, and watching me carefully, he began to lower my sweat pants, his scorching hands igniting searing flames against my outer thighs as he trailed them lower and lower, carefully pulling them off and discarding them with his own.

With only the light from the fire to illuminate us, Edward and I lay there with nothing else between us except our underwear.

Both our breathing erratic and raspy, we gazed at each other, drinking each other in, memorizing each other with our eyes first, before following it with our touch.

With halting, deliberate movement, Edward rested his entire weight on me, our bodies molding to each other's specifications, like two pieces of the same puzzle. He kissed me softly again, his fingers trailing up my bare thighs, coming to rest on the edges of my panties. With one nervous kiss, he gazed in my eyes again.

"I need to know you really want this Bella," he murmured, his green eyes shining with honesty. "We can stop right now if you want." He lowered his head before bringing his eyes back to me. "I can't- I won't be able to bare it if you regret this. If you have second thoughts after…"

I cupped his face between my hands. "I'll never regret this Edward. I'll never regret _us_. I want this. I _need_ this. I need _all_ of you."

He must've seen the truth in my eyes, because his fingers hooked under my panties and he pushed them down slowly. When he came back up, I put my hands on his hips and repeated his actions. Our hearts beating wildly and in sync, we kissed again, slowly and passionately, the feel of him right on me, right there, waiting, pulsing between us.

Abruptly his face reddened in the low light of the fire. "I…I'm clean Bella. I've had myself checked out. But if you want me to I'll get a…"

I shook my head quickly. Even though I hadn't been ready to do this with Edward when we'd first started, I'd made a lunch-time visit to the GYN that first week and gotten a prescription for the pill.

"I'm clean too. And I'm…protected," I whispered.

Edward nodded in understanding.

With no further questions, no further doubts, no more discussion, he parted my legs with his own, and with a slight shift of his hips, he settled himself and brought our bodies together completely.

My back arched automatically, my arms wrapping around his neck tightly at the first thrust, equal parts pleasure and pain. It had been over four years for me, and the initial sensation was shock; stretching. I gasped loudly.

"Are you okay?" Edward breathed roughly, his eyes half-lidded. Both love and lust swirled green and black in his irises; the strain of stilling his movements etching deep marks on his forehead.

"Just-" I blew out a deep gust of air through narrowed lips – "Just give me a sec."

Edward nodded patiently, breathing hard. I shifted my hips under him, finding a more comfortable position, and he lowered his lips to my neck, kissing me softly.

"Bella love, you feel so good. So…warm," he murmured in my ear in a trembling voice. His words sent pleasurable shivers down my spine, awakening sensations deep within me, sensations long dormant which were now waking up with a vengeance. Slowly I lifted my hips to him, encouraging him to move. Ever so softly and gently, he began moving over me, making love to me with every movement, showing me what I meant to him. I pressed my fingers into his shoulders as his movements awakened more and more need within me, every sensation magnified a hundred fold as our hips moved rhythmically and instinctively against each other.

We were as one in that moment; never had two people fit each other so perfectly. If I'd ever doubted he was made for me, every doubt was erased as he gazed deep into my eyes, as we moaned and groaned together, kissing, consuming; breathing each other in. The beautiful noises escaping from between his lips took me higher and higher, soaring beyond anything I'd ever experienced before.

His hands came to mine and he entwined our fingers, bringing our hands over my head as he pushed deeper and deeper, bringing me closer and closer to the edge.

"Shh," he whispered soothingly, pulling on my bottom lip. "You're safe now Bella. Your heart's safe with me. I swear it." I nodded, just then feeling the tears streaming down the sides of my cheeks - tears of pleasure and happiness.

"I love you my sweet Bella," he continued reassuringly. "I love you now and forever. Always you. Only you."

"I love you too," I cried, the feeling within me building, growing; threatening to boil over deliciously. "I love you too Edward," I gasped frantically, my head tossing from side to side, my eyes opening and closing as the last remnants of control quickly evaporated and I hovered on tiptoes at the edge of the cliff.

Edward felt me losing control; on the verge of falling. His hands cupped my face.

"Don't close your eyes Bella," he commanded in a rough voice, still smooth with its natural velvet. "Look at me when you let go. Look at me when you let go," he repeated in a rough whisper.

That was all it took for me to fall, to fall so beautifully, so fully, so completely; my eyes wide open and gazing intently into Edward's. I let go. Let go of my past regrets, my fears, and embraced the here and now, embraced the fulfillment Edward was giving me, so good, so deep, so much it was almost too much to bare.

I cried out his name, over and over, as I went over the cliff, wave after wave of pleasure consuming me; knocking me down and not letting me come up for air. Then the shockwaves rocked me; once, twice, three times. Until I was gasping for air, my nails digging deep in his shoulders, and before the shockwaves completely left me, Edward reached down and grabbed my hips, thrusting hard once, twice and then I felt his own release as he stiffened over me, calling out my name.

His body slacked over me, and he lowered his head over my pounding heart. Still breathing hard, I ran my hands through his soft hair. His body trembled, racked with shiver after shiver.

I brought his head up to meet mine. "You're shivering," I whispered, kissing him once.

He smiled tiredly. "I'll be okay."

And then he lowered his head back over my chest, holding on to my hips tightly, and there, in front of the blazing fire, our bodies and hearts joined as one, we closed our eyes and fell into a peaceful sleep.

**A/N: **

**Reviews please and thank you. Yes, they still have work ahead of them but at least…well, yeah…**

**BPOV**


	24. Chapter 23 Afterglows & Announcements

**A/N: I keep sending these chapters to Danna at inconvenient times, therefore this chapter has not been betad. So please forgive any errors and discrepancies. Speaking of which, Edward did NOT go jogging in jeans last chapter. He changed into sweats, I just forgot to let you all know. **

**Still want to thank Danna0724 because I know she would've done a great job with this if she would've had the time. Love you hon!**

**All characters, except my little Maddie, belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

**Chapter 23 – Afterglows and Announcements **

Chapter Song Rec.:

_Collide_ by Howie Day. (BEAUTIFUL SONG. PLEASE LISTEN TO IT!)

* * *

**EPOV**

The sweet scent of strawberries and lavender wafted through the air, making my mouth water and my heart rate speed up. The sheets and covers that wrapped around me in my sleep felt softer and warmer than ever; so fucking smooth and cozy all at once. Instinctively, my hands gripped for them, to cocoon myself in their perfection. I wanted to drown in them, to let them consume me they felt so god-damn good. I held on possessively, my awareness threatening to return. My muscles flexed protectively around the perfect warmth encircling me, inhaling its intoxicating scent.

"So god-damned good," I murmured drowsily.

Outside my window, across in the park, the birds seemed to greet the approaching day with a brighter note in their songs. "Happy birds," I muttered.

I tightened my grip even more, feeling the smoothness trapped in my palms, the silky softness that I was now beginning to realize could not possibly be man-made. The perfection wrapped all around me was so much more than a set of sheets.

It was a warm body.

The only body in the world that could ever fit so perfectly around mine.

_Bella._

Bands of low light filtered in from between the tightly shuttered blinds, hitting my closed eyelids and signaling the approaching dawn. The most glorious dawn of my twenty-eight years on God's green Earth, because I was greeting it with an angel's legs tangled in mine, her head on my chest, her moist lips just lightly touching the spot over my heart, her long dark hair splayed wildly over us, a few strands tickling my stubbly jaw; my lips.

I opened my eyes slowly while at the same time tightening my grip around the bare body lying across my chest. If this was just a dream, I wasn't letting it go without a fight.

Bella. _My _Bella.

I breathed in a deep sigh, relief and joy intertwined in much the same way our bodies were. I wasn't dreaming. She was really lying here, breathing softly, a peaceful rhythmic sound coming from her lips, a contented expression coloring her subconscious features. She was real. _This _was real. As real as it could possibly get.

It all came back to me.

Bella waiting for me outside my door as I stepped off the elevator; big red puffy eyes stopping my heart.

Bella telling me she loved me. She loved me like she'd never loved any man before.

Bella eyes intently on mine, my blood pounding between my ears as she told me she was ready and _she wanted me_.

Bella and I…making love by the fireplace.

Making _love_.

A flash of heat ignited inside me while my heart and mind replayed the night. Of all the women I'd been with; of all the times I'd had sex, it'd _never_ been the way it was a few hours ago. _Never_ had I felt the overwhelming need and the fulfillment, the purity of the act the way I'd just felt it with Bella. I'd _made love_ to her; pure, sweet, mind-blowing, life-altering, all-consuming love. With every kiss, with every touch, it went beyond the physical – which was fucking amazing by the way. It was an emotional connection beyond anything I'd ever experienced, anything I'd ever _expected_. Yeah, sure I'd heard people say how sex was different when you did it with someone you loved. But _Holy Jesus_, I'd _never_ thought- I'd never imagined it could be like that! Like fitting yourself into a puzzle made only for you.

Afterwards, we'd fallen asleep by the fire. And then I'd woken and felt like a right old dick. Had she _really_ been ready for this? I mean, she'd said it was what she wanted - more than once - but she'd been so upset when I'd found her outside my door. What if this had just been an impulsive decision? What if she woke up regretting this? Fuck, it would kill me to see that regret in her eyes. Hesitancy was one thing, but _regret_…

I'd carried her carefully back to my bed to make her more comfortable, praying that when she woke, the uncertainty that had colored her eyes earlier hadn't been replaced by remorse now. Shit, I'd fucked up royally earlier in the night, and now, to make matters worse, I'd given in to the horny bastard in me. Could she ever forgive me for this?

I hadn't had to wait long to find out. Her eyes had fluttered open as soon as her head hit the pillow and, before I could say anything, I'd looked in her eyes. There was nothing hesitant or remorseful in them. In fact, her eyes were dark and hooded and determined, and sleep seemed to be the last thing on her mind. Being a horny bastard appeared to be one thing I wouldn't have to apologize for tonight. Good thing, because if she was willing, I planned to be a horny bastard a few more times before the night was over.

She didn't say anything though. Her intentions were spelled out in the way her dark eyes smoldered, in the way she grabbed my shoulders and guided me on top of her, in the way she wrapped her legs around me, digging her heels into my back. And when I turned us over so that she lay on top of me, it was in the way she took me inside her, unreserved, uninhibited. She knew now, that I was hers just as much as she was mine.

I sighed deeply, her facial expressions, her cries; her warmth, all replaying themselves behind my closed eyelids. My chest rose and fell heavily, and the movement stirred the sleeping beauty currently nestled deep into my chest. Slowly she lifted her groggy head, giving me a lazy smile when her eyes met mine.

"What time is it?" she murmured, her voice unintentionally rough and sexy.

"It's five," I answered, stroking her bare back languidly. "I was going to wake you in a few."

She arched an eyebrow. "Ready for round four?"

_Oh yeah_. Unreserved Bella was like Christmas, Hanukah and Kwanzaa all rolled into one.

And that was all it took to wake up my sleeping friend – or rather, _our_ sleeping friend – down south, and remind him that Bella lay just a few centimeters to the north of him, that her soft breasts were molding themselves perfectly against my chest, that her smooth hips and thighs were leaving a burning trail of need with every unintentional shift against mine, and that all it would take would be a slight adjustment of a few degrees for our hips to line up _just right_…

But it was five a.m., and between us getting ready and midtown early morning traffic…

"While the answer to that will _always_ be yes" – I smirked, tracing her lips with one finger – "I know you wanted to get back to Brooklyn before Maddie woke up…"

She kissed my finger with a sheepish smile. "Yeah, you're right. I guess we'd better get going."

I sighed heavily, tightening my arms around her despite my sensible words. She lowered her head back over my chest, sighing deeply herself and running her hands smoothly up and down my arms, tracing each tendon with her fingers while rubbing her toes against my legs.

"I wish we could just freeze time right now," she whispered, the vibrations from her words tickling the space just above her lips and sending a flashing flame radiating throughout my rib cage.

"I know. Me too," I breathed into her hair, feeling her shudder over me.

"Thank you...for a beautiful, perfect night."

I brought a hand to her chin to lift her face to me. "Thank _you. _Last night was…without a doubt…the most special …most fantastic…most _satisfying_ night of my life," I chuckled sincerely. She kissed my chest softly, and I could feel the heat of her blush through her lips. "Thank you for trusting me, for believing in us. And for telling me how you really feel, and what you've been thinking."

Between sleeping and lovemaking, we'd fit some heart to heart in there too. Bella had opened up to me more; told me, sometimes hesitantly, more about what she'd gone through with Paul; things he'd done and things he'd said. It made me realize that although I'd already known he'd made it hard for her to be able to trust men again, he'd done much more than that. He'd stripped her of her faith in _herself._ It fucking killed me to know that. But now I understood better why she'd reacted the way she had the past few days. God, I wanted to find her ex-husband and fucking mutilate him. But Bella didn't need me to kill Paul for her right now; though that could definitely be arranged in the future. She needed me to listen; to listen and hold her and reassure her that she would never go through that again.

She lowered her eyes, her long eyelashes fluttering against my chest.

"I'm sorry I've been so-"

"Hey," I said, waiting for her eyes to come back up to mine. "No more apologies, remember?"

Although I couldn't deny my relief that Jacob knew about us now, I did feel like an ass about the way I'd gone about it. I'd acted out of pure jealousy and resentment and anger, without any thought to how it would affect Bella when she went to Washington in a couple of days. Now I felt like shit, because I'd just made things harder for _her._ I'd tried apologizing again, but she hadn't let me. She'd said we'd both said and done things out of anger and frustration, and now it was time to put that behind us and deal with what was ahead of us.

She smiled softly and nodded. "Yeah, you're right. I remember."

"Good. As long as you remember that, and the fact that you are the most beautiful, amazing and downright hot-as-all hell woman I've ever met, then we're golden."

This time I saw her cheeks flame red, and I couldn't resist running one finger up and down her cheek.

She bit her lip. "I'll try, but sometimes… even though I know it here" – she rested one hand between both of our hearts – "it's hard to remember it here" – she moved her hand from between our hearts and tapped her temple.

It made my chest ache to hear that; that some part of her could _still_ question what she meant to me, but at least now I understood, and at least now she was willing to admit it to me, instead of keeping it all inside. _'Tell me everything,_' I'd told her, _'Don't hold anything in,'_ and she'd promised to try. It was all I could ask for. A night of cataclysmic lovemaking hadn't made me delusional; I knew Bella and I still had things to work out.

"Come here," I said roughly, pulling her up so that her face was right over mine. Her chocolate eyes burned into me, her breathing sped up. I cupped her face between my hands.

"I'll be here to remind you then." I pulled her mouth down to mine, kissing her softly once, twice. "Always. In any way you need me to." I let the truth of my words show in my eyes, gazing at her intently before kissing her again, this time more hungrily, parting her lips with my tongue and tasting her sweetness and her own hunger. After a few moments, Bella pulled away with a gasp, breathless, a half-smile on her flushed face.

"I'm going to hold you to that," she smiled coyly, and before I could pull her down again, she pulled the sheet with her and wrapped herself in it, climbing off of me and the bed. The loss of her body heat hit me hard and I sat up frowning.

"But right now, we have to go," she said cheekily.

It took an overwhelming amount of superhuman strength not to pull her back down and keep her in my bed forever, or for the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours at least. But we had a sleeping little girl waiting for us back in Brooklyn that would probably wonder where her mommy had disappeared to overnight if she woke up and Bella was gone. And neither of us wanted to risk scaring her that way.

"I'll just jump in the shower quickly," she called out on her way to the bathroom. I groaned loudly and flung myself back on the bed.

The sound of the water running in the bathroom reminded me that, just a few hours ago, I'd been at Bella's place feeling angry, confused and frustrated - yet still managing to picture her naked in the shower. I snorted, scratching my stomach lazily. _Horny bastard indeed_.

But a lot had changed in a few short hours. She'd given herself to me completely, opened her heart and soul to me, and shown me that there was _way more_ to physically being with someone than I'd ever imagined.

And now I was hooked. And I needed a fix.

Again.

_Right now_.

In a heartbeat I was at the bathroom door, throwing it open. The sight of Bella silhouetted through the foggy shower door - her curvy body arched as she lifted her arms to run her hands through her hair – did away with any semblance of restraint I may have been trying to maintain. And who was I kidding here anyway? I hadn't _really_ been trying _that_ hard.

I opened the shower door, mesmerized by the sight of her, all wet and moist and smiling and…_fuck_…waiting for me.

No surprise framed her features. "Edward," she breathed roguishly, soaping herself up. White clouds of hot steam rose and swirled around her. She arched an eyebrow. "Is there something I can do for you?"

_So fucking hot_. "You mentioned a fourth round?" I murmured roughly, before lifting her up and pushing her against the marble tiles and wrapping her legs around me.

OOOOOOOOOO

Alice lay bundled under a couple of heavy blankets on Bella's sofa. I smirked at the sight of her while Bella went to nudge her quietly.

"Alice we're home," she whispered softly.

Alice peeked out from under the covers, half opening her eyes. "What? Huh?" she asked groggily. Her eyes moved sleepily from Bella, then to me behind her. "Oh. Okay," she said, muttering a few other unintelligible words before turning over and resettling herself.

I snorted. "She sleeps like the dead," I informed Bella.

Bella chuckled. "I'll go get ready for work." Her eyes flashed suggestively to me as she made her way into her bedroom.

Jesus, I'd created a monster.

"I'm sorry love," I chuckled, "but I need to get me some protein before we go another round. I think I'll cook up some bacon and eggs, maybe throw in a couple of steaks in there for good measure."

"Eewpleasetoomuchinformation," Alice groaned flatly from the sofa. She muttered some more unintelligible gibberish before taking up her light snores again. I rolled my eyes and made my way to the kitchen. I wasn't kidding when I said I needed protein. If Bella was ready for round five, there was no way in hell I was going to be caught unprepared.

Maddie woke up just as I was finishing up with breakfast, and Bella called her into her room to dress her. A few minutes later, both of them dressed and ready, we sat for a quick breakfast. I smiled across the table at both of my girls, reaching out for Bella's hand and rumpling Maddie's hair with my other hand. She looked over at me happily, telling me about what she'd dreamt overnight, what she was going to play with Juliana that day, how much fun she was going to have on the 'aeuhplane' the next night…

My heart clenched tightly in my chest. _I just knew_ there was no other way in the world I'd ever rather start out my day, than waking with Bella in my arms, and having breakfast and listening to Maddie's stories in the morning. Someday, and hopefully someday soon, I'd have to work out a way to make it all permanent.

I looked over at Bella then. She was radiant, her cheeks rosy and glowing; her eyes sparkling like dark jewels. I chuckled, wondering if I glowed the way she did.

That question was answered when Alice finally woke up as we were clearing the table. She marched groggily into the kitchen, her eyes widening as she looked from Bella, then to me. She smiled broadly.

"Boy, looks like you two made up with a _vengeance,_" she stressed.

OOOOOOOOOO

After dropping Maddie off at Sue's and Alice at home, Bella and I drove into the City. I parked the car in the usual parking lot across the street from the office, and walked around to get the door for Bella. This was where we usually parted in the mornings, and met in the afternoons.

I bent my head down to Bella. "I'll see you upstairs in a few," I said, before kissing her.

Bella placed her hand on my chest, stopping me. I raised an eyebrow.

"Edward…we don't have to say goodbye here."

I gave her a questioning look.

"What I mean is…we don't have to keep this a secret anymore."

Her expression was honest, but now that I knew what to look for, I could see the remnants of anxiety still in her eyes. I sighed and pulled her into my arms.

"Bella, you don't have to keep trying to prove things to me."

"I'm not Edward-"

"Listen to me Bella," I said firmly, pulling back so that I could meet her eyes. "I can't say I agree with what you said yesterday" – it was insane for her to believe that she somehow didn't measure up. But it was how she felt, and I wasn't going to ignore it – "but I understand it's something that makes you feel uncomfortable."

"Edward-,"

I put two fingers over her lips.

"And until you feel completely comfortable, we don't have to do anything you're not ready for."

She bit her lip quietly.

"_Talk_ to me Bella," I said firmly again.

"I…I just don't want you to think it's because I have any doubts about _us_."

I gazed at her for a few moments before pulling her into my arms again and kissing the top of her head. I sighed into her hair.

"Bella, it hurts me to see you doubt _yourself _as much as it hurts for you to doubt _us_."

I brought her chin up with my thumb and forefinger. "You're beautiful baby. Inside _and_ out. And when you're ready, the world _is_ going to see that as clearly as I do."

She gazed into my eyes, a soft smile spreading across her lips. "I love you Edward."

"I love you too," I confirmed. "And don't forget who said it first."

She smirked and smacked my arm.

The morning passed quickly. Thanksgiving was two days away and everyone in the office was anxious and eager to get through the next couple of days. I seemed to be the only one dreading the passing of the next forty eight hours or so. Although Bella and I had worked out some of our problems, the thought of her and Maddie being away from me for four days still made me anxious. And now I kept vacillating between congratulating myself and wondering if I'd just made things worse yesterday by telling Jake about us. He was sure to be pissed now when Bella arrived in Forks, and I could only imagine the shit he'd be saying to her. My hands involuntarily tightened into fists at the thought of her having to deal with his bullshit without me.

Later that afternoon, while I was typing out an email, Angela conferenced me.

"Edward, Bella Swan wants to talk to you. Should I send her in?" The tone in Angela's voice was slightly teasing. She wasn't a stupid woman, but she was loyal as all hell. I sat back in my chair, slightly startled. Bella rarely sought me out in the office.

"Yes, please Ange. Send her in."

I straightened my tie and walked around to the other side of my desk to meet her. She walked in smiling and closed the door behind her. For a split second I let myself hope that last night was just the beginning of twenty-four hours of all my fantasies coming true. I raised an eyebrow as she walked closer.

She smirked and shook her head. "You are incorrigible."

"A man can dream right?"

She snorted and shook her head again. "I…wanted to ask you something, non work-related, but it really couldn't wait."

"Non work-related questions are the best. Go ahead."

She bit her lip. I leaned against my desk and waited, her eyes nervously on mine.

"Well…remember how I told you I spoke to my dad last night? After you left?"

I nodded curiously. From what I'd gathered, Bella and her dad had had some sort of heart-to-heart that had made her 'see things a bit more clearly.' All I knew was that I was somehow indebted to Chief Swan for the most passionate make up session of my lifetime, and I was pretty sure that whatever he'd said to her, _that_ hadn't exactly been his intention.

"Well, I called him a little while ago…to let him know Maddie and me's flight information…" She stopped and bit her lip again.

Now _I_ was fucking nervous. Obviously, her father's advice meant a lot to Bella. Had he told her something that had her rethinking last night? Rethinking us?

With my pulse increasing, I stretched out an arm and grabbed Bella's hand, squeezing it tightly inside mine.

"Go on Bella," I said evenly.

"He asked me…" - she watched me carefully, before finally sighing and blurting out – "He asked how many people he should expect to pick up tomorrow night."

I jerked my head back in surprise as soon as I understood the meaning of her words. I certainly hadn't been expecting _that_.

Bella continued quickly. "I mean, I know that you've got plans with your own family, and that its extremely last minute, and I wouldn't expect you to change your plans. But I just wanted you to know that if, you know, you wanted to, you'd be more than welcome and-"

I reached out and took her other hand, tightening my hold on both of them. She stopped her rambling right away.

"Bella, if I ask you a couple of things, do you promise to answer honestly?"

She nodded slowly, cautiously.

"Why didn't you ask me to go to Forks with you before?"

She shrugged sheepishly. "Well, because they didn't know about us Edward, and it would've been sort of awkward to show up with you like that."

I nodded thoughtfully.

"And why are you inviting me now?"

She frowned in confusion. "I'm inviting you because I want you there," she answered firmly, gripping my hands harder.

"Why?" I was probably being an ass, but I had to know that she really wanted me there, not that she was just saying what she thought I wanted to hear.

"Why do I want you there?" she asked, perplexed by my question. She threw her head back and stared at the ceiling for a few moments. Then she sighed and looked back at me.

"Okay, maybe I did this wrong. I'm inviting you to come to Washington with me Edward, because I want to spend Thanksgiving with you. Because I want you to meet my father and…Jake even. Things will probably be…awkward, I won't lie to you about that. But I want them to get to know you. The real you. Not the one that's been portrayed in the media. It's important to me that they know who you really are. Of course, I understand that you've made plans with your family, and…I'll understand completely if you can't come. But my dad's okay with it, and I just wanted you to know that. And I-"

She was rambling again.

"Tomorrow night's the busiest travel day of the year Bella," I reminded her through raised eyebrows. "The paparazzi 'll be all over the airport."

"I realize that Edward. And I'm ready. I was trying to tell you that this morning. Yes, it makes me nervous, I'm not going to deny it, but…" – she breathed in deeply – "its time, and as long as you're with me…"

We stared at each other for a long time.

She looked away and shook her head. "Look, I just wanted you to know that…Maddie and I would've loved for you to have come, but I understand. I know I didn't exactly handle the big reveal about you to my family with much grace, and now I've-"

Screw her office rules. I pulled her against me, reveling in the feel of her quickened heartbeat against mine. She hesitated for just a split second before wrapping her arms around my waist tightly. I kissed the top of her head and brought my mouth to her ear.

"I have one more question," I whispered.

"What?" she breathed shakily.

"Do we have to fly coach?"

She pulled away slowly and looked at me, her mouth turning up in a smirk when she caught sight of my twitching lips. I chuckled and she swatted my playfully.

"I guess I have some packing to do tonight."

"Really?" she asked with a wide grin. The undisguised joy in her voice made my chest swell.

"Really. Bella there is nowhere I'd rather spend Thanksgiving than with you and Maddie." She searched my eyes, and seeing the sincerity in them, her face beamed.

"So call your dad back and tell him there'll be one more place to set at the table."

After Bella left my office, I called my mother's cell phone to let her know I'd be missing Thanksgiving dinner this year. I did feel slightly guilty giving my regrets at the last minute; my mother took great pride in her holiday dinners for the family – they always involved a lot of planning and preparation. And with my dad and I getting along better lately, this year's dinner would've probably been more enjoyable to everyone involved.

"Hey mom," I said guiltily as soon as she answered her phone. I cringed at the sorry tone of my voice.

"Edward honey," she said softly, "I was going to call you in a little while. I wanted to remind you to bring some of those pastries for Thanksgiving dinner? You know, the ones from that bakery on Madison and-"

My guilt grew exponentially.

"Mom," I interrupted her, "I'm calling about Thanksgiving dinner." She was quiet. "I don't think I'll be able to make it."

She was silent again.

"May I ask why not?"

"I'm going to Washington with Bella and Maddie."

Again, there were a few moments of silence, and then in the background, loud laughter erupted.

"Ugh, fine Alice" - my mother spoke away from the phone – "You win. Just tell me what color you want the scarf in. I'll pick it up Friday while I'm doing my Christmas shopping."

I frowned.

"Mom? What's going on?"

"I'm sorry Edward," she chuckled, "I was just settling something with Alice."

"Alice? What are you settling with Alice?"

Esme sighed. "She said you'd be going to Washington with Bella."

"What? How would Alice know that? I just worked it out with Bella!"

"How does Alice know anything honey? She just does. You know that."

I smirked.

"Anyway, I'm really sorry mom. I know it's last minute, and I would've loved to have been with you guys this year, but-"

"Oh we're still having Thanksgiving dinner together this year honey."

I frowned again. "Mom, I'll be in Washington. On Thursday. Thanksgiving day. With Bella and Maddie."

"I know that Edward. That's why Thanksgiving dinner is tonight."

"What? Tonight?"

Esme chuckled lightly. "Yes, tonight." She sighed, as if amused by my confusion. Esme was a lot like Alice in that way. Or vice versa. "You see, your sister called me early this morning and told me that you and Bella had…how can I put this delicately?...had an interesting night?"

"You're kidding me right?" I muttered, dropping my head into one hand.

"Edward my love, don't be embarrassed," Esme tittered gracefully. "That's nothing to be shy about. I'm a modern mom. I understand that you and Bella are both young, vibrant adults, and I'm _hardly _surprised to hear you're sexually-"

"Alright mom! Alright!" I interrupted, pulling the phone away from me before my brain exploded.

"Anyway," Esme continued undeterred, "Alice figured after last night…well, you two probably wouldn't want to be separated anytime in the near future, and honestly I agreed with her. I only took the bet for the heck of it." She spoke away from the phone again. "I would've bought you that Burberry scarf anyway Alice."

"Sure mom, sure," I heard Alice giggle in the background.

"So I drove here to Alice's this morning," Esme said, turning back to the phone, "and we've got the turkey in the oven and we're working on the sides now. But I'm afraid we've run out of time to make any desserts," she sighed. "So do you think you'll be able to bring those pastries?"

I lowered my head down to my desk and chuckled. There were very few secrets or surprises in the Cullen Clan.

OOOOOOOOOO

I hung up and called Bella, letting her know about the plans for tonight. She took the whole thing with Alice and my mom much more in stride than I had. We reworked our plans for the evening and settled it that Bella would go straight to Brooklyn and pick up Maddie and then head to Alice's, while I'd go home and pack and then meet up with them at my sister's loft.

A few minutes after hanging up with Bella, Emmett and Jasper called to let me know they'd gotten similar calls from Alice and Esme. Thanksgiving would be arriving a couple of days early for the Cullens.

Back at home I packed quickly and hitched a ride back to Brooklyn with Rose and Emmett. Their lips twitched in amusement every time they'd glance at me through the rear view mirror. I could pretty much figure what that was about, and was pretty surprised that they for once had the self-control to keep their comments to themselves.

When we finally arrived at Alice's that evening, my eyes almost popped out of their sockets when Bella came to meet me at the door. I mean, Bella always looked so friggin' good to me, whether she was wearing her pretty office skirts and blouses, or her comfy sweats at home, or her jeans and tees on weekends; she had the kind of figure that looked good no matter what it was in. And shit, even better when it was in absolutely nothing.

But tonight she was wearing a strapless blue dress that hugged her curves perfectly and that exposed _just_ the right amount of skin on top. The dress fell just above her knees and had a slit to the side that went halfway up her thigh, once again exposing just enough leg without giving away the goods. She looked sexy as all hell without looking inappropriate for a family dinner. The blue tone of the dress complemented her creamy complexion perfectly, and her black peep toe heels were higher than the ones she usually wore to work and gave her calves a sexy curvature. Her hair was up in a loose bun, with a few stray pieces of hair falling softly all around. And her lips. _Jesus_. She was wearing the same red lipstick she'd worn for Jasper's birthday party a few months back, when I'd admitted defeat at my effort to stay away from her. She looked so heartbreakingly beautiful it took me a few moments to speak, and when I did I breathed out,

"Perfect," letting my eyes wander appreciatively up and down her body. She turned me on so fucking much, there was no reason for me to hide it. And when my eyes wandered so did my mind, remembering that just a few hours ago that body had been tangled with mine. She blushed prettily and closed the gap between us, winding her arms around my neck and kissing me squarely with those luscious red lips.

"Mmm. And you taste as good as you look," I said, lightly sucking on her bottom lip. She giggled and looked up at me, pulling back to let her eyes trail up and down slowly over me. And fuck if that wasn't a hell of a turn on too.

"You look pretty tasty there yourself, Mr. Cullen," she smiled suggestively, wiping my mouth with one finger before adjusting my tie carefully. I'd changed into a more casual suit for tonight's dinner, and was proud to see it complemented Bella's dress perfectly. We fit together like two pieces of a puzzle again – although with clothes on this time.

I smiled smugly and pulled her mouth against mine once again. She melted into me instantly. After a few moments, she pulled back breathlessly.

"Come on, we'd better get into the dining room. We can continue this later…" she said with half-lidded eyes.

The heavens opened up and the choirs of angels started singing.

She took my hand and tugged me towards the dining room, where I could hear everyone else's voices laughing and talking loudly as they finished preparing the table. But I stood my ground, waiting for Bella to turn and face me again.

"Maddie's saving you a seat next to her; she won't let anyone else near it. Jasper keeps teasing her and telling her he's going to…" She stopped suddenly when she realized I wasn't moving, and turned to me with a confused smile.

"What?" she asked.

"I have something for you."

She tilted her head questioningly.

"Close your eyes."

"Edward-"

"Go ahead."

She narrowed her eyes questioningly, then closed them.

I put my hand inside my pants pocket and pulled out the small earrings, removing the backs and gently placing them inside Bella's pierced ears.

"Edward what-" she asked with a bemused chuckle.

"Shh, just hold on a moment," I whispered, pulling the delicate necklace out of my other pocket and carefully unclasping it.

"Turn around," I instructed. She bit her lip but did as she was told, facing away from me. And just as I'd imagined myself doing the first time I'd seen this necklace, I placed it around Bella's smooth, creamy neck, placing my hands on her hips and lowering my head to place a soft kiss right under the clasp once I was done. And just as I'd fantasized, I felt a shiver run down her back, and she instinctively threw her back against me. I showered a few more kisses along her back and shoulders, trailing one hand over her arm until I reached her hand, and then entwined our fingers.

"Come on," I murmured in her ear, leading her to a large mirror against the wall.

She gasped, her chocolate eyes growing wide in amazement as her hand moved to touch one earring and then the other, before trailing slowly to her neck and running it over the sapphire and diamond necklace. I stood directly behind her, placing my hands on her hips again.

"Edward," she said, shocked eyes on the jewelry pieces through the mirror, "Edward I can't possibly-"

"Before you say you can't accept them, let me just say something."

She nodded.

"Bella I've been wanting to give these to you since the second I bought them. I know Bella, that you have a hard time accepting gifts. And you can give them back if you want to. I swear, I won't be offended. Like I told you earlier, I don't want you to do anything you don't want to, and that includes accepting gifts that make you uncomfortable. But they're yours Bella." I gently held her earlobe between two fingers before trailing them down her neck to the edges of the necklace, around her creamy collarbone, feeling a scattering of goose bumps rise along her flesh. "Whether you accept them tonight, or a month from now, or a year or a decade from now, they're yours. I brought them with me just in case, and then I thought about it in the car and decided maybe now wouldn't be the right time to give them to you. I don't want you to think last night has anything to do with this," I assured her. "But when I saw you now, you look so beautiful, so perfect. And that blue dress," – I let my eyes travel up and down her body again through the mirror – "God, you just have no idea how heartbreakingly beautiful you are, do you?" She looked down bashfully. I turned her around to face me.

"The truth is Bella, whether we talk about it or not, I'm in a position where I _can_…spoil you a little bit," – well, a lot a bit, but I'd have to start small - "and I don't want to have to apologize for that, or hold back completely, because I _dream_ of spoiling you _and_ Maddie. You're my _girls_. And it's not a matter of me trying to change you, or make you into something you're not," I murmured, meeting her eyes so that she could see the truth, "But these sapphires were made for you Bella. Look at yourself. They were made for _you._"

I turned her back towards the mirror so she could look at herself. Her hands flitted back and forth between the earrings and the necklace.

"They're beautiful," she murmured, her chest rising and falling with her breaths as she just stood there, staring, thinking.

She finally turned to face me again, looking up at me through her dark eyelashes. "Can I…think about it?"

Good enough. I nodded. "Of course," I grinned. "But will you wear them tonight?" I asked hopefully.

She smiled slowly and nodded.

"Thank you," she said genuinely.

"Thank _you._"

I smiled crookedly and kissed her, letting my hands wander to the perfectly round bottom that looked so damned tempting in that dress, until the sound of clicking little shoes running our way brought them quickly back up to Bella's waist. I pulled away from her lips to see Maddie racing towards us. By now, I felt no discomfort in letting her see me holding her mother. Quickly, she reached us and launched herself into my arms. She looked adorable in her pretty caramel velvet dress and a matching ribbon in her hair.

"Edwood, you-uh heuh!" she cried happily, winding her little arms tightly around my neck. I kissed her cheek loudly.

"Aren't you a beautiful princess tonight?"

She giggled happily.

"Uncoe Jaspuh said if you din't get heuh soon he was gonna take you-uh seat, but I told him you'd be heuh soon and I- Ooh mommy, what a pwetty necklace! It's so spawkly and blue! Can I have one like that too? Edwood mommy says you-uh comin' to see grampa and Uncoe Jake with us. Is that twue? Is it Edwood, is it?"

I chuckled and kissed the top of her head. "Yes, princess. It's true. I'm coming to see grandpa and…Uncle Jake with you."

"Yay!" she cried, throwing her little hands in the air. "Now you can come fishing with us! But mommy will prolly stay home, she doesn't like fishing. So you, me, grampa and uncoe Jake can go!" she finished happily. I smiled and nodded, lacking the heart to tell her that at this point if her uncle Jake and me ended up on a fishing boat together one of us would end up _sleeping with the fishes_.

The three of us made our way into the dining room, hand in hand. It was already one friggin' perfect Thanksgiving.

OOOOOOOOOO

Were it not for the date on the calendar, it would've been your typical family Thanksgiving Dinner. I had to hand it to my mother and Alice; they'd pulled everything off perfectly; from the turkey, to the delicious sides with Esme's signature touches. Conversation flowed freely, wine and beer flowed freely and by the end of dinner we were all flowing pretty freely. Even Carlisle's fair complexion was flushed by the end of dinner. He grinned at me widely from across the table, holding up a wine glass and probably toasting to the fact that he wouldn't have to give me the Turkey Day version of his 'grow up' speech this year.

Bella kept apologizing about having moved everyone's Thanksgiving up by two days by taking me away, which made Alice burst out laughing – the bottle of wine she nursed under her arm probably had something to do with how funny she was finding everything. My parents kept assuring Bella that she hadn't ruined anything, in fact, she'd made this year's celebration the best one yet, to which I wholeheartedly agreed – with another toast of wine.

We all pitched in with the clean up after dinner, and once everyone was comfortably settled in the living room, Emmett stood up in front of the fireplace and said he had an announcement. Bella made her way to my side with Maddie, and Maddie settled herself on my lap. I kissed the top of her head and took Bella's hand, waiting curiously for the announcement.

Rosalie quickly stood up and made her way to her husband's side, and before Emmett even spoke the words, it all clicked in my head. Honestly, I felt like kicking myself for not having caught on sooner. Why Rose had been an even bigger witch than usual lately, why she kept eating like she expected the apocalypse to hit tomorrow, why her breasts suddenly looked like a pair of summer melons, and why she shockingly hadn't had a sip of wine or beer all night.

"No friggin' way!" I yelled - grinning furiously from ear to ear – before either one had even said anything. My voice may have been a bit louder than I'd realized because Bella laughed and shushed me.

"Yup!" Emmett confirmed heartily, throwing his big arm around his wife's shoulder. "I've impregnated my Rosie here with the seed from my loins!"

Definitely not the smartest words to come out of his mouth.

"Impregnated me with the seed of your loins? We're making the biggest announcement we'll probably ever make and that's how you word it? You've impregnated me with the seed of your loins?"

Emmett was smart enough to stay shut.

Rose swatted him over the head and he quickly pulled her into him, kissing her passionately.

And then everyone was laughing and hooting and congratulating them. We all got up to hug Rose and give Emmett a congratulatory punch in the ribs.

"Edwood, what's impwegnated mean?" Maddie asked, from where I held her while we waited our turn.

I almost dropped her.

Panicked, I whipped my head towards Bella for help. Unfortunately, she and Alice were doubled-over fighting fits of laughter at the terror-stricken look on my face. The fact that they'd both been sharing a bottle of wine for the past hour probably had something to do with Bella's lack of concern over her four-year-olds current inquiry.

"Uh," – I cleared my throat nervously – "It means uncle Emmett and aunt Rose are going to have a baby." There. That wasn't so hard.

"Where do babies come from?"

Fuck. No.

"Uhm, well you see Maddie, when a man and a woman meet and fall in love-"

"Hold on, hold on!" Bella cried, straightening herself up and clutching at my side tightly. She took Maddie from my arms, and for once, I had to admit I was relieved.

"Maddie honey, babies are a gift from heaven. They come from up there," she said, pointing up with her forefinger, "when a mommy and daddy are ready for a baby."

Maddie looked thoughtful for a few seconds. "Okay," she simply said.

I breathed a deep sigh of relief.

OOOOOOOOOO

Apparently, it was a night for announcements. A short while after we'd finished congratulating the parents-to-be, Alice and Jasper went to stand in front of the fireplace.

"Alright," Alice giggled. "I think we've given Emmett and Rosalie enough time with their announcement. Now it's our turn!"

"Little sis, don't tell me you're knocked up too?" Emmett hollered loudly, which earned him a punch in the arm from his wife.

I glanced over at Maddie, but she was busy playing with her dolls and wasn't paying attention to the grown-ups anymore.

"Nope, no shotgun wedding here!" Alice laughed back. "But…we _have_ finally settled on a date for the wedding! Make sure you all clear your calendars for June 18th of next year!"

Again, we all hollered and hooted, and got up for more hugs and friendly punches.

"Bella and Rose," Alice called out, "You two better get ready for some serious bridesmaiding, 'cause I intend to fully embrace my inner bridezilla!"

"Damn it Alice!" Rose complained. "I'll have just given birth by then! I'm gonna look like a friggin' whale next to you and Bella!"

"Well the bridesmaids aren't supposed to upstage the bride," she shrugged unapologetically. "Besides, after I pick the color and fabric, I'm letting you two pick the style of your dresses."

"Hurrah," Bella muttered from where she sat sideways on my lap. I pulled her closer to me encouragingly. And while I'd fully meant it to be for comforting purposes only, the angle she was in gave me a great view of the creamy skin just above the bust-line of her dress. For the love of God would these family expositions ever end so that I could get Bella home and have her expose _herself_ to me?

"Can I finish my announcement before you start exposing Bella?" Alice asked dryly.

Had I said that out loud?

Bella hid her face against my neck, a red blush appearing over her face, down to her shoulders and creeping down the bust-line I'd just been admiring. Yup, I had said that out loud.

"Sorry love," I chuckled, nudging her face with my nose. "One too many," I explained. The slow smile spreading across her face let me know I was forgiven.

Alice shot me a dirty look and continued.

"Edward, you and Emmett will of course be partnered with your respective halves," – I smiled widely at the way Alice had phrased _that_ - "And where's my little ballerina?" Alice asked, searching the room.

Maddie's head shot up. "Heuh I am!"

"Are you ready to be my flower girl?"

"What's a flowuh girl?"

"It means you dress up like a princess and throw flower petals in front of me when I get married. How 'bout it? You wanna do that for me?" Alice asked sweetly.

"Shuah I would Aunt Ally!"

Everyone laughed. I looked down at Bella's face, where her head rested on my shoulder. Her eyes glistened happily.

OOOOOOOOOO

Rosalie approached me by the door while Bella and Maddie finished saying their goodbyes to the rest of the family.

I grinned, feeling really happy for her. I knew she and my brother had been trying for a while to get pregnant. Tonight's announcements had left me wistful, pensive. I couldn't help picturing myself making the sorts of announcements Emmett and Jasper had made tonight, although with a bit of a twist. I imagined myself up there, not necessarily announcing a new baby on the way – thought that would definitely be glorious – but announcing that a little girl already in our midst was finally, officially mine.

I furrowed my brows, wondering what exactly the steps necessary for that would be, when Rose broke me out of my thoughts.

"Hard day?" she asked.

"You have no idea," I answered with a salacious grin and a wink.

"Ugh! Spare me," she snorted.

I chuckled. I was admittedly a bit buzzed.

"How many years have I had to listen to all the innuendos between you and your husband?"

She laughed. "Fine, fine. You'll be back Monday?"

I nodded.

"I wanted to talk to you, Emmett and Jasper about Bella."

I raised an eyebrow. "What about her?"

She smirked. "Chill out. It's nothing bad. It's just…" – she grinned and tilted her head to the side.

"Go on Rose."

"After the baby comes next year, I'm going to be out for a while. Emmett and I haven't completely decided yet, but we're thinking six months to a year."

"Okay," I said slowly. That made sense. I could definitely understand her wanting to be home with her baby for as long as possible. Hell, I could even understand her quitting altogether if she was so inclined. It wasn't as if Emmett couldn't afford to keep her home. Truth was neither he nor Alice nor myself really _had_ to work a day in our lives if we really didn't want to. But we did want to. And I knew Rose wanted to also. It was just how we were.

"Well, CCW will need someone to cover for me during that time; someone to step into my shoes, so to speak."

My eyes immediately trailed to Bella. She was hugging my mother tightly, while Maddie held on to her hand. My mom was saying something to Bella, and whatever it was, was making her smile and blush again. I sincerely hoped she wasn't giving her the 'I know you're both young vibrant adults' talk I'd gotten earlier.

"What do you think?" Rose asked.

"I think she'd be great," I said simply.

"Yes. So do I," Rose agreed, "but…she'd be directly under you at that point."

"I think I can handle that," I smiled crookedly; the slight buzz in my brain translating her words in a different way.

"Ugh, can you get your mind out of the gutter for five minutes please?" Rose sneered. "Right now, Bella works for me. So even though I'm sure there will be a few tongues wagging when you two come out, I'm still technically her boss. When she takes over for me, _there will be talk_, from CCW employees, from some of the clients-"

I chuckled. "I get it Rose," I said, placing my hand on her shoulder. "I know what you're saying. But we've got a few months for that. We'll figure it all out," I assured her.

She glared at me with twisted lips, but then her excitement took over and she simply chuckled. "Yeah, you're right. We'll work it out."

Bella, Maddie and Alice reached us then.

"You ready to go?" I asked Bella anxiously. That fucking dress was driving me insane. She nodded and I threw her coat around her quickly.

"Ding, ding, ding! Ladies and gentleman, let's get ready to rumble!" Alice chuckled under her breath as she helped Maddie with the buttons to her coat.

OOOOOOOOOO

Back at her place, Bella changed Maddie into her pajamas and quickly got her in bed. Tomorrow would be a long day.

She came out to where I waited in the living room, sitting quietly on the sofa. I felt unexplainably nervous and buzzed at the same time now. I wasn't sure what the protocol would be tonight.

Bella came and sat next to me, kicking her heels off one at a time. I watched them fly across the floor, wondering when and if the rest of the outfit would follow.

"I had a great time with your family tonight. That was really sweet of them to pull that off last minute so that you could spend Thanksgiving with them."

"They didn't do it just for me you know," I assured her. "They wanted to spend Thanksgiving with you and Maddie too."

She smiled, and then bit her lip. "I hope you're not too disappointed if my family's Thanksgiving isn't quite as…cheery."

I chuckled. "You mean it might be sort of awkward because of the beef between me and Jacob."

She screwed up her face. "Yeah…sort of."

I snorted and pulled her over to me, guiding her on my lap sideways. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and rested her head on my chest. Once again I was afforded a great view down her dress, but I tried to put that aside for now and concentrate on what we were discussing.

"Don't worry. I promise I'll be on my best behavior this time."

"Hmph," she grunted. "It's not you I'm worried about being on his best behavior. Jake's always been pretty…hot-headed. You see he hasn't even called me back since yesterday," she said in an annoyed tone.

I couldn't say I was sorry about that, so I said nothing at all.

"The thing is…" she said, "You and he are pretty similar in lots of ways."

I looked into her face and raised an eyebrow.

"What I mean is," she tried to explain, "you both have this protective streak, and you both feel this need to completely take care of those you care about. I just think…if you really got to know each other, you might even be friends," she said lightly.

"Hmm, maybe," I murmured, running my hand up and down her thigh. I didn't want to contradict her by reminding her that that same protective streak she claimed we shared was what would keep us from being friends. That and the fact that he thought I was taking something away from him that was rightfully his. No. I didn't see how Jake and I could ever be friends until he accepted that Bella was not his.

She lifted her head up and gazed at me intently.

"I just want him to see that I _am_ safe, that you _are_ good to me, and then maybe he'll understand, and he'll finally…"

I cupped her chin. "The problem is Bella," I said gently this time – as opposed to how I'd handled things last night – "_he_ wants to be the one to take care of you in every way."

She stared at me. "Maybe meeting you, seeing how happy Maddie and I are with you, will finally make him see that that's not possible."

"I hope so," I answered honestly.

She put her head back on my chest. Neither one of us said anything for a few minutes, as she gently stroked my leg and I stroked hers. I was just about to suggest we lose some clothes when she spoke again.

"I guess I should warn you about Charlie too," she laughed shortly.

"Maybe you should've issued all these warnings before I bought my ticket this afternoon," I teased. She smacked my upper thigh playfully, but all it did was remind me of how close her hand was to my buddy.

"I'm kidding," I assured her. "What should I know about Charlie now?"

"Well…Charlie doesn't say much, but he'll let you know whatever it is he wants you to know," she warned wryly. "That's all I've got to say about that."

Despite my teasing, I found myself actually feeling nervous now. What if Charlie hated me? Bella had told me he wasn't the type to listen to shit he read or heard in the media, partly because of the shit people had said about Bella after Paul had accused her of screwing around with Jake. But what if he already had this pre-conceived notion of who I was? What fucking good would it do for him to meet me?

Fuck. I ran my hand through my hair. What the fuck was I heading into?

"Hey, did I make you nervous now?" Bella asked, looking up at me and seeing the terror in my eyes. She chuckled and brought her hands up to weave them through my hair, instantly calming me.

"Relax," she whispered soothingly. "Charlie's gonna love you. Well, maybe not love you, but as long as you make his little girl happy…"

"Well then, I'd better make sure I get right on that," I whispered, lowering my head to the bust-line I'd been dying to lose myself in all night, and licking and kissing my way around it.

Bella started breathing heavily, her hands still in my hair. "I don't think that's what Chief Swan has in mind," she quivered.

"Do I?" I asked, snaking my hand under her skirt and letting it trail higher and higher. She let her eyes close. "Do I make you happy?"

Her eyes opened back up and she brought my head up, gazing at me from under her dark lashes, her eyes full of want. "You make me very, very happy," she answered. Then with an arched brow and an impish smile, she added, "In fact, you made me happy five times last night."

"Five times?" I asked with a smug grin. "By my count it was four." My hand reached the edge of her panties and she closed her eyes again, exhaling deeply. I could die happily gazing at that look of total abandon on her face.

"Do you…_ohh_…do you remember that time in the shower?" she asked shakily.

"Uh-huh," I answered, swallowing thickly while I pulled her panties down her hips. She lifted herself up to help me and brought her mouth to mine, tracing my lips with her tongue. One hand let go of my hair and came all the way down to cup me with determination before moving down to my zipper. I hissed into her mouth.

"Well…twice that time," she said.

God I loved this woman.

And that was enough talk about Forks and Jake and Charlie.

OOOOOOOOOO

The weather was unseasonably warm the next afternoon, the sun shining brightly overhead. The skies were clear as our cab took the right towards Terminal 3 of JFK International Airport. I turned around from the front seat to look at Bella, seated in the back with Maddie. She smiled confidently, and I breathed a sigh of relief. She _was_ ready for this. There was no doubt or hesitancy in her features. As our cabbie waited impatiently behind a long line of identical yellow cabs to release us at the passenger drop off, I pulled out our tickets from the inside pocket of my dark pea coat. Three first class seats on South West Airlines to Seattle-Tacoma International Airport.

I'd discovered last night that Bella was extremely receptive to suggestions while in the throes of ecstasy. The yes's just flew left and right at that point. I could've probably talked her into letting me charter a private jet to Washington if I'd wanted to. But it was a secret weapon I'd use carefully, only for the most urgent of instances; and flying first-class as opposed to coach certainly fell into that category.

The airport was packed, just as I'd known it would be. The cab finally reached the drop off area and I helped Bella and Maddie out before taking the luggage from the cabbie and paying him.

"Keep the change," I murmured distractedly, handing the luggage over at the front while my eyes scanned through the glass doors inside, looking for the paparazzi that would be hiding out all over the place, waiting to snap at anything remotely interesting.

Once the luggage was taken care of, I picked Maddie up and grabbed Bella's hand.

"You ready?" I asked her, raising my eyebrows. She knew I meant for more than just the flight.

She grinned, her cheeks flushing prettily. Once again I marveled at how fresh and beautiful and natural she was. She had nothing to fear.

Bella got on her tiptoes and gave me a quick kiss. "As long as you're with me, I'm ready for anything."

One half of my mouth twitched up automatically. I turned to the princess in my arm.

"Maddie princess, if I tell you to, just put your head down into my coat, okay?"

Bella and I had discussed it last night, and we both wanted to shield Maddie from what would definitely be extreme curiosity about her as much as possible. It would be impossible to expect that they'd never get a picture of her, but we wanted to limit them as much as we could.

Maddie shrugged nonchalantly. "Okay Edwood," she agreed easily.

We walked through the sliding glass doors, the excitement over the approaching holiday evident in the quickness of everyone's steps, in the booming of their voices, even in the robotic voice calling out flight information over the loudspeaker.

We made it past the ticketing counters, past Starbucks and McDonalds, heading towards Gate 25, when the first flash caught my eye, and I looked up to see a young guy down on one knee, a long black strap fastened to a camera around his neck, snapping away happily. I held Bella's hand tighter and pushed Maddie's head gently into my coat.

OOOOOOOOOO

**Thanksgiving Day:**

_**PAGE SIX**_

_November 25, 2010_

_Eddie C's Mystery Girl Revealed!_

_Here's a Thanksgiving feast for all you Eddie C. fans! New York City's hottest new mystery is one step closer to being solved this morning! Speculation around the turkey table tonight about who Eddie C's new flame is can now focus more on her name rather than her face, since the new happy couple were spotted at JFK yesterday evening boarding a flight to Washington. The pretty little brunette was easy to see this time as Eddie rushed her through the airport, holding her hand tightly. And if you think you see a little bundle wrapped up in his other arm, then you're right! Seems like Eddie's new girl comes with matching baggage. Looks like NYC's resident playboy has grown tired of tall and gorgeous and is trying on instant family for size! "He looked pretty anxious to keep the little girl covered," said one traveler, who saw the little group waiting for their flight at the gate. "Like a concerned dad, you might say." Really? Well, we'll all be waiting to see how __**this**__ works out!_

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**A/N: Reviews are almost as good as flying first class. Leave one.**


	25. Ch 24 Over the River & thru the Woods

**A/N: This was originally supposed to be one chapter, but of course, it grew. Therefore, there will be TWO POSTS THIS WEEK. I know we all want to see what happens with E and J.**

**This has not been betad, so please excuse any errors. My beta Danna0724 would've made this better. **

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

**Oh, and this week we'll still be in Edward's head.**

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**Chapter 24 – Over the River & Thru the Woods **

**Chapter Song Rec:**

_**Full Moon**_** – The Black Ghosts (from the Twilight Movie soundtrack)**.

**EPOV**

It was a balmy fifty degrees in New York, with clear skies and a setting sun when we left JFK. Twilight met us on the plane, the blue skies giving way to streaks of red, gold and orange all melting into each other like smears on a clean canvas. Maddie, seated between Bella and myself, stared out the small window, enchanted by the play of colors dancing in the sky, before complete darkness took over. With nothing more to see, she closed the window and turned to the personal TV screen in front of her and played video games for a little while, before switching to cartoons. Then she ate her Alaskan Salmon with wild rice, played around with her Crème Brulee, and finally, her little stomach full and her mind tired, fell asleep comfortably stretched out between us.

Five hours after taking off, the 737 made its descent into Seattle. At some point during the flight west, the clear skies had given way to darker, grayer clouds and a steady even rain greeted us from the large windows of the airport as we made our way to our connecting flight, to a small town north of Seattle called Port Angeles. Large drops pelted the plane's windows insistently. One hour later we were waiting for our bags to make their turn around the luggage carousel.

I'd been calm and relaxed throughout both flights, watching Maddie enjoy first class and then sleep comfortably, and talking to Bella. But once we'd gotten our luggage and she started waving wildly towards a dark haired, lightly bearded man of average height and build - in a police uniform - my pulse picked up like a horse at the race tracks.

"Dad!" she yelled, taking a few quick steps towards the man with a smile in his dark eyes and a steady expression on his face. She reached him and gave him a quick hug, which he returned with one arm. I walked towards them slowly, a sleeping Maddie in my arms.

"Welcome home Bells," he said evenly, but I detected an obvious note of contentment in his voice.

Bella took a step back and looked her dad over. "You look good Charlie."

He looked away from her, a tinge of red coloring his stubbly cheeks. "So do you," he returned quietly. His eyes traveled to where I stood behind Bella, holding his granddaughter.

Bella looked from her dad to me quickly. "Dad, this is Edward," she said in a slightly shaky voice. "Edward, this is my dad, Charlie Swan."

I stretched out my free hand to shake his. "Good to meet you sir."

He took my hand and gave it one firm shake, eyeing me like he was trying really hard not to face plant me on the floor and frisk me. My heart started thumping loudly in my chest. He had Bella's eyes, or rather, Bella had his, and just like the first time she'd looked at me, I got the feeling as if those eyes could see right through me. It was going to be a _looong_ weekend.

"Yeah, good to meet you too," he finally mumbled.

His eyes moved to the sleeping bundle in my arms, and just like that, his whole demeanor shifted. The scrutinizing expression was gone and his eyes lit up like a Christmas tree, transforming his entire face. Behind the beard, Charlie was still a young man, and now I could see the resemblance between him and his daughter.

"There's my granddaughter!" he practically hummed.

"She's asleep," I grinned quietly. "It was a long trip for her."

He ignored that bit of information and reached out his arms to grab on to her gently. I hesitated for a fraction of a second before loosening my grip and letting him take her from me, her limp little body transferring unawares between me and her grandpa. He held her away from him for two seconds to look at her, before guiding her head onto his shoulders.

"Hey Maddie Mo," he crooned. "Too tired to say hi to your grandpa?" She didn't even stir. He chuckled. "Aw that's alright. We've got all weekend to catch up."

He looked back up between Bella and me. "Got all your bags?"

"Yeah dad," Bella answered. I nodded.

"Alrighty then. Take care of those Edward, and let's get goin', we've got another hour ride ahead of us," he directed, turning around and heading towards the sliding glass doors.

Bella turned towards me and bent down to pick up one of the bags.

"Don't even think about touching that unless you want to get me shot," I hissed, picking up the bags and walking with her towards the doors.

She chuckled heartily. "Oh come on, it wasn't that bad. And anyway, he left his gun at home," she said with a crooked smile. We walked out of the airport together.

The hour ride to the rainy town of Forks was…slow, to say the least. Bella and her dad did some quick catching up for the first half or so of the car ride, some light info on the goings on of their friends; Sam and Emily had just had their second baby, Leah was thinking of going to Veterinary school, though she didn't want to leave her job at the garage, Seth was in his last year of college and dating some new girl up in a town called Hoquiam. The conversations were short and to the point and both seemed perfectly at ease with that.

"How's work?" Bella asked.

"It's work," he replied. "Drunk loggers, wild animals, speeding in the rain, the usual."

"You being careful?"

"Always am Bells."

Bella nodded. "Eating well?"

"As well as can be expected without you around," he smiled at her with a side-long glance. "But you know, Sue Clearwater brings me some stuff every few days."

Bella nodded again.

"Fish biting good for you?"

"Always do," he responded.

Then it was his turn.

"How's work for you?"

"Pretty good. I'm working on some interesting accounts."

"How's the apartment? That building super finally clear out that pipe for you?"

"Actually, Edward cleared it out for me."

Charlie's eyes moved to me from the rearview mirror, and suddenly I was remembering Emmett's euphemisms about clear pipes and Bella and me's activities from the last couple of nights. My face flamed as hot as a radiator, and this time I was _sure_ Charlie could see right through me. Yeah, I'd cleared out his daughter's pipe alright.

I thought I saw him smirk. "You good with plumbing?" Charlie asked.

"Uh, I can manage pretty well I suppose."

"Mmm," he muttered, looking straight ahead once again.

"Edward's pretty good at lots of things," Bella added, smiling at me and squeezing my hand.

Of course, Charlie's eyes trailed right back to me with that one.

"Yeah, I suppose they breed them pretty well-rounded over there," he said, his eyes digging into me. "My granddaughter tells me you fish?"

I glanced at Bella quickly, but she just shrugged, apparently as surprised as I was.

"Yes sir. My family has a yacht we like to take out pretty regularly." And then I felt like kicking myself at how fucking pompous that had sounded.

"Mmm," Charlie muttered again. "Well, I don't have a _yacht_ or anything, but I've got a small little boat that does the job well enough."

_Oh fuck_, I groaned to myself. _Way to earn brownie points Cullen, diss the man's boat_.

"Oh I didn't mean- I mean, I'm sure your little boat is just fine. I mean, the yacht's not even mine, it's my fathers."

Bella squeezed my hand tightly again. I looked over at her quickly and she shook her head infinitesimally, giving me an encouraging smile. I breathed in deeply and shut my mouth.

Charlie changed the subject.

"You being careful over there Bells?" he asked seriously. "Locking your door at night and everything?"

Bella sighed. "Yes Chief. I lock my doors at night."

"Now don't give me that tone. You know what the crime rate in Brooklyn is?"

"Charlie, it's not like we're living in a war zone," Bella replied dryly. "And you and Jake remind me pretty often of the crime rate in Brooklyn. Believe me, I haven't forgotten."

"Actually sir," I cut in, "the crime rate in Brooklyn is lower than the national average." I vaguely remembered Alice telling us all that after we gave her shit for moving to Brooklyn.

But apparently that was not what Charlie had wanted to hear. He glared at me through the rear-view. Yeah, I was pretty sure it was a glare.

"Actually Edward," he said in a measured tone, "if you take a closer look at those reported crime rates, you'll see that _property crime_ in Brooklyn is slightly lower than the national average. But _violent crimes_, which are the ones _I_ worry about, are higher than the national average."

Holy fucking shit. I was batting Oh for two here and we hadn't even reached Forks yet.

"Now I know you guys in advertising over there like to fudge with the facts," he continued, moving his eyes back to the windshield ahead, "but they are what they are. And believe me," he said, glancing at me once again, "I know my facts."

If the Earth opened up and swallowed me right then, I would've been more than grateful.

Bella gave her father a stern look.

"Dad, don't forget _I'm_ in advertising too, and we don't _fudge_ with the facts; at least not at CCW."

"Sir, I just meant to assure you that Bella and Maddie are safe. I would never let anything happen to them."

"Well, unfortunately _no one_ can completely guarantee that, so I'm sure you'll understand if I continue worrying."

"Of course. I mean, of course I can understand you worrying. I worry too when I'm not around." _Fuuuck me_, why couldn't I just shut the hell up?

"Hmm," he muttered again.

Bella, sensing my tenseness, slowly weaved her fingers between mine and squeezed harder still. And then in an effort to give me some breathing room, she turned the conversation to some of Maddie's latest antics, which transformed Charlie once again and gave me a chance to catch my breath.

I turned my head towards the dark windows of the police cruiser, watching as we drove by slowly, down the winding roads and dark woods of the Olympic region. Rain blanketed the windows like a heavy curtain; Bella had warned me not to expect that to let up much during our short stay. She'd also tried to warn me about Charlie, and apparently, she hadn't been joking. I was drowning right now and desperately needed someone to throw me a lifeline.

I resurfaced in the middle of Bella and her dad's latest topic of discussion.

"…had a nice Thanksgiving Dinner last night with Edward and his family. They celebrated early so that we could be with them," Bella said proudly. I turned to grin widely at her. Her eyes sparkled in my direction. Yeah, she was worth this torture.

"Well that was certainly nice of them," Charlie responded, sounding genuinely impressed.

"What do your parents do Edward?" Charlie asked, in a tone that implied that he knew but couldn't actually remember.

"My mom is on the board of several charities for causes that are important to her; breast cancer, child welfare, the city's homeless."

Charlie looked authentically awed.

_Thank you Esme Cullen, for being such a philanthropist_.

"And my father is a heart surgeon."

"Oh that's right," Charlie cut in. "Carlisle Cullen, right?"

"Yes sir."

"Hmm," he nodded. "So how come you didn't follow in your father's footsteps?"

"The medical field just wasn't for me sir."

Another slow nod.

"I suppose it's not a field you can enter into without discipline and dedication."

"_Charlie_," Bella warned through clenched teeth.

I squeezed _her_ hand this time. "It's alright love," I whispered with a wink.

"Actually sir, I did go to medical school for a couple of years, before switching to business school. I guess…it's not a big secret that I haven't been the most disciplined individual for the past few years, but I think that's because I didn't know what I really wanted."

Charlie quirked an eyebrow through the rearview mirror. "And now you do?"

"Yes sir. Now I do."

There was no nod, no shake of the head; no muttering or mumbling this time. He simply stared at me for two seconds that felt more like two lifetimes, before the fact that he was driving forced him to turn his attention back to the road.

"Edward _is_ dedicated and disciplined," Bella defended me. "In fact, he and his group have won _several_ advertising awards over the past few years."

Charlie spared me another quick glance. "Well, yeah," he murmured, "I suppose that would take hard work," he allowed.

Half a century or half an hour later, we turned the corner on a quiet block lined with a scattering of small homes, and then Charlie pulled up in front of a small white house, faded but well-maintained.

"Well, we're here," he announced.

Charlie picked Maddie up and I pulled our bags out, following Bella and her father into the small house. He turned on the lights as we walked through, and then stopped when we reached a small living room. I put the bags down.

Bella did a one-eighty turn. I followed her eyes around a room with faded but clean cream walls, a small flat screen TV up over the mantle of the fireplace, a few pictures on either side of it, and a faded recliner and sofa in the middle. A set of folded sheets and a pillow sat neatly on the sofa.

"You cleaned up?" Bella asked through raised brows.

Charlie looked like he might be blushing under his beard. "Sue may have helped me a bit.

"I went to the market and picked up everything you said you'd need. Got some strawberries for Maddie too. I know she likes'em."

He cleared his throat then. "Your room's ready upstairs. I put fresh sheets in there and fresh towels in the bathroom." His eyes moved to the sofa and back to me before quickly returning to Bella. "I…uh…I figured Maddie would be sleeping with you, and it's a small…room," – he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand – "so I brought down some sheets and stuff for Edward…"

"This'll be fine sir, thank you," I said quickly, feeling as awkward as he looked. I looked over at Bella and her face was bright pink.

"Well, it's pretty late and it'll probably be a long day tomorrow, so I'll just say goodnight now…Bells, you want me to put Maddie in your room for you?" he asked.

She smiled at him. "Yeah dad, thanks. And thanks for picking us up. I'll be up in a few."

Charlie glanced between me and his daughter and nodded.

"Alright, see you both in the morning." And with that he turned and climbed up the narrow staircase leading to the rooms upstairs.

As soon as we heard the floor creak at the top landing I let out a huge gust of air, throwing myself against the sofa that would be my bed for the next few nights. Bella came to sit next to me.

"Well, that wasn't so bad," she said wryly, looking straight ahead.

I turned to her. "Were we in the same car on the way over?"

She gave me a throaty chuckle, picking up my hand in her own and resting them between us. "It could've been worse."

I arched an eyebrow. "You mean, he could've pulled out his revolver, shot me straight through the heart, and buried me in the woods?"

She laughed. "I told you, he didn't have his revolver on him!"

"Is _that_ supposed to be my consolation here? Your father hates me."

"He does not," she cried out softly, moving herself into my line of vision. I stared at her doubtfully.

"Anyway, don't worry. By the time we leave on Sunday, you'll be his favorite pipe-cleaning, yacht-sailing, fact-fudging, superhero med school dropout this side of the Pacific."

I smirked at her. "Ha. Funny."

She laughed and gave me a quick kiss before pulling back and biting her lip.

"What?"

She studied me. "How has it been…the other times you've met your…girlfriends' parents?"

I held her gaze and shrugged, shaking my head. "I've never gone out of my way to meet anyone's parents," I said honestly.

She looked surprised. "Not even…Tanya's, in the couple of years you were together?"

I shook my head slowly, lifting one shoulder up and down. "I met her father once at a party she took me to. He bragged about the overinflated value of his hotels' stock price for half the night, and then tried to pick my brain for free marketing advice for the rest of it. Her mother…no, I never met her mother."

She nodded slowly.

"Why are we talking about Tanya?"

She shrugged and then angled her body to face me, resting an elbow on the back of the sofa and using her hand to support her head. Her dark hair cascaded loosely down the front of her shoulder. I turned and mimicked her pose.

"I'm just thinking…" –she snorted- "you must really regret getting on that plane with us tonight…just to come to this rainy little town and be called names through the rear-view mirror of a police cruiser. I just can't help thinking how much easier…_that_ must've been. You know, so much less to deal with."

I stared at her for a long while before sighing and bringing our hands up, kissing the back of her hand. "It was a shitty and empty life. Easier? Maybe. Better? Never."

I looked back up at her and she smiled, her chocolate eyes gazing at me thoughtfully.

"And as for regretting coming here," I smirked, "Do you know what I'd probably be doing right now if I hadn't come?"

"What?"

"I'd probably be at home staring at the ceiling, wondering what you and Maddie were doing, and making deals with God about what I'd go through just to be with you two. And trust me, a possibly trigger-happy dad would not be beyond the limits of my list."

She chuckled. "Edward, my dad's a good guy. I guess he's just-"

"Bella, you don't have to make excuses for your dad. I can't really blame him can I?"

"He shouldn't have-"

"Yes, he should have. Look, you wanted me to come with you so that he could meet me, get to know the real me? Well, I don't know if he'll like the real me Bella, but I'm willing to try. I want to get to know him, because we seem to agree on at least one thing. You and Maddie are the most…precious things on this Earth. Hopefully that'll be enough so that he can at least respect me by the time this weekend is over. If it's not," I pursed my lips, "then at least we'll know we tried."

She nodded thoughtfully.

Now it was my turn to ask. I removed my hand from where it cradled my head and moved it to run it down Bella's long hair.

"How was he…with Paul?" I stared at the way my fingers got lost in her hair as I spoke. "I mean, I know he hates him now, but was he ever-"

She chuckled humorlessly. "He _never_ liked Paul. He tolerated him for a while, for my sake, but…" – she shook her head vigorously – "there was _never_ any love lost between the both of them."

I nodded and wondered if I just seemed to be another version of Paul to Charlie Swan. For the first time I could remember, I actually gave a damn what my girlfriend's father thought of me, and it surprised me that I wanted him to be able to do more than simply tolerate me for his daughter's sake.

Bella and I both settled our heads back against the sofa again.

It had been a long day, between traveling and then the couple of photographers that had spotted us. But Bella honestly seemed to have taken the photographers part okay. I mean, she'd obviously been nervous, but I'd just held on to her, and then when we'd finally boarded the flight, I'd looked into her eyes, searching for the wall, the guardedness she used to protect herself. But I hadn't found it.

"So did you enjoy first-class?" I asked, switching to a lighter topic of conversation.

She pursed her lips and rolled her eyes. "It was alright I guess."

I raised my eyebrows. "I thought it was a pretty good flight. Smooth and quiet, and the attendants were attentive."

She snorted and gave me a sideways glance. "Yeah, to you. Lucky the flight ended when it did. I was getting ready to deck the attendant."

I chuckled heartily. "Bella she was about sixty years old."

Bella smirked. "Not that one."

I frowned. The only other flight attendant assigned to first class had been a-

"The guy?" I asked, lifting myself up to face her directly.

She arched an eyebrow, and started imitating him. "Oh Mr. Cullen, can I get you another blanket? Do you need me to fluff up your pillow? Mr. Cullen did you enjoy your wine, can I get you another glass? Mr. Cullen, can I peel your shrimp for you?"

I choked on a laugh. "He was just being attentive, it's his job! And he never offered to peel my shrimp. I would've probably taken him up on that."

"Hmph, attentive my ass," she scoffed, dropping my hand and crossing her arms in front of herself. "Is that why he offered you a back rub?"

"Hold on, hold on," I said, putting my palms up, "What he said was," I clarified, with my forefinger up, "would _anyone_ here like a back rub? He never offered to give _me_ one personally."

She gave me a 'you've got to be kidding me' look. "Yeah, that's why he was looking right at _you_ when he was offering it."

"Well I sincerely hope it goes _without_ saying that you don't need to worry about anything like that. Otherwise I'm doing something really wrong here."

That made her chuckle. "Damn Edward, if some people could actually undress you with their eyes, you'd be walking around naked all the time."

I uncrossed her arms and picked up her hand again. "Well let's be grateful they can't do shit with their eyes, otherwise I'd be pretty cold."

She rolled _her_ eyes. "Anyway, if _that's_ the kind of extra attention you were talking about in first-class, I gotta say, I wasn't very impressed."

I laughed loudly. "Okay then, if you didn't enjoy that, we can always charter a-"

"Don't even think about saying 'charter a private plane back home.'" Damn, the woman was reading my mind now. "You've got to take it slowly with me here. I can't go from coach to private planes overnight!"

I gave her a crooked grin, lowering my head to her neck and trailing my lips up and down, licking the spot just behind her ear and then sucking lightly on her earlobe. She gasped and I felt her shoulders turn to jelly, like putty in my hands. I smiled into her neck.

"I bet I could convince you if I really wanted to," I murmured. "I've got a secret weapon you know."

"Yeah…I know all about your secret weapon," she whispered in a quivering voice. "You don't play fair."

She turned her face so that her mouth met mine and then she parted her lips and our tongues started dancing against each other frenziedly. And just like that I forgot that we'd been traveling all day, and that her father was right upstairs. I was worked up now and I wanted more. I hungrily sucked her tongue into my mouth, making her whimper. The sound made me hard right away and I picked her up from the where she lay against the sofa and pulled her over me. She straddled me with one leg over each hip and her hands disappeared into my hair, making me moan lightly. My hands moved to rub her perfectly round bottom up and down and all around before resting them squarely against it and pushing her down into me.

"_Uhhh Edward_," she breathed, bringing her lips to my ear. The lust in her voice made me even crazier with need, so I pushed her deeper into me, moving my hips against her and eliciting more groans and whimpers from her beautiful mouth. She moved her mouth to my neck, sucking and licking vigorously while she grabbed a fistful of hair in each hand.

"_Jesus Bella."_ We moved against each other rhythmically, kissing and licking, the springs on the old sofa under us groaning right along with us with each movement.

Loud footsteps directly above us had Bella flying off of my lap in a split-second. They moved back and forth determinedly, purposefully. I quickly put the pillow over my very noticeable hard-on.

Breathing hard, I looked over at Bella. Her face was flushed and her lips were swollen, and her chest rose and fell heavily with her breaths.

"I think it would be a good idea if I kept my secret weapon holstered this weekend, in case your dad decides to use _his_ weapon on me."

Bella frowned. "Please tell me you didn't just compare your weapon to my dad's? Ugh!" She shuddered. Her reaction conjured strange and unwelcome images in my head. I shuddered too.

"Okay, between Charlie's none-too-subtle stomping and your freaky puns, the mood's definitely been killed." She got up off the sofa quickly. "Now I'm going to go pour some Clorox over my mind's eye before I go to bed."

I threw myself down across my new bed. "Yeah, save half of the bottle for me," I agreed with another shudder. She chuckled and bent down to kiss me chastely on the lips before turning and heading up the stairs.

"Sleep well Edward," she called out quietly.

"Yeah, not bloody likely," I mumbled to myself.

OOOOOOOOOO

Despite having gone to bed fearing for my life and with another case of blue balls, I didn't stir all night, until a warm pair of little hands nudged my eyelids open.

"Good mowning Edwood!" a sweet little musical voice greeted me. "Happy Thanksgiving! My grampa's making us bwekfast! Come on! Get up!"

I sat up slowly, vaguely aware of my surroundings.

Maddie grinned widely, sitting next to me in her jammies, with her legs tucked under her.

"Good morning princess," I finally murmured in a thick voice. "Where's mommy?"

"She's still sleeping. Grampa says not to wake huh yet 'cause she's tie-uhd."

I nodded.

"Come on!" Maddie repeated, jumping off the sofa and pulling on my hand. "Grampa made us bwekfast."

I let her pull me up and followed her hesitantly towards the kitchen, where I could hear footsteps and the sound of silverware and dishes banging around. I walked into the bright kitchen, my eyes squinting from the brightness of the yellow cabinets, a thousand times brighter than the view from the window, where deep darkness seemed to be giving way to not-so-deep darkness and, none-too-surprisingly, rain.

Maddie's grandfather stood by the sink, messing around with a coffee machine and buttering a stack of toast. He was dressed in a flannel shirt and waterproof fishing pants.

He turned when he heard us. "Edward, good morning. Happy Thanksgiving," he said quietly.

"Good morning sir," I replied. "Happy Thanksgiving." I stood awkwardly at the threshold, while Maddie went to sit at the table.

"Coffee's ready," he said, pulling out a mug from the cupboard in front of him and pouring the black liquid into it. He turned to hand it to me.

Thanks," I said, walking over and reaching for it.

He nodded. "Milk and sugar are on the table."

I moved to the table while he turned back around and reached for the plate with the stack of toast and then placed it on the middle of the table

"Here you go, Maddie Mo," Charlie said cheerfully.

I watched little Maddie's face while I poured sugar and milk into my mug. She stared at the stack of toast expectantly, as if she were waiting for it to magically transform into something else.

Abruptly, she looked up me with a sanguine expression on her little face. "Edwood, can I have booberry pantates fo-uh bwekfast?"

My eyes grew wide. "Maddie I-"

"Maddie Mo, what's wrong with the toast?" Charlie asked her.

She shrugged. "I want booberry pantates. Edwood _always_ makes me booberry pantates when he sleeps ovuh."

_And the day starts_.

Charlie pursed his lips and looked at me. "Does he now?" he asked in a low voice.

"Well not always. I mean, I don't always stay- and when I do, it's usually on the pull-out," – _damn it_, usually means not always – "I mean-"

Charlie put a hand out, as if he didn't want to hear anymore. He shook his head. "I don't have blueberries, but I think I have some instant pancake mix around her somewhere." He waved his arm towards the cabinets with a resigned air. "Go ahead and help yourself if you'd like."

I looked back down at Maddie. "Peez Edwood?" she pleaded with her big innocent brown eyes and pouty little mouth.

I managed to smile. "Sure princess."

She giggled happily, and somehow, that sound calmed me.

I found the still closed box of pancake mix easy enough, chuckling internally as I thought of the fit Esme would have if she knew I was using an instant mix right now. Either way, Maddie dug into her pancakes happily once they were ready, even though blueberries had been replaced with strawberries.

"Edwood, you make the yummiest bwekfasts!" she exclaimed enthusiastically as she stabbed at another forkful of pancakes. I ruffled her hair and grinned at her, forcing myself to eat a second piece of toast from the stack Charlie had prepared with such care. I felt his eyes on me from across the table.

"Grampa, Edwood's my best fwend!" Maddie told her grandfather through a mouthful of pancakes.

"Is he now?" Charlie asked.

"He coluhs with me, and he reads me bed-time stowies, and he sings to me. And he's mommy's speshow fwend," she said, smiling up at me.

I smiled back weakly.

"Mmm hm," Charlied muttered.

"He tick-ohs mommy and makes huh laugh. Grampa, wheuh's the pichoh of the flowuhs you used to have on that wall theuh?" she asked, pointing with her little finger. I let out a quiet sigh of relief that her attention had been diverted.

"It fell and broke Maddie," Charlie replied, his eyes still on me.

"Oh. Edwood, when mommy wakes up can we go to the beach? I want to show you all the pretty seashells theuh. You can help me pick some like when we go to the pahk and you help me pick pwetty wocks."

I ran my hand down her long hair. "Maddie princess, I think it might be too cold for the beach. And it's raining…"

She giggled. "Silly Edwood. It _always _wains in Fowks."

"Well maybe when mommy wakes up-"

"Maddie, Edward and I are going fishing this morning, and then Sue and her kids and Billy and Uncle Jake are coming over for dinner. So maybe tomorrow…"

I gave Charlie a bewildered look. "Fishing sir?"

He nodded.

"Grampa I wanna go fishing too! Peez grampa?"

Charlie's face softened like a marshmallow at his granddaughter's plea, but he drew in a deep breath before answering.

"Maddie, I promise I'll take you fishing before you go back to New York, but this here's a grown up fishing trip, for only Edward and me. Okay?"

Maddie looked down, a disappointed frown on her face. "Okay grampa."

"Now you go upstairs and stay with mommy until she wakes up, and we'll be back in a little while."

"Okay," she agreed again. She got up from the table and took a few steps before turning back around and running back to me.

"Edwood, you-uh not going home right. You-uh coming back?"

"Of course I'm coming back princess. I'll see you in a little while, just like your grandpa said."

She smiled widely, her chocolate eyes sparkling. Then she reached out and put her little arms around me. "I love you Edwood."

Yeah. This was all worth it.

I cupped her tiny face in my hands and kissed the top of her hair. "I love you too princess," I murmured.

She pulled away then and skipped out of the kitchen.

"Bye grampa! See you latuh!" she called out, and then I heard her little footsteps scurrying up the stairs. I turned to Charlie. He was watching me thoughtfully.

After a few awkward seconds he said, "Well, you better go wash up and change so we can get going and get back early. You can use the half-bath down the hall."

"Should we let Bella know-"

"I've already written a note for her. We won't be long."

I nodded and went to change, hoping I could keep my promise to Maddie and come back after our 'fishing trip.'

OOOOOOOOOO

Charlie and I sat quietly on opposite ends of his small fishing boat. We'd been sitting with our lines in the water, waiting for fish to bite, for the better part of an hour, neither of us breaking the oppressive silence.

The rain fell insistently – though not as heavily as it had been earlier or last night – from the murky sky. In the distance, tall mountains peaked out from behind the heavy fog, reaching all the way up to the clouds – just as Bella had described it to me once. If it weren't for the cold, sticky rain and the nerve-wracking silence surrounding me, I'd actually be enjoying the view.

Charlie finally broke the silence, catching me by surprise, "So Edward, you're probably wonderin' why we're out here Thanksgiving mornin' instead of home with…_our_ loved ones." He kept his eyes on his line as he spoke.

"Yes sir. I guess I am," I answered honestly.

He was silent again for a while, and I thought maybe he'd changed his mind about talking after all.

"My daughter was really upset when I called her the other night."

_Shit_.

"I know sir," I said honestly again. "We had a bit of a…disagreement, but I promise you-"

"You promise me what?" he snorted. "That there won't be any more disagreements? Son, there will _always_ be disagreements in a relationship. What matters is how you handle them. I didn't bring you out here so that you could promise me you'll always agree with my daughter."

He was quiet again.

"Bella told you about Paul?"

"Yes sir."

He nodded, but kept his eyes on the water. Then he took a deep breath.

"You're a young man Edward," he began. "Maybe someday you'll be a…father." He sighed. "When Bella started dating Paul, I'd hoped it was just a phase. Don't know if you've realized it, but Bella's different from other women-"

"Of course I've realized it sir," I interrupted.

He turned to look at me with a smirk, and then turned back to his line.

"Anyway, what I was trying to say is, she was always more…mature than most girls her age. I couldn't see her taking someone like Paul seriously, and I didn't want to interfere because I figured she'd outgrow him on her own. I guess I failed to see that no matter what, she was still just a teenaged kid. But then a month became two, and two became six, and by the time I realized I should've put my foot down, it was too late. She'd fallen in love and if I'd tried to put my foot down then, she would've distanced herself from me, rather than from him. I didn't want to lose my daughter Edward."

It sounded like an apology. But I didn't answer. It didn't sound like he wanted me to. He was silent again, either lost in his thoughts or giving me time to try to figure out what he was trying to say.

"I'm not gonna go through the whole sordid mess. Bella will tell you as much as she wants you to know, that's not my place. I'm just here to tell you one thing."

Now he turned to face me, and I turned towards him. His brown eyes – so much like his daughter's and granddaughter's - bore into mine.

"I _won't_ make that mistake again Edward. I told my daughter the other day that I trusted her judgment. And I do. Wholeheartedly. We all mistakes, we all ignore our better judgment at some point in our lives. Doesn't mean we should stop trusting ourselves or others. I ignored my better judgment when I didn't try to get her away from Paul early on."

"Sir, I would never hurt Bella that way. I know you're probably worried, because of what you've seen in the media-"

"Yes, I am," he nodded. "But like I said, I trust my daughter's judgment. If she thinks you've changed, well then…I'll go along with it." His eyes narrowed. "But I'll be watching son. I may be a couple of thousand miles away, but…this time…if I do see something, or hear something that _Bella's_ not happy with…if that look she came home with yesterday or the one on my granddaughter's face this morning fades away, then I _will_ be saying something, and you _will_ be hearing from me. Do we understand each other?"

I swallowed thickly, but met his eyes directly. "Yes sir. But Charlie, that's not going to happen. I love Bella and Maddie," I said in a clear, steady voice, "and they love me."

There was no point in being ambiguous, or beating around the bush with it. Bella had said Charlie was a man of few words, and as such, I figured he'd appreciate directness more than anything. I hoped someday I'd be more than just tolerated by this man, but I wasn't going to apologize for being in love with his daughter either.

Charlie searched my eyes for what felt like an eternity, and I let him. Whatever he was looking for, whatever he needed to find, would either be there or it wouldn't. After a few minutes, his expression changed, and the hard lines around his eyes seemed to soften minisculely. Once again, Charlie looked like a young man.

He nodded slowly. "Alright then," he said simply, still keeping his eyes on me.

We stared at each other for a long time. "Now pull your line in," he said abruptly, "you've caught something."

I blinked. "Oh. Okay." I turned back to my line, and reeled it in quickly.

"And Edward?"

"Yes sir?"

"Stop calling me sir. You're making me feel like an old fart."

I suppressed a smirk. "Yes sir. I mean, yes Chief."

"That's better."

I stole a look at him while I reeled my line in, and it could've been the thick fog messing with my vision, but I could've sworn I saw one edge of his mouth twitch up under the beard.

Charlie didn't say anything else for the rest of our 'fishing trip' but suddenly, the silence wasn't so uncomfortable.

OOOOOOOOOO

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**Reviews are almost as yummy as Edward's pancakes. Leave one.**

**Part Two of this chapter will be up in a couple of days.**


	26. Chapter 25 Back Into Your Place

**A/N: So it took longer than a couple of days. Sorry. Real life and all of that. Hope this super long chappy makes up for the wait.**

**Make sure you read the 'TV excerpt' at the end!**

**This has not been betad, so please excuse any errors, grammatical and otherwise.**

**All characters belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 25 – Back into Your Place**

**Chapter Song Rec: **

_**We Will Rock You**_** – Queen**

**EPOV**

Charlie headed straight for the shower when we got back home from our fishing adventure late Thanksgiving morning. Not that we had any fish to show for our early morning trip, since Charlie made us 'catch and release.' Apparently, Trout weren't in season. What I _was_ coming back with was a sense that, although maybe not necessarily this weekend, at some point Charlie would accept the fact that I truly loved his daughter and granddaughter. Well, that _and_ all my appendages in place; I wasn't about to argue over a Steelhead or two.

Delicious scents floating in from the kitchen greeted me as I walked into the house, as well as both familiar and unfamiliar voices. I followed them into the kitchen, where Bella, Maddie and three other people stood around getting today's dinner ready. _My_ girls were over by the counter, mixing and measuring, while two other women stood nearby, mashing something. And on Bella's other side, a tall, russet-skinned man was bent over at the waist, his elbows resting on the counter as he studied a newspaper open in front of him.

"All I'm sayin' Bells is that you gotta smile a little more next time, show them pearly whites. You sorta look like you could use some Pepto in this picture," the guy snickered.

Bella gingerly picked a hand up from whatever she was mixing and smacked him in the back of the head.

"Ow!" he chuckled. "JK! Jeez!"

I cleared my throat. Five pairs of eyes turned towards me.

"Edwood, you-uh back!" Maddie cried, running to me and wrapping her arms around my leg. I bent down to pick her up and then trailed my eyes back to Bella.

She smiled widely and walked over to me, cleaning her hands on a kitchen towel.

"You're back," she copied Maddie, her voice thick with relief. She gave me a quick kiss on the lips.

"I'm back," I repeated.

Bella turned around to face the other three people in the kitchen.

"Sue, Leah, Seth, this is Edward. Edward, this is Sue Clearwater and her kids, Leah and Seth."

Sue was an older lady, about Charlie's age. Leah appeared to be about Bella's age, and Seth, though a few inches taller than me and built like a brick shithouse, looked to be a few years younger than us.

"Oh Shit! Edward Cullen!" Seth exclaimed, walking over to me with an amazed grin. He shook my hand eagerly. "Man, you are my hero!"

"Seth," his mother said in a warning tone.

I frowned quizzically at the kid's strange enthusiasm.

"Good to meet you," I said to all of them.

Seth kept staring at me in open awe, but his mother and sister gave me warier looks. In fact, I was pretty sure Leah was scowling. I stuck the hand that wasn't cradling Maddie in my pocket.

"Uhm, will you excuse us for a minute?" Bella said. She gently pulled Maddie out of my arms and instructed her to stay and help Sue. Then she pulled me into the empty living room.

"Are you okay?"

'I'm fine."

She breathed out a sigh of relief before narrowing her eyes. "Wait 'til I get my hands on Charlie. Where is he?"

"He's taking a shower. But Bella-"

"I swear I had no idea Edward. If I would've known he was going to drag you out of here at the crack of dawn this morning-"

"Bella, love," – I chuckled – "it's fine. We went fishing. It was…fun."

She pursed her lips and lifted her brows. "Hmm. Fun. Really?"

I snorted and pulled her into me. I thought I felt her sniff my chest.

"Yes, Really. In fact, I think in a decade or two, Chief Swan may actually be able to move beyond just tolerating me."

She smirked. "I guess that's progress then. And here I was scared I was going to have to dredge up the river for your body," she ribbed. I pinched her ass.

"So what was that about smiling more next time…" I thumbed towards the kitchen.

She rolled her eyes and bit her lip. "Looks like our picture made it into today's paper."

I shook my head. "God-damned photographers. Not even because it's Thanksgiving-"

"It's alright," she chuckled lightly. "Actually, other than the fact that Seth thinks I look constipated, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It was pretty accurate, at least," she shrugged thoughtfully.

"Oh yeah? Let me see," I said, moving towards the kitchen.

"Uh Edward, would you mind taking a shower first?" she pulled me back by my arm. "You kinda smell like you took a swim in the Sol-Duc."

I snickered and pulled her against me, kissing her greedily and purposely rubbing myself against her. She screeched.

"Edward you stink and you're going to stink me up!" she laughed, but soon her body molded itself against mine and she kissed me back, my less than pleasant odor totally forgotten, and then it was her rubbing herself on me. I chuckled against her lips. For all her complaints about my smell, it was me that had to push her away.

"Hey what's up with Evil Eye in there?" I asked, remembering the scowls Leah had flung at me. "If looks could kill you'd be drawing chalk markings around my body right now."

Bella shrugged and looked down. "Yeah, I don't really know what's going on with Leah. She's been acting…weird since she got here this morning. I guess…Jake must've talked to her." She looked back up at me and shrugged again. "You're probably just evil by association at this point."

I let out a large gust of air, shaking my head. I knew I'd promised Bella I'd behave, but fuck if Jake wasn't trying my patience before he even got here.

"Don't even worry about it, okay?" she said.

I snorted. "Trust me, I couldn't care less how she looks at me. I just don't want anyone making _you_ uncomfortable."

"You don't know Leah," she snickered. "I'm pretty used to her attitudes."

When Charlie got out of the shower, I went to take mine and changed in Bella's room. Bella had been dressed in a pair of jeans and a white button down shirt, so I dressed in jeans and a dark button down. I tried to tame my hair, but it just wasn't working with me today. I smirked at my reflection in front of the mirror over her dresser, and turned around and took a quick scan of Bella's old bedroom.

It was pretty stark really, probably because she'd taken most of her things with her when she'd moved to New York. There was a full sized bed and a dresser, and a bookshelf with a few books and pictures as well as some of Maddie's toys. I walked over to look at the pictures. One of them was of Bella and Jacob. She looked to be about sixteen or so, sitting on a rock at what appeared to be a beach. And then another was of her at her high school graduation, with Charlie and a woman that looked like an older version of her. Renee I figured. I stared at the pictures for a while, and then as I was about to walk away and head downstairs, a shoebox at the bottom of the bookshelf caught my attention.

It was nestled under a few books that had been stacked over each other, and when I pulled it out, the word 'Pictures' was scribbled in black Sharpie along the top. I picked it up and carried it back to the bed, where I sat down and opened it up.

The shoebox was filled with hundreds of pictures, in all different sizes, and at first glance it was obvious there was no order to them. The first was a pink rectangular birth announcement for Maddie. The inscription at the top announced _'It's a girl!'_ in big black script, with the vitals under it in smaller script. I let my finger trace the little bundle dressed in a long pink gown, a bittersweet sensation gnawing at my chest. When I turned the picture over, '_My Granddaughter_!' was written on the back in the same black Sharpie ink from the shoebox's top. So this was Charlie's shoebox.

The next few pictures were of Bella and Maddie, all mixed together in no particular order. Bella as a little girl, Maddie as a baby, Bella as a teenager, Maddie a few months ago. Some had inscriptions in the back, like the birth announcement. _Maddie Mo's first step; Bella – Summer 1990; Bella – 11__th__ birthday; Maddie Mo – fishing_, and on and on.

And then the next picture stopped my heart.

Bella was standing radiantly in a white dress, simple, but heartbreakingly beautiful on her. Next to her, with his arm draped possessively around her shoulder, stood who I could only assume was Paul Forrester.

He was fucking tall, even taller than me, with wide set shoulders and shoulder length dark hair. Bella looked like a tiny porcelain doll next to him. Her smile was devastatingly glorious as she looked up at him, all adoring. He on the other hand, looked straight ahead with a triumphantly smug grin on his face. As if he'd just won some sort of bet.

It was…painful to look at, but like a masochist, I couldn't make myself look away. I must've stared at the picture for ten minutes before finally breaking out of whatever trance had come over me. I turned the picture over. _Bella's wedding – July 22__nd_, was written in black sharpie ink on the back.

The next picture also stopped my heart, but for a completely different reason. It was of a very pregnant Bella. She was in what seemed to be a meadow, sitting back with her arms supporting her. And although she was also smiling in this picture, this time there was an obvious sadness in her eyes, in the slope of her shoulders. As if she had the weight of the world on them.

Like the birth announcement for Maddie, this picture also brought with it a stab of bittersweet emotions. Bella looked so delicate and magnificent - a life growing inside her. And even though I knew it was childish and made _no_ sense, I couldn't stop the thought that _I_ should've been the one who put that baby inside her; who made Maddie _with_ her.

I turned the picture over.

_Bella – Eight months pregnant._

I stared at the picture for a long, long time. And then I put it in my back pocket, put the box back on the book shelf, and went downstairs.

OOOOOOOOOO

By the time I made my way into the kitchen, the aromas coming out of there were driving me crazy. I offered to help but Bella said they had it under control. And anyway, the leery look Sue Clearwater was giving me combined with the open glares her daughter Leah kept throwing my way, kinda made me want to get my ass out of that kitchen pronto. So I made my way into the living room.

"Edward, grab a beer and take a seat," Charlie commanded from his recliner. His eyes didn't leave the TV. "Seahawks are playing the Giants."

_Great._

I opened up the cooler next to the sofa and grabbed a beer before taking a seat on the sofa, on the opposite corner from Seth. He turned to look at me, and then glanced over at Charlie before scooting in closer.

"So tell me man, what's it like to be you?" he whispered conspiratorially.

I looked at him curiously. "What do you mean…"

"You kiddin' me bro?" he chuckled quietly. "You're like, a hero to me and a bunch'a my buddies." He glanced quickly at Charlie again before lowering his voice even further. "All those chicks and cars." He wriggled his brows and took a drink from his beer.

I stared at him, trying to figure him out, before taking a drink from my own beer.

"The cars…are cool," I admitted, "The girls…" - I whispered, shaking my head - "Well, I'm with Bella now."

Seth grinned skeptically, taking another long chug of beer. He eyed me for a while.

"Holy shit!" he chuckled softly, his eyes growing wide as if he'd just realized something. "You're _not_ fucking around are you?"

"Seth, language."

"Sorry Charlie."

"Oh crap!" he laughed quietly, his dark eyes twitching but more friendly than curious now. "Jake's gonna _really_ bust a gut when he gets here now."

I smirked and drank my beer.

For the next hour or so, Seth talked my ear off about every subject under the sun; or in this part of the country, under the clouds. And then he filled me in on his life from birth to the present. Charlie kept telling him to shut up and let him hear the game, but this only worked for a couple of minutes at a time, and then he'd start up again.

At first I wasn't sure if the kid was actually for real, or if he was just trying to fuck with me; a spy sent in from the enemy camp and all that shit. But the grins from ear to ear, the friendly look in his eyes, the easy going attitude – it was impossible to dislike Seth.

Taking advantage of a two-second pause in Seth's conversation, I got up to check in on Bella and Maddie. But just then Bella walked into the living room.

She stood next to her father's recliner and looked at me.

"You okay?" she asked with an anxious smile.

"Yeah," I smiled back at her reassuringly.

She nodded and turned to her dad, kneeling in front of him and saying something in a low voice.

Charlie pursed his lips. "Billy assured me yesterday that they would be here. Don't know what's takin' them so long."

They stared at each other.

"Well I don't know what to do," Bella murmured quietly. "Dinner's going to start to get cold, and if I-"

Just then Seth, who'd gone to stand by the window, called out,

"Billy and Jake are here!" His eyes moved to me. "Boooy, things are gonna get heavy now!"

Something else I'd learned about Seth in the past hour? His brain and mouth had no filter.

Bella stood up quickly and turned to me again, her eyes wide.

"Well okay then," Charlie said, getting up too. "Now we can eat some dinner."

His eyes came to me in warning, calm and composed, and then he started walking slowly towards the door. I stood up and Bella walked over to me, reaching for my hand. She inhaled nervously.

"Hey, calm down alright?" I said sternly, already annoyed at seeing her get so worked up. "I promised I'd behave, didn't I?"

She nodded.

Yeah, that promise almost went out the window pretty much the second Jacob Black walked through Charlie Swan's door. Huge, hulking and radiating hostility, he stalked in behind an older man I assumed was his father, and his eyes went immediately to me and Bella, grimacing widely when he caught sight of us. I felt Bella tense next to me.

"Jake," she said smiling, but I could hear the nervous edge in her voice. And that shit just pissed me off even more. I tightened my hold on her hand.

Jacob drew in a deep breath and walked over to us, his eyes intently on Bella. He stood in front of her for a long while, staring, before abruptly pulling her to him in a bear hug that forced me to choose between holding on to her hand or breaking her arm off.

"Bella," he breathed, his voice at total odds with the hostile way he'd walked in.

"Hey Jake," Bella said softly.

With his arms still wrapped tightly around _my_ girlfriend, Jacob's eyes trailed to me, and back were the hostile looks. He glared openly, hatred reflected in the black pupils of his eyes. His expression said it all; I was an intruder, a thief.

That was when I realized that maybe I'd been a bit too hasty in my promise to Bella.

Jacob Black wasn't going to let go without a fight.

After a few seconds, Bella gently pushed him away, and he moved back reluctantly. She took my hand and Jacob's eyes flew down. He frowned and when he looked back up, a deep scowl was etched across his russet face.

"Jake, this is Edward," Bella said in an even voice. "Edward, this is my good friend Jake."

He made no move; no nod of the head; no hand shake. His eyes locked on mine while he wordlessly called me every name in the book and I fought every instinct to bury my fist into his face. I squared my jaw, glaring back, until the warm hand wrapped tightly around mine reminded me of my promise. I exhaled through my nose.

"Jake, good to meet you."

Jake didn't respond. He glared icily at me for a few more moments before turning away and stalking to the kitchen.

_Prick._

I closed my eyes and prayed for the patience to get through the rest of the day without breaking my promise to Bella.

When I opened my eyes again, Bella was staring at me apologetically.

"I'm sorry Edward. Jake shouldn't have-"

"Don't you dare apologize to me for him," I growled quietly. She nodded, still looking apologetic. I sighed deeply and squeezed her hand in mine. "Come on, let's go have dinner."

Seth walked quietly with us at my other side. He shook his head ruefully, patting me on the back.

"Man, try not to let Jake get you too worked up. He can't help it," he shrugged. "He thinks Bella's his."

Yeah. The kid had no filter.

OOOOOOOOOO

"Edward, so how does the Aston Martin run?" Seth quipped from across the dinner table.

"It's a sweet ride," I admitted with a tight smile, trying hard to ignore the dagger-infested glares that had been flying my way since we'd sat down for dinner. I forced a piece of turkey down my throat.

"Uh Charlie, I was thinking we could take the boat up to Seattle in a couple of weeks."

"Yeah, yeah sure. Sounds good Billy."

"Sue, these sweet potatoes are might good."

"Thanks Charlie. I know you don't like'em too sweet, so I left the marshmallows out this year. Besides you gotta save your sweet tooth for Bella's Pecan Pie."

"And don't forget Leah's Apple Pie," Bella added a little too cheerily. Leah didn't look up from her plate.

"Hey Leah," Bella tried again, "While I'm here this weekend, maybe we can take a look at the garage's website together. Jake mentioned you were having trouble-"

Leah looked up at Bella. "Thanks Bella, but I figured it out. Believe it or not, La Push hasn't come to a standstill since you left."

Startled by the bitterness in Leah's tone, I turned to look at Bella next to me. Her mouth hung open but she recovered quickly.

"Um, yeah, I didn't think it had. But…okay then, glad you got it figured out." She picked her fork back up and started moving her food around her plate.

I looked around the table to see if I was the only one who'd found that shit to be totally out of line. But when I angled myself to the left, everyone except Maddie had their heads down. She looked at me and smiled, the tension at the table and the exchange between Leah and Bella having completely gone over her four-year old head. I angled myself to the right. For the first time since we'd sat down, Jake wasn't glowering my way; his eyes were narrowed in Leah's direction.

So I hadn't been the only one, but the fact that Jake had been the only other one to find Leah's attitude towards Bella disturbing did nothing good for my mood.

Bella squeezed my thigh under the table, keeping her eyes on her food. I sighed and stabbed at another piece of turkey.

"Uncoe Jake, did you go fishing with Grampa and Edwood this mowning?"

Jake blinked and looked away from Leah.

"No Mad Girl Maddie. Can't say I had the pleasure," he grinned stiffly before shooting another glare my way.

_Prick._

Maddie frowned and turned her big dark eyes down, trailing her small fork against her plate sluggishly. "I didn't go eithuh," she said sadly.

"Maddie honey, I promised I'd take you fishing this weekend," Charlie chuckled.

"Can Edwood come again?" Maddie asked, her face brightening.

"It's up to him," Charlie answered.

She turned her chocolate orbs to me expectantly.

"Of course I'll come."

She giggled happily.

I smiled back at her. Out of my periphery, I could see Jake glaring at me tightly again. I squared my shoulders and shoveled another forkful of food down my throat, swallowing hard and making a mental list of all the reasons why it would be bad to lunge over the table at him right now. Only two good reasons came to mind, and they were seated at either side of me.

_Calm down Cullen. Calm down Cullen_.

I stabbed at another forkful of food.

"Maddie," Sue began softly, "How's ballet going? Mommy tells me you're enjoying your classes very much."

"Ballet is so much fun!" Maddie clapped her hands enthusiastically. "Aunt Ally teaches me plies and weleveys, and we're gonna have a Chwistmas show too!"

"Who the heck is Aunt Ally?" Jacob cut in.

Maddie turned innocent eyes towards her uncle.

"Aunt Ally is Edwood's sistuh! She's my ballet teachuh!"

Jake pursed his lips and snorted. He lowered his head and shook it slowly from side to side, muttering something unintelligible under his breath.

_Prick._

My hands fisted around my utensils and I got a sudden image of a fork lodged in Jake's right eye. It _almost_ made me smile.

Abruptly, Jake looked back up, smiling sweetly at Maddie.

"So Maddie, how's that friend of yours from ballet?"

I felt Bella stiffen beside me.

Maddie shot Jake a puzzled look. "Which fwend Uncoe Jake?"

He smiled coolly and glanced at Bella before turning his attention back to Maddie.

"Your friend," Jake pressed, grinning flippantly. "Your mommy told me there's a little boy that goes to dance with you. That colors with you. That plays with you." His grin extended from ear to ear.

Maddie tilted her head to the side, her little brows furrowing together. "I don't play with the littoh boys in dance Uncoe Jake. They have the cooties!" she giggled.

"You sure?" Jake asked, shooting another cold smile Bella's way. She glared at him. "Because your mommy told me there was a little boy-"

"I never told you he was a little boy Jake," Bella hissed quietly.

"You never said he wasn't," Jake responded impishly.

My eyes jumped from Bella to Jake, as did everyone else's.

And then it hit me.

…_that goes to dance with you. That colors with you. That plays with you._

_I_ was the god-damned little boy.

Slowly, I angled myself towards Bella, raising an eyebrow. She bit her lip and gave me a faint shake of the head before closing her eyes, readying herself for an eruption.

And as much as I wanted to know how the hell _I'd_ ended up being a ballet-dancing little boy, I _knew_ what Jake was doing.

I let my eyes meet Jacob's and grinned carelessly.

"Well obviously Jacob, there was no _little_ _boy,_ was there?" I picked up my glass of water and raised it to him before taking a drink.

He scowled and looked away from me, stabbing at his food.

_Prick._

OOOOOOOOOO

For the last few minutes of the most trying Thanksgiving dinner of my life, I tried as hard as hell to carry on strained conversation at the table, while feeling Jacob's eyes on me and the deeply rooted fury emanating from him. And Leah was having her own issues tonight. She was obviously holding something against Bella, and by extension, against me. Fuck, next to this, Carlisle's yearly Turkey Day lectures were a walk in the park.

I fought the overwhelming urge to shove Jacob head first into the cranberry stuffing.

Bella met my eyes periodically, soothing me, stroking my leg discreetly under the table. I tried to let it calm me, but when I remembered that The Prick had used _my Maddie_ to help deliver his childish taunt, I felt myself teetering on the edge of my breaking point.

When I glanced his way and once again caught his furious gaze on me, my resolve weakened. I put down my fork and was just about to ask him what exactly his fucking problem was, when Seth suddenly spoke up.

"I was thinking Bells," - Seth said loudly. I looked over at him. He watched me anxiously. "For your next Page Six spread, you should try a Pose and Pucker.

"What in the world is a pose and pucker?" Bella asked, bewildered.

Seth grinned, shifting in his chair eagerly to explain.

"Well, first you strike a sexy pose for the camera, like show some leg, or stick your trunk out or something. Then you pucker those lips of yours like a goldfish. All those Hollywood girls do it. Makes'em look totally hot," he winked at her with a smile. And then to illustrate what he meant, he angled himself so that half his ass rose off of his seat and his hands came up to frame his face. The he narrowed his lips into a pucker.

"See? Pose and Pucker."

Despite the tension at the table, Bella burst out laughing.

"What's a trunk?" Maddie asked, giggling even though she had no idea what Seth was talking about.

Charlie choked on his water and shot Seth a dirty look.

"Good job Seth," I mumbled in mock reproach, but then I grinned at him, because I knew what he'd been trying to do. I rubbed Bella's thigh under the table, soothing her as much as myself. She grabbed my hand and squeezed it hard.

"Bella doesn't have to pose and pucker Seth," Charlie shot out, still frowning at Seth. "She's pretty no matter what."

"That's right," I agreed. I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly, the tension in my muscles loosening. I'd almost lost sight of my purpose here this weekend. And it wasn't to annihilate Jacob, though the thought was tempting. I was here for Bella and Maddie.

Bella smiled and blushed, looking down at her plate of food.

"Now don't listen to Seth," Sue Clearwater chimed in, "You just be yourself in front of those people. Don't pay attention to anything that they say."

I gave Sue an appreciative smile, because although she was clearly Team Jacob here, I could see she cared about Bella and Maddie, and that's all I cared about.

Maybe this dinner could be salvaged after all.

And then Jake chuckled and crossed his arms in front of himself off-handedly.

"Oh I'm sure you'll have plenty of opportunities to pose in front of the cameras in the next few weeks Bells. Won't she Edward?" His eyes turned to me. "I mean, _you're_ in the papers a hell of a lot." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Matter of fact, wasn't it just last month there was a picture going around of you gettin' busy with _another_ friend of yours in the back seat of a cab?"

Bella dropped her fork on her plate – the tinkling sound reverberating loudly throughout the entire room - and flinched as if someone had physically struck her. The table went completely quiet.

I turned to her in horror. "Are you okay?"

She nodded weakly, her face redder than I'd ever seen it. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

She nodded quickly this time. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine," she lied.

My jaw clenched audibly. Every muscle in my body tensed and tightened as I closed my eyes, fighting against the onslaught of fury assaulting me and trying hard as fucking hell to reign myself in.

_God, please grant me the restraint to at least ask Jacob to step outside before beating him to a bloody pulp. _

My nostrils flared and my hands instinctively curled into fists over the table. When I reopened my eyes I looked at Jake and for _just_ _the smallest_ fraction of a second, my plans to murder him faltered.

His expression was full of remorse as he looked at Bella, as if he'd really had no idea how much his words would hurt her.

But he _had _hurt her, and _I'd _had enough.

"That's two Jacob," I said, my voice shaking with rage. I shook my head. "There _won't _be a third."

But remorseful or not, Jacob wasn't going to back down. He slammed both hands over the table and made to get up.

"What's wrong Uncoe Jake?" I vaguely heard Maddie's sweet little voice through the haze of hatred that was quickly enveloping every single one of my senses.

I started to stand.

"Edward," Bella pleaded in a calming whisper, putting a warm hand on my arm.

"Bells!" Charlie's voice boomed authoritatively from his seat at the head of the table. "Why don't you and the rest of the girls go get dessert ready? We'll start cleaning up the table here."

"Dad-"

"Go _now_ Isabella," Charlie said firmly. It was not a request. This was Chief Swan speaking now.

She turned to me warily.

I took a deep breath and lowered myself back down.

"Go ahead love," I winked at her. Charlie's assertive voice had helped clear the fog of fury in my head. I couldn't ruin Bella and Maddie's Thanksgiving this way.

My change in stance seemed to somewhat alleviate her. She set her lips in a tight line and nodded slowly, turning to glare at Jake angrily before picking Maddie up from her chair and marching out of the room with Sue and a bitter-faced Leah behind her.

As soon as Bella was out of the room, Charlie stared heatedly between Jacob and me.

"I'm going to say this once. I've got my daughter and granddaughter here for four days. _Four. Days_. And I'll be damned if I let either of you shitheads ruin this weekend."

He turned burning brown eyes to Jacob. "Jake, you're like a son to me."

Jake grinned smugly at me.

"But Bella _is_ my daughter. Now I'm going to say this to you in front of your father." Billy sat next to Charlie, blank-faced and stoic. "If you make my daughter uncomfortable like that again, I _will_ throw you outta here on your ass."

The smug smile disappeared. I might have laughed at him if I didn't feel like snuffing him out instead.

"Bella is here with Edward this weekend," Charlie continued, while Jacob glowered down at the table, his lip curling into a snarl. "Now you don't have to like that fact; you don't even have to accept it. But while you're under my roof, you _will_ respect it, and respect _her_. Are we understood?"

Jacob didn't answer for a long time. Finally, he twisted his lips and muttered "Yeah Charlie…I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt her."

"Yeah well, you'll have to answer to her for that one," Charlie responded impatiently, though his eyes trailed to me.

He sighed, moving his eyes from me to Jake and then to Seth, who sat still as stone in his chair. "Now you three clean up this table while Billy and I finish watching the game. Call me when Bella's Pecan Pie is out; I've been waiting months for a slice."

He turned his eyes back to me. "Edward, you tried Bella's pie yet?"

"No Chief. Not yet."

"Well then you're in for a treat," he mumbled. And then he and a silent Billy stood up and headed for the living room. Seth quickly started clearing the table while Jake and I stared at each other hatefully for a few minutes longer, both of us with similar postures; stiff shoulders, fisted hands ready at our sides, lips twisted in a snarl.

"Can you two cut the shit already and help me out here?" Seth hissed suddenly, his arms full of empty plates. "I don't know about you guys, but I don't want to get thrown out before gettin' a piece of Bella's Pecan Pie in me!"

OOOOOOOOOO

After that fun dinner and dessert, we all crowded like a happy little bunch in Charlie's small living room, ignoring the fact that two of us had been ready to lunge at each other just a short while ago.

Charlie easily forgot any awkward tension once his attention became refocused on the game, and I tried my best to do the same. When the Seahawks' quarterback fumbled the ball and Manning ran with it to the forty yard line, I was the only one who stood up and cheered. I looked around at every other male in the room. Glowering at me.

Damn, I missed Rosalie just then.

"Yay Edwood! Yay!" A little voice suddenly cheered along with me, jumping up and down on the floor.

"Maddie Mo, what are you cheering for?" her grandfather asked her.

"I don't know!" she shrugged happily. "I just copy Edwood!"

"Maddie," Jacob started. He was sitting on the bottom step of the staircase, apart from the rest of us. "You're a Washington girl, you cheer when _we_ cheer."

"Silly Uncoe Jake," she giggled. "I'm not a Washington girl, I'm a New Yaukuh, like Edwood!" she answered.

I swallowed down my laughter. It was something I was always telling her. She was a New York girl now, and she couldn't have picked a finer moment to remember that fact.

Jacob mumbled something under his breath, and even the fact that the Seahawks went on to win the game didn't seem to cheer him up.

I, on the other hand, sat quietly through the rest of the game with Maddie on my lap, and Bella at my side, and a big fucking smile on my face.

OOOOOOOOOO

By the time the game ended Maddie had fallen asleep, and Bella took her upstairs to bed. Suddenly, the house felt claustrophobic. Bella had been quieter than usual after dinner, and I knew that shit Jake had said during dinner was bothering her, but I couldn't exactly pull her aside to talk to her with everyone around. All I could do was hope that The Prick hadn't set us back again, because then, Thanksgiving or not, I'd really fucking kill him.

A few minutes after Bella had gone upstairs Seth came out of the kitchen carrying a few bottles of beer. He held them up and motioned towards the door. I got up and excused myself.

Seth paused as he passed the steps where Jake sat with his arms resting on his knees.

"Jake, you wanna go outside for a beer with me and Edward?"

Jake looked right past him and made no response.

Seth shook his head. "Suit yourself," he shrugged.

The rain had temporarily let up outside, and Seth and I stood by the curb while he filled me in on more of his life story. Every now and then I'd glance at the small windows upstairs, where Bella was getting Maddie ready for bed, wondering what was going through Bella's mind right now and anxious to be alone with her again.

After catching me glancing upstairs for about the twentieth time, Seth chuckled.

"You two are like, magnets or some shit aren't you? Can't stand to be away from each other too long."

"Yeah well," I snorted, taking a swig of my bottle.

He gave me a bemused grin. "You're good for her you know."

I looked down at my bottle, tracing the mouth with one finger.

"No. Really." He insisted. "Bella's like a…big sister to me. Don't know if you've noticed but Charlie and my mom are sort of like…getting it on and shit."

I cringed. "Not a mental image I needed Seth."

He chuckled. "My point is Bella means a lot to me. And I know the past few years have been hard for her. And even though tonight's been…interesting to say the least, every time you're near her, her face brightens up and she stands a bit taller. Like having you around gives her strength or some shit.

I didn't say anything. My mind was suddenly on Bella's wedding picture, and the way she'd been looking up at Paul, her new husband, eyes bright and full of hope.

"It's not like when she was married to Paul," Seth said, as if he'd read my mind. I startled and blinked.

"He drained her. Sucked up her life force like a fucking leach. But you…it's almost like…you're restoring her." Then he snorted and shrugged and took a swig of beer.

After about twenty minutes, I figured I'd given Bella enough time to get Maddie in bed, so I decided to head back inside and see if I could sneak her off somewhere and talk, make sure she was okay.

I thanked Seth for the beer and started back towards the house, the cool misty air sending shivers up my spine as I walked. A few short feet from the awning, I thought I heard voices coming from the back of the house. Curious, I walked quietly towards them. And then my heart beat picked up as I recognized the voices.

"…you didn't even give him a chance," Bella accused.

"Why should I?" Jake hissed in answer. "I know exactly who he is, and _what_ he is too. Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy," he snorted sarcastically. "Why should I give him a chance? You seem to be giving him more than enough chances for the both of us. Just like you did with Paul!"

My hands fisted at my sides. I started to walk closer, to make my presence known, but then I heard Bella's voice again.

"Stop comparing him to Paul! He is nothing like Paul!"

I stopped.

"He's _exactly_ like him! Right down to the god-damned cocky grin. And he's going to end up hurting you _just_ like Paul did! And he'll hurt Maddie too!"

"He would _never_" – she stopped, her voice shaking with anger – "He would never hurt Maddie. He loves her."

"Loves her," he drolled. "Guys like him don't love anyone but themselves."

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is!" Jake insisted. I heard him take a deep breath. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, soothing.

"Look Bella. I'm sorry about the other night. I shouldn't…I shouldn't have gone off on you the way I did. But he took me completely by surprise-"

"I know Jake," Bella interrupted, her voice calmer too. "But that was my fault. I should've told you a while ago-"

"Bella," he said with quiet desperation, "_Please_, just listen to me. I only…I only said those things because I care about you. Because I want to protect you from assholes like him. I can't stand the thought of you getting hurt again. And he _will_ hurt you Bella."

She didn't say anything. My pulse quickened, my blood pounded wildly between my ears.

"Were you already seeing him last time you came home?" he asked in a gentle voice.

"Sort of," she answered stiffly.

"Sort of," he repeated, pausing. "So how about those pictures that came out around that time, of him and that girl, what's her face, Tanya something or other?" His voice was careful, compassionate, laced with concern.

"I'm sorry Bella. I swear, I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm just trying to make you see-"

"Those pictures…it wasn't what it looked like-," Bella began.

"Jesus, do you hear yourself Bella? You're doing it _again_!" Jake accused. "Of course it wasn't what it looked like. Just like it was never what it looked like with Paul either, right?"

"HE. IS. NOT. PAUL!"

They were both quiet for a while. I could hear Bella's ragged breathing, mixing with the light wind and the rustling of the dry leaves. My mind twisted around and around, trying to determine what the best course of action would be; to step in and stop this shit right now, or to wait – and hope that Bella would have the strength to set Jake straight once and for all.

"Why'd you have to bring him?" Jake whispered in a pained voice. But I didn't have it in me to feel any modicum of pity for him.

"I brought him because he's important to me Jake," Bella answered, as if she were trying desperately to make him understand.

"I wanted my family and friends to meet him. Especially you and my dad." She paused. "I wanted you to get to know him."

He didn't respond. They were both completely silent for a long time. I started wondering if maybe they'd gone back inside.

"Nice earrings by the way," Jake suddenly said in a biting tone.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" she responded.

It took a few seconds before I heard him mutter "nothing," in reply.

_Prick_.

"Damn it Bella," he grunted abruptly. "Why can't you love me? Why can't you feel for me the way I feel for you?"

I brought my hands up to my hair and fisted it hard, turning around in a circle and trying to keep my brain from imploding. He had no right. No fucking right to keep after her.

"Jake," Bella breathed out. "Jake," she repeated gently. "You can't control who you love."

Silence.

"You'll always be my friend Jake," she reassured him. "And I'm grateful for you, and for how you've always been there for me. And I do love you Jake. I do. But I'm not _in_ love with you." She paused. "I'm in love…with Edward."

There it was, spelled out clearly for him. From my hidden position in the dark shadows, off to the side of Charlie Swan's little white house, I drew in a deep sigh of relief.

And did a mental fist-pump.

"And he's in love with me," Bella continued. "Please, try to understand that, for the sake of our friendship. Just…just talk to him. Get to know him, and then you'll see-"

"In love with you?" Jake snickered. "Any day now, he'll go back to his old games." He snorted. "That is, if he isn't _fucking_ around behind your back already. In love with you," he growled tauntingly, all softness and gentleness gone from his voice, "Bells babe, you're just one of many to him, and believe me, in a few weeks you'll be crying on my shoulder, wishing you would've listened to me."

Bella went silent. Once again, I debated staying in my spot versus rescuing her. As I looked around, weighing both options, my eyes landed on the small kitchen window overlooking the back yard.

Leah was watching the scene anxiously.

"We'll be leaving early Sunday," Bella finally said in a resigned tone. I turned away from Leah and the kitchen window and stared off into the trees that hid Bella and Jacob from my view. "If you want to…say goodbye to Maddie and me, you know where to find us."

I heard a set of footsteps receding, and the sound of the storm door creaking as it opened and slammed shut.

That was when I came out of the shadows.

I walked over to where Jacob stood alone, looking down at the ground, his shoulders sagging. He looked up as soon as he heard me approaching. His face twisted into a snarl.

"Well if it isn't the pretty boy himself. So you're a god damned snoop on top of everything else?" he sneered.

I stared at him silently.

Jacob snorted. "I wouldn't be so god-damned cocky if I were you. In a few weeks you'll be out of the picture and I'll be the one still here for her." He pounded his chest with his hand. "_I'll_ be the one comforting her."

I shook my head. "That's what you're hoping for isn't it? You're hoping I'll fuck up and hurt her. That way, you can swoop in and be the hero again."

_Fucking friend my ass_.

"I don't want you to hurt her. But it's who you fucking are. It's bound to happen."

I glared at him.

He snorted again. "What? You're gonna stand here and tell me that Edward Cullen, _Millionaire Playboy_ is done playing games? That you're willing to change for Bella?"

"Is that so hard to believe Jacob?" I asked incredulously. "You claim to care about her, to _love_ her, yet you find it so hard to believe that she'd be enough to change me."

He didn't respond. He just glared at me, nostrils flared, breathing hard.

"If you care about her so much," I asked, "what the hell was that shit over dinner? And now? Why are you purposely-"

"I'm trying to make her see that you aren't her knight in shining armor! _I_ was the one here when Paul fucked up on her!" He pounded his chest again. "_I_ was the one here for her!"

"And I'm grateful to you for that. I really am. But _I_ am here now. _I'm_ here to take care of her and Maddie. _I'm_ here to protect them. _I'm_ here to be the man they need.

He stalked over to me and stopped, inches away from my face, his black eyes narrowed and his breathing hard. His whole body shook with anger. He looked down at me, trying to intimidate me with his massive height and – fuck it, yeah, I was man enough to admit it – massive build. And while I could also admit that he'd probably take me if it came down to it, I could see in his eyes that he knew the truth. He knew the truth and he hated me even more for it.

Bella was mine. And he could pound me into the ground all he wanted; it wouldn't change that.

He jabbed his forefinger into my chest. But the truth burning in his eyes stopped me from grabbing it and breaking it.

"You _will_ fuck up. You'll fuck up and she'll come back to me."

"She was never yours Jake. She wasn't yours before Paul, she wasn't yours after. She never will be. And I'm telling you now, I will _never_ fuck up on Bella. She's it for me, plain and simple. You want to spend your life waiting for something that's never going to happen, that's your loss."

"Now you want to do me a favor?" I said, looking down at the finger digging into my chest.

His eyes tore into me, taking on a wild, feral look. He dug his finger in deeper, his breathing more erratic. And then abruptly, he hung his head and lowered his finger.

We stood silently for a long while, until he suddenly looked up at me, his eyes full of anguish.

And for a split second, I pitied him. I met his tortured gaze and I imagined myself in his position. Longing for Bella, knowing she'd never be mine. The thought alone was enough to send me into panic. The reality would kill me.

"Damn it Cullen, why? You could have any woman in that fucking city. Why'd you have to set your sights on Bella?" he asked in an anguished voice.

Any bit of pity I may have felt melted away.

"If you have to ask me that question, then you don't love Bella half as much as you seem to think you do."

He had nothing else to say.

Suddenly, I remembered the way Leah had been acting towards Bella since the moment I'd walked into the house this morning. The looks. The anger. The jealousy. The envy as she watched them through the small kitchen window.

I snorted. "You'll be just fine Jacob. Stop longing for someone thousands of miles away and open your eyes to what's right in front of you."

And with that I turned and walked away, leaving Jacob to sort out his misplaced feelings.

OOOOOOOOOO

After everyone finally left that night and Charlie went up to bed, Bella and I sat alone on the small sofa, the TV droning on in the background, though neither one of us was paying any attention to it.

It had been a long, exhausting day, and neither one of us knew exactly what to say. Finally Bella angled herself to me and threw her arms around my neck. I pulled her onto my lap and held her tight, digging my face into her hair and inhaling deeply.

"God Edward, I don't even know where to start apologizing."

I pulled her away and looked at her.

"Hey, didn't I tell you already? I don't want you apologizing to me. Besides, it wasn't that…bad."

She snorted. "Your family is so great to Maddie and me, and tonight" – she cringed – "you must think we're the most classless bunch of-"

"Stop it," I chided. "In the past twenty four hours I think I've figured out not to expect your dad to break out in song and dance for much. Maddie," I sighed, "Maddie's my princess. Seth" – I chuckled – "Seth is one of the most interesting people I've met in a long time. And Sue, - I shrugged – "I think Sue'll come around eventually."

I stopped, trying to figure out what to say about the other three people in attendance tonight.

Bella sighed deeply.

"Leah."

I smirked. "Yeah, she's really…something." What exactly, I wasn't sure.

Bella shook her head. "She's always been…a bit abrasive. But I have no idea what was going on with her tonight."

Yeah. I had a pretty good idea.

"Billy…" – she continued. "I think you can probably guess why Billy was so quiet all night."

She was right. At first, I'd thought he just shared the dislike for me that half of the people in attendance seemed to share. But then I'd caught him staring at me a few times when I interacted with Bella, or with Maddie. And it wasn't a hostile stare, like Jacob or Leah, or even a wary stare, like Sue. It was curious; thoughtful. And then it had hit me.

Billy was Paul's biological father. He'd once technically been Bella's father-in-law; and he was Maddie's biological grandfather.

It was strange; this quiet man who was undeniably kind to Bella and Maddie, but who you'd never guess was anything other than Charlie's friend.

"Billy's never known how to act around me since I found out he was Paul's father. And then after everything that happened with Paul…" – she sighed and shrugged – "I think he feels kind of guilty when I'm around, so he chooses to keep his distance. At first it bothered me, because technically Maddie's his granddaughter." She breathed in deeply. "But my dad loves her enough for two grandpas, so I guess it evens out."

I thought back to the way Carlisle was with Maddie. The way his eyes twinkled when he looked at her; the way he interacted with her and patiently answered her questions. _'How's Maddie? Is everything okay with Maddie?_' he'd asked me the last few times I'd spoken to him, true affection and concern in his deep blue eyes.

Bella drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "Jake."

I snorted and sat back against the sofa.

"Yeah. Jake," I repeated, letting the name fall from my lips like a dirty word.

She looked down and played with her hands. I put one hand over both of hers, stilling her nervous movements.

"I heard you…outside with him," I admitted.

She lifted her brows but didn't say anything. I moved my face closer to hers.

"Bella…you know that what he was said isn't true, right? You know I won't hurt you that way."

She searched my eyes before answering. "Yes Edward, I do know that. In my heart, I know that. But…I'd hoped that once he met you he'd realize how different from Paul you are."

"But it's not _him_ that needs to realize that Bella. You see that, don't you?"

She smiled and moved in to kiss me.

"Yes Edward, I do," she said as she pulled away. She sighed deeply again. "I still hope he'll come around. He's my friend, and I want him to be happy."

I thought of the way Leah had been looking at him all night.

"Don't worry love," I murmured soothingly. "I've got a feeling Jake'll be just fine."

I lay down across the sofa and pulled Bella with me. Her arms and legs tangled with mine and her head rested against my chest. Our bodies molded to each other, soft against hard, and the whole day instantly melted away until all that was left was Bella and me on this sofa. I dug my face into her hair and inhaled deeply, placing a kiss on her head. Chief Swan's heavy footsteps be damned; I wasn't letting go of Bella tonight.

Because this was what I'd endured this admittedly shitty evening for. For _this _ending.

"Love?"

"Yes?"

"You think you can bake me another one of those Pecan Pies? Between your dad and Seth, I barely got a sliver."

Bella chuckled sluggishly and kissed my chest. "I'll bake you whatever you want when we get home."

_Home_. I held her tighter. This wasn't her home anymore. Her home was back in New York. With me.

Outside, the rain pummeled the little house insistently, falling on the roof with heavy patters, like hundreds of little drums all pounding at once. The long day finally took its toll and Bella's breathing slowed, and there, exhausted, wrapped in each other and fully clothed, Bella and I fell asleep.

OOOOOOOOOO

_**(Rerun of '**__**Access: New York**__**,' celebrity gossip show, playing on the TV in the background while Edward and Bella sleep.)**_

_**Woman**__: "And welcome back! Well, the mystery's unraveling more and more each minute! This morning's paper gave us a glimpse of sexy Edward Cullen and his new 'it' girl waiting to catch a flight to Washington State for the Thanksgiving Holiday." _

_**Man, grinning at woman:**__ "And this afternoon sources tell us that the girl you and every other woman in this country will be envying for the next few weeks – or days, or even hours" he chuckles, "knowing how Eddie C. operates – is none other than a Graphic Artist at Eddie's own Ad Agency, CCW. _

_**Woman, chuckling towards man before smiling at the camera:**__ "That's right Tom. The lucky girl's name is Isabella Swan, and our sources tell us that although she's been at CCW for less than four months, she's already heading some of that agency's biggest accounts." Woman looks at man sardonically. "Now do you think that speaks for her advertising skills, or for her 'other' skills?"_

_**(Woman winks at camera. Shocked 'Ohs' and loud laughter erupts off-camera.)**_

_**Man, chuckling:**__ "Maybe a little bit of both?" he says with a raised eyebrow._

_**(More off-camera snickers.)**_

_**Woman, snorting:**__ "Yeah. Maybe." Thoughtful look crosses woman's face. "Although...I don't know Tom. Did you see the way they were looking at each other in those pictures?" _

_**(Flash to picture of Edward and Bella at airport, walking hand in hand, Bella looking up at Edward and him meeting her gaze.)**_

"_I think there might actually be some genuine feelings there!" Woman quips._

_**Man snorts**__: "Well then someone needs to send Ms. Swan a memo – stat. I think most New York women at this point know better than to expect more than a casual relationship from Eddie."_

_**Woman laughs:**__ "Well __**I still **__envy her!"_

_**Man:**__ "Oh we all know you do! I don't think many of us have forgotten the drool incident after that picture surfaced of Eddie running around the park shirtless this summer!"_

_**(Flash to picture of Edward running around the Central Park jogging track in shorts and no shirt.)**_

_**Woman groans and grips tightly to the edges of the counter she's sitting behind:**_

"_Uuuhh…" _

_**(She closes her eyes and drops her head, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. Loud laughter erupts off-screen.)**_

_**Man, rolling his eyes:**__ "Anyway, like I was saying, I think someone needs to warn this girl! I mean, even through the grainy black and white pictures on Page Six this morning you could see the blush on her face! I'm not sure she knows what she's getting herself into!" he snickers._

_**Woman looks thoughtful**__: "I don't know Tom. How 'bout those pictures last week of him at the coffee shop in Long Island?" _

_**(Flash to picture of Edward and Bella at Starbucks in Long Island.) **_

"_Check out that look on his face! I hate to say it, but I'm thinking Eddie might be in the big 'L' word here!"_

_**Man, looking skeptical and waving his arms in front of him:**__ "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on for a sec Phoebe! We don't want to start any rumors here! I mean, I'm not even sure Eddie knows how to spell the 'L' word! We're talking about the same guy that dated Tanya Denali, Bridget Lang and Marissa Vega – at the same time!"_

_(__**Laughing off-screen again. Flash to pictures of Tanya, Bridget and Marissa – all beautiful, famous women from Edward's past.)**_

_**Woman looks contrite:**__ "Alright, alright. But I still say this might be the real deal. She may not be as glamorous as Tanya or any of the other girls he's dated, but she's pretty cute. And maybe he's looking for something different."_

_**Man smirks.**_

_**Woman:**__ "Well, he sure looks fond of her kid." _

_**(Flash to picture at airport of Edward holding Maddie on his lap, her face dug deep into his coat as he holds her protectively against him.)**_

_**Man purses his lips, still skeptical, and then his expression becomes challenging.**_

"_I'll make you a bet Phoebe. I give it 'til Christmas. If they've broken up by then, I get to cover the premiere of the next installment of our favorite vampire saga. If they're still together, you get to cover it!"_

_**Woman: **__"Ooh yeah! Pattinson here I come!" (She bounces up and down in her seat.)_

_**Man:**__ "Settle down Phoebe. Settle down."_

_**(Music signaling upcoming commercial starts playing.)**_

_**Woman:**__ "I wonder what Tanya Denali thinks about all of this? I don't think I ever saw him look at her the way he's been looking at Is-a-bell-a!" she chimes, twisting around in her seat._

_**Man, grinning expectantly:**__ "Well if she really is yesterday's news, I've got two words for you baby: Cat fight!"_

_**(Laughter all around and fade to commercial)**_

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**A/N: As far as I know, there is no such show as 'Access: New York.'**

**Reviews help Edward feel better about his crappy Turkey Day. Leave one please and thank you.**

**Bella's POV next.**


	27. Ch 25 Brittle Seashells & Strong Hearts

**A/N: Late post this week. But better late than never, right?**

**I didn't get a chance to get back to many of you on your last reviews. I apologize, but please know I've read and appreciate every single one. I'd really, really appreciate a review after this chapter, since we're getting close to reaching a BIG milestone!**

**Once again, this hasn't been betad. Please excuse any errors, grammatical or otherwise.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Ch. 26 –Brittle Seashells & Strong Hearts**

Chapter Song Rec: _Resistance_ - Muse

**BPOV**

Friday morning after Thanksgiving, Edward, Maddie and I forewent Black Friday Christmas shopping and donned raincoats and rain boots to the cold, wet beach instead. The three of us walked hand in hand by the shore as misty drops of rain circled us, and we laughed at the cold water lapping at our well-insulated feet. Then Maddie and Edward walked around the beach together, parallel tracks of feet – one tiny set and one large set – leaving deep imprints in the dark sand. They sorted carefully through smooth rocks and broken seashells, looking for perfect souvenirs to take home. Maddie picked one seashell for each person she missed back home, handing them to Edward to hold. It was quite a collection – for her babysitter and her friends, for all of Edward's family, and even Eli was represented there. Then they picked another bunch for them to keep for themselves. I sat and watched them with my arms wrapped around my legs. When they were done, Maddie went to play by the water again, and Edward came to sit next to me.

"Close your eyes," he said playfully. I obeyed. He took my hand and placed something cold and smooth in the middle of my palm. When I opened my eyes back up, a perfect seashell, with swirls of white and cream, rested in my hand.

"It's the prettiest one we found," Edward assured me, grinning his beautiful crooked grin.

I traced its smoothness with my finger, tears stinging my eyes as the waves rolled soothingly in the background. I did love my sapphire earrings, and even the frighteningly beautiful matching necklace, but this…

"It's perfect. Thank you."

When we got back to Charlie's, he was waiting for us to go Christmas tree hunting. Edward bowed out, claiming he needed to send out some emails for work, but I caught the look that passed between him and Charlie. And even though my dad didn't say anything, I knew he was grateful for the time alone with Maddie and me.

Later that evening, Sue, Seth and Seth's girlfriend Jolie joined us for Thanksgiving leftovers. Seth introduced her proudly to Edward and me, and the girl practically gasped aloud when she took in Edward and all his perfection. He hadn't shaved, and he was all day-old stubble and faded jeans and flannel shirt. _You think this is something? Picture him in an Armani suit_, I felt like whispering to her conspiratorially. And then I chuckled to myself. I couldn't really blame the girl for staring, though I was admittedly happy that she was enough into her own boyfriend for the rest of the evening - mostly. I was dating one of the most strikingly beautiful men on the planet – open ogling was just part of the package.

In this quieter and less stressful setting, Sue slowly but surely began to warm up to Edward. I smiled when I saw her stealing curious-but-not-quite-so-wary-anymore glances at him over the dinner table as he joked around with Seth and his girlfriend, and even my dad at times. While we watched Home Alone, Edward picked me up and twirled me around the living room when they started playing 'Rocking around the Christmas Tree,' and I laughed and laughed despite myself, even as I tripped over his graceful feet. And then he stopped me over an imaginary piece of mistletoe and kissed me. Maddie came to join us and Edward picked her up in his arms and danced with the both of us. And then Seth and Jolie got in on the fun. Through it all, Sue watched us.

"Hey Chief, why don't you give Sue a twirl there?" Edward suggested.

"I don't dance," Charlie mumbled, hiding behind his newspaper.

Edward gave me a quick wink and guided Maddie and me back to the sofa, and without warning and to everyone's shock, he picked up Sue's hand and led her to the middle of the floor. Sue was too surprised to offer any resistance, and then I knew she was a goner. I laughed out loud. Poor Sue, she'd been fighting a losing battle from the beginning.

Eventually Charlie hesitantly and slightly begrudgingly stood up, and took Sue from Edward, leaving me with my mouth hanging open as I watched him moving awkwardly. He shot Edward a hard glare, but then his mustache twitched and I thought I saw him give a slight nod of gratitude in his direction.

No one who spent time with Edward could help but love him.

Well, no one but Jake and Leah apparently.

Saturday my dad and Edward kept their promise to Maddie and took her fishing, and _I_ bowed out of that one. The three of them returned smelling like fishes themselves, and Edward once again rubbed himself all over me, making me squeal and scream and laugh all at once. When he finally excused himself to go take a shower, I caught Charlie staring at me. He stood there for a long while, and then took a deep breath and smiled – one of his quiet but meaningful smiles.

All was almost perfect, other than the obvious absence of Jake and Leah.

And other than Sunday morning.

After making sure everything was packed, I came down Sunday morning and found Edward sitting alone at the kitchen table nursing a cup of coffee and scowling over the newspaper. My dad had taken Maddie for one last nature walk.

"What is it?" I frowned.

Edward crumpled up the paper and stalked over to the garbage bin, throwing it out. He walked over to the coffee maker and wordlessly poured me a cup, placing it on the table and pulling out a chair for me. I sat down and stared at the cup, the steam swirling and disappearing into the air. I looked over at him. He was studying his mug, his eyebrows drawn tightly together.

Quickly, I got up and went for the trash.

"Bella!" Edward called, the chair scraping against the linoleum as he moved hastily to stop me. Somehow he beat me to the garbage, placing himself in front of it.

"Let me see it," I said calmly.

"It's just friggin' garbage Bella," he hissed. "It's not even worth the paper it's printed on."

"Well, I want to see it anyway," I said evenly, meeting his gaze. He stood rigidly, no intention of letting me by. I crossed my arms and tapped my foot, waiting. Edward narrowed his eyes, glaring at me, but somehow I managed to stand my ground.

Eventually, he sucked his teeth and blew out a large gust of air, and then slowly turned and pulled the crumpled paper out of the garbage. He turned back to me with an irritated expression. I had to practically snatch the paper out of his hand. I un-crumpled it and lay it across the counter while Edward stood next to me, watching me read.

…_Ms. Swan is apparently an employee at CCW, the ad agency Mr. Cullen started five years ago with brother Emmett Cullen and college friend Jasper Whitlock. In the past five years, CCW has become one of the top ten ad agencies in the country. Sources tell us that Ms. Swan currently manages more than one of the agency's top accounts, including the high profile and multi-million dollar EverSoft account. This is a surprising feat, considering Ms. Swan has only been with the agency for a little less than four months. CCW is a privately-owned agency, and as such, hiring and account placement are conducted at the owners' discretion, with no shareholders to answer to. With this new development and relationship, it remains to be seen whether current hiring and account placement practices at CCW continue to be based on merit and talent, or based on some form of nepotism, and how this will affect the agency._

"Sources tell us, my ass," Edward growled, tapping the appropriate sentence angrily with his forefinger. "Those asshole Cartwrights are obviously the fucking sources. You work your ass off for that account and for those assholes. They've got no right to say that shit." His usually velvety voice was husky and shaking.

It hurt. It really did hurt to read that, because I _did_ work my ass off for that account, as well as for every other account I worked on in the agency. But now, because my relationship with Edward had become public, it would all be questioned. I'd more or less expected something like this to happen, but it still stung. I bit my lip and kept my eyes on the paper, the words jumbling and mixing together as my mind tried to put the article into perspective. Something, other than the obvious, seemed off about the article.

I looked at the top of the grainy black and white paper as it crackled in my hands. I tried to smooth it out to read it better. The New York Times Sunday Edition. Where had this come from? Charlie didn't read The Times.

And then it hit me; what had seemed off about this particular article.

It wasn't on Page Six. It was in the Business Section of The New York Times.

"I'm sorry Bella," Edward whispered. "I just…I didn't think they'd be so-"

He turned towards the counter and banged one fisted hand against it. "Fuck!" he hissed. His shoulders tensed up and his head hung down.

And anger took hold in my chest.

Not so much for me. But Edward and CCW had received countless awards and recognitions from the marketing community, year after year since the agency's inception. True, Edward had spent the last few years with the media following his every move – but only as it related to his love life; his girlfriends, his partying, his bachelor boy antics. Edward's abilities as part owner and executive at CCW had never been questioned.

Until now.

Now, according to the media, he was putting his girlfriend in charge of accounts she had no business managing.

That pissed me off, because Edward didn't deserve that. As much as he claimed I'd worked my ass off for the accounts I handled, _he'd_ worked _his_ ass off for _years_ for that agency. It was his heart and soul, and he was part of the reason it was the success story it was today. He'd earned every bit of praise he received from the marketing industry, and for the media to turn around now and suggest he'd risk the company's success…

I flung the paper off to the side somewhere and then moved behind Edward, wrapping my arms around his waist and running my hands under his ribbed sweater. He was breathing hard, and I moved my hands up and down his abs, soothing him, feeling every dip and groove from his tight stomach. I could feel his anger, and I pressed myself tighter against him.

"Edward," I said in a low voice. "We knew things were going to be said once our relationship became public." I kissed his back. "But it'll pass and…everyone'll realize that you'd never jeopardize the reputation of the agency-"

He turned himself around in my arms, glaring down at me.

"You think I'm worried about how this looks for _me_?"

I met his angry eyes. "Well they're implying you're promoting based on nepotism-"

His green eyes became steely. He took my chin in his hand, gently but firmly. "I don't give a damn what they imply about me. But the shit they've been saying about you, _about Maddie,_" - he added through clenched teeth. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

When he opened them back up he found me glaring back at him. I removed his hand from my chin and folded my arms in front of me.

"Well _I_ care what they say about you. I thought you said you were seeing things differently now Edward. I thought it mattered to you now when the press claims something about you that isn't true."

He put his hands on my shoulders gently. "It does Bella, but-"

I raised a hand to his chin now. "I thought you and I were in this together."

He sighed heavily. "We are Bella. We are."

"Look, I'm not going to lie and pretend that" - I glanced towards the paper that lay crumpled on the floor – "_that_ doesn't…sting a little. But I knew this was going to happen Edward." I drew in a deep breath. "And I've been preparing myself for it." I grabbed his hands and brought them down between us.

"And as long as you still think this is worth it…then we'll deal with it…together." I shrugged and looked down. _If he was already finding this too much to deal with…_

His arms locked around my waist and he picked me up off the floor, holding me flush against him. I threw my arms around his strong shoulders.

He buried his head into my neck, kissing it adamantly, his lips firm and determined. He groaned and trailed them up to my ear.

"Bella, you are worth anything and everything. Don't ever doubt that. Of course we'll deal with it together." I tightened my grip around his shoulders, resting my head on them. He sighed. "But love, it might get worse before it gets better," he whispered with a tentative warning.

But there in his arms, I knew nothing could ever get so bad. Not as long as he held me this way. I could fight against the whole world as long as he held me like this.

"I guess…the good thing about everyone watching, is that they'll _all_ be able to see how wrong they are."

He held me impossibly tighter, rubbing his jaw up and down the side of my face. He hadn't shaved today, and his stubble scratched me wonderfully, igniting a familiar longing inside. We hadn't made love since the night before our trip, and God I wanted him badly. It was as if, now that I knew what making love with him was like, I craved it; that closeness, that connection as if we were one body. I'd never known being with someone could be like that. It had definitely never been like that with Paul. With him, it had always been an instant gratification; not a _need_ as basic as water and air.

As if reading my mind, Edward turned us around and placed me on the counter. I parted my legs to make room for him. His hands trailed up and got lost in my hair, caressing my scalp gently and raising goose bumps all up and down my arms. He pulled back to look at me. His eyes were dark and agitated.

"I'm sorry I acted like such an ass now," he whispered contritely. "I just…I had a good time here Bella, I did. But I'm just _really_ ready to take you and Maddie back home." He looked down, still looking unsettled. "And I don't want our return to be ruined by the god-damned media."

I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him in closer and trying to distract him. I could feel him hardening against me. I hid my face against his chest and failed badly at suppressing a moan, because as much as I was trying to distract him, I was starting to make myself light-headed here.

"I'm ready to go home too Edward," I whispered into his chest, "and I for one don't plan on letting the media ruin anything tonight."

He picked my head up off his chest and cradled it between his hands, and then he brought his mouth to mine quickly, sucking insistently on my lips, first one then the other, before parting them with his tongue. When he shifted his hips against me, both of us let out an insuppressible moan. There was desperation in the way he held me, in the way he kissed me, and it made me want to bring him even closer.

"I'm sorry I'm so irritable this morning Bella, but _God_ I miss you," Edward whispered roughly against my lips. He pushed himself deeper into me, in case I didn't get his meaning.

But I knew exactly what he meant.

"Stop apologizing," I breathed weakly. "I miss you too."

How could four days feel _so_ long when I'd gone over four years without?

Then the front door opened loudly, and Maddie's footsteps broke us apart. Edward hurried back to the table to sit down and hide his very noticeable hard-on, and I hopped off the counter and started cleaning up while I tried to regulate my breathing again. I picked up the paper from the floor, re-crumpled it, and threw it back in the garbage. Maddie ran to show me the few leaves and more rocks she'd collected during her walk with her grandfather, and then I heard Charlie walk into the kitchen. I kept my back turned to him until I could catch my breath and feel the excess color drain from my face.

He cleared his throat. "You guys about ready to go?"

"Yes Chief," Edward answered, his voice never betraying the fact that he'd been grinding himself into the Chief's daughter a few seconds ago. "We're ready to go."

I prayed I was the only one that had caught the double meaning in Edward's words.

A little over an hour later, at the small Port Angeles airport, we said our goodbyes.

Charlie hugged Maddie tightly. "Now you be a good girl and listen to your mom.

"Okay Grampa."

"And make sure you hang those leaves we picked on your Christmas tree."

"I will grampa."

"And hold mommy's hand and…and Edward's, when you're walking around in that city."

I raised my brows, but Charlie kept his eyes on his granddaughter.

"Edwood and mommy swing me like a swing when I hold the-uh hands," Maddie giggled.

"Alright then," Charlie nodded, giving Maddie one more quick hug before standing up to face me.

"You take care over there now," he said gravely.

"I will Charlie."

"Hmm."

"You watch what you eat Dad. Cut down on those burgers and eat some more of the veggies Sue makes you."

"Yeah, sure, sure."

"And be careful at work."

"Always am Bells."

"Hmm."

I gave him a hug, which he returned with one arm. "Love you dad."

"Love you too Bells."

And then, Charlie moved to face Edward.

They both stared at each other for a few moments.

Finally Charlie stuck his hand out to shake Edward's. "It was good to meet you Edward."

"It was good to meet you Chief. Thanks for…everything."

Charlie cleared his throat. "And uh…regardless what the crime rate statistics over in Brooklyn are, you make sure that door's locked at night, no matter what side of it you're on."

"Yes Chief. I will."

"You take care of my girls over there."

A look passed between them. "I will sir- Charlie." There was a deep reverence in Edward's voice when he answered, as if Charlie had just knighted him, or handed him a couple of Faberge eggs to watch over.

Charlie patted Edward on the shoulder once, and then turned to leave. The three of us started walking towards our gate.

"Bella!"

I turned back and caught Jake walking quickly towards us.

"Uncoe Jake!" Maddie yelled and ran to her uncle. She'd missed him these past couple of days, wondering aloud why he hadn't come to see her.

He picked her up and gave her a kiss on the forehead, and then walked slowly back to where I was standing with Edward.

"Bella." His voice was apologetic, and he glanced at Edward once before turning his eyes back to me. "I couldn't let you leave without…without saying bye."

"Jake," I said simply. "I'm glad you came." Then I reached up and hugged him tight. He returned the hug awkwardly, with Maddie still in his arms. When I pulled back he met my eyes sadly.

"I'm sorry," he blurted out. "About the other day. About…lots of things." He glanced at Edward again, his expression hardening. "But I can't help worrying about you."

I felt Edward stiffen next to me, and then exhale loudly.

"Bella, I'll wait for you by security," Edward said coolly, and then started to walk away.

"Edwood, wait fuh me!" Maddie cried, wriggling to free herself from Jake's arms. He kissed her head quickly before lowering her. I watched her skip over to Edward and take his hand and then together they walked away.

I turned back to Jake and sighed. "Jake, I know you worry about us, but you can't keep doing this. Edward is not your enemy. And he's not a danger. To Maddie or me."

Jake looked at me with a pained expression. Then he drew in a deep breath and let it out heavily. He looked down at the floor.

"I just…I just need some time here Bells, _please,_" he pleaded. "Just give me some time to get used to this. I'll try. I swear I'll try. But I'm still going to worry, because I don't trust him, and I can't pretend I do."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he kept talking.

"But I don't want…this to come between us Bells. Just tell me this isn't going to come between us…between our friendship. Because no matter what else Bells, I _need_ your friendship."

I smiled sadly and raised a hand to squeeze his huge bicep, waiting for his eyes to meet mine.

"Jake, you're my family. You will _always_ have my friendship." He let out a huge sigh of relief. "But Edward is a big part of me and Maddie's lives now…and if you don't want our friendship to suffer, then you have to accept that, even if you don't like it."

For a split second he met my eyes with a look of resistance, even defiance, before unwilling acceptance crossed his features, and he bowed his head and nodded once.

I hugged him one last time. He returned the hug carefully, with less intensity than when he'd greeted me on Thanksgiving.

"Bye Jake." I pulled away. "Call me okay?"

"Yeah?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah," I smiled.

"Will _he_ answer?" he smirked.

"He might," I shrugged honestly.

He sighed. "Alright."

OOOOOOOOOO

"_Ladies and gentleman, welcome to JFK International Airport. Local time is eight twenty-three pm, and the temperature is forty-one degrees Fahrenheit with clear skies and…"_

I stared out the small darkened window of the airplane as it made its arc towards our assigned runway. The airport lights twinkled brightly under the evening sky, the thick paned glass distorting their brilliance until they looked like small bright flames, dancing in the dark along with the butterflies in my stomach. Take-off and landing had never been my favorite parts of a flight, and it had felt exactly the same here in first class as it had always felt in coach. I wouldn't tell Edward that though; I'd already teased him enough about our first class seats – though at least the flight attendants hadn't offered him a back rub on this leg of our trip.

A shot of warm air suddenly tickled the side of my face, near my neck, bringing an automatic smile to my lips and waking up the butterflies that had started to recede, only this time their little dance felt much more pleasant as Edward's lips trailed softly up and down the side of my face. I tightened my grip on his hand as his thumb traced soothing circles on the inside of my palm. He was quiet though, thoughtful, as he'd been through most of the flight. I could tell that, as anxious as he was to return, he was equally anxious about what we'd be returning to.

"…_please check around your seat for any personal belongings you may have brought on board with you…"_

I reached into the pocket on the back of the seat in front of me and sifted through the in-flight magazines and emergency barf bags, searching until my fingers felt the smooth and brittle ridges of Maddie's seashells inside the small plastic Ziploc bag. They rattled like little pebbles when I took them out. I leaned down to stick them carefully in one of the side pockets of my carry-on. My own perfect seashell was wrapped carefully in tissue and zipped safely in one of the other pockets.

Edward watched me and chuckled, bringing his mouth near my ear again. The sensation sent a shiver up my spine.

"Make sure we don't forget those or she'll be heartbroken and I'll have to fly her back to Washington just to collect some more," he whispered. He probably would too. He ran tender fingers through Maddie's long hair, where she lay asleep across both our laps, her head over Edward's and her feet over mine. Once again, first class had been rendered null in this situation; when Maddie got sleepy, it was Edward's lap she climbed on, fully reclining seats or not.

He pulled away to look at me, his green eyes glowing mischievously in the darkened cabin. I was glad to see it. Jake showing up at the airport had sort of ruined his mood this morning.

Edward's spirits seemed to improve even more once we deplaned to a rather quiet homecoming. With Maddie still asleep, I held her in my arms while Edward collected all our luggage, and then with a big grin in my direction he followed me through the sliding glass doors and out to the cab service area of the terminal.

And out to the waiting photographers.

As soon as we stepped through the doors, they descended like a swarm of bees drawn to nectar, and the flash of lights blinded me to the point where I stood frozen, no idea where to go or what to do. And then someone drew Maddie's hood over her head and grabbed my hand tightly, pulling me towards the line for the waiting cabs. My senses suddenly returned and I looked up at Edward's furious face. He shook his head and returned my gaze, his jaw locked tight and his nostrils flaring.

"Edward, how was your Thanksgiving weekend?"

"Isabella, how long have you and Edward been dating?"

"What's your little girl's name?"

"How long have you two been dating?"

"Isabella, what's in Washington?"

"Edward, how serious is this relationship?"

What's the little girl's name Isabella?"

"How old is she?"

"Edward what about Tanya? Is it over for real this time?"

I flinched, not knowing what to do, where to look, how to react. And with every question, every flash, Edward's face grew darker and darker. The cab line moved slowly, while my pulse raced and my heart felt as if it would beat out of my chest.

"Isabella, how old is your daughter?"

"Isabella, is it true you're in charge of one of CCW's biggest accounts, and if so, how did you manage that in such a short period of time?"

Edward's head whipped back, his eyes narrowed in a murderous glare. And when they landed on the enquirer of the last set of questions, he dropped all our bags, withdrew his hand from mine, and stalked over to the unlucky man.

He moved into the photographer's face. "Don't you _EVER fucking_ ask about her daughter, or about her work, or insinuate _shit _about how she earned it! You understand?"

The photographer stared back at him, mouth hanging open, while the rest of them were practically tripping over each other to catch snap after snap of what was going on.

"DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" Edward bellowed again when the photographer failed to answer. I quickly turned to look at the cab line. It wasn't even moving anymore; travelers and cabbies alike frozen as they watched tonight's entertainment.

Somehow, I forced myself to unfreeze and moved quickly to grab Edward's hand. I tried to pull him towards the cab, but he didn't even budge. He wouldn't even look at me; his enraged gaze still locked on the photographer.

"Edward, let's go," I said quietly, looking up at him and trying to pull him again. But it was no use. He was so much bigger than me, and with Maddie still shockingly asleep in my other arm, it was all I could do not to drop her as I used all the strength I had in my other arm to try to pull Edward away.

"Edward, let's go!" I said more forcefully, tugging him as hard as I could. The frantic tone of my voice must've gotten to him, because he blinked twice before looking down at me, and then closed his eyes tightly and exhaled through his nostrils before opening them back up. When he did, he nodded tersely. I held Maddie with both arms again and moved back towards the cab line. Behind me, I could hear Edward picking up our luggage, but the cameras kept flashing and the passengers and cabbies kept staring. Frustrated, I skipped everyone still gaping at us on line and went straight to the next available cab and climbed in with Maddie. A loud banging on the back of the cab made me jump.

"OPEN THE GODDAMNED TRUNK UP!" Edward growled at the cabbie.

The cabbie startled out of his gaping and pushed the button to open the trunk for Edward. He threw our luggage in and climbed in the cab next to me.

"Downtown Brooklyn!" he commanded. The cabbie sped off, leaving a trail of flashing lights behind us. Edward leaned over and threw his head between his hands, while I sat back and waited for my heartbeat to recede to something resembling normalcy.

OOOOOOOOOO

I placed Maddie gently on her bed, removing her clothes carefully and changing her into a warm pair of footed pajamas. The long weekend and flight had left her exhausted, and from experience I knew it would take her a couple of days to recover. She'd be sluggish for the next forty eight hours or so. I turned her lamp off and walked out of her room, quietly closing her door behind me.

In the living room, Edward stood like a statue by the window, staring across at the bright neon sign for Ming's Dynasty Restaurant, his masculine shoulders rigid and his hands tucked deep into his pockets. I sucked in a breath through narrowed lips and walked slowly towards him. He heard me approach but didn't turn. Tentatively, I reached my arms around him and stuck one hand in each pocket, meeting his hands and weaving my fingers between his in the tightly enclosed space. I pressed myself into his hard back, sharing the heat emanating from him.

Slowly, his stiff posture relaxed a bit, and he dropped his head with a heavy sigh.

"God Bella, I don't even know what to say."

I didn't say anything. Instead, like this morning, I pressed a kiss to his back. And then another. And then another. Softly. Until I felt him shudder and relax even more.

He chuckled humorlessly. "I'm not so sure you'd want to kiss me if you knew how much worse I've probably just made things for us."

It was true. I knew it was true. It was the golden rule of advertising: get noticed. Draw attention to it and it will sell. Well, we'd drawn plenty of attention tonight. The papers would be selling left and right tomorrow.

"Shit, I'm such an ass," he breathed through clenched teeth. "But fuck, when they started asking all those questions about Maddie, and then about you and work," – he exhaled heavily, his shoulders stiffening again – "I couldn't take it."

"Edward, we knew," I reminded him gently. "We knew there'd be questions."

He groaned. "I know Bella. I guess…I guess I was just so gung ho about going public, like you said a few days ago, that I didn't really stop and think of what that would mean."

I stiffened. "So…what now? You regret going public?" _Was that all it would take?_

He removed our hands from his pockets and untwined our fingers. He turned around and placed his hands on my shoulders, trailing them across my collarbone, over my neck, and then resting them firmly on my face. His eyes seared into me.

"Look at me. I don't regret going public. I regret the way I'm handling it. I regret not doing a better job at shielding you and Maddie from all those assholes." He waved wildly towards the window, as if said assholes were waiting right under it. Which I sincerely hoped wasn't the case.

He snorted angrily, but his eyes seemed to fill with something like admiration. "I mean, look at you." He tightened his grip on my face. "I'm over there yelling like a god-damned maniac, and you're all cool and collected." He snorted again. "Seriously, if it hadn't been for you…"

I took his hands in mine again. "I wasn't half as calm as you seem to think I was," I admitted. "But like I said, I was expecting this. I mean, yeah it bothers me, and I hate them asking about Maddie, and implying things about work." I snorted. "I'd rather they keep comparing me to the tall, gorgeous women you've dated before. At least I know that's true." He rolled his eyes. "Edward," I gazed at him evenly, "I've had worse things implied about me. Maybe not in a setting as big as this one, but in a setting where I knew most of the people spreading the rumors. Believe me, that hurts even more. And I'm hoping Rosalie was right and this won't last forever. So…" – I shrugged – "I think _I _can weather it." I inched my face closer to his, looking deep into his emerald eyes. "The question is, can _you_?"

He frowned and tilted his head in confusion.

"Edward _that's_ what's scared me from the very beginning. That you'll…realize that…this is all _so much more trouble than it's worth_. That you can easily go back to a much less complicated life with…people…who don't want or need to be shielded from the media. To a life where no one questions _why_ you're with whomever you're with. And then…" I lowered my head and shook it, unable to finish my thought.

Didn't he realize it wasn't what _they_ said that scared me, it was _his_ reaction to it?

My face was quickly between his hands again.

"Oh Jesus Bella." He pulled me close and kissed my mouth. "Oh fuck." He kissed my cheek. "I'm so sorry love. I never meant to-" He kissed my forehead roughly. "_Damn it,_ I'm trying to take care of you, and instead I make things even worse. I'm sorry I lost it back there Bella," he murmured, his green eyes blazing apologetically, his mouth moving against my lips as he spoke. "But I swear, it's just because I _need_ to take care of you and Maddie, not because I can't…weather this." I closed my eyes, relief flooding me even though I hadn't even realized how tightly I'd been wound up by fear. He spoke against my lips again.

"I swear, I'll try to control myself better next time," he whispered vehemently, kissing one eyelid and then the other. "I won't scare you like that again. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

And then he was kissing me roughly all over my face, anywhere his mouth landed. I wound my arms tightly around his neck. "Stop apologizing," I whispered, kissing him back the same way. The long day, the scene at the airport, the long weekend – all hit me at once and suddenly I was filled with a desperate need. "Just…hold me, just…"

His hands came down to my bottom and he picked me up and I wrapped my legs around him. Our mouths met, desperate and frenzied, tongues and teeth clashing together wildly. And then my back hit a wall – hard. I gasped, more surprised than hurt and Edward looked up instantly contrite, but when I dug my hands into his hair and pulled forcefully, his expression changed. I pulled his mouth back on mine, loud moans and groans escaping both our lips. With no fanfare or preamble and in one smooth motion he lifted my sweater and pushed my bra up, and brought his mouth down. I gasped and arched my back instinctively, pushing myself deeper into his mouth, unable to control the sounds emanating from me.

"Edward…bedroom," I managed to whisper. He was hurrying us towards the bedroom before the words were even completely out, his mouth still licking and kissing my chest. In one quick motion I pulled my sweater and bra off and dropped them somewhere on the way before pulling Edward's sweater up and somehow awkwardly getting it off of him. I discarded his somewhere too and then pressed my chest against his, running my hands along his sculpted shoulders, the heat between us growing and burning me deliciously.

Then my back was against my bedroom door and Edward's mouth was everywhere at once, on my mouth, kissing and licking and biting my neck, and then trailing to my breasts. I fisted his hair in my hands as he ground himself into me unapologetically, making my back bang against the door over and over again.

"Ungh Edward…_please_…" I begged shamelessly, the burn inside growing and spreading.

"What love?" he murmured, his tongue flitting in and out of my ear, "Tell me what you want. I'll give you whatever you want." His hips pressed against me back and forth and around and around.

"I want you," I answered breathlessly.

"You have me." He brought his mouth back to mine, sucking on my lips almost roughly.

He wanted me to say it.

"I want you…inside me…please…now…"

In a split second, my back was bouncing on the bed, and Edward was standing over me, gazing down at me with dark primitive eyes, licking his lips and driving me mad with want. I sat up and pulled him frantically over me, then he was kissing me again and his dexterous fingers were unbuttoning my pants and pulling down the zipper with desperation. My pants and panties flew off in one fluid movement. I helped him repeat the same actions with his own pants and boxers.

"Edward…" I moaned, when I felt him _so _close, _so_ _hard_ against my bare thigh. "Please Edward…" I lowered my hand between us and wrapped it around him. He groaned into my neck.

"Bella…" he groaned. "Put me where you need me…"

Without waiting to be asked twice, I guided him where I needed him the most and with one quick thrust he pushed himself inside.

"Ungh!"

"Uuh!"

His hips moved fast and urgently, and I met them with my own urgency, the need from the past few days allowing no room for pacing ourselves or tenderness. We were fulfilling a basic desire right now, a need for each other on the most fundamental level, but still necessary all the same.

My fingers trailed down his back, tightening around his hips, already damp from his efforts. And his hands tugged at my hair, wrapping it around his fingers and fisting it in his palm. He pushed and I pulled, over and over again while the waves of pleasure consumed us and carried us away.

He kissed me wildly, his heavy pants getting lost inside my mouth. "Bella…I…don't think I can last much longer…I need you _too much_…" His forehead creased with the effort to hold back for me, and his next thrust was _hard_, deep, insistent, and then I was crying out his name when the pleasure became so intense it was just too too much. A couple of seconds later I felt his warmth fill me, and then he collapsed, his body falling heavily over me.

We lay there panting, trying to catch our breaths. He rolled off of me, but his arms pulled me into his side and held me against him, ghosting his lips over the top of my head. After a few minutes, I pulled away from his chest to look at him. The blissful, exhausted look on his face filled me with satisfaction, that _I_ could give him that. He smiled at me and then pushed a few strands of hair off of my face gently.

"I'm sorry if that was a bit too…intense."

I chuckled lightly. "Are you seriously apologizing for that?"

He snorted, looking slightly embarrassed. "I wasn't very gentle."

"Edward, that suited me perfectly right now. I'm not made out of porcelain, you know."

He gazed at me, his finger tracing my eyes, my nose, my mouth. "You're not, are you?" He sighed. "You are amazing on so many levels, you know that?" Then he kissed me softly, tenderly this time. "I love you Isabella Marie Swan."

"I love you too Edward Anthony Cullen."

OOOOOOOOOO

_Monday, November 29, 2010_

_PAGE SIX_

_Eddie Loses His Cool at JFK!_

_It's all over TMZ and every media outlet in the city today guys. Millionaire Playboy Eddie C. totally lost his cool last night while on a cab line at JFK with new girlfriend Isabella Swan. _

_Apparently, a once quite verbal and spotlight lovin' Eddie got upset when the various reporters there to greet him and Isabella home after their Thanksgiving Holiday asked Isabella one too many questions. An enraged Eddie yelled at the shocked reporter and told him never to ask about Swan's daughter, or about recent implications that Swan's status as Eddie's flavor of the season have earned her top accounts at Eddie's advertising agency, CCW. Isabella works as a Graphic Artist at the agency. It's still unclear how long the two have been dating._

_An obviously nervous Isabella quickly tugged on her boyfriend's hand and may have prevented an incident that would've landed our favorite playboy in serious trouble. They then got in a cab and sped off, probably to Isabella's place, since reporters staking out Eddie's Upper West Side digs never got ahold of him last night._

_One witness to the incident said, "Cullen looked as if he were about to pull a Sean Penn out there. And his poor girlfriend was as red as a tomato!"_

_From what we've seen since Eddie and Isabella have gone public, he is extremely protective of this new relationship, and of Isabella and her daughter. A fact that doesn't bode well for Tanya Denali, heiress to the Denali chain of high class hotels, if she had any designs on being 'on-again' with Eddie any time in the near future!_

_Video of the incident is all over the internet this morning, including TMZ and YouTube, where it's received well over two hundred thousand hits already. _

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**A/N: Have you ever been on YouTube? **

**Reviews are better than having your dirty laundry aired on TMZ. **


	28. Chapter 27 Big Girls Don't Cry

**A/N: Alright guys, hope you like them long and meaty (ahem - I'm talking about the chapter length guys), because this one is both.**

**This chapter here sort of starts setting up some of the stuff that'll take us to the end of this story. I'd say we're about five sixths of the way through...**

**I've got the first couple of chapters for my next story written out, and I figure I'll start posting that when I'm sure there's only two or three chapters left in this one. So put me on Author and Story Alert if you're interested in reading that.**

**Also, one of my lovely readers, Elliania, has done me the wonderful favor of creating a BANNER for this story! Woohoo! It is absolutely lovely! Please go to my Profile page for the link to it. I think you're all going to love it! Thank you so much once again Elliania – I am totally wowed by the detail!**

**I hope my beta returns to me one day, but once again, this is unbetad. Please excuse any errors, grammatical and/or otherwise.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I've just moved them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 27 - Big Girls Don't Cry**

**Chapter Song Recs: **

_**Firework **_**by Katy Perry  
**_**Absolutely (Story of a Girl)**_** by Nine Days**

**BPOV**

The yellow cab made a left onto Sixtieth Street, leading onto Fifth Avenue, and cutting off another cab in the process. The other driver flipped our driver off, a stream of silent expletives clearly visible through the closed cab windows.

"Yeah, same to you buddy," our cabbie grumbled, before entering the roundabout with the huge water fountain in the middle. In the past few days, Columbus Circle had been dressed up with hundreds of holiday lights. But even the festive beauty of the area, the mixture of turn-of-the-century gothic architecture and modern day glass skyscrapers adorned with large wreaths and light, wasn't enough to calm my jittery nerves.

In the back seat of the cab, I turned away from the window dressings and rested my head on Edward's shoulder instead. He was busy replying to messages on his Blackberry. When I felt his lips brush the top of my head, I closed my eyes, relishing in the quiet before the storm.

The Christmas song playing on the radio ended with the sound of bells jingling in the background, and the energetic voice of the deejay came on air.

'_And welcome back to the Z-one-oh-seven Morning Show! This is Becky Breck, and well, Turkey Day's behind us, all leftovers are a memory, and it's time to start making our Christmas lists. Hey Greg, what do you think is at the top of the list for our favorite resident millionaire playboy, Eddie C., this morning?'_

My eyes flew open and Edward stiffened beside me.

'_Oh I know!'_ answered Greg eagerly. _'A magic little button that'll stop people like you from replaying that darn YouTube video of him at JFK last night over and over! Jeez, haven't you gotten enough of that yet?'_

"Turn the radio off," Edward snarled. The cabbie ignored him; too busy not signaling as he weaved from one lane of traffic into the other.

Becky laughed. '_I thought a happy, grinning Edward was hot, but hot dang, a furious, protective Eddie's even hotter!'_

Greg snorted. _'Yeah sure. Just don't ask him about anything related to his new girl Isabella, or her little critter!'_

'_Maybe I will,'_ Becky challenged. '_I wouldn't mind him wrapping those big strong hands around my neck! As for that Isabella…I'm not so sure how I feel about her. Always got that sullen, red-faced thing going on. Now is it an 'I'm so shy' red-face, or a 'You guys are pissing me off and better get those cameras out of my face' red-face?_

'_Whatever kind of red-face it is, it's definitely helping her rise through them ranks at Eddie's ad agency quickly!' _

On the radio, they all burst out laughing.

"Turn. The radio. Off. Now," Edward growled in a low voice that reverberated throughout his body and seeped into me.

I gave his hand a squeeze and lifted my face to find his. His features were tight and stony, but then they turned apologetic. He smiled ruefully, lifting my hand to his mouth and kissing it.

"Sorry love."

He was trying hard, I knew he was, but we were all over this morning's newspapers and talk shows; a furious, barely controlled playboy and a woman exploiting her relationship with him to further her career.

Edward paid the cab driver and we got out, the hustle and bustle of the early New York City morning filling our senses. None of it was enough to hide the eagerly flashing cameras across the street though. With solemn faces, we made our way through the revolving doors into the tall, glass building housing the offices for CCW.

The transformation from plain old winter to holiday season had also taken place inside the atrium. Huge wreaths hung from the glass walls, pointy stars bigger than me dangled from the soaring ceiling, familiar Christmas tunes played quietly in the background. If it weren't for the less-than-subtle stares that followed us across the atrium towards the elevators, I may have been sucked in by all the holiday cheer.

"At least there are no cameras in here," I smiled with relief while we waited for the elevators.

He shook his head. "They're not allowed," he murmured quietly. "It's part of the contract we signed with the building when we leased the space for our offices."

"Oh."

The elevator ride was slow and awkward. Edward and I stood next to each other silently, flanked by curious stares. I didn't dare touch him, but the warmth of his nearness calmed me. When the elevator finally reached my floor, Edward quietly reached out before the doors opened and secretly squeezed my hand. _'I'll see you later. I love you. I'll miss you.'_

I'd barely been at my cubicle for ten minutes, checking my emails, when Lauren walked in. I locked my eyes on the laptop before me, hoping she'd take the hint and go away.

No such luck.

She walked in closer, her short skirt riding up higher as she leaned against my desk and crossed her bare legs at her ankles.

"So Bella, how was your Thanksgiving break?"

"Pretty good," I said evenly, without looking her way. She wasn't fooling me with the small talk. "And yours?"

She chuckled. "Not as…eventful as yours apparently."

I drew in a deep breath and let it out, slowly turning to face her. She was smiling dryly.

"Is there something specific I can help you with?" I said.

She glared at me, still smiling. "No. Nothing specific."

We stared icicles at each other.

"Then if there's nothing else, I have work I need to do," I said.

"Of course," she snickered, straightening herself up and not bothering to adjust her skirt. "Obviously, you've been _doing_ more than your fair share around here lately."

I refused to acknowledge her comment with an answer. This seemed to get to her.

She snorted angrily. "See you later Isabella," she called out as she stalked out of my cubicle.

The phone rang as she walked out.

"Bella!" Alice's cheery voice exclaimed over the phone.

"Hey Alice," I said, genuinely happy to hear from her. She'd called a couple of times while we were in Forks but I hadn't had time to have a real conversation with her. "How was the rest of your weekend?"

"Good, but we missed you! Rose dragged Esme and me all over the City on Friday, picking up things for the baby. The kid's not even the size of a pea and it's already got a wardrobe to rival mine!" I chuckled. "After that we barely had enough time to go hunt for material for the bridesmaid dresses." She sighed. "Don't worry, we didn't find anything. We can try again this weekend."

"Oh goody," I said, rolling my eyes.

We both chuckled. The conversation segued into an obvious silence.

"So what in the world happened at the airport?" Alice finally squeaked out.

I sighed heavily. "Can we not talk about that?"

"Jesus Bella, he looked like he was ready to wrap that camera belt around the photographer's neck!" she snorted. "I called him a little while ago but Ange said he's been in a meeting with Rose and Emmett and Jasper all morning."

"He has?" I asked, surprised.

"Yup. Knowing Rose, she's tearing him a new hole right now."

I closed my eyes and cringed.

Alice and I spoke a little longer and then she promised to stop by for lunch. My hand rested on the phone after we hung up. I couldn't help thinking how Edward wouldn't be going through any of this if he were with anyone else. He'd disagree, I knew he would, but it didn't stop me from thinking it.

For the rest of the morning, I let myself get lost in my work. I placed a phone call to John Cartwright, reminding him about the meeting we had scheduled for next week. While I spoke to him, I couldn't help thinking about what Edward had said; that the Cartwrights had probably been the 'source' for that article over the weekend in the New York Times. But John Cartwright sounded so cheery, so pleased with my performance on his account so far. I had a hard time reconciling the excited man on the line with the one who'd insinuated the less-than-flattering comments in the paper.

A little before noon, Rosalie popped her head in my cubicle.

"Hey Bella. Do you mind coming into my office for a minute?" She turned back without waiting for an answer.

I sucked in a deep breath and followed. Once we were in her office, she closed the door behind her.

"Had a good time back in Washington?" she asked, taking a seat on her leather sofa instead of behind her desk.

I took a seat opposite her. "For the most part. And you guys? How was your weekend?"

"Pfft!" She snorted. "Alice dragged Esme and me all over the City on Friday hunting for material for the god-damned bridesmaid dresses. I swear, you'd think the wedding's next week! After that we barely had time to pick up a couple of things for the baby," she complained, rubbing her still-flat belly tenderly.

"Oh…"

I'd have to talk to Esme for the real story.

Silence.

She looked at me and raised an eyebrow. "So that was quite a little show the paparazzi got last night, huh?" She smirked. "Can't say Edward doesn't keep things interesting."

I looked down and shook my head.

"He just…they started asking questions he didn't like and-"

She raised both brows and snorted. "Bella, they're _always_ going to ask questions he doesn't like. Edward knows that. He's courted the media for years; they're not going to back off now just because he's decided he wants some privacy."

I wanted to defend Edward, but wasn't sure what to say.

Rose sighed and continued. "Look Bella, I asked you in here because the way you two handle the attention you get in the next few weeks will have a direct impact on this agency."

I drew in a deep breath.

"Rose, the last thing I want to do is jeopardize the agency's reputation. I've enjoyed the time I've spent on the EverSoft account, but…if you think it's best for the agency if I step down-"

Rosalie's eyes flashed. "Are you insane? Is that what you thought I was going to say?"

"Well, I just thought that…"

She pursed her lips and spoke in a tight voice.

"Bella, I just spent two hours in a conference with this agency's heads, and if there was one thing we all agreed on, is that you are staying on that account."

"I just don't want anyone implying that Edward is-"

"Oh cut the crap Bella!" she cried out, throwing up her arms in exasperation. "Edward's a big boy; he can take care of himself! He's up there going into hysterics worrying about _you!_"

She rolled her eyes before huffing impatiently. "My point is, _you_ are going to have to grow some big cojones here girlie, and grow'em quick, because Edward seems to be under the impression that you need to be handled with kid gloves, and that is _so_ _not_ the way we roll around here."

"I can take care of myself," I grumbled, hearing the tone of indignation in my voice.

She grinned at my expression. "I know that. If I didn't, I never would've hired you, and I sure as hell wouldn't have let you head some of our biggest accounts! You don't fool me with that red-faced bullshit."

I jerked my head back, startled. "I'm not trying to fool anyone," I said steadily. "I just…I don't want everyone thinking I'm getting special treatment."

She chuckled, which sort of irritated me. "You keep doing the work you're doing, and no one's going to think that for long."

I bit my lip.

Rose rolled her eyes. "Bella, I just spent two fucking hours in a conference with Edward, trying to make him see that he's going to have to bring that Cullen protective streak down a notch. But you're going to have to hold your own here too Bella. Now I've seen you take on the Cartwrights, and Lauren, and fuck, even me at times. So go get those big girl panties on and show'em all, including your boyfriend there, what you're really made of!"

"I have my big girl panties on!" I cried.

A few moments of silence followed, and then Rosalie's expression changed. She slowly reached out for my hand and squeezed it hard.

"When I hired you Bella, it wasn't just because I liked your designs. It was because I saw something more there. I put you on the EverSoft Account even though Lauren and James had seniority" - she met my eyes intently – "because I saw a spark in you, and _I knew_ that when the time came, that spark would ignite and you'd show everybody what you're really made of." She straightened herself up. "Well Bella, that time's come." She squeezed my hand again, almost painfully, and her eyes narrowed.

"We can easily take you off the accounts and you can go back to working on the minor ones," she said in a deceivingly soothing tone. "You'll still have your job; you and Edward can continue your relationship without having to worry about the media or anyone else in this office talking smack about your accounts. Everything can be fine and dandy and…uncomplicated." She shrugged, her eyes boring into mine.

"So tell me Isabella Swan. Is that really what you want?"

I met her demanding gaze, her eyes daring me; testing me.

I shook my head. "No Rosalie. That is _not_ what I want."

She stared at me for a few seconds longer, searching, and then her lips turned up in a smug grin. "No, I didn't think it was." Then she shook her head.

"Lordy Bella, don't ever let people take things away from you that easily. You _fight_ for what's yours. That account is yours, fair and square. Unless you fuck it up."

I stared at her, and her eyes softened. "Look Bella, you've become one of my best friends in the past few months. We go out for lunch, we hang out together, and when the work day's over tonight, I've got ton of shit to talk to you about." Abruptly, she turned her head to the side and patted the middle of her chest. "For example, I've got this son-of-a-bitch heartburn lately I just can't get rid of." Then she looked back up at me sheepishly. "But here in the office, it's business."

"I know that Rose," I chuckled, and put my other hand on top of hers. "I truly appreciate that with you, I always know where I stand. And drink plenty of milk. It'll help with the heartburn."

She nodded once. "Plenty of milk. Got it. I should probably cut down on those baked beans for breakfast too, huh?"

OOOOOOOOOO

The rest of the day went pretty much as expected. Every time I left my cubicle, I'd be followed around by whispers and stares, some more covert than others, some more curious than malicious. I tried to ignore them as much as possible, Rose's words ringing in my head.

'…_keep doing the work you're doing, keep doing the work you're doing…'_

More than ever, I was determined to work my butt off on those accounts.

When the work day was over, I finally called Edward.

"I missed you love," he whispered as soon as he picked up. He sounded tired, and his voice was muffled, as if he was holding the phone very close to his mouth. Still, the sound of his voice sent butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

"I missed you too," I whispered back, even though I was sure everyone in the cubicles around me had left already.

"Come upstairs. I'll be ready in a few minutes."

I agreed and hung up.

When I walked into Edward's office, I was momentarily startled to see two men sitting on the guest chairs opposite Edward's desk.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't realize…" I began.

All three men stood up when I walked in, adjusting the buttons on their suit jackets. Edward's dad was one of the men, but the other one I didn't recognize. Something about him looked familiar though; something in the hair, in the eyes…

Edward came around his desk to meet me, his expression a mixture of relief and anxiousness. He took my hand and squeezed it tight, grinning at me crookedly. All the stress of the day suddenly didn't feel so bad anymore. The way he sighed made me think maybe he felt the same.

"Bella, how are you?" Carlisle asked from just behind Edward. I moved my eyes to him.

"Carlisle. I'm pretty good, thanks. How are you?"

"Not too bad," he responded, but his eyes quickly flashed up to Edward. I thought I saw a look pass between them.

Edward cleared his throat, signaling with his arm towards the other man in the room. "Bella, this is my Uncle, Aro Volturi."

Edward's uncle moved around his chair to come meet me. And then I realized why he looked so familiar; he had a vague resemblance to Esme…and even Edward.

He smiled at me pleasantly, almost with amusement, and then took my hand away from Edward and held it tightly between both of his. My eyes widened in surprise. Edward had spoken fondly a few times of his uncle, and he'd told me he had a sometimes colorful way of expressing himself.

"Well, well, well!" he exclaimed. "If it ain't P-L-Double-G herself, in person!"

Beside me, I heard Edward groan lightly. I smiled and furrowed my brows.

"I'm sorry?" I asked.

"Don't mind my uncle," Edward smirked before pulling my hand out of his uncle's hands. Mr. Volturi chuckled.

"Well now I see why my nephew looks happier than a tick on a fat dog! Just look at you!"

I felt my face blush bright crimson.

"Aro…" Edward said in a warning tone.

"Well it's true!" his uncle mused. "You're so sweet-lookin' my tooth is starting to ache!"

"Aro…" Carlisle warned this time.

"Alright, alright" – Aro chuckled again – "but it's true. Them tabloid pictures and that video didn't do her justice." My face flamed brighter.

Edward took my hand again. "She _is_ beautiful. But you're making her uncomfortable."

Aro smiled sheepishly. "Well then, I will stop. Bella, it is lovely to finally meet you. I've heard loads about you from my sister and nephew."

"I've heard a lot about you also Mr. Volturi, and it's good to meet you too," I smiled.

"Aww shit!" he cried, chuckling heartily. "What's my godson been sayin' about me? Whatever it is, it's not true! And if it is, I had a good reason for it!" He winked at me in a totally exaggerated manner.

I laughed hard, unable to hold back. Edward's uncle had an infectious way about him.

Edward smirked and rolled his eyes.

"Will you look at those eyes..." Aro mused quietly, staring at me as I tried to get a hold of myself again. "Boy Edward, you weren't kiddin' about them eyes…" He kept staring. My laughter died down and I bit my lip, looking away.

"Doing it again, aren't I? Well, I've got to run anyway," he said apologetically. "These bank mergers got me busier than a three-peckered billygoat at a sheep-breeding contest" – I let out another uncontrollable chortle – "but I just had to meet the girl that's got all the women in this city either wanting to kill you or be you right now."

Again, I was speechless.

Edward drew in a deep breath next to me and shook his head.

And then abruptly, he pulled my hand away from Edward again, holding it tightly once more between his.

"Now don't you pay any mind to the gossip mongers in this city. They're just so jealous they can't see straight. You keep that pretty brunette head held high and don't worry about what they say. They ain't got no dogs in this fight."

And although I'd only understood about half of what he said, I squeezed his hand back gratefully.

"Thanks Mr. Volturi."

He frowned. "Call me Aro. Only those I'm about to crush call me Mr. Volturi."

"Oh, uhm...okay…Aro."

"Much better," he smiled. He let go of my hand and turned abruptly towards Edward.

"Edward, don't forget what we talked about. You make sure you get that taken care of ASAP." There was a sudden urgency in his tone that completely transformed him.

Edward's expression matched his uncle's. "I will Uncle Aro." He sighed. "And thanks…I hadn't even thought of that." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair.

"Yeah well, that's why I make the big bucks." He tapped his head with his forefinger. "I think of those things others neglect to."

Edward nodded sharply.

Aro walked away and then Carlisle came to stand in front of Edward.

"We'll talk more later son." He put a hand on Edward's shoulder. "Just take it easy. Remember what I told you a few weeks ago; treat them like you'd treat a bully."

Edward smirked. "Beat the shit out of them?"

Carlisle sighed.

Edward chuckled humorlessly. "I'm just kidding dad. I know what you mean."

Carlisle gave me a hug, and then he and Edward's uncle left.

OOOOOOOOOO

"Edwood, mommy," Maddie said in between mouthfuls of her dinner, "Juliana says she's going with _her_ mommy and daddy to see a _biiig_ twee get its lights on. She says it's the biggest twee evuh! And they sing songs, and skate, and Miley Cywus 'posed to be theuh!"

"I guess she's going to see the Rockefeller Christmas Tree," Edward grinned at her.

His mood had greatly improved once we'd picked Maddie up this evening. And once we'd settled in for dinner around our small table, his rigid shoulders had visibly relaxed as he listened to Maddie intently while she filled us in on her day.

But tonight, Edward would be going home after dinner. He hadn't been back at his own place since the night before our trip to Washington. I didn't want him to go, but I forced myself to remember that he still had a life outside of Maddie and me.

"What's the Wockafehwa Chwistmas twee?"

Edward flashed his emerald eyes in my direction.

"Well we can tell you…or," he smiled, "we can show you." He looked directly at me; it was a question as much as a statement.

But Maddie was already jumping up and down on her seat. "Oh peez! Peez can we go too? I want to see the twee like Juliana!"

"It's a big media event," Edward said quietly in my direction, before answering Maddie.

I looked at my daughter's bright, excited eyes.

I could either let the media run my life for as long as this crazy circus lasted, let them take this away from my daughter.

Or I could do what Rose said, and fight for what was mine.

I swallowed. "We can't hide from them forever. But…I understand if you're still upset about last night-"

He cut me off and reached for my hand across the table. "I'm only upset because of myself. It doesn't mean I want to hide. What I want," he smiled, "is to take you and the little princess here to see your first Rockefeller Christmas tree."

I smiled and he kissed my hand. Maddie watched our exchange like a tennis match spectator.

"Can we go see the twee?" she asked impatiently.

Edward grinned over at her, rumpling her hair. "Yes princess. We're going to see the tree."

"Yay!" Maddie yelled, bouncing her approval so hard she almost fell out of her seat.

OOOOOOOOOO

Before Edward left, he read Maddie a bedtime story, and then we spent forty-five minutes by the door trying to say our evening goodbyes for the first time in days. We kissed, and kissing led to touching and moaning and more kissing and touching.

"I don't know how I'm going to sleep without you tonight," he murmured nibbling on my ear, while he leaned against the closed door. I shuddered and pressed my body deeper into his.

"I _know_ I won't." I let my hands trail up to his soft, silky hair. He groaned.

"I don't want to go."

"Then stay." I turned my head and placed open mouthed kisses on his neck, nipping lightly and pulling on his bronze hair. God, he tasted so good. If his taste could be bottled, it would have to be regulated by the FDA as an addictive substance.

He groaned again, and hesitated before answering. "I've just…_oh damn love that feels so good_…I've got to take care of some stuff back at my place. And anyway, I've got no clothes left here."

He lifted my head away from his neck with one hand and brought his mouth down to mine, sucking on my top lip and then my bottom, before letting his tongue find its way into my mouth. I whimpered and my legs turned to jelly. Edward held me up with one arm around my waist.

Part of me couldn't understand what he had to take care of that he couldn't do from here, but at the same time I knew how selfish that sounded, even in my mind. So I didn't ask.

Instead I said against his lips, "Maybe…maybe you can bring a few extra suits next time…some extra jeans and stuff?"

"Are you sure?" He brought his lips down to my jaw, trailing down my throat. I could feel him smiling against me.

"Yes," I answered breathlessly.

He chuckled, pulling back to look in my eyes. "Aren't you tired of having me around all the time yet?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Are you tired of being around all the time?

"Never."

"Ditto." And then we kissed and touched for another forty-five minutes before he eventually left.

I took a lonely bath afterwards. Then I lay in bed and tried to do some reading while I waited for Edward to call me and tell me he was home. The bed felt unusually cold tonight. No matter how much I twisted and turned from side to side with my book, on my stomach, with the covers on, with the covers off, I couldn't get comfortable or warm. Giving up on the book, I turned the TV on and channel surfed.

'…_Cullen and Isabella Swan arrived together this morning at the midtown office of CCW Advertising. The couple ignored the cameras as they made their way inside the building. Isabella seems to have a serious problem with smiling, and Edward, 'til recently a notorious attention lover, has been avoiding the media lately, and went as far as verbally abusing a photographer yesterday evening-'_

The now infamous video replayed on the screen, and I quickly turned the TV off.

I sighed heavily. Just then, the phone rang.

With a wave of relief running through me, I pounced on the bedside table and picked up the phone.

"Edward," I breathed, a slow smile creeping over my lips.

No answer.

"Edward?"

Again no answer. I could hear someone breathing over the line.

"Jake?"

Nothing. The sound of movement on the other line was the only indication that there was someone there.

"Hello?" I tried again.

Silence.

I pressed the 'Off' button. The phone sat in my hand for a few seconds. Biting my lip, I scrolled through the Caller ID. I hadn't even bothered to check when I'd picked up the phone anxiously.

**UNAVAILABLE**

The phone rang again in my hand, and I jumped, the bed creaking under me. This time though, the Caller ID confirmed it was Edward.

"Edward?"

His familiar chuckle came on the line. "Yes. Were you sleeping?'

I let his voice calm me. "No. I was…reading. Hey, did you just call?"

"You mean, before right now?"

"Yes."

"No."

I was quiet for a couple of seconds, thinking.

"Bella is everything okay?"

"Yeah, sure. It's just" – I sighed – "Someone called a couple of minutes ago and I thought it was you."

"Who was it?"

"I don't know. They didn't answer."

"Could it have been Alice or…Jake, or your dad?"

"No," I said slowly. "The number came up unavailable and then…" I paused, trying to think things through.

"Then what?' Edward asked. He was starting to sound worried. And then I felt stupid. It was just a dumb crank call and I was here worrying Edward now for no reason.

So much for those big girl panties.

"It was nothing," I said dismissively. "It must've just been a wrong number."

He was silent for a moment. "Look, I took care of everything I needed to take care of around here. I could be back at your place in forty-five minutes."

As much as I wanted him back, I didn't want him thinking he needed to protect me from absolutely everything that went bump in the night. I was twenty-six years old for the love of God. I had a four-year old daughter I'd been raising on my own since her birth, and I'd taken care of myself for over a decade now.

"Edward, it's late. Both of us need to get up early tomorrow. I miss you, but it wouldn't make sense for you to trek all the way back to Brooklyn now."

He breathed heavily into the phone. "I don't care if it makes sense or not."

"Edward, I'm fine. Stay home."

He snorted. "Now it just sounds like you don't want me there."

I chuckled. "You know I do."

"Hmm. Well…you made sure the door was locked?"

I groaned. "Oh God, don't you start with that too!"

He laughed. "Hey, you're dad's right about that!"

"Yes Chief Cullen. The door is locked."

OOOOOOOOOO

The next morning the Page Six headline, as well as the headlines on a couple of other sections of the New York papers, were all about the meeting Edward and the rest of the CCW heads had had the day before. According to the papers, they'd all met to reprimand Edward for promoting me to the EverSoft account when I'd only been with the agency for a few months, and to decide what to do with me now. And along with that were pictures of Edward and I hurrying into the tall, glass building where the CCW offices were.

This morning's talk show had also been kind enough to spend a full five minutes discussing the fact that I never seemed to smile, that of all the girlfriends Edward had ever had, I seemed to be the least vivacious.

They actually used the word vivacious.

That although I was pretty enough, according to the sprightly blonde hosting the talk show, they were having a hard time picturing Edward Cullen, Millionaire Playboy, with such a sullen, stiff girl. Of course, then the comparisons with a few of his exes began, ending with Tanya. I shut the TV off and finished making breakfast before Maddie skipped into the living room.

Edward was livid again, of course. And since I'd told him I'd spoken to John Cartwright yesterday and mentioned he was in a meeting with the other heads, he was now more convinced than ever that it was the Cartwright brothers who were feeding the information to the media.

"It doesn't make sense though Edward," I said to him, as we drove back to Brooklyn after work. I stared thoughtfully out the passenger side window, my vision blurring over the bland yellow walls of the tunnel.

I turned to him. "If they're unhappy with my performance, why don't they just say something?"

Edward glared angrily out the front windshield. "They're not unhappy with your performance Bella." He shook his head, his top lip twisting up. "This is all about sales love. All this extra attention to their company increases interest in their brands. Increases sales. They love you." He chuckled sarcastically. "And they love how this is keeping their company name in the public eye. They couldn't ask for better free advertising," he grimaced in disgust.

Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that we were missing something.

Edward reached across the console and grabbed my hand, weaving his fingers in between mine.

"It'll get better love," he sighed. "I promise."

'_Big girl panties. Big girl panties.'_

_OOOOOOOOOO_

The next day it _was_ slightly better; at work at least. The past couple of days had given most of the people in the office some time to get used to the idea that Edward and I were involved in more than just a working relationship. The whispers and stares lessened, and by the end of the day, I actually felt like I could breathe when I walked around the office.

I waited for Edward in the building atrium at the end of the day, watching the light show of the large crystal snowflakes hanging from the ceiling, shining brightly as they changed color, from white to blue to red, over and over. We were taking Maddie to see the lighting of the Rockefeller Christmas tree tonight. As much as I hated the thought of the invasive media getting pictures of my baby now, I couldn't keep her indoors. I'd have to find a way to keep her life as normal as possible until the media frenzy died down.

"Hey Bella. Enjoying the Christmas lights?" a familiar voiced asked.

I pulled my eyes away from the snowflakes above. James stood in front of me, grinning.

"Oh, hi James. Yes, they certainly decorate beautifully around here for the holidays."

Since my relationship with Edward had become public, James hadn't really spoken to me much, other than a few work-related conversations here and there.

He stared at me for a few moments. I moved my laptop bag from one arm to the other awkwardly.

"So…got any plans for tonight?"

"Uh…yes, actually. We're going to see the tree lighting?" I figured he'd probably know what tree I was referring to.

He nodded his head slowly. "The tree lighting. Would you like some company?"

I jerked my head back, surprised by his forwardness, especially now that he knew about Edward and me.

"Actually, Edward and I-"

He cut me off with a chuckle. "I'm just joking Bella. I've been quite aware for a while now that _our_ _boss_ doesn't like to see me within fifty feet of you. I used to think it was because I stood a chance. But now…" He snorted.

The taunt in his expression irritated me. "It was never a competition," I answered evenly. He could take it however he wanted to.

He nodded again and chuckled, smiling coolly. "No, I suppose it wasn't. So… how long have you two been together?"

I hesitated before answering. "A couple of months."

He raised his brows. "Really? Wow, isn't that like, a record or something for him?" he snickered.

I guess the look I gave him must've informed him I didn't find his comment humorous. His chuckles died down and he cleared his throat.

"I mean, who knows how long it's going to last right? Might as well get what you can out of it now."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What exactly does that mean?"

He jerked his head back. "No, I'm just saying, unlike Lauren, I totally understand where you're coming from. I mean, come on, who does she think she's fooling? She would've tried the same thing if she would've been in your position."

"In my position?"

"Sure," he continued easily. "And all those damn hypocrites in the media, making it seem like you're the bad guy. They all know how Edward operates." He leaned in and whispered in my ear, "I mean, they don't call him _Millionaire Playboy_ for nothing, right?" he chuckled before pulling away.

I felt the blood pool to my face. "James, I'm not sure what you think-"

"Bella, is there a problem?"

Out of nowhere, Edward had materialized behind James, with a look of pure murder on his face.

James turned around swiftly, his face drained of all color. "Edward, I…"

"Bella?" Edward repeated, keeping his eyes on me.

"Edward, no. Everything's fine."

"You look upset," he said icily, still not acknowledging James.

I glanced quickly at James. The things he'd just insinuated brought a thick taste of bile to my throat. But he looked terrified now. And Edward…Edward looked like he was just waiting for the signal to beat the ever-living crap out of him.

"I…I was just telling Bella to watch herself in that crowd over at Rockefeller tonight. Those tourists can get really pushy." His eyes pleaded with me not to give him away.

Edward glared at James for a few seconds, not at all taken in by his stammered speech. With his jaw set straight, he came to stand next to me and took my bag. He placed his hand on the small of my back.

"Thanks for your concern, but it's not necessary. _I'll _take good care of her while we're there, _and_ afterwards." His voice was as smooth as velvet, which somehow made it all the more threatening.

'Uh, okay," James answered nervously. He set his tense eyes on me. "Have a good night Bella."

"_We_ definitely will," Edward answered evenly, and then with his hand on my back, he guided us out to the street.

OOOOOOOOOO

James had been correct about one thing, at least. The crowds at Rockefeller Center were…insane.

Literally hundreds of thousands of people were crammed into the plaza, all impatiently awaiting the flickering of lights on an enormous Norway Spruce that had been standing on a private front yard until a few days ago. You could feel the eager anticipation in the cold, winter air. But the cold just added to the excitement, to the reminder that it was the holiday season in New York.

The plaza was bathed in brightness; every bare tree in the area had been blanketed with thousands of twinkling white bulbs wrapped tightly around each and every branch and tree trunk. The skyscrapers were lit up like giant candles. The waterfall next to the skating rink, lit up from underneath with thousands of more lights, glowed brilliantly, while the golden statue of the Greek god Prometheus, protector of mankind, lay majestically over it. The entire plaza twinkled brightly in the night sky.

In the middle, the star of the night - the tree - waited quietly for someone to flip the switch.

Edward carried Maddie on his shoulders as we made our way through the crowds, searching for Esme and Carlisle, as well Rose and Emmett. Alice would meet us later; her dance class ran late tonight. We'd pulled Maddie out of class for this event, and Alice had made us promise to bring her over this weekend to make up for it. They were putting on a Christmas production of 'The Nutracker' in three weeks, and Maddie had to practice her sugar plumming.

Edward held on tightly to my hand; it would be easy to get separated in this crowd. When we finally broke through the horde, I was momentarily surprised to see we'd descended to the ice-rink level. The rest of Edward's family waited for us a few feet away, seated behind a red rope. Curiously enough, there were no throngs of people pushing and shoving here. Only a few recognizable faces sitting comfortably; pretty close to where most of the events would be taking place tonight.

When a man in a heavy black jacket with a microphone in his ear let us through, I realized we were in an area where most people weren't allowed.

Once we were seated, Edward looked at me and grinned.

I frowned quizzically. "What is this?"

He shrugged sheepishly. "VIP area. We could either watch from here," – he pointed at the mob of people tightly packed one level above us – "or we could try to watch from there."

I stared at the jam of squished bodies above, pushing and pulling. In the back of my mind, the slightly hypocritical nature of our comfy seats - when we'd been so anxious to stay out of the public eye – didn't escape me. But looking at the jam of bodies above us…I couldn't find it in me to object.

Maddie was dressed in a holiday outfit that the Cullen woman had picked up for her during their Christmas shopping spree last weekend. Turning down the Cullen's constant displays of extreme generosity was getting embarrassing. So I'd accepted it graciously, trying not to keep a running tab in my head of how much this family had already spent on Maddie and me. I couldn't even start to add the airline tickets and jewelry to the list or else I'd feel like fainting.

So Maddie ran around in her pretty red velvet dress with a matching red and white coat and matching cap that snuggled her entire head and ears, and a red velvet muff to keep her hands warm. Only the very center of her tiny caramel face remained uncovered, and Edward and I both did our best to keep her close to us at first, and away from the constantly flashing cameras. But Maddie refused to cooperate. She flitted carefree from one lap to another, laughing and giggling. After a short while, Edward and I turned to each other with a look of resignation and let her continue with her playing, climbing on and off of Edward's lap, onto Esme's, then Rose's, then hoisting herself on top of a laughing Emmett's shoulders, and coming to a surprising rest on Carlisle's lap once Miley made her appearance. I only hoped the show everyone had come to see proved to be more interesting than the one my four-year-old daughter was putting on.

And then the ginormous tree was lit, its thousands upon thousands of lights glowing in the night sky like stars. I looked over at my daughter, perched happily on Edward's arm and gazing at the tree with total wonder. Edward turned to look at me and grinned before lowering his head and placing a soft, lingering kiss on my lips. The sting in the corners of my eyes had nothing to do with the cold.

It must've been some holiday magic, along with Edward's hypnotic green eyes, that somehow talked me into taking to the ice after the tree lighting. As soon as my feet hit the ice floor, I knew I'd made a horrible mistake. I turned to Edward with pleading eyes.

"Edward, you go out there with Maddie. I can't do this," I begged.

Edward wrapped an arm tightly around my waist, and held Maddie's hand in his other.

"Relax," he cooed, his emerald eyes sparkling like the thousands of holiday lights surrounding us. He leaned into my ear and kissed me gently before whispering, "I won't let you fall."

For the next few minutes, I clumsily zigged and zagged around and around the ice rink, narrowly avoiding more than one close call with the ice, as well as with any unfortunate person that came too close to me. As with most things, Edward was a natural on the ice; he glided and moved as gracefully as the most accomplished ice-skater.

I looked up at him and grimaced. "Show off."

He chuckled and held me tighter.

Pretty soon it was obvious that Maddie shared his talent for staying upright. Before long, it became clear that I was the liability in our little skating group of three, and Edward had to concentrate most of his efforts on keeping me afloat, while Maddie tugged on his other hand eagerly.

"Fastuh Edwood! Fastuh!" she complained, pulling on him with all her might to try to get him to speed up to an acceptable level.

"Hold on there Speedy," Edward teased her, holding her back. "If we go any faster mommy might fall."

"Mommy's not gonna fall! Right mommy? Right? Right?"

I rolled my eyes at Edward, but even that motion almost had me face-planting on the cold, wet floor. Edward twisted his arm around my waist to hold me up.

I groaned. "Sure, make me the bag guy here."

He laughed.

"Here, give her to me," Rose said, skating up behind us - another graceful Cullen - and carefully taking Maddie's hand from Edward's. "You're gonna need both hands to keep that one from breaking through the ice." She jerked her head towards me.

I gave her the dirtiest look I could muster without losing my balance.

Maddie took off with Rose and soon both of them were speeding around the ice happily. Out of my periphery, I could see the flashes of cameras. I hoped they were just snap-happy tourists.

"Enjoying yourself?" Edward asked, with a mischievous grin. He was skating backwards now, both his arms around my waist as he tried to keep me balanced.

"If by enjoying yourself you mean wishing I was home in my warm bed, then yes, I'm enjoying myself _immensely_," I responded sarcastically.

"Actually, that's not what I meant, but I think I like your interpretation a lot better, especially if I can join you in it."

"Hmph!" I snorted. "We'll have to see about _that_."

He raised an eyebrow and gazed at me. Then he let go, and I panicked, my legs flaying all over the place under me. But his hands were quickly around my waist again.

"Jesus Edward!"

"Relax," he chuckled. "I was just testing your balance."

"I have no balance! Just get me off this ice!"

He chuckled heartily. "What will I get in return?"

"Anything you want! Just get me off of here before I break my neck!"

"The warm bed? Yes?" he grinned impishly.

"Yes, yes! The warm bed! Anything!"

He raised both eyebrows. "_Anything_? Well in that case-"

He cut off midsentence, and when I looked up at him, his face had turned into a hard mask, as cold and smooth as the ice we were on.

I followed his eyes.

He was glaring intently at a woman skating around the ice rink by herself, twirling around in perfect figure eights. Strawberry-blonde curls bounced up and down as she jumped and landed perfectly on the ice. When she looked up and purposely met my gaze, my heart stopped.

Tanya.

She smiled coolly, and in my periphery, hundreds of flashes went off.

But then she was definitely skating towards us, and all the flashing cameras fell by the wayside. Edward's grip around my waist tightened, leaving me almost breathless.

She bounded towards us at full speed, and the surprise of it made my legs flail again, and Edward had to hold me up once more. She came to a sharp stop right in front of us, and then she looked from me to Edward and…_smiled_. She took off again, circling the rink.

"_Fuck!"_ Edward growled. And the holiday lights and flashing cameras all melted into one bright, confusing light.

"Edward, please, can we get off the ice?"

His eyes were black, his square jaw set tight. He nodded and started skating us slowly towards the exit.

Like a shark, Tanya circled us again, her husky laughter trailing like an echo as she whizzed by.

Edward's grip tightened again and a stream of profanities emanated from between his lips.

Then Rosalie was at my side.

"What the fuck is she doing here?" she hissed.

"Rose, where's Maddie?" I asked in a panicky voice.

"She's on the bench with Em, getting her skates off. Alice and Jasper are already waiting for us at the Café with Esme and Carlisle."

"Rose, get Maddie inside. Now," Edward commanded in a hard voice. "We'll meet you all over there."

Rosalie's bright blue eyes followed Tanya around the rink, with a look of pure rage that rivaled Edward's. She nodded angrily and skated away, glaring in Tanya's direction.

I gripped on to Edward's arms for dear life, as he guided us carefully off the ice.

We were only a few short feet away from the exit when Tanya circled us for the last time. She reached out and ran one arm over Edward's shoulder as she skated by.

The flashes in the distance went absolutely crazy.

But all that was relegated to my periphery senses. Because Edward flinched away from Tanya's touch, and his quick movement - along with my shock - threw me off of my already precarious balance. My legs completely gave out from under me, and my eyes opened wide in horror at the knowledge that I was about to fall, and fall _hard_.

Edward must've realized there was no way to stop the imminent fall. Somehow, he twisted his body around mine, so that when I finally did fall on my ass with a startled _thump_, it landed over him, and not the cold, wet ice.

For what felt like an eternity, we lay there, Edward spread out on the freezing ice and me over him. Cameras, both private and public alike, snapped away like there was no tomorrow. My senses finally returned to me, and I shook my head from side to side, twisting my body around to look at Edward, my hands extended out around him on the ice.

Before I could ask him if he was okay, he grabbed my head.

"Are you alright?" he asked, his forehead wrinkled with worry.

I couldn't help it. I mean, it was such a ridiculous situation. Edward and I on our asses on the ice. Because of his ex-girlfriend.

I could already see the headlines.

_Millionaire Playboy Eddie C. On Thin Ice with On-Again Off-Again Tanya_

_Ice Queen Isabella Swan Falls on Ass_

_Millionaire Heiress Tanya Denali Gets the Drop Kick on Isabella_

And suddenly, I didn't care.

The last few days had been draining, and I couldn't do it anymore.

I laughed - hard.

So hard the tears were rolling down my cheeks. I lifted my hands up and grabbed Edward's startled face, and knocked my frozen lips so forcefully against his it hurt. It took him a second, but then his mouth responded enthusiastically. Then we were kissing and laughing together, laid out on the cold Rockefeller Center ice, no longer giving two shits who was looking down at us, or what they thought.

Edward's arms went around my waist, and he pulled me down completely over him. And I laughed and laughed and kissed him some more. When I finally came up for air, lifting my face to the cool winter wind, the flashes of light were blinding.

And I couldn't have cared less.

OOOOOOOOOO

We were at Edward's, a couple of hours later. His place was a lot closer to Rockefeller Center, so we'd decided to spend the night there instead. Since Maddie had never slept over Edward's, she was so excited it took her longer than usual to fall asleep. Finally, Edward sat down at his piano and started playing a tune so soft, so soothing, that when I checked in on Maddie again, she was fast asleep.

After the restaurant, Jasper and Alice had come back with us for a little while. Now they were getting ready to leave.

"I swear, she's fucking lucky I wasn't there. I would've pushed her face into the fucking ice!" Alice said bitterly for about the twentieth time tonight. Each time, the threat took on a different form, but the basic idea was the same.

Jasper chuckled at his wife.

Edward smirked and pulled me in closer to his side.

I sighed. "Alice, I don't think it's worth talking about."

Edward had been tense for the rest of the evening, and I knew we'd have to discuss the scene eventually. At this point, we both pretty much knew the headlines would be hard to read tomorrow.

"Yes Alice," Edward agreed coolly. "It's not worth talking about."

Alice pursed her lips. "Yeah, I guess you're right.

Once the doors closed behind Alice and Jasper, Edward pulled my back into his chest and wound his arms around my waist. His head rested on the crook of my neck.

"You okay?" he murmured quietly. I could hear the real concern in his voice.

I nodded. "I'm fine Edward." I reached up behind me and snaked my hands through his hair.

"How's your head?" I'd been worried he'd banged it, but he'd reassured me he was okay.

He snorted. "My head's just fine." His hands trailed down slowly below my waist, caressing my hips and then grabbing my butt. "And anyway, I'd rather bang my head a thousand times than let you hurt this." He squeezed tightly. "You know how much I love your nice round-"

"Edward, what was she doing there?"

He sighed into my neck. "I don't know."

"Do you think she knew we'd be there?"

"I don't know Bella." The movement of his lips against my neck sent tingles down my spine, regardless of the subject matter. I tried to keep myself focused.

"I don't want her around Maddie Edward."

"Neither do I Bella."

We were both silent for a long while.

After the long evening, Edward suggested we take a nice soothing bath in his hot tub; an idea that appealed to me on more than one level at that point. He went in to the bathroom to get it ready, while I went into my overnight bag to get my bathroom essentials. Just then, something thrown haphazardly on the sofa caught my eye.

Maddie had been playing around with Eli when we'd gotten back, and at some point he'd put his doorman's cap on her head, and she'd brought it up with her.

I picked the cap up and called out to Edward.

"Edward, I'm just going to return Eli's cap to him. I'll be right up okay?"

"Bella, that can wait until tomorrow," he called back over the quiet roar of the water running.

"It'll just take a couple of minutes. I'll be right up," I called out, already heading towards the door.

As I stepped off the elevator down in the lobby, I was lost in thought about today. The bath running upstairs was to relax both Edward and I, but I knew once that was done, we'd have to talk about-

My thoughts were cut off by the steely, authoritative tone of Eli's voice a few feet ahead of me. I'd never heard that tone from him.

That was the first thing to surprise me, but that wasn't what had me stopping dead in my tracks, the cap all but forgotten in my hands.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Denali," he said, standing with his back to me and facing Tanya, a huge scowl on her perfect face. "But Mr. Cullen has made it perfectly clear that you are not to be allowed access to-"

"Don't you fucking stand there and tell me where I can and can't go! You're nothing but a filthy doorman and-"

She caught sight of me, and abruptly, her scowl turned into a huge, bitter smile.

"Oh, I see now!" she chuckled. She turned cold blue eyes back to Eli. "You know, you could've just told me he was fucking someone else up there. It's not like it hasn't happened before."

Eli's head whipped around, and his eyes flashed up to mine in horror before turning back around to Tanya. He mumbled something under his breath in Spanish that I didn't understand, but sounded like, "_hija de la gran puta_," before addressing Tanya again in a cold and slightly menacing voice.

"Ms. Denali," he said through gritted teeth, "I really think it would be best if you left now."

She looked down at him as if he were an amusing bug. Then she snorted and moved past him, walking over to me slowly.

"Ms. Denali-" Eli tried to protest.

"Shut the fuck up doorman," she called out, never taking her eyes off of me.

_"Maldita sea," _Eli grumbled under his breath.

Tanya came to a stop in front of me.

"Isabella, isn't it?"

I didn't answer.

"Yes, it is," she answered herself. "I apologize. Had I known you were here, I wouldn't have just shown up. But Edward and I have always had these impromptu little…visits…"

She watched me carefully for my reaction, and even though her words had cut me to the core, I tried not to flinch.

"A lot has changed Tanya, since you and Edward were together."

Her eyes widened, as if she'd been taken by surprise by my answer. She studied me closer. I could feel the color rising to my face, but suddenly I wasn't sure if it was embarrassment or anger at the nerve of this woman showing up here, when my baby was fast asleep upstairs, that was sending the blood pooling to the surface.

Eli stood quietly to the side, his dark eyes roaming anxiously from me to Tanya.

"Ms. Swan, should I call Mr. Cullen?"

"Yes!" Tanya hissed.

"No!" I responded quickly. "No. Thank you Eli. Ms. Denali should be leaving soon."

Eli didn't look too convinced. He mumbled something else under his breath.

Tanya arched a perfectly shaped eyebrow, the amusement dropping from her face. She snorted indignantly.

"Isabella, you aren't really stupid enough to believe you're anything more than a temporary distraction to Edward, are you?"

I didn't answer her.

She chuckled.

"Look dahling, I'm not trying to purposely be a bitch here. If anything, I'm about to give you the biggest eye opener since you left that little hick Washington town of yours. Do you have any idea how many women have come in and out that door?" She pointed towards the thick, glass door leading to the street, a big green wreath with a festive red bow hanging from it. Her eyes moved to Eli.

"Ask your doorman buddy here. Go ahead. I'm sure he's got loads of interesting stories to tell you."

Eli glared back at her. Tanya laughed.

"Tanya you and I have nothing-"

"He wanted to fuck you since that day back at his sister's house. Do you remember that day?"

I pressed my lips tightly together.

"I saw it in his eyes that day, that same look he always gets when he's zeroing in on a new conquest." She sighed dramatically, shaking her head. "Isabella, let me fill you in on something you may not know about Edward and I."

"I know everything Tanya. Edward told me everything."

Again, her eyes widened in surprise. But then the cool smile returned.

"Did he now? Did he tell you that this isn't the first time he and I have played this game?"

"What game?" I asked instinctively, and then cursed myself internally for taking her bait.

Her smile widened. "This game," she answered quickly, waving one hand between the both of us. She sighed impatiently.

"I guess he hasn't told you everything then," she snickered. "Well that's just a shame dahling! He gave you a part in our little game, the least he could've done was tell you the rules!" she laughed.

"Well, it's not my place to tell you the rules, if he hasn't. You go back to Edward, and you ask him what his M.O. is. Ask him about the game he and I play, and then maybe you'll realize-"

My hands shook at my sides as she went on and on. My breathing was shallow, and I could feel the blood boiling in my veins.

I closed my eyes and behind my lids I saw myself sitting at home alone every single time Paul disappeared, every time a new rumor hit my ears.

I saw me crying myself to sleep because I was too scared to do anything about it.

"Tanya, I don't know what game you and Edward played, and I don't really care. Whatever fucked up relationship you two had is over, and I don't want or need the gory details."

She reeled back as if I'd struck her.

"Edward and I are _not_ over-"

"You feel you've got some unfinished business with Edward," I hissed, "you take it up with him when _I'm_ not around, _and_ when my _daughter_ isn't around. I don't want or need this drama." I turned my back on her, moving back towards the elevators.

"Oh I'll take it up with Edward alright dahling," she laughed.

I wheeled around quickly and stalked up to her. She was a lot taller than me, but I raised my head and looked her right in her cold, blue eyes.

For a split second, I felt a sliver of satisfaction at the fear in them.

"You do whatever you feel you need to, but I'm telling you one more time" – she drew her top half back, as if she were afraid I'd hit her – "don't ever come anywhere near where my daughter is. Because that's where I draw the line."

Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw Eli grinning.

Then I turned around again and headed for the elevator, punching for the call button. Eli was suddenly by my side.

But Tanya wasn't giving up just yet.

In a smooth, refined voice she said, "Isabella dahling, have you ever heard the saying, 'A leopard doesn't change his spots?'" She giggled.

The elevator arrived and Eli quickly moved to turn the Penthouse key for me. His expression was murderous. I tried to smile at him.

Before the doors closed, I met Tanya's eyes once more.

"Yes, but there's a second part to that saying." I squared my shoulders.

_Big girl panties, big girl panties._

"A leopard doesn't change his spots, _but he always eats his prey,"_ I said through clenched teeth.

I had just enough time to see her narrow her eyes furiously before the elevator doors closed.

Inside by myself, I could hear the blood pounding between my ears, my shallow breathing. I could feel the sharp shaking of my body. Breathing in and out slowly, I placed my forehead and the palms of my hands against glassed wall of the elevator, trying to calm myself before making it back upstairs. But my heart was pounding violently as the adrenaline that had taken over downstairs worked its way through my system. My eyes stung with a vengeance, but I refused to let one single teardrop fall, because I knew it would just take one to lead to an avalanche I wouldn't be able to stop.

My head pounded, and when I realized I still had Eli's cap clutched tightly in my hand, I chuckled humorlessly to myself.

What if I hadn't gone downstairs? Would she have forced her way up? How close would she and her craziness have gotten to my baby?

What the hell was I going to tell Edward?

And what kind of god-damned war had I just started?

OOOOOOOOOO

**Headlines for following morning:**

_PAGE SIX_

_Holiday Magic!_

_All those in attendance for the Rockefeller Christmas Tree lighting yesterday got a bigger show than they bargained for when Millionaire Ex-Playboy Eddie Cullen and girlfriend Isabella Swan showed up for the ceremonies._

_The couple and her adorable little daughter, four-year old cutie Madison, as well as Eddie's family enjoyed the holiday festivities last night, and then even took some time to skate around the ice rink for a short while. _

_For the past week or so, rumors have been running rampant that Eddie's new flame might be a cold and calculating fish. But all those rumors were put to bed yesterday after Tanya Denali showed up rather unexpectedly and started skating circles around the couple, unnerving them to the point where both ended up plastered on the ice._

_Though honestly, as New Yorkers we might have found that spectacle humorous, it was the expressions on both Eddie and Isabella's faces that turned the tables in their favor. The heat from their concern for one another was enough to melt a hole through the ice-rink! And then as if that weren't enough, Isabella carelessly threw her arms around her boyfriend and proceeded to kiss him senseless, for once completely disregarding the audience! _

_Just look at the expression on her face when she finally came up for air! People, this is not a girl out to climb a proverbial ladder, this is a girl who wears her heart on her sleeve when she smiles!_

_Whatever Eddie's motivation in promoting Ms. Swan at his advertising group, CCW, one thing is clear: this is a couple very much in love._

"_They looked absolutely breathtaking out there, kissing and gazing at each other as if the rest of the world didn't matter" said one out-of-towner. "And she really is a beauty when she smiles!"_

_Another witness to the incident exclaimed, "That was really messed up what Tanya did! She needs to get a life now that Edward's found true love!"_

_Looks like both Eddie and America have found a new sweetheart! _

_**The New York Times – Media and Advertising Section:**_

_**EverSoft Inc. Owners Speak Out On CCW Group Issue:**_

_For days, the advertising world has been turned on its head with rumors that the CCW Group, one of the field's fastest growing agencies, has fallen victim to the flighty whims of one of its owners, renowned playboy Edward Cullen._

_Cullen, 28, a well-respected advertising genius in the field, has for years led what some may call a double life. Respected in advertising circles as a leader and innovator, along with his partners, brother Emmett Cullen, 30, and college friend Jasper Whitlock, 28, Edward has often been the poster boy for philandering and misbehavior in his personal life._

_In the past few days however, news of a new romantic relationship for Edward has affected both areas of his life. Unfortunately, his new girlfriend, Isabella Swan, 26, also happens to be the new head of one of the agency's biggest accounts, the multi-million dollar EverSoft account, prompting rumors that Edward Cullen has forgotten how to separate his love life from his professional life._

_Now, John and Mark Cartwright, owners of EverSoft Inc., one of the world's largest makers and distributors of personal hygiene products, have come to the defense of CCW, and Mr. Cullen and Ms. Swan as a result._

"_Ms. Swan is a lovely young woman," John Cartwright tells us. "She has turned the profitability of our EverSoft brand around since she came onto the account a few months ago. Why, she alone is responsible for our new ad campaign, which preliminary sales have shown to be a huge success!" he gushes further._

_John is referring to the widely hailed 'Baby's Bottom Campaign,' EverSoft's attempt to reach the younger demographic in the market with bolder and fresher ads. A new commercial for the campaign is set to premier in the next couple of weeks._

"_Edward Cullen, while perhaps not as friendly as his brother Emmett or co-owner Jasper, has never been anything less than professional in our dealings with him," Mark Cartwright adds. "We are both extremely pleased and overjoyed with CCW, and with the work they've done for us. Isabella is a definite asset to their company, and to our account."_

_CCW is one of the top ten advertising agencies in the country. The group continuously provides its clients and the public with bold, fresh new ideas. With the Cartwright brothers speaking out now, any doubt that Isabella Swan earned her quick promotion should disappear. And with the highly prestigious CLIO Advertising Awards just a couple of months away, who knows? CCW and Isabella may be poised for a combined win._

OOOOOOOOOO

* * *

**A/N: Translations:**

_Hija de la gran puta_ – Very naughty curse. Sort of means bitch, but the literal translation is daughter of the big bitch. Go figure.

_Maldita sea_ – Damn it.

**What's your favorite commercial?**

**Reviews, as always, are read with much love! **

**EPOV next.**


	29. Chapter 28 America's Sweetheart

**A/N: I want to thank everyone who reviewed last chapter. Lots of speculation on what's going to happen in the next few chapters, who's been leaking the info to the press, who made the spooky phone call…All questions will eventually be answered.**

**Like I said last chapter, a few more chappies left to this story. Don't forget to put me on Author and/or Story Alert if you're interested in reading the story that will follow this one. **

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Chapter 28 – America's Sweetheart**

**Chapter Song Rec:**

_**Everybody Loves You Now**_** – Billy Joel**

**EPOV**

**A FEW DAYS EARLIER:**

I turned the key in the lock, twisting the knob and pushing the door open. Total darkness and silence greeted me inside the apartment. It felt…wrong. The sound of little feet running back and forth, the delicious scent of a freshly cooked dinner wafting in the air, childish laughter and adult gazes and touches – all were glaringly absent. I moved through the apartment quietly, leaving all the lights off until I got to my bedroom. There, I flipped the light switch on, the glow of the recessed lights illuminating the empty room and the cold bed I'd be sleeping on tonight. I sighed and threw my duffle and garment bags on the bed, watching as it gave with the weight. Something about that looked off too.

My eyes moved to the alarm clock on the edge of the nightstand. I had about fifteen minutes before my visitor arrived. I'd cut it close by leaving Bella's place so late. But it had been almost impossible to tear myself out of her arms, to not say _fuck it,_ and just pick her up and take her to the bedroom and strip all our clothes off. I knew she wanted me to; I could feel it in the way she pressed herself against me, in the lust in her eyes, in the way her tongue moved against mine. But I knew if I did, there was no way in hell I would've left her apartment tonight. And I _had_ to do this. I sighed again and ran my hand through my hair.

Figuring I might as well do something useful with the few minutes I had before my visitor arrived, I unpacked all my dirty clothes and carried those that wouldn't be professionally laundered to the laundry room, sorting the whites and colors and dropping a load in. A small smile pulled on my lips as I pressed the START button on the machine, watching as it filled up slowly with water. Bella had asked me to bring more clothes with me next time I went back to her place. Well, she wouldn't have to ask me twice. As I stared at the agitator spinning left to right, right to left, I made a mental list of what clothing items I'd be taking with me. I'd have to tell her to do the same. In my mind, I was already moving half of my stuff over to one side of my walk-in closet, making room for her pretty work clothes, her jeans, her shoes. And the guest room…the guest room could easily be colored pink or purple; we could hang some pretty princess frames and pictures…or Bella could paint some pretty artwork and castles on the walls…

The phone gave the familiar ring, signaling that someone was in the lobby.

"Mr. Cullen," Eli greeted me. "There's a gentleman here to see you?"

"Thanks Eli. Send him up."

When I opened the door, I came face to face with a Mediterranean version of Emmett. The man was huge; all thick necked and wide shouldered – like a wrestler. He had an olive complexion and dark wavy hair. Dressed in a dark suit and sunglasses - even though we were indoors and it was night time - he looked like a rogue secret service agent.

"Mr. Cullen?"

"Yes."

"I'm Demetri Ichnilatis."

We shook hands.

"Please come in," I said, and moved aside for him to enter.

We walked through the apartment and into the living room; I turned on the lights as we went. Demetri's footsteps were surprisingly light and soundless, despite his size – a fact that probably came in handy in his line of business. I offered him a seat and took one opposite him.

Demetri reached into his back pocket and pulled out a small pad and a pencil that had been sharpened within an inch of its life, and we got straight down to business.

"Mr. Cullen, Mr. Jenks tells me you would like to procure my services?"

I cleared my throat. "Yes. There's someone I need you to find and track for me."

Demetri wrote something down on his pad. "Of course Mr. Cullen," he smiled. It was a confident smile; the smile of someone who'd been asked to do something ridiculously easy. He looked back up at me.

"I'm a P.I. Mr. Cullen. Finding and tracking people is what I do best."

I nodded. "Yes, I've been told you're the best. That's why you're here."

He snorted.

"Unfortunately, I don't have a picture for you, or an exact last known address. All I have is a name, and a town."

Demetri's smile widened; again he wrote down more on his pad. "That should be more than enough Mr. Cullen. I've found people with less information than that." He raised his brows. "Now once I find this individual, what would you like me to do?"

I drew in a deep breath and exhaled it out slowly. "Keep tabs on him. I need to know what he's been up to for the past few years; how he earns a living, what places he frequents on a regular basis, how he spends his free time, anything and everything with the slightest bit of…interest."

He smiled at me knowingly, as if his experience in this field somehow gave him the power to know exactly what I was thinking.

I set my lips in a tight line. "Mr. Ichnilatis-"

"Call me Demetri."

"Demetri. It's extremely important that you're very careful with how you gather your…information. At some point, it may need to be-"

Here Demetri interrupted me. "Mr. Cullen, I've worked with Mr. Jenks for many years now. I am fully aware of the importance of some of the information I gather, and that I need to do my job both carefully and…discreetly." He met my eyes carefully. "Trust me Mr. Cullen, I know what I'm doing."

I studied him for a few moments. "Very well." I reached into my shirt pocket and took out a picture, passing it hesitantly to Demetri across the coffee table. "I especially need to know anything he's done or said in relation to her."

Demetri took the picture and gave it a cursory glance before stuffing it in his back pocket. It made me nervous, but I reminded myself he could've gotten a picture of her from any dozens of papers this week anyway. Besides, Jenks had completely assured me that Demetri was a professional; that he trusted him implicitly; that he was the best in the business.

"That shouldn't be a problem, Mr. Cullen," Demetri replied in a cool, competent tone. He lowered his head and wrote down a few more notes for himself on his handy little pad.

"There's one more thing."

He looked up at me once more, raising an eyebrow. "Yes?"

I squared my jaw. Uncle Aro was right; and even Carlisle had reluctantly agreed. With Bella in the public eye now, I had to make sure that asshole didn't try anything stupid. And if he did, we needed to be ready.

"If he leaves town, I need to know right away, and I need to know where he's headed."

"Certainly."

I nodded.

"Now, if you'll please tell me the name of the individual I'll be looking for?"

I met his dark eyes.

"The name of the individual is Paul Forrester."

OOOOOOOOOO

**PRESENT:**

For the love of God, how long did it take to ride the elevator down to the lobby and return a cap?

I leaned impatiently against the long, marble double sink, my arms crossed against my bare chest. The water bubbled noisily inside the deep white Jacuzzi tub, rising to the surface and breaking like a pool of whitewater. I stared at it anxiously; waiting for Bella. Exhaling loudly, I ran one hand through my hair. The frothy water looked so damn tempting, hot steam rising and twisting in the air, and I was starting to get cold here in just my boxer briefs.

Shit, where _was_ she?

I snorted, picturing her sitting on the stool opposite Eli, completely having forgotten the fact that she and I had a date with a Jacuzzi tub right now. I sighed and leaned down, sticking a tentative hand in the water. Definitely not as warm as it was five minutes ago. Exhaling again, I turned off the whirlpool jets. The large bathroom was abruptly silent.

Then the front door opened and closed.

I snorted and shook my head, throwing my t-shirt back on and walking out of the bathroom and towards the living room. When I reached it, she was there with her back to me, facing the sliding doors that led out onto the terrace, her forehead resting heavily against the dark glass. Her delicate shoulders rose and fell with her breaths. My eyes trailed down to her hands, which were also pressed against the glass. I smirked when I saw Eli's cap still clutched tightly in one of her hands.

Walking up behind her, I snaked my arms around her small waist and lowered my head to her shoulder. She felt tense.

"If Eli was a few years younger, we'd have to put a stop to these long visits with him," I teased, nibbling her ear.

Bella didn't answer. Her body felt stiff and tight; usually she melted right into me when I held her this way. She took in deep, measured breaths, exhaling heavily. She was probably still upset about fucking Tanya showing up at Rockefeller tonight. I fought back a wave of fury at the memory, because now was all about tending to my Bella; taking care of her. That's why I'd suggested the soothing bath.

Well, that and because the idea of Bella riding me in the Jacuzzi was as hot as hell.

"I know you're upset love. I am too. But I promise you Bella," I murmured, kissing her neck lightly, "She's not going to come anywhere near us or Maddie again."

Bella snorted, shaking her head back and forth slowly. "Edward-"

"Shh," I trailed my hands under her sweater, down her back, her hot skin burning my palms. With one hand I undid the clasp to her bra, and then ran my hands slowly to the front of her chest, taking her freed breasts into my hands and massaging them gently. God, they were so un-fucking-believably soft.

"Let's not think about her now Bella," I asked in a low voice, moving my lips up and down her neck. "I don't know if she knew we'd be there, but she put on her show and got her attention. I'm sure she's satisfied now." I grazed her perky peaks with my thumbs. "Let's not let her ruin the rest of our night..."

"Edward…"

I moved one hand slowly down her stomach; it contracted tightly at my touch. Moving lower, I popped the button on her jeans and pulled the zipper down. My need for her growing, I ground myself firmly into her from behind and snuck my hand under her panties. Her breath hitched.

"Edward please…"

I smiled into her neck. And just as my fingers grazed her, a cold hand shot out and landed on top of mine.

"Edward, please stop."

I stopped right away. Confused, I lifted my hands up to her shoulders and turned her around to me.

When I caught sight of her face, my heart almost stopped.

"Bella what's wrong?"

She didn't answer right away. Her dark eyes glistened, hurt and angry. She hadn't looked this upset since…since we'd had that big fight right before Thanksgiving.

"What happened Bella?" I repeated anxiously. I could tell she was fighting to keep herself composed. She lowered her head.

"Did the photographers get into the building?" I asked through clenched teeth, but even as I said the words they didn't make sense to me; because Eli would've never allowed them in. "Were there photographers-"

"It was Tanya," Bella blurted, without looking at me.

I frowned. This was still about Tanya at the rink?

"Tanya? Bella love, I promise you Tanya won't come anywhere near you or Maddie-"

Her eyes shot up to me. "She was _downstairs_ Edward. _Now_. Tanya was in the lobby when I got there. She was arguing with Eli to let her up."

For a few long seconds, I stared at her, dumbfounded. But really, I shouldn't have been shocked. _Fuck_, I should've known Tanya would try something like this.

And the whole time, Bella's eyes pierced into mine, searching.

The pointless shock finally wore off, and I took Bella's face between my hands.

"Are you okay?"

She exhaled sharply, moving her eyes away from me. "I'm fine, I'm fine." She grabbed my wrists in her hands and pulled, as if she wanted me to let go. I held on.

"Did she say anything to you? Did she do anything to upset-"

Her eyes moved back to mine and she looked at me as if to say, _'seriously_?'

It _was_ a stupid question.

"What _did_ she say to you?" I asked instead.

Bella pursed her lips tightly, shaking her head back and forth. Her nostrils flared and she looked up at the ceiling.

"It doesn't matter," she finally answered in a trembling voice. Her eyes moved back to mine. "She's full of shit, right?"

But the look on her face made it obvious that whatever Tanya had said had gotten to her.

"Yes, she is full of shit. But obviously she upset you. So please tell me-"

"Look, I'm tired Edward. It was a long night. I just.."- she looked away from me – "I just want to get to sleep." And then she did pull my hands off of her face. I kept our fingers intertwined between us.

"I'm just going to take a bath," she mumbled with a weak smile, and then turned to walk away. I stood there for two seconds, my arm stretching out with her as she walked away; the scene, her voice, the look in her eyes - all strangely reminiscent of another scene before. Just before the tips of our fingers disconnected, I grabbed at her hand again and pulled her firmly towards me.

"Edward-,"

"No! You are _not _walking away," I hissed, pulling her tightly against me.

"Edward please." Her voice cracked - right before she threw her arms around me and started sobbing quietly into my neck.

I wound my arms around her waist, holding her so close that for a moment I was scared I'd hurt her. But I wasn't letting her push me away again.

Bella hung on to me with desperation, her arms wrapped solidly around my neck and the rest of her body pressed tightly against mine, like she wanted to crawl inside me.

"Oh love, please don't push me away again Bella. Please baby," I begged.

She cried harder - her chest heaving with her sobs - and held on to me impossibly tighter. And then she started mumbling something into my neck I honestly couldn't understand. But I couldn't bear the thought of pulling her away to hear her clearly.

When she'd exhausted herself, she loosened her grip and looked up at me. Her eyes were red, her creamy skin was blotchy. I reached up one hand silently and wiped away her tears.

"I didn't want you to see me cry," she murmured, in a voice as if she were trying to explain herself.

"What?" I asked gently.

"I wasn't walking away from you Edward. I just…didn't want you to see me cry."

A huge wave of relief washed over me.

I sighed. "Don't hide your feelings from me Bella. I've told you that. I want to know when you're upset, just like I want to know when you're happy. I want to be here for you in either situation."

"I'm sorry," she hiccupped. "I just…" – she snorted and narrowed her eyes – "she just really pissed me off."

I chuckled humorlessly. "Do you want to tell me what happened?"

For a long time, she didn't answer. Then finally she drew in a deep breath, and her eyes met mine.

"No. "

I pursed my lips.

She went on quickly. "I don't want to give any value to anything she said Edward." Her eyes bore into mine. "Whatever happened before shouldn't matter."

"No. It shouldn't" I agreed. I met her gaze carefully. "But does it?"

"No," she answered firmly again.

I studied her carefully. She looked a lot calmer than she had when she'd first walked in, but still. I'd have to watch her to make sure those old walls of hers wouldn't be making another appearance.

In the meantime,

"I'm calling my lawyer tomorrow and having him put a restraining order out on her. If she comes _anywhere_ within one hundred feet of you or Maddie again, I'm having her ass locked up."

Bella's eyes widened. "No Edward!"

"What do you mean, 'no'?" I asked incredulously.

"Edward, the last thing we need right now is more publicity!"

"But Bella-"

This time, she wrapped her warm hands around my face. "Listen to me Edward. I'm fine. Really. I got it out of my system and now I'm fine."

"And I'm relieved you feel better," I said evenly. "But I don't want her anywhere near you or Maddie."

She snorted. "Trust me Edward. I made it clear to her that neither you nor I will stand for her coming anywhere near Maddie. I don't think Tanya's stupid enough-"

"Bella, she's pretty stupid."

How many fucking times had I told her to stay away from me, and she still kept coming? If that wasn't stupidity, I wasn't sure what was.

But Bella just shook her head. "Please Edward. No restraining order. No more publicity. If…if she comes around again…then we'll discuss it. But _please_," she pleaded.

And once she looked at me that way, and got that tone in her voice, there was nothing I could deny her.

I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Alright," I agreed reluctantly. "But if there's one more incident Bella, I'm putting a restraining order on her, publicity or not," I said in a steely voice.

She nodded quietly.

Obviously, fucking Tanya and her unexpected visit put a damper on my hot tub plans with Bella.

OOOOOOOOOO

The next day at work, I sat at my desk drinking a cup of coffee and reviewing a proposal. Emmett's familiar knock sounded loudly against my door, and I glanced up just long enough to see him and Jasper stalk in quickly, matching amused smiles on their faces.

"What's up?" I asked, bringing my attention back down to the proposal. Two different newspapers suddenly hit my desk.

Emmett tapped insistently on one with his index finger. "Open that up to Page Six bro," he ordered.

I glanced up at him once more; his eyes were laughing.

"Whatever that shit says Em, I'm not interested."

Jasper tapped on the other newspaper with the same insistence Emmett had used for his.

"Then open this one up to the Business section."

I took a deep breath and put my coffee down, pinching the bridge of my nose before looking up firmly at both men.

"Look, Bella and I purposely avoided any newspapers or TV talk shows this morning, because we can just imagine what they're going to be saying today after fucking Tanya's spectacle last night, so if you don't mind-"

Emmett rolled his eyes. "Just open the damn paper Edward," he groaned.

I breathed out through my nose and pursed my lips, but after glaring up at their strangely expectant faces, I reached angrily for the New York Times Business section first.

My eyes grew wide in surprise as I read the article.

"Those crazy bastards," I mumbled once I was done, referring to the Cartwrights.

"Now read this one," Jasper chuckled, pushing the other paper my way.

I picked it up and turned to Page Six. The first thing I saw was a large picture of Bella, smiling radiantly with her face lifted towards the sky. Her face absolutely glowed with happiness, and the way her natural beauty shone through the picture was extraordinary. Quickly, I scanned the article, a small smile pulling on my lips the deeper I got into it.

"The rest of today's papers are carrying similar articles and pictures," Jasper chuckled. "And the talk shows," he laughed, "You've got to see the talk shows."

I furrowed my brows, but curiosity got the best of me. With a cautious grin, I opened the side drawer on my desk and pulled out the TV remote. Pointing it at the flat screen on the wall, I pressed the power button. The morning's talk shows were apparently still on.

"…_this side of the pond's version of Prince William and Kate Middleton." _

The gossipy talk show host smiled widely at the camera from her seat on the long white leather sofa.

"_New York's once renowned bad boy, Edward Cullen,"_ - an older picture of me, grinning widely, and apparently drunk as a skunk, flashed on the TV – _"is taking on a different role these days - that of loving boyfriend to beautiful girlfriend Isabella Swan,"_ – flash to a picture of Bella and I walking through the airport with Maddie hidden in my arms – _"and protective father-figure to her daughter, adorable little Maddie."_ This time the camera zeroed in on a close up of Maddie holding on to my hand last night at Rockefeller Center.

"_The couple has been the target of a few rumors and insinuations since their relationship recently became public, mainly revolving around the fact that Isabella Swan is a new Graphic Artist at Edward's Advertising Agency, CCW, as well as Isabella's apparent discomfort at being in the public eye."_

"_They've been pretty nasty haven't they?"_ the woman's male co-host volunteered.

The woman chuckled, sparing him a side-long glance. Her attention quickly returned to the TV camera.

"_But yesterday, we all got to witness the new couple and her daughter out enjoying the holidays in New York, and despite the unbelievable beauty of Rockefeller Plaza last night, Edward and Bella's-"_

"_Bella's?"_ the co-host asked.

"_That's what Edward calls her,"_ the woman answered him quickly with another impatient side-long glance. _"Edward and Bella's eyes rarely strayed from each other,"_ she continued_. "Or little Maddie."_ The camera panned to a video of Bella, Maddie and I skating around the rink last night.

The woman's voice continued over the video. _"I've gotta say, they were the picture of the perfect couple. Almost like a little family._"

"_That is, until Edward's ex, Denali heiress Tanya Denali, showed up!"_ The male host chuckled. On the video, Tanya skated around Bella and me, and ran her hand over my shoulder, and when I flinched away from her touch, Bella lost her balance, and we both ended up on the ice floor.

"_Ooh!"_ Both hosts exclaimed.

"_Ouch!"_ The woman added.

The camera focused in closer on Bella and I, capturing the horror on my face when I'd been afraid Bella had hurt herself, as well as Bella's reciprocating concern. And then she was laughing and kissing me, and lifting her head up to catch her breath. Even on the video, you could clearly see the hundreds of camera flashes at Bella's uplifted face.

"_Aww_," both hosts cried in unison again.

"_Lucky guy,"_ the male host chimed.

The camera zeroed in on the hosts again. _"Well, anyway,"_ the female host smiled, straightening out her notes over her lap, "_Bella showed everyone who the bigger woman was in that situation, as well as how darn pretty she really is. Look at that smile! That face is gracing the pages of almost every newspaper this morning, and I'll bet it'll be on the pages of more than one magazine within the week. We're talking about America's newest sweetheart here!"_

I snorted and shook my head. That's what really mattered here; what they all cared about. They'd gotten a glimpse of Bella in all her beauty and glory, and now they were hungry for more. Suddenly she was worth their admiration. Damn hypocritical sharks.

But they were right. For the next few days, the picture of Bella at the skating rink was everywhere. The media absolutely loved her. And the more serious papers focused on how much value she'd added to CCW since she'd started with us. They interviewed a few of our willing clients, who all had nothing but glowing praise to give for her, of course. Those two crappy hosts were also correct about the magazines. Bella's Rockefeller Center pic appeared on the cover of a couple of magazines within the next few days, and one even carried a small picture of a seething Tanya next to Bella's, focusing on the 'growing animosity' between the two.

Bella hated the attention, of course, but she dealt with it. She was slowly learning how to play the media, and although she never courted their attention, she'd look up and give them a quick smile whenever they'd catch her.

And the paparazzi went wild.

The unavoidable day came when the media found out where Bella lived. One night Bella, Maddie and I walked into Bella's apartment with no fan or frenzy, and walked out the next morning to a flashing fury of photographers. I squared my jaw but kept my mouth shut this time, and pulled Maddie closer to me, guiding her quickly toward the car and buckling her into her car seat.

"Why those people got those big camawas Edwood?" she asked curiously, jerking her little head back when a flash exploded in her eyes. I closed my eyes momentarily to calm myself.

_Fuckers._

"Just ignore them princess. They'll go away soon."

She didn't say anything. Instead, her little head whipped back and forth from side to side as she gazed at them in amazement.

With both Bella and Maddie safely in the car, I straightened myself up and turned around, forcing myself to face the photographers and fighting down the stream of curses that was threatening to erupt. With every ounce of self-control I could muster, I grinned at them. Their surprised faces froze momentarily. I guessed after the last time I addressed them they'd been expecting something different.

"Do me a favor guys, just keep the cameras out of her face please? She's only four and doesn't understand this."

The next morning, the headlines were all about what a protective papa bear I apparently was.

_Fuckers_.

And then the following week, the nominees for next year's CLIO Advertising Awards were announced.

Suddenly, no one in the industry was surprised when CCW as an agency received a nomination for the entire EverSoft Baby's Bottom Campaign, when Rosalie and I received a nomination for Most Innovative Commercial, and of course, when Bella received a nomination for Most Innovative Print Design.

The media went crazy the day after the announcements. America's newest sweetheart had it all; beauty, brains, talent, an adorable little girl, and a handsome and devoted boyfriend (their words, not mine).

I fully agreed with four and a half out of five of those points (actually, in all honesty, the other half point was pretty much true too).

OOOOOOOOOO

I was laying on Bella's bed a couple of mornings after the CLIO announcements, channel surfing and listening to the sounds of her getting ready for work in the bathroom across the hall. The running faucet water and Bella's quiet humming drowned out most of the sound from the TV, which was fine with me. Even though Bella was admittedly tone deaf, I still preferred to hear her voice over anyone on the TV. I smirked to myself, imagining the smack in the arm I'd get if I ever told her she was tone deaf. The thought made me chuckle aloud as I scratched my bare stomach lazily.

The scene on the TV made me suddenly sit up.

One of the morning shows was flashing pictures and video of Bella and me again, but that wasn't what had caught my attention. Three women, all about Bella's height and build, stood off to the side of the studio, wearing outfits that, strangely enough, reminded me of outfits Bella would wear, while two other women studied them carefully from across the studio. I turned the volume up on the TV.

"…_our first model is wearing what we like to call Bella's Professional look: a pencil skirt and a plain, fitted dress shirt, tucked in of course. This outfit shows off Bella's slim and delicate curves very well, and can easily be picked up at most major retailers in the nation."_

"_And that's what we love about Bella's style, isn't it?_" said the other woman, with a serious expression. _"It's so simple yet so flattering. I mean, anyone can identify with her. She proves you don't have to be a rich heiress with a boob job or a nose job to have it all, or to look like a million bucks."_

"_So true,"_ the other woman agreed emphatically. _"Let's move on. The next outfit is what we like to call Bella's weekend look: a pair of skinny jeans tucked into tall brown boots and a…"_ the camera panned to the next model, who walked forward and did a turn, modeling the 'look.'

I burst out laughing.

"Bella love," I called out, "come here!"

"Hold on Edward, I'm brushing my teeth!" came her garbled reply.

"…_.and where would one go to get those boots?" _

"_Well, that's the best part! You can get them at…"_

"Bella get your beautiful butt here now!"

Bella ran into the bedroom in her white terry robe, stubbing her toe on the side of the door and bouncing up and down in front of the bed.

"Ow, Ow, Ow!"

"Sorry babe!" I chuckled guiltily, raising myself on my knees and grabbing Bella's hands to pull her back onto the bed. I sat her sideways on my lap and bent her knee up so I could take her foot into my hand and massage her little toe.

"Watch the TV," I instructed, jerking my head in its direction. She turned her head towards the TV.

"…_final look is based on what we've seen of Bella's sense of style. She obviously prefers simple, understated pieces, to loud, attention-calling prints, or to the short, skin-tight outfits we've seen __**another**__ of Edward's ex-girlfriends, who shall remain nameless,"_ the woman snickered, _"sport around town."_ I couldn't help a short chuckle because fuck, they were right.

The last model moved forward wearing a dark blue evening gown with wide straps, fitted through the waist, with a long skirt that flowed prettily to the floor.

"_This is the kind of dress we could picture Bella wearing to February's CLIO Awards. Simple, understated, yet extremely elegant. And paired with the gorgeous sapphire earrings she wears, along with the matching necklace I'm sure she's got tucked away somewhere, she'd look absolutely stunning."_

And the shit of it was, they were fucking right. I was already picturing Bella in that dress. And the model currently in it did it absolutely no justice.

"I'm going to have to find out where they got that dress," I murmured, more to myself than anything. My eyes remained on the TV while I massaged Bella's foot and toe gently. "Actually, maybe I should call Alice; she'd know-"

When I looked over at Bella, she was staring at me incredulously.

"This is absolutely…ridiculous." She sighed and made to get up. I put my arms around her waist and lay down on the bed, bringing her down with me.

"What's wrong love?" I chuckled.

She rolled her eyes and sat up on top of me, making a wide sweeping motion with her hands. The movement caused her loosely tied robe to loosen in the front, giving me a bird's eye view of the center of her creamy chest, and half of her breasts.

"This whole thing!" she groaned. "All this attention and…hype!"

I pulled her back down, reveling in the feel of her warm body pressed against mine, with nothing between us except her loose terry robe.

"At least it's better than it was a couple of weeks ago. And it won't last long Bella," I lifted my head up enough to take her top pouted bottom lip in between mine. I snorted and looked into her eyes. "You'll see. I give it another month or so, and then they'll move on to something else. It's the way these things always work. "

She shrugged and sighed; her expression hopeful.

"Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner tonight, just the two of us? I'm sure Alice would be more than happy to watch Maddie for a few hours. It might be a good distraction for you right now. We haven't had a dinner out alone yet, and besides I'd like to celebrate your CLIO nomination."

"_Our_ CLIO nominations," she corrected sharply.

I chuckled. "You know yours is the only one the media and the industry will be paying any attention to."

She rolled her eyes, making me chuckle.

But my mind had turned to more pressing matters. Like the fact that Bella's warmth was right…on…my…

And then she sat up, putting all her weight right where I wanted it the most. The way she looked at me, I was sure she knew what she was doing.

"Well…maybe in the meantime, we can think of another way to distract me." She smiled wickedly.

I lifted my hips into her. "Like what?"

She started moving on top of me. "Oh…I don't know…" she said breathlessly. "I think if we both…_aaahh_…focus…_mmmm_…we can probably think…"

But she couldn't even think enough to finish that sentence.

I gazed at her over me, mesmerized by the way her long hair cascaded loosely around her shoulders, the way her dark eyes sparkled, hooded and full of desire, the way she licked her lips as she rocked slowly back and forth on top of me. My chest felt hot and sweaty where her palms lay. God she was perfect.

"Edward…I've…_ohhh_…I've got to…_unhh_… go get Maddie up now or… we're going to be late to the office…"

"Shhh. Relax love," I whispered reassuringly, grabbing her hips and moving her over me back and forth. "I know the boss. Trust me, he won't mind you being a little late because of this." I jerked her hips down on me hard. She moaned beautifully. Then she chuckled.

"I know the boss too. And you're right. I don't think he'd mind at all..."

I reached up and started undoing the belt to her robe. She lifted her hands off my chest and started taking it off.

"No," I murmured. "Don't take it off. Just leave it open." She smiled curiously. "This robe's featured itself in more than one of my dreams of you." I thought back to the first time I'd seen her in it, right before Thanksgiving.

"Really?" she smirked. But she left it on. "So the boss likes the robe."

"The boss _loves_ the robe."

"Well, whatever the boss wants, the boss gets."

And that was as much 'boss' talk as I could take. I lifted her hips off of me, just enough to tug my boxer briefs down my hips, and then grabbed her and lowered her over me, groaning loudly the second I felt her searing heat.

She whimpered weakly, dropping her head, and stilled herself for a moment. And then I moved my hands to her hips again, guiding her. But we found a mutual rhythm easily. It was always like that when Bella and I made love; instinctual, god-damned perfect.

The heat…the heat inside her was amazing, like a warm tunnel that surrounded me; engulfed me, took me in tightly and made it hard for me to breath in the most intense way. She rocked over me, her eyes opening and closing languidly and the most beautiful moans and whimpers coming from her mouth. I reached up and brought that mouth down, licking her lips and absorbing her moans before pummeling her with my tongue.

"Oh God…Edward…Edward…"

"Yes baby. I love you Bella…I…love…you." I punctuated each word with a deep thrust.

"I love you too," she whimpered. She sat straight up again, her robe completely open in front of her. The sight of her moving over me, lifting her arms up so she could hold her hair off her neck, her back arched and her pale skin slick and slippery with perspiration, was almost too much to bear. I had to close my eyes for a few seconds, because if I kept looking at her, I wouldn't last much longer…

She started rocking faster.

"Edward…please Edward…_please_"

I lifted my hips, thrusting into her with everything I had.

"Oh God yes…yes…_yesss_…"

And then the scorching tunnel became impossibly hotter and…so _fucking_ moist…

I exploded with a loud groan and cried out her name, holding her hips tightly over me as we both tried desperately to quell the unquenchable fire that was now completely consuming us.

Afterwards, she threw herself heavily over me, her warm body like a soft, silky blanket, her strawberry scented hair covering every inch of my face. I inhaled deeply.

"Was that enough of a distraction?" I asked.

She chuckled. Her voice sounded thick and husky. "That was enough to distract me until the end of the month."

I gathered her hair carefully into one of my hands, and moved it off of my face. She lifted her head up and gazed into my eyes. The look of total bliss on her face was one of the most beautiful and satisfying things I could ever see.

"Well, that just won't do," I said, "because I can pretty much guarantee I'll be trying to distract you again tonight."

She kissed me softly on the lips. "That sounds just fine to me. Distract away."

OOOOOOOOOO

"Mommy, can I weauh my pwetty shugah plum costume to Sue's house tomowow to show Juliana?" Maddie asked from the back seat of the car as we drove her to her babysitter's later that morning.

Bella smiled at her apologetically through the rear-view mirror.

"Maddie honey, we have to make sure we keep the costume nice and clean for your show next week. Aunt Ally'll have a fit if it has the slightest stain on it."

I watched Maddie pout unhappily in her seat, and chuckled to myself at the cute way her little lips puckered.

"After the show princess, you can wear it as much as you want," I assured her.

Her face brightened. "Willy?"

I knew her enough by now to know she wasn't calling out some random kid's name.

"Yes, really," I answered her.

She giggled and kicked the bottom of her car seat happily with her swinging legs.

"Can I weauh it foh Cwismas?"

"I thought you wanted Santa to bring you some pretty princess costumes for Christmas?" Bella asked her.

"I do, I do!" she insisted, jumping up and down in her seat. "But I want to weauh the shugah plum costume too! I could change lots and lots! Fuhst pwincess, then Shugah plum, then other pwincess, then Shugah plum again, then other pwincess, then shugah plum again, then other pwincess, then-"

"Let me guess," I teased her, "Sugar plum again?"

"Yes. How'd you guess Edwood?" she asked in amazement.

I chuckled. "That reminds me," I said, stealing a quick glance at Bella. "You still haven't told me what you want for-"

"Don't you dare ask me what I want for Christmas again, Edward Cullen!" Bella snapped. "I still can't think of how much you've spent on me, not even taking into account the first-class tickets to Washington and the jewelry, without cringing." She cringed, just to illustrate her point.

I smirked and rolled my eyes. "Bella, we've talked about this," I reminded gently. "Those were not Christmas gifts. And Christmas is a big thing in my family. We all get together and sit around Esme's huge Christmas tree to exchange gifts. You can't possibly deny me the pleasure of watching you open a gift from me Christmas day," I insisted, grinning unashamedly.

"Well then, re-wrap the necklace and call it a day," she said dryly. "I promise to act thoroughly surprised."

I sighed. "That's not an option."

"Then I don't know what to tell you," she said with an air of finality.

But I wasn't giving up.

"Tell me what you want for Christmas," I smiled crookedly, knowing she had a weakness for it.

She exhaled loudly, and then suddenly leaned towards the console and turned the volume up on the radio. The sound of Christmas bells rang loudly as one of those yearly Christmas songs started. Bella put up her index finger, as if waiting for her part, and then belted out,

"I don't want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need.  
I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree.  
I just want you for my own more than you could ever know."

"Make my wish come truuue, ooh hoo," she leaned up against me, looking up at me through her long eyelashes with pleading eyes. I glanced at her and rolled my eyes.

All I want for Christmas is youuuu!" she finished in that wonderful off-key voice of hers.

Then she burst out laughing. I glanced at her again and shook my head, picking up her hand.

"You're impossible sometimes."

She shrugged and looked out her window. "That's all I want Edward. Nothing more, nothing less."

I sighed and didn't answer her. I'd have to figure something out on my own.

When we arrived at Sue's, I parked the car across the street from her house and got up to unbuckle Maddie. Bella got out too. Carefully, I lifted Maddie's coat hood over her head, both to keep her warm against the cold winter morning, and to shield her as much as possible from any photographers that might be lurking nearby. Just as I undid her buckle, my cell phone rang. I picked Maddie up out of the car and balanced her on one arm while pulling out my phone from my pocket to check it.

**Demetri Ichnilatis** the front screen read. I set my lips in a tight line and looked up at Bella.

"Bella love, I've got to take this call."

"Oh, okay," she said quickly, moving towards me. I gave Maddie a quick kiss on the top of her head before handing her over to her mother.

"See you later princess. Love you."

"Love you too Edwood! See you latuh!"

I watched them cross the street safely towards Sue's house before pressing the Answer button on my cell.

"Demetri, what's going on?" I hadn't heard from him since the night I'd hired him. But he'd said he'd call as soon as he had something to tell me. My heart beat anxiously in my chest.

"Mr. Cullen, it's been a busy week over here."

"Tell me."

"Well, Mr. Forrester is a colorful character, to say the least."

I grimaced. "Anything I should know about right now?" My eyes trailed towards where Bella and Maddie had entered Sue's house. The first priority was keeping them safe. I'd worry about Paul's 'colorful character' later.

Demetri was silent for two seconds. "Mr. Cullen, I don't know exactly what you need the information I'm gathering for, but since I was referred to you by Mr. Jenks, I have a pretty good idea of what you need me to find out. And I can tell you, I've found out a hell of a lot. But…"

"But what?" I asked sharply, my heart rate increasing.

"But although I've gathered plenty of potentially valuable information on Mr. Forrester, I haven't been able to find him…yet."

"What do you mean you haven't found him?" I hissed.

"He is not here Mr. Cullen. He hasn't been in town for at least a couple of weeks. I've looked for him all over, including the neighboring towns. No one has seen him. It's as if he's disappeared off the face of the Earth."

My nostrils flared, and my breath came in hard pants. "Damn it Demetri, you've got to figure out where he is!"

"Don't worry Mr. Cullen. I've yet to have a subject I've failed to find sooner or later. I'm a tracker; it's what I do."

Bella emerged from Sue's house, walking swiftly back towards the car.

I turned around quickly. "You need to find him right away!" I said through clenched teeth.

"I plan to Mr. Cullen. I've got a few leads to follow."

When I turned back around, Bella was just a few feet away.

"Keep me informed," I said stiffly, before hitting the END button.

I walked quickly over to the passenger side and opened the door for her. She stared at me and tilted her head.

"Everything okay?"

I fought down the anxious knot in my chest and met her gaze. "Yeah, just…one of the clients being a pain in the ass."

She stared at me. "Alright," she said slowly.

Later that morning, back at the office, I placed a call to Jenks.

"What's going on Mr. Cullen? Have you heard from Demetri?"

"I spoke to him earlier. He says he's been able to gather some potentially useful information."

"Good. That's good," Jenks said thoughtfully. "Demetri is absolutely tops at what he does. As I told you, I've used him for many jobs. Unfortunately, he was in the middle of another job when I needed him for Isabella's case a couple of months back, and since I needed any bit of information I could get right away, we went with someone else from his agency. Also a good guy, but Demetri, yeah, he's the best. He's known as 'The Tracker' in his field."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, well, 'the tracker' can't find Paul Forrester."

Jenks was silent. "Does he have any leads?"

"He says he has a few."

"Well, give him some time. I'm sure he'll turn him up. In the meantime, we've had Ms. Swan's divorce records sealed and-"

"Jenks, what's the worst Paul Forrester can do here?"

I heard Jenks draw in a deep breath on the other line.

"The thing is Cullen, he's refused to sign the termination papers more than once now. He's no longer in touch with his lawyer, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's given up.

I pinched the bridge of my nose and exhaled heavily into the phone.

"Cullen, I've been in this business for a damn long time, and I've seen almost everything at this point. I could see Forrester's previous attempt to claim some sort of custody over the child as having been brought on by something as simple as boredom."

"Fucking ruin lives over boredom?"

"I've seen it happen before. He's bored with his life, realizes he never had it as good as he did when he was married to Ms. Swan," – my heart clenched painfully – "and made a weak, half-assed attempt at reclaiming that life. Now once he saw it wasn't going to be as simple as that, he lost interest. When we asked him to sign the termination papers and he refused, it may have been a last ditch attempt at keeping some sort of hold over Ms. Swan. The thing is, under normal circumstances, eventually he may have given up on the idea of holding on to Ms. Swan and would've signed the papers."

"Under normal circumstances?"

Jenks sighed. "Cullen, in my line of work, I've dealt with all sorts of bastards, and I can pretty much spot'em a mile away. I've become really good at knowing how they think, and what their next moves'll be. Hell, I _must_ be good at it," he snorted, "or else I wouldn't be where I am now."

"So what do you see happening here?"

"Ms. Swan has gone overnight from being an unknown young woman from a small town, with little financial resources, to suddenly being America's newest sweetheart, and what's more, being seriously involved with one of the most well-respected and wealthiest families in the country."

I placed my elbow over my desk and brought my hand up to my forehead, shaking my head.

"He's going to want money," I stated flatly.

"He's going to want money," Jenks confirmed.

* * *

**A/N: **

**Ichnilatis – means 'tracker' in Greek (or so Google tells me).**

**Would **_**you **_**like being 'America's Sweetheart?'**

**Reviews are as comforting as a soft terry robe. Leave one.**


	30. Chapter 29 Secret Desires

**A/N: Sorry for the delay. Good news is there will be two posts this week, as well as for the next couple of weeks, until we are done. So I'm thinking five or so more chapters after this one, but don't quote me on that. (wink)**

**Also, there will be three Epilogues to this story, from three different POVs, and yes, Maddie will be one of them. Those will post once a week, starting the week after this story is complete. (Not part of the five or so chapters mentioned above.)**

**My new story, 'If We Ever Meet Again,' will start posting in the next couple of weeks, so keep an eye open for that one. That should post twice a week for the first few weeks also, and then should settle down to about once a week. So there will be a lot of reading for you guys, if you're so inclined, in the next few weeks (smile). Put me on Author or Story Alert if you're interested in that.**

**I haven't had a chance to get back to all of you who reviewed last chapter, but please know I read and appreciated them all! You guys who stop to review truly make my day.**

**All characters (except for my little Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a little while longer.**

* * *

**Chapter 29 – Secret Desires**

**Chapter Song Rec: **_**Lady in Red**_** by Chris De Burgh**

**BPOV**

"How's your tuna, love?" Edward asked from across the small table. His green eyes sparkled as he waited for my answer. The glow of the small lamps around us illuminated his eager face and sent a ripple of light through his perfectly tousled bronze hair.

The restaurant Edward had chosen for our first dinner out alone was…beautiful, and very romantic, to say the very least. Soft lighting illuminated the dining area, huge vases arranged with gorgeous flowers lay majestically on top of elegant columns. Beautiful works of art graced the off-white walls. And the food…

Well…the food sucked.

No, that's wasn't right. I was pretty sure anyone with a discerning palette would've greatly enjoyed the dishes that had been coming out of the kitchen for the past few minutes. The problem was, where I came from, we tended to cook our fish before we ate it. The tuna in front of me looked like it might still swim if thrown back in the water.

Edward waited patiently for my answer.

"Delicious," I forced another bite down my throat, chasing it down quickly with the wine the chef had specially chosen for this dish.

He grinned widely and took another mouthful of his own tuna.

The chef appeared with our next dish, and the waiter quickly cleared our table. Yet another fresh set of utensils was placed before us, and then…the new course.

Tiny, raw little balls.

Damn it. Even I knew what that meant. My stomach churned.

"Mademoiselle Swan, Monsieur Cullen," the chef began, "Now it is my pleasure to serve you Osetra Caviar nestled in Tagliolini with warm Sea Urchin sauce."

"Sea Urchin sauce?" I swallowed.

"Yes mademoiselle."

I forced a smile.

"I have paired this dish with a bottle of 2009 Thalassitis, from the Gaia Estate in Santorini, Greece," the chef added proudly. He snapped his fingers and the waiter poured a fresh glass of white wine for the both of us.

The chef waited for us to taste his creation. I looked up at Edward, but, always the gentleman, he was waiting for me to go first.

With a plastered smile, I raised the fork to my lips.

I might as well have stuck a forkful of La Push in my mouth. .

Both Edward and the chef leaned closer to me; waiting.

"Mmmm." I chewed twice before swallowing quickly. The chef backed up with a smug grin.

This time, I drained my glass in one gulp.

Edward raised an eyebrow. "Like the wine huh?"

"Mm hmm," I murmured, giving him a thumbs up over the rim.

"Mademoiselle, would you like another glass?" the attentive waiter asked, picking up the open bottle from the table.

"Yes please. Keep it coming," I sighed into my glass. "Keep it coming."

OOOOOOOOOO

"How is it possible for you to _always smell so_ _good?_" I giggled in the cab, once we'd left the restaurant. I was leaned up against Edward. Suddenly, a huge hiccup erupted from my mouth. I giggled again and covered my mouth with one hand.

Edward draped his arm around me and pulled me closer. He turned his bright green eyes down to me.

"You know, you could've just told me you didn't like raw seafood. You didn't have to down five glasses of wine." He chuckled.

"But you were enjoying it so much." I pouted in his face. "I didn't want to be a party pooper."

He lifted a brow. "Did you just say party pooper?"

I shrugged. "Dunno. Did I?"

He chuckled again, pulling me into him and lowering his lips to my ear. "You're cute when you're drunk."

His breath fanned across my neck, sending more than the usual million shivers through my body, and that one innocent action felt like the biggest damn turn on. _Ever._

I angled myself closer, bringing my face up to his and my mouth just a half an inch from his lips.

"I'm not drunk. I'm just a tiny bit tipsy," I said, closing one eye and bringing my thumb and forefinger together in front of his face. I hiccupped again, and closed the space between our mouths, pulling on his bottom lip. "God _you taste_ _good too_," I groaned. "You're like a" – I concentrated hard to come up with the right words – "like a walking something or other for all five senses."

He raised both brows. "Bella love? I hate to tell you, but you took a wrong turn at tipsy and went straight to hammered."

I rolled my eyes. "Hammered shmammered." The inside of the cab swayed. "Whoa!" I laughed, resting my head against Edward's chest and listening to the smooth rhythm of his heart. I inhaled deeply again. His clean, manly scent washed over me. I sighed.

I must have closed my eyes for a little while, because next I knew Edward was paying the cab driver and carefully helping me out. Only, when we got out, I realized we weren't at my place or his.

"Where are we?"

"Central Park. You okay for a quick walk?" he asked, holding me carefully.

"Sure, sure," I said, fisting his coat by his chest between my hands.

He lowered his head to my field of vision. "Are you sure?" he smirked.

"Yup." I said, exaggerating the pop of the 'p.'

He pursed his lips doubtfully, and then wrapped an arm tightly around my waist to guide me through the park, lit at night with lampposts and bright lights embedded into huge rocks. We took a seat on one of the wooden benches along the frozen lake. It sparkled under the full moon. A few of the trees surrounding it had been decorated with thousands of white holiday lights, making the entire area glisten like a wintry postcard.

It was a cool night, but the wind was calm. Edward adjusted my scarf and hat carefully.

"I'm fine," I waved him off. "I feel pretty warm actually."

He smirked. "Yes. I'm sure you're pretty warm right now."

I wrapped my arms around him and tried to give him what I hoped was a seductive look. "I bet I can help you warm up too."

He chuckled and kissed me lightly. "Bit of a one track mind when you're drunk, huh?"

"I'm drunk on _you_," I answered, lowering my head to his neck and kissing and nipping. God he just _tasted so good, _especially after that God-awful meal. I started licking his neck, replacing the raw fish taste on my tongue with the taste of _him_.

A throaty groan erupted from Edward, making me smile. But he gently pulled my head up. His eyes looked black in the moonlight.

"Bella, you look _so _goddamned good tonight." His kissed me again softly. I was suddenly glad I'd let Alice get me ready for tonight, dressing me up in her dark blue cashmere dress - which was shorter on me than it was on her - and tall black boots. "The way you look, even the way you're acting…you're driving me _crazy,_" he whispered.

I chuckled and made to lower my mouth back to his neck. He cupped my face between his hands and brought me back up.

"But…I don't think you'd appreciate waking up tomorrow morning to pictures of you and I engaged in lewd acts splattered on Page Six."

That image backed me up right away.

"What are we doing here then?" I asked. I wasn't so far gone that I didn't note the whiny tone of my voice, but I _was_ too far gone to stop it. "I'd much rather go home right now," I smiled salaciously.

He groaned again and chuckled, turning to his other side and mumbling something about "… the death of me." For the first time since we left the restaurant I realized he had a paper bag with him. Carefully, he opened up the bag and removed a foil package shaped like a swan, and two silver spoons. When he un-wrapped the foil, a huge piece of chocolate cake lay nestled on top of a fancy white porcelain plate I recognized from the restaurant.

"Ta da," Edward murmured.

"Dessert!" I squealed.

Sitting side by side and gazing out at the moon's reflection over the icy lake, we made quick work of the cake. After a couple of tries at feeding myself, where the cake landed on my coat instead of my mouth, Edward took over the job, and the extra fork was quickly discarded.

When the cake was gone and I was licking the fork clean, Edward turned to me teasingly.

"What happened to you being too full for dessert?"

I shrugged. "That was when I thought dessert would consist of a Nemo Flan, or something like that, served up with a drizzle of codfish sauce on the side."

He laughed. "No raw seafood then."

I shook my head and ran my tongue around the fork's tines. I may have exaggerated the motions a bit, enjoying the way Edward was watching me.

"Nope." I popped the 'p' again. "No raw seafood."

"I love learning new things about you every day."

I lifted half my mouth up. "Take me home and I'll show you more new things about me you've yet to discover."

I grinned at the way that wiped the grin off of his face. "Jesus, Bella. I swear you're going to make me attack you right here if you keep saying things like that." He leaned closer to me over the empty plate between us, licking his lips. I closed my eyes and puckered. His mouth met the edge of mine, and then I felt his tongue peek out and lick me there. I opened my eyes.

He pulled back and smiled wryly, pointing at the edge of his mouth with his forefinger. "You had some chocolate frosting there."

"Edward?"

"Yes?"

"Take me home. _Now._"

"Whatever you say."

We walked quickly, wrapped around each other. I barely took my eyes off of Edward, which created a bit of a problem in my admittedly inebriated state, but he didn't complain about practically having to carry me out of there. We reached the sidewalk and he kept one arm around my waist while he tried to hail a cab. Every few seconds, Edward would turn and nuzzle my neck, murmuring the most wonderful things in my ear and making my body tingle. At one point, he turned and wrapped both arms around my waist and started moving me from side to side.

"Lady in Blue, is dancing with me, cheek to cheek…" he sang just below my ear.

I laughed. "I think that's 'Lady in Red,' and I wouldn't consider this dancing, since I'm balancing myself on your feet."

He was about to say something, his eyes sparkling with mirth, when he suddenly stiffened and his eyes locked on something behind me. His sharp jaw snapped together audibly, and his shoulders squared. Nostrils flaring, he pulled me in closer. My heart started racing, even though I had no idea why he was reacting that way.

Edward looked absolutely…terrifying. And furious.

And holy Jesus, so hot.

I turned my head and followed his gaze to a tall, brawny-looking guy walking our way. With my vision still slightly blurred from the copious amounts of wine I'd consumed, it took me a little longer to focus on the man's face. Edward abruptly looked from him to me, and then the man passed us by with little fanfare, other than the hard glare he gave Edward that clearly said 'What the fuck is your problem, man?'

Which I had to admit, was pretty much my exact thought at the moment.

When I looked at Edward again, he was exhaling in obvious relief.

"What the heck was that all about?" I asked.

He shook his head, clearly upset. "It was…I just thought I recognized that guy. That's all."

"And?" I questioned, still confused.

"And…nothing," he answered vaguely. He wrapped his arm tightly around my waist again and tried to hail a cab again. "I shouldn't have brought you out here tonight. It was stupid of me."

"Why?" I said. "I had a great time."

"It was stupid!" he barked succinctly. I jerked back, completely surprised by his tone.

He sighed and turned to face me, gripping tightly to my waist. "It's late and dark and this is New York and…" – he ran a hand through his hair, and then cupped my cheek – "I'm sorry Bella. I just…the guy made me nervous, that's all." A cab finally stopped for us, and Edward smiled at me apologetically. "Come on, let's get you home. You shouldn't be out here right now."

We didn't say anything more about it as we made our way back to Brooklyn, and I chalked up the butterflies in my stomach to my still slightly intoxicated state.

OOOOOOOOOO

I woke up in the morning with a pounding headache, a dry mouth, an aversion to all forms of light, and little memory of anything that happened after we left the restaurant the night before.

Edward walked into the bedroom a few minutes later carrying a tray with a full cup of orange juice, a couple of slices of toast, and a couple of aspirins. He sat down on the edge of the bed and placed the tray in front of me.

I sat up slowly.

"How do you feel?"

I licked my dry lips. "Like I took a swim in the dirtiest corner of Coney Island and then swallowed half of the beach up afterwards."

He chuckled lightly and handed me the aspirin, holding the juice cup up for me until I was ready for it. I drained it.

"Is Maddie up yet?" I asked, once I was done.

He smirked. "It's almost noon love. She's been up for a few hours now."

I groaned and threw myself back on the bed. My head rattled. "Ohhh," I groaned.

He chuckled and placed the tray aside to lower his mouth to mine. And despite the fact that I had my first hangover since high school prom, and that my mouth tasted like the bottom of the sea, his lips on mine still felt like heaven. Which made me think of something else.

"Did we…did you and I…" – he raised an eyebrow, waiting for me to finish – "did we make love last night?"

He pursed his lips. "We got home, you joked around with Alice for a while and promised to go shopping with her today" – I groaned again; he chuckled – "and then passed out as soon as you hit the bed." He pecked my lips once more. "You were all talk and no action last night."

I closed my eyes. "Sorry."

He snorted and lowered his lips to my neck. "Don't apologize, Bella," he murmured between kisses. "I want every single time you and I make love to be unforgettable." He looked back up at me teasingly. "Last night you couldn't even remember your apartment number. By the way," he chuckled, "remind me to send Mrs. Hernandez some flowers to apologize for waking up her baby when _someone_ knocked on the wrong door."

I groaned again and Edward laughed against my jaw.

Alice arrived about an hour later, all ready for the shopping trip promise she'd extracted from me while I'd been three sheets to the wind. I tried to argue my way out of it, claiming temporary insanity, but she wasn't having it. Edward didn't help by volunteering to take Maddie to the zoo for the day.

Edward dropped Alice and me off in Midtown, before heading to the zoo with Maddie. I gave Maddie a kiss and made her promise to hold Edward's hand. But before I could climb out of the car, Edward grabbed on tightly to my hand.

"Bella…be careful." There was a strange intensity to his request, and I vaguely remembered something from last night, by the curb. But then Alice was pulling me out of the car and rattling my still-sore brain, so I didn't have time to dwell on it.

It was only about a week and a half until Christmas, and I did still have some presents to get, so I supposed this shopping trip would've been inevitable anyway. I'd already gotten Maddie the trunk of dress–up clothes she'd asked Santa for, as well as a new art station I'd found for her, complete with paper and markers, water colors, and crayons. I knew she'd love it. So I spent the afternoon with Alice picking up gifts for her family, for Charlie, for Jake, Seth and Sue, and I even bought a pretty scarf for Leah. In the back of my mind I was grateful I wouldn't be seeing her for Christmas, lest she decide to wrap the pretty scarf around my neck. No, I'd be mailing my gifts. Maddie and I would be spending Christmas and New Year's with Edward and his family this year at their house in Long Island. I would miss Charlie, but at least I knew things between him and Sue Clearwater had progressed greatly in the months since I'd been in New York. Charlie wouldn't be alone for the holidays.

Alice and I sat at a small little café on Fifth Avenue once we were done with the whirlwind Christmas shopping spree, waiting for Edward and Maddie to pick us up. Christmas shopping with Alice had been no easy feat; I was sure even the stores lining Madison would need the rest of the weekend to recover. Mountains of bags filled to the rim with presents surrounded us. We chatted pleasantly over our sandwiches and Espressos, about any and all topics that sprang into Alice's busy mind, especially the Nutcracker recital less than a week away now. Both Alice and Maddie could barely talk of anything else for the past couple of days. But then conversation switched back to Christmas presents.

"I didn't see anything in those bags for Edward," Alice teased, sticking an olive in her mouth.

I smiled, knowing the opening was just her way of digging for information

"As if I could find _anything_ for the man who has _everything_ in any of the stores lining Madison," I answered vaguely.

"What _did_ you get him?" she asked straight out.

I stared at her.

"Oh come on Bella! I won't tell him! I promise." She gazed up at me through her eyelashes imploringly. Then she tried a different angle. "Well, I don't know what he's getting _you_," she smiled tauntingly, "but I _do_ know what he got Maddie."

I bit my lip, fighting with myself.

I sighed. "Alright. I'll tell you, but not because I want you to tell me what he got Maddie. I think I'm better off not knowing that anyway." Knowing Edward, it would be something miles beyond generous that would make me cringe.

She squealed and jumped up and down in her seat expectantly.

I rolled my eyes at her. "You know Edward's secretary, Ange?" I asked Alice. She nodded. "Well, she was telling me a couple of weeks ago about this place she and her boyfriend went skiing to last year, up in Vermont? And I started thinking that…"

"Oh My God Bella that's just perfect!" Alice squealed again. "When?"

"After the holidays. Mid-January, just for the weekend."

Even that was straining my budget. But after everything Edward did for Maddie and me, I wanted to do something special for him.

"That's perfect!" Alice gushed. "Let's see," she tapped her mouth with one finger thoughtfully. "I could take a break from wedding planning that weekend, and take Maddie up to see mom and dad, and around the city, and to American Girl Place to buy her more clothes for the doll I just bought her for Christmas, and I'm sure Rose will just be dying to-"

I frowned. "Wait. What do you mean-"

She chuckled. "Well, you'll be leaving Maddie with me, won't you? Don't you dare tell me you're leaving her with anyone else!"

"I…hadn't been planning on leaving her at all."

Alice smirked. "Bella, you and Edward should go by your selves. I'll take good care of Maddie." When I didn't answer, she added, "You trust me with her, don't you?"

"Alice, it's not that I don't trust you, I just hadn't even been thinking in that direction."

"You know that there's nothing wrong with going away with Edward, just the two of you, right?" she added gently.

I stared at her. "Alice," I sighed, "sometimes…sometimes all this just seems so…surreal to me. I'm not used to this," I suddenly found myself adding. "I'm not used to being…wanted the way Edward wants me, or treated the way he treats me. It's been just Maddie and me for so long…" I looked down at my Espresso, feeling ridiculous.

Her tiny hand suddenly covered mine. When I looked up at her, her expression was gentle, and caring.

"Let me tell you a quick story, Bella, that I've been meaning to tell you for a while now." She settled back into her seat comfortably. "I spent my whole life preparing to be a great dancer. I breathed dance, I ate dance. My mom and dad and my brothers supported me in my dream wholeheartedly. And I was good Bella," she chuckled with a wink. "I traveled the whole world for a while, performing in some of the best stages. For a few years there I saw very little of my family, but I told myself it was the sacrifice I had to accept to reach my goals." She suddenly got a far-away look in her eyes. "I remember the first time I met Jasper, during a short trip back home. Edward had brought him over to my parent's house, and I remember feeling a pull to him immediately, and getting pissed off about it, believe it or not," she chuckled. "But that too, I put on a back burner. I told myself that if we were meant to be, he'd still be there when _I_ was ready. When _I_ felt the time was right. I was too busy with my dance. The time wasn't right _for me_. Never for one moment did I consider back then that some things were just out of my control. My world revolved around dance, and I neither wanted nor needed anything or anyone else." Her smile turned wistful. "Then one night, after a grand performance at the Palais Garnier in Paris, I walked out feeling happy and triumphant…and was hit by a drunk driver."

I covered her hand with my own. She smiled and shrugged.

"For a while after that," she continued, "I had a hard time. I was angry at the world, at my life. Dance had been my only companion for so long, and I didn't know how to let anyone else in, how to _depend_ on someone else." Her familiar green eyes sparkled. "Jasper…he was there from the first moment I came back home. But…those first few months were rough. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to pull him near or push him away."

"Why?" I asked, even though I understood what she was saying.

She stared at me for a while before answering. "The thing is, Bella, I didn't feel ready. My career hadn't ended on _my_ terms, but on the terms of an asshole who didn't know better than to keep his drunk-ass away from the wheel of a car. I wasn't sure who or what I was anymore, and therefore, how could I fit Jasper into that hazy picture?" She looked at me carefully. "A friend of mine suggested counseling, and it was the best thing I could've done." She stopped.

We stared at each other for a few minutes.

"Wait. Are you saying you think I need counseling?"

"It's not a bad thing Bella."

"I know it's not a bad thing, but…why would I need counseling?"

Alice exhaled heavily. "Bella...your marriage, well, it didn't really end on your terms either." I averted her gaze again. She sighed. "Look, I know there are things you aren't ready to share, and maybe you'll never be ready to share them, and that's fine, but…maybe if you spoke to someone neutral…you'll be able to avoid the same push and pull scenario that I shared with Jasper for a while."

I didn't know what to say. Luckily, I was saved from having to say anything when Edward and Maddie arrived.

"Just…think about it, okay?" she asked, as Maddie ran through the door and jumped on my lap. I nodded.

OOOOOOOOOO

Maddie was getting her bedtime bath and telling me about all the fun she and Edward had at the zoo, especially the excitement she'd felt at seeing 'Santa's reindeer,' resting until their big day a little over a week away. We sang Christmas songs while she played in the tub, and then switched to what had become today's favorite, due to the tub of monkeys Edward had gotten her at the zoo; one of many souvenirs she'd come home with.

"Five little monkeys jumping on the bed," we sang together, "one fe-uh down and bwoke his head. Mama called the doctuh and the doctuh said, no mow-uh monkeys jumping on the bed. Fo-uh little monkeys…"

"Mommy," Maddie began, while I dried her off, "why come only evuh the momma monkey calls the doctuh? How come the daddy monkey nevuh calls the doctuh?"

I slipped her flannel top over her head, helping her pull her arms through. "Let's see. Maybe…maybe the daddy's busy putting a band-aid on the poor little monkey, while the mommy makes the phone call."

"Caws he loves his littoh monkey too? Just like the momma monkey does?" she asked, once her head popped through the opening.

"Of course," I said, kneeling in front of her and kissing her cheek, which was flushed from the warm bath. She looked thoughtful while I put her footed bottoms on.

"At the zoo today," she began, as most of her sentences this afternoon had started; next week's recital forgotten for the time being, "I was wunning to see the sea wions and I fe-uh."

"Oh sweetie," I said sadly, running my fingers through her long dark hair, "did you get hurt?"

"Only a wittoh bit," she shrugged. "But then Edwood picked me up and kissed his finguhs and put them on my booboo." She rubbed her shin to show me where the booboo had been. "And then I felt _all_ bettuh," she finished, with a sharp nod of the head for emphasis.

I smiled softly at her. "I'm glad sweetie."

She smiled back, looking pensive again. "Mommy, does everyone caw-uh the daddy daddy?"

I tilted my head questioningly, gazing into her big brown eyes while I sat on the edge of the tub and brushed her long dark hair. "Let's try that one again." Even I had trouble catching her meaning sometimes.

She huffed. Not being completely understood the first time annoyed her sometimes. She played with a few strands of my hair while she thought of another way to explain her question to me. "Juliana calls her daddy 'papi,' and baby Mary calls her daddy 'dada,' and sometimes _you_ call grampa 'Charlie'-"

"Different people call their daddies different names," I answered gently.

"Oh," she answered simply. Then she lowered her head back to the monkeys in her hand and started singing again. I pushed her brushed hair behind her shoulders and cupped her little chin to bring her eyes back up to mine.

"Sweetie, why-"

Three quick rasps at the door interrupted us. "Bella, you've got a call," Edward called out quietly.

I knew what that meant. Jake. Otherwise Edward would've just said who was on the phone. Since coming back from Forks, Jake's phone calls had considerably lessened, only about once or twice a week now. And while Edward never exactly broke into song and dance when Jake called, gone was the sulking silence that would overtake him when Jake would call before our visit to Forks. The fact that now Jake was well aware of Edward, and of Edward's place in my life, probably had something to do with it. As for Jake, the first call or two had been a bit awkward, but the last couple of calls had been enjoyably comfortable. I heard something different in Jake's voice lately. And the way he spoke to me, it was sort of like I was his…sister now. It made me hopeful.

"I think Uncle Jake's on the phone," I told Maddie.

"Ooh can I talk to him?" Maddie asked. "I want to tell him about the zoo today; and the penguin and monkeys Edwood got me."

She jumped into Edward's arms as soon as I opened the bathroom door.

"Are you ready for The Grinch?" Edward asked her. It had become her favorite bed time story over the past few nights.

"I want to talk to Uncoe Jake and te-uh him about the zoo," she answered.

He chuckled and handed her the phone with a wry grin.

"Uncoe Jake!" Maddie began excitedly, running to the Christmas tree. "Guess what? Edwood took me to the zoo today!"

I smiled and turned around to drain the tub and clean up Maddie's water toys, biting my lip as I thought of the conversation we'd just had. I wondered what her train of thought had been.

Edward walked into the small bathroom with me – it was about a quarter the size of his master bathroom back at his apartment – and picked up Maddie's wet towel and hung it up on its hook while I knelt in front of the tub and rinsed off her toys. Then he picked up her dirty clothes and placed them in the hamper.

Then I felt him kneeling behind me, his arms on either side of me, gripping on to the edge of the tub. He pressed himself into me and all of a sudden it was hard to concentrate on something as simple as cleaning up the tub.

He nibbled on my ear lobe. "What are you thinking about?" he murmured.

"What makes you think I'm thinking of anything?" I breathed, rinsing off my hands.

He chuckled. "I know most of your tells by now Bella. Especially that lip-biting one. That one's been a dead give-away since day one."

"Oh really?" I laughed weakly. I was done cleaning up, but feeling him behind me like that…it was too good for me to move. "So what am I thinking of now then, Mr. Mind-Reader?" I listened carefully and could still here Maddie chatting away with her uncle in the living room.

Edward moved my t-shirt away with his jaw and skimmed up and down my shoulder. "Mmm," he murmured thoughtfully. "You're thinking of how good I feel pressed up against you like this," he whispered, and pressed himself in deeper for illustrative purposes.

I half-gasped, half-laughed. "Jesus, you _are_ good at this."

He snorted. "Not really. I just happen to be thinking the same thing." He nipped me lightly against my shoulder. I lowered my head and whimpered. He chuckled. "You know, you owe me one for last night. I seem to recall someone making a whole lot of promises in the back seat of a cab and not living up to a single one."

"Well," I panted, "I can't be held responsible for what I don't remember."

"Then I guess I'll have to remind you."

"I guess you will." I was about to turn around bring my mouth to his, when something vibrated against me. "What the-"

Edward pulled away and reached for his cell phone. I turned around and wondered briefly why he had it on him. Usually he just kept it on top of the counter or something. When he pulled it out of his pocket, his eyes widened and his jaw tightened. His eyes came up to me.

"I've got to take this Bella," he said quickly, before getting up and stepping out of the bathroom.

I knelt there - a bit breathless and confused - for a few seconds before slowly getting up.

When I stepped into the living room, Edward was at the very end of the room, against the window, talking in hushed whispers. He had his back to me, so I couldn't see his face, but the rigidness of his shoulders made it obvious he was upset.

Having finally detailed her entire zoo visit to her Uncle, Maddie quickly said her good-byes and ran to hand me the phone.

"Alright Maddie, go to your room and get your book ready."

"Is Edwood gonna read to me?" she asked, glancing over at Edward. He was running his hand through his hair. Talk about tells.

"Either he or I will read to you as soon as we're done, okay sweetie?"

"'Kay mommy," she agreed, skipping towards her room.

"…been over a week and you still have no idea…" I heard Edward hiss, before lowering his voice again.

"Hey Jake," I said distractedly, unable to stop wondering what was going on with Edward.

"Sounds like Maddie had a hell of a day." Jake chuckled, unaware of my distraction.

I walked into the kitchen and started emptying the dishwasher while Jake and I spoke for a few minutes. Edward finished his phone call and headed to Maddie's room to read her story, and I finished up with Jake.

When I was done in the kitchen, I went to Maddie's room to say goodnight. She and Edward were just finishing up the Grinch. Edward and I kissed her goodnight, and as we stepped out of her room and closed the door three-quarters of the way, I looked up at Edward's face. He'd been smiling in Maddie's room, but now his expression seemed tight and slightly anxious.

"Everything okay?" I asked as we stepped back into the living room.

"Yeah," he sighed, sitting on the sofa and flipping through the TV. "Just one of the clients again."

I sat down next to him. My first instinct was to ask him which of the clients was giving him so much trouble lately, but then I stopped myself. Images of fights between Paul and me years ago suddenly swam through my head. Every time I'd caught him in a lie and questioned him. I shook my head infinitesimally. Edward wasn't Paul. I had no reason to give him the third-degree.

But a slight discomfort still gnawed at me even as I took my shower that night, while Edward waited for me in my bedroom. His shoulders had finally relaxed and he'd seemed to un-stiffen after a while, but he'd still seemed quieter than usual. Or maybe it had just been my imagination. I shook my head as I let the hot water wash over me. Between that and Maddie's inquiries earlier, my head felt stuffy.

Everything was moving so fast between Edward and me. Truth be told, we were basically living together for all intents and purposes. He'd spend most weeknights at my apartment, just because the logistics with Maddie were easier, since her sitter was just a few blocks away. And Maddie's questions about monkeys and daddies before…It all made me wonder…

Where exactly were Edward and I headed? I scrubbed my hair anxiously, reminding myself we'd been together for such a short period of time. But every day with him felt like an eternity, in the most perfect sense of the word. I lifted my head and let the shampoo suds fall against my face, washing away the dirt along with the guilt I suddenly felt. How could I expect him to make a permanent commitment to Maddie and me after such a short period of time?

I sighed and finished my shower, anxious to lose myself in Edward's arms in the here and the now. It was too soon to ask for forever of him, no matter how much _I_ may have wanted it.

OOOOOOOOOO

**A/N: Reviews are better than raw seafood. Leave one.**

**See you in a couple of days; will still be BPOV.**


	31. Chapter 30 Surprise, Surprise

**A/N: I'd like to try to clarify something from the last chapter. The guy walking in Central Park when Edward and Bella were there was NOT Paul. Bella, regardless of how drunk she may have been, would've recognized him. Why was Edward so upset then? Imagine you don't know where someone you're looking for is. Someone who you DON'T want around. You start picturing him everywhere, don't you? And remember, Edward has never met Paul. He's seen pics of him, but that's about it. Obviously, if so many of you had questions, I wasn't as clear about it as I would've liked to be. Sorry.**

**Now, I'd like to ask you all to strap yourselves in…the end starts now…**

**All characters (except my little Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a little while longer…**

* * *

**Chapter 30 – Surprise, Surprise**

**BPOV**

The next few days flew by quickly. Between Christmas fast approaching and last minute prep for Maddie's first recital, a thick layer of excitement hung around us. Edward's sort of strange behavior of the last few days got pretty much relegated to the back of my mind in the face of all the approaching activity. Besides, he was acting just fine now; maybe being a little more protective than usual - always telling me to be careful and such. But then again, I'd come to realize, Edward was just a very protective man. The holidays probably just had him on edge a bit.

The morning of Maddie's Christmas Recital, we brought her into work with us. The show would take place at Lincoln Center that night, and Alice had been even more of a bundle of energy for the past twenty-four hours. Somehow, in between everything else she had to take care of, she still managed to find time to call me every few hours to remind me how to pin Maddie's tiara up so it wouldn't fall during the dance, to put her hair up in a bun but to leave a few stray strands in the front, to make sure I took the correct tights with me, and on and on.

Mid-morning, Maddie and I took a quick break down to the vending cart to get her a banana and a container of orange juice. The cut up apples we'd brought from home suddenly didn't appeal to her. I tried to hurry. Even though it was just a few days until Christmas and there was a more laid-back feel in the office so close to the holidays, I still felt self-conscious about having her at work with me, especially with what people had been saying up until a couple of weeks ago. And even though most people in the office had gotten over all that, there were still a few who looked at me sideways when I passed by. I didn't want to give anyone any more to talk about.

I'd picked up a cranberry muffin for Rosalie while we'd been downstairs; it was her latest craving. Once back upstairs, Maddie and I made our way to her office to give it to her.

Rosalie's secretary wasn't at her desk, and the door to Rose's office hung slightly ajar. I couldn't think of any meetings Rose had scheduled for this morning, so I took Maddie's hand and, balancing the paper bag of snacks in my other arm, attempted an awkward knock before pushing it open slowly.

A snippet of Rose's voice carried in the air before the door opened up all the way.

"…worry about me, because I can take care of myself, but don't tell me this is just a business-decision, because it's _not_!" Rose hissed angrily. "You _need_ to tell her-"

She stopped when she saw me, her blue eyes more incensed than I thought I'd ever seen them. I was surprised to see Emmett, Jasper, Edward _and_ Rose's secretary Liz in her office, all seated tightly around her desk. Rose was standing in front of her desk, and Edward was the only other one standing. When Rose stopped and looked towards her door, Edward turned around.

If I'd thought Rose looked inflamed, Edward's expression was furious, and nervous, and…frightened. His jaw was clenched tightly and his usually warm eyes looked cold and hard.

"Edwood!" Maddie exclaimed happily and ran to him, oblivious to his expression.

Everyone turned around then, and I realized that they all wore similar expressions to Edward's, though to varying degrees; Edward's was by far the extreme. Rosalie's secretary simply looked frightened.

"Hey princess." He said shakily, picking her up. The hardness in his expression softened, but didn't disappear completely. "Having fun?"

"Uhuh," she answered. "Me and mommy got snacks."

"Did you now?" he asked, but his voice was so off. He frowned. "I thought you brought snacks from home this morning."

"Appuhs ah yucky!" she exclaimed, making a face.

He pursed his lips. "Well, you made sure to hold mommy's hand when you went downstairs right?"

"Uh-huh." His frown deepened anyway.

"Liz," Rose addressed her secretary, "why don't you show Maddie those pictures of your new dog you were showing around the office this morning? Maddie, do you want to see them?"

"A new doggy? Is he a puppy?" Maddie exclaimed with excitement. "Is he tiny?"

"He is a puppy." Rose's secretary answered, glancing nervously at Rose. Then she turned to Maddie and smiled gently. "And he is very tiny." She started to get up. Edward put Maddie down.

"Mommy, Edwood, can I go see the pichus?" Maddie asked.

Edward smiled at her and nodded.

"Sure baby," I agreed. "Mommy'll be right there."

"What happened?" I asked as soon as Liz and Maddie stepped out. Edward's face had turned to stone again. His eyes moved warily to Rose. Except for when I'd first walked in, he hadn't met my eyes the whole while I'd been here.

Rose turned back to Edward at my question. He took a deep breath but said nothing, keeping his eyes on her.

After a few moments of what looked like some sort of stare down between the two, Rose clenched her jaw and closed her eyes. She inhaled before opening them back up and turning them towards me.

"Lauren was fired this morning."

"What? Why?" I asked.

Again, Rosalie didn't answer right away. But it didn't seem like she didn't want to answer, more like…she was waiting for someone else to answer. She drew her lips in tightly when nothing but silence continued, and snorted angrily, opening her mouth to speak. Edward cut her off.

"She was no longer happy here, and her work was reflecting that attitude." His voice was cool and composed now, but he kept his eyes on Rose as he spoke. "She was escorted out of the building a few minutes ago."

"Escorted out of the building?" I repeated incredulously. But though I addressed myself towards Edward, he wouldn't look my way.

Rose was the one who turned to answer me. She arched an eyebrow unapologetically. "She walked into my office, made some demands I turned down, we had some words…" – she shrugged – "I wasn't about to let her wander around the office after that. I'd bet my ass she was the one behind all the negative publicity surrounding this agency a few weeks ago. And after this…" she trailed off, glaring Edward's way again.

I could only stand there, shocked. Lauren and I had never gotten along, yet I couldn't help wondering what exactly had happened for it to come to that. But Rose had stressed from the beginning of our friendship that there was a clear distinction between our professional relationship and our personal relationship, and obviously this fell in the realm of professional.

I looked back at Edward. He was still glaring at Rose warily.

"Is there…anything I can do?" I wasn't sure what else to say.

It was Emmett that answered this time.

"Bella, Rose will probably have to split Lauren's accounts and responsibilities between you and the rest of the creative team, until we can find someone to replace her." He smiled apologetically. "I'm afraid you'll be even busier until then."

"That's no problem," I shook my head quickly. "I'll help however I can."

Emmett nodded. For once, his smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

"We should probably start making some phone calls," Jasper added. "Let Lauren's client contacts know she's no longer with us."

Emmett exhaled heavily. "It's going to be a _long_ afternoon."

Edward and I had planned to leave a couple of hours early that afternoon, to get to Lincoln Center early and get Maddie ready and settled in. The rest of his family was to meet us there later. I addressed him again, even though he'd barely acknowledged my presence since I'd walked in.

"Edward, if you need to stay later today, that's fine. You can meet us at the recital-"

"No!" Edward growled suddenly, turning anxious green eyes my way. I jerked my head back, startled. Everyone else seemed to be just as surprised as I was.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, before opening them back up. "I'm sorry." His eyes looked full of remorse, so I nodded. "We'll be leaving together, just as we'd planned."

And although I couldn't deny being frazzled and upset, I nodded again. Lauren had been a bitch, but replacing her was going to be difficult, especially this time of year. It was understandable for him to be upset, though I wasn't too happy about his taking it out on me.

And upset he was. He barely said more than a handful of words all the way to Lincoln Center. Maddie was easily distracted and entertained with the Dr. Seuss Grinch movie playing in the Volvo's DVD player, as well as the picture perfect way the city was decorated a few days before Christmas. Holiday lights hanging everywhere, huge wreaths suspended from thick wires over almost every street, the merry sounds of Christmas bells from street-corner Santa's. It would've been enough to get me in the holiday spirit too…if it wasn't for the grinch sitting next to me.

For half a second, a rogue thought raced through my head; that perhaps Edward was more upset at the fact that Lauren had been fired _at all_, rather than the difficulties her empty position would represent in the immediate future. His strange phone calls suddenly came to mind. And then, in the next millisecond, I got a flash of Tanya in the lobby of Edward's building, asking me if I was familiar with the rules of Edward's game.

The whole idea had taken no more than two seconds to make its way into my head. In the next second, I hung my head guiltily and turned towards my window, a heavy feeling of shame washing over me. Edward had a right to be upset today. He'd done nothing to earn my distrust. Yet here I was; still doubting him.

I drew in a deep breath and turned to Edward as he parked the car with his eyes locked more rigidly than usual on his side mirror. I put my hand over his free one over the console.

"Babe, it'll be okay. I know you're upset about what happened with Lauren. But don't worry, you guys will find someone well qualified to fill her position soon."

He finished parking and turned his eyes to me. Gone was the cold, sterile look he'd worn in Rosalie's office. Now he simply looked more worried than anything. He smiled gently at me and cupped my face between his hands.

"This isn't something you need to worry about love. I won't _let this_ be something you need to worry about. I'll take care of everything."

His words confused me. Somehow it seemed like…we were talking about two different things.

Lincoln Center was filled with hundreds of girls and boys of varying ages preparing for the show. Alice and her assistants ran to and fro, getting the ensemble ready and shouting out instructions. Maddie's inclusion in the show tonight had turned the recital into a media event, and the paparazzi waited hungrily outside to catch a glimpse of us walking in. It was annoying, to say the least, but thankfully, they weren't allowed inside, so at least we wouldn't have to worry about them during the show.

At first, Edward's tenseness didn't let up much once we were inside. Although Alice had plenty of chaperones backstage to help with the younger children, as well as a strict procedure set up to make sure every single child was released to the proper adult, Edward gave Maddie's chaperone a hard time when it was time to leave her backstage before the show. He drilled her over and over with instructions, telling her to always keep an eye on Maddie, and to make sure she didn't release her to _anyone_ other than him or me. And while I was a bit anxious about leaving her back there too, even I felt he was taking it a bit overboard. Eventually, Alice had to come intervene.

"What is your problem?" she hissed at him, while at the same time trying to call out last minute orders over her shoulder. "I do this every year Edward. I haven't misplaced a child yet!"

Edward's nostrils flared. "Maddie is not just _any_ child Alice!" he hissed back. I stood between them, my face flaming red at Edward's unexplained attitude.

"I know that Edward," she replied through clenched teeth. "No child here is just _any_ child!" She moved in closer to us, lowering her voice even further. "I would _never_ let anything happen to Maddie. You both know that!" she whispered roughly.

"I know Alice, I know," I agreed. I put a calming hand on Edward's arm. "Edward, Maddie will be just fine." His mouth was drawn in a tight line, and his eyes narrowed warily. He took a quick look around the back of the stage before turning back to Alice.

"Take. Care. Of her," he gritted through his teeth. Then he grabbed my hand and led me away. I turned back once to look at Alice. She raised her shoulders in a 'what the hell is his problem?' manner. I simply gave her an apologetic smile.

Esme and Carlisle met us at our row of seats. They both greeted me warmly, and Esme gave her son a tender hug. Carlisle greeted Edward rather stiffly though, which surprised me, because although I knew they'd had problems in the past, their relationship appeared to be improving in the past couple of months. Jasper, Rose and Emmett made it in just as the lights were dimmed in the auditorium.

We sat through the show quietly, watching Alice's school of students perform Tchaikovsky's timeless classic gracefully. I watched them mesmerized, that such beauty could be captured by such young protégés. I'd never been on the graceful side myself, but that didn't mean I couldn't appreciate it when I saw it.

A few times during the performance, I glanced at Edward. He held my hand tightly over our seats, and his eyes were studiously on the stage, but his thoughts appeared to be a million miles away.

Until Maddie took the stage.

Edward sat straight up, and suddenly his entire demeanor changed. A huge smile graced his beautiful face. And although my eyes were glued to the dancing ballerina on-stage, I could practically feel the tightness he'd been carrying in his muscles melt away.

Maddie looked adorable. Her sugar plum costume - a long, thick layer of tulle trimmed in sequins set off with a burgundy velvet top trimmed in pink sequins – flowed beautifully on her as she twirled and twirled gracefully. A happy yet shy smile graced her little caramel face, as she performed her plies and releves and every other step Alice had taught her over the past few months. When her dance ended, Edward stood up right away and clapped and whistled so hard the tears fell from my eyes insistently.

"Maddie, Maddie!" Emmett called out in his large, booming voice, and finally, Maddie saw us. Her eyes found us in the middle of the auditorium, and her shy smiled erupted into a huge grin. She curtsied just as she'd been taught to, and to every Cullen's delight, blew a kiss our way just before leaving the stage.

The Cullens went wild, hollering and hooting and whistling through their teeth. When we sat back down, Edward turned to me and placed a soft, lingering kiss on my lips. His eyes were shining brightly when he pulled back, leaving me slightly dazed.

"Thank you," he whispered.

"For what?"

"For allowing me to be a part of this."

Not knowing what to say, I kissed him back softly.

I felt Emmett nudge Edward, from where he sat at his other side. "Hey, hey you two," he chuckled lowly. "Save that for later. This here's a kid's show." Edward rolled his eyes and smiled, looking more relaxed than he had all day.

An hour and a half later, the show was still going, and I had to pee badly. Maddie had come out a couple of more times, but I knew that her scenes were done for the evening.

I turned quietly to Edward. "I'll be right back," I whispered.

He frowned. "Where are you going?"

"I'll be right back," I repeated, squeezing my thighs tightly.

He pursed his lips. "I'll go with you."

I stared at him. "Edward, I'll be right back."

His lips fell in a tight line. "Hurry up," he whispered.

I rolled my eyes and got up.

I barely made it to the stall, and sighed with relief as I emptied my bladder. With Maddie's scenes over for the evening, I was anxious for the show to end already. I grimaced guiltily. Alice would kill me if she knew that.

I made my way quickly through the lobby, anxious to make it back before the show ended and all the students came out on stage for their final bow. A few people were loitering around the lobby here and there, parents and relatives of the children on stage, some probably stretching their legs after their kid's performances and anxious for the end too.

A few feet from the doors into the auditorium, a tall, tan-skinned man in a dark suit walking my way stopped a few inches away from me.

"Isabella Swan?" he asked.

I stopped, surprised. "Uh, yes."

He smiled widely. "Does it really surprise you to be recognized so easily nowadays?"

I felt my face flush, knowing he was referring to all the media lately.

"Sorry," he chuckled once. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

I swallowed but didn't answer.

"My name is Felix Vega," he said, putting a hand out to shake mine. "I work at-"

"The Twilight Group," I finished for him, shaking his hand firmly. I recognized his name easily. His group was a rival of CCW's.

He smiled appreciatively. "Yes. It's great to meet you. Congratulations on your CLIO nomination."

"Thank you," I smiled. "It's good to meet you too. And congratulations on your own nomination."

"Thanks," he laughed, and his dark eyes sparkled in a friendly manner. "We've seen your work at Twilight," he continued, with something like admiration in his voice, "and I must say, we've been very impressed."

"Thank you," I said again. "I've enjoyed some of the work coming from your group also," I smiled. His eyes sparkled again. He seemed to be a pleasant man; friendly and complimenting, even though we technically belonged to rival ad agencies.

"How are things going at CCW for you?"

I raised my brows, surprised by his question. "They're…going very well, thank you."

"Happy there?" he asked. I frowned and he followed up quickly. "I mean, of course I know, _everyone _knows, of your relationship with…" he shrugged and made a motion with his hands, as if saying, 'we both know who I'm talking about.'

"I'm very happy there," I answered coolly now. "It's a great group, and we're doing some great work there."

"I agree," he nodded emphatically, "You are." He laughed again. "Please don't take my comment the wrong way Isabella. And please know that I say this with the utmost respect for your work and talent. If things ever happen to go south…at CCW, please don't hesitate to give us a call. We would love to have someone with your talent-"

"Bella!" I suddenly heard. My head whipped to the doors to the auditorium, a few short feet away. Edward was standing there, glaring my way furiously. In three quick strides he was behind Felix, and before the man could turn, Edward put his hand on his shoulder and swung him around.

"Edward!" I hissed under my breath.

When his eyes landed on Felix, Edward looked momentarily startled.

"Cullen," Felix greeted him, shaking Edward's hand off his shoulder.

"Vega," Edward answered. "I apologize. I thought you may have been..." He didn't finish his sentence before his surprised expression turned into a scowl. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"My niece is in the recital."

"Really?" Edward smirked. "How convenient."

"I don't know how convenient it is for me," Felix laughed. "Can't say I've particularly enjoyed sitting through over two hours of ballet."

Edward glared at him.

"I was just wishing Bella good luck on her CLIO nod," Felix added, still smiling.

"Luck has nothing to do with it," Edward said. "_Isabella," _he stressed sharply, placing one hand on the small of my back_, "_will do just fine."

Felix stared steadily at Edward, the smile still in place but something else entirely in his eyes. He snorted.

"Always good to see you Cullen," he finally said, then turned back to me.

"_Isabella._" He smiled sardonically. "It was good to meet you." He shook my hand again. "Hopefully we'll have another opportunity to speak in the future."

"It was good to meet you too." I didn't address the rest of his statement.

Edward glowered at his back as he walked away.

"What in the world was that all about?" I whispered roughly once Felix was back in the auditorium.

"I thought you said you'd be right back," he said tightly, putting his hand on my arm and ignoring my question.

"Edward, I was gone for ten minutes. What is going on with you tonight?"

His eyes met mine carefully. "Come on." He took my hand and led us back to the auditorium, with no apparent intention of answering my question. "They're about to take their final bows."

After their final bows, we picked Maddie up from back stage. Edward and I and the rest of his family gave her big hugs and kisses and congratulations on her first recital. I knelt beside her proudly, tears stinging my eyes. She looked so beautiful in her little leotard, her eyes bright and cheeks rosy from all the excitement.

"Mommy and Edwood, did you see me?" she asked, lacing her fingers around Edwards, who stood next to me. "Did you see me up theuh?"

"Of course we did sweetie. You did so well!"

"That's what Aunt Ally said!" she answered happily. She was having a hard time balancing all the flowers she'd received from all of us for her performance.

"Here, let mommy hold your flowers," I said, taking the flowers from her. Edward knelt down next to me, in front of Maddie.

"Edwood, that was so much fun!" she squealed, jumping up and down happily. Edward wrapped his arms around her. She held on to him tightly.

"You looked so beautiful up there. Just like a little princess."

"Silly Edwood," she giggled. "I wasn't a pwincess, I was a shugah plum faewy!"

Edward laughed. He moved back carefully and took her right wrist, clasping something on it.

"This is an early Christmas present," he said gently. "Because you were the prettiest sugar plum fairy up there."

Maddie brought her wrist up next to her face, tilting her head to study the item sparkling under the bright back stage lights. A silver charm bracelet hung delicately from her small wrist. Two shiny charms dangled from it, one of a ballerina in mid-pirouette and another of a tiny princess.

Maddie's big brown eyes widened. Her entire face lit up and her mouth turned up in a huge grin.

"Do you like it?" Edward asked her.

She turned her big eyes back to him. "It's bootiful Edwood!" She threw her arms around him. "Thank you so much!" she exclaimed happily, giving him a loud kiss on the cheek.

He chuckled and held her carefully. "You're very welcome princess. I've got another charm for you, but you'll have to wait until Christmas for that one." Maddie barely seemed to hear him, too entranced by the tinkling noise her new bracelet made as she jiggled it happily.

I watched them carefully, torn between continued fascination with the way they interacted together…

…and resentment at not having been told about the present he'd planned to give her tonight.

We all went out to dinner afterwards, to a place called Serendipity 3 on East Sixtieth. For dessert, we ordered Maddie their signature dessert, a colossal size cup of Frozen Hot Chocolate. My daughter was in heaven. I was just happy that there was no raw seafood on the menu.

A good thing, because the way I was feeling, it might have ended up in Edward's face.

OOOOOOOOOO

We were spending the night at Edward's Penthouse, because it made no sense to go back to Brooklyn tonight.

After getting Maddie in bed, I threw on one of Edward's old Dartmouth sweatshirts, a pair of his boxers and a pair of my thick slipper socks, and went to stand on the terrace while I waited for him to finish his shower. I knew he was probably waiting for me, but I needed to organize my thoughts first. I gazed out into the dark – or as dark as New York City ever got, both city and holiday lights still twinkling brightly – trying to make sense of everything that had happened today.

Lauren's firing had definitely upset Edward. And although his attitude and tenseness had at first seemed a bit extreme to me, now that I was out here by myself, in the semi-quiet of the night and with my own stress of the day behind me, I could focus on it better. I could also understand it better.

Of course he'd be upset. CCW was Edward's pride and joy. He, as well as Emmett and Jasper, had started the agency from scratch. They'd all put their hearts and souls into making it into what it was today. The agency was their baby, for all intents and purposes. I had no idea what Lauren and Rosalie had argued about, but knowing Lauren, I could only imagine the vitriol that must've spewed out of her mouth. My anger and resentment towards Lauren only increased when I thought about the fact that Rosalie was pregnant for God's sakes. She and Emmett had gone public with that information after the holidays. I couldn't imagine what kind of woman would purposely start trouble with a pregnant woman.

'…_worry about me, because I can take care of myself…'_ Rosalie had been saying when I walked into her office. She must've been referring to her pregnancy. I shook my head, looking down the terrace at the countless yellow cabs still speeding down the streets. Edward had probably told her something about being careful, and Rosalie, being the tough cookie that she was, hadn't appreciated it. I knew how protective Edward was – towards everyone he cared about, especially his family. That Lauren had upset Rose while she was pregnant had probably added to his stress about the situation.

And now, regardless of how lackluster Lauren's performance may have been in the past couple of months, the agency would be shorthanded until a replacement could be found.

So of course it made sense for Edward to have been upset all day. The agency was important to him. His family was important to him.

What I still couldn't understand was why he'd reacted so…strangely, to say the least, when he'd found me speaking to Felix Vega in the lobby tonight. Yes, he was a business rival, but he seemed to be an all-around nice guy. Yet the way Edward had glowered with fury when he'd first caught sight of us…it was as if he'd caught me with his own personal foe.

And why hadn't he even mentioned the fact that he was going to give Maddie a bracelet tonight? Edward was the most generous man I'd ever met, and I knew if it were up to him he'd be buying Maddie and me gifts all the time. I also knew that if I planned to have any sort of future with him, I was going to have to accept at least some of his extreme generosity. But why couldn't he have just _told _me?

Behind me, I heard the glass door to the terrace slide open, and then slide closed. I kept my eyes forward, trying to organize my thoughts and my words once more.

Edward slipped his hands, warmed by his shower, under my sweatshirt and wrapped them around my stomach. He brought his head down and rested it on the crook of my neck, placing a soft kiss there. I could feel the dampness of his freshly washed hair against my neck. Goose bumps rose on my arms, but not due to the cold. We stood there silently for a few minutes, staring straight ahead.

Edward turned his head into my neck again, skimming his nose up and down softly.

"I love it when you wear my sweatshirts and boxers," he chuckled.

"Hmm," I responded simply.

He sighed. "It was a long day." I nodded.

"You're upset," he whispered against my neck.

"No Edward," I said softly. "Look, I understand…" I sighed, "that today was a difficult day for you. Lauren's leaving won't be easy for the agency right now. So believe me, I do get why you've been so…stressed all day."

He snorted against my neck, his hot breath raising the fine little hairs along my nape. It was a very sarcastic sort of snort though. "Yes. Lauren. _That's_ why I've been stressed today."

I turned around in his arms. Though the temperature was in the low forties, he was only wearing dark flannel sleep pants that hung low on his hips. His bare chest heaved lightly, the muscles in his stomach contracting with each breath. But despite the frigid temperature, he didn't seem the least bit bothered by it. He seemed to be…burning actually.

"Is there another reason?" I asked.

He gazed at me steadily. "No. There isn't."

I held his gaze. "Like I said, I understand why that would upset you." I inhaled deeply. "What I don't understand is why you acted the way you did when you saw me with Felix Vega tonight."

He exhaled sharply and let go of me, moving to my side and staring out into the trees of Central Park across the street. He ran one hand through his damp hair, making it stick up wildly, before gripping the terrace railing tightly. His jaw was clenched again, and his face stoic.

"I…just…I don't like the guy Bella, that's all."

I crossed my arms in front of me. "It looked like more than that to me. When you first saw him…it was as if you wanted to kill him. But then you looked like…you'd made a mistake or something-"

He turned to face me, cutting me off. "Look, you know the kind of guy I used to be?"

It took me a couple of seconds to realize he was waiting for a response. I nodded.

"Well, Felix is pretty much the same kind of guy."

I frowned. "And?"

"And," he muttered, "And I don't want guys like that around you."

"Are you serious?" I asked. "Is that what that was about?"

"Look Bella, I know how guys like that think."

I just stared at him at first, because I wasn't sure what to say. My first impulse had been to tell him how much he'd just sounded like Paul used to sound when he was hiding something.

"Edward, I'm a grown woman," I said evenly. "I think I can handle someone like Felix Vega."

"I don't _want you_ to have to handle men like that."

"Once again Edward, I'm a grown woman. And you _can't_ always be there to take care of me."

He snorted and shook his head. "I realize that. Trust me, I realize that." He ran his hand through his hair again, as if the realization bothered him infinitely. "But when I can be, I _will_ be." He spoke the words with an air of finality, as if he wouldn't even consider an argument to the contrary.

Once again, I got the strange feeling that we were talking circles around each other, that I was missing something.

When it was obvious Edward had nothing else to say on that subject, I exhaled and switched to my other question for the night.

"Why didn't you tell me you were getting Maddie a bracelet for tonight's recital?"

He frowned, as if he hadn't been expecting that one. Then he shrugged.

"It was sort of a last minute decision." His mouth suddenly twitched up, as if something about it amused him.

"I wish you would've told me about it," I admitted.

He sighed and the amused expression disappeared. "I'm sorry. I forgot I need express written consent before I get you or Maddie anything." His voice was formal and cold.

I felt a flame of anger ignite inside of me, but I tried to keep my voice steady when I answered him.

"I didn't say you needed written consent Edward. But I _am_ her mother."

The hardness in his face melted away instantly, leaving behind a mask of pain. He crossed his arms in front of him.

"As opposed to what _I_ am, right? A simple nobody in her life."

"I didn't say that," I insisted.

"You didn't have to. Don't worry. I'll make sure I get your permission next time."

I felt…completely bewildered suddenly. "What's going on here? When did this turn into an argument?"

"When you decided to put up your goddamned walls again," he answered, tight-lipped. He shook his head. "We've spent almost every waking moment together for the past few months, but you're still pushing me away. What do you want from me Bella?"

My heart contracted painfully. I held on to the railing with one hand to balance myself.

I swallowed thickly before answering. "I don't want any more than what you're willing to give Edward." But even as I said the words, I wasn't sure if they were true. Because _I_ wanted it all. And I'd started to work under the impression that maybe he did too.

I looked down at the floor between us. "Maybe…maybe Maddie and I should go home tonight Edward. You're right, we have been together almost every night for the past few weeks, and I understand if you need some space-"

In an instant, he lifted my chin up to his face, his green eyes boring down on me.

"What?"

I put my hands on his arms soothingly. "I know things between us have moved…extremely fast Edward. And if you need some space, some time to sort yourself out-"

"I don't need to sort _anything_ out," he growled. And then abruptly, his expression shifted again, and he looked terrified. He pulled me into his arms and held me so tightly it was almost painful.

"Oh God love, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it that way. I didn't…" He pulled me away from him so he could look in my eyes. "You're right Bella. I am upset tonight. Today has been…" He exhaled tiredly and shook his head. "But it's been all me Bella. _All me._ Please don't ever think I need any space or time away from you or Maddie." He kissed me insistently, desperately. "I'm so sorry Bella. I'm so sorry."

"What's going on Edward?" I asked, feeling a note of franticness in the pit of my stomach.

"It's nothing you need to worry about love. I swear to you, I won't let it be anything you need to worry about."

He pulled me into him again, kissing the top of my head insistently.

"But I need to know-" I began, against his shoulder.

"I know love. I know. You're right. But please…Bella my head's about to explode tonight. Not now. Please, not now." He pulled me away again and gazed at me profoundly.

"Bella, I just need…I need to get us away from here. Away from this city. Away from all this…" – he shook his head – "Once we're at my parents this weekend for Christmas, we'll talk. We'll talk about everything, I _swear_," he insisted. " Just…let's just get away from here first. Please."

And his expression was so anxious, so desperate, that I could do nothing else but nod and hold on to him tightly.

After we made love that night, we clung to each other with more intensity than usual; both of us trying desperately to shut out invisible obstacles neither one of us could put a name to.

OOOOOOOOOO

Even though no photographers or press had been allowed inside Lincoln Center for Alice's Studio's Recital, the inevitable pictures showed up the next day, of my little sugar plum fairy with her little arms bent over her head and her feet pointed out in one of the many positions Alice had taught her. It made me sad, that a moment that should have only belonged to those of us who really loved her, now belonged to the masses. I closed my eyes, closing the paper in front of me over breakfast, and chanting what had become my daily mantra. _'It won't last forever. It won't last forever.'_ Edward shook his head angrily - as upset as I was about the pictures. But he and Rosalie and his brother and Jasper had more important things to focus on that day in the office. I didn't see any of them much that day in the office, except Rosalie for our daily lunch outing.

The next day things felt very different. It was the day before Christmas Eve. The atmosphere felt a lot more relaxed around the office. Word of Lauren's firing had created a stir at first, but with Christmas less than two days away, it got relegated to something to gossip about after the holidays.

Thankfully, Edward seemed less tense too, even excited about the fact that we'd be going up to Long Island the next morning, to spend the Christmas weekend over there with his family. I knew something was still bothering him, but I'd agreed to wait until this weekend for him to tell me whatever it was. And although he still seemed… anxious, this morning he'd seemed more expectant than anything, as if he just couldn't wait for us to be away from here. But there was something else too. Something that had his bright green eyes sparkling with anticipation, and every time the trip to Long Island came up, a huge smile lit up his beautiful face. So I let his excitement rub off on me, and found myself smiling inexplicably at the thought of the coming weekend too. I allowed myself to feel as eager as he seemed to be, as eager as Maddie was for Santa and her Christmas presents. I felt it in my bones; this Christmas weekend would be magical for us, for the three of us. So I looked forward to it in a way I hadn't in a long time.

Alice kept calling me all morning too; reminding me what outfits to take for Maddie and me, to make sure we were ready early so we could avoid traffic as much as possible. She actually had our wardrobe planned for every single day of our stay.

She squealed loudly over the phone during one such phone call. "Bella! I can't wait, I can't wait!"

I could practically feel her vibrating over the phone.

I laughed. "Relax Alice, or you're going to explode before Christmas even gets here, and then that'll be the end of all your wedding planning," I teased.

She giggled. "Ah yes, there will definitely be _a lot_ of wedding planning going on next year." She giggled again and then added, "_This_ is going to be such a special Christmas!"

"And why is that?" I laughed again. There was something in Alice's voice, something that had me bubbling over almost as much as she was.

She was silent for a couple of heartbeats. "Well, because of Rosie and Em's upcoming baby, and Jazz's and my wedding, and of course, because you and Maddie are going to be with us!"

She was right. Those were all special reasons. Although to me, it was the fact that Maddie and I had found such wonderful people - such a wonderful family to spend our holidays with - that made it so special.

After a few more minutes, I had to cut Alice off and hang up. There were still a few things I wanted to finish up in the office before the long holiday weekend. When the phone rang _once again_, a few minutes later, I sighed and shook my head, although I couldn't help smiling at Alice's unbridled enthusiasm.

"Yes Alice?" I answered, with feigned annoyance.

Silence greeted me on the other line.

"Hello?" I said.

Though there was no answer at first, I could clearly hear someone breathing on the other line.

"This is Isabella Swan at the CCW Group," I said, using my professional greeting.

The next words stopped my heart.

"Isabella _Swan_, huh? You know, you could've just kept my last name babe. It always flowed better with Bella than _Swan_ did. Wouldn't you agree, _Bella Forrester?"_

"What do you want Paul?" I asked, not breathing.

"I wanna see you." His voice was as smooth and confident as ever.

"No."

He sighed into the phone. "I see you've made quite the little fucking family for yourself over here."

"I'm hanging-"

"Bells baby, I know where you live," he said quickly. I closed my eyes. "I know where you work too. Don't make me show up at either one of those places, 'cause I've got a gut feeling you wouldn't want your little boyfriend and me to meet, now would you?"

All I could think of then was Edward's fierce temper. His extreme protectiveness. Maddie asking about monkeys and what to call daddies. _Who_ to call daddy. It was funny how all of a sudden it was so clear that _that's_ what she'd been asking.

And the goddamned media.

And Edward.

And Maddie.

I had to protect them.

"Where?" I breathed, swallowing thickly.

Paul chuckled. "That's my girl."

* * *

**A/N: I think we all knew that was coming in one form or another.**

**I know there has to be lots of questions about why Edward is acting the way he is. If you haven't figured it out, I promise they'll all be answered soon. But we need one more chapter from BPOV first. I know that seems like a lot from BPOV. But both this and the previous chapter were shorter than usual.**

**Two more updates next week. Same days. See you then.**

**Reviews are as yummy as a frozen hot chocolate from Serendipity 3. Who's been there?**


	32. Chapter 31 Ultimatum

**A/N: A couple of things...**

**Some of you seemed surprised that Edward would keep the whole Paul thing from Bella, or that Bella would go meet Paul. Upset, I can understand. But surprised…I mean, although this is an All-Human story, I've tried to keep the main character's personalities as close to canon as possible, and I seem to recall both Edward and Bella from the Twilight books keeping things from each other to 'protect' one another. Yes, it was stupid. Yes, they would've been better off being completely honest. But they did it. I'm not saying this E and B are making smart decisions here, but I do think it's keeping in character to their personalities in this story, as well as in the Twilight Series. **

**To those of you who'll stick around for these last few chapters, I promise I'll try to make it worth it. To those who feel they can't, no hard feelings and happy reading. But I've got to tell this story the way it comes to me, otherwise I won't be being true to it, or to myself. Besides, I've always believed that you need some clouds to appreciate the sunshine :)**

**All characters (except my Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a little while longer…**

* * *

**Chapter 31 – Ultimatums**

**Chapter Song Rec: _I Will Survive_ by Gloria Gaynor**

**BPOV**

Funny how, in the past four months that I'd been working around Columbus Circle, with the numerous times I'd walked down fifty-seventh street during lunch, I'd never actually noticed the diner a few feet ahead of me. Never once had I spotted its faded blue awning, darkened with age, ripped and torn so badly it was almost impossible to read the name of the establishment on it. Nor had I noticed the dirty, grimy windows streaked with brown and yellow stains running down and across, like splattered mustard or barbecue sauce. As I stood in front of the old, dilapidating building, drawing in a deep, calming breath, I wondered that it even stood here, among all the splendor of midtown, so out of place; as if it had just been forgotten here, left behind for those who for one reason or another, wanted or needed to hide from the world.

A very fitting place, I supposed, for whom I was meeting now; dark, sleazy; shady.

My hand shook as I pulled open the door, the putrid stench of food frying in old oil attacking my nostrils as soon as I entered. It made my already anxious stomach churn.

There were little more than a handful of people in here, and not one looked up with so much as a curious glance when the little bells chimed as I entered. For that, I was grateful. I made my way to the very back, where he'd said he'd be, once more grateful that at least he'd picked what was probably the only place in the area not crowded with busy holiday tourists taking a break from last-minute sightseeing and shopping. The scattered bunch of tired-looking people all kept their heads down as I passed, lost in dark coffees or wrinkled morning papers.

And then he was there, sitting at the very last booth towards the back, away from the windows, away from most other tables. He was sitting sideways, leaning back comfortably against the booth, one arm draped lazily over the top of the bench. His brawny frame made the plastic table look cartoonishly small. His dark hair, which had always been his pride and joy, had grown long again, and he wore it to his shoulders, letting it frame his sharp face. A wide grin erupted on his face when he caught me approaching; a grin that hadn't changed much since last time I'd seen him - smug, cunning, calculating. He looked at me through scrutinizing black eyes, older than I remembered them, but as confident as always. My heart raced wildly in my chest, but not for the same reasons it used to.

In that same instant, so suddenly that I almost gasped out loud, my heart ached for Edward next to me.

But as I sat down across from my ex-husband, I kept my face blank, interlacing my fingers over the table to keep my shaky hands from betraying me.

Paul studied me, his white teeth gleaming brightly between his lips. Sitting across from him here, it was easier to see the circles under his eyes; almost as dark as his pupils, the unhealthy palor of his naturally-dark face, the hollowed gauntness of his cheeks. From what Jay Jenks had told me a few months ago, Paul had been living hard for the past few years. It was beginning to show.

He snorted. "Bells baby, you look good."

"What do you want Paul?"

"Shit, can we exchange some pleasantries first?" he chuckled, shifting in his seat. "It's not every day a man bumps into his long lost wife."

"I'd hardly call this bumping into each other. And let's get one thing straight," I added through gritted teeth, "I. Am not. Your_ wife._"

He laughed.

"I don't know about that. I seem to recall somethin' 'bout 'til death do us part and shit in those vows we took."

"Lots of things in those vows we took didn't exactly pan out."

He snorted and lifted his brows, surprised by my answer.

The waitress appeared then, a middle-aged woman who looked as unhappy to be there as I felt. Paul slid a greasy menu my way, the laminate over it yellow with age. I ignored it and asked for a cup of black coffee, feeling Paul's eyes on me.

"What do you want Paul?" I asked again, once the waitress left.

He sighed deeply, his eyes taking me in from the top of my head, sliding down my face, past my neck, down my chest, before coming back up to meet mine.

His gaze made my skin crawl.

"Take your coat off. Get comfortable."

"I'm about as comfortable as I'm going to be."

He snorted and smiled. "Time's been good to you Bella. I mean, not that you weren't a cute little thing before, but" – he gave me the slow grin that, in another life, one that now seemed to have belonged to someone else, used to melt my insides – "shit, you're all woman now." His tongue shot out and he ran it against his top lip.

The twisted compliment combined with the salacious look left me feeling dirty. I looked away to compose myself. Out of my periphery, I saw Paul angle his body forward in his side of the booth and lower his arm to the seat next to him, while the other hand tapped along to the beat of the muffled Christmas song playing in the background.

"I'd…been hoping to see you when you went back to Forks a couple of months ago, for the custody hearing but…you brought that bulldog of a counselor with you, and well" - he tapped the table twice with his big palm - "that kinda put a damper on my plans."

"Your plans," I hissed, glaring at him. "What _were_ your plans? To fight me for custody of Maddie even though you haven't seen her since she was a baby? Even though you have no idea who she is, or what she's like?" My voice shook with equal parts anger and anxiety. "Is that what you want-"

He chuckled again, putting his palm up to me. "Chill Bells. Believe me, I have no plans to try n' take the kid away from you."

A wave of relief washed over me, because that _had_ been my fear.

Once again, Edward came to my mind, the ache and need for him so strong, so palpable I could taste it. I felt so foolish suddenly for having gotten upset that he'd bought Maddie a bracelet a couple of days ago without telling me. It was what people did for those they loved.

And Edward loved Maddie. She wasn't 'the kid' to him. She was his princess. He loved her the way _this_ man never would. He loved her as if she were…

…as if she were _his_ daughter.

"So what _did_ you want?" I asked, unconsciously leaning across the table. The sooner I got an answer to that question, the sooner I could get back to Edward.

Paul took the way that I leaned into the table as some sort of sign. He leaned in sharply, bringing his face just a couple of inches from mine, and wrapped one big hand over both of my own. His black eyes drank me in.

"Do you really need to ask me that Bella?" he breathed, in a tone I recognized, but no longer cared to hear.

Startled, I quickly pulled back and snatched my hands out from under his, lowering them to either side of me. I rubbed my palms off on my coat, trying to get rid of the stifling feel of his cold, clammy hands on mine. I narrowed my eyes at him angrily.

The waitress appeared then, unceremoniously placing the cup of coffee in front of me. A few drops splattered around as she lowered it, the cup and saucer making a loud tinkling sound as it met with the plastic table.

Paul pulled back slowly, and chuckled once the waitress walked away again.

"Don't you remember what I told you that time, Bells? Outside your pop's house?"

I stared at him blankly, ignoring the stale-smelling coffee in front of me. "You told me a lot of things. Ninety-nine percent of which were lies."

He flattened his palms out on the table. "I told you that you belonged with me. That no matter where you went, I'd find a way to bring you back."

"Are you joking me?" I snorted. "Is that what this is?"

He shook his head slowly. "I know I fucked up Bella." But the cocky smile on his lips betrayed his statement. I wondered briefly how I'd failed to notice that so many times before, when we were younger. "I could've been better to you, I admit that," he continued, in a tone that was supposed to be magnetic, but fell far short. "But what can I say?" he snorted, a wry expression on his dark face. "I was young. We all make mistakes when we're young, right?"

My hands shook at my sides, out of disbelief and insult at his weak attempt at an apology, if that's what that could have been called. I decided to ignore it, and ask him something else, instead.

"So you used…_my_ daughter to play some stupid game. The whole custody thing had nothing to do with you wanting to be a part of her life, did it?"

He sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes impatiently. "Look, me and you, we may have had our…problems" - I felt like laughing in his face, because that was the understatement of the year. He leaned across the table again, a dark intensity in his ebony eyes – "but you gotta admit Bells, we had some serious chemistry going on. When we were good, we were _real good_," he smiled suggestively. "I know we can have that again," he said matter-of-factly.

There were so many things I could've said at that moment. I could've pointed out that I'd just asked him a question about Maddie, and he'd completely ignored it, the way he'd always ignored her. I could've told him that our problems were so epic, there was no way to even numerate them. I could've told him that now that I knew what _real good_ really meant, what he and I once had seemed like a sad joke. I could've told him that sitting here with him, across a stained, scratched up table, was making me want to hurl.

But now that I knew this had nothing to do with my daughter, I needed to end this conversation as soon as possible. Because looking across the dirty table at the man who'd been my first boyfriend, my first lover, my introduction to love and relationships, what I needed most was to get back to Edward. To the man who'd changed the distorted image this man had left behind; to the man that had taught me what real love _and respect_ could be.

To the only man I'd ever want _real good_ with.

I shook my head, feeling something akin to pity for the man I once thought I loved.

"Paul, if you think that what we had could have _ever_ been considered _real good_, then you _still_ have no idea what that really means."

That had not been the answer he'd been waiting for. His lips twisted into a snarl.

"Oh, and I suppose you do now, huh?" Paul spat. "What happened? Jakey boy wasn't cutting it anymore? That rich little boyfriend of yours giving it to you better?" He made some sort of gesture, that I couldn't really see, with the hand that lay hidden under the table. But the way his arm jerked back and forth gave me a pretty good idea what it was.

I glared at him.

He snorted. "Yeah, I'm sure he is," he snorted, answering his own question. The smugness in his face was replaced with the darkness, the meanness that always took over when he realized he wasn't getting his way. "You think you've got it _so_ good now, don't you?"

I swallowed thickly, but kept an even expression. "Paul, the only thing you and I have left to discuss is the termination papers. You don't love Maddie, Paul. You never have."

He stared at me blankly, unapologetically. But his lack of a denial didn't hurt as much as it once would've. Maddie had a man a thousand times better than Paul in her life, who did love her.

"Sign the termination papers Paul. Do one good thing for her in your life."

He frowned, but didn't answer.

"Will you sign the papers?"

"For what?" he hissed, leaning across the table again, but this time in a threatening rather than suggestive manner. "So you can marry your rich little fucker and make him your baby daddy? I don't think so sweetheart."

I cringed at the way he spoke about Edward, wanting to scream at him at the top of my lungs. But I knew how Paul worked. He was just trying to press every single one of my buttons until he found the right one; the one that would make me react.

"This isn't about him. It's about Maddie. I'm asking you to do the right thing for _her_."

He glared at me. And then surprisingly, for a split second, I thought I saw something flicker in his eyes. Something like shame, or guilt. But it was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

I'd been sitting here for far too long. Paul hadn't come to discuss Maddie, or the termination papers. So there was nothing left for us to talk about.

I opened up my purse and took out a couple of bills and placed them on the table. Then I moved to the outer edge of the booth and started to get up.

"Your lawyer has the papers Paul. I hope you'll-"

"Where do you think you're going?" he snapped.

"I'm leaving. If you won't sign the termination papers, you and I have nothing left to discuss."

His eyes flashed quickly to some point just behind me, before returning to mine quickly. "I tried Bella. All you had to do was come back with me."

I frowned, but I wouldn't let the threat in his voice stop me. As soon as I got back to the office, I'd tell Edward. He'd be angry; upset at me for having met Paul on my own; I knew him well enough to be sure of that. But Edward loved me. That knowledge, in the face of this man who had no idea what the word meant, warmed me inside like it never had before. Together, Edward and I would deal with Paul.

"Good-bye Paul."

He closed his eyes and shook his head, muttering something under his breath.

When I turned to leave, I came face to face with Tanya.

The surprise made me gasp aloud.

"Bella dahling." She smiled coolly. "Mind if I join you?"

For the space of three seconds, I was deeply confused. I wondered how Tanya had ended up in here, in this old, seedy, dirty little diner. A place I would've never pictured someone like her frequenting in a thousand years. I wondered why she was smiling at me, after our last encounter had been anything but friendly. And I wondered why she would want to sit with me.

Until I turned around and caught the look on Paul's face.

They had been almost imperceptible before, mixed like they were with resentment and scorn. But they _had_ definitely been there.

Guilt and Shame.

Sentiments I hadn't recognized in his features; never having seen them there before.

_'I tried Bella. All you had to do was come back with me.'_

I turned back to Tanya, unable to disguise my disgust.

"I'm leaving," I said decisively, and made to move past her.

"Stay Bella," she said easily, grabbing my forearm. "For Edward's sake, if not for your daughter's and your own."

Maddie.

Edward.

Just like that, I _couldn't_ move. At least not until I knew what she meant.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I hissed, breathing hard now.

"Calm down Bella," she said. "I'm just trying to help. Seems like our Eddie has gotten himself into all sorts of trouble lately. Sit down and we can chat about it, see if between the both of us we can figure out a way to get him out."

I pulled my arm out of her grip and glared at her. Her face was blank, except for the cool smile plastered on her botoxed lips. But she'd said Edward was in trouble, and instinctively, I knew that she somehow knew exactly what had been bothering Edward for the past few days.

My mind reeling and my body physically shaking now, I sat back down.

Tanya lowered herself on to the booth next to Paul. He glared at me accusingly, while she smiled as if we were old friends meeting for lunch. She picked up the dirty menu carefully, between her thumb and forefinger.

"So what do you recommend here Bella?" she asked with an amused grin.

_The hot, black coffee in your face._

"Cut the small talk Tanya, and tell me what you meant by trying to help Edward."

"Direct isn't she?" she snorted in Paul's direction.

He didn't answer her, instead he hung his head and laced his fingers together over the table. I couldn't even begin to imagine how they'd come to know each other.

"Alright Bella," she shrugged. "We'll get right to it."

She put one of her hands over Paul's hands, looking at him, though he kept his head down. "Your husband here-"

I cut her off sharply. "He is _not_ my husband."

She continued as if she hadn't heard me, "-and I have had lots of interesting conversations about you. Lot's of history between you two, isn't there?" she chuckled.

I didn't answer her, too busy trying to control my breathing, which had become erratic.

She smiled again. "Anyway, me being the die-hard romantic I am, I realized he still had…feelings for his wife-"

"_I. Am not. His wife,"_ I said through clenched teeth.

She waved her hand as if she were waving off a fly. "Semantics dahling. Tomayto, Tomahto. Wife, Ex-wife. All the same thing. Anyway, I suggested that if he still felt so strongly about you, he should talk to you. Maybe you felt the same, I don't know," she shrugged, "I mean, he's a pretty good looking guy." She ran her long nails through his dark hair.

Paul didn't look up. Tanya smiled tauntingly at me, as if waiting for some sort of reaction. When she failed to get one, she shrugged.

"You've become a difficult girl to get alone lately though Bella. Jeez, does Edward ever leave your side? Must get" – she shuddered – "stifling."

"It's not stifling when you really care about the other person," I said.

"Again, semantics," she said. "We all have different ways of showing how much we care, don't we Paul?" she asked, looking over at him. But he still refused to look up or answer. She sighed and turned back to me.

"But I suppose with you being the center of attention lately, poor Eddie's had to keep you close to make sure you don't embarrass him."

"Embarrass him?" I blurted.

She chuckled. "Well sure. What with your sordid past and all. Fucking two brothers at the same time while you were married to one of them and employed by the other. Not knowing which one is your baby daddy." She shook her head and sucked her teeth, smiling as if the situation shocked her. "You gotta admit, it's the sort of story the media would go crazy for, especially when it involves America's new sweetheart."

I shook my head incredulously, glaring between Paul and Tanya. "It's not true. None of that's true."

"And once again Bella, semantics. If that sort of information got leaked out, it wouldn't matter two shits whether it was true or not, and you know that. The media doesn't care how true it is, just how much the story will sell. And believe you me, it would sell."

I glared at her, absolutely speechless.

She continued. "I mean, I'm sure you and Edward would be able to deal with the negative publicity." She leaned in closely, as if she were sharing a secret with me. "But…how about dear old dad back in your little hometown? Or your big, hunky mechanic friend. Or," – she raised her eyebrows – "how about little Maddie-"

"Don't you dare say her name!" I growled, slamming a fist against the table. The lone coffee cup rattled and spilled out half of its contents over the saucer and on the table. Tanya pulled back, and Paul finally looked up. I glanced around me. A couple of people in the diner had looked up, but quickly returned to their own dramas.

Tanya smiled again. "Your daughter," she continued instead. "Imagine the whole city, the whole country knowing she's a-" – she seemed to consider her words more carefully – "knowing her paternity is unknown."

"Her paternity is _not_ unknown!" I hissed desperately, and turned my eyes to Paul. "Paul, that is all a lie! You _know_ that's all a lie. You've always known she's yours! You only ever passed her off as Jake's to ease your guilty conscience for being a man incapable of caring about _anyone_ but yourself!"

He glared at me, but refused to answer.

"Goddamn you Paul! That's your brother she's talking about! Your _daughter_! Are you really going to let her spread lies about them-"

"Relax Bella," Tanya said quietly, leaning into me across the table again and glancing around the diner. "You're going to call attention to us." I was too far gone to either fathom or consider why she would even care about that. "Besides, neither your _ex_-husband nor I have any intention of spreading any of that information around. You misunderstand me," she said, in what was supposed to be a soothing tone. "I'm here to help you Bella dahling. Both you _and_ Edward. I thought I told you that."

I leaned back again, feeling as if my heart were about to race out of my chest. I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry.

I wanted to grab Tanya by her strawberry blonde curls and bang her head against the condiment-stained window.

"Help how?" I asked, hating the way my voice shook.

Tanya sat back again and studied me thoughtfully. She took a deep breath. "Bella, I can help you make all that ugliness disappear. I can help you pretend that that part of your life never happened." She turned her eyes to Paul. "I can assure you that all the sordidness surrounding you and your ex-husband will _never_ become a public embarrassment for you or Edward, and…I can assure you that Paul here will sign those termination papers you're so desperate for."

I gasped aloud, my eyes growing wide.

"What did you _do_?" I asked Paul, my voice thick with incredulity. Again, I thought I saw the slightest hint of shame cross his features before he composed his expression into the cold, hard scowl he gave me. "You'd _sell_ her Paul? You'd sell away your rights to her? I never thought even you would sink that low."

He didn't answer me.

Suddenly, I couldn't take it anymore. The anger; the disgust at the two people sitting before me. I narrowed my eyes at Tanya.

"And you? I have no idea what game you think you're playing now Tanya, but I'm not going to sit here and make any deals with you, not for you to keep whatever fucking secrets you think you have on me, and not to buy my daughter's freedom from a man who _never_ deserved to be called her father." I glared between both of them, him glaring back at me coldly, and her smiling dryly. "I've dealt with rumors and innuendos before, both here and back home, and I'll deal with them again if I have to. Now I'm going to get up and leave, and I don't ever want to see either of your-"

"Hold on Bella, we're not done," Tanya said coolly.

"Yes, we are," I hissed roughly, half-standing.

Tanya offhandedly flung a yellow manila letter-size envelope on the table.

"I told you I was here to help both you _and Edward_."

When she saw me hesitating, poised between sitting and standing, she added in a calm voice,

"Look at it Bella. Just take a look." She put one hand up, palm out, and the other against her chest. "I swear to you, if after looking at it, you still want to leave, I won't try to stop you. I will never contact you, or Edward, or anyone around you again. But if you really love Edward, if you really want what's best for him, you'll take a look at what's in there."

Just look at it. That's all I had to do. And she'd leave us alone. I looked at Paul, but his face was a blank emotionless mask, betraying nothing. He extended his arms and started playing with the black and white salt and pepper shakers up against the wall.

Slowly, with my heart pounding painfully against my chest, I reached for the manila envelope. It shook slightly in my hands as I pulled up the flap and reached inside, pulling out a small stack of white sheets stapled together on the upper left hand corner.

At first, I thought I was looking at the court papers Paul had filed a few months ago, for custody of Maddie. But then I read the first line, 'New York County,' and for a split second, I thought Tanya was showing me the termination papers she'd offered to have Paul sign. I was about to fling them back in her face, until I skimmed the rest of it.

**Superior Court of the State of New York, County of New York**

**Plaintiff/Petitioner: Lauren Ann Mallory**

**v.**

**Defendant/Respondent One: Edward Anthony Cullen**

**Defendant/Respondent Two: Rosalie Hannah Hale-Cullen**

**Civil Action Number 5434510**

**Complaint:**

**Comes Now the Plaintiff, Lauren Ann Mallory, by and through her attorney of record, David J. Tatum, and files this complaint. As grounds for the relief requested, the plaintiff states as follows:**

**The jurisdiction of this court is invoked to secure protection of and redress deprivation of rights secured by 42 U.S.C. Section 2000e et seq. providing for injunctive and other relief against sex discrimination, sexual harassment and retaliation…**

A small cry of horror escaped from my lips.

I examined the papers carefully, tears burning painfully behind my eyelids and blurring my vision.

Tanya's voice rose in the background, as if from some nightmare I no longer had any control over.

"Go ahead Bella, look through the documents carefully. You'll see that they're one hundred percent legitimate. I'll summarize them for you. Lauren claims that Edward first approached her inappropriately early last summer. He was…quite insistent, as you'll read; inviting her for private lunches up in his office, insinuating accounts and promotions she'd receive if she accepted his advances. He'd ask her to meet him for conferences and then when she'd show up, there would be no one there but himself. During one particular conference" – Tanya made air quotes around the word – "Edward refused to keep his hands to himself, and Lauren claims that Rosalie clearly saw them coming out of the conference room, and that it was obvious that Lauren was distressed, and why. Yet she chose to ignore her brother-in-law's inexcusable behavior."

She paused while I turned the documents over wildly, reading page after page of misrepresentations and outright lies. My lungs knotted tightly, making it hard for me to breathe.

"Then you came along," Tanya continued in a clinical voice. "Edward grew tired of pursuing Lauren and turned to you. Suddenly, _you_ became the agency's golden child, and Lauren, who'd continually refused Edward, had all her major responsibilities and accounts taken from her and handed to you."

I whipped my head up angrily. "That's not true, that's not how any of it happened! _She_ was the one pursuing _him!_ I saw it myself plenty of times. And that day outside the conference room, she was only distressed at having been interrupted!"

I thought back to that morning, the first time I met Edward, and the horrible impression I'd gotten of him once I'd realized he'd been fooling around with Lauren in the conference room. But even then, even with all of that, it had still been obvious to me that Lauren had been upset that Maddie had interrupted them, not because of anything Edward had done to her.

"Lauren and Edward were…fooling around, yes," I continued, flinching as I said the words, "but it was _she_ that kept pursuing _him. _And Rosalie did nothing because nothing ever happened again after that incident outside the conference room! I'll testify if I have to-"

She gave a loud snort. "Do you really think anyone would take your testimony seriously Bella? You're his girlfriend for God's sakes, and the one person who's benefited the most from Lauren's misfortunate treatment. Besides," she laughed sarcastically, "once the public finds out that you make it a habit to screw around with your bosses, nothing you say will hold any weight. You'll be more of a liability than an asset to Edward's case."

My throat constricted tightly. I couldn't answer her. I couldn't refute her statement, even though everything she was saying was wrong; horribly, venomously wrong.

But she was right about one thing; the most important one; that that was how everyone would see it.

"None of that's true," I said in a strangled whisper, looking in her cold, cruel, eyes. "You _know_ that's not true. Edward would _never_ do these things." I held on to the documents so tightly that they started to crumple in my hands.

"Maybe the Edward you think you know wouldn't," she said matter-of-factly. "But the Edward _I_ knew, he'd do that and much more." She snorted when one rogue tear fell down my cheek.

I shook my head vehemently. "No! Edward would _never_ do any of this. Not the Edward he was then, and not the Edward he is now. And Rose…" – What little air I had left in my lungs quickly evaporated as I thought of Rose. I brought one arm down and around my waist, trying to hold myself together.

Rose was pregnant. She couldn't go through this now.

Tanya studied me quietly for a few seconds, and then shook her head. "The point is Bella, it doesn't matter what you or I believe. What matters is what Lauren will claim, what the public at large will believe if these papers get filed."

"You mean they haven't been filed yet?" I asked desperately.

She stared at me steadily, and then shook her head from side to side.

I closed my eyes and exhaled heavily.

"You realize then Bella, the implications of this lawsuit," Tanya said carefully. "This is much more than just the drama associated with a small town girl screwing around with a couple of podunk hillbillies. No offense dahling," she said, glancing quickly at Paul. He snorted and kept his eyes on the salt and pepper shakers. "Don't take this personally," she said to me then, "but you Bella, are a nobody. Your indiscretions become public and they'll be forgotten within the week. Whereas Edward…" – she sighed dramatically – "this _will_ destroy him and his family's name. Whether Lauren wins or loses makes no difference at all. Once this lawsuit gets filed, the agency will lose all credibility. Every major client will pull their accounts faster than you can say pariah. Edward and Rosalie will most likely be forced to step down, but it won't do any good. The Cullens _are_ the agency, after all. CCW _will_ fail."

Huge tears streamed down my face.

Tanya inhaled deeply, shrugging. "The thing is Bella, even with all of Edward's philandering and fooling around all these years, no one ever doubted his integrity as a businessman. But with this…he'll be known as nothing more than another guy that put pleasure before business. And while Rosalie's part in this may be forgotten in a few years – all she did after all was turn the other way – no self-respecting business will ever look in Edward's direction again. He will never again be anything more than just another rich, spoiled, sleazebag. Of course, it's not like Edward needs the work but…we both know what that agency means to him."

I buried my face between my hands.

It all made sense now. Why Edward had been so distraught since the day of Lauren's firing. He was going to lose everything. Both he and Rose. And the truth was, once this lawsuit became public, they'd _all_ lose. The entire Cullen family.

"These papers don't have to be filed Bella."

I looked up at Tanya quickly. In my misery, I'd almost forgotten that she and Paul were even there.

The first thing to hit me was the strange gleam in her eyes. She didn't look the least bit upset. On the contrary, the look in her eyes was elated; triumphant. A cold chill ran through my veins.

"How…how do you know about this?" I asked. "How do you have these papers?"

"That doesn't matter right now Bella," she smiled. "What matters is that I can help. You and I can work together to make sure these papers never see the light of day."

And as much as I hated it, as much as I already knew it would cost me more than I could imagine, I _had_ to ask.

"How?"

Her smile widened. She placed her elbows over the table and interlaced her fingers under her chin.

"You know how."

I felt as if the room were spinning.

"Why?" I breathed weakly. "You don't love him Tanya. I know you don't."

Tanya sighed impatiently. "Dahling, your problem is that you think everything revolves around love. But Bella, love does not last," she said intently, as if we were old girlfriends and she was trying to give me a piece of sage advice. "This has nothing to do with whether I love Edward or not. I _know_ Edward better than you ever will. I told you," she said insistently, as if she were upset at me for being so hard-headed, "that day in the lobby. I told you Edward and I have played this game for a long time now. Someone new catches his eye, we break up, he starts fucking around with her, gets bored, and comes back to me."

I narrowed my eyes and shook my head.

She rolled her eyes and huffed childishly. "Fine. I admit this time he's taken the game a little further than usual. And while in the past I've usually waited for him to grow bored of his fling on his own, frankly I've grown tired. I'm doing you a favor here Isabella. I'm giving you the chance to end things on your own terms, before he leaves you unceremoniously, in front of the entire country. I'm doing him a favor too. You see, I know exactly what Lauren really wants. Just like I knew exactly what your ex-husband here would want." I looked at Paul. His grip around the condiment shakers tightened, a crease formed over his brow. But he said nothing.

"And just like I know that there is nothing more important to Edward than his agency and his integrity," Tanya finished.

I shook my head. "No, you're wrong." I leaned across the table angrily. "Edward loves me. He would never-"

She leaned over the table also, and cut me off. "You're right Bella. If Edward had to choose right now, between you or his agency, he would definitely pick you. If you went back to the office right now and told him all about this, he'd tell you that as long as he has you, that's all he needs. And he'd mean it too." She moved back and smiled spitefully.

"But how about…a year…two years down the line, when he's lost the agency? When they've _all_ lost the agency? Because mark my words, it will not survive this scandal," she said in a sure voice. "How about when he's the laughing stock of the advertising world? And how about Rosalie? It's no secret how dedicated she is to that agency. What do you think this will do to her in her state? How do you think she'll feel when the agency collapses? And Emmett, and Jasper, when they have to watch everything they've worked for over the past few years crumble? And your little buddy Alice, if she ever finds out her fiancee and her brother lost everything because of you? Because you were too selfish to do the right thing? He _will_ pick you now Bella. But he'll hate you in a couple of years, when he realizes not only he, but his family lost everything because of _you_."

I stared at her, pain radiating through every crevice in my body.

"Or…" she said lightly, "you can stay with him and keep this meeting a secret. He and his family will still lose everything, but at least he won't blame you for it. I can assure you, your ex-husband and I would keep your secret."

"Or…" she raised an eyebrow, "you can do the right thing."

The right thing. The right thing. I couldn't think straight anymore. I knew now what Edward had meant the other night, out on his terrace. I felt as if my head were about to explode.

"I…" my voice sounded rough and hoarse. "Even if…Edward knows how much I love him." I heard Paul snort in the background. "He won't let me…he would never let me leave."

Tanya inhaled deeply, looking at me as if I were a child she was having a hard time getting through to.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," she shook her head. "Don't you know Edward at all?" She snorted and rolled her eyes. "As long as Edward believes you love him, you're right, he won't let you go. But Edward is, above everything else, a gentleman. He won't make you stay with him if he thinks you don't want him anymore."

"I could never convince him I don't want him!" I cried. "He would never buy that!"

She raised her brows. "Bella dahling, you're in advertising. You're up for an award for the love of God," she chuckled. "Sell it."

Her laughter was like a thousand nails being scraped down an old, corroded chalkboard. I marveled at her ability to find humor in any of this.

"How would I even know…what assurance would I even have that Lauren would never file these papers? That no one would ever find out about this?" I spat angrily.

She chuckled again. "I don't need to give you assurances dahling. If this ever gets out, you can simply come back, that's all," she shrugged. "As long as you keep your part of the bargain, and keep yourself and your daughter away, I'll keep mine, and vice versa. We will be each other's assurances."

"My daughter?" I whispered suddenly. "You'd want me to keep Maddie away from Edward?" I asked incredulously. Again, my eyes strayed to Paul, quiet and useless in the corner. He didn't even flinch. I shook my head vehemently. "No," I said definitively. "No, I _can't_ do that."

She sighed heavily. "It would be all or nothing Bella."

"You don't understand," I hissed. "Edward would _never_ go for that. He would never accept-"

"Oh for God's sakes Bella!" Tanya threw up her hands in exasperation. "You're the child's mother, aren't you? You make all decisions regarding who gets to be a part of her life and who doesn't! Edward has no say in that!"

I felt as if a ragged-edged dagger were being slowly dragged through my insides.

"Please," I begged, "She loves him. They mean everything to each other."

Tanya shook her head stoically. "How long do you think it would take you to end up back in his bed if she remained a part of his life?"

Hot, blinding tears streamed down my face unapologetically, burning me.

I turned angry, blameful eyes on Paul. "How could you be a part of this? It wasn't enough that you _never_ gave her anything, emotionally or otherwise, you have to _take_ from her too?"

He leaned in across the table, black eyes scorching. "I had _nothing_ to do with this! I didn't even know about any of this," he hissed defensively. "Maybe if your little boyfriend knew how to keep his dick in his pants-"

I slammed a fisted hand against the table – _hard;_ pain radiated up my arm. Tanya jumped slightly in her seat and Paul jerked his head back in surprise.

"Don't you ever, _ever_ say anything like that about him again!" I growled lowly, my voice shaking with fury. "You know _nothing_ about him. He is more of a man, more _decent_," I choked, "than you can _ever_ hope to be."

He scowled at me. "Whatever. But don't blame me for this-"

"But it was you that called me!" I accused him. "If you wouldn't have called me I would've never…I should've never…" I hung my head and started crying.

Edward. I needed Edward.

His assurance the other night that he'd be there to take care of me whenever he could rang through my head. I should've let him be there for me when Paul called.

But then…there may not have been any way to stop the lawsuit from being filed.

"Come on Bella," Tanya cooed in a sickenly sweet voice. "It's not that bad. Just take a couple of days and think about it. You'll realize that what I'm telling you is true. I'm merely giving you an opportunity to get out of a situation that would've ended anyway, with your head held high. And in the process, Edward keeps his business and his family keeps their integrity, and you get those termination papers signed-"

I whipped my head back up, glowering furiously between Paul and Tanya. "I don't want _any_ goddamned termination papers signed like this! My daughter is not an item to be bought or sold," I gritted.

Paul turned anxious eyes towards Tanya. She looked at him and put her hand up, palm out.

"Very well," she said, turning back to me. "That part is up to you. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, so we won't be doing anything then. But you need to let me know before Monday what you've decided, otherwise these papers will be filed in court first thing in the morning."

With that, she snatched the papers out of my hand, stuck them back in the manila envelope, and left.

**A/N: EPOV in a couple of days. I know we need it at this point.**

**Reviews, to let me know what you're thinking, are always appreciated (even if you're angry).**


	33. Ch 32 You Can Run, You Can Hide

**Ch. 32 – You Can Run, You Can Hide…**

**Chapter Song Rec: **_**Somewhere Only We Know**_** by Keane. (This song kept running through my head as I wrote this chapter. Go listen to it.)**

**The format of this chapter is a bit different from the rest of the chapters of this story, by necessity. It's important to tell what was going on with Edward on the day of Maddie's recital. BUT, I do not like doing alternating POVs of the same chapter. (Though I would give my left pinky for S. Meyer to FINALLY finish Midnight Sun). So though I am retelling pieces of this day from E's POV, I am NOT redoing scenes I already did from B's POV. Hope this makes sense as you read on.**

**Lots of strong reactions to the previous chapter. I read all your reviews and appreciate them all, even the ones that pretty much hate me and Bella right now. I get it. I really do. But…(deep sigh)…all I can say guys, is trust me. If you're still here, then hopefully that means you do. But like I said, I've got to tell this the way it comes to me, otherwise what's the point? I haven't had a chance to get back to you guys on the reviews, but I'm sure you'd rather I keep rolling out these chapters :)**

**One of my lovely readers, OLI21 (she goes by missoli22 over at twilighted dot net) has started a topic for this story over at twilighted dot net! You can access it by typing the following (Remember, no spaces and replace the words backslash and dot, etc., with the actual characters): twilighted dot net backslash forum backslash viewtopic dot php question mark f=44&t=15721**

**If you have trouble with that, just go to twilighted dot net forums, then go to fanfiction, then Alternate Universe All Humans, and Search for the title of this story. She also created a beautiful banner for the story. So now I have two wonderful banners, one there and one on my profile on this website, created by another lovely reader, Elliania. Make sure you check them both out.**

**Head on over to the forum if you want to discuss just about anything about this story, speculate, vent, etc. I'll meet you there as much as possible.**

**Just want to mention, the last few chapters of this story have not been betad, so I apologize for any and all grammatical and other errors.**

**All characters, except Maddie, belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a **_**little**_** longer…**

* * *

**EPOV**

**The Morning of Maddie's Recital, a few days before Christmas:**

"Mr. Cullen, is there anything else I can get you?" the saleslady asked as I waited, leaning up against the large, floor-to-ceiling windows with my arms crossed against my chest. She'd already brought me a sandwich and a couple of bottles of water, though they all sat untouched on the small wooden table they'd provided, complete with their signature baby blue tablecloth and fine silver utensils carefully folded inside a pristine white cloth napkin.

"I'm fine Millie," I answered with a smile, "Thank you."

She nodded, and frowned slightly before walking away. Millie, Marley, Molly? Had I gotten her name wrong? I was pretty sure I had, though I was too nervous, too anxious to really care one way or another.

The elevator dinged, signaling it was stopping on this floor. I exhaled impatiently and straightened myself up. Hopefully, it was finally her. I mean Jesus, how long did it take to catch a cab to Tiffany's from downtown Brooklyn after rush hour? I'd been waiting almost an hour now.

My pulse raced a mile a minute as I watched Alice stride out of the elevator, wrapped in a black velvet coat and tall black boots that added about twenty inches to her tiny frame. Still, she strutted easily and confidently across the floor, heels clicking noisily against the restored wood as she went.

Alice's huge eyes grew even bigger as she glanced quickly from side to side, taking in display after display of jewelry. A small, undeniable smile spread across her face, and I could practically hear her thoughts; how perfectly each piece up here would go with one or another outfit of hers. I smirked to myself.

When she finally tore her eyes away from the sparkly items long enough to look at me, she smirked and stepped up her pace. I waited for her, stock still, my heart hammering in my chest.

"Alright Edward," she said by way of greeting, stopping in front of me with her arms folded against her chest. "What the hell was so important that you needed me to get my ass over here to Tiffany's at this time of morning, when you know how busy I'm going to be today?" she whined. "I still have last minute costumes to pick up from the seamstress, my Clara is having a nervous breakdown, and the Nutcracker Prince had a huge fight with the Rat King last night and is threatening to- Why are you smiling that way?" she asked suspiciously.

I put my hands on her tiny shoulders, hoping she couldn't feel the way they trembled. Fuck. Who would've ever thought that I, Edward Cullen, would feel so nervous about showing this tiny four foot ten munchkin anything? But I was. And I could only imagine how much more terrified I would be once I had to really do this.

But it was just nervous anticipation that had me shaking this way. I had no doubts about what I was doing; or planning on doing.

"I…I needed your help little sis." I smiled at her crookedly.

She frowned. "Yes, yes, you said that over the phone. My help with what exactly?" Her eyes narrowed, eyes sparkling expectantly. "Are you buying me something here for Christmas?"

I smirked. "I wasn't planning to, but I suppose you can pick something out for yourself once we're done." She clapped excitedly before frowning suspiciously again.

"So who _are_ you here for? Mom? Bella? I would've thought you would've learned your lesson about picking up expensive jewelry for Bella by now. She _still_ hyperventilates every time we mention that sapphire necklace," she said in an exasperated tone. Then she looked away thoughtfully. "Which by the way, I was thinking of borrowing from her for tonight." She looked back up at me. "You wouldn't mind, would you?"

I pursed my lips and shrugged. "It's Bella's. If she wants to lend it to you, that's up to her."

She clapped and bounced up and down again.

I sighed and squeezed her shoulders. "Actually…I came here this morning for Maddie."

Alice grinned widely. "I thought you were going to give her that trip to DisneyWorld in the Spring for Christmas, and that lifesize Princess Belle doll to hold her off until then?"

I shrugged. "I am. But I decided to get her something else. I've seen the way she admires her mom's earrings, and even your rings and stuff. She likes sparkly things." I smiled wistfully, picturing Maddie playing dress up. She was such a little princess.

"Yes, she does," Alice snorted. "She definitely didn't get that from her mother." As soon as she said that, Alice's face fell. "I mean, Edward, I didn't mean-"

I let go of one of her shoulders and waved her off with my hand.

Alice's slips of the tongue were the least of my concerns these days. And the last person I wanted to think of right now was the one she'd unwittingly just referred to. For now, I wanted, I _needed_ to be focused on _this_. I'd think of my problems with Bella's ex-husband later.

"Forget about it," I said quickly. "Come on." I took her by the arm and walked her over to where the saleslady had left the two very different pieces of jewelry I'd been looking at. The saleslady quickly walked up to us when she saw us approaching the display.

"Ready Mr. Cullen?" she asked.

"Yes, thank you," I answered, leaving her name out this time.

She nodded once and moved behind the display case, bending down to the cabinets in the back and sliding one open to pull out what she'd been holding for me. I explained the situation to Alice while the saleslady pulled out my items.

"I called Tiffany's this morning and set up a private appointment because, like I said, I wanted to get something sparkly for Maddie. The saleslady met me up here," I said, nodding towards her, "and helped me go over a few pieces for little girls. During one of her trips back downstairs, she happened to bring up another item…"

The saleslady turned around then, and placed the two items, resting on a signature sky blue velvet pad, in front of Alice and me.

"Please give us a few minutes," I asked Millie/Marley/Molly.

"Of course Mr. Cullen. Please let me know when you're ready," she replied, before walking away.

One of the requirements of being a personal shopping assistant in stores such as Tiffany, or Barney's, or Saks, was to be discreet, above all, regarding the purchases of their clientele. So I wasn't particularly concerned that Millie/Marley/Molly would reveal my purchases or my conversation to the media. I just wanted privacy for what I was about to tell my sister.

Alice's eyes widened the way they only ever did when she was looking at jewelry.

"Wow, Edward. That is one beautiful ring. Simple, but _so_ classically elegant."

It was. A five carat cushion-shaped rare blue diamond, surrounded by a halo of small white diamonds, all set in a simple platinum band.

"But that's kind of grown up for Maddie, don't you think? I mean sure, you can buy it for as an heirloom, to wear when she gets older, but for right now I would think something with dolphins or mermaids would suit-" She looked up at me.

"That's not for Maddie."

"But I thought you said…" She blinked twice; slowly. I could practically see the wheels turning in her head even as she spoke. Then her face lit up like a Fourth of July firework, and I could see the second it dawned on her.

"Oh. My. God," she breathed. "Are you…Edward are you going to…are you gonna…"

"Mmhmm," I nodded.

She threw her tiny arms around my neck and jumped on me; squealing like a banshee.

I laughed and wrapped my arms around her. After about five minutes, she was finally ready to climb off of me. When I pulled her away, her eyes were glistening.

"I know Bella and I have only been together for a short time," I said sheepishly. "But Alice, she's the one for me. I know it. I don't need a few more weeks, or a few more months to be sure. I'm sure now. And Maddie…well Maddie just completes the picture for me. And I think…I _think_ Bella feels the same, so I just don't see the point in waiting," I shrugged.

Her smile grew so wide she looked like Jack Nicholson in that old Batman movie. She hugged me again.

"She does Edward. I know she does. Oh my God, I'm so happy for you," her voice cracked and she pulled me into a hug again, her small arms stretching high to reach my neck.

"Maybe you should hold off on that happiness," I chuckled. "Bella hasn't actually said yes to me yet."

"Pfft!" she snorted, pulling away to look at me again. "She'll say yes Edward. I know she will."

I chuckled nervously.

"So when are you planning on popping the question?"

"Over Christmas. When we're up at mom and dad's. I figure on Christmas Day I'll give her the canvas painting I ordered made of her and Maddie at Rockefeller Center, and then maybe the next day…"

Alice laughed wryly. "Good going. She'll be miles away from home, surrounded by Cullens. No way can she turn you down."

I frowned. "Do you think it's in bad taste? Should I wait until we get back?"

Alice rolled her eyes and punched me in the arm.

"Ow!" Little witch packed a serious punch for someone so vertically-challenged.

"I'm just teasing you dummy!" she snorted. "I think over Christmas is a great idea," she said, with a dreamy look on her face.

I smirked. "Do you mind that, if she says yes," Alice rolled her eyes again, "we'll probably be planning a wedding around the same time as you?"

She smiled playfully at me again. "No dummy. Of course I don't mind. I'm officially earning another sister _and_ a niece. Being upstaged is the least of my concerns."

I gave her a dubious look.

"Besides," she shrugged, "knowing Bella, she'll pick something pretty, but simple for her wedding dress. And that is _so_ not the look I'm going for," she giggled heartily.

For an instant, I thought back to the picture of Bella I'd seen back in her old room in Forks, of her marrying Paul. Yes, her dress had been simple, Alice was right. But she'd looked like the most glorious creature in the world. I felt a painfully bittersweet tug at my heart, and couldn't help hoping that she'd pick something completely different for our wedding – _if_ she said yes.

Alice broke me out of my thoughts.

"So you're going to adopt Maddie, right?"

I inhaled deeply.

Alice had no idea what was going on. I hadn't told anyone except my father, and he wasn't very happy with me. He didn't agree with my decision to keep from Bella the fact that I'd hired a PI to track Paul. And the truth was, I may have told her, _if_ the PI had found Paul safely back in Hoquiam, where he was supposed to be living, working quietly at the casino he was supposed to be working at, shacking up with some lowlife, utterly unconcerned about his ex-wife and daughter and the media sensation that had befallen them overnight.

But it had been almost two weeks, and all Demetri could tell me was that Paul was in some serious debt up in Washington, that he owed money to some pretty nasty people, that he'd been involved in dealing some pretty illegal substances.

And that he had no idea where he was now.

"Are you okay Edward?" Alice asked, her forehead etched with worry lines. Thinking about Paul and his still unknown whereabouts had obviously affected me.

"Yeah. Sure. I'm fine," I lied. I couldn't tell Alice. She'd tell Bella. And I didn't want to worry Bella. No matter where Paul was, I'd take care of her and Maddie. There was no use in worrying her. I wouldn't be letting her or Maddie out of my sight for very long anyway, until Demetri finally found Paul.

"Of course I'm going to adopt Maddie," I smiled, feeling the tenseness in my muscles relax as I pictured my princess and her sweet little dimpled smile. "As soon as possible."

"But…" Alice asked, an apologetic look on her face, "Bella's ex-husband has to sign the termination papers first, right?"

I stared at her for a few moments before nodding my head once.

"Do you think he'll give you a hard time?"

I wanted to pinch the bridge of my nose, but Alice wasn't stupid. She'd realize something was really bothering me. So instead, I answered the best way I could, even though I was pretty sure at that point it was a lie.

"I hope not."

Alice looked like she wanted to ask something, but then changed her mind. She sighed and then turned back to the display case with a smile.

"So the bracelet then, I suppose is for Maddie?" she teased.

"Yes," I chuckled. "The bracelet is for Maddie." I'd picked out three charms for it. One of a ballerina, one of a princess, and the last simply said three words on it, in perfect script: Daddy's Little Girl.

Alice fingered the last charm gently. She turned to me with glistening eyes again.

"When are you going to give her this?"

"I'm going to give her the bracelet for Christmas, but I figured I'd hold on to that particular charm," I nodded my head towards the charm still between Alice's fingers, "until Bella says yes. It'll give me something to give Maddie that day also, since her mom's going to get a piece of jewelry. I mean, if she…_doesn't_…say yes, I mean, well, then I wouldn't really be able to give Maddie, that charm," I stuttered. My heart twisted painfully at the thought.

Alice put one hand on my shoulder. "Stop." She smiled gently. "She'll say yes Edward. She'll say yes," she repeated in a sure voice.

I inhaled deeply again and let it out in a huge gust. "I hope you're right."

OOOOOOOOOO

I walked back into the office that morning whistling a tune to myself, feeling anxious and excited for the days ahead, but for a completely different reason now. Not knowing where Paul was still weighed heavily on my mind, and I knew I'd made Bella uneasy the other night when we'd been in Central Park. But it was getting to the point where every time I saw a tall, dark, muscular guy, I thought it was Paul. I was being paranoid, I knew it. But until I got word from Demetri that he'd found Paul, I wouldn't be able to stop.

But this morning, I felt lighter. Why hadn't I thought of it before? Bella would be my wife. Maddie would be my daughter. Paul would never again have any claim on either of their lives. The termination papers would be probably be a problem, yes. But with Bella as a Cullen, I was hopeful it would be easier to show the family courts that allowing me to adopt Maddie would be better for her, in the long run.

So yeah. I was anxious for Christmas. I was anxious for Demetri to find Paul. The muscles in my back were knotted so tight I could feel the strain on them every time I moved. I needed a serious massage from my hopefully-almost-fiance.

I must've called Demetri with my mind, because as soon as I sat at my desk, my cell phone rang. "Yes Demetri. Any news?" I asked, my heart rate accelerating.

"Mr. Cullen. Yes, I have news for you. I don't know whether you'll particularly like it though."

My fist automatically clenched over my desk. "What is it?"

"I've traced him back to the tri-state area." I closed my eyes, feeling as if all the air were being sucked out of my lungs. "He was staying at a hotel in North Jersey, but he'd checked out already by the time I got there. Then I traced him to a motel right over the Tunnel, in Jersey City."

"What the hell is he doing in New Jersey?" I asked.

"I'm not really sure Mr. Cullen. I'm out here at the motel now. I'll give you a call as soon as he shows up."

I placed my elbows over my desk and put my head between my hands as soon as I hung up.

"Jesus Christ," I muttered to myself, rubbing my forehead hard. "He's right here. _Fuck_. He's right here."

About two minutes into my torment, my office phone rang. I picked it up absentmindedly.

"Ed man, you need to get down here right away," Emmett said. His voice sounded more urgent than I was used to hearing from him.

I exhaled heavily. "Down here where exactly?"

"Rosalie's office," he answered. That right there made me nervous, because Em rarely called his wife by her full name. She was always either Rose or Rosie to him, unless we were in meetings or something.

"I'll be right there."

Jasper met me on the way down. Neither of us had any idea what Emmett wanted. Whatever it was though, I was seriously not up for any additional shit today. I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that Paul was somewhere, out in the tri-state area, and I had absolutely no idea where, and no idea what he wanted. I was just grateful that at least both Bella and Maddie were in the building today, since it was Maddie's recital tonight and we'd be heading there straight from the office.

When we stepped through the re-entry door to the twentieth floor, my first instinct was to check on Bella and Maddie, and then go see what Emmett wanted afterwards. But then I remembered the strange tone of Emmett's voice. I walked in step with Jasper towards Rosalie's office, hoping that, whatever the problem was, we could resolve it quickly. I was more than anxious to hear from Demetri again.

As soon as we stepped foot into her office though, it was clear something was very wrong.

Emmett was sitting on the corner of Rosalie's desk, his body angled towards her, murmuring something quietly to her in a soft, soothing voice; the way I only heard him speak to her when they thought no one was listening, and very different from the way he'd just sounded on the phone. Everything in his posture radiated tenseness, protectiveness. Rosalie sat at her desk, pale and obviously distressed, though she looked more angry than anything.

"No Em, I'm fine," she was saying as we walked in. "If I weren't, believe me, I'd tell you." Her voice was as serious as Emmett's had been, but at the same time, she sounded as if she were trying to reassure him. She rubbed at her stomach absently. But I could see the anxiousness still on my brother's face.

"Rose, are you okay?" I asked, flinging the door behind Jasper and me, too concerned to bother to close it properly. Jazz and I both stopped in front of her desk. When I looked to my left, I was surprised to see Rosalie's secretary sitting on one of the black leather chairs. She looked…terrified, as if she'd just had front row seats to a horror show.

Rosalie and Emmett both looked over to Jasper and me, taking us in slowly, as if they'd just realized we were there. Something in both their expressions made my pulse quicken. Emmett turned around on Rose's desk. Rose swiveled her chair to face forward.

"Why don't you both sit down?" Rosalie asked in an even tone. Though she was speaking to both of us, her eyes remained on me.

Jasper took a seat.

I remained standing, digging my hands deep in my pockets. "What's going on?"

Rose exchanged a quick glance with her husband. She exhaled loudly.

"I just fired Lauren."

"What?" Jasper cried incredulously. "Why? What happened?"

I had a different question. "What did she want?"

Rose lifted her brows. "She wanted the Cartwright account back. She wanted the Springtime Organix account. She wanted to be the one to pitch to Natural Wonders next month, and she felt she was the best one qualified to fill in for me when I go on maternity leave next spring."

"Those are all Bella's responsibilities," Jasper stated in a confused tone. "What is she, nuts?"

I met Rosalie's gaze. "Or?"

Out of my periphery, I could see Jasper looking up at me, puzzled.

Rose, however, knew exactly what I meant.

Her lips tightened. "Or," she inclined her head, "she'll sue you and me for sexual harassment."

"What?" Jasper cried again. But I couldn't share his surprise.

Rose shrugged and shook her head. "I told her to kiss my ass. Who the fuck did she think she was trying to blackmail? Hmph," she snorted, "She's been doing a shitty-ass job around here for weeks now. I was just waiting until after the holidays to issue her that warning we'd spoken about," she said, looking from me to Jasper and her husband. "Then she said we'd all regret it if we tried to fire her. So that's exactly what I did," she said, lifting her chin defiantly. "We have a trail of records and unhappy clients to back us up if the need arises. She was becoming a liability to this agency rather than an asset."

Rose was right. Lauren's performance had started to become a problem. Still, if I hadn't been such a thoughtless prick all those months ago, there would've been no need for this to get as messy as it was threatening to become.

"She went ballistic when I fired her, as if she really hadn't thought I'd do it," Rose chuckled humorlessly. She sighed. "Started yelling and screaming so loud even poor Liz here heard her outside my office."

I looked over at her secretary. No wonder she looked so frightened.

"I heard everything she said to Rosalie," Liz said, with a scowl on her face. "She said she'd tell everyone Edward was harassing her, and that Rosalie knew and did nothing about it. But Edward," she looked up at me, "me and the other secretaries saw how she's always thrown herself at _you_. I'm willing to testify if it comes to that, and I'm sure they would be too."

I attempted a grateful smile, but was pretty sure it fell short.

"I called security to come escort her out of Rosalie's office," Liz continued.

Rose snorted. "Good timing Liz," she winked in her direction. "I was about to kick her ass and really give her a reason to sue me."

"Babe," Emmett reproached her gently. "The baby."

She rolled her eyes. "The baby's nice and safe Em, don't worry. Probably would've been cheering me on in there." She looked down at her stomach and patted it lovingly. "Wouldn't you baby?" she cooed. "Yeah, you would've," she chuckled. "Kick her ass mommy," she mimicked her unborn child.

Emmett snorted.

I shook my head, standing there in silence, trying to process what had just occurred.

Friggin' witch had had no compunction whatsoever with irritating Rosalie in the condition she was in. The thought made me furious not just with Lauren, but with myself; because the truth was, this was all my fault.

I looked at my brother; the concern etched in his usually carefree face was evident, deep lines marred his wide forehead, his eyes were cautious and narrowed; I didn't think they'd moved away from Rosalie for more than two seconds since I'd walked in; his lips were pulled in tightly; his huge muscled frame completely angled towards Rose. He looked rigid and tense, as if ready to pounce on anyone who made the slightest false move in her direction. I couldn't blame him. Rosalie was his wife, and his future family was growing inside her. If it would've been Bella that had been threatened that way, by _anybody_, I was pretty sure I'd hunt them down and rip their throats out.

Bella.

Shit. What would I tell her now? How could I look her in the eyes and tell her that, instead of things with the media calming down in the next few weeks, there was a possibility they'd get even worse? I closed my eyes; the reality of the situation finally hitting me. My head started spinning.

It would be a fucking media circus, and Bella and Maddie would be caught right in the crossfire.

_Fuck_. What had I done?

My heart started racing as all the implications rang clear. How could I ever expect her to marry me now, in the midst of a sexual harassment suit? What fucking court would allow me to adopt Maddie _now_? It didn't matter whether Lauren proved her case or not; the accusation was there. It would make everything exponentially harder for Bella, Maddie and myself.

I'd never wanted to go back in time and erase a moment as much as I did then.

"I'm sorry," I said, unaware I'd said the words aloud until a few seconds later. But I was; for what Rose had had to deal with a short while ago, even if she did look more than ready to go a few rounds right now; for what the entire agency would possibly have to deal with in the near future…and for what the two most important girls in my life might have to deal with.

I drew in a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. "I'm so sorry."

Rose stared at me for a long moment. Then she pursed her lips and shook her head back and forth.

"You know what Edward, what's done is done. You're not that guy anymore." She shrugged, a blasé expression on her face, and left it at that. "Now what we have to do is head this shit off at the pass. Call Aro and his team," she instructed. "Let'em know what might be coming down the line."

"I'll take care of it," I said evenly.

Rose, Em and Jasper nodded.

"She doesn't have a leg to stand on legally," Emmett said thoughtfully, "But what do you think we can expect as far as publicity goes, if she does go through with this threat?"

Jasper ran his hand through his hair.

"Well," he sighed, "it won't be good at first. But I think once the facts come out, we'll be fine. What about the clients?"

"The clients might be worried about how this will affect their company's reputations," I answered honestly.

"But if we can get the facts out there right away," Rose added quickly, "there shouldn't be too many repercussions."

"The Cartwrights?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. They may have been perverts, but they were old-fashioned perverts.

Rose bit the inside of her lip. The action made me think of Bella. I was so unbelievably grateful she'd missed all of this. "The Cartwrights may be a bit more difficult than the other clients to appease." She looked away thoughtfully. "Maybe we should have Bella feel them out-"

"Bella's not finding out about this."

All heads looked up at me, varying degrees of startled expressions on their faces.

"What do you mean Bella's not finding out about this?" Rose asked carefully.

"I don't want her to know about this."

She glared at me incredulously. "Why not?"

None of them had any idea of what was going on with Paul, or Demetri. And now this. How was I supposed to tell Bella, on the day of Maddie's first recital, only a few days away from Christmas, about the shit-storms that were apparently headed our way? That not only was her ex-husband on the east coast for some reason, but that our faces would be plastered on every paper for the next few weeks, not because of our relationship any more, but because I was being sued for sexual harassment.

I shook my head. "Unless we receive a more concrete threat from Lauren, there's no reason to let Bella know."

Rosalie's glare tightened. "You have to tell her Edward," she said in a warning tone. "You can't leave her in the dark about this! Look, if you're worried she'll be upset at you, I'm sure she won't. She knows Lauren was the one-"

I cut her off. "It has nothing to do with that." I drew in a deep breath, and lied, though at the time I tried to tell myself it was the truth. "Rose, I really wish Lauren would've come to me with these threats, instead of you. But determining who else needs to be informed at this point is a business decision, not a personal one, and as such, it's ultimately something Emmett, Jasper and I need to decide." I looked away from Rose's infuriated glare, and turned my eyes to Emmett, who had his head down, and then towards Jasper, who stared back at me uneasily. "Unless this becomes an official concern, I don't believe Bella needs to be informed."

Rosalie looked from her husband, to Jasper, and then back to me. If looks could kill, I would've been six feet under already.

Abruptly, she slammed her palms against her desk and stood up. "You're such an idiot," she hissed angrily, fire burning in her blue eyes. "Like I said before, you don't need to worry about me, because I can take care of myself. But don't tell me this is just a business-decision, because it's _not_," she slammed one hand over her desk again. "You _need_ to tell her-"

Her eyes quickly flashed behind me; I didn't even need to turn around to know who was standing there. Even with the unimaginable stress surrounding me, the electric hum that always buzzed when she was around quickly alerted me to Bella's presence.

OOOOOOOOOO

There were no missed phone calls from Demetri back at my office, and my cell phone hadn't vibrated once.

I leaned my forehead up against the long, cold windows while I waited for my Uncle to come to the phone. I had to keep myself busy while I waited for Demetri's phone call. Besides, I owed it to my family to take care of this problem with Lauren as quickly as possible.

A white mix of snow, sleet and rain fell from grey skies; blanketing the black rooftops of the smaller buildings in shiny, slippery ice, and making the windows feel like enormous glaciers against my skin. Everywhere I looked, everything was black, white or grey; from the dark coats of the tiny figures wandering around quickly down below, to their open umbrella's, to the steel skyscrapers circling us. All black, white and grey.

"Aro Volturi!" my uncle barked into the phone.

"Uncle Aro, its Edward."

"Edward my boy," he said, his voice softening slightly. "How's everything? How're things working out with keeping an eye on P-L-Double-G's ex?"

I breathed heavily into the phone. "Not too good Aro. Demetri's tracked him down to New Jersey."

"Jersey?" Aro snapped. "What the hell is he doing in Jersey?"

"I don't know," I breathed wearily. "I'm waiting for a phone call from Demetri. Every time he thinks he's caught up to him, Forrester disappears. I have no idea what's going on."

Aro was quiet for a few seconds. "You think maybe he might know he's got someone on his tail?"

"The thought has occurred to me."

Aro was quiet again. "You know, maybe his being in Jersey has nothing at all to do with Bella."

That thought had occurred to me too. Still…I didn't buy it. Maybe I _was_ being paranoid. But I couldn't help thinking his presence here on the East Coast had _everything_ to do with Bella and Maddie.

"I hope you're right," I said anyway, running my hand through my hair.

"Have you told Bella?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "No."

Aro sighed impatiently. From the very beginning, he'd sided with my father on this one.

"You should really tell her godson. One thing I know about women, they don't like stuff being kept from them."

"I don't want to worry her unnecessarily," I said, as I had when we'd first discussed this.

"Well if her ex-husband is around, and if he is here for her, it might not be unnecessary anymore."

My grip tightened around the phone, fury licking at the corners of my mind even at the _thought_ of him coming anywhere near Bella or Maddie. I remembered how Emmett had looked before, back at Rosalie's office. Like a grizzly bear ready to pounce. I could imagine what he'd felt like, because it was how I felt when I thought of anyone harming Bella or Maddie, in _any_ way, shape or form. They were my family, as much as Rose and their unborn baby was Emmett's, and I'd make anyone who ever dared to cause them any pain live to regret it.

"I'm not letting Bella or Maddie out of my sight until I know for sure what Paul's doing here. I'm _not_ going to let anything happen to them."

I could tell by the silence on the other line that my uncle still didn't agree with my decision not to tell Bella.

"That wasn't the reason for my call," I said, changing the subject. I filled him in on the situation with Lauren, including the unbelievably stupid thing I'd done last summer in the conference room with her.

He whistled through his teeth when I was done, a low, deep whistle. "Wow, that girl must be either really stupid or really ballsy to have come out like that at Rose."

"The former," I answered dryly.

"Hmm," he snorted. "Well, I'm not gonna give you shit about how dumb-fucking stupid it was to go at it with her in the workplace, because I think you've figured that out for yourself."

I rubbed my forehead hard with the tips of my fingers. "Yeah, I have."

He chuckled. "Next time you take that shit home godson, to the privacy of your own bedroom."

"There won't be a next time," I spat through clenched teeth.

He snorted. "No. I can't imagine there will be. So what does Bella say about all this?"

I didn't answer.

"Don't tell me you're keeping this from her too?"

"I don't see the point in telling her when we have no idea how serious Lauren was about that threat."

"Jesus godson. Look, I may not know a helluva lot about keeping women happy outside of the bedroom, and I've got three divorces under my belt to prove it, but I _do_ know that that shit about honesty being the best policy tends to be good advice."

I shook my head, frustrated. "There's just so much shit going on right now…" I thought of the simple, sparkling ring I'd purchased this morning. Just a few hours ago, I'd been soaring, my expectations for the upcoming weekend high. Now the ring felt tauntingly heavy in the inside pocket of my suit jacket. "I can't. I _can't_ put this on her right now."

But what was my other choice? Propose, and _then_ tell her I'd been having her ex-husband followed for days, and oh yeah, that I was being accused of sexually harassing an employee? My head spun again, unable to find a way out of the black hole I'd dug for myself. Instead, it kept growing and growing, sucking me in even deeper.

I shook my head quickly back and forth to clear my mind. "Aro, I called you in a legal capacity, as CCW's lead attorney." It was time to get this phone call back on track.

After a few moments of silence, Aro spoke. His voice was stiffer, formal now. "I'll have to call Rosalie to get some more details. And I'll want to look into her previous employment history."

"I can have Mrs. Cope from HR get that information to you right away."

"Good. Regardless, it's less than a week 'til Christmas. If what Ms. Mallory is looking for is a nice pay-off, and from what I've heard I'd bet my ass she is, nothing will get filed between now and then. That gives us a few days to figure this shit out before anything goes public. Give me forty-eight hours or so, and I should have more information for you."

A few minutes after I'd gotten off the phone with my uncle, my cell phone vibrated. I picked it up quickly, breathing apprehensively when I saw it was finally Demetri.

"What happened Demetri?" I asked right away.

"I spoke to one of the house-cleaning staff. She told me Paul checked out this morning, before I arrived. He'd been saying some things about heading to bigger and better things."

My shoulders sagged. I slumped in my chair.

"Do you think he's headed back home?"

"Honestly Mr. Cullen, no. My gut tells me he's moved across the tunnel. That's what I'd call bigger and better. And that's where I'm headed now." He paused. "I…" - he cleared his throat meaningfully – "convinced the cleaning lady to let me take a look at his room before she cleaned it out."

"What did you find?"

"Empty beer bottles, cigarette stubs, half-eaten burger." Another pause. "There _was_ one thing…"

"What?"

"A piece of paper with some figures written on it. Monetary figures. In ascending order. Two different hand-writings alternating. One had the careless sprawl of a man's penmanship, the other the more careful swirls of a female's writing. I've compared it to the slip he filled out when he checked-in. The uh…" – he cleared his throat again – "helpful young lady at the front desk was kind enough to let me take a look at it."

I smirked. "And?"

"And the male's penmanship definitely matches Mr. Forrester's. It's hard to know at this point who the other penmanship belongs to, but I can have a friend of mine over at the third precinct run it through some programs."

"Have you called Jenks yet?"

"No Mr. Cullen. I figured I'd call you first. I'll call him next."

I nodded. "Good." I inhaled sharply. "Demetri, what was the final figure on the paper?"

My brows lifted high at his response. "That's a lot of money."

"Yes, Mr. Cullen. It definitely is."

We were both silent for a few moments.

"Demetri, what do you know about tracking devices?"

"What sort of tracking devices, Mr. Cullen?" I could hear the excitement in his voice. I supposed this topic of conversation was right up his alley.

"The sort you can fit invisibly into a bracelet."

OOOOOOOOOO

After Maddie's recital that night, when I slid inside of Bella, I wondered if she could feel the stiffness in my shoulders as she curled her fingers around them, her nails tracing each line and definition, trying to pull me impossibly closer to her; if she could see the anxiety in my eyes as she met and held my gaze while we pulled and pushed against one another; if she could sense the chaos gripping my mind as tightly as I gripped her thighs. I moved my mouth down to hers, swallowing her kisses, losing myself in the thrust of her hips, in the sweetness of her cries, in my own wordless groans.

Yes, she could sense my turmoil. I felt it in the way she held me afterwards, gripping me tightly as if she wanted to create a barrier with our bodies, some sort of fortification to keep us safe from all the forces hurdling towards us. Forces she wasn't even aware of. Abruptly, a huge wave of guilt pressed down on me, weighing down my lungs, sucking all my breath away so suddenly that the pants induced by our love-making became desperate pants for air. Bella held me tighter, pressing her body into mine as if she could sense my need for her, my need for us to be one. She knew something was wrong, but she thought it was all about Lauren's firing. She didn't know, didn't imagine, that I couldn't have cared _less_ about Lauren having been fired, and only marginally more about the lawsuit she'd threatened. The only thing that weighed on me about that lawsuit was how it would affect Rose and the rest of my family in the short run.

In the long run, it meant nothing.

It was Paul that was killing me; the unshakeable feeling that his presence here was so much more than just a coincidence. The image burned behind my eyes of a paper I hadn't even seen, filled with figures that I had no idea what to make of. _These_ were the things that were torturing me. _This_ was what I wanted to take her and Maddie away from this weekend; away until Demetri could _finally_ catch up to Paul, and once and for all figure out what was going on. He was close, so close. But Paul kept managing to stay one step ahead; as if he knew somehow, that he had to.

But Bella had agreed to wait until we were away for me to tell her what was going on. Aro, my father, Rosalie, they were all right. I had to tell her everything. Everything was too close, and I wasn't sure I could keep it away forever. She deserved to know. I'd kept the truth from her for too long, and I'd pay the price when I finally told her. I just hoped the price wasn't more than I could bear.

I carefully lifted Bella's head off of my chest, bringing her eyes to mine. Chocolate orbs swam with undisguised love, and forgiveness, and understanding. She would be upset, yes, but she'd understand. Her eyes suddenly made everything better; they were the doors to everything good in my life; to the only things that mattered.

"I love you more than anything Bella. Both you and Maddie. No matter what, _always_ remember that."

She lifted a soft hand and gently caressed my cheek. I pressed my face deeper into her warm fingers.

"I love you too Edward. With all my heart and soul. Always remember _that_."

* * *

**A/N:** **I know most of you wanted to know NOW what Bella decides, but I felt it was really important to show this day from E's POV, even though I usually hate doing that. Lots of important info that only he knew, which is important to the story at this point. **

**Next chapter will answer the burning question:**

**Who shot J.R.?**

**Just kidding. The **_**real**_** burning question.**

**EPOV again next time. Don't forget to head to the twilighted forum if you want to discuss.**

**Two more updates next week**. **We're almost there guys**. **About three or so chapters left.**

**And of course, reviews, even the ones where you tell me how much you hate me, are always appreciated.**


	34. Ch 33 But You Can't Escape

**A/N: Alright, let's get right to it. **

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a little longer…**

**Chapter Song Recs:**

**_Possibility_ - by Likke Lei  
****_Escape_ – by Enrique Iglesias (Sideline confession: I have a very girlie crush on Enrique).  
****_The Hardest Thing_ - by 98 Degrees**

* * *

**Chapter 33 - But You Can't Escape…**

**EPOV**

**Morning of Dec. 23****rd**_: _

The tick-tocking of the dark grandfather clock in the corner was driving me crazy. For all its noise, the hands on the clock were moving unbearably slow this afternoon, as if weighed down by some invisible force. I looked up from my laptop again, rubbing my right eye with the palm of my hand, and groaned when I realized only three minutes had passed by since I'd last looked up. I was anxious for the day to end already so I could take Bella home, pick up Maddie, and get ready for the holiday weekend.

For the past twenty-four hours or so though, my anxiety had taken on a different form; that of nervous anticipation. No matter what, Bella and I would be having a long overdue talk this weekend. And regardless of how upset or disappointed in me she'd be after that talk, I was going to ask her to marry me at some point this weekend.

Because fuck it, I couldn't live without her or Maddie, and I wasn't going to pretend I could. And no matter how pissed off at me she got, that wasn't going to change.

Absentmindedly, I patted the inside pocket of my waistcoat, feeling the small black velvet box tucked carefully inside. My mouth pulled up at one corner.

'_She'll say yes Edward. I know she will.'_

Alice's assurances that my proposal would be well-received rang out in my head, her green eyes as sure as confident as they always were when she gave one of her predictions. I held on to her conviction, put all my faith in her uncanny and slightly freaky ability to predict situations and outcomes, and tried to let that drown out the uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach; the feeling that I was missing something; something big.

When my cell phone rang, I was less surprised than I should have been to see it was Demetri.

"Mr. Cullen," - Demetri's voice was as cool as always, but there was something different in it too - "I have an early Christmas present for you."

"You found him." I held my breath while I waited for his confirmation.

"I've found him," Demetri replied confidently. I sat back against my chair and let out a long, deep breath.

"He's staying at the Times Square Denali Hotel. Checked in yesterday."

"Is he there right now?" I asked. At the same time I stood up and grabbed the suit jacket wrapped around the back of my chair and started pushing my free arm through one sleeve.

I wasn't sure what I was going for, or what the fuck I was planning on doing once I got there, but I was going, and I wasn't leaving without some answers, like what the fuck he was doing in New York, and what all those numbers on that paper Demetri had found were all about.

"No, he's not here right now Mr. Cullen."

I froze, the empty sleeve of my jacket falling limply at my side. I pinched the bridge of my nose, with my free hand.

"But he is returning. I spoke to the young lady at the concierge desk, and she tells me he's not due to check out until tomorrow morning. And although the housecleaner wouldn't agree to let me have a look inside, she confirms that all Mr. Forrester's clothes and possessions are still in his room. I'm still working on her though, and I'm pretty confident she'll let me take a look before he checks out."

I weighed my options for the space of three seconds.

One: wait here for Demetri to call me back once Paul showed up, and risk him disappearing again before I could get there.

Two: Go and wait for him. Find out once and for all what the hell was going on, and be able to spend the rest of the weekend with Bella and Maddie, knowing they were safe. No matter how upset at me Bella might get, at least I'd know they were safe.

"I'm on my way," I said, bringing the other sleeve of my jacket back up and pushing my arm through it while balancing the phone between my ear and my neck.

"Mr. Cullen, I'm not so sure that's such a-"

"Demetri, I'm on my way."

Demetri was silent for three seconds. "Call me when you're a couple of blocks away. I'll let you know where I'm waiting. You can't just show up in the hotel lobby Mr. Cullen. Mr. Forrester won't recognize me, but…he'd probably recognize you. If he does have…mercenary plans, we don't want to scare him off now that we've caught up to him."

I hung up and turned quickly back to my laptop, closing down the programs I had open. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw my office door open and glanced up.

Rosalie walked over to my desk, a frown wrinkling her forehead.

"Where are you going?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I've got something to do," I answered without looking up. "I'll try to be back in a couple of hours." I started walking towards the door, leaving her behind me, looking confused. But I didn't have time to explain. I paused for a split second with my hand on the doorknob.

"Rose, if you see Bella, please don't-"

"What do you mean if I see Bella?" She sounded puzzled. "I thought that's where you were going?"

I let go of the doorknob and turned around. Rose stood facing me, the frown over her forehead now more prominent.

"Where I was going?"

"Yeah." She nodded once, leaning her head forward. "Aren't you going to see Bella?"

"Downstairs?" I puzzled, my eyes narrowing.

Rose drew her head back and straightened herself up slowly. Her eyes widened, the lines over her forehead turning up.

"Edward, Bella's not downstairs," she said cautiously. I narrowed my eyes further. "She left."

"Left?" I said quickly moving closer to her. My blood suddenly pounded painfully in my veins.

"Yes," Rose nodded again, in a tone that implied I should have known this. "She cancelled our lunch because she said she had a doctor's appointment, and then called and said she was going to go straight home from there, because she wasn't feeling well."

"_What_?"

"Didn't she tell you?"

I stared at her blankly for a long moment. "No."

Then I was pulling out my cell phone and calling Bella's number.

Rosalie stared at me while the call connected and I waited for Bella to pick up.

"I have to admit, I was a bit surprised when I asked her if you were taking her home and she said no, especially with how awful she sounded." I closed my eyes, waiting for Bella to pick up. "I thought maybe you'd stayed in the office because of that meeting we have with Aro in a few minutes."

_Fuck_. I'd forgotten we'd set up a meeting with Aro this afternoon to discuss what he'd come up with so far regarding Lauren's potential threat.

"I actually came up to tell you that you didn't have to stay this afternoon just for that. Emmett, Jasper and I can handle it if you wanted to go and take care of Bella."

Bella's voice mail picked up. I left her a message to call me back and hung up.

"_Fuuck!"_ I hissed, closing my eyes again and pressing the cell phone into my forehead. When I opened them back up I met Rosalie's bewildered eyes. "Why didn't she tell me she wasn't feeling well and was leaving?"

Rose shrugged. "I guess she didn't want to worry you. She knows how you are."

"How long ago did she leave?"

"A couple of hours ago, I suppose."

I tried calling her again. Again, it went to voicemail. I tried her apartment. Her answering machine picked up. I left another message.

"Alright, I've got to go," I said urgently, moving to the door at an even brisker pace than before and throwing it open roughly. "I'm sorry Rose." I turned quickly to face her. "I know this whole shit with Lauren is my fault, but I've got to go check on Bella. I don't know why she's not answering her phones.

"Look, I told you to stop with the apologies. I'm not worried about Lauren. And like I said, we can meet with Aro and his team without you." She flipped her hand in the air and waved me off. "Bella's probably resting at her apartment and doesn't hear her phones. But go. Go make Bella some tea and give her a foot massage or something. We'll be fine here without you two for the rest of the afternoon."

I took the first cab that stopped for me outside the building, in too much of a hurry to waste time going to get my car out of the garage. Figures, colors, shapes all blurred together as we sped down the city streets, as bright and colorful as the lights decorating the huge tree at Rockefeller Plaza. Last minute Christmas shoppers filled block after block, weighed down by heavy coats and hats, but still managing to lug huge department store bags full of holiday presents. Voices full of excitement, chiming holiday bells, anxious car horns blaring- all these noises filtered in through the raised windows inside the cab. The stores lining Fifth Avenue overflowed with people and lights and big bright signs. Banners and ads against lighted holiday store windows already announced After-Christmas sales and deep discounts.

I tried calling Bella again on both her cell and at home. Once again, both calls went to voice mail. I ran a frustrated hand through my hair.

Why hadn't she told me she wasn't feeling well? It made no sense for her to have left the office in the middle of the day that way and not said a word about it to me. I closed my eyes and drew in a sharp breath, releasing it quickly. My legs bounced uneasily in the backseat, banging up against the seat in front of me. I cursed under my breath when I tried calling Bella again without any luck. Shaking my head, I swirled my finger around the app that activated the GPS tracker on Maddie's bracelet. I'd promised myself I wouldn't use it unless I had to, unless it was an emergency. And I'd prayed to God that I'd never encounter such a case. But by this time my heart was beating painfully against my chest, and my insides were coiled so tightly I was afraid the slightest movement would make me snap. This was an emergency.

With one press of a button, the coordinates to Maddie's current location popped up on my phone. According to the tracking device, at least Maddie was still at Sue's house.

I called over there to see if Sue had heard from Bella. She picked up on the third ring, but unfortunately, hadn't heard from Bella.

"Did you say she wasn't feeling well?" Sue asked, sounding slightly concerned. In the background, I could hear sounds of little voices laughing and playing. I wondered what Maddie was doing just then, and smiled briefly at the image of her small, round face that popped into my head, dimpled cheeks and bright brown eyes.

"Yes. She told my sister-in-law she was going home."

"Oh. Well then she's most likely at home sleeping or something Edward," she breathed more easily. "She probably didn't pick up Maddie yet so that she could take it easy for a little while. No matter how good Maddie is, she still needs taking care of," she chuckled soothingly.

"Yes, I suppose you're right." I promised her I'd be over to pick Maddie up later, and hung up, thinking I could've taken care of her just fine while Bella rested. I could've taken care of both of them.

I stared out the cab window, watching blankly as a flock of birds swooped down over the frozen waters of the East River, trying to catch fish just below the first layers of ice. Across the channel, Brooklyn lay in shades of brown and grey, looking colder than usual, the sky over it dark, and threatening some sort of precipitation; its waterfront frozen so solid that even the fancy lofts over it seemed to congeal; windows looked like ice, walls looked like tall, dark glaciers in the distance.

I was so lost in anxious thoughts that it took me a couple of minutes to realize that everything inside the car ahead of us was too easy to make out, from the driver busy typing out a one-handed text, to the box of tissues on his back window, to the white pearled rosary hanging from the rearview mirror. I looked around and realized it was the same for all the cars surrounding us; nothing blurred by any longer. Although it was still a couple of hours until the official start of rush hour, we were now trapped on the FDR in the middle of bumper to bumper traffic. I snorted impatiently. Two days to Christmas in the busiest city in the world; it would be rush hour around here for the next seventy-two hours or so.

After calling Bella again with the same results, I pressed down on the 'End Call' button roughly, fisting the phone between my hands and banging it against the seat next to me. My legs bounced even more restlessly against the cab floor, my right foot pressing down anxiously over an imaginary gas pedal, wishing there was some way to just climb over all the other fucking cars stuck here.

I huffed and exhaled impatiently.

"Hey buddy, why don't you get off this highway on Chambers Street and take it all the way down to the West Side to the Brooklyn Battery?"

The cab driver gave me an exasperated glance through the rear-view.

"The Battery Tunnel's gonna cost you more," he droned, chewing on a toothpick.

"Do I fucking look like I give a shit about it costing me more? Just hurry the fuck up please."

It took twice as long as normal to get to Bella's apartment, and about twenty minutes longer than it would've had I been driving myself instead of that dumb-fuck of a cab driver. By the time I took the stoop steps three at a time, reaching into my pocket and realizing I'd left Bella's spare key in the office, I was wound up so tightly by panic that I growled loudly and put a fist through the cement wall next to the vestibule door. I pressed a jittery finger over the doorbell and rang it once, my head down and the palm of my other hand up against the door. I waited. Nothing. I rang again, this time jamming my finger roughly over the doorbell until the count of ten. A wave of guilt washed over me, if Bella was indeed feeling so unwell that she was passed out on her bed, oblivious to my twenty phone calls and agitated door bell ringing. But again, there was no answer. I backed up away from the door, leaning against the cement frame of the wall, and drew in a deep breath. Just as I was about to kick the door, a sharp buzz erupted from the intercom. I grabbed the doorknob and turned it forcefully to the right, pushing the door open so hard that it banged against the inside wall. My blood racing in my veins, I ran up the steps.

Bella opened the door before I could knock, and the sight of her knocked the last bit of air out of my lungs. I inhaled sharply.

Her eyes were puffy and red-rimmed, as if she'd been crying for hours. Her long, dark hair was in total disarray, as if she'd just gotten out of bed. Which I figured was probably the case if she didn't feel well. It would also explain the puffiness of her eyes.

But what the hell explained what was inside them, and the spasm of fear that ricocheted through my insides when I looked into them?

Instinctively, without stopping to think, I reached out and grabbed her, pulling her into my arms and kicking the door shut behind us. It took her a few seconds before she reached up, and carefully placed her hands on my shoulders.

"Jesus Bella, you have absolutely no idea how goddamned worried I've been." I kissed the side of her head, holding her tighter, and inhaling the strawberry scent that came off of her. "What happened? Why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling well?"

She didn't answer. I pulled her away slightly so that I could look at her. Her eyes looked glassy.

"Why did you leave without me Bella? I would've picked you up from the doctor's and brought you home," I reproached.

She stared at me blankly for a couple of seconds, as if she hadn't heard my question, and then abruptly pulled away and walked slowly towards the living room, stopping in front of the Norway Spruce Christmas tree that she, Maddie and I had decorated together. The leaves that Maddie and Charlie collected in Forks over Thanksgiving weekend were part of the decorations, as well as the seashells Maddie and I collected at LaPush; all lay scattered about on various branches. The one that I'd given Bella had its own special branch up towards the top of the tree, carefully tied in a thin shiny gold ribbon and hanging proudly

Bella criss-crossed her arms against her stomach before reaching up and tracing the seashell carefully.

When she answered, her voice was low and hoarse. "I had to…I had to leave right away."

"Bella, I would've brought you home, no matter what time of day it was. You _know_ that. You shouldn't have been commuting by yourself if you weren't feeling well." I walked over to her again and wrapped my arms around her waist, something inside me jumping warily when I thought I felt her stiffen. She dropped her head forward. "Come on," I said, placing a kiss on the back of her neck, "let's get you in bed and see if we can get you feeling better by tomorrow morn-"

"Edward," she said, in a voice so low I had to strain to hear her, "I don't think it's a good idea for us to go up to Long Island tomorrow."

I tugged her gently by her waist, trying to guide her to the bedroom, but she held her ground firmly. I kissed the back of her neck again, feeling her shudder, but something about it felt off; different from the way she usually shuddered at my touch.

"We'll see how you feel in the morning love. If you're still not feeling well, we'll stay home. We can celebrate-"

She brought her hands up to mine and pulled them off of her, walking away again; this time she faced the large window overlooking the Chinese restaurant across the street. Ming's Dynasty, with its bright neon sign announcing it was open for Eat-in or Take-out. I could still picture her as she looked the first time she told me about that sign, that evening late last summer, standing outside Alice's balcony; like an angel in the fading twilight.

I swallowed and took a couple of steps towards her again. This time, I kept my hands at my sides.

"No Edward. We're not going. It's just…I can't. I don't think I'm ready. I just…I can't do it."

I furrowed my brow.

"Of course we're ready Bella, the presents are all packed. You packed for Maddie already last night, and I can help you finish packing your things if you're not feeling well enough tonight. I'm sure Alice wouldn't mind dropping by to help pick out your outfits-"

"No…Edward," she repeated unsteadily, but with more force than before. "We're not going."

I frowned deeply. I'd been looking forward to this weekend for so many reasons; to spend Christmas together with her and Maddie and the rest of my family, to get her and Maddie out of the city and far away from Paul, to talk to her about everything that'd been happening for the past couple of weeks.

To ask her to be my wife, and to let me be Maddie's father...

I sighed heavily and reached out to put one hand on her shoulder. She shuddered again, skittishly. Something about the motion put me on edge.

"Well, uhm…we can stay in the city then, if you'd prefer. Either here or at my place. I can make us dinner if you're not feeling well. And if you feel better we can go out to eat at a nice restaurant tomorrow night. We can take Maddie ice-skating again…"

She turned around then and her eyes met mine; dark, patient, waiting.

I stared at her, my heart suddenly racing in my chest.

"When you say…" – I swallowed – "when you say 'we're not going'…"

"I mean myself…and Maddie."

I kept staring, but abruptly, the scene before me changed.

Bella standing before me with bloodshot eyes and wild hair, the words coming out of her mouth, the white flakes of snow now falling slowly outside in the cold, the sparkling tree full of Maddie's leaves and seashells - all of it became part of a surreal dream; an alternate reality I was watching, but couldn't _possibly_ be a part of.

"Edward…I need some time…"

I narrowed my eyes. "Time? Time for what exactly?" My mouth formed the words mechanically, because my mind was still struggling to understand the scene before me.

"I…" – she took a deep breath – "This isn't what I had in mind for myself or Maddie when I came to New York. I'm not sure if it's what I want…or what I need at this point in my life."

Her words tore through me like a jagged-edge sword. The surrealism of the dream increased. And the words falling out of my mouth no longer felt like my own.

"You're not sure if it's what you want? When exactly did this revelation hit you, Bella? Because I can swear it was just last night that you were lying in my arms telling me you loved me with all your heart and soul."

"I do love you Edward," she admitted. "I can't deny that. I'm just not sure that it's the…forever kind of love."

The sword twisted painfully in my heart, tearing through every ventricle, every artery. I took a step back to steady myself, blowing out a large gust of air through narrowed lips. I couldn't even summon enough strength to respond.

"These past few months with you Edward, have been great. You've been so good to me and my daughter-"

"Don't fucking do that!" I hissed, recovering myself. "Don't thank me for loving you and Maddie like I'm some random fucking stranger on the subway that you're thanking for some bullshit kindness. And don't ever refer to Maddie as _your daughter_ when you're speaking to me! You did that once to me before. _Don't. Do it. Again."_

I felt as if I were watching some horrible movie, because the two people in this room having this fucked up conversation couldn't possibly be Bella and me.

Bella swallowed. "The point is Edward, I need time to sort this out, to figure out where this is all headed."

"To sort this out?" I asked incredulously. "So the other night out on the terrace, when you were offering me time to sort myself out, all along it was really you who needed it?"

She just stared at me again, her brown eyes emptier than I'd ever seen them.

I snorted. "And don't stand there and tell me you don't know where this is headed," I said roughly, pointing an angry finger at her, "because you know _exactly_ where that is!"

I thought of the ring still resting carefully on the inside of my waistcoat pocket. It felt like it was burning me now, leaving a scorching trail of agony tearing through my shirt, seeping into my heart. I took a step closer to her. She took a step back, her back a couple of inches off of the wall. I put one palm against the wall on either side of her.

"This _is_ the forever kind of love for _me_, and you _know_ that. I _never_ pretended it was anything less. I never played games with you Bella." I searched her eyes. She held my gaze for two seconds before dropping her head. I lifted her chin up with my thumb and forefinger.

"Look at me Bella," I demanded. Her eyes jumped from one side of me to the other.

"Look at me, _damn it_!"

Finally, she let her eyes meet mine. I looked inside those eyes that had captivated me from the first moment I saw her; chocolate eyes that had always held so many secrets; secrets she'd slowly shared with me one by one over the past few months.

But now, her eyes were like two hard, impenetrable walls, holding secrets she no longer wanted to share.

"What's going on here? What are you hiding?"

Her eyes grew wide. With my hand still on her chin, she shook her head slowly from side to side. "I'm not hiding anything Edward. I just need time to think. _Please_," she choked.

Something in those walls she'd rebuilt sometime between this morning and now cracked for a split second. "I just need…just give me the weekend to figure out what to do. I know its Christmas weekend. I know its horrible timing, but _please_" – she brought her hands up to her head, grasping at her hair wildly. In the back of my mind, I vaguely thought how now I could see why her hair was in the shape it was in. – "Just give me a couple of days to sort myself out. To decide-"

"To decide _what_?" I yelled, slamming the wall on either side of her with the palms of my hands, trapping her between my arms again. "To decide whether you want me or not? No Bella!"

She looked at me incredulously. "No?"

"No!" I repeated. "You tell me _right_ here and _right_ now whether you want me, because I'm not playing this game with you!"

She glared at me indignantly. "That's not fair!" she spat. "The other day you asked me for time and I gave it to you without hesitation Edward! You said there were things you needed to tell me, but you wanted to wait until this weekend. And I agreed, didn't I? I agreed right away!"

"Fine! You want to know what's been bothering me? I'll tell you. I'll tell you _everything _Bella-"

"No Edward," she said in a resigned voice. "You're missing the point. It doesn't matter anymore what you were going to tell me."

"Of course it does!"

"No!" she yelled, pulling her hair again. "Remember how you said you felt as if your head were about to explode? Well that's how I feel right now Edward!" she screeched in a strangled voice. "I feel like my _whole body's_ about to explode! So why can't you-"

"I wasn't trying to break up with you Bella! I wasn't telling you I didn't want you! I wasn't telling you I needed time-" – My voice cracked. I had to stop for a couple of seconds. – "that I needed time away from you."

"Please Edward," she begged again, placing her hands up against the wall behind her, as if she were trying to keep them as far away from me as possible. "Please. I just want to do what's best for everyone. For you, for me, for Maddie-"

"You think I don't want what's best for Madidie? You think I don't love her-" – Again, I had to stop. I brought one hand away from the wall and pressed down on each eye with my thumb and forefinger, trying desperately to stay under some sort of control – "You think I don't love her as much as you do? There is no difference between what I feel for her, and what you do. You can't take her away from me Bella. I _won't_ allow it."

A small whimper escaped her lips. For a split second, something in her eyes changed, and I thought I saw a brief wave of agony wash over her.

But when she spoke, her voice was carefully composed again. "If you love her like you say you do, then you understand that growing up in the public eye is not the ideal situation for her."

"I've told you that won't last forever." But even as I said it, I thought of the goddamned lawsuit, and all the fucking media attention that would bring with it.

She crossed her arms in front of herself. "How do you think I felt yesterday, opening the paper and finding a picture of _my dau_-" – I narrowed my eyes at her – "of _Maddie_," she revised, "on fucking Page Six of all pages? A picture of a moment that should've only belonged to you and me, and to those of us who truly know her and love her, in full color for all the world to see?"

I hung my head. "That won't last Bella."

"Can you guarantee that?"

I didn't answer. I couldn't. Not with the fucking lawsuit looming.

"All this craziness with the media…everyone's attention focused on Maddie and you and me…this is _exactly_ what I didn't want; why I left Forks in the first place. It's just been more than I imagined it would be. And I…I hadn't figured in how this would affect Maddie. Do you think it's fair to ask her to grow up with a camera pointed at her face all the time?"

"Bella…" But nothing else came out. My body shook, my limbs felt numb and heavy.

"I've got to think of what's best for Maddie, Edward, above _everyone_ else. And I'm just not sure that…being here is best for her, or for _me_ for that matter. I…I don't know who I am anymore Edward. I feel like I've lost myself in you, in this relationship. Everything's just happened so fast and-"

I looked up and cut her off. "We can slow it down. If you want…" - I swallowed thickly; my mind swimming, the ring in my waistcoat pocket growing heavier and heavier – "if you need to take a step, a few steps back, we can do that."

I realized I was begging, but I was past caring. I was fighting for my life at this point.

For a long time, neither one of us said anything. In the silence surrounding us I could hear her ragged breaths, I could see the way they came out in short, uneven spurts, her chest heaving up and down. I could feel the heat of her on my face. My nostrils filled with the sweet scent that came off of her skin.

She filled every single one of my senses, and I knew no matter what, there would never be a time when that wasn't the case.

"Please Edward," she said again, but her voice had no inflection, no emotion when she said it. "These past few weeks have been crazy for the both of us. Let's just take a breather."

"I don't _want_ a breather."

"But _I_ do."

How could I deny her? How could I stand here and tell her she had no right to breathe without me, if that's what she wanted, just because I couldn't imagine taking a breath that didn't include her and Maddie as parts of my life; the most important parts of my life?

I gazed into her eyes. This time, she didn't try to look away, and nowhere in them could I see a contradiction to what she was saying.

My legs felt weak, as if they'd give out on me at any moment.

But then something flickered behind her eyes again, for just a split-second, like before.

I couldn't take it anymore. The pain and confusion was too much, all the pressure from the past few days. Without any warning it all gave way to anger, a deep fury I couldn't hold back any longer.

I glared at her and grabbed her face between my hands. Her eyes grew wide.

"You don't know if you want me Bella? Is that what you're telling me?" I hissed. I pulled her face closer to mine. She tried to resist but I held her firmly and brought my mouth over hers. There was nothing sweet or gentle about the way I kissed her. It was rough. It was angry. It was insistent. I kept her head still as she struggled against me.

"Stop," I growled into her mouth, forcing my tongue between her lips. She brought her hands up against my chest to push me away. I didn't move an inch.

And then her hands were in my hair, pulling hard. At first I thought she was still trying to push me away, but then her tongue met mine, and she kissed me back as roughly as I was kissing her.

We slammed frantically against the wall, hands suddenly moving everywhere at once. Her hands continued pulling at my hair, so hard I saw blinding lights behind my lids, and then they trailed down to my shoulders, where she dug her fingers in. My hands moved down, gripping at anything, curling my fingers around her sides, grabbing her breasts roughly between my palms. A fleeting wave of exhilaration hit me when she arched her body into my hands, and then I grabbed her hips and pulled them flush against me. She moaned into my mouth, and as terrified as I was, as much as I knew this was _so_ wrong, this wasn't what she and I were about, it made me hard. I dug my hardness into her even more savagely. But she didn't push me away. Instead, she pressed herself into it, moving against me, nails digging into my shoulders, trailing down to my backside, to my hips and pulling me deeper into her. Lips and teeth clashed against each other, licking, biting. The taste of her desperation mingled with my own; fear and despondency were in every touch, in every pull, in every taste.

"You're _mine_. You'll _always_ be mine," I growled, burying my face under her neck, hating the animal in my voice and in my actions. But she didn't deny it; she didn't deny _me_. I sucked and nipped hard on her pale skin, digging five insistent fingers on either side of her hips. And the whole time I knew how much I'd regret this; how much I'd regret marking her - because her creamy skin _would_ bruise - like a wild animal marking its territory.

But I couldn't stop. Jesus, I _couldn't_ let her go. I couldn't back away from her, not when the electric hum that was always there between us burned me like this; not when her hands and mouth moved as frantically over my skin as mine moved over hers. Not when she was devouring me with the same urgency I devoured her. This was a dream; a nightmare; surreal, and I had _no idea_ how to wake up. Because this wasn't me. This wasn't Bella. These were two people in the grips of terror; beyond desperate, completely lost.

My cell phone vibrated loudly, and like a cold bucket of ice water thrown in the face of a sleepwalker, it woke me up. I drew in a sharp breath and backed away from Bella, blinking wildly. Her eyes grew wide, as if she'd just woken up too, and then she crossed her arms over her stomach and dropped her eyes to the floor.

I stood there panting, trying to regain control of myself while I figure out what had just happened. And my cell phone kept vibrating. After about twenty seconds, I remembered where I'd originally been headed early this afternoon. Keeping my eyes on Bella, who refused to look at me now, I pulled out my phone.

It was Demetri.

"Yes?" I panted into the phone.

"Mr. Cullen, I waited for you but you never showed up. Mr. Forrester returned to the hotel a while ago. He checked out and hopped in a cab. I followed him to the airport where he checked in for a flight back to Seattle."

Despite the torment brewing in my mind at the moment, I could still appreciate the meaning of Demetri's news.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm going to stay here until his flight leaves, but yes, I'm sure he's on it."

And again, despite my agony, I still breathed an involuntary sigh of relief. No matter what, my main priority would always be Bella and Maddie's safety.

"Call me back when you're sure."

"Yes."

I hung up.

I'm not sure how long Bella and I just stood there, facing each other, unmoving.

Time becomes immeasurable when you realize you're frozen.

The orange glow of light streaming through the window blinds was the only signs that the short winter day was coming to an end; a reminder that the city, the world continued revolving.

Everyone and everything continued, even as my life came to a halting standstill.

"Bella, I'm so unbelievably sorry-"

"Edward, I think it's best for you to leave now. Please, just respect my wishes and give me some time."

"But this weekend's Christmas Bella. And Maddie…" I couldn't finish.

"I'm sorry Edward." Her voice shook, and then she started crying. "I'm sorry."

I stood there helplessly for a moment longer, numbing to my pain, and hers. Then I turned around and left.

OOOOOOOOOO

I had no idea how I made it back to my apartment. Maybe I walked. Maybe I took the subway. Most probably I took a cab. I didn't know. All I knew was that somehow I'd made it back to my place, and was now leaning up against my door. I looked around in the dark and let out a slow, ragged breath, unconsciously sinking to the floor, my back trailing silently along the door as I went. I pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my forehead against them. My lungs felt painfully tight, constricted, as if some imaginary hand were crushing them between its thick, heavy fingers. For a long time, I sat there, waiting for some sort of release, something; _anything_. Because anything had to be better than the nothingness I was sinking into, the ice cold chill crawling through my veins, seeping into my hands, my feet, freezing my heart. So I sat, unable to move, unable to fully grasp what had just happened.

I repeated Bella's words in my head, trying to make sense of them; turning them over from side to side in my confused mind.

_Please, just respect my wishes and give me some time._

Time.

She needed time. Time for what exactly? How had we gotten here? This morning she'd kissed me softly as we each headed to our office. She'd looked as excited about this weekend as I'd been.

And Maddie.

A low moan erupted from my chest, unbearable pain twisting my heart into knots. I cringed in agony.

'_Edwood, does Santa go to Long Island?' she'd asked me across the table this morning, her top lip covered in milk._

"_Of course he does princess," I'd chuckled. "Don't worry. He'll bring your presents over there."_

_She'd looked at me thoughtfully. "Is it okay if I ask him fo-uh something that I fowgot to tell mommy to put in my lettuh?"_

"_What's that?" I'd asked her curiously._

_Her small mouth had turned up in a huge grin, her big brown eyes sparkling mischievously. "It's a supwise!" she'd giggled._

Would I ever know what that had been now?

'_I love you Edwood,' she'd said, as Bella and I had taken her into her babysitter's house just this morning. Her charm bracelet jiggled like small Christmas bells around her wrist. She hadn't taken it off since I'd given it to her. 'I'll see you latuh.'_

'_I love you too princess. See you later,' I'd responded, placing a kiss on the top of her head._

I thrust my hands up into my hair and fisted it – pulling hard. Pain shot through my scalp. A thousand points of light danced in my vision. I welcomed it. It grounded me and helped me focus.

Everything had been fine this morning. What had happened between then and this afternoon for Bella to decide she needed time?

"_Please_ _Edward. I just want to do what's best for everyone. For you, for me, for Maddie…"_

"_Please_ _Edward. I just want to do what's best for everyone. For you, for me, for Maddie…"_

"_Please_ _Edward. I just want to do what's best for everyone. For you, for me, for Maddie…"_

I shivered. My head resting on my legs, I closed my eyes and let the misery take me away.

OOOOOOOOOO

An hour.

Two hours.

Three.

Four.

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. My body ached from falling asleep on the floor, in this position. I ignored the pain and my phone, and kept my head down over my knees.

The ringing continued. The sudden thought that it might be Bella; that perhaps she changed her mind about needing time raced through my mind, and in two seconds I was at the phone, ignoring the pain that shot through the muscles in my neck and limbs as I ran.

It wasn't Bella.

For a long time I stared at the phone before answering it.

"What do you want?" I asked in a dead voice when I picked up.

"There you are!" Alice cried. "I've been calling and calling at Bella's place. I thought you guys were going to stay there tonight?"

I didn't answer her.

"Why'd you go to the city?" she asked.

"What do you want Alice?" I asked again.

"Jeez, Grinchy much?" she giggled. "I think you've watched that movie one too many times with Maddie." When I still didn't answer, she huffed impatiently. "Fine, fine. What time are we all leaving tomorrow morning?"

It took me a few seconds to respond. "We're not going up to Long Island."

"What? Why?"

I didn't answer. I couldn't.

"Oh, _I_ know." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "You want to propose in the city. I can't blame you. It _is_ much more romantic than Long Island."

My sister had no idea how much deeper she was digging the sword currently residing in my heart.

"She's there? You can't answer?" she whispered, giggling. When I still didn't say anything, she went on, the way only Alice could carry on a conversation all by herself. It made things a lot easier for me at the moment.

"Oh alright then. I'll let mom and everyone else know not to expect you guys. They'll be disappointed, but I'm sure once they hear the good news, they'll understand. I'll speak to you guys after the weekend!" she giggled excitedly. "Bye Edward. Merry Christmas!"

"Bye Alice."

I stared at the phone after we hung up, the numbness from earlier returning. My eyes fell on the answering machine, its red light blinking on and off insistently. Robotically, I pressed the play button, a random assortment of messages replayed themselves; only two held any of my attention.

'_Mr. Cullen, it is Demetri. You did not answer your cell phone. Mr. Forrester's flight took off and he is indeed on his way back to Washington. Please let me know how you would like me to proceed. My preference is to follow him back over there, to see if I can find out what he was up to while he was here, but you'll have to let me know. In the meantime, I am headed back to the Denali Hotel. The head of housekeeping was kind enough to promise to leave Mr. Forrester's room alone until I could take a look at it. I realize there's a holiday coming up, so if you can please return my call as soon as possible, I'd appreciate it.'_

_Beep._

'_Edward, it's your uncle. Call me back when you get this.'_

The night passed by slowly. I memorized every mark, every imperfection on my ceiling and walls. I remembered being cold, but that was all I could remember the next morning.

I didn't leave the apartment that morning, Christmas Eve. The lack of voices overwhelmed me. The brightness pouring in from the windows burned my eyes. This wasn't how this day was supposed to start. The absence of small, excited feet running back and forth played tricks with my mind. I kept hearing _her_, her child-like giggles; her soft, sweet voice. At some point I found myself standing at the door to the guest room; imagining what it would've looked like painted in Maddie's favorite colors; with a pretty pink canopy bed in the middle of the room, instead of the black four-poster guest bed I'd never gotten around to changing. Right before I closed the door, something under the bed caught my attention. I walked over and bent down, pulling the item out.

It was Angie, Maddie's little ballerina doll. She must've dropped her here a couple of nights ago, a night that already seemed like ages ago.

I held the doll close to me and lowered my head, watching vacantly as small, wet drops fell over Angie's head.

The phone rang again that night, and after confirming that it wasn't Bella, I let my attention turn back to the TV - blindly watching as George's guardian angel showed him what life would've been like had he never been born - and let it go to voicemail.

'_Edward, it's your uncle again. I've got some good news for you regarding that Lauren situation. Call me back and I'll tell you aaalll about it. Merry Christmas godson, and give that pretty girlfriend of yours and her little girl a kiss from Uncle Aro." He chuckled before hanging up._

At about eleven, I put on a pair of sweats, threw a sweatshirt on over my tee, and took the elevator down to the lobby. Brilliant lights were placed elegantly all around the perimeter of the ground floor, a seven foot tree stood majestically at one corner, expensive crystal balls of white and gold were placed strategically all around, very unlike the way Maddie and I had decorated their tree back in Brooklyn.

The doorman on duty was bundled warmly in his long wool coat and cap, sitting by the desk with a small TV on.

'_Daddy, teacher says, every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings.'_

'_That's right Zuzu…'_

I cringed, my heart contracting painfully.

"Going for a run Mr. Cullen?"

I nodded and made my way to the door.

"Merry Christmas!" the doorman called out behind me.

Large snowflakes fell insistently from the dark sky as I crossed over to the park, covering the pavement with white, glistening powder. The bare trees were already sparkling, and the dry winter lawn was hidden under a thin sheen of Christmas snow. It was rare around here for it to snow on Christmas Eve, and my mind went to an evening just a few weeks ago, walking down the Brooklyn Promenade with Bella and Maddie, playing in the snow.

I shook my head and ran, ran from my thoughts, ran from the sound of Bella's voice telling me she needed time; ran from Maddie's big brown eyes and sweet laughter, ran from the pain clutching at me, ran from the platinum ring still in my waistcoat upstairs. I pulled my hood up and lowered my head, letting my feet hit the pavement rigidly, the sound distorted by the slushy substance on the ground. But no matter how far or how fast I ran, I couldn't outrun the pain, or _their_ voices, or the random memories that circled my mind.

'_I left my Angie dolly in theugh. Can I peez have huh back? I miss huh.'_

_Bella's flushed face the first time I met her. 'How do you do?'_

_The warmth of Maddie's little arms the first time she threw them around my neck._

_Bella standing on Alice's balcony, that late summer evening._

'_Edwood, did you come to play with me?'_

'_I love you Edwood.'_

'_I love you Edward, with all my heart and soul. Always remember that.'_

I stopped. The cold winter air nipped at my face, stinging my cheeks. My breath swirled in front of me, warming my nose as I panted, out of breath from exertion. Wet flakes fell on my face, melting into moisture and running down my cheeks. The black night framed everything, making the muted colors of the night stand out even more. Every muscle in my legs felt sore from the pace of my run. My chest ached from the cold air I inhaled. My abs burned, tight and hard.

But in the quiet of the night, in the dark, almost empty park, my mind was _finally_ focused…

'_I love you Edward, with all my heart and soul. Always remember that.'_

Always remember that.

Always.

Always.

When _had_ I forgotten that?

_Why_ had I forgotten that?

After all the times Bella had told me she loved me, after all the ways she'd shown me, how could I have let one word break my faith in her love?

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cell phone.

The hell with space and time. Bella loved me. I _knew_ this; I knew it like I knew my own name, like I knew one plus one equaled two. Like I knew the Christmas snow falling heavily around me meant so much more than just wet precipitation.

Whatever else was going on, whatever else was happening, was secondary to that fact. Bella loved me, and I loved her and Maddie. And I'd be damned if I let anything come between us.

I needed Bella, now.

I needed my daughter.

I wasn't giving them up.

But then the fucking answering machine picked up.

I groaned into the darkness, and ran both hands through my hair, my feet moving of their own accord through the thickening snow. And though I knew it was wrong, I turned on the tracking device again. I had to know where they were.

I ran now with a purpose, temporarily ignoring the pain in my limbs, the large, heavy flakes of snow distorting my vision, the glowing winter scenery of snow covered trees and bridges and lakes, the sound of separate footsteps in the distance, light and unsure, the muffled sound of a child calling for her father.

But the GPS shocked me, and all of a sudden, the child's muffled voice was _so_ familiar.

"Daddy, Daddy!"

When I looked up, my daughter was running towards me, the same way she ran the first time I saw her, the day I became a father.

Her arms were outstretched, her small face glowing brightly, and when she landed in my arms, she wrapped herself around me.

"Daddy! I missed you daddy! I missed you so much!"

Tears mixed with the snowflakes running down my face, but I couldn't have cared less.

"I missed you too Maddie baby. I missed you too."

I held her small face between my hands and kissed both her cheeks. She smiled at me happily.

"Daddy loves you princess. I love you so much."

"I love you too Daddy." She buried her soft face into my neck.

I held her tightly to me, and when I looked up, Bella was there, watching with tears streaming down her face, a few short feet away. The wind blew at her long, dark hair, the moonlight shining down on it making it glimmer like spooled threads of silk. The snow falling around her surrounded her in its milky glow and illuminated her creamy skin. She looked like an ethereal vision. But she was really there.

She moved towards us slowly. When she reached my side, she put one hand on my shoulder, and looked up at me through apologetic eyes.

"You're all she wanted for Christmas," she said in a strangled whisper. "Her daddy. That's all she said she wanted. And I…" – she started crying – "I couldn't deny her. I'm sorry Edward. I wanted to do what was right. But I can't do this. I can't." She lowered her gaze to the white ground below us.

I swallowed hard, my throat aching, and cupped her chin in my hand, bringing her eyes back to mine.

"You can't do what Bella?"

She bit her lip. I pulled it out from between her teeth, tracing her lips with one finger. They felt so soft and warm despite the frigid temperature. She closed her eyes and sighed.

"You can't do what?" I whispered.

She opened her eyes back up and drew in a deep breath. "I can't take you away from her." She sighed heavily. "I can't take you…away from me."

With Maddie still wrapped around me, I lowered my head and placed a soft, lingering kiss on Bella's lips. She took my bottom lip in between hers, pulling on it gently.

"Please don't ever try again," I said, pulling away.

She smiled and shook her head. "I won't. I can't," she shrugged. Then she took another deep breath. "We have to talk."

I nodded. "Yes, we do."

Maddie lifted her head up, the chocolate eyes she got from her mother sparkling anxiously.

"Daddy, mommy says it's almost Chwismas. Can we go home now?"

I chuckled. She got her impatience from _me_ though.

I kissed her forehead and rested mine on hers.

"Yes princess. We're going home now."

She nestled her head between my neck and shoulder, and hummed contentedly. I reached out one hand towards Bella. She looked down at it and placed hers inside, curling her fingers around mine with a firm conviction that traveled all the way up my arm, warming me all over.

Together, the three of us walked back to our apartment, guided by the light of the falling snow.

In the back of my mind, I remembered thinking once that the day Maddie outgrew calling me 'Edwood' would be a sad day indeed.

Turns out, it was everything but.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews are almost as nice as a white NYC Christmas... **

**If you didn't listen to 'Escape' while reading this chapter, go listen to it now, even if you don't have the hots for Enrique the way I do (the song just happens to fit this chapter to a tee).**

**In case anyone missed it, some parallels to New Moon were drawn here.**

**Let me know what you're thinking.**

**Ass-kicking coming up next chapter.**


	35. Chapter 34 The Meaning of it All

**There should be one more chapter after this, and then the Epilogues, which will be from different POVs and cover different time spans. You'll understand once you read them.**

**Just a few things I'd like to address from the last chapter.**

**The ending was NOT a dream. It DID happen. I received a few reviews from readers who were scared it was just a dream. It was as real as a scene in fanfiction can get, I suppose. **

**Another thing was a couple of people were surprised (and feared it was just a dream) because Maddie called Edward 'daddy' seemingly out of the blue. If you go back, you'll see she's been asking questions about families and daddies for a couple of chapters, so the whole 'daddy' thing was on her little mind. At some point her mind just made the connection; Edwood is my daddy. Luckily the connection came at just the right time.**

**And finally, I laughed when a few of you confessed to reading the end of the chapter first, breathing a sigh of relief, and then going back to read the rest of it. That's just fine with me. I do that myself plenty of times in books.**

**See? I told you to trust me.**

**Finally, I posted the first two chapters of my **_**new**_** story, 'If We Ever Meet Again,' last week. Go give that a try if you'd like. I should be posting the next chapter to that one tomorrow.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a little bit longer…**

* * *

**Ch. 34 – The Meaning of it All**

**Chapter Song Rec: **_**100 Years**_** by Five for Fighting**

**BPOV**

An old, dried up piece of scrambled eggs lay over the plastic table, shriveled and brown; red stains that I assumed were ketchup surrounded the crusty edges. I caught a whiff of its sharp, putrid odor and it made my stomach churn. The once-white-but-now-questionably-so plastic table was streaked with water stains, as if someone had just sponged it down, but all it had done was left behind the stench of dirty sponge and grimy water. I held my breath. With one gloved hand, I flicked the scrambled egg piece away; it landed on the plastic bench across from me. I exhaled.

The chiming of the door opening behind me made me jump, but I resisted the urge to turn around. The wind that blew in with the opening of the door sent the scent of expensive perfume - completely out of place in this diner - wafting my way. Unfortunately, it had gotten to the point where I'd recognize that disgusting scent anywhere. I tightened my coat around me and drew in a deep breath to steady myself, crossing my gloved hands over the table.

"Bella dahling," I heard behind me, before Tanya came into view. She moved slowly and elegantly to the bench opposite me, smiling down wryly, huge dark sunglasses covering her cold eyes. "Talk about waiting to the last minute," she snorted, removing her sunglasses and her leather gloves one finger at a time. "I was beginning to think you weren't going to call."

I stared at her, but didn't answer. She snorted again and sat down, slinking over to the middle of the booth, where the piece of scrambled egg had landed. I bit my lip.

"You said I had until Monday morning," I reminded her, while she adjusted her long fur coat tightly around herself.

"Yes dahling, that I did. I was pleasantly surprised to hear from you last night. I know Lauren was getting ready to file the papers first thing this morning. But once you called, I convinced her to hold off, until you and I chatted."

"Thank you," I breathed.

"You're very welcome Bella."

The same tired waitress that had taken my order last time dragged her feet towards us, with the same aggravated and exhausted look she'd been wearing a few days ago. Again, I ordered a cup of black coffee.

"Do you have sparkling water dahling?" Tanya asked her. The waitress looked down at her like she had three heads.

"Oh never mind," Tanya snarled. "Just bring me something in a can or a bottle, that hasn't been infected by this place." Then she waved her away with one hand.

The waitress glared at her as if she wanted to curse her out, but then just shrugged and stomped away. The bitter part of me hoped she'd spit in her drink before she brought it out.

Tanya turned her attention back to me. "So how was your Christmas Bella? You and Edward were surprisingly absent from Page Six this morning." Half of her botoxed mouth turned up.

"Cut the small talk Tanya," I hissed. "You and I are here for one thing and one thing only, and there's no reason to pretend we're here for anything else."

Her half-grin widened. She sat up straighter, crossing her hands over the table much like I had mine. Anyone walking by would think we were conducting some sort of business transaction. Which I supposed, we kind of were.

"Alright then Bella. Let's get right to it. What have you decided?"

I inhaled deeply, my blood pounding loudly between my ears.

"You know what I've decided. How could I possibly make any other decision?"

This time her whole mouth turned up in a grin.

"But I need some assurances Tanya. I need to be certain that Lauren will _never_ file that suit. And that…Paul will never say anything either."

She sat back against the booth and studied me. "I told you Bella, we will be each other's assurances. As long as you stay away, that lawsuit will never see the light of day. If you come back…well, then the lawsuit returns."

I shook my head. "No. That's not enough. How do I know you and Lauren won't decide to file this a few years down the line, because by then it won't make any difference whether I come back or not. Edward will have moved on. He won't want me anymore even if I do return. Then you and Lauren will have gotten me out of his life, _and_ ruined him with this lawsuit."

Tanya pursed her lips and huffed impatiently. "Bella dahling, I promise you that's not how this will work."

I glared at her.

She sighed and leaned in closer. "Look, do you really think I want to see Edward hurt by something like this? I care about him dahling. I fucked him for over two years, of course some sort of feelings will have popped up," she chuckled. She straightened herself up again. "Bella, do you remember what I told you a few days ago?"

"You told me a lot of things," I answered dryly, my voice trembling.

She chuckled once. "Fine, I'll remind you. Bella, I have a…knack you can say, for knowing exactly what people want, even when they don't quite know it themselves. You see, Lauren thought she wanted revenge for being kicked to the curb once you came along-"

"That's not what happened-" I hissed.

"Bella we've already gone through this," Tanya said in an exasperated tone. "I told you, it doesn't matter what happened and what didn't, what matters is what the public will think, what they'll believe to be the truth."

Tears stung my eyes again, even though I'd thought I was beyond tears at this point.

Tanya saw my reaction, and reached out one hand to pat mine. "There, there dahling. It'll be okay."

I removed my hand from under hers, and shuddered.

She smirked. "Anyway, the point is Bella, I've offered Lauren enough of what she _really_ wants, to make sure she gets rid of this suit - as long as you do what _you're_ supposed to do."

"And how do you know she'll stick to _your_ bargain?"

"Because I'm not stupid dahling. I've got my own personal assurances, which you don't need to know about, to make sure she sticks to her part of the bargain."

"And Paul?"

She raised an eyebrow and leaned back again. "That hunky ex-husband of yours is definitely in the wrong career field," she laughed. "Someone with a gambling problem as huge as his shouldn't be working in a casino for God's sakes," she chuckled. She leaned over the table again. "As of this morning, Paul has enough money to pay off all of his debts. Unfortunately, if I know men like him, and trust me, I do," she smiled salaciously, "by this time tonight he'll be in debt all over again."

"Hush money then? Is that what you gave him?" I accused.

She eyed me carefully and shrugged. "If it makes you feel any better, he really did want you back. He had no idea about this whole business with Edward and Lauren, and I'm sure he'll take you back in an instant if you decide to give him a call when you get back to your little town," she added, as if she were offering me some sort of runner-up prize. "The money was just an assurance that he'd actually get on a plane and come looking for you. And in case you said no to him, which I gotta admit, I was pretty sure would be the case," she winked at me conspiratorially, "he also had to agree to be willing to sign the termination papers, if that's what it would've taken to get you out of here."

"I already told you," I said through clenched teeth, a tear of fury rolling down my cheek, "I'm not bargaining with my daughter. Paul may have been willing to sell her, but I'm not."

She rolled her eyes. "Yes dahling, I know, I know." She sighed. "I wouldn't worry too much about Paul, Bella. At the rate he's going, he won't be coherent enough to say much of anything in a few months anyway."

I felt a stab of pain at those words, not because of any lingering feelings I may have felt for my ex-husband, but because he'd once been important to me, and I couldn't help pitying him; pitying what his life had become.

I looked away from Tanya, down at my gloved hands, lacing my fingers tightly together to keep my hands from shaking. My breathing was hard and erratic, my heart clenched painfully.

I looked back at Tanya, searching her eyes, trying to find one iota of real feelings in them; even love for Edward would've been acceptable. Because if I could find that, if she really cared about Edward, even in her twisted, undeniably insane way, then maybe I could at least feel some of the same sort of pity for her that I'd just felt for Paul.

But there was nothing in her cool cerulean eyes. They were as frozen, as cold and empty as the clear winter sky outside this morning, blue and smooth, nothing marring it for as far as the eye could see.

"So it all comes down to money with you, doesn't it? Just throw money at everyone to get what you want?

"Am I supposed to deny that?" she chortled. "I've got the resources Bella, I might as well put some use to them."

"You know there are millions of people starving in the world, right?"

"I leave that to bleeding-heart philanthropists like your future ex-boyfriend's mother."

I flinched.

She rolled her eyes. "I don't need you to judge me Bella. Just tell me already, do we have a deal, or not?"

I glared at her, while another traitor tear fell. But I wasn't as cold and frozen as Tanya was. No matter what, tears would fall this morning.

"Maybe someday you'll learn Tanya, that you can't buy everyone. That these are people's feelings, and reputations, and lives that you're playing with." She rolled her eyes again. "There _are_ things in this world that you can't buy, not even you, with all your money."

"I bought _you_ a one way ticket out of this town, out of _my town_, didn't I?" she sneered.

For a long while, I just stared at her, her beautiful, perfect face, red immaculate curls framing her in just the right way. I searched her eyes once more, even as the little bell over the diner's door chimed again, and the cold wind blew in another scent, this one cleaner, purer; instantly relaxing my rigid shoulders and bringing an involuntarily smile to my lips. I wiped away my rogue tears.

Tanya frowned at my smile, and then she looked up and gasped.

"No Tanya, you didn't," Edward answered her, coming to sit next to me and placing a soft, gentle kiss on my lips.

"You okay?" he murmured quietly, resting his forehead on mine.

I smiled and nodded, lowering one of my hands from the table and gripping his hand tightly in mine.

Carlisle walked in behind Edward, and came to stand by our booth.

"What the hell is this?" Tanya spat, glaring from Edward, to me, and then to Carlisle.

"_This _is what happens Tanya, when you try to blackmail someone in our family," Carlisle answered her.

"I was just playing dahling," Tanya laughed, looking at Edward. "You know I would never really do something like that to you."

Edward's jaw clenched, his nostrils flared. "He wasn't talking about me," he said in a barely controlled voice, his lips barely moving. His hand tightened around mine.

Tanya jerked her head back, her lips twisting, and glared at Edward through furious eyes.

"Alright," she said in a voice much calmer than she looked, "You're all going to rally around America's little sweetheart here? I can easily wash my hands of this whole affair Edward, but then you know what will happen? Lauren will file that lawsuit this morning. That. Is not. A joke. Your little girlfriend here" – she waved an angry hand my way – "had it in her power to make it all go away, but she was too _selfish_" – she spat – "to make the right choice!"

"What was the right choice?" It was Carlisle that answered her. Edward looked like he was having a hard time staying in his seat. His hand tightened even more around mine, and I got the distinct feeling he was using it to keep himself grounded.

"Walking away from the man she loves and that loves her and her daughter with his entire being, because of some empty threat from you?"

"It is not an empty threat!" Tanya hissed venomously, sparing Carlisle a quick glance, but addressing her answer towards Edward. He continued to glare at her, half of his top lip curled up, his entire frame shaking in the seat next to me. With my free hand I reached up and caressed his arm soothingly. Tanya's eyes narrowed like a hawk.

"It _is_ an empty threat," Carlisle countered evenly.

Tanya turned her glare towards Carlisle. "What are you doing here? This is between me and Edward!"

Edward slammed the table with one hand, making us all jump. His eyes burned with fury.

"This should've been between you and me!" he growled. "You had a problem with _me_," he pounded his chest with two fingers, "you should've taken it up with _me_, not with Bella, you dirty, filthy-"

Tanya's eyes grew wide, and she jerked her head back as if she were afraid. I was momentarily afraid for her.

"Edward," I said in a soothing voice, caressing his arm, "Calm down babe."

"Edward," Carlisle said in a sterner tone.

Edward glared at Tanya, and then leaned back against his seat.

"Tanya, I'm here to support my son, and as such, it's me you will be dealing with this morning. Edward is here to support Bella. Do you see? _This_ is the way this family works. We support each other. What you did the other day, try to tag team Bella between yourself and her ex-husband, that was never going to work Tanya, because we are a family, and if you…_mess_ with one of us, you mess with us all."

Tanya was breathing hard. Her nostrils flared as she glared up at Carlisle.

"Your _family_ will regret-"

"The only thing my family regrets is the day you crossed one of our paths. But today we're taking care of that."

"What the hell-"

"This lawsuit threat is over Tanya. My brother-in-law Aro Volturi is sending a cease and desist letter to Ms. Mallory's attorney as we speak. You see, Aro and his firm took a better look at Ms. Mallory's previous employment history." Carlisle's voice was extremely cool and collected. "It appears this isn't the first time Ms. Mallory has threatened an employer with a sexual harassment lawsuit, once her job performance was questioned. The last time this happened, her employer threatened to countersue, which is exactly what Edward and my daughter-in-law Rosalie will be doing if Ms. Mallory tries to continue with this farce of a suit. And with all the evidence and first-person witnesses we have, Ms. Mallory's suit would be nothing more than an annoying joke."

Tanya looked as if she wanted to strangle Carlisle. Her hands curled into fists over the table.

"As for you Tanya," Carlisle continued, "starting today, you will stay away from Bella, and Edward or-"

"Or what?" she snarled. "That bullshit might take care of Lauren, but you can't touch me with it!"

Edward reached into my coat pocket and gingerly placed the tiny tape recorder that had been hidden in it on the table.

Tanya's blue eyes looked like they would bulge out of their sockets.

She snickered. "What the hell do you think you can do with that?"

Carlisle answered her, in the same cool, composed voice. "That, my dear, along with Mr. Forrester's hotel check-in records, and the slip of paper both of you used to come up with an agreeable price for this little mission, proves blackmail, bribery, extortion, intent to commit slander, libel and perjury-"

She chuckled and shook her head. "You know as well as I do dahling that none of that would hold up in court."

I tilted my head. "Maybe, maybe not. But, as you yourself told me a few days ago, it doesn't always matter whether something can be proven or not, what matters is what the public will believe."

She looked at me and laughed. "Do you really think I care what the fucking public says about me?" She snorted.

"Maybe _you_ don't," Carlisle answered, "but your father would."

Tanya's face fell.

"You forget I've met your father Tanya," Edward said, his voice cooler and slightly more controlled. "It only took a few minutes of talking to him to figure out that his hotel chain's stock price is pretty much the most important thing out there to him. And I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate any negative publicity that would threaten to devalue that price. What do you think it would do to his hotel's stock value if everyone knew that his daughter used his hotels to conduct her shady dealings, that she routinely comped criminals staying there? All of a sudden they wouldn't quite seem so much like the luxury millionaire retreats your father tries to sell them as, would they?"

For once Tanya was speechless. Her chest heaved heavily as she glowered between the three of us. Her eyes fell on the little tape recorder desperately.

"You're welcome to that copy if you want," Edward said dryly. "There's more where that came from."

"You little bitch!" she hissed my way.

Before I could react, Edward leaned into the table, bringing his face dangerously close to Tanya's. She gasped and banged the back of her head against the top of the bench as she tried to get as far away from Edward's menacing glare as she could.

"The only _bitch_ here is sitting _across_ the table from me." He spoke the words quietly, but somehow that made them sound all the more harsher. I pulled him gently by his arm and he sat back down.

"Tanya we're going to show you the same courtesy you showed Bella a few days ago. As long as you stay away from Edward and Bella and their daughter, we won't file any criminal charges against you. The second you step out of line, you, and your father, since he pays all your bills, _will_ be hearing from our attorneys."

Her blue eyes went wild, her breathing turned erratic, and her nostrils flared angrily. But she said nothing as she stared at Carlisle. She wouldn't even bring her eyes in Edward's or my direction any more.

"Now I believe we're done here?" Carlisle said casually, turning to Edward and me.

"Yes, we're done," Edward agreed, taking my hand and leading me out of the seat. Carlisle walked out ahead of us, and Edward started to guide me out with one hand firmly on the small of my back. A couple of feet away from the table I stopped. Edward turned to me with a frown.

"Give me a minute," I said.

He pursed his lips.

"One minute Edward."

He exhaled and nodded once. "One minute. And I'll be right here."

I smiled. "I know you will."

I walked back to the table where Tanya still sat, furious.

She looked up at me with a deep scowl.

"What do you want? To gloat? You think you won?"

"This was never about winning or losing Tanya. You threatened my family. You gave me no choice."

She snorted. "Your family? Do you really think they'll ever be your family?" She chuckled and flashed her eyes towards Edward. "You really think he'll marry you dahling?" She shook her head. "You _are_ just a game Bella. I tried to warn you but I guess you'll have to learn on your own. He _will_ get tired of you."

I stared at her.

"I came to add something to what Carlisle said."

She raised a perfectly-shaped eyebrow.

"Stay away from my _entire_ family," I amended slowly. She twisted her lips up in a snarl. "And by my entire family, I mean everyone here and everyone in Washington. Including Paul. He has enough problems without you adding to them."

She started laughing.

"I did learn one thing from you Tanya."

She lifted her brows. "Oh?" she chuckled.

"Sometimes, it does help to have a lot of money," –this stopped her fit of giggles - "and I suppose if it came down to it, I could have as much at my disposal as you do, as well as a team of bright, eager and loyal attorneys. And as much as I'd hate doing it, I would _not_ hesitate to use it all if I had to."

Her mouth fell open.

"That's all I wanted to add."

With that, I walked away.

OOOOOOOOOO

Edward and I were parked outside the airport later, in the passenger loading and unloading area. The thin strip was packed with cars full of post-Christmas travelers anxious to get back to jobs, schools and loved ones, scurrying quickly with their luggage through the thick, glass doors before disappearing into terminals.

In the back seat of the cab, I turned towards Edward, gripping his hand tightly in mine.

"I still wish you didn't have to go."

"But you know that I have to."

I nodded, because I did understand, even if I didn't like it.

Edward's eyes darkened. "He threatened my family Bella. You and Maddie. I can't just let that go. Not because I'm trying to prove anything, but because he needs to know that you and Maddie are not alone, that Maddie has a father to protect her, and that you have…" he paused, as if trying to find the right word, finally he settled on, "…me."

I cupped his face between my hands, and he put his hands over mine.

"It's just that…I'm worried Paul won't just sit there the way Tanya did," I admitted.

"I'm counting on that."

"Edward…"

He chuckled. "Look, you got Carlisle to come and keep me under control here, and Jake and the Chief will be waiting for me at the airport. Between the both of them, I think they can keep me from committing a capital crime."

I pursed my lips doubtfully. "Yeah, they probably can, but the question is, do they want to?"

He laughed. I rolled my eyes. "It's not funny Edward. When I spoke to them on the phone a little while ago they sounded more excited than Maddie did opening her presents yesterday morning. And you know that's saying a lot. I don't think keeping Paul alive is their main goal at the moment."

He stared at me with a small smile. "What?" he chuckled a little too innocently. "We're bonding."

I took a deep breath. "Edward please, just promise me you'll be careful." I brought myself closer to him until our knees were touching and I could feel the sweetness of his breath on my face as I tightened my hold around his.

"Promise you'll try your best to keep things from turning physical."

Edward smirked, and then sighed. With his hands still over mine, he laced his fingers between one hand and moved it slowly down towards his lips, kissing me softly on the palm.

"I promise love. I'll try my best to keep it from getting physical. I just want to talk to him Bella. The same talk we just had with Tanya. It's up to him how he takes it."

I bit my lip nervously, because I knew Paul. I was about to tell Edward that, but his expression suddenly turned remorseful, his green eyes filled with guilt.

He shook his head angrily, looking away. "If only I'd been honest with you from the beginning. Told you all about Demetri and Paul, and what Lauren said to Rosalie." He closed his eyes and exhaled reproachfully. "This was all my fault. When I think of what could've happened, how they got you alone and _threatened_ you," he said through clenched teeth. "Tanya is so goddamned lucky I've been ingrained to never hit a woman, because I swear to God, I've never wanted to do so as badly as I did today…"

I removed my hand from his and cupped his chin. "Look at me." He refused to open his eyes. "Edward, look at me." Slowly, he opened them, and inside his emerald eyes I could see the pain, the guilt he still carried.

"That's all behind us now Edward. Now it's time to focus on _us_. Please, I know you have this inborn desire to completely protect those you love; but you can't take the blame for this all on yourself. This was _both of us_ Edward," I said intently. "We both kept things from each other that had we shared, would've stopped things from spiraling the way they did. We both need to learn to communicate better."

He nodded, but I could tell from his expression he still shouldered most of the blame for himself.

"When _I_ think of how close _I_ came to making the wrong choice…to…" I closed my eyes and shuddered.

Suddenly Edward's arms were wrapped around me, and I felt his soft lips on mine. He kissed me tenderly, pulling my top lip between his, and then alternating with my bottom. We kissed like that for a couple of minutes.

"But you didn't, Bella," he finally murmured when I came up for air.

"I couldn't," I corrected.

He smiled his wonderfully crooked smile. "That's good enough for me."

"Hurry back," I said, kissing him once more.

"I'll be back by tomorrow evening. Give Maddie a big hug and kiss from me. Tell her daddy'll miss her, but I'll bring her back something nice."

I smiled. Over the past thirty-six hours or so, Edward and Maddie had exchanged the word 'daddy' in almost every sentence they spoke to each other.

"All she'll want back is her daddy Edward, you know that."

He smiled brilliantly, his eyes sparkling with warmth and happiness. For a second, a strange look crossed his features, a look he'd worn on and off for the past day or so. His lips twitched, and then he chuckled and shook his head.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, love."

"That's all I ask."

He got that look again, and then chuckled once more before stepping out of the car.

He retrieved his duffle from the back of the cab, and with one more wink towards me, walked in through the sliding glass doors. I watched his retreating form the entire way; the profile of his square jaw, his perfectly straight nose, his tall, lean stature, his confident, sure steps, his strong, wide shoulders, and his beautifully messy bronze hair waving wildly. I smiled to myself. So beautiful. So perfect, inside _and_ out.

And somehow, all mine.

OOOOOOOOOO

The cab dropped me off at the beautiful, white house overlooking the Long Island Sound. The sound stood frozen at the moment, and the light from the day's clear sun sparkled off the ice, casting a brilliant glimmer over the water, gold and yellow rays danced over the winter sky.

The Cullens were all gathered in the large family room, the majestic Christmas tree Esme had decorated so beautifully in hues of red and cream sparkled elegantly. The marble fire place was lit and gave of a comforting warmth.

"Mommy!" Maddie ran to meet me when she saw me enter the room, leaving behind the huge assortment of dolls, trains, costumes, and everything else the Cullens had gifted her with this weekend. At the moment, since we'd all been up pretty late last night, she was still in her red flannel Christmas nightgown. Her rich brown hair had been brushed smoothly though, until it was shining, and a pretty red ribbon held half of it up nicely.

"Your hair looks so pretty baby," I cooed, pulling her away to look at her.

"Nanny Esme bwushed it out fuh me this mowning. She says I got bootiful haiuh."

'Nanny Esme' had occurred sometime yesterday, and in her defense, Esme had carefully explained to me that if Edward was 'daddy' then didn't that automatically make her 'nanny?' I'd smiled and nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly with her logic. Maddie had never actually had a grandmother, and I'd no sooner take her away from her than I'd take her daddy away.

"Nanny Esme is right," I smiled at Maddie, stroking her long hair.

"Mommy, when's daddy coming back?" Maddie asked, her small mouth turning down sadly.

Daddy. The word had just popped out of her mouth Christmas Eve. Where's my daddy? Why isn't daddy with us? As if some sort of instinct had warned her that something was horribly wrong, and that it would be up to her to make it right. So she hadn't asked for Edward, or 'Edwood' for that matter; she'd asked for daddy, she'd _cried_ for daddy, and that's all it had taken to break me.

And once she'd tried the new title out, and seen how it lit up her father's eyes, how it re-molded him, she'd been quite liberal with it, to both Edward's and her own delight. But when I thought back, really, she'd been trying out the title in her own little head for a while now; asking questions about daddies and babies and families; Maddie had figured out what we were before I had. It had taken my daughter to show _me_ the way.

So Edward and I had explained to her last night that daddy had to go away for a couple of days, and when she'd started to pout and tear up - the antecedent to what had occurred Christmas Eve when I'd been stupid enough to try to tell her that she'd have to spend the holiday without Edward - Edward moved quickly to calm her down.

"No princess," he'd assured her, kneeling in front of her, "I won't be gone long. Daddy just has to take care of something. I'll only be gone one night."

"So before I go to bed on the second night," – she'd put up two small fingers in front of his face – "you'll be back?" she'd asked in a shaky voice.

"Yes, princess," he'd vowed solemnly.

"You pwomise daddy?" she'd asked, pouting, and Edward had promised instantly. At that moment I knew, Maddie had unwittingly found the look that would get her anything she wanted from her father for the rest of her life.

Now I tried to reassure her again, feeling a wave of guilt for being the cause of Maddie's small case of insecurity regarding her father. But I trusted Edward to be there for her, for _us_, for the rest of our future. Maddie's insecurity wouldn't last long.

"Daddy had to go away for one night, remember Maddie?" I said gently, stressing the 'one night.' "He'll be back before bedtime tomorrow. And we're going to wait for him in the City, in his apartment."

"Only one night, right?" she asked again. I nodded.

She smiled. "Okay. I'm going to dwess up like a faiwy pwincess when Daddy comes back! He said I have to be the pixie dust faiwy!" she giggled.

"Okay," I chuckled, not exactly sure what she was talking about. But she was happy. I was happy. I laughed and hugged her.

We all spent the rest of the afternoon together by the fire, laughing, talking; relieved the whole mess with Lauren was over, as well as most of the issue with Tanya and Paul.

"I swear to God Bella," Rosalie scowled, seated on Emmett's lap with her arms around his large neck, "If you would've taken Tanya's offer, I would've gotten on a plane to Washington and personally beat your ass."

Emmett snickered. "Babe, the baby. I keep reminding you, you can't kick ass with the baby inside you."

"The hell I can't," she snorted.

"Anyway, I would've come along and helped," Alice added from her fiancee's lap.

"Alice," Jasper warned jokingly.

"What? I would've," Alice confirmed.

I shook my head, smiling at their teasing, but grateful inside for their acceptance and affection.

"I couldn't have left," I said honestly, looking at my daughter, who was sitting on Esme's lap, both of them dressing and re-dressing the doll Alice got her for Christmas. In the end, I did exactly what I'd told Edward I'd do; I'd made the right decision for Maddie, based on what _she_ needed.

But as Alice had told me once a while back, what Maddie needed and what_ I_ needed happened to be the same thing.

"I just wish…" I added, "that Edward going to Washington hadn't been necessary."

"Bella," Emmett chuckled, "it was completely necessary. One way or another, Edward would've been taking this trip. Either to take care of your ex, or to sweet talk you back."

"He wouldn't have let you get very far," Esme said quietly but surely. I could tell she purposely left out Edward's name, so that Maddie wouldn't know what we were talking about. "He would've been on the next plane out," she added, stroking Maddie's dark hair. "You and she are his family Bella. You're _our_ family." Then she lowered her head and placed a tender kiss on Maddie's head.

Once Carlisle returned from a short day at the hospital, we all had dinner together. Uncle Aro joined us that evening, and even Edward's cousin Vicky came along. She was…different from Alice and Rosalie, more like the conceited and spoiled image I'd once had of filthy rich women, and I caught her staring at me a couple of times during dinner. It made me a bit uncomfortable, because Edward had told me that she and Tanya were actually friends. But afterwards, while I was in the kitchen helping Esme clean up, and Esme had walked back to the dining room to clear out some more dinnerware from the table, Vicky came in, carrying one solitary dirty wine glass, and deposited it in the sink, with a noisy clink. I loaded it into the dishwasher without a word.

Vicky stood there for ten seconds, and then I looked up at her.

"You know, Tanya's wrong about you. You're quiet but you're not a phony, are you?"

I shrugged. "_I_ don't think I am."

She stared at me thoughtfully and laughed. "Yeah, I guess you are exactly what my cousin needs." I wasn't sure at first if it was meant to be a compliment, or what, but then she added,

"Daddy told me what Tanya was trying to do, and I swear to God, I had no idea. I like having fun as much as she does, I'm not even going to try to deny that," she chuckled, "but family's family. Daddy always taught me that. Tanya could go fuck herself from now on."

Edward finally called later that evening, once he reached Port Angeles. He put Charlie on the phone after he and I spoke for a while, and it took me a minute to settle into a semi-conversation with my dad; I was too astounded by the strange background sounds of Edward and Jake, laughing and joking like a couple of old buddies. I supposed there was nothing like a common enemy and Jake's whirlwind engagement to Leah to build a new friendship on. I tried not to pay attention to what was going on in the background and focused on Charlie.

"Dad, you've seen how…protective Edward can be. Please, try to keep him calm out there."

"Yeah, sure, sure."

"Charlie," I warned.

"What Bells?"

I sighed into the phone, standing out on the Cullen's front porch, feeling the icy ocean breeze nip at my cheeks and lips.

"Don't forget you took an oath to keep the peace."

"Those are more like…vague guidelines than actual oaths."

"Vague guidelines my butt Chief Swan! Dad!" I stomped my foot on the wood porch.

"Alright Bells! Alright!" He huffed. "Wanna speak to Jake and get on his case too?"

I smirked and shook my head. "Never mind. I'm not even going to try with that one."

OOOOOOOOOO

Eli opened the cab door for us when Maddie and I, as well as Rose and Emmett arrived at the Central Park West building later that evening.

"Senow Eli!" Maddie squealed, as Eli took her hand to lead her into the building, "Fewiz Navi…Navi…" she closed one eye and wrinkled her little brows, trying to remember the words Edward had taught her yesterday, for her to greet Eli with tonight.

"Navidad," Eli said slowly, smiling down at Maddie. We all walked to the elevator.

"Yes!" Maddie cried, delighted. "Navidad! My daddy taught me that!"

Eli's eyes sparkled. "Ah, you mean your papi."

"What's papi?" Maddie asked, as we all walked into the elevator.

"Papi means daddy in Spanish," Eli said, unlocking the penthouse floors.

"Yes!" Maddie agreed enthusiastically. "My papi taught me that."

We all laughed. Eli leaned into me before stepping out. "Feliz Navidad Ms. Swan. Mr. Cullen informed me he'll be away this evening, but don't worry, no one will be getting past this lobby tonight."

"I'm not worried anymore Eli," I said.

He smiled, searching my eyes for a second. "That's good to hear Ms. Swan."

After I got Maddie in bed that night, tucking her in with both Angie and the doll Alice got her for Christmas, I took a slow walk around Edward's apartment.

It was a beautiful apartment, there was no doubt about it; with its marble fireplace and baby grand piano in the large living room. The gorgeous state-of-the-art kitchen with marble counters and dark, rich wood cabinets, the huge terrace with the outdoor fireplace and outdoor furniture and priceless view of Central Park, the guest room Maddie's slept in, much bigger than my own bedroom back in Brooklyn, and of course, Edward's bedroom, with its huge windows and master bath with Jacuzzi, and a walk-in closet that made Alice green with envy every time she came over. The whole place was decorated simply, yet tastefully, the walls painted pale creams and greens.

Edward had wrapped my hand around the key last night, with an intense look in his eyes, after he'd asked me to stay here tonight, and to return here after work tomorrow and wait for him.

"This…is yours."

I'd swallowed thickly. It was no big deal. I mean, I'd given him a key to my apartment. But something about the way he'd looked at me when he'd handed me the keys and said those words…

"Okay. I'll hold the keys to your apartment until you come back."

He'd grinned and chuckled, shaking his head. "I don't want those back."

"Okay," I'd said again.

He'd chuckled once more and looked down, shaking his head, a lock of bronze hair falling over his forehead. When he'd looked back up, he'd changed the subject. But the look was still in his eyes.

Now I took a quick shower, my eyes trailing longingly to the Jacuzzi in the corner of the bathroom; remembering myself and Edward there late the night before last. We'd given Maddie, as well as each other, a proper Merry Christmas, before tucking her into bed. Then we'd talked and cried and confessed everything to each other.

'Can you ever forgive me?' he'd asked, as if the answer to that could've ever been 'no'. He'd hid things, things he admittedly should've told me, to protect me. But hadn't I done the same by not telling him as soon as Paul called; by not going to him as soon as I left that diner? How could I blame him for an unrealistic instinct I was just as guilty of?

Once the tears subsided, he'd picked me up and carried me to the master bathroom. Silently, he'd turned the Jacuzzi on, letting the water trail down his hand as he felt its temperature and adjusted it until it was just right. Then he'd turned to me with gentle, caring eyes.

"This will relax the both of us."

I'd nodded.

Slowly, with our eyes on one another, we'd each removed the others clothes. And once we were standing before each other completely naked, he'd taken my hand and guided me carefully into the big, triangular shaped tub, helping me sit before lowering himself behind me and then pulling me back so that my back rested on his sculpted chest, and then taking a deep breath, I'd let my head fall back on his shoulder.

For a long, long time, we'd just sat there, him sitting behind me, his hands encircling my shoulders and running through my hair, giving me occasional kisses on the side of my neck, against my ear, in my hair. Until I'd felt my eyes closing as the hot water lapped around us, lulling me, reminding me that, as long as my daughter, _our_ daughter, was safely with us, and that I was in Edward's arms, all was well in the world. I'd almost forgotten that simple fact.

Right before I'd closed my eyes to sleep, I'd felt Edward's hands moving once again against my shoulders, but this time his hands were soapy, and he silently lathered me, from shoulder to collarbone, across my neck, before moving languidly to my sides, passing over my breasts as he massaged them, cleaning me. Instinctively, I arched my back further into him, throwing my back and my head fully against his hard chest as I felt my thighs tighten under the water, a familiar heat coursing through them. Without any words, his hands trailed lower, disappearing under the water, while his mouth placed soft, open-mouthed kisses on the back of my neck and along the shoulders he'd just lathered. Gently he lifted one of my legs with his hands and slowly trailed them up my ankles, bending the leg so he could wash my upper leg, and then he did the same to the other leg, until they were both bent in front of me, and then... – the hot water from the lonely shower I was currently in fell over me while I leaned against the cold tiles, breathing hard at the memory - …then he'd parted my legs with his strong hands, his long fingers moving lazily up and down my inner thighs, his tongue dancing up and down my neck, nibbling at my earlobe. And then his thumb found that spot, that one glorious spot, and he pressed down on it at the same time that his long middle finger moved inside me, making me cry out and drop my head heavily against his shoulder. And then his thumb was moving in circles while his other finger plunged expertly in and out, in and out, slowly, his strong hand wrapped around me, making my breath come out in shallow pants. The heat in the Jacuzzi had shot up exponentially, burning my inner thighs in the most wonderful way. Behind me I could feel his erection getting harder, pressing up against me as I moved against it, slowly at first, but then more insistently. And the quicker I moved against it, the quicker Edward's finger moved inside me, the tighter he gripped me in his hand. I put my own hand over his, lacing my fingers between his and holding him firmly against me. His own breathing became hard and erratic and fanned across my wet shoulders and neck, making me shiver.

And then his finger just wasn't enough anymore. In one fluid motion I turned myself around and straddled him, watching with wonder the intense set of his square jaw, his beautiful face, his bronze hair darkened to black by the water, his dark, hooded eyes, burning me deliciously even before I lowered myself on him and took him completely inside me in one swift motion. I'd cried out at the instant sensation, and then smiled lazily at the maddeningly lustful sound that emanated from deep within his chest. I'd moved over him slowly at first, the hot bubbling water from the Jacuzzi surrounding us, the sound mixing with the sounds coming from us, moans and groans and quiet whimpers. His hands moved to my hips and he guided me gently at first, raising me and lowering me over him, until both our needs grew and his grip on me tightened and, little by little his guiding motions became quicker, more insistent, the water splashing around us and falling out of the large tub, wetting the cream-colored Italian marble on the floor. His tongue circled around my breasts, first one then the other. I threw my head back and moved quicker.

"I love you Bella. _Aah_," he groaned, "I love you. I'm sorry," he breathed. "I'm so sorry."

"No," I moaned. "Don't do that. No apologies now. _Ohhh_, _please_ not now."

I gripped tightly to the edges of the tub behind Edward for leverage, and then pushed myself down on him as far as I could possibly go. Heat traveled all the way up to my scalp, making my hairs stand on end. I lowered my mouth to Edward's to silence his unnecessary apologies, and then repeated the motion once more, using my grip on the tub to push in impossibly more and swallowed Edward's groans and cries into my mouth.

And then he lowered his hands to my behind and thrust into me with such force that a quarter of the water in the tub splashed loudly out over the edge. Once, twice, three times.

"Ungh!"

"Ohh!"

I felt his warmth explode inside me, and then the heat was just too much; too much and not enough at the same time as I tried to chase it, to explode with it.

And then suddenly I was resting on top of Edward, so, so tired, my eyes opening and closing, my muscles turned to jelly. My heart beat loudly against his.

We were quiet for a long while, just holding onto each other while the water bubbled quietly around us.

Finally, Edward drew in a deep breath. "Well, I guess _that's_ what they mean by make-up sex. If making love with you at _any_ time wasn't already mind-blowing, I might have to pick a fight with you every night."

"Ditto," I'd chuckled tiredly, unable to form any more words.

But now, this night, all alone on Edward's bed, I slept fitfully; knowing there would be no replay of that Jacuzzi make-up, or any replay of anything tonight, not with Edward thousands of miles away. No matter how much I tossed and turned, I couldn't get comfortable. It wasn't as bad as it had been the night I'd almost broken it off with Edward; that had been...pure hell. Tonight I was worried; because he was thousands of miles away from me; and because, although I knew that my dad, and even Jake, would be with him, I knew what Paul was like. I _did_ understand that Edward needed to do this; but that didn't mean I had to like it.

And because I'd just gotten so used to sleeping with Edward's arms wrapped around me, my body spooned into his, his warm breath in my hair, his hands roaming freely all over my body all night, caressing and touching and feeling, I found it impossible to make my body understand it was just for one night.

So it wasn't until the early morning light started to filter in through the dark blinds that I finally felt my eyelids getting heavy with sleep. And as some point my mind drifted away into unconsciousness.

In my fitful dreams, I felt Edward's hands on me, his fingers tracing my spine all the way up and then all the way down as I slept on my stomach, with my arms supporting my head under my pillow. His warm lips followed the path his fingers laid out. I felt his light touch down my back, over my butt, down the back of my legs, all the way down to my feet. In my restless and needful slumber, I could even swear I felt my toes in his mouth, tickling me. I moaned.

"Edward," I murmured. "Stay. Stay with me."

My subconscious mind made him chuckle lightly against the back of my shoulder at my request. That same subconscious was so needy that I could even smell the sweet, musky scent of him.

"Not yet," he whispered in my dreams. "Soon."

"Mmmm," I moaned, shifting around restlessly.

At some point, the dream shifted. Now I heard giggling in my subconscious. Maddie's sweet, childish giggles rang out happily at the edges of my dreams. And whispers. Sweet, high-pitched whispers blended with lower ones. The giggling grew louder, nearer. My eyes half-opened, slowly, landing on the blurry outline of a tiny, sparkling green figure. I forced my tired eyes to open wider, rubbing the sleep out of them, until I beheld in front of me a glittering little green fairy with long dark hair, poised with her hand half way in the top drawer of Edward's nightstand, looking down at me with an impish smile.

"Maddie?"

The phone rang just then, startling me into a sitting position and chasing all the sleepiness out of me.

It _was_ Maddie. She looked like a little green fairy, dressed in her Tinkerbell costume with her hand in Edward's top drawer, holding something glittery.

The phone kept ringing. I reached over for it quickly.

"Edward?"

"Good morning love," he chuckled. "Did I wake you?"

I blinked twice. Maddie's little hand sprinkled something glittery – fairy dust? – inside Edward's drawer before closing it and, turning with another giggle, skipping out of the room.

Was I still dreaming?

"Edward?"

He chuckled again. "Yes love, it's me. Are you okay?"

"I…I wasn't sure if I was awake or not."

"Having pleasant dreams?" his voice sounded amused.

"Uhm, yeah…and a bit strange." I looked at the clock on the nightstand. The florescent numbers glowed brightly. Six oh four a.m.

He snorted. "You'll have to tell me all about them once I get back. But right now I need you to do me a favor."

I blinked again, still feeling groggy from the strange wake up call and the lack of sleep.

"Uh, okay. What is it?"

"I need you to go into the top drawer on my nightstand and get something for me."

The drawer Maddie had just been in. Or at least, that I thought she'd been in?

"Okay." I ran one hand through my messy hair and twisted around on the bed reaching over to Edward's nightstand and pulling the drawer open.

It was full of fairy dust.

Or glitter.

Thousands upon thousands of little flecks of glitter lay all over everything in the drawer, until all Edward's dark Calvin Klein boxers sparkled brightly in the sunlight peaking in through the blinds.

I gasped.

"What is it?" Edward asked.

"I…I thought maybe I'd been dreaming…"

"What happened?" he chuckled.

"It looks like Maddie woke up in a playful mood. She's dressed up like a fairy and she sprinkled glitter all over your drawer." I started rummaging carefully through the drawer.

He started laughing. "That's okay."

"What exactly am I looking for? There's nothing but boxers in here."

"Oh yeah? Alright, never mind then. Can you go into the kitchen drawer for me then? The one on the left hand side of the sink."

I got off the bed and made my way out of the bedroom.

When I stepped into the wide hallway, I gasped again.

The entire walkway was covered in a blanket of silver glitter. I followed the glitter trail, which led to the living room. The entire wood floor was covered in the shiny stuff.

"Oh boy. Maddie?" I called, frozen in the middle of the room. I heard her giggling in her room, but she didn't come out.

"What is it?" Edward asked curiously.

"There's glitter dust everywhere," I breathed.

Edward chuckled again. "Don't worry about it love. I'll help you clean it up when I get home. Are you at the drawer yet? I kind of need you to find that thing for me right away."

Breathing in deeply, I made my way into the kitchen. More glitter everywhere. I opened the drawer Edward asked me to look in, only to find more glitter in there.

I ran my hand through my hair again. "You're not going to believe this."

"More glitter."

"Yup."

He started laughing.

I sighed. "What am I looking for in here, besides mounds and mounds of fairy dust?"

"Just tell me if you see a small, blue square thing."

"A small blue square thing?" I repeated, moving things aside; pens, pencils, post-it squares, loose bills and change, keys, and other assorted items. But nothing small, blue and square.

"Yeah."

"Uh, nope, can't say there's anything like that in here."

He drew in a deep breath. "Really? Hmm. Let's see," he said thoughtfully. "Oh alright! How 'bout in the cabinet under the sink in the main bathroom?"

"You want me to look?"

"Yes, please darling."

I shuffled quickly over, marveling at all the glitter marking a path, strangely enough, to the bathroom.

Where the heck had Maddie even gotten all this glitter?

I knelt down in front of the cabinet, and almost wasn't surprised to find more glitter inside, sprinkled all over all the cleaning supplies in there, making it look like a treasure chest.

"More glitter, but nothing square, blue or small. Just the cleaning supplies. Hey, what exactly is it anyway?"

"Hmm," Edward said thoughtfully again, apparently too lost in thought to answer my question, "where can it be?" I heard him snap his fingers over the phone. "Wait a minute. I think I've got it. I'm sorry love, but do you mind checking one more place for me?"

"Sure," I shrugged, walking out of the bathroom slowly, my eyes marveling over all the glitter in the apartment. Everything gleamed brightly, as if out of one of the pages from Maddie's fairy tale books full of sparkling magic and princes and princesses; in the lands of make believe and happily ever afters.

"Can you go into Maddie's room?"

Maddie's room he said; not the guest room.

"Maddie's room?"

"Yes."

I bit my lip thoughtfully. "Okay."

I made my way into the room my daughter currently occupied.

She was standing in front of her new trunk of dress-up costumes, a fairy wand in one hand, and a fistful of glitter in the other. She smiled widely and giggled uncontrollably when I walked in.

"Mommy!"

"Maddie sweetie, what have you been doing with all that glitter?" I asked, bewildered.

"Daddy said I'm the faiwy."

"I know daddy said you're the fairy, but I don't think he meant-"

"Bella?" Edward interrupted over the phone.

I sighed again. "Yes Edward. I'm in Maddie's room. Where do you want me to look?"

At the same time that Edward answered, "In Maddie's trunk," Maddie pointed daintily to her trunk with her little silver wand and sprinkled the remaining glitter in her hand over it.

My eyes grew wide and my heart suddenly picked up speed. But my legs moved slowly, of their own volition, towards Maddie's dress-up trunk. As I got closer, my eyes fell on a small, baby blue square box wrapped in a red ribbon, right on top of Maddie's open trunk.

I drew in a sharp breath.

"Did you find it?"

But Edward's velvet voice no longer came from the phone. It came from right behind me.

I dropped the phone. Tears stung my eyes. Unable to speak, I simply nodded without turning around.

"Well pick it up then," he said quietly.

With a shaking hand, I reached down and picked up the little blue box. It trembled in my hand.

"Now turn around."

I turned around slowly, a small smile on my face and tears streaming down my cheeks.

There he stood. My knight in shining armor. Well, he wasn't exactly wearing armor, more like a ribbed turtle neck that showed off his lean, perfectly toned chest, and a pair of jeans that hung low on his hips. I stared at him in awe; from the top of his one-of-a-kind tousled bronze head of hair, to his perfectly chiseled features, to his glorious emerald eyes and beautiful crooked smile. I chuckled once, choking on my tears.

"What do I do with it now?" I asked.

He gazed at me pensively. "Well, now you can hold it out for me."

I did as he told me. He moved towards me slowly, his sparkling eyes - shining along with all the glitter surrounding us - never left mine. He took the box from my hand, letting his fingers trail over my palm gently, and, still gazing at me, pulled on one end of the ribbon so that it fell to the ground, and then opened the box. Inside was a smaller, velvet box, and I drew in another breath when I saw it. For a couple of seconds, I thought, perhaps I was still dreaming. The glitter, Edward's phone call, the strange hunt around the apartment; all of it just part of a wishful fantasy.

But then Edward took two more steps closer to me, until he was just a few short inches away. The corners of his eyes gleamed with emotion. His hands trembled slightly, unnecessarily. His chest heaved quickly up and down.

This wasn't a dream. This was real.

He opened the box in front of me, and pulled out a beautiful ring with a glorious, shimmering blue stone surrounded by smaller white ones, all on a perfectly simple white band.

I'm sure I must've looked comical, the way my eyes bulged. And I completely stopped breathing. Out of the corner of my eye I saw our daughter's eyes widen and her little mouth form an 'o'.

"Oh daddy, it's sooo _bootiful_…" she murmured. Edward chuckled nervously.

Only one moment in my life could top this one; it was the moment our daughter first popped out of me. And in the back of my mind, tangled up with thoughts of our past, our future, and our present, I saw more unforgettable moments we'd share; births, celebrations, more moments to be committed to memory in as much detail as possible; but they'd all include Edward.

He didn't kneel, but swallowing nervously and with a smile on his lips, he took my left hand in his.

"Isabella Marie, since the moment I first laid eyes on you, you have been my forever. I ask you now to please let me be yours."

Short, simple, to the point.

Perfect.

I started crying, laughing and then shaking. Edward looked startled for a split second, but then his shoulders, which had been slightly stiff – as if he could _still_ doubt my answer – relaxed, and he laughed too. And then I threw my arms around him and kissed him over and over and over again, still laughing, still crying, my tears washing over his face. His arms wrapped around my waist, and he picked me up and swung me around.

"Is that a yes?" he asked.

I laughed and kissed him again. "As if I could ever say 'no' to forever with you. Yes. Yes. Yes!"

His mouth turned up in the widest grin I'd ever seen him wear, and his eyes sparkled brighter than Maddie's glitter. And then he placed the ring on my left hand, staring down at it for a few long seconds, as if in total disbelief, before picking me up and holding me so close to him I thought I'd faint.

And then Maddie was in our arms, wrapped in between us.

"Did I get it right daddy?" she asked excitedly. "Did I get it right?"

Edward kissed the top of her head, and then the top of mine, looking from her to me with his mesmerizing green eyes.

"We all got it right princess." He sighed deeply and held us tightly against him. "Somehow, we all got it right."

* * *

**So how was the proposal? **

**How were you proposed to?**

**Reviews are as sweet as glitter, and **_**almost**_** as hot as hot tubs. Leave one**.

**One more chapter left from E's POV, to see what happened in Washington, and then to take us to the end. :)**


	36. Chapter 35 This Is Who I Am

**A/N: Alright everyone. Last chapter below. Read on. We'll talk at the end.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

**Chapter 35 – **_**This**_** Is Who I Am **

**Chapter Song Rec: **_**Lucky**_** by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat**

* * *

**EPOV**

It was late afternoon by the time we reached Hoquiam. The rain, which had been getting steadily heavier as the day wore on, now came down in sheets, blurring the buildings and trees and cars we passed into unrecognizable shades of greens and greys.

I leaned forward in the driver's seat, stretching my neck closer to the windshield to try to make out the street signs, but Charlie and Jake were both more familiar with the area than I was, and they assured me we were almost there. When the red neon sign blurred into view, the red brick and concrete square building - darkened to a muddy brown by the heavy downpour - appeared suddenly through the sheets of rain. I pulled the rental car over into the gravel lot. The small rocks made crunching sounds as they pelted against the tires and bottom of the rental. I parked in the very back before cutting the engine. In the silence, the sound of the rain pounding against the car mixed with the loud cacophony of music from inside the bar, pounding out a disjointed beat only audible to the three of us.

"Now Edward, as a man, I understand why you need to do this, but I promised my daughter I'd make sure you stayed as calm as possible. And Jake here's along for the ride in case Paul gets any ideas about tag-teamin' you."

"Charlie, Bella's request there was pretty general though," Jake pointed out from the passenger seat next to me. He turned to face the Chief in the back seat.

"I mean, you and I not knowing Edward for that long, it's kinda hard for us to know what calm is for him. It could be anything from clenching his hands at his sides, to beating Paul within an inch of his life." He shrugged. "Who are we to judge?"

I could see how Jake and I – now that he'd turned his romantic interests elsewhere – could someday be buddies.

Charlie frowned, smirking. He put one hand up, palm out. "Now, now boys. We're not here to fight with Paul." At our low groans he leveled both of us with a stern glance. "Paul needs to know Bella and Maddie have got Edward here to take care of them now, so he never tries to pull his shit again-"

"Exactly."

"That's what I'm sayin'."

"_But_," Charlie spoke over us loudly, pausing to draw in a lungful of air. His eyes were dark, and his nostrils flared, making his mustache twitch. Yet when he spoke again, his voice was calm. In a way, he reminded me of Carlisle.

"So long as I'm around, there won't be any fists flyin'. Are we clear?"

Neither Jake nor I answered right away.

"I said, are we clear?" he asked again, raising one eyebrow.

"Yes Chief," I sighed. "We're clear."

Jake sucked his teeth. "Yeah, sure, sure Charlie. We're clear," he sulked.

"Alright then," Charlie said, putting a hand on the door handle and opening it half-way. "Let's get this show on the road."

The bar was dark and smoky. An angry rock band wailed loudly over the speakers when the three of us walked in. Demetri had told me exactly where to find him. Apparently, Paul had a routine of spending his days with cheap booze and even cheaper women before going off to work at the casino, where he'd end up gambling away whatever money he hadn't burned off at the bar.

When Jake tapped me on the shoulder and pointed towards the bar counter, at the wide-shouldered back of a tall, dark haired man that could've almost been Jake from behind, I allowed myself a split second of pity. Shaking my head, I wondered what kind of shit for brains this guy must have had. To have once made a conscious decision to risk Bella and Maddie for this sort of existence. He'd had it all; a beautiful wife, an adorable baby girl, and he'd thrown it away instead of thanking his lucky stars every goddamned day and night.

But in the next second, a skinny dark haired woman in a black tube top and cut-off daisy dukes walked over next to him and put her arm around his neck. She said something to him in his ear and he wrapped his arm around her skinny waist, pulling her into him and digging his face into her chest. She squealed with delight, and he laughed heartily.

All pity melted away. My top lip twisted up; my blood boiled in my veins.

It was just a few days ago that he'd told Bella – _my _Bella - that he wanted her back. My fists clenched tightly inside my coat pockets, where I'd stuck them to try to keep my promise to Bella and the Chief.

Yet here he was, shoving his face into a pair of skinny tits. He'd never deserved Bella. And the truth was, I wasn't sure if I did either. But one thing I was sure of, I'd cherish her and Maddie until the day I took my last breath, and I'd spend all my time between now and then doing everything I could to make them happy.

And safe.

I made my way over to the stool where Paul sat nursing a shot in one hand, and Daisy Duke's ass in the other.

"Keep it calm son," Charlie murmured from behind me, where he and Jake stopped to wait.

It took a few seconds for either Paul or his handful to realize there was someone standing right behind them. The girl turned around first, and though I kept my eyes on the back of Paul's head, out of my periphery I saw how her heavily made up eyes grew wide. She looked me up and down shamelessly, her big red lips turned up.

"Well, well, what do we have here?" she purred.

This made Paul finally turn in his stool. He caught sight of me and frowned.

"Who the hell-" his eyes flashed behind me, catching sight of Jake and Charlie.

He smiled, ignoring me for the time being. "Well look what the wind blew in. If it isn't my little bro and my favorite father-in-law."

Charlie and Jacob both said something in response, but I had no idea what it was, because at the same time that they were talking I glared evenly at Paul and said through clenched teeth,

"He. Is not. Your father-in-law."

That brought Paul's attention back to me. He studied me carefully before a flash of recognition crossed his features, widening his eyes.

He snorted. "Edward Cullen."

I said nothing.

"Looks like that wife of mine didn't waste any time in running to her rich little boyfriend."

"Your wife?" Daisy asked, pulling away from him. Neither one of us spared her a glance. Pissed off, Daisy sauntered off with an exaggerated huff.

"Think carefully before you call Bella your wife again," I said coolly, loud enough to make sure he heard me over the drums and electric guitars in the background.

His lip curled up. "What the fuck do you want Cullen? You and your entourage come looking for beef?" His eyes flickered back to where Jake and Charlie stood. "What's the matter? You too much of a pussy," he spat, "to come and find me on your own?"

My hands clenched even tighter inside my pockets. My fingers dug into my palms; warm blood ran slowly down my hands.

I snorted. "They're here for your well-being, not mine."

He chuckled. "Oh really?"

I spoke through gritted teeth. "I'm here to make one thing clear to you. That shit that you pulled a few days ago? That. _Will not_. Happen again. You won't call Bella, you won't come within one thousand feet of her or Madisen, you won't even so much as fucking check her Facebook status from now on."

Paul chuckled again and lowered his head, scratching his nose with his middle finger. He looked back up and picked up his shot glass. From the red tint of his eyes, it wasn't the first one of the evening.

"Or what?"

I stared at him. "Or I'll make sure that trip you took to New York'll end up costing you three to five. From what I've heard, you've already got quite a few problems on your plate." I shrugged. "It's up to you whether you want to add another one."

One corner of his mouth lifted up into a lop-sided grin. He lifted the shot glass to his lips and threw it back easily, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and slamming the glass back down on the counter before signaling for another one.

"You know, all you pretty little rich boys are the same shit," he said, keeping his eyes on the bar counter. "Always thinkin' you can get what you want by threatening with lawsuits and courts and your little crooked lawyers to fight all your battles for you." He looked me up and down derisively and snorted. "Yeah, you're exactly the kind of guy I would've expected my w-" – he smiled – "I would've expected…_Bella_ to end up with. Someone _so_ fucking ready and willing to fight for her honor."

His eyes flashed behind me again. "Take my little brother over there for example. Did you know that he's been dying to be the one to defend Bells' honor for years now?"

"_You goddamned son-of-a-_" Jake growled from a few feet behind me. I heard some shuffling, and Charlie's voice, trying to calm him down.

I smirked and closed my eyes momentarily, but didn't turn around.

Paul laughed and picked up his new shot. He swirled it around a bit before raising it to me and throwing it back in one gulp. The bartender eyed us warily as he wiped down the counter next to Paul.

"I'm not here to discuss your shitty sibling rivalry or your inferiority hang-ups with your brother. Like I said, I'm just here for one thing. To let you know that _I'm_ here now," – I pulled one fisted hand out from my pocket and pointed my thumb towards my chest – "for Bella and Maddie, and if you _ever_ come near them again," I growled, "it'll be me you'll have to contend with. One way or another. In court, or out. Do you understand?"

His nostrils flared. His lips turned up in a snarl, black eyes glowing in the grey haze of smoke surrounding us. I noticed how heavily he was breathing at the same time I realized that my chest was heaving just as hard.

But Paul wasn't ready to understand.

"You hear that little brother?" he called out, keeping his eyes on me.

The challenge in his expression sent a wave of adrenaline pulsing furiously through my veins.

The truth was, this moment had been inevitable since the day I'd found Bella crying in the back stairwell of our offices, when he'd had her served with custody papers. And the look in his eyes made it clear he had no intention of trying to rectify all the pain he'd caused Bella since the moment he'd entered her life.

"Looks like both of us are out of luck this time, bro," he said to Jake, while still staring at me. "Oh well." He snickered and stood up. "Bella's still young. You may get your chance yet. Then the _three_ of us can get together and swap notes. What'd'ya think?" he grinned widely.

Of course I knew he was goading me.

I'd held back pretty well, actually. I really _had_ intended to try my best to keep it from getting physical. Paul crossed the line the minute he got on that airplane to New York. Every word I'd allowed him to utter between then and now was a testament to my love and respect for Bella.

But this dumb fuck obviously needed the line drawn out for him clearly, so he'd _never_ again forget where it was. For all our sakes.

Out of respect for Charlie, I turned around to give him warning.

Charlie was already behind me. He patted my shoulder twice and leveled me with a steady glare.

"Edward, as police chief I gotta remind you that you start fighting in here, the cops are gonna be called in." He eyed me intently. "As Bella's father, I'll be outside, not seeing anything, and catching up with Hoquiam's police chief when he arrives. Make it quick."

I nodded once and turned back. With a satisfying crunch, my fist smashed into Paul's jaw, knocking him backwards. His head jerked directly over the bar counter when he staggered back, but when he recovered his fists flew in the air, landing a blow against my left rib. I met it with a blow directly against his stomach, doubling him over.

Out of my periphery, I was aware of the huge bartender talking animatedly on the phone, the crowd gathering around us, the rough music still blaring in the background, Charlie walking out, and Jake - standing in the middle of the bar with his feet firmly planted over the dirty floor, his arms crossed rigidly against his chest - making sure this stayed between Paul and me.

Because there are bonds stronger than blood.

Like the indisputable axiom that Maddie was my daughter, as much as she was Bella's. Somehow, across time and space, we'd created her together, and at the end of the day, there would be as much of me in her as there would be of Bella.

And like the fact that the Chief was part of my family, in deed if not yet on paper. Something I'd be working to rectify as soon as I got back to New York.

And the fact that, though Jake no longer had romantic feelings toward Bella, he would always love her. She was his family in a way that Paul, his own blood, would never be.

That was the bond that tied us all together; because no matter what, we all protected our family.

OOOOOOOOOO

It was dark by the time I parked the rental next to Charlie's cruiser at the airport. The rain had subsided somewhere between Hoquiam and here, leaving a cold, foggy night in its wake.

"You get that rib looked at when you get back to New York, you hear?" Charlie said solemnly from the passenger seat.

I chuckled. "It's just bruised Charlie, it'll be fine."

"Mmm," he murmured, smoothing down his mustache with one finger.

Jake chortled from the back seat. He'd been in an extremely upbeat mood ever since we left Hoquiam, despite the small police force that had been waiting outside when we'd finally made our way out of the bar. But they'd let us through without a word, there eyes bouncing all over the place, but never landing on us.

Damn, it was good having a police chief on your side.

"Yeah," Jake snickered, "I'm sure Edward's bruised rib'll heal a lot quicker than Paul's nose. That shit'll never lay just the right way again. It'll totally throw off that face of his." He laughed again.

"Mmm," Charlie mumbled again, rubbing at his chin thoughtfully. "Bella's gonna have my head for this. Maybe you shouldn't say anything to her."

"Charlie, I learned my lesson about keeping things from your daughter. It's not worth it." I shrugged. "She asked me to try, and I did. I'm only human."

"Mmm," Charlie muttered.

Jake chuckled. "Listen guys, it's been great, but Leah's waiting for me back home, and I can't wait to tell her how things went down today. She loves a good fight story."

I smirked.

But Jake had had my back today, even more than I'd honestly expected him to. It still felt a bit strange to think of him as anything other than a rival. But it was obvious he was crazy about Leah, and I could tell that what Bella had once said about he and I was true; we could be grow to be good friends one day.

"Jake," I said, turning to face him, "thanks for today man. I want you to know that I really…appreciate you keeping that bar crowd at bay."

He snorted. "Yeah sure, sure, though I gotta be honest with you, I wasn't sure you had it in you. I mean, you're not exactly puny or anything, but fuck - sorry Charlie, I mean shit - Paul's bigger than _me_."

Both Charlie and I smirked.

"Yeah well, you know what they say, the bigger they are…" One side of my mouth curled up in a grin.

"He sure fell hard!" Jake chuckled heartily. "Got his ass handed to him by the pretty little rich boy!"

I rolled my eyes.

Jake laughed. "Kidding. We cool man?" he added through raised eyebrows.

I knew he meant for much more than just today.

"Yeah. Yeah, we're cool."

He grinned and leaned forward in his seat to pat my shoulder once. "Take care man. Say hi to Bella for me and give my niece a kiss from her uncle."

"Will do."

He opened the car door and headed for the Charlie's police cruiser.

Charlie started to open his door. I cleared my throat. "Chief, can I speak to you for a minute?" For the first time today, my voice shook with nerves.

Charlie's mustache twitched. "Sure," he answered cautiously, closing his door again and facing forward. "What's on your mind?"

I swallowed hard. "Sir, I mean Chief, I mean Charlie," I stuttered nervously, looking straight ahead, both my hands still on the steering wheel. I drew in a deep breath. "Charlie, you know I love your daughter and granddaughter more than my own life."

He exhaled heavily. "Yeah, I've sort of gathered that."

My heart hammered loudly in my chest. "Well, even though it's only been a short- I mean even though it may seem like it's only been- I mean it's been long enough for me- what I'm trying to say is I already know-"

"Just spit it out son." When I paused, he breathed out in exasperation. Out of the corner of my eye I saw half his mustache twitch up. "Look, I know what you're trying to ask me, and I appreciate it son. But you don't need my permission, and if what you're asking for is my blessing, you've had that for a while now, even before the Bruce Banner display this afternoon," he chuckled. "Yeah, it is fast," he confirmed. Then he sighed thoughtfully, probably recalling his own rush into his first marriage. "And under different circumstances, I'd be on the phone beggin' my daughter to hold off for a while, but…look, you've proven yourself to me Edward, even though it's never been me you've had to prove yourself to. But I do see that you're not who all those tabloids made you out to be, and I entrust my family over to you, because I know you'll treasure them the way I do."

"I will sir- Charlie," I vowed with complete conviction. "I do."

We both stared at each other for a few moments.

"Alright then," he finally said. Then he turned and opened his door, stepping out into the fog, and making it clear that those were to be his last words to me for the night.

OOOOOOOOOO

One Month Later:

The large smooth stone fireplace in the middle of the bedroom burned brightly, illuminating the whole room in a candescent glow and providing just enough warmth so that Bella and I lay comfortably and snug under the heavy down comforter on the four-poster bed. Outside the bay window, the heavy snow falling lit up the dark night, making it look like early afternoon rather than late evening. The snow-covered Vermont mountains in the distance stood tall and proud, their white peaks gleaming.

Bella rested on my side, curled into me with her head over my chest. Slowly, her breathing returned to normal, but I could still feel her heart hammering away, the same way mine was, the way it always did when she was in my arms, especially after a session of mind-blowing lovemaking.

I breathed out heavily. "I think we've gotten a better work out this weekend by just staying in this cabin than we would've skiing those mountains."

"Told you," she murmured, running one hand languidly up and down my chest. The light from the fire caught the ring on her left hand, and every time she moved it a prism of multi-colored facets danced around the room. I smiled and brought her hand up to my lips, kissing the tips of her fingers.

"One way or another, I'm going to get you on that mountain again."

She chuckled into my chest, raising the fine hairs over it. "I don't think so. I almost broke my neck Edward!"

"I would've never let that happen," I assured her with a kiss to the top of her head.

Our eyes met suddenly, both wide and aware. "The Olympic Mountains?" I asked.

She grinned widely in answer. "The Olympic Mountains."

I grabbed her shoulders and dragged her gently up to meet my mouth, pulling her top lip between mine before running my tongue along her bottom lip. She opened her mouth eagerly and let her own tongue come out to play.

After a couple of minutes I pulled away enough to look into her eyes.

"Okay. So we've got the guest list, only family and close friends. Now we've got the place, the Olympic Mountains. All we need is a date love."

Bella moved her hands up, to play with my hair. I opened and closed my eyes, humming quietly in contentment.

She waited a while before speaking. "When did Jenks say the next court hearing was scheduled for?"

"The last week of February."

She looked just past me, out the darkened windows, thoughtfully.

"Don't worry love," I said. "Even if Paul doesn't show up, Jenks and Demetri were able to gather enough information to present to the court, making it clear that Paul isn't fit to share custody of Maddie."

She nodded, still gazing out the window. I kissed her jawline softly. "And then we can start adoption proceedings," I whispered.

She smiled and nodded once more, sighing deeply. Finally she met my eyes. "I just wish it didn't have to be this way. I wish…he wouldn't fight it, and make it so ugly. You understand that's the only reason I can't pick a date yet, right?" I lifted a hand up and ran it through her long, thick hair, smiling to let her know that I did understand.

I knew Bella was as anxious to bind herself to me in every way possible as I was. But when we get married, she wanted it to be about the three of us starting our new lives together. Not about court proceedings, and legal battles.

We didn't always like the decisions we had to make – like when I'd gone to see Paul last month, or when Bella had insisted on being there when we'd confronted Tanya - but we always discussed them, and we always came to a decision we could both accept. In the meantime, she wore the ring on her left hand proudly, never taking it off, never hiding it, not even from the press.

Of course, they'd gone batty when they'd realized Bella and I had gotten engaged, but over the past few weeks, the fascination with America's new sweetheart, and with myself, had finally started to die down. I think the fact that that vampire guy had a new movie coming out had something to do with it.

Sometimes I'd catch Bella lying in bed, or over by the sink, or just sitting and reading a book, and suddenly her eyes would go to her left hand, and she'd lift it up close to her face, gazing at it with an awe and warmth that took my breath away. And then she'd turn her hand from side to side, watching as the pretty blue diamond caught whatever light was in the room and exploded into a medley of colors, like the thousands upon thousands of specks of glitter that Maddie had strategically showered the apartment with that day last month.

Sometimes she'd catch me watching her, and her face would break into the most glorious smile, her eyes dancing, sharing all her secrets with me; every single secret I'd been dying to know since that day last August when I'd first laid eyes on her.

I let my hand roam over her face, tracing her dark eyes, running down her small nose, around her plump lips.

"Bella, as long as I have you and Maddie, I know everything else will work out."

She kissed my finger, and then took my hand in between both of hers and placed it on her chest before lowering her head over my chest again and sighing softly.

We returned to the city after spending the weekend in Vermont – Bella's Christmas present to me – and picked up our daughter from my mom's house. As much as we'd missed her, Maddie had been too busy with her nanny and pop to miss us too much.

These past few weeks - since Bella and I had finally come clean with each other about everything, and the press was finally leaving us alone, and Tanya and Paul had been put in their places - had been much more relaxing for the three of us. We were finally free to do whatever we wanted, and so we did.

We took Maddie to the playground, to the zoo, to the museums. We went out for pizza, we ate hot dogs from the corner vendors while strolling through Central Park. We took Maddie to Serendipity for her favorite dessert at least once a month. And we also gave Maddie time with the rest of her eager and willing family, so that Bella and I could have some time alone. Nice dinners (not raw seafood); quiet, private strolls through Central Park; long nights alone in front of the fireplace.

We continued alternating between Bella's apartment and mine. I would always love the city, but Bella had grown used to Brooklyn; its quieter life, the proximity to Maddie's sitter, and even to my annoying sister. It was another decision we'd have to face in the upcoming months, but we'd face it together.

The Clio Awards were held the third Saturday in February. Bella and I arrived with a hugely pregnant Rosalie and her proud husband, and a decked out Alice and her fiancée. Even James, that fucker attended. I had to admit, he _had_ played an important part in the Baby's Bottom campaign the previous year, and his presence no longer bothered me anyway. I'd grown confident in the fact that Bella was mine. And James could eye her on the sly – or what he thought was on the sly, the dumb fucker – as much as he wanted. It would always be me she went home with.

I couldn't blame him for eyeing her anyway, poor fucker. Bella looked unbelievably glorious that evening. She wore a strapless dark blue floor-length ball gown that hugged her curves before flaring out at the bottom. On her neck was her sapphire necklace, and on her ears were the matching sapphire studs. And as always, her engagement ring was the only piece of jewelry on her fingers. Once again, the paparazzi went crazy that night, snapping picture after picture of both of us, and especially of her after she won the Clio Gold for Most Innovative Print Design. My heart was close to bursting with pride, so much so that I didn't even care that for the first time since we started CCW, I had to settle for a Silver Clio. Felix Vega of the Twilight Group got my gold.

You can't win them all.

But I won the most important one, and that's all that mattered.

A few days later, at the court hearing Jay Jenks set up to work out Maddie's custody, Paul was, unfortunately but unsurprisingly, a no-show. Jenks therefore started proceedings to forcefully strip Paul of his parental rights, something we'd been trying to avoid. I looked at Bella across the small table, where we'd been sitting for over an hour with Jenks, waiting for Paul and his counselor to appear. She sighed and reached under the table for my hand, squeezing it between her own.

Yes, there would still be hard times. But we'd get through them together.

A few days later, I came home after a long evening run in Central Park. Running was still a very important part of my life, and it probably always would be. It helped me clear my mind, to be alone with my thoughts, to put things in perspective. Even stupid things like stressful days at work; Rosalie handing off more work to Bella and me in perfect tandem with the growth of her midsection; my sister Alice getting on my case about promising to keep my hair under control for her wedding day. 'Too distracting,' she called it, whatever the fuck that meant.

And my daughter's custody. Always my daughter's custody.

So I ran, mile after mile, feeling the stretching of my limbs, the tightening in my abs, the clearing in my mind. The wind blew against my jaw at the same time that sweat trickled down the side of my face, and against my ribs.

Bella read to relieve her stress; I ran. The rest we dealt with together.

The apartment was quiet when I walked in after my run. We'd already gotten Maddie in bed for the night, in a pretty white canopy bed that had been delivered a few days ago. A few of her toys and books were in her room too; but we'd held off on painting and decorating until we made a decision about where we'd be living.

I turned on the light in the living room as I made my way through the apartment. Bella was probably in the shower, getting ready for bed. I hurried into the kitchen for a bottle of water, anxious to join Bella under a nice hot stream of water. I lifted my sweatshirt over my head, and froze with it over my arms when I caught sight of Bella standing next to the window in her white terry robe, staring out at the brightly lit city skyscrapers beyond, the phone clutched tightly in one hand.

"Bella?" I flung the sweatshirt aside.

She turned around to look at me, surprised, as if she'd been so lost in thought she hadn't even heard me come in. In two quick strides I was at her side.

"Are you okay love?"

She nodded slowly, her expression full of shock.

I looked down at the phone and took it from her hand. Her eyes followed my movements.

"What happened?"

Her eyes came back up to mine. She blinked twice. "That was Jenks."

My heart stopped. "What did he say?"

"He said…" she began slowly, as if she were still too startled to speak. She drew in a deep breath, and continued in a shaky voice. "He said Paul's attorney contacted him late this afternoon."

My fists clenched at my sides. For a split second, I contemplated making a second trip to Washington in the next couple of days.

"He said…Paul…Paul signed the termination papers."

"_What_?"

Her mouth turned up in a small, unsure smile. "Yes. They were fed-exed to Jenks this afternoon, and we've got to appear in court on Friday, but…but they're signed," she said slowly, as if she were having a hard time believing the words she was speaking. "Jenks went over them. He said they're all in order."

I stared at her, too flabbergasted to say anything.

"He said Paul attached a post-it to the papers. It said, 'I can't give her anything, but I won't take from her.'"

I frowned. "Do you know what that means?"

She looked past me, as if she were remembering something. "Yeah, I think I do."

For the second time in a month, Bella and I appeared in court. Sitting at the small mahogany table once again, she gripped my hand tightly over the table, only loosening her vice grip once the judge confirmed that all papers were in order, and that Paul had sixty days to rescind the paperwork, after which full custody of Madisen Grace Swan would be granted to her mother.

Jenks stood up, adjusting the buttons on his expensive suit before clearing his throat.

"We have one more request your honor. My clients would like to begin proceedings so that Mr. Edward Cullen, Ms. Swan's fiancée, can officially adopt Ms. Madisen Swan once the sixty-day waiting period has expired."

I swallowed nervously. Now it was my turn to hold Bella's hand in a vice grip.

The judge took a look at the additional paperwork Jenks had placed before her, lifting her gaze to me and eyeing me carefully.

"Mr. Cullen?"

I stood up. "Yes your honor."

"You do realize the enormity of such a proceeding. This is not a decision that should be made on a whim."

I nodded respectfully. "I assure you your honor, this is not a whim." I turned around quickly and glanced at Bella. She gave me an encouraging smile, her chocolate eyes full of love and trust. I turned back to face the judge.

"With all due respect Mr. Cullen," she continued, "For the past few years, you and your…escapades have been very prominently displayed for all the world to see. That is not the type of lifestyle I would agree to place a child into."

"I am not that man anymore."

"Alright," she said slowly. "But if you indeed are not that man anymore, I need some assurance from you that you know _who_ you are. A child needs two parents to guide it through life, and you cannot be a guide if you don't know who you are yourself."

"I know who I am your honor," I said, for the first time in my life fully confident of that fact.

"I am not infallible, and yes, I've made a few bad decisions. But those bad decisions do no define me your honor. I'm defined by my dedication to my family, a trait that was instilled into me as a child by my own mother and father. I'm defined by my ability to earn the dedication of those I love. And if you grant us this petition, I will be further defined by my role as father to Maddie- Madisen," I corrected myself. "Because who I am, your honor, is the man that wants nothing more than to have her as my daughter, and her mother as my wife."

For a long time, the judge studied me through scrutinizing eyes, while I held my breath anxiously. But I wouldn't take back a word I'd said, because I'd finally found myself, and I owed it all to my daughter, and my future wife.

A week later, Bella, Maddie and I were enjoying an early spring day in Central Park. It was early March, and the trees were starting to show signs of life again; green buds peaked out of every branch, the grass that had withered, yellowed and dried up over the winter was now morphing into sinewy blades of moss-colored lawn, lush and soft under the blanket we'd spread out. A few dozen other blankets lay spread out on the big lawn this morning; city dwellers, pale from the long winter months, as well as tourists alike all took advantage of the rare warm day, sunning themselves over blankets, passing footballs back and forth, throwing Frisbees to one another and flying kites high over the trees and among the city's pre-war grey buildings, brick and mortar gargoyle statues gleaming under the spring sun.

The sound of Maddie's giggles floated through the warm breeze, and I opened my eyes, lifting my head from where I'd been resting over the blanket. Bella's head was on my stomach, adding an extra layer of warmth.

Maddie was running around with two other little girls about her age, Emma and Julie. Over the past couple of weeks with the weather warming up, we'd met up with them and their parents a few times while hanging out in the park. The three little girls had quickly become good friends, sharing their love for princesses and Dora and chocolate.

I chuckled as I watched my daughter point at a squirrel carrying an acorn up a tree and squeal in delight. I put my head down again and closed my eyes momentarily. The rays of sun glared down over my eyes, leaving a gold-toned impression of Maddie's smiling face burned behind my eyelids.

"She really has fun with those girls, doesn't she?" I murmured quietly, resting my head over one hand and running the other through Bella's soft hair.

"Mmhm," Bella answered.

"I'd rather she play with them than with those pain in the ass boys in Brooklyn anyway," I mumbled, grimacing when I remembered their pathetic mothers.

Bella laughed, shifting her head over my stomach. "You can't keep her away from boys forever Edward."

I smirked, my eyes still closed. "Watch me."

Bella laughed again. Her head left my stomach, and abruptly, the golden rays warming my closed eyes disappeared and total blackness danced over my eyes. When I opened them back up, Bella had the top of her body twisted over me, supporting her weight with one arm on either side of me.

She bit her lip, a thoughtful expression on her face. "Actually, I was talking to Julie's mom the other day."

"About?"

"Well…Maddie'll be starting Kindergarten in September…Julie's mom was telling me about the school Julie and Emma are in. It's supposed to be really good. But the wait list usually starts as soon as you find out you're pregnant, and it's been closed for this September's registration for a while now." She rolled her eyes.

I shook my head. Bella lowered her eyes to my chest. "I uh, spoke to Esme yesterday."

This was all going somewhere.

"And?"

"She's good friends with one of the board members at the school." She bit her lip again. "She uh…she said if we want, she can probably get Maddie registered there for September."

I frowned quizzically. "Where is this school?"

"Not too far. Just a few blocks from here."

"From our apartment here?"

She nodded, a slow smile creeping over her mouth.

I grinned widely. "Well, well, well," I chuckled, "Did Ms. Isabella Swan actually ask for, and accept a favor from her future mother-in-law?"

She blushed and shoved me in the stomach with her arm. I took hold of both her arms and she landed flat on top of me, giggling. I cradled her head in my hands and brought her mouth down to meet mine, kissing her softly.

"So we're keeping our Central Park West address?" I asked when she pulled away.

She nodded slowly with a smile. "We're keeping the Central Park West address." She looked up and scanned the large meadow, Maddie playing with her friends, spring birds flying from tree to tree, the sounds of people laughing and playing with friends and family.

She sighed. "I think I can get used to having Central Park as my back yard."

I smirked, because that was one of the things I'd always loved about where I lived.

Bella's eyes met mine again, and this time they were shining with excitement.

"And I was thinking that" – she reached down and traced my eyes with one finger – "the second Saturday in July should give us just enough time so that we can make sure we've got everything in order; the move, the adoption papers, Rose'll have had the baby, enough time'll have passed after Alice and Jasper's wedding…so…" she finished in a shaky voice.

My heart soared.

"So the second Saturday in July?" I asked, rubbing circles at the nape of her neck.

She grinned happily. "The second Saturday in July."

We gazed at each other for a few wondrous seconds, and then she threw her arms around me. I laughed heartily and she squealed with joy.

OOOOOOOOOO

A few weeks later, Maddie and I were taking a late spring father-daughter stroll in the park. The day before, we'd just finished moving all of Bella and Maddie's things over. The paint had dried in Maddie's new bedroom, full of fairy tale murals of princesses and castles in the middle of a lush, green park, all surrounded by tall pink skyscrapers and purple bridges that sparkled in the sunlight. When Bella showed Maddie her finished room, Maddie jumped up and down, clapping her little hands together loudly in approval.

Now, while my mom, Bella, Alice and Rose were out taking care of some final preparations for Alice's wedding, Maddie and I spent some quality time together. Though I was admittedly nervous about what I wanted to discuss with her today.

We stopped in front of the large pond in the middle of the park. The golden rays fell over it, making it sparkle brilliantly, like thousands of diamonds embedded in the water. I bent down and picked up a few small, smooth pebbles, handing half of them over to Maddie.

I threw one into the pond, where it landed with a small splash, scattering a few drops of water about it. She watched me carefully, and then picked out one of her own pebbles and pulled her arm back, moving it forward quickly and releasing the pebble. She giggled when it landed with a larger splash than mine had.

We alternated turns throwing pebbles in the water.

"So do you like your new room princess?" I asked.

"It's sooo bootiful daddy! Mommy says she's gonna get me a speshow fwame fuh the pwetty pichuh I dwew of me, you and mommy. So we can hang it up ovuh my pwetty bed."

"That's a good idea," I chuckled. "I'm sure that'll be the prettiest picture of all."

She put one finger on her chin thoughtfully. "Maybe. But mommy's paintings are pwetty too," she allowed with a shrug.

I laughed. Then I cleared my throat.

"Maddie princess, you remember how mommy and me explained to you that we're going to get married in a few weeks?"

"Uh huh. And I'm going to be the flowuh gurl. Just like when Aunt Ally gets maawied," she giggled happily.

"Right," I agreed nervously. "Well uh, when mommy and me get married, her last name is going to change. She's not going to be Bella Swan anymore. She'll be Bella Cullen."

She stopped throwing her pebbles and turned to me with a frown. "But she'll still be the same mommy?"

I knelt down in front of her and put one hand on her shoulder. "Yes, princess. She'll still be the same mommy, she'll just have a different last name."

Her little brows scrunched together thoughtfully, her dark eyes never leaving mine.

"How 'bout me daddy?"

I swallowed thickly, tightening my hold on her little shoulder.

"Well princess, mommy and me want your last name to be Cullen too, but it doesn't have to change right away," I rushed out. "You can still be Maddie Swan for a little while longer if you want to. But when you start school-"

All of a sudden her warm little arms were wrapped around my neck. She held me tightly before pulling back to look in my eyes.

"You mean I'm Maddie Gwace Tullen now?" she breathed.

I nodded slowly. "You're Maddie Grace Cullen now."

"Now?" she asked again.

"Yes princess, now." The judge had signed the papers two days ago.

"But it's okay if you forget sometimes, or if you still want to say Maddie Swan sometimes-"

She wrapped her arms around my neck again.

"Oh daddy, now I'm Tullen like you and Aunt Ally, and Nanny and Pop, and Uncoe Emmett and Aunt Rosie, and soon mommy's gonna be Tullen like us!"

I gazed at my daughter, so sweet and innocent, and closed my eyes for two seconds, thanking whoever was up there for the day he'd given her to me, for the day he'd given me a chance to prove myself worthy of her and her mother.

After throwing pebbles for a little while longer, I took her small hand in mine, and together we walked back home, her little silver charm bracelet dangling from her arm and jingling between us as we strolled and talked our way through the park. We'd added a couple more charms since the winter; a penguin – her favorite animal whenever we went to the zoo – and a heart. But even though she still couldn't read it, she always said that the 'Daddy's Little Girl' charm was her favorite, because her daddy gave it to her on the special day when her mommy got the special ring.

I looked down at my princess, and instinctively, her eyes came up to me. She smiled widely and hugged my thigh. "I love you Daddy."

A few weeks ago, Judge Riley asked me if I knew who I was.

I know.

I am Edward Cullen, son of Esme Cullen, mother, grandmother and philanthropist, and of Carlisle Cullen, heart surgeon, devoted husband, father and grandfather.

I am a successful ad executive. I am an avid athlete. I am a man who loves living in the city. Who loves the outdoors. Who's learned to value family over superficiality.

But more than that, I will soon be the most devoted husband possible to Isabella Cullen, and father to Madisen Cullen.

I am the man who will be there for them, always.

_This_ is who I am.

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**A/N: Alright. We've come to the end of another story. Before I make my thank you speech, I just want to remind you all that we will have 3 Epilogues to this story. At least one will be up next week, possibly two. But I can't make any other promises other than they will be coming soon!**

**Now my thank yous**.

**I'd like to thank all my dedicated readers, especially those of you who reviewed practically every single chapter. 8Papillons, Mo'Reading, keyecullen, MyHubbyIsATwilightWidow, amwine, tcrew, edlvr80, twicrazreader, N 2 Tatz, mountainlion718, for the love of cullens, jakbranton, Gillian Aubrey, RingTheBella, Humble4, buffbronze, KristinHazzard, nysue, MaxieMoose, Isabela Is Online, lgk, songhye, LuvCullens, Krazzy Hopeless Romantic, sherryola, cejsmom, hnwhitlock2000, ahlieluvstwilight, janshanr, Brown-eyedCullengirl, Kassiah, leajones, atbatbatb, carebear309, LeechLover81, sexward fan, fiyaaCullen, GorGirl, streetgurl, magaandangels, sherylb, MoniMD, What Obsession17, Missypooh, gitgit, CQCullen, and oh boy, everyone else that reviewed. Please don't be upset if I didn't mention you, my hands are just getting tired. Seriously, I appreciated every single review, those who praised the chapters, those who told me when something honestly upset them, those who caught my errors, etc. All of them. Love you all.**

**Special thanks to Elliania for my beautiful banner here on my fanfiction page, and to missoli22, for my beautiful banner and forum on twilighted dot net (go see them now if you haven't yet!).**

**And of course, special thanks to my beta, Danna0724. You were missing for a while baby, but not forgotten. Missed you much and glad you're doing better. Love you lots!**

**And thanks to Adgroovy, just for being you!**

**I hope you all enjoyed this story. I sure enjoyed writing it. Hope to see you all again over at 'If We Ever Meet Again.' I've got the next two stories after that one already figured out in my head also, so stick around if you'd like. There's still plenty of crap rolling around in my noggin'!**

**Thanks!**

**Patty**

**P.S. Don't forget to review! And come back for the Epilogues.**


	37. Epilogue 1: Expansions

**Epilogue 1**

**A/N: These Epilogues will be set up so that they capture certain important moments in time for the little Cullen family. Below is the first one, starting eighteen months after the marriage of Edward and Bella Cullen. It's a bit longer than I expected it to be, but I hope you all enjoy it. Next one should be up next week some time.**

**I'd like to thank everyone for all the great comments last chapter. They were very touching. I'm amazed to see how this little family touched so many people out there.**

**My lovely beta Danna0724 is back for this Epilogue. Thanks so much sweets for turning this monster around so quickly. I really missed you.**

**All characters (except Maddie) belong to S. Meyer.**

**Chapter Song Rec: - **_**Arms Wide Open**_** by Creed.**

* * *

**Epilogue 1: Expansions **

**Eighteen Months Later:**

**EPOV**

"Daddy can you help me with my math homework please? I don't understand this, what Mrs. Steele taught us today."

I looked over the granite kitchen countertop at my daughter. She caught my gaze and smiled widely, dimpling her cheeks and fluttering her long eyelashes softly. It was the smile she reserved solely for me, her daddy. The smile she'd learned quickly would get her anything she wanted in a heartbeat. I'd been a sucker for that smile from day one.

Sighing, I put aside my laptop and walked over to her side of the counter. I'd been on a roll; this latest proposal would be the hardest, because the client already had a winning group doing their web-advertising, the Twilight Group. I had to convince them why jumping ship from Twilight and going with CCW's new Social Media Advertising group would be a good idea for their company. It had taken me all afternoon, but I'd finally been able to work out my thoughts and ideas into the start of a decent proposal.

But Maddie needed help with her homework now. And after all, wasn't that why Bella and I alternated days working at home? So that we could be here for Maddie when she needed us? The balancing act had admittedly gotten a bit harder in the past few months since we'd started the new branch of the business, but this was me and Bella's brain child, it was up to us to make it work.

"What do you need help with Princess?" I asked leaning over her. She pointed at a textbook page of brightly colored shapes, all twisted and turned. I frowned.

"I don't get the difference between a flip and a slide daddy," she said in a tone that let me know her patience with it was wearing thin. I chuckled internally. Maddie Cullen had her father's tolerance level.

After half an hour figuring out together what the friggin' difference between flipping and sliding shapes was – and wondering to myself why the hell the Board of Education felt that this was something my daughter needed to learn in order to someday succeed as an adult – we finally figured it out and got Maddie's first grade homework finished.

She packed up her books into her pink backpack and turned to grin crookedly at me.

"Thank you daddy!" she exclaimed, before hugging my waist and pulling me down by my arms so she could plant a kiss on my cheek.

Maddie was always grinning. She had to be the happiest six-year-old in this city. Whenever we went out, people were always stopping Bella and me to tell us that.

'Oh your little girl is so adorable! Always grinning!' Or:

'What a sweet little girl! Always so happy.'

My favorite was always when we'd be at the park and inevitably someone would stop and tell us how beautiful our daughter was. Something that, since I'd become a father, I'd realized strangers tended to do to families when they were out with an adorable and well-behaved child. Then they'd go on and on about how much Maddie looked like her mother. Eventually their eyes would come up to me, and go back down to Maddie, and she'd grin up at them. It was almost always the same line that came out of their mouths.

"But she's got her father's grin."

"Yes, she does," I always answered proudly.

Maddie also shared other similarities to me. She loved running. Over the past few months she'd started to join me a few evenings a week for a run through the track in Central Park. I had to slow my pace down considerably for her, since she was about half my size. But shit, she was good for a six-year old, and I wasn't just saying that because she was my daughter. Again, people we'd meet up with would comment at what a good runner she was for a little girl.

Sometimes Bella would join us for our evening runs. But usually she preferred a few laps around the building's pool to running. Sometimes Maddie and I would join her there. But running was mostly our thing.

And my daughter _loved_ baseball. She could recite the Yankee lineup like nobody's business. And soccer. Shit, you did not want to be on the receiving end of one of Ms. Cullen's kicks, I kid you not. For the past two seasons we'd put her on a Pee Wee Soccer League, and even though at her age the games were still scoreless, it was no secret who the star of the team was. I tried not to laugh smugly every time she kicked a goal into the net, and I honestly did try to keep my fist pumps to a minimum. Still, Bella would elbow me discreetly and warn me to try and control my enthusiasm. But fuck, I was only human. A dad still had a right to be proud, didn't he?

With all of that, Maddie was still a little princess. She played with her dolls. She loved to dress up like a princess. We'd taken two trips to Disney World, and were planning another one after the holidays this year, where my in-laws Charlie and Sue Swan were going to meet us. She loved to dance; she'd moved up from Sugar Plum Fairy a couple of Christmases ago, and this year she'd be taking on the role of Clara herself in Alice's Holiday production, much to her aunt's pride and delight.

And she was completely enamored with her little baby cousin, Matthew, Rose and Emmett's son. She'd spend hours talking to him, playing with him, telling him stories.

Madisen Cullen was a happy little girl.

"Mommy, daddy, I want a baby like baby Matthew," she exclaimed one night a few weeks ago over the dinner table.

"You're too young for a baby, princess," I joked. "We'll talk about it when you're in your late thirties."

"No daddy!" She pouted. "Not me have the baby! You and mommy have the baby! A little brother!"

Since Maddie had started school over a year ago, her little speech impediments had gradually lessened more and more – a fact that had caused me great heartache. Now her speech was mostly clear, though like any six year old, she still got her sentence structure and grammar mixed up once in a while. I left it up to Bella to correct her. I simply didn't have the heart to do it. Truth was I loved listening to all her little mistakes too much. A fact that Bella always chided me about.

"You don't want her still mixing up her words and sentences when she's sixteen, do you?" Bella would ask me.

I'd shrug. "If she's still mixing up her sentences when she's sixteen, then I'll correct her."

Bella would just shake her head.

"If I leave it up to you our daughter will be married with children and still mispronouncing words."

"Nah," I'd wave her off. "I'm sure by the time that happens, when she's in her _late forties_, she'll have outgrown it on her own."

My wife would smirk at me. "You add a decade to her marrying age every week."

I'd shrug it off. My daughter was not going anywhere near boys while I was still young enough to beat the shit out of them.

Hey. I never promised to be a perfect man. Just a man that would do his best for his wife and daughter.

Bella tried to explain things calmly to Maddie over the dinner table that evening.

"Maddie sweetie, mommy and daddy will try to give you a little brother _or_ a little sister as soon as we're all ready."

"But mommy, I'm ready now!"

Bella watched our daughter and sighed deeply.

It wasn't that we didn't want to have another baby. God, just the thought of growing my family with Bella made me feel all fucking teary eyed and emotional and shit. There was nothing I wanted more. There was nothing _either_ one of us wanted more.

But about a year ago, while Bella had been filling in for Rose at CCW while Rose was on maternity leave, she'd realized that if CCW was going to remain at the cutting edge of advertising, we were going to have to delve deeply into the world of social media advertising. The project became me and Bella's baby – well, our second baby. And between our family and the new start-up branch of CCW, right now would not have been an ideal time to have another baby. We just couldn't expand the family while we expanded the business. Maybe in a year or two, once we'd gotten the new branch off the ground, attracted sufficient clientele. And besides, while our Central Park West apartment was admittedly large, it was only a two-bedroom. Having a baby would mean looking into moving. Another headache we just didn't have time for right now. It was a lot of work.

In the meantime, Bella and I enjoyed the little girl we had at home, as well as our nephew. And we definitely enjoyed practicing making them babies. We were goddamn near perfect for form by now. But hey, there was always room for improvement. So we'd just practice some more.

But although Maddie dropped the subject that night, every few days she'd bring it up again.

"Can I have a little brother?"

"Please?"

"Just one?"

"You know, princess," I said to her one night while I tucked her in, "mommies and daddies can't control whether they have baby girls or baby boys. How about a little sister someday?"

Maddie had puckered her face in a way I rarely ever saw her do. She'd crossed her arms in front of her.

"No. No little sister. Only little brother."

I jerked my head back in surprise.

"Why not a little sister?"

She'd eyed me carefully, her dark eyes, so like her mothers, holding me in an unbreakable gaze. Then she'd just shrugged.

"I only just want a brother."

So now it was November again in New York. Another summer had ended, and the cold days and nights were upon us once more. Bella and I had been busy the past couple of months, trying to get as much work done before the holidays as possible. We were going up to Forks for Thanksgiving, as had become our custom, and we'd spend Christmas and New Years here with the rest of our family. But as had also become custom Bella, Rose, Alice and Esme would prepare a pre-Thanksgiving feast for us the weekend before, so that we could celebrate with our family here too.

While my daughter went to put her backpack away, I turned back to my laptop, anxious to get at least some more work done before-

The sound of the front door opening, as well as the pleasant butterflies that flew around my insides – alerted me to the fact that my wife was home.

"Mommy!" Maddie exclaimed happily. I could hear them greeting each other in the living room; Bella asking Maddie about her day in school and whether she'd finished her homework. Sighing, I turned off the laptop. The proposal would have to wait until later. Late nights for both Bella and I had become more the rule than the exception because of the start-up.

Bella greeted me with a smile when I walked into the living room, a smile that mirrored my own emotions at seeing her; happiness, gratitude, relief, and of course love. Always love.

But she looked tired. The start-up was a lot more work than we'd both anticipated, especially because neither one of us was single any longer, or had just us to think of. We had a family to take care of, and balancing it with work was not an easy task. Totally worth it, yes. But not easy.

Looking at her, I felt guilty for not having gotten dinner ready yet. But I'd been busy too; between proposals and flipping and sliding shapes.

I walked over to her and pulled her into my arms, holding her tightly to me before pulling away to kiss her tenderly. Displays of affection in front of children were healthy, our marriage counselor, Carmen, had assured us once. We'd seen her for about a year after we got married, to help us deal with both of our issues with communicating and with letting the other help shoulder the burden of any problems or stressors in our lives. The truth was, neither Bella nor I had ever had a functional relationship with a member of the opposite sex before meeting each other. In fact, the relationships we'd had had been pretty _dys_functional. Carmen helped us deal with all that. She helped us understand that it was okay to disagree, to even argue sometimes, to show the other a side of us we weren't always proud of, and to let the one we loved help us, be there for us when we needed them. The fact that both Bella and I were madly in love with each other and were willing to do whatever it took to ensure our family's well-being made the lesson easier to learn.

Again, we weren't perfect. But we had love. And unlike what that witch that would remain unmentioned had once said, true love _did_ conquer all. Just like a fucking fairy tale and shit.

I held my wife's chin in my hand and searched her eyes, not at all happy with the dark circles I found under them.

"Love, you look tired. You should've called me. Maddie and I would've come picked you up."

She chuckled, removing her coat and walking to put it away in the closet. "Babe, it's a fifteen minute subway ride. It would've taken you half an hour to get to Columbus Circle through rush-hour traffic."

"_Subway ride_?" I asked, following her into the kitchen. "With how exhausted you look you took the subway? Why didn't you at least catch a cab?"

She walked to the fridge and started taking out ingredients for tonight's dinner. She looked up at me and rolled her eyes.

"Edward the subway is perfectly safe. Besides, at this time of day it's quicker than a cab."

I sighed heavily. Bella had always been so stubborn. Always had to do things her way.

But I had to admit it was one of the things I loved about her.

She moved around the kitchen expertly, pulling out more ingredients from cabinets and the pantry, but her movements were slower than usual. The extra time we'd been putting into this project was definitely starting to take a toll on her stamina.

I frowned, walking over to her and pulling the package of steaks she'd taken out of the fridge out of her hands, throwing it across the counter.

"Bella, you're obviously exhausted tonight. Let's just go out for dinner. We'll go somewhere close and be back early." I lifted my hands to her shoulders and started rubbing them soothingly. She hummed quietly. And as exhausted as she looked, that sound went straight to my groin. I grinned down at her. "I'll give you a nicer massage after Maddie-"

"We can't go out tonight Edward, we're having company for dinner, remember?"

I groaned and threw my head back. I'd forgotten that Alice had invited herself over for dinner tonight. Well to be fair, she'd invited us over there, but as she failed to understand - being the only one of my siblings without a child - it was much easier for her to travel to us. Wherever Emmett and Rose went with the baby, a mountain of gear followed them. And while it wasn't like that for Bella and me, since Maddie wasn't a baby that needed diapers and bottles and rattles everywhere she went, it was still easier for Alice to get her little ass over to us than it was for us to hike it down to Brooklyn.

I huffed angrily, massaging my wife's shoulders again. She rolled them around and around, again humming her appreciation. And Jesus, as exhausted as she looked, I wanted her to make that sound against her pillow for me tonight while I slid into her.

"I suppose that means Emmett and Rose and the baby are coming up for dinner too?" I asked.

"Of course," Bella murmured quietly, as if it were the most natural conclusion. She closed her eyes, enjoying her mini-massage. I sighed. Not that I didn't enjoy spending time with my brother and his family, but my wife was tired. She didn't need the extra work right now.

"And your parents are coming too," she added with her eyes still closed.

I stopped my ministrations on her shoulders. "What the hell, is it Christmas or something?" I said with exasperation.

"Hey, don't stop with the massage," Bella complained. I exhaled heavily and turned her around so that her back was facing me, and started massaging her shoulders again, rubbing my thumbs into her shoulder blades and raising the other four fingers on each hand to the nape of her neck, slowly massaging her scalp. She threw her head back and purred.

"Oh God Edward, that feels _sooo_ good."

I groaned, before lowering my head and kissing the back of her neck. She shuddered. I brought my mouth to her ear. "I don't want company tonight Bella," I murmured, nipping at her earlobe. She melted against me, and I brought my hands down to trail slowly down her sides before moving them to her breasts, cupping them in each hand and massaging those too. She moaned quietly. I let my hands trail even lower, cupping her in one hand. I hissed against her ear. God, she was absolutely _burning_ down there.

"Please," I begged, "Let's cancel. Tell 'em all to fuck off."

She chuckled throatily. "We can't do that. Alice really wanted to come over, and besides, it's not like they're spending the night Edward," she chuckled again. "They'll be gone soon enough," she finished in a whisper that promised all good things ahead.

I groaned again and pushed her against the counter, bending her over it and grinding myself into her.

"It can't possibly be soon enough," I murmured in her ear, licking her neck. This time she groaned.

"Mommy, Daddy!" Maddie called out suddenly, the sound of her little feet scampering our way. Quickly, I backed away from Bella and turned to adjust my pants and disguise my hard-on as well as possible. Displays of affection were one thing. Grinding into Bella in front of our daughter was completely something else.

A little over an hour later, I sat at our large dining room table with my entire family, while they all laughed and joked and ate merrily. Just like friggin' Christmas. I watched them all warily, anxious for them to leave. I had proposals to finish and a wife to make love to goddamnit. There was no time for family get-togethers right now.

It wasn't that I didn't enjoy getting together with my family. On the contrary, Bella and I loved to have them over. But we'd both been so busy these past few weeks, and I couldn't get over how exhausted Bella had looked getting home from work today. Her shoulders hunched, circles under her eyes, her feet practically dragging into the kitchen. She should've had a quick dinner and gone straight to bed. Not hosted a dinner party for eight adults and two children.

Halfway through dessert, I was tapping my foot impatiently under the table and casting irritable glances around the table, when Alice tapped her wine glass with her spoon.

"Alright everyone, Jasper and I have an announcement to make," she giggled happily.

Aah.

I glanced over at my wife across the table. She was grinning, watching my sister make her announcement, but there was no surprise on her face. Of course, Alice would've already confided in Bella. But while Bella didn't look surprised, for a couple of seconds, some strange, hard-to-read emotion flickered across her face. Almost like uneasiness; maybe even wistfulness.

And then she sighed, a deep heavy sigh.

I jerked my head to the side, waiting for her to meet my gaze. When she did, her smile widened, but it didn't quite reach her eyes, and then she looked away from me quickly.

We all offered Alice and Jasper our congratulations, and then Bella, my mom and I started cleaning up. The rest were all still too involved in discussing Alice's news and chasing little Matt around the apartment. I looked down at the table and started gathering up the mostly empty wine glasses that had been used for toasting, shaking my head and hoping that everyone got the friggin' hint; dinner was fun but it's time for you all to head back to your own places. I exhaled heavily as I thought of all the paperwork I still had ahead of me tonight.

As I picked up the wine glasses and lost myself in strategizing what would be the best way to get Bella to go to bed early _and_ still make love to her _and_ still work for at least a couple more hours tonight, the woman who filled all my dreams herself moved next to me, clearing the rest of the table.

"So what do you think about your sister and Jasper?" Bella asked with a small smile and a sideways glance.

I stopped, three wineglasses balanced between the fingers of each hand. Bella kept clearing the table, but there was something very precise and measured about her movements.

"I'm thinking…" I began, "I'm thinking it's a good thing Jasper's not working on the start-up with us. He's going to have his hands full now."

Bella's hands froze momentarily over the salad bowl before she picked it up and continued, without looking at me.

"Well, you know, nothing really has to change for them for a while yet."

I snorted. "Have you met Alice? She'll probably milk this for all it's worth; run the poor guy ragged. And when that baby comes, Jasper'll probably have to cut his hours by half to help Alice." I picked up a couple more wineglasses, holding these more carefully since they still had wine in them. "When we were growing up, Alice killed our fish all the time because she kept overfeeding them," I chuckled. "Poor Jasper's going to have to-"

I stopped when I saw the look on Bella's face. She'd stopped cleaning up and was staring at me with an almost horrified expression.

Confused by her reaction, I tried to explain. "They were just small goldfish Bella. Mom and Dad didn't let us get bigger fish until-"

Just then, Jasper came up from behind and clapped me on the back.

"Looks like I'm joining the club with you and Emmett man," he laughed. His blue eyes sparkled.

I grinned at him. "We've come a long way haven't we?"

"That we have," he said thoughtfully. His eyes brightened mischievously. "So hey, now that each of us is going to have a kid, it's up to you and Bella to break the tie. What'd'ya say? Since you were the ones who started it all?"

Across the table, a loud tinkling rang out, and I looked over to see that Bella had accidentally dropped a few of the utensils she'd been cleaning up over the table.

"You need help love?"

"No, I've got it," she answered quickly.

I turned my attention back to Jasper. "Bella and I aren't planning on breaking any tie right now," I chuckled, though even as I said the words something constricted tightly in my chest. "We've got our plates full, and with the new start-up, now wouldn't be a good time at all."

This time, plates and utensils alike rattled loudly against the table. When I looked over, Bella was glaring openly at me. I frowned, startled.

Abruptly, her expression changed into a blank mask. A blank mask I recognized and wasn't very fond of.

"Excuse me," she murmured, "I've got to…" she turned and stormed into the kitchen.

I looked back at Jasper momentarily, but he was either blind, or not in tune with my wife, or too ecstatic at he and his wife's news to have picked up on Bella's strange behavior. It was probably all of the above. He'd already started to walk away, headed towards Alice.

I stood in place for about ten seconds, making sure everyone seemed to be entertained, before walking quickly to the kitchen.

Bella was loading up the dishwasher, throwing plates and glasses and utensils in with an almost brutal force. I flinched at the sound of glass meeting glass.

I put the wine glasses down on the counter, deciding they were safer there, and walked up behind her, putting my hands on her shoulders. They stiffened under my touch.

"Bella love, what's wrong?"

She threw another dish into the washer. "Nothing's wrong Edward."

I turned her around to face me. She stared at my chest, refusing to look up.

"Something _is_ wrong. You've been acting funny all night, and if you keep throwing those dishes around like that, we'll be eating breakfast out of our hands tomorrow." I put one finger under her chin and lifted her head to meet my eyes. "Now tell me why you're upset at me. Tell me what I did wrong so I can apologize properly."

She snorted, but suddenly the corners of her eyes looked moist, and when she spoke her voice was shaky.

"You didn't do anything wrong," she almost growled, her eyes bouncing all over the place. "I'm not upset at you. I'm just…" – she drew in a shaky breath – "I'm just…"

"You're what?" I asked intently, moving my head into her field of vision so she couldn't keep avoiding my gaze.

When she finally let her eyes meet mine, she smiled. But it was a sad, resigned smile. Her shoulders slumped.

"I'm pregnant."

The world stopped for either fifteen seconds, or an eternity.

"What?"

She huffed. "I'm pregnant Edward."

I furrowed my brows, sure I'd misunderstood her. She couldn't mean…

"What? How?" I drew in a lungful of air, needing it before I passed out. "When?"

She rolled her eyes. "The what, I already told you. The how, I should hope you already know," she said sardonically. "And as for the when, pick any night about a month ago."

"But I mean…you're on the pill…"

She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, before opening them back up. "I guess they only promise 99.9% effectiveness for a reason. Hello point oh one percent," she drawled sarcastically.

We stared at each other for an endless amount of time, my mind racing, trying to make sense of the words.

Pregnant.

Baby.

"When…when did you find out?"

"Today. Last night, after we…you know, I realized that it's the middle of the month, and I should've gotten my period a few days ago. We shouldn't have been able to do what we did last night. So I took a test this morning and…"

She was right. By now, I was as in tune to my wife's monthly cycle as she was, although for totally selfish reasons. She disliked that time of the month because it meant cramps and bloating and blood. I hated it because it was the only time of the month when I couldn't lose myself inside her.

But I hadn't been denied so far this month. And I'd been only too happy, and probably too occupied with work, to have even noticed.

I blew out a large gust of air through narrowed lips. "Wow."

It was the understatement of the year, but it was all I could manage at the moment.

Unfortunately, my lack of verbal coherence did nothing to soothe Bella.

"Look, I know its horrible timing. I know this is the last thing we need right now, with the start-up, and how much work we've both got on our plates." She looked down at my chest again. "But I think-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," I said, lowering my head to her field of vision again. "What are you talking about horrible timing?"

Her lips twitched down as she spoke. "You said…a few minutes ago…you said now wouldn't be a good time. I know how busy you are, and I know how important this start-up is to you, so I won't make things-"

I grabbed her face between my hands. "Bella love, what are you saying? What are you thinking? Do you really think any of that could _ever_ be more important to me than our family?"

"Edward, don't try to tell me this start-up isn't important to you."

"I'm not saying that Bella."

"And don't tell me you didn't mean what you said to Jasper."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "Yeah, I meant it." I opened my eyes back up. "Till about two minutes ago."

She stared at me, searching my eyes.

"You're not upset?" she asked quietly.

Half of my mouth twitched up. "Upset? Bella…I…" – I drew in another desperately needed lungful of air. I felt dizzy, startled, my heart was beating like a friggin' racehorse.

"Bella, I'm shocked beyond words, yes. Was it the last thing I expected right now? Probably. But upset? Bella…I am so the opposite of upset that I don't even know how to put it into words. I can't even describe to you what I feel right now. Me. A man that makes a living out of describing things. All I can say is that once this shock wears off, I will bet anything that you won't be able to find a happier man in this city. In this friggin' state."

A wider, though still tentative smile graced her pretty lips. "What about the start-up Edward? I mean, this shouldn't affect it for now. But once…the baby comes…" – my heart jumped, my eyes widened; those three short words had suddenly made it all so much more real.

I grinned widely.

The baby.

A baby.

We were having another baby.

And the shock wore off. I picked up my wife and spun her around in my arms, kissing her over and over again. She squealed in delight.

"Oh God Bella, I love you. I love you so much."

She wrapped her arms around me tightly.

Then I remembered she was pregnant.

And I was spinning her around in the air.

I set her down quickly, holding on to her firmly so she could steady herself.

"Oh love, I'm sorry! Are you okay? Do you feel alright?"

She chuckled. "I'm fine Edward. Just a little tired. But it'll pass soon." She shrugged easily. That explained why she'd been so weary lately.

I frowned at her. "No more late nights for you. You'll be in bed early from now on."

"But the proposals-"

I shook my head firmly. "The proposals will get done when they get done. The start-up will happen when it happens. We're having a baby, and that's all that matters right now."

She raised her eyebrows. "You're schedule…"

"Is out the window, and I couldn't give two shits." I smiled crookedly. She smiled back. "The Cullens are expanding their family. All other expansions can wait."

OOOOOOOOOO

We didn't tell our families right away. Something about waiting until the first trimester was over. It was fucking hard for me to keep a lid on, especially every time I spoke to my mother, though I suspect she knew long before we announced it. Every time we saw her pre-announcement, her eyes would sparkle and her mouth would turn up in a knowing grin. Or at least what I perceived as a knowing grin. I'd avert my gaze away from her, trying desperately to keep my word to Bella. But then when I'd meet Esme's eyes again, that grin would still be there.

Yeah, she knew.

A week after Valentine's Day, the night before we told our families, we sat with Maddie on her bed, tucking her in, one of us on either side of her.

I cleared my throat. "Princess, there's something mommy and I would like to tell you."

She watched us patiently.

"I..uh…that is we…uh…mommy and me…" Bella reached out and took my hand over Maddie's legs. I drew in a calming breath. "We're going to have a baby."

Maddie stared at us for a few moments, her eyes finally growing wide. "You mean I'm having a little brother?"

"Or a little sister," Bella corrected gently.

Maddie shook her head. "No," she said with certain conviction. "Not a little sister." Then she grinned and clapped her hands happily. "I'm having a little brother!" She bounced up and down on her bottom. "Yay! Can he come running with us at the park daddy? And can he play soccer on my team?"

I chuckled. "Not right away princess. But in a few years, maybe."

This news, that she'd have to wait a little while before her sibling could join her in play, subdued her somewhat. She turned thoughtful for a few seconds, before smiling widely again.

"Mommy, can I help you feed him like I help Aunt Rosie feed Matthew sometimes? And can I hold his hands when he learns to walk?"

Bella smoothed back our daughter's hair, smiling tenderly at her. "You can certainly help feed your little brother _or_ sister. And hold his _or her_ hand when he _or she_ learns to walk."

Maddie ignored her mom's hints. "Yay! I'm gonna have a little brother! I'm gonna have a little brother!" she sang, flinging herself into my arms. I chuckled and held her tightly.

The next few months passed by unbelievably quickly. At first, the only outward signs that Bella was pregnant were her increased appetite and slight loss of energy. She didn't suffer from morning sickness, the way I'd read many women did, a fact Alice envied her greatly in those first few months. My sister spent the winter months puking her brains out every hour on the hour for the entire winter. Can't say I envied Jasper.

Bella just ate a few small meals a day, as opposed to three large ones, because otherwise she got gassy. She slept when she got home from work, she slept during car rides up to my parent's house in Long Island. She slept in the middle of the day on weekends, and no matter how hard she tried to stay awake after Maddie was in bed to help on the proposals, she was out like a light within five minutes. I was glad her body forced her to rest, because God knows she fought it every step of the way.

But she was right. As soon as she hit the beginning of her second trimester, it was as if she'd been injected with some sort of energy drug. Her stamina returned full force. And with increased stamina came an increased sex drive. I was in my own personal heaven. She wanted to make love every night, every morning, twice on Saturdays and even more on holidays. She was like the sex toy version of the Energizer Bunny. Shit, I thought to myself, what the hell were all these other men moaning about? Pregnancy was _wonderful_.

Slowly, Bella's slim figure began to change. Her breasts, already perfect as far as I was concerned, filled out even more, her silky dark hair became even silkier and shinier, and little by little, month by month, her midsection grew, until by early spring she looked like she had a perfectly round watermelon hidden under her skin. She looked perfect.

The first time we felt Baby Cullen move, we were lying across the sofa, she and Maddie watching TV, while I balanced the laptop across one knee and Bella's head across the other. Maddie lay with her head not directly on Bella's stomach, but parallel with it. She was singing the baby a song, while Bella hummed along and I tried to get some work done.

Suddenly, both Bella and Maddie froze.

"Did you feel that?" Bella asked Maddie in an excited voice. I stopped my typing.

"Yes mommy!" Maddie cried. "Was that my little brother?"

"Or your little sister," Bella answered.

"Feel what?" I asked. "Feel what?"

Maddie lay her small hand over her mother's growing bulge, and abruptly squealed loudly. "Again!"

I threw the laptop across the sofa and reached out my own hand and placed it over Bella's stomach. It took a few minutes, and just as I was about to give up and pull my hand away. I felt it. A tiny nudge. Like an insistent little rabbit pushing my hand away.

"What was that?" I asked, my eyes wide.

Bella laughed. "That, Mr. Cullen, was your little nudger."

From that day on, we nicknamed the baby Nudger Cullen, because that kid could nudge like nobody's business. Bella was cooking? He or she was nudging. Bella was in the bath? He or she was nudging. Sleeping? Guess what? Nudging. Watching TV? Nudging. In the office? Nudging. Mommy and Daddy getting' busy? That kid was _still_ nudging.

"How do you go about your day with someone kicking around in there like there's some sort of gymnastics meet assembled in your stomach?" I asked Bella one day. She was lying in the Jacuzzi, taking a bath in only warm water, like the GYN had recommended. Her entire body rested under the water, except for her beautifully huge breasts and even huger stomach, which NC, as I'd nicknamed my kid, was nudging away in as always.

She chuckled. "You get used to it. It means NC is happy and safe in there," she said, rubbing her belly tenderly.

I smiled, joining in the rubbing with the soapy sponge I was using to bathe my wife. I made small circles with the sponge all over her protruding stomach, feeling NC trying to push my hand away. I chuckled and moved up to her breasts, soaping them up and watching them in open fascination and admiration.

"Don't get too used to them Edward," Bella teased, seeing the way I was gawking her mini melons. "They won't always be this way."

"They've always been perfect," I murmured. "It's just that…well…"

And being the man I was, not perfect, just fucking crazy about my wife and kids, I lowered my head and took one of her soapy breasts into my mouth – well, only about a quarter of one – enjoying them while I still had them. I'd read the books. I knew pretty soon they'd be for feeding purposes only, and I'd be banned from them for a while.

Sex, while still hot as hell, got tricky during that last trimester. Bella could no longer lay flat on her back, and throwing her legs over my shoulders had gone completely out the window, only to be remembered in dreams for the foreseeable future. But hey, creativity was what Bella and I did for a living. We made it work.

"God Edward, _yesss_," Bella moaned one night, while I thrust into her carefully from behind. I gritted my teeth and clenched my fists, wrapping my arms around her as best as I could and trying as hard as hell to keep from plunging into her the way I really wanted to.

"Is that good baby? Are you okay?" I asked breathlessly, moving slowly inside of her.

"Please Edward. Go faster. Harder. _Please_."

I closed my eyes and groaned. "Bella…the baby…"

"The baby's fine Edward," she whispered in a pleading tone. "We're rocking it to sleep. Please," she begged again. "I need _more_."

"Are you sure?" I asked, unable to resist her pleading and thrusting just a little bit harder.

"Yes. _Yesss_."

Quickly, I pulled out from inside her and grabbed her gently, turning her around to face me and then lifting her over me. I held her carefully as she situated herself. At thirty-seven weeks pregnant, her clumsy side had returned full force, and the last thing she needed was to fall off the bed while we made love.

And goddamn, maybe it sounded crazy, or even a little weird, but having a hugely pregnant Bella ride me was so fucking hot. The extra weight she carried brought her down over me with even more force, and I slid into her easily, feeling myself all the way in and her heavier body over me increasing the overwhelming warmth.

"Alright love. You're in control. Do whatever makes you feel good."

She didn't wait to be asked twice. Without even so much as a slow build-up, Bella started moving quickly, her cries getting louder and louder, until I felt her walls clamp down tightly around me and she threw her head back, forgetting the extra bulge she carried in the middle and almost falling backwards. I held her waist carefully, letting her get it all out before I exploded inside her myself.

It was fast, but fuck it was good.

But had I known that was the last time I'd be making love to my wife for the next six weeks, I probably would've tried to make it last a bit longer.

OOOOOOOOOO

It was a rare event the next day, that Bella and I were both in the office. But it was her last day in the office before being practically forced to go on maternity leave. She'd tried to insist she could work up until the end, but I wasn't having it. I knew Bella wasn't used to being taken care of while she was pregnant, and throughout this pregnancy I'd done my best to make up for everything she'd had to endure alone while she'd been carrying our daughter. Sometimes it caused us to bump heads and argue. She railed and pouted. In the end, we compromised. I agreed to let her come into the office one final time today, for the meeting, and then I'd drive her home straight afterwards.

We were pitching the social advertising idea to the Cartwrights this morning. The past couple of years of Bella managing the EverSoft account had brought the company increased sales and market share. The Cartwrights were happy beyond words, but once again, they'd gotten complacent. It was going to take some work to show them why it was important to get their brand into the social advertising market now. Therefore, we would all be meeting with them this morning.

About ten minutes before we were to meet the Cartwrights in the conference room, Bella and I were reviewing a few key strategies we'd be using with them with Emmett, Jasper, and Rose.

"With the Cartwrights, it's important to show them how entry into this market will further attract the younger demographic," Bella was explaining, seated at my chair behind the desk. I stood by her, one hand resting on the desk next to her, while I navigated the mouse on my Mac with the other hand.

"We've got to show them that it's better for them to get in on this now, while the market is still relatively controlled by a young demographic, otherwise-"

She paused. We all waited, letting her find her words while I clicked away on the laptop.

Bella's hand suddenly covered my own. "Babe, my water just broke."

"Don't worry about it love," I said distractedly. "I've got some paper towels in the bottom drawer. I'll clean up the spill once I'm done printing…these…"

Silence.

The room started to spin.

Rosalie finally broke the silence while I stood rigidly next to Bella like a useless statue.

"Bella honey, you've got to get to the hospital."

In my still frozen state, I moved my eyes to my wife and saw her give Rose a pleading look.

"Rose, you think you can run down to that clothes store on the corner and be back in ten minutes? Pick me up a dark skirt that'll match this jacket. It doesn't have to be maternity, just grab a big size-"

"Bella are you nuts?" Rose laughed incredulously. "You're not going into that Cartwright meeting with amniotic fluid dripping down your legs!"

"Maybe if I sit still no one will notice."

"Bella!"

I finally unfroze. "Bella, we're going to the hospital. Now."

She didn't turn to look at me. "There's still plenty of time for that. Right Rose?"

Rosalie didn't answer.

Bella huffed impatiently. "Alice's water broke in the middle of recitals last June, remember? And she just changed her outfit and went right back on stage-"

I swiveled the chair my wife was sitting in, and leaned down so that we were at the same eye level.

"Listen to me. Had Alice delivered Connor on that stage and cut the umbilical cord with a ballet shoe, and then gone on to perform Swan Lake while nursing him, you, Bella Cullen, would still be on your way to the hospital, _right now," _I hissed, "even if I have to carry you out of this building by force."

Her nostrils flared and her brows furrowed. She was about to open her mouth and say something in protest, when her face suddenly scrunched up and she closed her eyes, clenching her teeth tightly.

My eyes widened in horror.

When she opened her eyes back up, she blew out a huge gust of air through narrowed lips and stared at me through big, chocolate eyes.

"Fine Edward, fine," she breathed. I knew right away that must've been some fucking kind of pain she'd just felt for her to give in so easily.

I took her hand and guided her carefully to the door.

"What about the meeting?" she moaned on our way out.

"We'll take care of it Bella. Don't worry. We've got it," Jasper answered her.

"And Maddie?"

"We'll pick her up from school and keep her with us," Rose told her in a calming tone.

I turned Bella to face me when we were right at the door, picking up both her hands in mine.

"Everything'll be fine love. We've got it all covered." I sincerely hoped my voice belied the extreme terror I was really feeling.

She bit her lip nervously and offered me a tight, worried smile. I put one of our joined hands over her belly. "In a short while, we'll be welcoming little NC into the world, to join his or her big sister at home."

Her face relaxed, and she used my hands as leverage to pull herself up on her tiptoes. When I realized her intentions, I leaned my head down and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"I love you Edward," she said softly as she pulled back. "Thank you for being such a wonderful husband and father, and for making this pregnancy so easy."

I chuckled once. "I love you too Bella. And you're totally welcome."

OOOOOOOOOO

"Jesus Christ, doctor," Bella moaned, during the doctor's periodical visit to her room, "It's been almost twelve hours. I don't think labor is supposed to last this long!"

I reached over and stuck another ice chip in her mouth. She glared at me hostilely.

Over the past eleven hours or so of labor, Bella had slowly but surely gone from being cheery and grateful for such a loving husband, to clearly blaming me for the position she currently found herself in. Which was laid up on a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors and IVs, and consumed by periodic contractions that, while obviously agonizing, were doing very little in the way of dilating her cervix.

The doctor chuckled, standing by the machine that measured Bella's contractions and annotating something in the margins.

"I assure you Isabella, you're doing just fine."

"But it didn't take this long last time, with my daughter. She was practically born on the car ride over to the hospital!"

"All deliveries are different Isabella, just like all babies are different. This little munchkin seems to be quite comfy in there," he teased. Bella glowered at him.

His smile disappeared, though when he spoke his voice was still soft and soothing. "Would you like an epidural?"

I turned to my wife. "Maybe you should consider-"

"No." She shook her head emphatically. "No drugs."

I sighed. So damn stubborn.

"Are you sure?" the doctor asked slowly.

A contraction hit her just then, and she threw her head back against the pillow, shaking it back and forth as she rode it out.

"Shh," I said soothingly. "Breathe in and out." I wiped off the little beads of sweat at the top of her forehead off with a moist towel. The green line on the monitor spiked, and then slowly lowered.

"That's it…" I murmured gently. "It's passing now love." The expression on her face confirmed my expert diagnosis.

"Easy for you to say," she groaned anyway, once she was able to talk again.

I pressed my lips together to keep from saying anything. I mean, it wasn't like it was easy for me to sit here and watch her in all this pain. But I was pretty sure that wouldn't be a smart thing to point out to her right now.

"Now's the time to do the epidural Isabella. Later on it may be too late," the doctor warned, once Bella opened her eyes again.

But she shook her head once more.

"Alright," the doctor said, in a tone that said, 'Don't say I didn't warn you,' and made me shudder. "I'll be back to check on you in a little while."

A little while meant every half hour for the first six hours we were there, and then every hour once he saw we'd be taking up residence in this room for longer than just your express baby delivery. By three in the morning, we were barely further along than we'd been around midnight. As bad as Bella's contractions appeared to be, they weren't helping her dilate very much. We'd tried everything; walking around the hospital a few times, showers, the doctor had even stuck some long stick into Bella's amniotic sac to try to bring on stronger contractions. Crazy fucker.

Unfortunately, he also had a habit of sticking his finger up my wife's crotch periodically. But every time it was the same. Bella had either dilated very little, or nothing at all since the previous check-up.

"We're making progress Isabella," he said cheerfully during his latest visit. "It's just slow progress."

"No friggin' kidding," she groaned, closing her eyes. "Give the man a medal Edward. He's a friggin' genius."

In the past few hours, my once reserved and respectful wife had gone through a Jekyll-and-Hyde-like transformation. At this point, no one was safe from Bella's ire. Throughout the night we'd had a few visitors at regular intervals; Alice and Jasper, taking turns so that one of them could wait with little Connor outside in the family waiting area, my mom and dad, Uncle Aro, cracking jokes that earned him a pillow tossed at his head, and the Chief, calling to offer early congratulations from Jake and to let us know what time his flight would be landing the next day.

Bella relaxed somewhat when Emmett stopped by and told us that Maddie was at home with Rose and Matthew, and that she was just fine. Excited and jumpy, but thrilled that her 'little brother' was on his way. She still wouldn't accept the possibility that it could be a girl. Emmett and Rose had a boy, Alice and Jasper had a boy, so as far as Maddie was concerned, the odds were in her favor. Bella smiled for about two seconds while Emmett relayed the news on Maddie, before another contraction hit her. She squeezed my hand so tightly I was sure she was purposely trying to break it off.

In twelve hours, Bella's mood had gone from cheerful, to wary, to downright pissy. Not that I'd ever have the nerve to point that out.

But I guess the good doctor was used to such mood shifts in his line of work. He'd simply chuckle at Bella's outbursts and offer Bella an epidural, like he was offering her a cup of coffee. And for some strange reason, which at this point I couldn't even begin to fathom, she kept refusing. So again, the doctor would walk out, promising to check in on her again in a little while.

I drew in a cleansing breath, the kind that we'd been taught at our Lamaze class, and turned my attention back to my wife. She stared at me anxiously, her breaths coming in long, hard pants. I couldn't even begin to understand what kind of pain she was in, and my heart ached for her, wishing I could switch places with her.

Well, maybe not exactly switch places with her.

But I did wish with all my heart that I could take her pain away. There she was, in the throes of agony, and all I felt was tired from lack of sleep and anxiety over the whole situation. Sure I knew how unfair it was.

I was just about to tell her that; that I wished I could take her pain away. That I knew how hard and unfair this was to her. That I was so grateful to her for going through this for our baby. But when I opened my mouth, no words came out. Instead, I made what could have been a fatal mistake.

I opened my mouth and instead of words…a fucking yawn the size of Texas came out.

From where her head rested against the pillow, Bella glared at me incredulously, beads of sweat trickling down her forehead, into her eyes; her hair matted and stuck to the sides of her face.

"Did you just…did you just…_yawn_?"

"I…I'm sorry love. I didn't mean to."

"Am I _boring_ you?"

"No. Of course not."

"Would you prefer it if I got up and broke into a song and dance for you? Would that be more entertaining?"

"No my love. I'm not bored. It's just that…" – I glanced at the clock on the far wall, its hands moving with taunting sluggishness around and around – "we've been here for a while, and it's almost four in the morning."

To this day, I still maintain that those are probably the stupidest words I've ever spoken. Bella agrees.

Her eyes widened, and her breathing hardened even more. Her nostrils flared, cheeks so red they looked like cherries.

"Are you tired Edward?" she asked. "Am I keeping you from getting a good night's rest? Because if I am, I'll try to contract more quietly, and I'll try not to scream too loudly when this baby that _you put inside me_," she hissed accusingly, _"finally decides to rip its way out!"_

Another contraction hit her then, and she closed her eyes and moaned, digging her head deeper into her pillow and her nails deeper into my hand. I suppressed a whimper. At this point I was sure that the only thing that kept her from reaching out and strangling me was that she'd be raising two kids on her own. As it was, she gripped my hand so tightly I lost all feeling in it. I was cringing when she opened her eyes back up.

"That's it baby. Breathe," I said uselessly, remembering my lines about thirty seconds too late. She rolled her eyes and turned her head to the other side.

For the next two hours, things progressed pretty much in that vein, with Bella's contractions hitting her at even intervals, knocking her out to the point where she was unable to utter a single word. But once the contraction subsided, she'd come out swinging. Unfortunately, her swings were mostly aimed at me.

"Edward, can you please dim the lights a bit," she groaned after an especially strong and long contraction. "I feel like I'm on stage up here with those lights glaring down at me. Entertaining everyone. Except you, of course. You, I'm boring."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "Bella, I'm not bored love."

The doctor walked in just then, thank God.

"Isabella!" he cried cheerfully, earning himself a hard glare from my wife. "How are you doing?"

"Doctor," she cried breathlessly. "I've changed my mind. Please, just drug me up already."

The doctor chuckled heartily, as if he'd been expecting those words at some point tonight. I stared at him incredulously, that he could chuckle at a time like this.

"Well, let's see how we're doing first, and then we'll talk more about the epidural."

As he'd done more times than I'd ever want to remember, the doctor waited for Bella's next contraction, and then shoved his finger up her crotch, pressing down on her stomach with his other hand. Bella moaned and I flinched. I had to physically fight the urge to get up and knock him out.

Usually, a detached, sterile look would mark the doctor's features every time he poked and prodded around inside my wife. This time, however, while he wiggled his finger in there, one eyebrow arched up, as if he'd just discovered a treasure chest or some shit hidden inside my wife's vagina. And fuck, even though I knew the doctor wasn't getting off by having his finger all up inside Bella, I couldn't help the way my hands instinctively curled into fists. _I_ was the only one allowed to hunt for gold down there.

"What is it, doctor?" I asked, while Bella writhed in pain on the bed. The least Magellan could do was tell me what his great discovery was.

The doctor snorted. "Well Mr. Cullen, I've got good news, and not so good news."

My hair stood on ends. "What is it?"

He took his hand out from between Bella's legs and went to look at the monitor, while at the same time pressing down on the call button to call for the nurse. Bella's vice grip on my hand loosened, indicating her contraction was subsiding. But then almost as soon as she loosened her hold, she tightened it again, and on the monitor, I could see the thin green line spiking up again, even higher than all the previous spikes. Bella closed her eyes and moaned again.

"Shh baby, it's okay. Just breathe through it love. Just breathe." Bella whimpered. I groaned helplessly, not sure how much longer I could take this.

"Doctor, what is it?" I repeated.

With a smile on his face, he turned to face us. "Well, the good news is Isabella's dilated to nine and a half centimeters, which means as soon as soon as we get everything set up, she can start pushing."

"Oh thank God," Bella breathed. "When can I get the epidural?"

"That's the bad news Isabella. It's too late for the epidural."

"_What_?" we both cried.

Just then, the next contraction hit Bella, right on the heels of the previous one, doubling her over.

"Please doc," she cried once the contraction subsided enough to allow her to talk. I could tell by looking at the monitor that this one refused to go away completely. "Just a small epidural. I don't think I can- _ohhh_," she groaned, as she was consumed by another wave of torture.

"Breathe love, breathe," I coached, wiping her forehead with a wet cloth and smoothing down her hair. I looked up at the doctor desperately.

"Hey doc, isn't there anything you can do?"

"'Course there is," he chuckled. "I can deliver this baby." And then he turned around and started barking orders at the nurses that appeared out of nowhere. _Asshole_.

For the next couple of minutes, a flurry of blinding movement and preparations took place all around us, while Bella moaned and groaned non-stop now, and the green lines on the monitor managed to remain aggravatingly high, never dipping more than half an inch anymore. At one point, the doctor instructed Bella to sit up completely and grab one ankle in each hand. She glared at him as if he'd just grown an extra head right in front of her eyes.

"You've got to be kidding me," I told him.

"Nope," he laughed. "This is how it's done."

"I don't remember-" Bella started, before being knocked out mid-sentence by a contraction the size of Mount Everest.

"Of course you don't remember," the doctor said easily as he dropped the bottom portion of Bella's bed so he could have a ringside seat to my wife's crotch. "There are certain things the human mind blocks out. Otherwise none of us would have any brothers or sisters," he snickered.

Once this guy safely delivered my son or daughter and sewed my wife back up nicely, I would be sticking my fist in his mouth.

"Alright Isabella," the doctor said, sounding much more serious all of a sudden. "When I say go, you're going to push your chin down into your chest, and then bare down with all your might, keeping your mouth closed, until I count to ten. Are you ready?"

Bella looked exhausted and bewildered. But she nodded her head tiredly. I wrapped one arm around her shoulders and helped her hold on to her ankle with the other. The nurse helped her with her other leg.

"Alright Mrs. Cullen. Go!"

It took three sets of pushes, and then on the last one, me and Bella's eyes met, and I saw my entire future spelled out clearly in her soft brown orbs.

"I love you Bella. You can do it love. I know you can. You're the strongest woman I've ever met. You can do it."

She pushed, and then suddenly a surprisingly loud wail filled the room, and at five twenty-two a.m. on a warm August morning, Megan Olivia Cullen screamed her way into the world, expanding our family, and our hearts.

And when her older sister walked in a few hours later with her Aunt Rose, looking around the hospital room warily, I picked up her little sister and brought her over, kneeling down in front of my first daughter.

"Megan Olivia, meet your big sister, Princess Madisen."

Maddie's eyes widened, gazing deep into mine.

"You mean I'm still your princess daddy?"

I held our newborn in one arm and used the other to pull my princess close to me into a tight hug.

"You will always, _always_ be my princess," I murmured close to her ear. "No matter how many little girls or boys come along."

When I pulled back, Maddie was smiling widely.

"Would you like to hold your little sister?" I offered.

"Can I?"

I took her hand and guided her to the chair next to her mother.

"Put your arms out," I instructed, and then gently placed the little bundle in her arms, while still holding most of the small weight in mine.

Maddie looked down at her baby sister with awe in her eyes.

"She looks like a little dolly," she exclaimed in amazement. "So beautiful."

And that's how Madisen Cullen first became a big sister.

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**Reviews are **_**so**_** much better than labor.**

**And yes. My husband had the nerve to yawn while I was in labor. I'll never forgive him.**

**Any great labor stories?**

**Next Epilogue should be up next week. From Bella's POV, from a different point in time…**


	38. Epilogue 2: Devotion

**A/N: I apologize for this taking a bit longer than I'd wanted it to. But here you go. Hope you enjoy.**

**A couple of things.**

**Piper-lane has created a beautiful banner for the epilogues to this story! I am seriously touched and grateful to everyone that's created banners for this story. You can find a link to it on my profile page, or go to http(semicolon)(backslashbackslash)i1232(dot)photobucket(dot)com/albums/ff379/reader101/Ep2-2(dot)jpg **

**Also, I had the pleasure of being interviewed this week by wtf(dot)am(dot)I(dot)doing for the Twi-Muses blog! It was really, really fun, and I think I've met my Australian long lost soul sister! I swear, half of our side conversations consisted of the sentence "me too, me too!" Anyway, as soon as that gets posted I'll give you guys the info so you can take a look at it if you'd like some background info on what goes through my head as I'm writing these stories, as well as some insight into the characters from 'If We Ever Meet Again.'**

**Danna0724 betad this epi for me. And she's promised her services to me for the foreseeable future (I'm keeping you to that bb!)**

**One more epi after this, from a certain princess's POV. **

**All characters (except the Cullen kids) belong to S. Meyer. I'm just moving them to the East Coast for a bit.**

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**Epilogue 2 – Devotion**

Chapter Song Rec: _Always_ by Atlantic Starr (oldie but goodie).

**BPOV**

**Seven years after the marriage of Edward and Bella Cullen:**

"Jace, out of the water! Jace! Jason Christopher Cullen!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, launching top speed out of my beach chair and taking off towards the water. I'd literally turned around for two seconds to take the sunscreen out of the beach bag so I could reapply it to his back. By the time I turned back around Jace had already jumped out of his chair and made it to the shoreline. Like his father, he had the speed of a bullet.

Of course, he completely ignored my desperate screams and plunged into the water, his bronze hair waving wildly in the beach breeze and his mischievous giggles carrying in the warm wind.

Thankfully, Edward caught him before the waves completely submerged him. He scooped Jace up from behind, turning him upside down over his head. Jace squealed in delight. I stopped and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Again daddy, again!" Jace begged, laughing his impish Cullen laugh.

Edward and I locked eyes. He shook his head and grinned, bright rays falling around him and making his sun kissed shoulders and chest radiate in the late summer sun.

"Relax love, I've got him."

He flipped Jace over and sat him down on his broad shoulders. "_Not_ again little man. You almost gave mommy and me a heart attack. What were you doing running into the water like that?"

Our three-year old son extended his tiny finger towards the calm, grey waters of the Hamptons shoreline, pointing at two twenty-something girls who were, at the moment, staring wide-eyed and shamelessly not at him, but at his father.

"Pwetty girls."

Despite the scare he'd just given me, it took all my effort not to give in to peels of laughter. Jace was _so_ his father's son.

Lips pressed together tightly, Edward turned his eyes to me once again. He grinned sheepishly and shrugged before lowering Jace back down to the sand, tousling his hair and giving him a gentle tug in my direction.

"You get back over there to mommy and don't worry about pretty girls for now," he ordered, but I could hear the barely controlled laughter in his voice. "It's time for your nap."

Hands on my hips, I waited for Jace, but half way to me he turned around and in a split second was in front of his father again.

"Daddy, I don't want nap. I make sand castles with you and Maddie and Megan."

Maddie smiled, but I heard Megan's groan of protest all the way over here. I chuckled.

"No daddy! Don't let him," Meg complained, the breeze blowing her long, reddish blonde hair all around her face. She pushed it away roughly and huffed. "You know he always pretends he's a dragon and messes up our castles! Go back to mommy Jace!" she commanded. At five, Megan had little patience for her younger brother's antics.

"Jace, come here," Maddie said, tugging her little brother carefully by one arm and pulling him to sit next to her. He fell on his bottom over the sand at her side, smiling up adoringly at his oldest sister, who had a tendency to indulge him. "If you promise to be good, I'll let you help me build the moat."

"I be good Maddie," Jace promised, smiling widely and showing off both his dimples. I smirked, hopeful but not totally convinced of Jace's good intentions. Now that naptime for Jace was clearly over, I strolled back down to rejoin my family. The warm sand caressed my bare feet, running between my toes.

It was late August, another summer quickly coming to a close. The long, warm days had had enough time over the past few months to warm the once cool sand, and to kindle the usually cool Atlantic waters. As had become our yearly tradition, we'd spent the last couple of weeks of the month at the beach. It was the time of year the kids, as well as Edward and I, looked forward to the most. Every year, we'd spend the first week up here by ourselves, just the five of us and Sparky, our Lab. For the second week, Alice and Jasper and their brood, and Rose and Emmett and theirs would join us. And while having our extended family with us for the last week of summer was always a treat, the last day of our time alone, just the five of us, was a special day.

I sunk to my knees next to Edward, raising an arm to his tanned shoulders, enjoying the warmth of them beneath my hands. He turned and gave me his crooked grin, flashing those sea-green eyes I'd never get tired of, eyes which had finally been recreated in our son. Both our daughters had my eyes, pools of melted chocolate, as Edward called them.

"Alright," Edward said, clapping his hands, "Let's get back to it." Edward took his summer sandcastles very seriously. "Meggie pie, you finish working on the south tower" – all eyes flashed to me in mock reproach at the mention of the south tower – "and Maddie princess, you and I need to get this moat done."

"Me too finish moat," Jace reminded him.

"You too finish the moat little man," Edward assured him with a chuckle, tousling his sand-filled hair again.

"And what do I do?" I asked.

Maddie looked at me, her mouth turning up in exactly the same smirk her father tended to wear.

"Mommy…why don't you just sit there and…supervise for now?" she suggested with a familiar lop-sided grin.

I crossed my arms in mock insult, sitting back and resting my butt over my knees. Maddie smiled and Edward chuckled at his eldest daughter's wittiness; his relief at her continued devotion to the family sandcastle plainly evident in the now-relaxed set of his forehead.

He hadn't been quite so relaxed a little while ago.

This summer, Maddie had become good friends with the twin daughters of the family who'd just bought the beach house next to us, Casey and Cassidy. They were the same age as her, and so the three had quickly become best summer friends. Edward and I had become pretty friendly with their parents, and a couple of times during the week we'd even barbecued together in the late afternoons, sitting out on our decks, watching the sun set over the sparkling waters and enjoying a bottle of wine while the kids played and ran around in the sand.

Unfortunately, at least in Edward's eyes, Casey and Cassidy also had an older brother, Jayden.

Jayden was a year older than the twins; tall and lanky, the way thirteen-year-old boys tended to be, with a head full of shockingly golden-blonde hair. And he had a free and easy grin that made him look like that boy from the _Home Alone_ movies.

So it was a few hours ago, when the sandcastle project had just gotten underway, that Casey and Cassidy had returned from a morning with their parents in town. Like typical tween girls, they'd immediately come looking for their new BFF and had waved her over happily from outside the back door to their house.

Excited to see her friends, Maddie turned to us. "Mommy, Daddy, can I go hang out with Casey and Cassidy?"

I could see the flicker of disappointment in Edward's eyes; this was the last day we'd be alone as a family. Alice and Jasper would be arriving tomorrow. And he'd been looking forward to the sandcastle project since breakfast.

But his mouth quickly turned up in his signature crooked grin, and he flashed it widely at our daughter.

"Sure," he agreed easily. "Just don't wander off too far."

"I won't!" Maddie called out, already up on her feet and running. Edward looked after her, a wistful expression on his face. Suddenly Maddie turned around and ran back to her father. She bent down quickly and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Thanks daddy!" And she ran off again. Edward smiled and watched her go.

But the smile quickly morphed into a scowl when Jayden stepped out from the back door, moving to join his sisters and Maddie by the deck.

I followed Edward's gaze. "She'll be fine," I smiled reassuringly. "Besides we can see them plain as day from here."

The scowl didn't leave his face. "Why does _he_ have to hang out with them?"

"Uhm, because they're his sisters. And Maddie's his friend too. I warned you once, you wouldn't be able to keep her away from boys forever," I laughed teasingly. Edward's scowl only deepened. I touched his shoulder soothingly. "Edward, he's just a thirteen-year old boy. You're being silly."

His lip turned up in a snarl and he mumbled something unintelligible about having been thirteen once and beautiful daughters and karma.

Every couple of minutes after that, while he and Meg and Jace and I built the skeleton to our castle, we'd hear Maddie and her friends' laughing and giggling, and Edward's head would shoot up in their direction, glaring. I watched him out of the corner of my eye, amused. After a few instances of this, I looked over to the deck, and saw Jayden looking over at us nervously.

He turned to Maddie and his sisters and lowered his voice. But on the beach, conversations usually got carried pretty easily with the ocean breeze.

"Your dad keeps looking over here and giving me the evil eye."

I stifled a laugh, because really, it wasn't funny. Well, maybe a little funny.

His sisters giggled. "That's because he thinks you _like_ Maddie," one of them said.

"_Ewww_!" all three girls exclaimed, bursting into fits of laughter.

Jayden chuckled nervously, looking down at his feet, his Adam's Apple bobbing up and down.

"Yeah, Eww," he agreed. But the way his voice shook betrayed him, at least to the adults.

To this day I maintain that was the moment my husband's first forehead crease appeared. Edward agrees.

"Did you see that?" he hissed between his teeth.

I put one hand on his bare chest.

"So maybe he has a little crush," I whispered quietly. "It's no big deal."

"We're putting the beach house up on the market tomorrow."

"No, we're not."

"Yes, we are."

"No, we're not."

He sighed heavily.

"Well we're not coming back next year."

"Yes, we are."

"No, we're not."

"Yes, we are."

He sucked his teeth and sighed even deeper.

That was when Sparky, our four-year old Lab sauntered over to us, and started licking Edward's arm.

"Go Sparky!" Edward whispered roughly, jerking his head towards the house where this new perceived threat lay. "Kill! Go!"

"Edward!" I choked, turning towards him so quickly that I accidentally knocked the bucket in my hand into the south tower of the castle.

"Mommy!" Meg screamed as the tower fell.

"Attack! Maim at least!" Edward continued commanding Sparky, ignoring me and the damage to the castle.

Sparky stared at Edward for a few seconds, panting quickly with his tongue hanging out.

He then proceeded to lick Edward's face.

I fell to the sand, laughing.

"Useless mutt," Edward growled, wiping his face with the back of his hand. "That's what happens when you name a dog Sparky. We should've named him Cujo like I suggested."

My laughter turned to chuckles and then I sat up again and nodded my head towards the sandcastle.

"We have a problem," I said, pointing at the collapsed tower and trying to distract Edward from his futile and inappropriate attempts to have a thirteen-year old boy dismembered.

"Daddy mommy knocked the tower down! Now we gotta start it _all_ over again. Come on daddy, come on!" Meg ordered, pulling on his hand. She'd noticed her father's inattention, though she was still too young and too involved in the sandcastle project to understand what had him that way.

But Edward could never disappoint one of his daughters.

"What? Oh sorry Meggie Pie," he apologized. "Come on, Daddy'll help you fix it…" He glared up at the neighbor's house once more, but the kids were no longer paying any attention over here. Huffing, he turned back to his other daughter. I chuckled and shook my head.

Maddie returned to us a couple of hours later, and Edward breathed a quiet sigh of relief.

And now, because I'd accidentally knocked down the south tower of the castle, thanks to _him_, I was being down-graded to supervisory duties. I grimaced in Edward's direction. Meg watched me and giggled.

"Daddy, make mommy laugh. Maddie hurt her feelings."

I chuckled and reached out for my youngest daughter's long wavy hair, pulling gently on a few strands. "Maddie didn't hurt my feelings Meg. I don't mind supervising."

But now that Maddie was back and Jayden was nowhere in sight, Edward was feeling playful again. And more than willing to obey his daughter's command.

"You heard what Meg said. I've gotta make you laugh." In an instant he'd pushed me into the sand and thrown himself over me, his long fingers trailing quickly and insistently up my sides. I squealed.

"Stop Edward, stop!" I begged, as he attacked my underarms. Then he lowered his still stubbly jaw line to my neck, rubbing up and down quickly. My back arched off the sand. "Please stop!" I cried through my chortles, listening to the laughter of our three children in the background.

He chuckled and whispered in my ear. "Oh, _now_ please stop. Last night you couldn't get enough."

I laughed even harder, because he was right.

"Eww, alright guys, that's enough!" Maddie said. I looked over at her and caught her rolling her pre-teen eyes at us. "There're people passing by, and they might have a camera or something and the next thing you know, you two are all over the papers all kissing and everything. Blegh!" She made a face.

"Yes, God forbid the world find out you guys have parents that are in love. That would just be so un-cool," Edward teased her.

All three kids 'ewwed' together.

Edward snorted against my neck, his warm breath washing over me, before placing a soft lingering kiss on it. "We'll continue this tonight out on the deck, after the kids are in bed," he promised quietly.

"We'd better," I teased under my breath.

Even all these years later, his words and his touch were more than enough to send a scorching wave of heat through me. I grinned and watched him lift himself off of me slowly, the muscles in his strong shoulders flexing, his six-pack contracting tightly. In his mid-thirties, Edward was still the sexiest man alive. And suddenly bed-time couldn't come fast enough.

If it was true that age made you wiser, Edward was living proof that it also made you more perfect. At least, perfect for me. Sure, he had his faults, like we all did. For example, why was it so hard for him to turn his socks outside in before placing them in the laundry? And why did he and Jake insist on arm-wrestling like a couple of Neanderthals every time we all got together, even teaching Jace and Jake Jr. to arm wrestle? What was it with all the male testosterone that flowed every time the Cullen men and the Black men got together?

And his extreme generosity hadn't diminished one iota in the past few years, despite my constant reminders to him that I needed nothing beyond him and our children. I turned to look at the big white house a few feet away, its dark blue shutters faded by the salt-water in the wind and sun, in perfect contrast with the freshly painted white siding.

I mean seriously, who gave their wife a summer beach house as a birthday present?

All I'd said was 'that week at the Hamptons was so relaxing.' I suppose it was a good thing I hadn't said that when we'd spent a week on that Brazilian island a few years ago, or even worse, as we'd been touring that Italian castle in Tuscany during our honeymoon.

And don't even get me started on the over-protectiveness.

But in reality, none of these were faults, not in the real sense of the word. Because while it did occasionally annoy me when I had to spend fifteen minutes sorting through his socks and turning them outside in while doing laundry, I'd laugh just as hard as Charlie, or Carlisle, and even Esme, whenever Jace and little JJ pretended to arm-wrestle like their dads. And the beautiful house we spent two weeks in every summer and occasional weekends throughout the year? It held some of the sweetest memories of the years Edward and I had spent together so far. This was where Edward taught Maddie and me to surf. This was where little Meg took her first steps, holding on tightly to me or her dad's or her big sister's hands.

And one summer night, after Maddie and Meg were fast asleep in their rooms and the full moon was bright and high in the dark sky, and the gentle waves of the ocean broke soothingly like a lullaby against the wet sand of the shoreline, this was where Edward and I had laid a blanket over the sand just outside our house, and made Jace.

And Edward did protect us, all of us, from everything and everyone. I slept peacefully every night, and so did our children. My heart was safe.

While Edward and the kids kept working on their quest for the perfect summer sandcastle, I watched them, listening to the birds flying over the shore, singing the last of their summer songs. The tide came in, rippling softly as it advanced and retreated. And the occasional drops of cool saltwater carried by the breeze caressed my warm skin. We played and we loved, and occasionally we worried and yelled. But we'd made a family. And each of our children, despite having their own unique personalities, carried a bit of both of us inside them.

It showed even in the way they took on their sandcastle project. Petite little Megan bit her lip, a small line appearing between her eyes while she determined which tool to use to dig out more sand. Impatient like her father, she threw the tool to the side and dug in with both hands. Jace, seeing his sister, and always ready to prove he could do things as well as she, threw himself into the moat and forked out mounds of sand in his arms. But the burden of being a good boy must've just gotten too heavy to carry, and the dragon within soon found its way out. With arms outstretched, little Godzilla growled and trampled, causing a mudslide of epic proportions along the western wall of the long moat.

"Jace, no!" Megan cried. "Daddy look what Jace did!"

Edward smiled patiently. "It's okay. We'll fix it."

Maddie smiled too. Physically, she was a darker version of me at her age, though much prettier, taller, her pre-teen body leaner and more toned from years of ballet and daily runs with her father. But she had Edward's ability to be patient - when it really mattered.

"Yeah Meggie," she assured her little sister. "Don't worry, we'll all fix it together." She looked up at her father, and they shared a smile. "It's still early, and we've got forever."

She was absolutely right. We did.

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**A/N: Jace. The name of another one of my modern day literary heroes. Anyone know who?**

**Reviews are as soothing as a late summer day at the beach. Leave one.**

**One more epi left. Hopefully next week.**


	39. Epilogue 3: Dedication

**A/N: Alright guys, this is it. **

**I've been thinking, when I first started writing this story, I saw it as a love story between Edward and Bella. And it was. But at some point I realized it was also a story about a daughter and her father.**

**Here is their conclusion. I hope this makes sense. Most of us have an identity crisis at some point in our lives, even in the best of families. It has nothing to do with being grateful or ungrateful. It is part of youth, and confusion and finding ourselves while a bunch of questions and hormones run around inside us. What matters is what we find at the end of that crisis, and who is there to help us through it…**

**Danna0724, aka Danna, love you lots girl. Thanks so much for beta-ing yet another story for me. **

**Epilogue 3: Dedication**

**Chapter Song Recs:  
**_**Because You Loved Me**_** by Celine Dion (I know I used this one already, but it's just fitting here).  
**_**Wind Beneath My Wings**_** by Bette Midler**

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**MPOV**

**Twenty-one years after the marriage of Edward and Bella Cullen:**

Madisen Cullen walks to the middle of the stage, her heels clicking against the cool tiles of the floor. The sound reverberates loudly throughout the large auditorium and in her ears, and Maddie can feel all eyes on her, but this doesn't necessarily make her nervous. After all, she's Edward and Bella Cullen's daughter; she's more or less grown up in the public eye and is used to being watched. Still, she does feel a slight reddening in her cheeks, but her caramel skin tone hides most of her blush. When she reaches the microphone, she adjusts the stand and raises it a bit. The last girl on stage was petite, and at five foot nine, Maddie is tall by most measures. In her three inch heels, she's close to six feet today.

She looks out at the audience assembled today; a mixture of families both young and old, mothers and fathers, husbands and wives, girlfriends and boyfriends, siblings and friends. Her eyes finally locate her own family, and her face breaks out in a huge grin. Everyone's come out today, even her grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins. She lets her eyes trail quickly over each and every face, until they reach the ones she's looking for. At the very end of the row, emerald eyes twinkle up at her encouragingly, they way they have for as far back as she can remember, and she smiles back tenderly.

She grins and clears her throat. She has it all written down, but she has a feeling she won't need her notes too much.

"Many people aren't fortunate enough to be able to say this, but I remember the first time I met my father."

Smiles appear across the crowd, because everyone knows who Madisen Cullen's father is. He and his family have fascinated the world for decades.

"Though the memory is admittedly a bit fuzzy, I recall looking up at a tall, bronze-haired man with the smile of an angel" – everyone chuckles because they agree, Edward Cullen's smile rivals that of any heavenly being – "and then he knelt down in front of me and the rays from the sun hit him from behind, and I was like 'whoa! He really _is_ an angel!'"

The crowd laughs and Maddie laughs with them. The bronze-haired angel of who she speaks chuckles, glancing at his wife with one of the aforementioned signature grins. He knits his hand through hers and squeezes tightly.

"I think I believed my father to be an angel for a long time. That is, until I figured out he was much more than that. He was my dad."

Edward sighs, an emotional unsteady sigh. Only his family, seated around him, can see the glassiness in his green eyes.

_Maddie remembers an early spring day, over twenty-one years ago, by the lake at Central Park. Her arms are wrapped around her father's neck, and she revels in how warm and safe she feels in his arms. It's a feeling that will stay with her forever:_

_Did Daddy just teuh me I'm a Tullen now? Is that what he's teuhing me?_

"_You mean I'm Maddie Gwace Tullen now?" she remembers breathing hopefully._

_He tells her that yes, she's a Cullen now. And Maddie knows this means something special. Because Juliana's last name is the same as her daddy's. And now so is hers. He starts explaining things to her carefully, words he knows she'll understand at her tender age. He calls her his princess, the way he has since the first time she saw him. And she calls him daddy. Because she realized a few weeks ago that he took care of her; he sang to her; he read her stories; he made her feel better when she had a booboo; he took her to the park; he kissed her mommy and loved her mommy._

_He was daddy._

"My mom and dad have been married for twenty-one years now," Maddie continues. Sighs go up in the audience. "In those years they've raised me and my brother and sister…"

Maddie's eyes trail to her sister Megan, and Meg beams at her proudly. The two sisters have always been very close, even though there are six years between them. At twenty, Megan is an undisputed beauty. Mouths fall open and eyes bulge out of their sockets when she walks by waving her long, reddish blonde hair, just a shade lighter than her father's. She is quite aware of her beauty, much to their father's chagrin, but seeing how her father treats her mother has allowed her to grow up with a strong sense of self-respect and worth. She is petite, like their mother, only standing at five foot four, but she makes up for her small size with her fiery temper and the unapologetic way she speaks her mind. Megan Cullen is a force to be reckoned with, and if her career plans to join her father at CCW when she graduates from Columbia Business School continue, God help every other ad agency in the country.

And God help Edward Cullen.

Sitting next to Meg is their brother, eighteen year old Jace. While Megan and Maddie are as close as sisters can get, they are, in fact, sisters, and along with this relationship comes the occasional arguments and teasing. But Jace is Maddie's pride and joy, and although she is quite aware of his occasionally…mischievous ways, he can do no wrong in her eyes. And the feeling is mutual.

For all intents and purposes, Jace Cullen is a physical clone of their father. Whereas each girl has some bits of both Edward and Bella, either physical or in mannerisms, Jace is all Edward. Tall, lean but muscular, bronze hair the same exact shade as his father's, green eyes exactly like his father's, a cocky crooked grin that – much to his mother's chagrin – makes every female within a five-mile radius swoon on command, and rumor has it that it may have magically disintegrated more than one pair of panties already. But Jace swears up and down that he will behave himself at Princeton in September. He wants to study Forensics and follow his grandfather Charlie into law enforcement, into the FBI specifically. He says he wants to help defend and protect his country.

Maddie has a strong suspicion he just knows how unstoppable he'll be with that grin _and_ a badge.

He'll behave he says. Maddie is hopeful.

But she's not holding her breath.

But Jace has been taught the importance of respecting women; and although he may be a little on the…uhm… flirtatious side, he – as well as Meg and Maddie – knows some of the story of what their mom went through before she met their dad. None of them would ever like to be on the giving or receiving end of that type of relationship.

Maddie continues. "…and they've taught us the importance of hard work and dedication to achieve our goals, as well as the necessity to sacrifice sometimes, and to help those less fortunate than ourselves."

Maddie looks at her mom and they share a tender smile. Bella Cullen is one of the most admired and well-respected women in the city, even with as much as she tries to stay out of the public eye. Maddie knows her mom has never been completely comfortable being in the public eye, but she has sacrificed her comfort to give her children as normal a childhood as possible. And it was. There were beach vacations and ski trips, PTA meetings and parent-teacher conferences, play dates and sledding down the hills in Central Park and afternoon strolls around the city. And Bella Cullen did it all with such grace and perceived ease that the media rarely bothered them. There were no scowls, or fights or scenes in public.

As much as Bella enjoyed her work at CCW, it got to the point where she felt she needed more time with her children, and so little by little she handed over her accounts, and eventually left CCW and joined Nanny Esme on the boards of several fundraising charities, raising money for those less fortunate, especially for women who found themselves in abusive relationships, either physical or emotional.

But she made sure her children knew that her decision was just one possible road of many.

"My mom has been a most positive role model to my siblings and myself, and I know that without her encouragement I wouldn't be here today..."

Maddie and her mom lock eyes, and Maddie swallows thickly.

"…but…today I'd like to talk about my dad."

Bella nods her head once at her eldest daughter, because she already knows what the speech will consist of. Maddie has read it to her mother, for her opinion and advice, and Bella has assured her that it's just about perfect at this point.

But Edward wasn't aware until now what would be in his daughter's speech. Maddie turns her gaze to him, and he looks startled, but a small smile plays on the edges of his mouth. And he waits for his daughter to continue.

"As much as I owe both my parents – and after paying for this school, believe me I owe them a lot" - she snorts. Everyone laughs and nods – "I'm standing _here_ today, in front of all of you, because of my father."

Maddie watches her father draw in a deep breath, his green eyes twinkle, and he exhales heavily through narrowed lips. Bella leans over and whispers something in his ear, and even from here Maddie can see her father relaxing at her mother's soft words.

"My father has always, always put family first, no matter what."

Maddie thinks back to her childhood. Christmas vacations, summer retreats, birthdays, anniversaries, scraped knees, recitals, soccer games, sibling fights, broken hearts…

One summer, almost a decade ago, back at their summer home in the Hamptons:

_It was the end of the summer season, and Maddie and her family would be heading back to NYC by the end of the week._

_And Jayden would be going to law school in Cambridge at the end of the month._

_Maddie's seventeen year old heart was breaking. _

_They had lain under the stars that night, she and Jayden, on a blanket between the tall sand dunes all the way at the end of the beach, away from tourists and residents alike. The sand tickled her toes where it spilled over the blanket, and as Jayden rubbed his bare feet against hers, the sand scratched at the top of her feet. She tried to focus on how that felt, on the way it chafed her skin, because the look in Jayden's eyes was chafing her heart. _

"_Please Maddie, just take a look at the brochures," Jayden pleaded. "It's a great school, and…and they have a wonderful business school program." He held her face gently between his hands, his blue eyes boring into her dark ones, his blond curls falling over his forehead and the scent of the sea and of soap and of him mixing together in the night breeze and washing over her. "I know my grandparents would love to have you come and stay with us." And then he seemed to rethink what he'd said. "Or you can dorm in the halls," he said quickly, "if your dad would feel more comfortable with that."_

_Maddie gazed into his eyes, her heart begging her to say yes. Yes, she'd look at the brochures. Yes, she'd fall in love with Cambridge's business school, with its centuries-old reputation. Yes, of course she'd follow him to England and to Cambridge._

_But she couldn't. Because if she was being honest with herself, the way her parents had taught her to be, it wouldn't be for her love of Cambridge, or of their business school she'd be going for. It would be for her love of Jayden. _

_She broke both their hearts that night under the stars. And even the knowledge that she was making the right decision for herself didn't ease the ache, didn't make the feel of Jayden's lips kissing away her tears burn any less. But she knew she would've regretted giving up her dreams for someone else's._

_She was in a horrible mood all that fall. She fought constantly with a pre-teen Megan, who wanted nothing more than to follow and imitate her sister all the time. Jace's ten-year-old happy-go-lucky grins and teasing and energy grated on her last nerve. Her mom tried to talk to her, but even though Maddie knew she was right when she told her about her own experience, she didn't want to hear it. Her father was always trying to cheer her up, or running quietly next to her during their morning jogs. But something was missing. And Maddie wasn't sure what it was._

_Looking back on it, Maddie realizes it was bound to happen one day, and her heartbreak over Jayden was probably just the catapult. She started questioning everything; her priorities, her life, her family…_

_One cold winter day, in the middle of her senior year of high school, Madisen Cullen called Paul Forrester. _

_Paul was living in a small town called Hoquiam, not far from where Maddie was born in Forks, Washington, where Uncle Jake and Aunt Leah and their family, and Grandpa Charlie and Granny Sue still lived, and where she and her family visited a couple of times a year. Paul invited her to visit, and Maddie accepted._

_Bella was livid when Maddie informed her parents that night._

"_What were you thinking Maddie? I know you've been upset, but this makes no sense!"_

_Edward sat quietly across the table from his daughter, his expression a mixture of surprise and something else Maddie couldn't quite read at that moment._

_But Maddie was ready for a fight. Months of heartache had left her angry, and if her parents tried to challenge her now, she'd blow. Maybe she'd even take that trip to England after all, because if no one else, Jayden would understand her…_

"_Bella, Maddie isn't a little girl anymore, and we have to respect her decisions."_

_Maddie gave her father a startled look, because she'd expected him to be the one to react most strongly. He'd always been so protective of his children, especially of her. _

"_I know that Edward," Bella had responded, "but there's no need for her to go see-" _

"_Mom, I have to go," Maddie had pleaded, the anger suddenly distinguished. _

_It was her dad who'd reached across the table and taken her hand in his. Maddie looked at her hand inside her father's and it calmed her and strengthened her all at once. His green eyes had blazed with understanding._

"_Maddie, your mom and I may not completely agree with this decision, but we're here for you princess, no matter what. If this is something you feel you need to do, we'll support you."_

_Then her dad had looked over at her mom, and slowly, her mom had nodded her agreement._

_Her dad's eyes had followed her all the way through Customs a few days later. When Maddie had boarded the plane, it was her dad's eyes that stayed with her._

_And when she met Paul Forrester, it was her dad she'd wanted next to her, to give her the strength and encouragement he'd always given her._

_Her visit with Paul Forrester was pleasant enough. He asked her all the basic questions; how she liked school, if she had a boyfriend, what she planned to do with her life. But it only took a couple of hours for Maddie to realize she'd boarded a plane and flown to the other end of the country to find what was already in her own back yard._

_Where she belonged._

_Who she was._

_Who loved her._

_This man, who had her coloring, and the shape of her eyes, and her straight hair, was a stranger. He may have had something to do with making her, but she was Madisen Grace Cullen; daughter of Edward and Isabella Cullen. _

_She was a girl who loved sports and dance, who played soccer like no one's business, who grinned crookedly and smirked openly, who ran her hand through her hair when she was frustrated, and who'd run an endless number of miles with her dad for over a decade, miles during which she'd opened her heart to him, and he'd listened, giving advice when necessary, saying nothing when not, making her laugh with his own stories, and holding her up in every way all the time in between. _

_Maddie realized that she did know what she wanted to do with her life, and no matter how much it hurt, she knew the road to that life didn't lead to England, at least not now. She finally saw the light at the end of the tunnel, and the light at the end of the tunnel held her hand when she fell, laughed at her bad jokes, and still called her princess._

_Her parents met her by the gates when she deplaned from her trip to Washington, and Maddie launched herself into her father's arms, oblivious to the stares, to the camera flashes going off. _

"_I'm sorry daddy," she cried into his shoulder, no longer having to stand on tip toes to reach there. "I'm so sorry daddy."_

_Because she'd realized on the airplane ride back what the look that mixed with surprise had been at the table. It had been fear. It had been hurt. But he'd hidden it from her, because as always, her dad wanted her to make her decisions for herself._

"_Shh," he cooed, wrapping her in one of the hugs that had always made her feel so safe. "There's nothing for you to apologize for Maddie. You didn't do anything wrong," he assured her._

_Her mom and dad had led her quietly back to their waiting car._

_Bella drove, while Maddie sat in the back with her father._

"_I hurt you daddy," Maddie cried. _

_Edward chuckled quietly. "I'm fine princess." _

_Maddie looked into his eyes and saw that it was true. She'd come home to him, and that's all her father cared about._

"_You'll always be my daddy," she told him then._

_He'd grinned widely at her, his eyes sparkling. "I know that princess. I know that."_

"_I wasn't sure who I was."_

"_And do you know now?"_

"_I think so."_

_He chuckled. "Figuring that out is a life long process." He looked at her intently. "You be who you want to be, what you want to be, and I will always support you."_

_And then he'd held her against his shoulder and she'd fallen asleep in his strong arms, just as she'd had since she was four._

_She'd eventually gotten over her broken heart, and one day she'd woken up and realized she could breathe again._

_The fights with Meg stopped. For the most part._

_Jace's antics became amusing to her again. For the most part._

_She and her mom saw eye to eye again. For the most part._

_And she and her dad…their morning jogs were no longer silent. And they kicked everyone else's ass during family soccer games._

_For the most part. Uncle Jasper and Aunt Alice were no joke._

Maddie continued her speech…

"And even when I wasn't sure who I was, or what I wanted, I knew no matter what that turned out to be, my dad would be there to support me, even if it was hard for him to do so."

Maddie met her father's gaze, and he smirked knowingly. She held in a chuckle, carefully running her thumb over the fourth finger on her left hand.

_Two years ago…_

_Maddie was on a short break that evening; half a night still ahead of her. The evening was cool, one of those late summer nights that reminded you that Fall was just around the corner. She was crossing over to the small deli across the street from where she was interning, and as she waited for the red light to change to green, she wrapped her lab coat around herself tighter, cursing the thinness of the green scrubs she wore._

"_Maddie," she heard from right next to her, and she didn't even have to look to know who the voice belonged to. That voice was etched deep in her heart, the way it had been since the first time he'd kissed her in between the sand dunes when she was fifteen. And nine years and a handful of boyfriends since that first kiss, it was still his blue eyes she saw in her dreams. _

_She whipped her head around quickly, and even though she knew what they'd find, her dark eyes grew wide in surprise anyway when they met eyes as blue as the morning sky._

"_Jayden."_

_Seven years had passed since she'd last seen him. He'd been an eighteen-year old boy then, and Maddie had spent many nights wondering what kind of man he'd grown into._

_His face had matured; his cleft jaw squarer than she remembered; the softness of youth gone and a smooth strength in its place. He'd grown taller, and now stood at about the same height as her father, which was a good thing because Maddie was tall herself. His shoulders were broader than she recalled, strong and confident. His blonde curls no longer fell over his forehead; his hair was short except for the front where he'd spiked it. But it was his eyes that made her gasp. The same soft, sweet, open blue eyes she saw in her dreams._

_He took her for a cup of coffee and made no secret of the fact that he'd come looking for her. He told her he'd never forgotten her, sighed in relief when she told him she wasn't currently in a relationship, and gazed into her big brown eyes with the same love and awe that had been there since they were kids. He was a junior partner in a prestigious law firm in London, but something was missing. And by the time her coffee break was over, he'd made it clear he knew exactly what that missing piece had been._

_Eighteen months later, Jayden opened his own law office in a small building in downtown Tribeca. It would take hard work and sacrifice, because both of their careers were just getting started, but they had each other._

_It was two months ago when Maddie was out for her morning jog with her dad, and his silence let her know he had something on his mind. They stopped after a while under a large weeping willow by the lake, its heavy canopy shading them from the high sun; long branches reflected in the algae-green waters of the lake. They were both breathing hard from exertion, though her dad could still go a few more miles. She smirked at two twenty-something year olds that jogged by them, craning their necks around to gawk at her father for as long as possible. In his late forties, he was still in better shape than most of the men she knew in their twenties, and based on all the open stares and ogles he received, Maddie wasn't the only one who thought so. _

"_Jayden stopped by the office yesterday," her dad finally said, pulling her attention away from the scowl she was currently giving the ogling women. Maddie stiffened, because although she could imagine what that visit had been about, she hadn't known Jayden planned to speak to her father. She was still trying to figure out how to tell him herself._

"_Are you sure Maddie?" _

"_Yes, daddy. I'm very sure."_

"_But you're so young…"_

"_Daddy, I'm no younger than mom was."_

"_Those were different times."_

_She raised her eyebrows at him. And laughed._

_Edward sighed, a long profound sigh that came from deep within his chest. He trained his eyes on the glittering lake. "Yeah well, I don't like how arrogantly he went about it. It wasn't so much a request as much as a sharing of information," he said in an annoyed tone. _

_Maddie chuckled, but didn't take offense at her dad's words or tone. She knew that, though she was twenty-six years old, when Edward Cullen looked at her, he still saw his four-year old baby. She knew this because when she looked at him, though a few lines now graced his strong forehead and a couple of silver hairs mixed with his bronze ones near his temple, she still saw the beautiful bronze-haired angel with the sun's rays behind him. _

"_Daddy, how many guys nowadays would come to their girlfriend's father at all?"_

"_I did it," he answered in a clipped tone, "and believe you me, your grandfather didn't make it easy for me. Made me sweat some serious bullets."_

"_The way you did for Jayden?" she asked, raising one brow._

_For a split-second, he looked contrite. After a while he added begrudgingly, "I suppose I should be grateful he at least shows some respect for family."_

_Maddie chuckled again and reached out and wrapped an arm around her dad's shoulder, placing a soft kiss on his cheek. He pursed his lips, but she could feel his shoulders relaxing._

"_Daddy, Jayden has a lot of respect for family. It's one of the reasons why I love him. He reminds me of you…in many ways."_

_It was true. Her dad was a hard act to follow, but she was sure she'd found the one man that could do it._

_Edward snorted. He turned his head to where Maddie's hand reached around his shoulder, bringing one of his own hands over hers, pursing his lips as he traced the new ring on her left hand. Maddie laughed at the petulant expression on his face._

"_I knew that kid was trouble from the first moment I laid eyes on him," he grumbled, and then mumbled something about how he should've sold the summer house right away, but Maddie was laughing so hard she didn't quite hear it._

_He turned serious eyes to his daughter once more. "As long as you're happy Maddie, as long as you're content with your decisions, then that's all I ask for."_

"_I'm very content daddy."_

_Edward's eyes softened, greener and clearer than the lake's waters. "Well then, I guess its time to welcome Jayden into the family."_

"_No more grumbling?" she smiled._

"_No more grumbling," he promised._

_And father and daughter gazed out at the lake, watching as the kites flew high above, and the sun glistened over the city skyline._

"My dad once told me that it's not just the destination, but the road we take that makes us who we are. I could've taken many roads and may have ended up in a place similar to where I am now, but they wouldn't have been my road to take, and the trip wouldn't have felt as personal."

Maddie smiles down at Jayden, who's sitting proudly next to her Grandpa Carlisle, and he smiles back, understanding what she means. She took her own road, and he loves and respects her all the more for it.

"I stand here before you today, because during some tough times, my dad trusted me enough to let me make my own decisions. He let me choose my own roads, so the trip has been all mine, and it's hard to regret a trip you've navigated yourself. And the day I decided I wouldn't be joining him at CCW, and told him what I really wanted to do with my life, he simply laughed and called my grandfather Carlisle and told him he'd finally found him someone to take over the legacy."

Everyone laughs, and she looks at Grandpa Carlisle, still as handsome and distinguished as ever, and he absolutely beams at her. He's more than ready to let her take over.

"So daddy," Maddie says, gazing down lovingly at her father, "I dedicate this day to you, for giving me strength, for letting me spread my wings, for being there to hold me when I fell," – her voice breaks, and Edward quickly wipes a tear off his cheek. Bella leans over and kisses one off of his other cheek – "for _always_ being my daddy."

Cheers and clapping erupt, and everyone present stands up for an ovation. But no one claps harder than Edward Cullen when, a few minutes later, Doctor Madisen Grace Cullen receives her medical degree.

* * *

**A/N: Alright guys. This is the end. I've already made all my thanks, and I won't put you guys through that again. I've appreciated all your words of love and encouragement, and your fury and complaints at times too, because it's shown how much this story has touched some of you.**

**I know many of you have asked what ever happened to Tanya, or Lauren, but this story wasn't about revenge, or making sure they got theirs in the end. It was about family. You can imagine any kind of ending you want for the villains in this story and I'll go along with it. As a matter of fact, I'd love to hear what they are. But I tend to believe that living well is the best form or revenge, if revenge is at all necessary. **

**So thanks again, and hope to hear from all of you in the future.**


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